Tomorrow - Episode 69: Paul Ford in the Funny Valley

Episode Date: September 13, 2016

Okay, this might sound insane but hear us out: Have you heard about Paul Ford? The reptilian overlord who carries out false flag operations against Hillary Clinton's body double? This week Josh, noted Zionist shill, sits down with the mysterious figure to discuss the seltzer controversy, the internet's notorious egg people, and where all the toothpaste is coming from. You will absolutely not want to miss out on this information, information the media DOESN'T WANT YOU TO SEE – especially if you're a snake handler or a word processing drone. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey and welcome to Tomorrow, I'm your host Josh with Topolsky. Today in the podcast we discuss Agekin, Dongles, and Snake to Tomorrow. I'm your host Josh Wittipulski. Today in the podcast we discuss Agekin, Dongles, and Snake Handling. I don't want to waste one minute so let's get right into it. My guest today is one of my favorite people to have on this show and also one of my favorite people to have on this show. And also one of my favorite people in the world. He is a great writer. I believe he has coded before. I don't know all the details on that. He loves talking.

He has his own podcast, the name of which I can't think of at this moment. I'm of course talking about the great, the wonderful, the mysterious Paul Ford. Good to be back on the program, John. Thank you. What is the name of your podcast? My name of my podcast is Track Changes. Track Changes, which is of course a reference to the concept of tracking changes in a word software and software development. No, he had no word in a word project. It's a it's a a corporate word by Microsoft word. If you, I mean, word by Microsoft.

If you search for track changes, podcast, you're gonna find it out there. Just look it up. It's a tech, under the tech category. It's probably definitely under the tech category. A little bit of entrepreneurship. It's myself and my business co-founder Richie Adi. And great, he's also a great guy.

Wonderful, beautiful voice. Great guy, yeah. And we, he's also a great guy, wonderful, beautiful voice. Great guy, yeah. And we do a beautiful down together. And I think it's a real special kind of podcast. It's good to have one good podcast. And we're not too interested about technology. I'm getting, you know, when you guys started doing it, I was like, it's finally, someone's finally doing a show

about entrepreneurship and technology. And technology. It's about time. Yeah. Someone stepped up to the mic and just's about time. Yeah. Someone stepped up to the mic and just got in there. Yeah. Anyhow, so that's your plug for the podcast. It was.

Now, you know how to come on sometime. I would love, I would absolutely love to come on. You actually invited me. I'm going to put in the interest of transparency since we're in an election season. I was invited. I had to cancel. I... And we made no bones about it.

Can I say how much I appreciate having Seltzer during a recording? It's wonderful. You know, it's a wonderful thing to have. It's, you know, Argo Studios, where we record. It just makes water for a vibe. It's garbage. Like I've been drinking sewage at podcast recordings

up until now. I'm sorry. Water is, it's what you drink in a desperate situation where you're dying, you dehydrated. And there's no celtzer. Well, your body has an urgent need for carbon. And that's why you need to drink carbonated beverages. Your body needs bubbles. That's a great ad for us.

Half of the city, your body needs bubbles. Yeah, it's true. It feels very lenders. Give your body needs bubbles? Yeah, it's true. It feels like the lender's a bit. Give your body what it needs. Give your body bubbles. Stop denying your body the things that it wants. That's like $600,000 of work we just did there for the celture industry.

Put the bubbles inside of your body. No, it's give your body bubbles. Put the bubbles in there. Yeah, these are all good tag lines that you throw out and then you're like, but guys, guys, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. Wait a minute, wait a minute. wait a minute, wait a minute. Brainstorm, give your body bubbles.

Oh yeah, give your body bubbles. Give your body bubbles. Oh geez. Body bubbles. The key thing is to make it seem like you just came up with it, like I'm almost embarrassed to admit this. Or to actually seem like you think, maybe it's not that great of a thing.

You're like, I don't know, maybe this is kind of stupid. You know what I'm saying here, but I'm wondering what are all these. Give your body bubbles. I'm just throwing it out. One of our audience thinks of the celtzer industry all there at the table. What do they see? Um, LaCroix. I mean, first off, I don't want you, I'm so fucking sick of LaCroix.

What, I mean, that's just, it is what it is. Can we talk about it? No, I'm sorry, but listen, LaCroix, it's like a spree. It's mediocre celtzer. As a celtzer, it's just, it is what it is. Can we talk about it? No, I'm sorry, but listen, but look, it's like a spree. It's mediocre celtzer. As a celtzer, it's very mediocre in my opinion. It doesn't have the punch of a real stuff. It doesn't have, it doesn't hurt when you get like 49 cents. No, gross resection.

I actually was just having a Twitter conversation among several people in the media industry. Oh, cool. As we're want to do. We talk about your Twitter conversation. It's right now Twitter now is only, at this point, is just people in the media industry and the alt-right. That's the all that exists on Twitter.

What is verified and the other is eggs. They deserve each other. It's completely verified. The other is not verified. This is cool on a tech podcast. Let's talk about a Twitter conversation. Let's dive in. We were talking about somebody asked me to name my,

said, asked me to name the best shelter and why. I named, it's very hard to just say the best shelter because shelter comes in many forms. So, so I said, Gomberg slash Brooklyn Delivery Seltzer, which is from Gomberg. That's the best.

That's the number one top. You can, everything else can get the fuck out of my face. I mean, you don't, you don't know what real Celter is. You know how you can tell snobbish food stuff though, is if you go on YouTube and there's a video of the production process, and then see their old or a single source, and it all ends up looking like it came out of a manuscript.

That, like, so this is, you just, you say that to me and I'm like, I know I can go on YouTube and find a video of Celeltzer bottles being filled. There's several gomber, like quasi-document. I'm convinced that all artisanal stuff can be traced back to YouTube videos. It's all actually, man, it's all the whole thing is some kind of weird pondew scheme

where they just create a YouTube. They create like a fake factory anyhow. But so that's the top Seltzer if you've never had it and frankly most people haven't. And I'm not saying that to be snobbish, because I'm not trying to be snobbish. I'm not trying to be snobbish. It's a huge, epic thing.

It's a certain place, and you also have to be willing to pay when we got it delivered. It was $20 for 10 bottles, and we would get two cases at a time. Plus we'd tip our delivery guy, Ronnie, who's a staple in... So we'd pay $60 every, I think we'd pay $120 a month

for Celter. It doesn't shock me. But once you have it, you understand why you would pay that one. Does your daughter love Celter? She loves Celter. Yeah, my daughter, there are kids called it bubble water. Obsessed with... She calls it Celter

because she knows the words for things, okay. But maybe, you know, then again, you came up with, you know, give your body bubbles and I didn't. So, really, you're in touch with a whole other. No, let's compare and tell you what it is. Thank you, that sounds great. You're in touch with a whole other way of thinking about

how words work and that's one of their fault. Post pictures of her kids on Twitter and just have people rank them. Anyhow, listen, all children are beautiful unless they're annoying, in which case they're ugly. They're kind of annoying, so those are ugly. 40% of the time your child's annoying. But, and then of course, the best bottled,

traditional celtzer, in my opinion, and you can go a couple of different ways in this is Canada Dry Club Soda. Strong, strong, very, very powerful, in the glass bottles. I don't know if you can get it in anything but the glass bottles, and I wanna be clear, club soda and selter, not the same thing.

I'm not gonna get into the whole club soda versus selter. But you can read about it on the internet. And I'm not gonna hear it do your work for you. And then I think on the spring water, which I, When you talk about things like, I flash to Wikipedia screen with the top right image of the club salter and then they're gonna come to the club's soda and then there's like,

I thought you were taking the Wikipedia logo. No, no, just like the actual, like there's the page format and then there's the info box below and it's like carbonated beverage. Yeah, there's like a link to carbonated. The bad picture, that's what took it their apartment of the glass of salzer. Yeah, there's like a man's penis off the glass.

It's taking him one, nobody's real. I think he'd done the, how many hidden penises are in Wikipedia photos? I mean, honestly, Wikipedia is almost 100% hidden penises. We're like, I fucking ideas factory. Oh, yeah, this is good. We should charge people for these shows. Yeah, no, this is like.

This is just pure, this is a, a whole industry is being sprung up here. This is like watching an improv group use a Google Doc. It's really exciting. But this is real. This is this, hey Abel, take note. This is real time collaboration. Yeah.

I don't even know what that means. That's like a dis on Apple for no apparent reason. Yeah, you gotta get in there. I didn't hear it. And then I said it to toss up, I think Saratoga Springs makes a very strong Saratoga, sorry, Saratoga, they're celtier, they're carbonated carbonated. Huh, not sure about that one. Very strong, very strong spring celtor.

Okay. And then toba-chico would be of course the other in the running, I'd say, for that title. So for you, LeCroix, nothing. I mean, I'm garbage dump. I mean, it's fine if you want to, and it tastes like coconut, mean by all means. No, it's fine.

