Tomorrow - Episode 78: Emily Altman Plays the Game

Episode Date: November 15, 2016

Here we are at the end of the world with Emily Altman, a UCB comedian and Emmy-nominated writer for shows like Inside Amy Schumer, Difficult People, and The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt. As Josh discovers, she's well prepared for Trump's America – thanks to years of violent video games. Also: they're both from Philadelphia, so American dystopias are in their wheelhouse. Sit back and let the cool confidence with which this pair plan to face down our conservative hellscape wash over you. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey and welcome to tomorrow, I'm your host Josh Wittipolski. Today in the podcast we discuss that I'm Hussein, the Sega Dreamcast, and Philadelphia. But first, a word from our sponsor. If you're running an e-commerce business, Whiplash is your virtual warehouse. You send your products to a Whiplash facility so that when orders come in, Whiplash packs and ships them just like you would, but faster and cheaper. Leave the logistical hassle of order fulfillment to them and save money on shipping costs while you're doing it. Look, the holidays are coming.

It shouldn't be a stressful time for you. You're going to want to use whiplash. They've got facilities in Detroit, San Francisco, Los Angeles, and London. And listeners of this podcast can get a hundred dollar credit when signing up at getwiplash.com slash tomorrow. My guest today is a former UCB comedian and Emmy nominated writer for shows such as the Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, Difficult People, and Inside Amy Schumer, a few things you may have heard of.

I'm of course talking about the fantastic, the delightful, the highly comedic Emily Altman. Emily, thank you for joining me on this. We're in a very dark. Oh my God. This is good, like, because you're a comedy, so this is really good, because we're in a very dark place in the world. Trump has just, I don't know if,

for people listening, if you don't know what's happening, let me tell you, because this is gonna go up several days after we record it, but I wanna talk about it. Trump has won the election He is the president elect of the United States of America. It almost sounds like a joke It does it really does. I mean Back to the future to actually have I mean basically just Biff get elected

Biff is president because I remember it's early stages. I was like oh this guy's exactly like Biff Like I never thought much about Donald Trump Did you become his president? Because I remember at the early stage, I was like, oh, this guy's exactly like Biff. Like I never thought much about Donald Trump. Now I've been forced to be, I mean, what is going on? I mean, what is actually going on? Yeah. Is there anything funny about this?

Oh my God. Is there anything funny about the comedian? It's so weird. No. I mean, right now, no, it's just painful. It's, that's all, I just, it just feels incredibly painful. I'm sure it will be. Really? Yes, no, it's just painful. It's, that's all, I just, it just feels incredibly painful. I'm sure it will be.

Three-hundreds of furnace? Yes, yes, of course. Were you a burning, prior to that were you a burning bro? I was really torn between the two. Can I call a lady a burning bro? Is that? Yeah. A burning bro.

A burning bro. A burning bro. I mean, it was a little bit of a burning bro. Yeah. But I liked them both, actually. And then and then of course as soon as it became Hillary There's no question. Yes, that was a total Hillary supporter. She would have made a wonderful president. Yes, she would have. I mean, she would have made a sane president. And now we are in some kind of like surreal

Nightmare alternate universe. Maybe Trump will be really good. That's what I actually, I was saying that today. That was maybe one of the first things that made me laugh as I was saying to a friend of mine at breakfast today. We both were like, what if Trump is the best president we've ever had and was crazy progressive and like braised in all these things? It's like, no, he's not crazy.

Ben Carson is gonna run the Department of Education and he believes that the pyramids were used as grain silos in an creation young earth Creationism. So we're not sure that those are real We don't know we're not sure we have all the fault. Maybe we have some things to learn the facts are you know facts are Ephemeral their ephemeral there, you know people are always discovery new things Yeah, there was a period where they thought that when people got sick. It was just an evil spirit now We know it's actually Now we know. It's actually...

No, we know. It's vaccines. It's vaccines. It's vaccine. Thank God. So, yeah, so it's actually really good to think about this. I mean, I will say this. I was on the streets of New York yesterday.

And the mood... I would describe the mood as post 9-11. It really was. I was here post 9-11. It really was. I was here in 9-11 and I was, remember, and that's how it felt. I've never been on a subway car as quiet as I was yesterday. You walk in, like, I was crying, did you catch a big car?

Yes, I was crying and I saw other people crying on the street. Did you see people crying as well? Yeah, I saw, I almost started crying actually. I got out, I was, I could I drove and then I got out of my car and then I was like, like all this all of this could go away at any moment. Yeah. Like no there was definitely the vibe on the street was people were unnecessarily nodding to one another.

A lot of like a lot of like looks of Welp. If I can describe the look of people's face it's Welp. Here we are. I mean right now bin Laden is looking down from paradise. Down, okay. Looking down from paradise, and he's just like, I nailed it. Everything he wanted, everything he wanted is happening. It is crazy though.

Trump is what Bin Laden imagines America is. He imagines like every, listen, a gold house. And like, has a ton of plastic surgery for. Well Trump is like the Saddam Hussein of America in a lot of ways. There are a lot of similarities. Like I bet Saddam Hussein and Trump probably would have actually gotten along

because they both have bad taste. They're like god-e-horrible shit and like paintings of themselves. I mean he has more, he's definitely like, he's really has the style of a dictator. I mean, completely. A personal style of a dictator. Yes.