We drink La Croix at our house. I like the pamphle most. You know, I like the, I like the, that's pretty much it. The tangerines, okay. I don't care for most of the flavors. I don't like flavored things. I actually, if I'm gonna do flavored salsa,

I'd actually rather have like the cheap black raspberry flavor that you get at the bodega. I first thought La Croix is like going for something. So here's the thing, there's a huge, and this is big, I'm sure there's several trend pieces on this, but everybody's talking about how it's like, Coke sales are down, neverbodies drinking bottled water, you know, it's part of, it is part of like the wellness trend

and like the health trend. But I mean, you think about what that percentage really looks like, it's like, you know, .001% of Coke's global sales. Yeah, what I can say, here's what I can say with that. You know, Coke doesn't perform well in the Arab world. You know why? To American. Um, no, it's a Pepsi world.

It's not just because it's to American. They actually associated with some sort of genocide. I can't remember now. That happened. It's bad. It's almost a, it's almost like protocols of the elders kind of level. How is it a Jewish thing? Oh, yeah.

I mean, I did. Yeah. Sounds good stuff. Anyhow, we're just cruising from time to time. Just riff. Just riff. But I think the original question was, was there an original question?

I don't really know, but I know. No, we were completely about La Croix. Oh, La Croix. How did we get on the topic't really know, but I mean, you were complaining about LeCroix. Oh, LeCroix, how did we get on the topic of LeCroix? You were enjoying drinking salsa. I don't know, she was enjoying drinking salsa. You were talking about how wonderful it is to have salsa. It really is good. It's great stuff, but I worry and I'm waiting for the time,

either style piece or a really deeply reported heavily researched piece that says that celtors destroying your body, it's causing-restraint your body, is causing cancer. I think it's bad for bone density. Oh, here we go, is this shit. Really you think self-restraint is bad for bone density? That might be like a piece of a drummer. We'll think about the logic here.

You drink the carbonated water, the bubbles don't dissipate, they don't get flattened in your stomach. They somehow leak out into your bones and create holes in your bones. What's the logic with the bad for bone density? There's no possible way that's true. Paul won't even say anything about that. I don't have an opinion.

I'm just thinking about soda stream. Hate fucking hate soda stream. You know, it's nice in the office though. I think a situation where you have to work for yourselves or it's not nice. I think what's nice is to open a cooler. Oh, you can get like a machine, but you just, you flip a spigot and you can drink a gallon.

Is it cold, very cold? Oh, it's so cold. So it's in the wall? Yeah, it's okay. And industrial strength, soda strength. Oh yeah, I feel that's an essential part of it in the air city enterprise. I didn't know that those were essential part of the idea of city enterprise. I didn't know that those were having those at the outline.

No. Oh boy. No, we're all of your employees should raise the same thing. What's known as a startup? Yeah. Maybe you've heard a couple thousand dollars for everyone that just feel a lot of life tough. That's going to be tough to manage.

Yeah. Anyhow, Paul, it's great to have you back. We're going to be here. We're going to be right back up with topics that you want to discuss. We're, of course, in election season. It's another. Yeah, you wanted this one. Presidential election. Let's do it. Let's go. All was like, we got to talk about Hillary's brain tumor and neuro neurological disease that I read about undrugged. I'm actually fast. Judges headline

today, Hillary will she survive? What's the headline? Here's the thing, right? Like that video, first of all, the everyone's been kind of after the media lily for just being garbage, and which is fair, and they got that video of Hillary stumbling, and it's just ridiculous. They can't control themselves. No, they get that to do this. The media cannot stop asking questions that don't make any sense. No, and then like, have not understanding the have you see that even you see that video

actually associated when you saw that video on YouTube you could imagine the cable news rail table that they were going to assemble I mean several people at CNN ruined their pants oh yeah all in tandem it was like a whole room full of executives it's like a 13 year old funny is uncle's hard porn staff it really it really is. It really is. Oh my God. It's a treat and a danger. No, I mean, it's fucking disgusting.

I mean, it really is. Like, you know, and like, there's this interview I think was on CNBC was so. There's no empathy really here. Yeah. And today, the guy intervening was like, well, you've got a much harder campaign schedule. So, you know, it's like really,

and guys, like what is happening? No, no, no, there's no empathy too. really, and guys, like what is happening? No, no, you're so empathy, too. Like, a lady in her late 60s faints, and everyone's like, oh, it's a conspiracy. She definitely has several brain tumors. But if he had twisted an ankle and still went to a campaign event, people would be like, wow, what a fucking hero.

Look at him, he showed up. I mean, I'm like, it's the weird thing about Trump, is that like in New York, in like coast media, it's like, okay, this guy is a diabolical piece of shit. But you saw on this Miss Matt Lauer thing, in the rest of the world, in the media world, in this world of CNN, Trump is a relatively reasonable and viable candidate.

It's a personality. It's just a guy, he's just a guy who wants to, he's seeing what's going on out there, trying to help Americans. It's a man with an opinion. I mean, the dissonance and the disconnect that the media creates to get people to watch their shit. And I do mean mainstream.

We're talking large about mainstream media. So that's really cool. That's really great. The false, and also this kind of false like false equivalent. Here's what I want to talk about before we do anything more along nosy. Yeah, let's just down there. Let's start with our. So no, but what happens, whatever, there's a major political like injury or vomiting or whatever, then it's like Memorial T-shirt show up PR people start going like when George Bush vomited.

Someone trained in 1992, they've seen someone trained a monkey to protect the moment. This is like 1992 is ancient. I mean, everybody was saying, but it's just nine, it's nine, nine 12, right? Is that the date now? Yeah. Yesterday was 9.11.

And then people were like, imagine if you were born in 2000, you were 16 or whatever. And I'm like, whoa, you know, maybe you don't even remember a time before 9.11 How does time work that you know 92 might as well be at 18 92 it's 24 years ago you're talking about does anybody even remember there was another bush but even back No, no, it was that even back then like a vomiting president created a whole

Stat of responses. Yeah for furt, there was like a day of news. No, no, and then Japan, it was like more than news. Well, of course, Japan, it was wonderful. Yeah, that was on your turf. It's actually a fetish film. What happened, anyhow? Would he get food poisoning or something? He just wasn't feeling so good and he threw off.

Yeah. The harbor was like, here, let me help you. Yeah, I think that was a scary moment, you know? It was a... It was just a big deal in the... I think Ronald Reagan had his colon investigated at one point I hope so different when people couldn't make a memes out of that where it was like colon colon colon I'm gonna imagine can you imagine? Oh, if today a president vomiting on camera There would be no I'm just a fucking desperate that we all are. There would be no other news for several weeks.

Everything. Like, for a channel, it would go under, it'd be like, like that's it. Barack Obama sneezes at the top of Reddit for seven years. Can you imagine, you mean, makes a hidden signal to his Kenyan muslim brother? No, it's a desert faces transforming back from it. Imagine if Barack Obama had a, like, I mean, you know, if you hear about this colonoscopy, can you imagine blowing his nose and public and what would happen?

Yeah. I mean, can you imagine? Can you imagine? And that's not just like, he's never blown his nose and public as far as we know, as he has a Donald Trump is just like walking with a fake tan and his airs falling out. Donald Trump is the, is let me tell you saying, but Donald Trump, he is an incredible health.. Don't show up. Don't show up. Let me tell you something, but Donald Trump.

He is an incredible health. He is in perfect health. He is probably the healthiest person. So this is a witch doctor. There's all the blood. I think he's doing great. He really is. It's hard to argue with that.

He's never fallen down getting anyone as we've seen. I mean, he's, well, I mean, he's unaflected by several neurological disorders that are making him unfit to lead unlike Hillary. I think what's bad is that we're in the zone of like, all culture is now hyper viral. Yeah.

And I don't think this will, I think it is kind of the new normal, but it's not going to sustain, you know, we'll hit the election and then it will kind of calm down like he can't. I think it will, I think it will calm down as well. And in fact, I'm betting on it. Well, you can't sustain this. No, I don't think this is how humans are supposed to live.

No, I stay up like heightened agitation every day where you're like, oh, what's going on in 538? What's going on in 538? Yeah, no, it's, I would say that we, the modern technology has turned what is already in excruciating cycle, the election, the presidential election cycle in America into some kind of truly perverse.

You know what, too? We saw it coming and there was like no one at Twitter, as far as I know, like nothing we've ever heard of. I don't think they've seen a lot coming at Twitter. No, I mean, but they didn't sit there and go like, wow, this is obviously gonna be a complete disaster. Like we need to make some product decisions. We need to help people get through this year of pure,

like we're gonna just... Cleaning paint. We're gonna make, we're gonna reduce the noise. We're gonna bring the signal up to you. Yeah. We're gonna make sure you're not getting harassed because he does give me a lot of polarizing opinions out there.

And then we know that people just really misbehaved on the surface and they're like non-anonymous people just get punished and like they're bodily and children's, they're threatened constantly by anonymous egg people. We have got to do something under control. Because seriously, look at this. Like we're headed towards Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump. We here at Twitter have to take responsibility.

They're like, look at the current trends and for our already seen we have all this data. No, you didn't would definitely happen as a team of engineers came in. They're like, all right, we have a very important presentation. Yeah. Jack Dorsey wasn't there at this point. It was Dick Ostola, I'm sure. And they're like, they're like, look, it's a, yeah, this is a tragic and epic problem

that we have to take, you know, we deal with head on. And somebody else is like, well, we're doing this partnership with the NFL. You know, here's the thing. Yeah, we really could kill a lot of our user base. We're gonna be kind of a hundred million people. Yeah, we're doing this thing with the NFL right now. We've promised, we could do moments.

We could do moments. We could do moments. We could do moments. We could do moments. We could divert their attention. Why you and I tweeted about this the other day, it was like, I'm not gonna, I don't hate to repeat my tweet. No, please, please. Why would you say your tweets? I would say your tweets.

It's a good podcast. Let me get my Twitter out right now. Yeah. No, but it was something like, you know, it's about, you know, it's like, oh, we can't deal with the harassment and the hate speech and it's like, what about night mode? It's like, yeah, I can't do. And it's like, it's like, well, night mode? It's like, yeah, I can't do. And it's like, it's like, well, night mode,

it's like, but it's darker now. It's harder to see the harassment when you think about. Anyhow, it's a fucking nightmare. Twitter hasn't helped, but luckily Twitter is actually not even an important social network. Basically, the user numbers were hearing. No, one of the way it's gonna manage all the harassment is simply by dying.

I think that, but I think it's like, this election cycle is making, it definitely is creating a feeling for me that it's like a play, there are places I don't wanna go anymore. Oh, without a doubt. I don't wanna put CNN on anymore. I don't wanna look at Twitter.

I think the entire state of West Virginia is in there. I think the thing is, Twitter, it's a wonderful platform for speaking your mind until you see, really? I see everybody speaking their mind and you're like, wait, this is not wonderful. This is actually horrible. It's actually when it's like a bunch of tech nerds who are like, what's the story, what the if? That's by the way I talk when I'm doing the tweets.

I get that voice. You know, remember when you used to be able to, you get in, you just, you get in there, you ping and kneel. Yeah, I was the entire, no, but there was this basic attitude in life that everyone kind of pretended to share, which is just like, you know, I love everybody. Yeah, I'm pretty good at it.

No haters, BuzzFeed, no haters. Yeah, I get a lot of everybody. And now you're just like, wow, holy crap, this is bad. I mean, I love that person. The truth is, we've holy crap, this is bad. I mean, I can't love that person. The truth is we've gotta look, we have a big country. Some have argued that it shouldn't even be a country. So I've argued it should be a set of smaller countries. All the war with one another.

That or else California should break off and become a libertarian state. I don't wanna say California's the least of our problems. I mean, really, I know. Let's get right down to it. What are our problems? I don't worry about, I don't worry our problems. I mean, really, I know. Let's get right down to it. I don't worry about that. DC culture, that's our problem. Yeah, this is what Ryan just said is,

people who can't speak their mind, you know, we live in a country where you can't just, can't just speak your mind and say what's on your mind and what you're thinking, you know. I don't wanna live in that kind of country. No, no, it's not. I wanna live in a country where you can say whatever you want, to whomever you want,

whenever you want. I wanna yell fire in every theater I go into and get respectful. People say free speech should have limits and I say the only limit should be if you don't wanna do the national anthem, that's the only limit. If you oppose the national anthem, you can go to fucking hell.

But if you wanna actually threaten somebody's life and their children, that should be protected speech. Oh, that's good speech. That's fine. That's that's the freest and most important. Most raises thing you could do is not sing a song. The most recent. Let me tell you what's on American, not fucking put in your hand over your heart,

or whatever it is you do for national anthem, insane those sacred words that omit a very important verse I'm told about extreme racism and violence. You know, it's almost as if the entire history of America has this sort of subtext of extreme racism and violence. You know, here's the thing, this is all upbeat stuff. But what we're really talking about is who's gonna win this crazy election? And let's go get a dime. What? Jill's died. Wait, what? we haven't talked about iPhone 7. We're gonna talk about iPhone 7.

Yo, we should do. Take a quick break. We're gonna regroup. A lot of stuff happened in the past 22 or so minutes. I don't know the exact time, but it feels like that. It's the exact time. That's the whole of the exact time. And we're gonna be back with more Paul Ford. If you're looking for a professional vector design app, you should take a look at Autodesk Graphic.

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for to make your iPad Pro the device you use for design work you normally leave to your desktop. It's the last 2D design app you'll ever need and it's available for the price of a few decent stock photos. Visit graphic.com to learn more about Autodesk Graphic, check it out in the App Store. We're back with Paul Ford. We just had a very long and strange conversation about American politics, which I'm sure we're gonna return to. But then Paul reminded me that the iPhone 7 came out. I mean, where have you been? Came out last week.

I was in Seattle when it was, I, this is legit. I really did forget I woke up and I was working and I was like, oh wait, they're announcing an iPhone. You've moved on. I mean, I haven't moved on, but I think that there are more important stories in technology.

You know, I mean, that's, that is the reality. There are way, way more interesting and important stories than like, what is the new camera like on the iPhone? Well, it's just, it's, I will tell you about Samsung, too. We have to talk about Samsung. The whole thing is kind of weird.

This is red meat. I just want to say, red meat, if you've listened to any of my podcasts. Yeah. No, I mean, first of all, we got, Johnny I have kind of going off, like just way off the deep end, in that he now basically recites

the entire periodic table elements. Oh, wow, wow, like, yeah, for a aluminum. And then, and then something just rotates. There's always something like, like can you imagine going to this house? Yeah, just put the thing down, we let it alone for a second. Now can you imagine like him trying to get toast

in the toaster as it spins and space like a whole. You go to Johnny I's house like everyone is there so it is the everything one of those days. Like the lawnmower man can trap you. And you can't pour. So you can't pour. I tried to get the, you know, just get the, yeah. Now he's trying to pour box wine

into one of his spinning wine glasses and it's going all over the floor. Now I know it's like, it's like in the liquid, the liquid everywhere. I love many. It's all pouring and seeping and going in. I don't know. It's like the worst children's book,

it's just this very silver bear that won't love. I mean, also, I'm not in, I'm sorry, I don't give a fuck about Apple's materials at this point unless they're like, it is the T1. It's like, it's the T1, you know the T1 value from Terminator 2, that's what we made the new phone out of it. Until the thing can like morph into a face

and reach out at me, like I just, I just think it's a remake, it's aluminum, it's like this glass has been blessed by seven like rabbis and pretty much disappointed. No, they're in there, in there, I think find the materials so, here's what's up. We're in a relationship with Appleware, like everyone got married in there, I think find the materials so here's one of those points. We're in a relationship with Appleware,

like everyone got married in 2006. It was like, this may be, this is the greatest marriage that ever happened. And now we're like 10 years in. And we're like, I got a super model. Boy, yeah, super model here. Yeah, but she still has the same. She's also super smart.

And she's still has the same. The same guy, straight guys talking. Right, and you're just like, wow, there's been like five years in, you're like, god, it's, you're some weird and testin' like, it's like, yeah, it's like you're, you still look good.

Yeah, and then you're like, we'll look like smart. Here's the thing, and then you have a kid. It's so bad, I think for us, this is a bad analogy. And for two married medicine and the analogy of like, oh, you're just that marriage Or anyways, being a Trump

Neither one of our was will ever listen to this freaking thing. I don't think it's I think it's I think it's definitely true that There's no chance in Laura ever even considers listening to this if I is if I like If she's for to be on an episode. Yeah, I'm like do an episode and she's like fine And then just checks to see if her voice sounds like that. Now Mo would listen to this roller ice. I mean, because you and I are not, we're not sexist at all. We only, we're going on a good place.

I'm a sexist guy. We only want sexist. Sexist? Sexist. No, you, yeah. Anyhow, so yeah, so the material's just early, whatever. I mean, make it out of marble or something crazy, you know? Wood, if Apple used wood. I'm telling, you know, would if Apple used one.

I'm telling you that just, you gotta just admit that. Vote the wood in aluminium. We're just married now and it's just gonna go on for another 20, 30 years and it's never been out of this. I'm getting out of this really shit or something. Don't, you get divorced just because like, it's not exciting like you used to be. No, honestly, I'll be honest with you.

There's only one reason I'm hanging on at this point because it doesn't explode. No, it's fucking eye message, is it? That's it. Message is, everybody has message, everybody's using it now. And it's like, it's like a BBM trap. It's the only reason.

I'm like, there's no other reason. I have three years on Android. It's fine. I mean, I'm getting a note seven as soon as they don't blow up. It's a good, I have a good note. I honestly, I'll be honest with you. I was gonna buy one. I was like, I'll be gonna buy one.

Does not blow up. I was gonna buy one. I was like, I'm gonna buy one. Does not blow up. I was gonna buy one. I was actually looking actively, very actively for one. Couldn't find the black one in any stores. I'm gonna say this is crazy. And then literally people are like, oh my house blew up because, and I'm like, wow, I really legitimately dodged a bullet here.

It's an amazing feature though. Like it's from now on, it does not explode. I feel, I can't help but feel a little bad for anybody who has a product. They're like, this is it. The ultimate expression of everything we've ever done in this space and a week later, people are like, that burnt my house down. Well, I know.

And so we're issuing a recall and it's like, and then Apple's like, have you seen the new iPhone? It's like all at once. It's like perfect. I mean, it's almost so perfect that you just have to wonder. You just have to ask yourself.