You know? That's a really good point, because he has that distinct personal style and the only other times I can think about when I've seen that, especially with weird hair. Weird hair is a very dictator thing. It's very, dictators can't get their hair right. Mm-hmm. They like paintings in themselves Gold stuff. Yes seems to be a theme. Yeah, well, I guess it's like they're like royalty

Also names on things like putting your name on necessarily to the point that you license it out to things you didn't build Yeah, yeah, Trump. What's gonna happen to all this businesses? Well, they say that there's going to be He's had a blind trust blind trust Rumba his family, which is like what beautiful. It's not that belongs That's not what a blind trust All I know is if he does is good a job with America's he did with his casinos where we're gonna be We're in Lanark City He's gonna build another casino another America straight across the street that will put the first America out of business Basically, another casino, another America straight across the street that will put the first America out of business

He's gonna do a new casino in DC called the called the gold house where you can make a lot of dough The greenhouse Okay, so anyhow, but so you're a woman I am now in Trump's America Women not don't seem very high on the list of priorities. Well, women, I don't think are fully considered people, first of all, unless they're a 10. Unless they're a 10. That's gonna be the new metric for citizenship. Are you a 10? All the matters are you a 10?

Yes. But how do you feel as a woman? Devastated. I'm sorry. No, devastated. And actually, one of the things that was the most painful, as I'm sure it was, for a lot of'm sure it was for a lot of, I'm a white woman and for a lot of white women

was just incredibly painful to see how many white women voted for Trump because I think there was, I'm maybe naive part inside of me that thought, no woman, no woman could listen to the way that he talked. When you just know, every woman has heard language like that, their whole lives from pieces of shit. And so when you hear it, you know it and you're like, that guy's a piece of shit. So it was shocking to me that it was shocking to me that any woman could hear that and not

be like, nope, I can't wait to fucking take this guy down. Yeah, I agree. What's interesting that I've been tweeting a lot about the election, and I'm obviously very unhappy, because Trump didn't win by a larger margin. No, I'm very unhappy because Trump is a horrible person. And people who voted for him, who a lot of them who have tweeted at me,

are like, I'm like, this guy's a racist, he's sexist, he's like a terrible, horrible scary person. And they're like, that's not what we voted for. They're like, we voted for jobs, we want jobs back in America. You can't, I can't see it. You go listen to the economic, you know, the economically depressed. And it's like, no, I actually think people don't, I think they tuned it out. I know.

I think they, I think they really did like, they're like, oh, that's just talk. He's just talk. He's just talking. I do think there are people who don't believe that they're racist or sexists. And I think probably some of these white women who dismiss somehow in their brains made some kind of like math at work

where he isn't that thing. Yes. But I think mostly what I feel like is that people just voted for a guy who they saw on TV and thought was charismatic. Like not for a policy, just for a guy who they were like, he seems cool. He seems like an entertainer because he is.

He's very entertaining. He's very entertaining and that was one of the hardest things with Hillary. It was like, Trump is funny. He's actually funny. He's got great timing. He's funny. I really wish he wasn't. But you know the thing about, the thing about it is, like, it doesn't, I feel like it's

bad criteria for a president. Oh, God. I mean, Obama now kind of fucked us all up. Yeah. Because Obama, very smart, very good politician, incredible president. People don't know. People don't know who've been, who've grown up with Obama. I feel so bad for them.

And that's why they didn't fucking go and vote. Or they voted for Jill Stein. I'm sorry, I'm gonna just rant. Or they voted for Gary Johnson at Jill Stein. And they're like, it doesn't matter. It's no big deal. I think you've had Obama, which is the best. It's because, oh, it's President, we've ever had the dream

that the one that it's like, okay, that's done for my lifetime. I don't think I'm gonna ever have a President like that again. I don't know, maybe he can, maybe he can just run again. I was like, what if he just keeps holding press conferences? After today, I was like, I was like, if Obama just kept acting like the president, I feel like people would go for it.

I feel like they'd be like, all right, okay. But yeah, the thing about Obama, he kind of ruined everybody because he's so funny and charming and also he's an amazing president. And now it's like, yeah, I guess Trump is like, I wouldn't say charming is the word I would use, but there is a certain charisma that he has. He's easy to watch.

He's easy to watch. It's not difficult to listen to. There's something entertaining about him. He would make an amazing reality show star. Yes, but that would be crazy. That's a bad idea. So we're living in a very dark time. Can America recover?

Yes, I do think American. Really? What do you think will have to happen? Well, we've got midterm elections in two years, and I really, right now, this moment, and I wonder if you feel the same, it feels right now like people are spurred to action and really want to do something. It feels that way, and I know people

have been giving a lot of money, people are holding fundraisers, people, are marching in the streets. So are we gonna make it in two years to get to get, are we gonna get to? I'm scared of that too. Because the Republicans did. Yeah.

I mean, they turned everything, right? And they've held it for a long time. But I don't know, man. Democrats have really seemed like fucking lazy right now. They do. I'm just hoping that the way that I am feeling and that most of the people that I've spoken to feel, which is like this absolute, like, basically, like we're gonna die otherwise.