So much of capitalism is a vast comparison. I mean, it's almost so perfect that you just have to wonder. You just have to ask yourself. So, almost a capitalism is a vast conspiracy. I mean, let's just say Apple's a very powerful company. Very powerful. They've got people in a lot of places. Imagine that supply chain wouldn't take a little time. I mean, the supply chain, they got their hands in it,

all over the place. Well, on this is pure speculation. We're not saying anything, we're not saying anything. We're not saying it. We're not saying anything. We're not saying anything. We're not saying anything. We're not saying anything. We're not saying anything. We're not saying anything.

We're not saying anything. We're not saying anything. We're not saying anything. We're not saying anything. We're not saying anything. We're not saying anything. We're not saying anything. We're not saying anything.

We're not saying anything. We're not saying anything. We're not saying anything. We're not saying anything. We're not saying anything. We're not saying anything. We're not saying anything. We're not saying anything. We're not saying anything. We're not saying anything. We're not saying anything. We're not saying anything. I was like PR person, recently on Twitter that Samson makes suits, called Galaxy Suites and they do,

they actually do man suits. It's an unbelievable company. In Korea, here's the thing, in Korea, Samsung is the infrastructure of Korea. It is like the company in Korea. Like they had a scandal a few years ago about the family that owns the, that owns Samsung and people were like burning family members

in effigy, their riots. Like factory workers were like riding in the streets and burning like the company men members in effigy, like riots, like factory workers and we're like rioting in the streets and burning like the company men in like effigy, which is not something that happens for most companies. No, not even in red. I don't think we ever burned them in effigy. I think we had some guys in suits sitting

on like a stack of money or something. Yeah, a lot of that. Like a lot of that. But nobody's doing a Wells Fargo riot. I'm curious, and he's really, maybe if you go to subprime mortgage or something, I suppose it's possible. You're having a bad day.

Anyhow, so yeah, the iPhone 7, you get anyone, Jordan one? What do you have? You have an iPhone. I have a six. I have a six plus. You know, it's, there's not a lot of motivation. It's nice, it's a beautiful, brilliant piece

of engineering. I guess so, I felt nothing. I don't care. It's just that every day, we live in every day of Jamaica because it's a little boring. I mean, headphone jack, what you're feeling on that? I mean, who cares? It's a consumer product.

People will buy or not buy it. Yeah. I mean, I'm just, I'm like, oh my God, they took away my head. It's hard to spend any time complaining about it. Everyone got so bored of complaining. Everybody's always doing doing the complaining for so long now, you're like,

I mean, it's like, shut the fuck up. Here's the Twitter cycle right on this. You're the guys who are like, you know, apples, like, they're not gonna sell this for over five, and nobody's gonna buy 500 dollar phone. It's like, well, you were just so stupidly wrong. You just know they're gonna have some stupid Twitter bone mo about the headphones

There's either you're either it's either gonna work or it isn't and my gut tells me it's probably gonna work The product that those headphones does remote headphones that only have five hours of battery life I do enjoy apples like sliding that battery life into the minute that I need just and Five hours of battery life That's not good you only need to be about five hours of battery life. It's tremendous. That's not good. You only need, you only need about five hours on your device.

That's about right. That's as much as most people who use Apple products work. I will say this, Adrian Jeffries, one of my editors at the outline, have bought the new one. Also an independent human being in her own right. Also, yeah, I'm just mentioning this. No, I mean, she is someone.

She is a person, yeah, definitely. She is a free person in America. Well, I mean, it's tricky. She bought one of the new, the MacBooks that just has the USB-C, you know, and she's got this dumb dongle. That's like for like USB and for headphones and for something else or like whatever. It's like I looked at it today. I gotta say I thought it'd be post-ongled by now.

We're now like generating more dog. I gotta tell you, I don't believe that like this move is like the first step to our wireless future. I think it's the first step to our future where we have more wires because like especially if you're a person who bought a pretty nice pair of ear buds, like a lot of people I know buy like $200 or $150 ear buds, they're like, I want audio file quality sound from my phone. I just know a lot of music on it. They're not going to be like, oh, you know, fuck that. I'll take these earbuds that definitely will slide out of your ear. Like Apple. Apple earbuds will not stay in my ears. They won't put a little silicone thing on them.

They refuse to just give you the little adaptor to stick it in your ear. I have huge ear holes. I know. They're more of a... I've got ear holes, cavernous ear holes. Drive a car from once. You can just put your hand all the way through my head. And so Apple's ear earbuds or whatever the fuck they're called are slipping right out of there.

If it's a, if it's into the sewer, into a grate. Well, we're gonna have to zap it. You know, you're in a dongle shoe, you're having out the curb, you're listening to the new Drake Kanye Colabo. Yeah, it's a dongle future. You know, your body shakes a little bit. The thing druss lies out of your ear hole, drops into through sewer grate, And then a New York City rat takes it. Pizza Rat earbud rat earbud rat and then your video goes viral on. But it looks gorgeous. It looks gorgeous. It looks like the shick is viral on

uprox and cheddar and whoever else is doing. There was a verge article. I don't know if you've seen that say it's about. It's about Apple materials. The verge.com. Yeah. And so they, they an article about how these $36 headphones were just the best headphones ever. Which one? Oh, I saw that article. Yeah, yeah. They were like one week before the event.

So you should buy these right now. It's like, should you? Should you? It's like $30, even $36 would be a. And then I went in Google the headphones, and of course, there's immediately an article that's like, that is the most hyperbolic and saying article ever.

And then you're down the earbud hole. Yeah, wow. Yeah. Down the ear hole. The earbud hole is the huge earbud hole. You're down the ear hole. So what is it, so what was the truth of it? You know, we'll never really know.

Here's the deal. Audio, some things do sound bad, like almost all beats headphones. In fact, I'll say all beats headphones. I've never heard anything good come out of beats. So they all sound real bad, but some things do sound good than aren't expensive, but then a lot of things also sound bad that are. You know, there's a funny valley in there too, where it's like,

if you pay probably like a hundred and funny valley. Yeah, the funny valley. That's like a uncanny valley. Yeah, it's like a little, it's more. It's more. You've got thousand cats in it. It's pretty cool. The, no, it's, you spend like a spend like $150 on something and you're like,

this is really nice. This is fine. And then you can get up to like 300 and you're like, probably going too far. And then after that, you're just an asshole. We did cover a year ago of a high-end audio show and I think it's in Hamburg, of course. Yeah. And it's, you Hamburg, of course. Yeah. And it's, you know, that's like nothing.

I mean, there are headphones that are like $12,000 or $10,000 headphones. Yeah. You're talking about, you know, like a couple hundred bucks is nothing to the people. No, these people are looking for something different. The gold plate and whatever, guys. But, um, and they make them say they are guys.

There are no, no, there are no. Have you ever heard from, I mean, I suppose, I'm not trying to be sexist, but I'm just saying, have you ever heard of this? This is female audio file. This is something to do with dick size that women don't do. Right? This is a particular way of saying it.

Like you never hear women go like, oh, each headphone is made from a different, you know, species of tarot pen. Yeah, yeah. That's not a tarot pen, of course, is a turtle. That's right. Yeah. That's good. By the way, great, yeah, that's not a tarot pen, of course, is a turtle. That's right. Yeah. Yeah. It's good. By the way, great, grateful, dead record,

tarot pen station, the only one that I will listen to, in fact, and I recommend it. Cool. That's one too many good old turtle station. Not a big dead fan for several reasons. I mean, who is anymore? Well, I mean, it's there, you know, like lost in the sands of time, like, actually, leafening. Like the headphone jack. Like the headphone jack and also George H.W. Bush. Yeah, Leaf and Hington talks a lot about the Grateful Dead of Leaf and Hington. Yeah, one of you.

Another one doesn't hurt. Delicently, if it ain't. Another one of your employees. She, it's impossible to tell, if Leaf and Hington's everything. Also another free human. Another free regular person, but also. Oh, I take everything she says exactly at Facebook.

Also works at the outline. Let's talk movies for a second. All right, let's talk about it. Is there anything else that's talked about with Apple? I mean, this is what I'll do. I mean, whether it's the watch. Oh, the watch. Oh, where they doubled down on the watch.

I love the watch. I love when people talk about the watch. I love when people talk about how the watch was such a success, because it sold, it was the second highest grossing watch after Rolex which is like uh... after this watch you know it's like your apple i mean the scale is all fucked up like yeah you sold a bunch of these but everybody hates them yeah everybody hates them i've never met a person who likes their watch i really have it.

Nobody likes your, you're like, getting high on average with a lot. I mean, I've never met anyone who, I mean, I've met lots of people who are like, yeah, it's okay. Yeah, yeah, but nobody loves it. No. And a lot of people hate it.

I mean, I've been wearing it and then I started wearing it again and then I, it's so annoying. I had to take it off, it's so annoying. And I gotta say, I don't miss it. I miss one feature checking the weather on my wrist, and frankly, I don't miss it that much. But, and then Laura got one. I'm like, you should get one, I was wearing it

for a few weeks, I'll say you should get one. And she hates it. She stopped wearing it basically. Are you wearing yours, Ryan? Yeah, I love it. You can say if you do love it. No, I use it for fitness stuff, which is fine. You can use it for notifications.

My boyfriend really, really, really, really wants, he talks about how he's gonna get one of them. You always want one. That's the thing, as I said, you could use mine for a week and you won't feel the way you are. You always want one, because this is how capitalism, consumerism really works, right? You, I want all the stuff.

But then it's like, it's never, one of the things I've learned now because I've had every phone in the world, they won't make you happy. They won't make your life better. That's really surprising. I actually always figured the material. They do.

They won't pay the $1,000. You know, the one thing I always think about the new phones or the new, whatever, is like, oh, this is gonna be, I'm gonna be so much more productive and get my so much more shit done. And it's really gonna, like, at this point, we just hit such a parody.

But I feel like, isn't there stuff like, isn't there stuff like, like, water proof was the one thing where I was like, well, that would save my ass a few times. Years ago, I said they should make a waterproof phone. Oh, those you. No, I'm just saying, it was one of those things where it's like, they're like, no,

it was like, they're doing these very impractical things. Yeah. Apple loves to do impractical things. Yeah. Apple loves to do impractical things that they think, like, you know, the live photos features, like you get the fuck out of my face that your stupid wanna be getting. It's not too damn much work anyway. Like, I want to, I still can't like,

easily put a movie on my phone that I've pirated. And you have to like, go on to that. I mean, forget about that. I can't even, forget about that. It's still like a pain in the ass to download a PDF and then send it to somebody. Okay, so PDFs, I'm convinced that a PDF is like this infinite goal for every platform

because no matter what you do, you can never, that's okay on Android, you can, it's easy. You have a file system, you can put it somewhere. It's okay, no, it's not even that. It's not even that. But it's just then you open the PDF and try to read it. And it's like, it's like,

it's like being in a fucking slip and slide. Anything that's in PDF form shouldn't be read on a phone I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I Yeah. Am I wrong or am I right? Well, it is. It's a pretty good open standard at this point. I mean, it's just. Well, not good enough for Apple. No, because preview completely supports it. It's an Apple. It supports it, but don't you feel like that you can have it away?

It's like JPEG. I mean, it's just not that big a deal. Really? Yeah. Well, I think Apple's working on new PDF standard. No, I think it's the last thing we care about. Like, 80F? I think literally no one cares about

eighty-year verse why just why do we need to have a fake version of a piece of paper like why does that need to exist anymore why do i have fake form i guess for a guy who doesn't have a lot of legal documents you don't know but i can tell you as a man who's done a lot of legal uh... document signing recently there a lot of fucking people who need things that emulate paper. ADF is actually short for a meaghan disc format

for meaghan simulation fans. The best format. You can play all of the, you can play all of the, you have docu-sign some shit in the last day. I have been, I fucking love docu-sign. I docu-sign all the time, man. I'm not promoting, I'm not, they're not sponsored, but if they want to be, I definitely will big up their product.

You know, who owns the Occupy side? I don't know. I think it's Adobe. It's a Dobie. It's crushing it. The crushing. Because in the PDF-based workflow world, Adobe is still the winner. You know, did I maybe set this on an earlier podcast, but I started saying crushing it as a joke

because really funny people say crushing it. Like people that are hilarious to me. And now I say it. Now I say it. It people that are, and people that are hilarious to me. You're part of the process. And now I say it. No, no, no, it's a passion. It's funny. This is a pattern with you thing. Big bang theory, cruise missile,

oh, this stuff starts a little ironic though. Oh, you mean my love of Tom Cruise? Definitely started ironically. Yeah, it might be a problem where I say, way from irony to reality. It happens to all of us. Doesn't? Yeah, no.

What's the last thing you liked ironically and it became a thing you actually liked? Or did I really like it? I can't pop that out on my brain. I remember in college, I mean, fun and synatra all the time. And then I got like a synatra album for 25 cents. And then it was like eight years later. I'm just like, once I was, I mean just,

synatra is timeless. Oh yeah, he's good. Nobody said people don't know who's in Autras, but who cares? Because you know, onward. Come on, everybody knows Sinatra. I don't think so. Even children.

I don't think so. I think, listen, that stuff's the past. It's a Michael Booblay world. You know, Booblay is over. Nobody cares about Booblay. The, you know, I just want to get back to politics for a second. You just, you just hardcore Booblay dissed it. You know, say it way get back to politics for a second. You just hardcore, boolay, diss, and then I go segue right back into politics. One of the things we were talking about is that we were joking about it.

Hillary is like, there's this rumor that Hillary has some neurological disorder. There's this thing started by, I don't know what heinous group started this rumor That Hillary has some sort of like debilitating disease because like They don't know like what expressions look like or something, right? But there is this this thread that runs through all of our political discourse now and I see it like more and more Which is this very strange concept. And you know, partially it's the internet, partially it's like, you know,

I just kind of was thinking about this on the 9-11 anniversary. This concept of like false flag and 9-11 being an inside job. That's like Reddit's favorite. This like, yeah, the Reddit, I mean, I think, you know, Fort Chan and like. You know, I saw the other day, I saw this really like, goofy screenshot from Tumblr. And it was, from people complaining,

it was someone identifying as age kin, meaning that like other kin or furries, they get to identify themselves as having, like being 200 years old. Okay. Okay, so this person's identifying as age kid and like it was kind of joking and it's this guy like bearded chubby dude and I'm like, hmm. And he's like, oh, you know, my father came and told me I needed to grow up.

But little did he know that I'm actually four times his age. Oh, my summer child. That's what this is. So this is a, this is like a strain of like role play? Yeah, well no, but you know how people believe their dragons know that's a thing. No, is that true? Oh, they're kin, yeah.

They believe that they are in their physical makeup. This is like 16 years old. It's not, it's- Yeah, this is relatively new to me, so they- No, they don't find it as a Tumblr for no, no, it's actually much older. So wait, so I'm like, this is relatively new to me. So they don't find it as a Tumblr for now, no, it's actually much older. So wait, so I'm like, this is suspicious. So I went and looked it up and immediately found on Reddit

that someone had been like, hey, let's troll Tumblr and come up with a concept of age kin and see who we can outrage. Right. So it's like, so it became, well, this is like the horrible, this is like the harambe thing where it's like false flag operations all around. I just think where they like to point out,

that community likes to point out, false flags everywhere they can, but they themselves are the false flag creators. But this is, okay, so there's that, there's the strain of like the bullshit that comes from the internet, but there's also this strain, but that has created, it hits like broken,

and listen, some of it's broken because of reality, but some of it's broken, most of it's broken. We've broken like the sort of like sensitive region of belief in facts, in like that, that like there are, no, there are facts. Well, it's starting to get mainstreamed in a new way. No, both the alt-right being brought into the mainstream allows has allowed. I mean, Hillary's, I mean, actually in some ways, Hillary's use of the term alt-right has probably done more damage than good in a lot of ways because it's actually good

to name that thing. I know it's good to name them, but they should be called something that sounds less like a reasonable group. They should be called like, you know, like a bunch of racists or like, you know, people who, like, just like, secessionists or neo-nautsis or, I mean, neo-nautsis should be a fine. I don't know. I would just call them modern Republicans to see that. Well, I mean, the thing, okay, but any of us should own it. But, but, but like partially like, Romney's children.

I mean, partially, Romney's children. I mean partially. She's a romney's children. And he romney seems like a real reasonable and mellow guy about to be able to. Yeah, it's amazing. You know who Father Cofflin was, the great, like not great, but like the famous anti-Semitic preacher from the 30s. No, but I like the sounds of this.

Okay, so he was like a coaglin. Kind of like this Irish anti-Semite and priest, and he got on the radio and he would sort of, he started kind of liberal and he would sort of, he started kind of liberal and a big Roosevelt fan and then he kind of slowly went like hardcore anti-Semitism as we were edging in the World War II. So bad time for that.

And I wasn't listening. I was eight off guy, has a few. It's nice. It's a little brown shirty and I went and listened to him not so long, he's boring as hell. From the 30, honestly, he just sounds so reasonable. You're just like, oh wow, this is what people were freaked out about this.

Yeah. And he's just sort of like, now let's question the Jews. Which today just feels like, you know, that's normal. I mean, there's few subjects you can't, like, I don't know where Alex Jones comes in on Judaism. Jews? I don't know if where Alex Jones comes in on the on Judy is I don't know. Do we know can we get a can we get Alex Jones's position on Jews? I gotta imagine that see that that's the new conspiratorial stuff like there's no Well, there are a lot of there a lot of I've noticed there seem to be a lot of alt-right people who are like

Ju like Jewish There are some alt-right Jews that are like and a different are some alt-right Jews that are like, and a different not the alt-right, like Jones' wife is Jewish. Oh my God, I see. And the internet calls him a Zionist shill. Yeah, there you go, but today. But today, so there's a little bit of a war in the world. So there's a little bit of war in the world.

It's like in the ex files how like there's aliens, and then you're like, oh my God, there's aliens. It's so much fucking work just to hate people. But then, yeah, yeah, actually. But then they're like, you're like, oh no week, there's another group of aliens and they're fighting with each other. And we're just caught in the crossfire.