Like I'm afraid for my life. It's really funny. I mean, all we have to do, all people have to do is vote. Yeah. But literally all you have to do, every couple of years, you just go to a thing and you write some stuff down or you put it like push a button and then you're done. And that's all you have to do, every couple of years, you just go to a thing and you write some stuff down or you put it like push a button and then you're done. And that's all you have to do.

But like it, doing that will completely change the world. I, how do you feel at the fact that every, you know, the Jill Stein, whatever, the independent people, that kind of annoys me and it bothers me. And I definitely, you know, there's people that I have to block on social media where I'm like, I don't wanna hear that. But the 46% of this country that didn't vote at all,

I'm like, I think we should have mandatory voting. I think we should vote at all. It will make it a national holiday, first of all, right? And then maybe like not a Tuesday. I wish your pay people 10 bucks to vote. Just be like, you'll get $10, you go vote, everybody will vote.

Yes. Like $10 for free, they'll hand you a $10 bill there. Yeah. How much would that cost us? Do me do the math last week. For $20, which was $7 billion. Did I say that last week? $7 billion? That's $20. We can afford that. So it's three and a half billion dollars. Yeah, if we did $10, I just take money just to any help.

Do it on a Sunday. I let's talk about, let's talk about happier topics. So you're a comedy writer. You got your start as a sketch actor. Can I call it actor? Yes, you can call it a sketch. Is that your start, though? Both. I was writing sketches that then I also performed in.

But I was writing sketches for, I had an indie sketch group and team where we performed. We were gentlemen caller. Okay. And so we perform around the city. And I would act in them as well, but I had like, you know, other actors. You were writing. You were writing. Give me an example of, did you create characters?

Was there a character? Yeah. Did you do repeat characters? No. It wasn't like SNL where it was like, I'm the church lady. I just wanted to know.'t if you wrote the church lady It would be really cool if that was the example I gave you it's like I did the church lady and then I had these two cheerleaders

You're like great No, yeah, I will like I didn't I don't really when I write like sketches. I don't really think like I've got this What if there's like this crazy character who does this? It's it doesn't work that way for me I think some people do that with a frog what if there's like this crazy character who does this? It doesn't work that way for me. I think some people do that. You're a frog. What if there's like a frog? I think a frog, but he's got a top hat. So he's good. That's really interesting.

That's really funny, right? That's really funny. You're very good at this. What is the first thing you remember writing? The first comedic thing you remember writing? In my life? I don't know. I don't know. Jesus, what am I supposed to have all the questions?

Are answers about that? Oh, this is weird. I don't know. I don't know Jesus, what am I supposed to have all the questions? Uh. Or answers. Oh, this is weird. A couple, like my early, maybe I was like 20 or something. I started writing Yelp reviews and I like spent so much time and effort and writing these yet. My sister actually was working for Yelp at the time and so she would be bored and was like, we just, so I can read something like write write some because she had to go and edit them

or make sure they were okay for content. And I remember being very passionately involved in like meticulously writing really funny, or hoping that they were funny, Yelp reviews. Do you remember any of the things you wrote at Yelp reviews? I do remember I described one coffee shop as like a haunted, the most boring level of a haunted house video game

because it looked, it was like just, I can't describe what it looked like but if you'd seen the place it was, so it actually was like that. Yes, it actually was like that. So you got your start writing funny, yelp reviews. Do you remember your name on there? Could we look it up? Oh God, yeah, I think it's, no, it might be E-ultman but I can't I can't remember look that up Google that this guy's

very good on the computer yeah it was like a decade ago it's a amazing computer user a whiz a real comp whiz so what's the first thing you wrote the first thing you wrote for real you mean professionally you know I mean. Don't mess with me. I really don't because I was, I'm tired of these games. I did stuff at UCB, you know, for five years.

I was doing stuff non-professionally for five years. You were game paid for that. No. You were like volunteer work. Yeah, volunteer work. It's a good deal for them. I mean, where does that lead? It's a really good deal for them also

because basically if you're on a house team at UCB, also you have to pay your director and you have to pay for So you basically got a pyramid scheme. It is it's this pyramid scheme that everybody loves to be involved with. But like you can not anybody can do it you have to be approved. You have to be approved. You have to have enough money to pay. It's like Scientology actually. A little bit. And they coach you. Yeah. You can get clear there. Uh huh. All right. So anyhow, so the first thing you wrote, you can't remember.

Um, I can remember an early, I can remember an early sketch I wrote in a class, like a, like an early sketch class that was, um, a baker. It was about a baker who kept writing political messages on his cakes. Real 15, yeah. Yeah. That was the way it really is.