Love is so much lazier. Why the hell can't be? I mean, it's actually just easier to just be like, yeah, I hope that guy does okay for himself. And you just literally, well, you know, we're so, not according to Morrissey's love, Ezio, you'll recall the great,

I feel like, but Ezif, kind of, it's so easy to laugh, it's so easy to hate. It takes strength to be gentle and kind, which I do agree is true. Now, he is actually the currently the president of Mexico with his current.

I see. Morris is finally taking a position that he could, I mean, why not? The current president seems like a complete piece of crap based on, I think Morris could win. I'm sorry, if you cannot have a, why would you take a meeting with Trump if you're the president of Mexico?

Do you ever listen to death metal? I mean, every now and then I get a little craving. And Spotify always shows you like which city it's big in. Yeah, what's it? It's Mexico City. It's a, if it's just metal. Yeah, if it's like, you know, Dorphins daughter, Eagle neck, it'll be like, or whatever nightmare,

or like triple size. It's interesting. It is always Mexico City. you know, Dorfins daughter, Eagle neck, it'll be like, or whatever nightmare, triple sigh of, it is always Mexican. I've never delved into the region situation there, but I'm gonna have to look into it. Anyhow, the podcast, and I started listening there. I just, I just, I just, been in Rodding Christ that I saw the sign for in the Grammar Seatheater.

I was just like, what do they sound like? They call Rodding Christ. They were all, I was like, why are there goths everywhere? And then I went to hear it. You wanna hear some real crazy music. I recommend a band called Necrophages. I believe they're called Necrophages. Okay.

For Necrophagia. I believe they have an album called Mutilate the Stillborn. I can be wrong. Oh yeah. Can you look that up for me? Is it Necrophages? Just search for, just Google mutilate the stillborn Which is that's a kind of stuff they get a bit too phage

Is it necrophage? I mean the first result is torture killer It's not used to be a thing too. There was a band called Anal cunt Well anal cunt. Yeah, I don't know where they fall in the spectrum of in terms of action or hardcore Yeah, I don't think they're really right They're thinking they had a song called big pants big loser though. That's a good song It's really good, but you've got all these like black metal bands. Yeah, Necrofagist is another band Which has an epitaph and onset of putrefaction. Oh, no, that's uh

I think it's onset of putrefocation. I think is actually Putrefaction. Oh, that's it. Maybe I think of a different song. They're really in the court. Oh, my God. The track listing. Let me just... Yeah, I think this might be this. Full body autopsy.

To breathe in a casket. Yeah. Mutilate the stillborn. Here we go. That's my guys. Intestinal incubation. Yeah. Culinary hyperversity.

Can we hear a little bit of... You'll put a little bit of mutilate the stillborn in so everybody can get a tape Yeah there's a whole there just part there's the tip of the iceberg for the record. Anyway, if you're in Mexico City, that's your soundtrack. I wish Magnus were here right now, no offense Ryan, but he is a metal expert. Oh, well, there's no surprise. Have you ever want to talk about Carly Ray Jepson? I'm right here.

Everything about, have you heard her metal record? It's very daring. Her new album is good, though. I'm so sick of hearing about Carly Ray Jepson. She's very talented. Well, then you're going to have to unfollow me on Twitter. My point was, never. My point was, we are in this kind of mode

where people will just, they just are like, yeah, our facts, they're really fast. Like, maybe there aren't. Maybe we don't really know. And CNN has allowed, like, play 6.10 and have allowed this to blossom. Didn't you believe in some total nonsense like in college though?

Like, it happens to all of us. I, you know, to a degree. Were you raised religious? No, I was. Were you? Oh yeah. A religion. Mainstream Protestant Presbyterianism was younger

than we were. That's not very religious. Then it can be. And then we went evangelical. And then I went to evangelical school for snake handling Speaking in tongues. No, that is the tip of cool. What about a little? It's a little more subtle than that. Oh, is it is it? Yeah, all about it. Please do want enlighten me

Well, if you're going to have a evangelical first of all you're going you're usually going unless you're going to A mega church. You're going to a much smaller church in the town. Church that's, you know, we've got the snakes. Yeah, you know, there's no snakes. You just might pray for different stuff. It's more strictly Bible-be-prey for different stuff. Like for all the gaze to be struck down, that sort of thing.

You know, it's never, see this thing. Not that specific. It's never that specific. Not felsian. No, it's not like that. It's more just sort of like, you know, we're all sinners, God's angry. You gotta kind of get that together. It's old school.

The other ones, the main. That's what it got so cool. The mainstream product. He's got the plan. Yeah, the mainstream product too. I like the, you know what I think best about God, sorry, I'm gonna let you make the whole. The only best about God is how clear-cut all of the everything is. It's all like, he put it out there. It's like, that makes sense.

You know, and if you don't understand it, it's just like you don't understand God's plan and that's okay. That's okay, you know? The whole book of Revelation so straightforward, exactly how you would expect the end of the world to go down. God wants whatever you want and will justify whatever it is you really want. I also like the Jesus thing.

Like, yeah, you know, it all makes sense. That he's the only son and the crucified and for your sins and all your absol. It all makes perfect sense. We live across history from a mosque and I had to explain. What? A mosque. Explain aid, which is the Muslim holiday that is today to my, because our kids, tell me,

tell her, listen her about it. No, I don't know what it's for. Listen, this is why everybody is dressed up. I feel like there's what it's for this is why everybody's trust is there's a holiday that is a lot of it our kids to get off for jewish christian and muslim holidays like everything a brammy york i was pretty intense york bad yeah there's nothing figuring out that child cares is bad my chile is on twitter today my child is where we're gonna holiday situation can expect to get into you know that was a thing at one point the army had the the Wiccans and the army requested

identification because you need to get like your own your own gravestone. You have to get your own. No, in in Arlington, there's like what's the Wiccans gravestone? They say they have to they assign you a covenant, I believe. No, they do not. I think if you're Wiccans, they give you a you have you get set up with a covenant, I believe. No, they do not. Yeah, I think if you're wicked, they give you a, you get set up with a covenant. There are a lot of, if you look, there's lots of power points that show,

you know, there's lots of actual wiki, wiki stuff. It's like I'm being offensive to wikens right now. They'll tell you. And they'll tell you. And they'll tell you, they'll protest and so. Listen, Evangelical. If you're lucky, they'll let you know. If it makes you feeling better,

I think all religions are bullshit. Do you? Yes. All of them are awful and should be stopped. Stopped. That's my opinion on this. So you're Jewish? Yes.

Yes. I find them annoying. No, that's my Jewish guy. He's okay. Does he drink Seltzer? Oh, he drinks Seltzer all right. And he talks about it a lot too. He has a podcast called Tomorrow.

Anyhow, so you were saying, you were talking about your Evan Jell-Glopp bringing, so the church is smaller. No, it just looks. What does that mean? There's fewer people there. Oh, yeah. Yeah, it's just, you know,

where you grow up. Outside of Philadelphia. We're getting an, oh, outside of Philadelphia, in Bucks County. No, Chester County. Not anywhere near where the sign stuff went down. Signed, they mean that, oh yeah, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I was DJing in Albuquerque and I had a day off in between gigs. And so the promoter took me to GoCM movie. We went to GoCScience and I like cried like a baby at the end of the side.

I was like, ball and it was so emotional. You know, it's also traveling. Do you remember how good he's so good at getting like true terror out of really little things? Like there's a scene where spoiler alert, if you've never seen signs. There's aliens. There's a scene where one of the aliens is just like on TV yeah like they're watching so good they see comes a like peaks out from behind the building is very I'm getting these folks just great it's just great I should say that the um now I don't know if this is true I've definitely talked about this. I'm like repeating machine. What's the point of even having a podcast?

You just listen to the old episodes. You'll just hear the same fucking stories. There's an artist named Charlie White. Have I ever talked about Charlie White? I don't know. So an artist named Charlie White, one of my favorite artists, he's a photographer. He's sort of like Gregory Kruzson, do you know Gregory Kruzson?

No. He did a series of photographs. He did a book of photographs. Well, there's a book of his photographs called Twilight. I don't know if it's a photo series, they're not very well known. They're like highly staged cinematic photography. But Charlie White did a series,

did a photo series in the late 90s called In A Matter of Days. And In A Matter of Days showed like essentially a very beautiful stylized photos of like, basically monsters attacking people. The photos are fucking awesome. Monsters attacking people in Los Angeles. And it was really like, they're really,

they're, now they look sort of like you can see the kind of like digital and fake. But at the time, they were like very cinematic and creepy because they showed this kind of like expanses in LA where like someone's like fighting this weird little monster like people waiting in a house for something to come through the door like the husband, the father's got a gun and the kids are like up against the wall.

Like yeah, that's the picture right there. This house by the way is in the OJ Mini series. This house was reused and I was like, oh my God, that's the house from Charlie White's in a matter of days. Okay. But a lot of the alien imagery in science, I believe is cribbed from in a matter of days

from this photo series. And I don't know if there's ever been any doctoral thesis. Yeah, I don't know. Maybe I could write something about it. Might be tough. Fuck. That's an outline story.