Coffee shop bakery. Yeah, Yelp. Okay, yeah. Um, so he was writing political messages. He was like main really is coffee shop bakery. Yeah, Yelp. Okay. Yeah So he was ready political message. He was like writing like no blood for oil and like people were like this is supposed to be an anniversary. Okay, yeah, that's really good. I wonder what he would write now. I know I was like I'm so relevant my Hashtag never tried. Yeah, that's you should revive that No, it's good. So how do you end up writing for diss does it use me people and then they're like, hey, I'm

making a TV show, you should check this out. A little bit. Really? A little bit. Is it how it works? I mean, I think being at UCB for a long time, you end and hopefully, you know, producing stuff that people like, then you do, you make friends, you make a community, and then eventually, you know, it's a big community, but one of your friends, oh my God, gets

a job and it's so exciting or another friend, you know, it's a big community, but one of your friends, oh my God, gets a job and it's so exciting, or another friend, you know, sells a book or something. So eventually you're accumulating enough friends that, you know, someone will remember you, hopefully, and it's not like they just hire you, but my first job was a friend of mine from UCB who got, who's Julie Klausner,

and she, I met her at UCB and she was working on a show at MTV and she asked me, she just remembered me and was like, you should submit for this. And for me, it was like just somebody knowing who I was and having the ability to apply for that. But then, you know, it's the talent that makes it out of it. So I saw it. It has to be the talent.

And now you're a professional comedy writer. Now you're going from show to show just fixing, fixing up the scripts, creating scripts. What do you do? Do you come in with ideas? I'm sorry, this sounds so basic. I'm like, I am curious about this because I obviously understand how things are written, but clearly that I've involved in the writing of them.

But you come in and you're writing for, are you on the full time, you're writing all the time with them? Yeah, you mean during a season of Keyes of Interest? Yeah, you, I mean, are you on the full time, you're writing all the time with them? Yeah, you mean during like a season of Christmas, right? Yeah, you, I mean the way that it, when you come in, we're not immediately like writing down dialogue or anything, there's a chunk of time. On most of the shows I've been on that are like

narrative shows, not like sketch, where you're just blue sky ideas. You're kind of like come from a couple weeks. Like what are Kimmy falls into a trash can? Completely, yeah. But like maybe bigger idea, like, you know, like, like really a couple weeks. Like what are Kimmy falls into a trash can? Completely. But like maybe bigger idea like like what? Like, you don't think it's big enough? I mean, I think I think there's so much to do with that.

Is it a pie eating contest? Yeah. She's a top hat on and the baker's really polluted. And now you've got the whole season. See, that's a full season. Oh, she opens a bakery. That's pretty good, interesting. And so, but how long does it take to get an episode

from your blue sky session to your guys are shooting it? Depends on the show, but like... Are there deadlines? Yeah, there are deadlines, especially once. The part of the process, I think, that's like the most amorphous, at least in my experience, on different shows, has been the brain storming, pre-putting dialogue on paper. That part can take a month, that part can take two weeks. It can take, once you're actually writing, you have a deadline because usually there's table reads, so it's like you have to get this done by X time,

and then you have a shoot coming up. So, is that high intensity for you? Do you give any nervous around that deadline situation? I actually find personally, I work the best in that. I work in that environment. And that I like that. I like having a job that I really know exactly what my task is and I have to get it done by tomorrow.

As opposed to like, come up with some ideas for tomorrow. So that to me, that's what I'm into. I would be very happy to sit in a room basically all the time talking about just vague ideas. Well, that is a lot of what comedy writing is. It's an amazing tale. Actually, well, I didn't want to say it here, but I am a comedy writer also. Now, I can finally admit, we're going to take a break and then we'll be back. What you're going to have about comedy.

I want to have the roots of comedy as an art form. Cool. And I really want to get into the philosophy of what is a laugh and how do you get one. So we'll be back with Emily Alman after these messages from Presumably Me. Support for tomorrow, the podcaster're listening to comes from Salesforce. Salesforce helps marketers get smarter about their customers and plan better campaigns that blur the lines between marketing, sales, commerce, and service, all in the name of customer

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What is funny to you? Funny is a laugh, funny is a child's first cry in the morning. That's funny to you. Funny is a child's first cry. Wow, that's fun. That's funny to you. Funny is the person screaming and paying. Is it adult crying? It's funny. Either appendix is exploded. I mean, see, this is making us laugh. I know this is actually a trip.

Just the idea of that. You're funny. But, you know, something that's interesting to me is I always thought it was strange. I used to make music for a living. What kind of music? Well, I made dance music for a while, like techno music when I was younger. And then I produced a lot of bands and indie stuff from my brother, we at a studio.

That's cool man. And we made me have a band as well. That's cool, dude. It's so cool. I have a very cool guy I don't realize that about me. Thank you for noticing But why are you from Philadelphia? I'm from Pittsburgh. I did you are I'm a Pittsburgh. Yeah, why okay? I'm from Philadelphia and you have an O that is either very Philadelphia or my dad is from Pittsburgh

He is the same. You dad's from Pittsburgh from out Lebanon. Yeah, you dad's from out Lebanon. Yeah, really yes interesting So I lived in Philly for a couple of years. Okay. You grew up in Philly grew up in center city center city. Mm-hmm. Really? Like in a house and a house. Yeah. Townhouse. Yeah. Okay. Couple of different places, but South Philly. I'm telling you you think about Philly. I'm curious. You love Philly. Love Philly And also partially because my family doesn't live there anymore. So I have very much Romanticized it. I think it's a great city and I absolutely love it. Did you go to did you go ever go to Pittsburgh when you were if you're No, I never did he never it's so weird. He's lived his whole life in Pennsylvania But we it seems so far away. You say water. I don't anymore. I have a couple of philisms

But I don't I would never it's you're so become so self-conscious once you leave Philadelphia Do you have a charity and I do eat meat? I'm vegetarian. Oh, you are, yeah. I don't know why I asked that first. I have some reason you, I don't know, I got a total vegetarian vibe from you, which makes no sense.

I got a pizza with meat on it by the way. Yeah, that is so funny. I mean, lovers, pizza. Well, you know, let me tell you how I feel about Philadelphia, because I look at it for a couple of years. Where did you live? I Live when I first moved there. I moved to center city because where where exactly? I don't remember I honestly can't peach street No, that's not a place one of those pretty little streets

I don't know hold on so I moved to center city but only because the place I was both a live which was in Silk City is a diner right. You know that area. What is that area called? Is that Northern Liberty? Kind of Northern Liberty. Why I had an apartment that was over there but it was being renovated and when by the time I was ready to move from Pittsburgh to Philadelphia they were like, oh, we have some bad news. This apartment is already. We have another place we can put you up in and so any high went to this place in center city. Then I moved to fish town. Mm-hmm. I live in a lot of places Cool, these are cool. I lived in fish town when it was fish town

Yeah, it was not cool when I was throwing up. It was a cherry when I lived there It was a fucking nightmare, but I had a very cool apartment there and then I moved in northern liberties Mm-hmm. This is all this bit of two years that I moved to No, I'm sorry. I moved from This is all this bit of two years that I moved to. No, I'm sorry. I moved from fish town. Nope. Okay.

Center City. Then antique row or antique's row. You know where that is? Yes. It's like spruce tree. Yes. Okay. Right in the right inside city.

I lived in a trinity. Oh, okay. Which is a cool thing that I only ever heard about in Philadelphia. Yes. Yes. Oh, yeah. My stepmother used to have what it lived in one of those. Right. A trinity is also known as a father of son, holy ghost.

Is a small tiny little house where each floor is like one room. Yeah. My Trinity had, it was like living room kitchen, bedroom bathroom, and then the top floor was where I had, I had like a studio and I had a little tiny deck as well, you could go out onto. It was insane.

See, isn't that very cool? Like that's a Philly thing and I think it's very cool. That's pretty cool. That's called the Kent House apartment in New York. It's pretty cool. I mean, isn't that very cool? Like, that's a Philly thing, and I think it's very cool. That's pretty cool. That's called a penthouse apartment in New York. I mean, New York, that- They're all really old and like creaky and like, have great floors. Yeah, that's exactly what it was like.

And then I moved to Fish Town, and then I moved to Northern Liberty, which is the last place I've lived. I think Philly- So what happened with Pennsylvania, with our Pennsylvania, the National Election? Oh, and the election? Yeah, we blew it. No.

You know, in the middle of, in all of the people in Pennsylvania, I mean, they call, people I know call the middle of Pennsylvania, Pennsylvania, Pennsylvania. You never heard that. Yeah, of course, of course. Yeah. So as soon as you get outside of Philadelphia or Pittsburgh, it's very rural. It's like farm country. Also, right outside of Pittsburgh, that, because my dad's family is from outside of Pittsburgh

too, and Fayette County, which you know is, it's like, if you go there, the first time I went there, I was like, what? Everybody almost has Southern access. And it's like, because it's so close to West Virginia too, it really is, and it's very... The, yeah, I mean, what's part,

definitely part of the Rust Belt. And I mean, I heard what's really funny, is when I was driving, I was driving into work today. And I heard the BBC World Service, and it was, it was like, news hour, and they were in Harrisburg, or no, Allentown. And all the people there sound like they're basically from Pittsburgh or whatever.

Yeah, yeah. And I was like, this is so weird. This British guy's interviewing them. And he's like, tell me about, why did you vote for Trump? And they're like, oh, well, you know, he says he's gonna bring jobs back or whatever. It was really, that's like my version of a very thick because it reacts to him.

But anyhow, what I think is incredible is Trump went to those places to these people where it's like, we used to have a steel mill here, but it moved to Japan or whatever, or China. And he's like, I'm gonna get your steel mill back. And it's like, he definitely is not going to do that. No, that's not the way that he operates at all. And they were asking people like, well, what about all his, you know, his sexism and

race? And they're like, nah, you know, that's what you're here at the bar here. It's like, that's how people talk here. So it wasn't really a big thing. And it's like, oh, so you are a bunch of sexist racist people, I see. They're like, the excuse was like, oh, so you are a bunch of sexist racist people, I see. They're like, the excuse was like, that's how everybody talked. I mean, this person was merely like, I don't agree with it. But like, okay, I mean, nobody's like, hey, wait a second. Maybe we

shouldn't talk like that. We're think like that. Anyhow, so how did he win? I think that how he won is that here's what I've been saying. Sorry, really back on politics now, I don't think Trump won. I think Hillary lost. I think that she had an opportunity, well, we blew it. Democrats blew it. It would not have taken a lot for her to win. It just took more than a voter turnout that was like the 2000 election. Like nobody came out. Also, I blame the media, but there are also a lot of time. I, I, I, has a there are also a lot of people thought that in swing Yes, but of course, but that tells people not to stay home like my parents thought I don't want to vote because I don't really like her and it doesn't matter because we're in New York today But a lot of people thought that in swing states too. Yes agree of course And all of course all the media was like it's a shoe and she's got this online even in the worst parts of it