Yeah. Let's talk about the outlet. Yeah, oh, okay. Let me take that post like, what's going on over the outlet? So you know, we're just trying to make something new and good for people. Just want to make something that's good in the world, something that is smart and interesting and just interesting. How are they people are working? How biggers does and something like that.

What are they doing? I know there's just working on things, checking out some kicking the tires. What is't think that's a big deal. I don't think that's a big deal. I don't think that's a big deal. I don't think that's a big deal. I don't think that's a big deal. I don't think that's a big deal. I don't think that's a big deal. I don't think that's a big deal.

I don't think that's a big deal. I don't think that's a big deal. I don't think that's a big deal. I don't think that's a big deal. I don't think that's a big deal. I don't think that's a big deal. I don't wanna have that problem. Did you hire Meltaebi as another? Taebi's in. Good. Glenn Greenwald is joined. Oh, that is great. You guys are gonna have so much fun with Twitter.

Love Glenn, love Glenn. I think you guys have the same view of the world. We have a great shared world view, which is anybody but Hillary. Yeah. Anybody but Hillary. This will be really good. She's not gonna pretend like it's a Gilles Dine.

She's a Gilles Dine. I love Gilles Dine. She's great. Gilles Dine is the best. She's mean we got a re-investigate 9-11 and also vaccines Well, no Wi-Fi 26th No Wi-Fi. Oh, yeah, she's a cancer wave Can't you get a real good day bet no not kimchi? Not easy That's I'll be ridiculous folks. Hey, it just times anti-wifi.

Yeah, because it gives you brain surgery. Sorry, it's weird now. It's like you're over. You're like on the fence with the vaccine stuff. I'm like, you know, hey, we don't know. We don't have all the answers. This is what I'm talking about. Turn off my neck.

You don't understand. You don't understand. You know this, you have kids. Yeah. You hear this shit from people, right? The things people say about what they believe is going on. So, you know, my wife when it comes... The vaccine thing is like...

This is my wife when it comes up at the playground. Oh, that's interesting. My uncle had polio. By the time he was six, we realized he realized he would never run. Do you want your child to never be able to run? Just she confront people. Yeah, and then I... Well, if they bring it up.

I'd be like, oh, I'm... Mark kids are done on the playground now. You're kids over here. That's the thing. I'm like, hey, if they bring it up. I'd be like, oh, I'm, my kids are done on the playground now. Your kids are here. That's the thing. I'm like, hey, baby, let's go. Let's take the kids home. Let's go now. Let's go.

Don't let her once. Call her or whatever is about to happen. I know. I know. She's just like in there. She feels the vaccine stuff pretty strong. And for God's sake, for God's sake, it's so bad. Listen, you fucking idiot.

Vaccinate your fucking kids. Vaccinate your fucking kids. It's real simple. This is real simple. It's so bad. Listen, you fucking idiot. Vaccinate your fucking kids. It's real simple. This is real simple. This scene's work. And all those other studies are lies. I don't fucking are. They're just not real.

I don't care what your wizard told you. Yeah. It's like, well, my doula, and it's like, I'm sorry, you know what does it know about vaccines. Yeah, seriously. I mean, I'm all for a doula, but like, a man faced dog with no needles in the night. I'm sorry, it is really crazy.

And it's like, it's only getting worse, but the reason is, but it's, it's, it's, before Trump, it was the number one destroyer Facebook relationship. But this is, but this is why Trump has been able to like, keep going. It's like, some people are like, yeah, maybe, I don't know, I guess that's true.

Maybe the Mexicans are taking all our I know the reality is we said it we don't have all the facts. We don't know No, it's like the fucking thing with Cruz's father being involved in the JFK assassination It's like I'm not saying and this is the way What it's what's the most clickable not the most true and their whole website's dedicated to talking about your body's pH alkalinity instead of I mean the wellness movement and the mindfulness movement and the people who are like Who are like don't worry about? Oh, Josh. I say about what all the doctors say you know you know what's best. They're your kids. That's the toxins talking I know right. I got to get pumped out because he's pumped out of me

How do I get the toxins out? You know it doesn't that way you know it doesn't come up anymore. It's colonics That's about stuff I need a colonic that's not not really in the mix It sounds like a good idea. Yeah, so the one can pepper these days usually like I just get just remember cryo Freeze last year that was the thing all right. You used to freeze yourself. There's gotta be something near like just swift kick Boyle yourself Are you ever like I just think a colonic would be the right thing right now. It's like it's time.

I mean, something's wrong. Pretty much every day. Yeah, right. It does, it did make sense. But you know what I'm waiting for you next? I think Swift kick in the joke. Come somebody doesn't like it. It's a soy like.

So I mean, you need to create a soy like a colonic. Yeah. No, I have simple, it's simple. It's like an egres, yeah, you throw it out. No, I have simple, it's simple. It's like an easier, simple use. Yeah, you throw it out. You get to, obviously, throw it out, you know, but you get like, it's like the kit comes. Yeah.

It's like beautiful packaging. Like they have this toothbrush quip, same idea. It's like quip, quip, quip. It's like it's like it's like it's like an electric quip. Yeah, I have a quip that I was, I was, somebody was like, check this out. I'm an investor, check, try it out. And I was like, God's, it's too much. Yeah, we actually bought quip that I was, somebody was like, check this out, I'm an investor, check, you try it out. And I was like,

it's too much. We actually bought quip, like I just, like, what are your thoughts? I don't know, I mean, we don't have, we don't have friends who are investors and quips. And now my experience of quip is really secondary. No, I mean, it's not a friend, it was just somebody like gave it to me.

It's like here, here, here, here, try it out. And I'm like, yeah, yeah, try it. It's my brand. No, no, no, we're actually, I mean, they say, I'm not endorsing quip. I actually have, I would, there are things, here, try the, please. Try it out and I'm like, yeah, okay, that's right. That's my brand. No, no, no. We were actually, I mean, I'm not endorsing Quip. I actually have, I would, there are things that I don't like and I don't use it. So there are things I could say about it.

I'm not gonna critique it now. I'm okay with Quip. I don't like that, I don't, I couldn't get the truth, both of the truth pace, I couldn't get the tops open. Like the little plastic thing didn't, Oh, I didn't use the truth pace. Come on, well, okay, that's smart. Truth pace is also like made in Indian.

It's like, I don't understand why do you have to make the toothpaste in India? Like, I feel, just like I want my toothpaste to be made closer. You've thought more about Quip than I have. I have, well, I think about this with about, imagine my life where everything is a product review. Oh yeah. Imagine all the things in your life that you encounter

and then going like, this fork really could have, they really could have made this fork better. Does this ever happen in your relationships? Like are you just like, mean with Laura, she's perfect, there's nothing to be seen. No, I just mean in general, I mean, nothing to critique. What are you gonna have in your reviews at the outline?

No, fucking reviews, no, no 180s, no 360s. No, but it's 720, 720 reviews. We're gonna get a 720 machine. How are people gonna know how they're doing? Is it because you're calling them a little love and say great job it because you're going to get? I'm gonna say great job. I'm assuming great job guys you knocked it out of the park. Please try harder tomorrow. Okay, my My what about the other time? Here's my editorial Paul. I was not that was not good work. Here's my editorial

Here's what I think Work really hard make something great Wake up every day going like we're gonna make something great, work really hard to do it. And then you should go to bed feeling like disappointed in yourself and that you can do better tomorrow. And if you're not doing that, then you probably say, I wonder if pathology is any other way because I'm worried that way.

I'm like, well, this is nothing to be afraid of. That's just how I am. I'm not forcing other people. Here's how I feel. I'm just telling you, my editorial. I'm funny that tricky because I'm trying to be very careful to insulate other people, here's how I feel. I'm just telling you, my editorial. I'm funny that tricky because I'm trying to be very careful to insulate other people from my insane sense of constant dissatisfaction.

Don't do that. Dissatisfaction is powerful. No. You know what's good? You know what's good is to feel like you can do better. That's a very good and healthy feeling. Well, sure. To not feel satisfied, to never frankly feel satisfied

because I think that satisfaction is the mind killer. In a good world, there's somebody help you along in a path. You're not just there. No, obviously you're not demoralized people and be like, you guys suck. Now of course not. But I think there's a healthy amount of, and I like to think I'm fairly supportive,

but there's a healthy amount of feeling like, this is great, how do you make it better? It's not like you, not like you blew it. Well, that's a really tricky one, right? But this is great, how do you make it better? It's not like you, not like you blew it. Well, that's a really tricky one, right? Because people, but this is great, how can we make it better to me is like the right connection.

It's hard to talk about that, right? That because people tend to think like, oh, there's things that are happening, I should have gotten those done. As opposed to, It's vague, I don't know what that means. I mean that when you talk about issues and problems, that's true.

Yeah, well, that's it. And when you turn, I sweep today. Exactly. And you're going like, well, actually's it. Then when you turn, I sweep today. Exactly. And you're going like, well, actually, we probably need to order new brooms. No, it's actually like we swept today and the floor is pretty clean, but I think it could be a little bit cleaner tomorrow when we sweep. But Jesus Christ, how fucking clean does the floor have to be?