It was like well he gets to do it, but look at it I probably not got it, but also like I think what's interesting is that you look at voter turnout and people voted how they normally vote Yeah, it wasn't like he had this huge surge of millennials with bleached hair, bleach blonde hair or whatever. It was like about my lawyer. I'm talking about Nero. You know, it was just a bunch of regular Republicans who were like, I'm voting for the Republican candidate.

There weren't like a bunch of people who switched over from Democrat to vote for Trump. And there weren't, and certainly weren't a lot of people who went from Republican to vote for Hillary. There might have been a few, but it was basically like a regular election. The difference was nobody turned out. He had two million less votes than Mitt Romney

and still won. Yeah, one of the people didn't turn out. She had, I think it's like 16 or 18 million fewer people than in 2012. And that was lower. I think that was down from 2008. But it's like as low as it was in 2000, when George Bush won.

Who also didn't win by popular vote again. Have they resolved that? Has he now taken the popular vote as well? I mean, a bunch of like Republicans in my timeline. Oh, no, no, no, no, no. It's gotten wider. Has it gotten wider? wider, thank you. Because of California.

Yeah. Well, people are talking about California's succeeding from the, you have like, I'm into that. Collect it. I think they should do it. I'm gonna go, no, let's, let's, let's go go there. No, I love my country.

Avocados. I love my country. Do you? Yes. You love the country that elected Donald Trump? I don't love the, I do not love the people necessarily that elected Donald Trump, but I do love all of those states,

but I do love some of those people on all of those states. I do. Do you? Yes. In all of them? Yes. I'm not trying to be in a leftist, elitist, liberal, but honestly, actually, I totally get it.

I get the people are pissed off about jobs and shit. Trump's a fucking liar. Like that's part of the pro. Trump's not your solution. Like Trump isn't gonna help you, but I also will admit. Well, that's what made the white women turn out thing like, in like, do you honestly believe you're gonna be fine? He's not gonna help you.

That's the saddest thing about that. He's gonna help himself. He doesn't even think you're a person. So you're pushing. That's what's gonna happen. Right, but you know what? I thought like looking at the media like we thought all year like feminism and like you know all these amazing things for women are happening. But Taylor Swift didn't say anything about it. Taylor Swift was noticeably so much.

Which should have been a bell weather. But yes, that should have been. But she's a phony. Sure she's like a say anything. She's the card. But she has no way to say what happened. She has been using feminism and talking about it, and using it on her work. Tell us when, no feminism was a bit bitter. Well, I guess we're finding that out because I've definitely felt very bitter and angry about that, about that Taylor Swift silence because I was like, I do, I do,

I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do. I'm surprised me. She has no political opinion. But she has been very, she's like best friends with very publicly good friends, Lina Dunham. Oh, why, she's come out for Hillary? I don't that's what makes me very suspicious. I think she has a Trump, she's a Trump country fan base that came with her to pop. Right. They're like just say nothing. Yeah. But I'm like, that's a good

you'll still have a million fans. That's the difference between a great, that's between a great independent pop artist and a phony. Katy Perry got into it. Yeah, Katy Perry got totally into it. I respect her for the job. I got into it. The darling was late, but she got into it. The lady Gaga has been committed. Yeah.

Beyonce was late, but she got in it. Hey, you know, better late than ever. But she, I mean, she endorsed and Junction, do my, but it was like, and not to get into it because you worked on it, but isn't it a little bit like when Schumer was giving, she was in the stadium tour and she said something about Hillary and all the fans got mad and it was like,

you've seen the show, right? Yeah, that I was saying. So you wrote for Inten Amy Schumer? Yeah. She did a show in Florida. I think, yeah. I think it was Florida. I think it was Tampa.

Sure, why not? Let's call it Tampa. And people walked out, right? Yeah, she was like nearly 200 people, but. Yeah, but whatever. I mean, she's truly bizarre. Her show is like 100% about like feminist ideas and how bad men are.

Yeah. Like it's very strange to me. Well, I think a lot of people are fans of, I feel like the, everything that we like and we think is funny, there are like hardcore Republicans who like it and think it's funny too. They just never think that they're the person who's being made fun of.

So I feel like those people at that Tampa show or whatever were like, oh, I love it when she's laughing about, I agree, I'm totally on her side unless she explicitly is like, these people that are voting for Trump, so, and then all of a sudden, they realize, oh, I'm not necessarily the same. I don't feel racist, so I'm not. Right, exactly.

If I'm laughing at what she says, then I can't be a racist. As a vegetarian, you may know this, but I think it's like one of those things where you can talk to me about anything, you can agree on everything. But if they love, if they're a meat eater and you're like, oh, you know, that's really bad, they fucking lose it. Well, they can be like, they don't want to be, they don't want to hear that. Yes.

It's very upsetting to them because it's like, Are you a vegetarian too? So I am struggling with vegetarianism. I have been eating fish, which I'm not proud of, and I don't feel good about, but I'm so. Hescutarian. But I'm so bad, I'm, I'm, I'm eating habits are so bad, I have to try to do. But I'm so... Heskitarian. But I'm so bad. I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm eating habits are so bad.

I have to try to do something. I'm very lazy. I'm never at home for like a, never like, I don't have time to cook anything or get a cooked meal. Yeah. I'm dying. I'm dying slowly, but surely. In fact, we were talking about before we started.

I'm gonna get full body liposuction because my body's falling apart. And that's how you repair a broken body. You're just, it's not about what's going on with it physically, it's about how it looks to people. Okay. That's what it terms America. I gotta be a 10, I don't wanna get caught.

You gotta, we all have to be a 10s. I don't wanna be rounded up in a deportation tank or whatever because I don't not attend. We gotta be a nation full of 10s. I wanna be hot. The Trump. The death panels are are stuffed with Simon Cowell. No. Sharon Osborne.

Sharon Osborne. I don't know what that voice is. I do like an Australian accent. I do. No. No, no, no. No, no. They don't have to say no.

The Australians can. New Zealanders are worse. They're like, no, it's like, we haven't, there's too many. No. There's like a lot of orders in that. Like, it. I, well, there's too many. No. There's a lot of orders in that. Like, it's like, I, you, anyhow, you've a new show. What is the new thing called?

I have a new show that I wrote for this summer. It's called Big Mouth. And it comes out, it's an animated show, so it doesn't come out until next fall. And there are another show that you mentioned? Probably. Broad strokes. No, that was your.

Do we just make that up? Yeah, we made that drogs. No, that was your. Do we just make that up? Yeah, we made that up. He asked if he was like, can we talk about, you know, we've got to talk. Brods' drogs. No, that would be great though. Brods' drogs are really fucking good show name.

Yeah. Anyhow. I mean, there's different strokes already. No, that's... Brods' hit. Yeah, like 25 years ago. This is like his... Brods' drogs, it's weird.

It's like women. It's a more women version. Oh my god, that's so good. That is so... Can we make the show? This is really his It's great on it's a woman. Yes, women Oh my god, it's so good. That is so could we make the show this is really good because that show definitely wasn't Racially problematic and anyway, so I think it's due for a revival Really you I'll tell you what though I love that show and I love to too I'll probably have talked about this before but do you remember the episode with the child molester? Of course. Oh my God. I was still watch that online. It's so amazing.

At the 80s, they did that. I know people don't make TV like they did. There was a Webster one that was a very similar. Webster one where like he's with his friend, I think, and his friend, like definitely like, it was always a friend that ends up getting child-rated. And it's a friend you've never seen before, and you will never see it.

He's on to that one at the same time. But it wasn't like you were endangered and almost happened. Like it's like, oh, it happened. It happened, it's not see it. He's on to that one at the same time. But it wasn't like you were in danger and it almost happened. Like it's like, oh, it happened. It happened. Just not to you. Now you have to testifying court. They don't follow up. Websford never like went to court.

Did you watch growing pains? I watched a little less of that. You see the Coke episode though, right? No, I don't know if I had. Oh my God. The Coke episode. Who does Coke? Okay.

Phoneer? Just let me talk about it for a give me a minute. So first off, this is the greatest. And you said, who does coke? Who does coke? Okay. A toner? Just, okay. Let me talk about it for a give me a minute. Would you? So first off, this is the greatest, this is the ultimate growing pains episode. It has everything, it's got it all. Here's what happens.

Mike and Eddie and Boner are going to get to pick up some pizzas when they run into a friend of Mike's who I believe is like in college now. And he's like, he was like, somebody he knew in high school, like that he graduated now he's in college. And he's like, he was like somebody he knew in high school like that he graduated in high school. And he's like, hey, we're having a party now. You guys wanna come over?

And they're like, oh my God, a college party. I don't wanna ruin this for anybody who hasn't seen it. Most of the old listings are like, what the fuck is growing pains? Now, also literally this podcast is now just me recounting the episode and we're at it. So now they go to the party and everybody's doing coke at the party in the episode. So anyway, they go to the party and everybody's doing Coke

at the party in the bathroom. And Mike has a huge crisis because he wants to be cool. But he doesn't want to do Coke because it's probably bad. And so he leaves an eddy and boner like, we're staying here, this party's awesome. We're not going anywhere. We're gonna do some Coke in the bathroom. Anyhow, this is, it's just like a really meaningful.

All I can tell you is the end of the episode is fucking incredible because Mike's like going to bed and Alan thick is like waiting up for him, his father, Robin, Robin thick's father, Alan. Yes. And he's like Mike, Eddie and Boenner called and they said they're not going to the bathroom and they're never gonna go to the bathroom again. It's like, what does that mean? And it mics like a lot, dad. A lot.