The floor just has to be like, you have to strive. You have to be happy and explain this. I'm not explaining this very well. You're going to be allowed to shift for it. I'm not going to shift for only want to explain this very well. The ladies have a lot of shit for it. I doubt it. No, not at all. No, but here's what I think. I think that feeling totally satisfied.

It's like feeling totally full or feeling totally hungry and not good feelings. You want to be somewhere in between and it's okay. Well, that's how you're wired. It's okay, yeah, that's how I'm wired. I'm not saying it's for everybody, but I do think that it's very healthy to think like, okay, I'm gonna make something great.

I'm gonna work my ass off, it's gonna be great. And then like, in all likelihood, now maybe sometimes I'll feel totally like I just knocked it out of the park, but I think if you start feeling that way, you're gonna blow it. I think it's like a feeling of like that you're killing it is you blowing it.

I think you get a couple of those for career. Like I've had a few, like, I knocked that out of the park. I've never felt that way. I felt that way, I felt that way when it's good. I mean, I feel pride, few like, oh, knocked that out of the park. I've never felt that way. I felt that way. I felt that way with what is good. I mean, I feel pride. I feel really pride in the moment

and like definitely like, oh, this is awesome. I knew it would be. I'm always like, in my mind, I'm always evaluating and going like, okay, here's things I would like to do and I'm waiting to get to do the, I mean, we worked on something together. So I think you have some in front of me.

Did you feel that coming off of me or was I, no, no, no, you were great, but I mean, there's a line. You're the best. There's a line. There's a line where things are done and they cross that line. And then I never think about it again. Well, being finished is not, this is not that you can't let

striving for, there's no such thing as you're not going to get perfect. You're going to get better. You can get better. Sometimes you can't ever get better because you need to finish. Finishing is very important. You need to go to like, hey, this thing is went from not a thing to a thing.

And the thing is, maybe there's like 10 things I wish it was or wish it could be, but this thing is pretty fucking good. And it needs to be done now. It's done. It's not perfect. It's like the social media version of that. Is that what people say?

Finish not perfect, which is fine, but I'm not like fuck it, ship it. People fuck it, ship it, people drive me fucking crazy. Cause that's like, just ship it. It's like, no, ship the thing, the right thing, ship the thing that's as close as possible to what you want it to be. Definitely ship, but don't say fuck it beforehand.

Anyway, watch Halton catch fire on Ams. No, thank you. I'm halted and catch you'd fire as we speak. You don't like my attitudes. No, I'm just thinking. I don't know. I don't know if it's I'm trying to fuck it. Ship it. You're a fuck it. Ship it guy. No. Okay. No. That's my dude right there. No, I'm, I mean, this is the thing. It's it's I'm learning. I don't get as much hands on as I used to. Get hands on. No. You want to do a hands-on? No, it doesn't scale. It's I'm learning I don't get as much hands on as I used to get hands on. No, you want to do a hands-on something? No, I get called I'm working on like a weird art project with a big organization

right now. I get called to do things like that. I consult. I have weird Vague humble brag. No, no, but I mean that's the project with a big organization. No, because it's trickier because I'm writing the program. It's a Coca-Cola as it relates to the genocide. Yes, definitely. It's Coca-Cola, a military genocide. It's a... No, you need a memorial to whatever genocide is called. I'll tell you, I'm converting a lot of files.

That's actually all I'm really doing. I have to write some code and get some stuff worked out. And it's like, that's my little pocket world, and it's fun for me. A pocket world. That's a good idea for something. I like to just have... Like, I need to keep my hands in. I like to just have, like, I need

to keep my hands in, I need to build and do things, but the organization that I'm the co-founder of, like, I don't want to interfere with people getting their work done with my crazy-ass ideas all the time. Yeah, that's my whole premise is I'm going to interfere. You're going to interfere constantly. Well, sort of, I think also, you look, you know, if you've got good people and I have think also, you look, you know, if you're, you've got good people and I have no doubt that you guys have hired some excellent people, then you don't have to interfere a lot. But there's a certain amount of, to me, sometimes it's like,

and I even have to stop myself, I'm like, am I just tinkering to please myself or as there something meaningful that I'm contributing. I'm trying to anti-tank her. Yeah, you don't want to tinker, but you do, but, but we're in such a larval. We're so much stuff coming together at once. Well, you're making your yeah. And it's also a singular thing. You don't make singular. You make a lot of different.

I mean, post light does lots of different stuff, right? You're all of your projects are pretty varied and you're doing a different level. We have several separate projects going right now. Right. Well, we have a project. Now, there's a bunch of pieces of it, but the project is like make this thing called the outline. The outline has a bunch of pieces that go into it,

but like ultimately it will be presented as a single thing and a single thought to people. And so, so there has to be some level from me of like full scale tinkering because otherwise. Now how do you keep it, are you reading me in the scripts? What do you do to keep an eye on what's happening? Man, you scripts. Why me, you know what I mean?

You don't wear documents. Everything, I mean, I just look at where we're talking we talk about everything. Reanslack? Of course. I mean, I don't want to admit that because that's a hack, mega hack way to happen. No, I read every channel owner. I don't I skip through the channels. I go through all the channels. I read, but I'm also in the channel. I mean, we're having it's a very interactive

like very conversation. And by the way, I hate Slack for the record. I find it to be one of the most frustrating from a design, from a user experience, and user interface. We use a system called Flodock that provides for threaded conversations. We're no longer allowed to, no one, this is a rule I said,

no one is allowed to talk about Slack in Flodock. Well, Flodock is what? It's like Slack. Oh, so it's a Slack competitor? Well, it is, but not really, because Slack is so much more successful. Do you slack? I know. I'm constantly on the hunt for a competitor to slack. You know what I said? We explored many competitors, and then finally I was like, I don't fucking have time to find, to like, self-host, whatever this thing is.

I don't know if you'd love it more. What's nice about it is it's threaded in the chat. So if you're in the like, I don't know, some rule. Oh, you mean you can have a, that's a great idea. You can start a new conversation inside of the larger conversation. I like that idea. I can't.

I'm gonna write this down. It works pretty well. Hello, any weird spellings there? No, just flow, Doc. Hello, Doc. Do I say self-hosted? Is it, are there on somebody's servers? No, it's theirs.

It's theirs. Okay, Ryan's telling me we got to wrap up. We've done 70 solid minutes of, I don't know what. Well, you know, Josh, it's always good to come in here and talk to you about all these important things. We get into real radio voice sometimes. I do. I can't tell.

No, I think both of us, you encourage a radio voice. I do. Well, I'm very close to the microphone and I like to just let myself, you know, to the tonality. Nothing wrong with that. Well, Paul, this has been a great, an edifying and highly enjoyable. No, I learned a lot. Podcasts.

And I, you know, oh, I should say. Squarespace. No, I should say this is that you are now the most frequent visitor of tomorrow. Who else is in the running? I don't know. I mean, Michael Shannon was on twice. Michael Shannon made.

Ryan was on twice. Laura was on twice, I think. You could tell people nearby. I'm like, I don't know, I don't know. We don't have a guest this week. Would you like to join us? You're like four blocks away. You're very literally in the house with me.

Yeah. That has definitely happened. You know, look, it's been a chaotic, it's been a chaotic time. It's busy time. The tomorrow time has been like all, a lot of it in the background. I have been like, well,

oh yeah, you can't put a entrepreneurial leadership on a schedule. You, you got damn right, you can't, Paul, thank you for making every life choice of mine make sense. For real. Like you can't, Paul, thank you for making every life choice of mine makes sense. For real. Like you can't, an editorial vision doesn't, you just don't wake up with that. You don't wake up, well, actually, that is usually what happens is you wake up with it.

Anyhow, we, so, hey, so any post light plugs before we wrap up? You know, check us out at HTTPS. Cool and slash. Very secure. Chris Latka, we are a product studio. We do work for places like Time Inc. We do our own work. We're doing all sorts of stuff around media and new products on your phone.

So we're looking for people to come work with us and we're looking for clients to check us out. If you're a person who has a little bit corporate account and is ready to get into deep and meaningful development experience, just let us know what's bugging. Postlight.com. Check it out on the internet. Drific stuff.

Well, that's our show. That's Paul Ford. Thank you, Paul, so much for being here. Josh, I love you. I love you, too. This has been a tremendous episode. One of our best ever, I think. You know, one day we got it all again.

Sit down and talk about frozen. Oh, we do. We do a whole frozen frozen round episode. Who else would be in that? Jean Interpone has a lot of. Oh, really? Yeah. We were just talking about, I just had a conversation about the next frozen, which I'm

eagerly interested. I know. I mean, I am dying to see that universe expand. It's a source of relief over. I mean, they better not screw it that universe expect it's a source of relief They better not screw it up. No, especially when a whole off goes dark. I mean all off goes on a Kill crazy rampage It's dark stuff anyhow. All right Paul. Thank you so much, and you've got to come back. Okay, mate Well, that was our show for this week We we'll be back next week with more tomorrow, and as always, I wish you and your family the very best.

But unfortunately, they've all been drinking a lot of selter, and now they're all like Mr. Glass, the villain from M. Knight Shomalins, underrated, but still deeply loved, unbreakable. Thank you.