And then they show Alan thick like locking the door to really illustrate how unsafe the world is. And then locking the front door. He like locks the front door. His coax coax. The beans are going to come in. Well, the best moment of the long thing is the there is cocaine at this party. Yeah, right. Right. There's a pretty good like beats actually for the for the some comedic beats around the cocaine. Anyhow, it's an important episode. We'll just edit this down so that is thought just in the middle of it. You know, baby sad when you were talking is thinking about Kirk Cameron and how Kirk Cameron's probably really fucking happy about this election.

Let me tell you about Kirk Cameron. Yeah, I mean, I like, I've never seen this photo of him with the subway sandwich. Trump. Trump has the most B players. I mean, he's, I'm sorry, like it's like Rudy, Rudy Giuliani's going to be the attorney general. Newt Gingrich can be secretary of state. Ben Carson, what's he going to do? Secretary of Education. It's literally like Chris Christie's gonna be his chief of staff.

It's literally like the Dick Tracy villains, like flat top. I mean, do you remember the Dick Tracy? Yeah. They're all like ridiculous characters of like mafia guys. That's like his entire cabinet. Yeah. It's insane. What do you have there?

Uh, this is a photo he tweeted out a few years ago and it was labeled my birthday party. Oh, wow. That's a photo of Kirk Cameron blowing out a, a half mark cake with a couple subway sandwiches and two women hiding in the background. That's literally like the party. Maybe one of the most depressing photos I've ever seen. It's really tough.

Anyhow, in Trump's America, so anyhow, I was saying I gotta get my body in shape because I want Trump. I want Trump to. We all have to be ready for it. Yeah. A 10. So yes, so I saying I gotta get my body in shape because I want Trump to be ready for it. So I've been eating fish. And I'm just looped that part over. I've been eating fish.

I've been eating fish. There's cocaine. I've been eating fish again. Remix. Yes. Just with the world needs. Are you being a vegetarian? Is it a political climate change thing

or is it like I want to be skinny thing? It's a little of everything, but mainly it's that I love animals and I feel bad for the idea I feel horrible about the idea that we eat them because to me it's like you must be a human You know, yeah, like it's weird to me. I mean somewhere in America. Maybe we will I'm sure but when he when we're brought to our knees with the this economy stuff that he wants to do I mean his tax plan of putting us in trillions of dollars of debt. I'm being told but when we're brought to our knees with this economy stuff that he wants to do, I mean, his tax plan will put us in trillions of dollars of debt I'm being told.

Being told right now. Well, it's coming in right here. Like, 399 economists came together to say like, we do not endorse Donald Trump's plan, the only option until they're clandestine economic plan. And it was like, do you know how hard it is to get 399 economists to agree that like, this guy is, I mean, we're so past,

we're like so post fact or reason, it's crazy. It really is crazy to me. It is like, we literally have elected a person who is a reality star, a relatively bad businessman, and he's never governed anything ever. He's the president of the United States it is insane I mean at least Reagan was a fucking governor yes but at least if he was a really good businessman like even met Ronnie seems like a pretty competent business they're on he's a very good business man

like I did you see my post today there was a piece on the the the uh the federalist that was like that had done a study of like their economic abilities and Paris Hilton has grew her personal inherited wealth three times the rate five times faster than Donald Trump did like she's a much better business woman. Donald Trump is a well-documented failed business man. He said so many failed businesses and so many bankrupt like nine bankruptcies or something. Yeah. It's really crazy because it seems like there's, I mean, I've always said that there's no plan that everybody's just making shit up, but now like it's fully transparent that there is, that we are just riffing.

That America is just a, we're just been on a long riff and now the tune has completely changed and nobody knows what the fuck is happening. And I find that's, like, but your point, maybe it means he'll be kind of incredible. Is that possible? Every time I think that, even jokingly, because I believe Donald Trump is like a shell sociopath inside, like he's just like stainless steel, like I don't think he necessarily like sits and thinks

about hating people, I don't think he gives a shit about anyone, but Mike Pence, unfortunately, is a horrible person. Is a person who passionately, and with a deep fiery passion, has a lot of targeted hate to most people. So, say people, women. Right, so I think together, actually that's true.

I think Donald Trump, I don't think Donald Trump sits and hates women. I think he just disregards them. Reminder just a thing that happened. Yes. That happened by him and he does whatever he wants. He's not high on him, that it means to really have that. He's got 24-7 drug pedas.

He can't do anything about it. But here's the thing about Trump. I was like, well, he's got some cases against him. He's got a fraud case. There's a rape case. Well, is that happening? The rape case? Yeah, isn't it?

Did it do? So I think the civil suit is still on, but they're dropped criminal stuff. But we're talking about a president. This is good. The president. But I keep thinking, well, maybe he'll be impeached. But even the Trump University case,

it depends, my guess president. But what if that happens before somebody was saying this today and I was like, oh, what if he fucking blows it before December? Is that possible? Well, then you have the faithless elector thing where it's like they have to choose between the vice president that people didn't sort of elect and the Popular vote candidate and then whoever wins ever America will hate them and it will you know like whatever

I know who cares about that if Hillary Clinton imagine my I woke up the day I mean I kept having these like I was like like, Oh, something she's going to get when she did her her her speech. She's going to whip receipts out. I thought she'd be like, you know what? Actually, we read the numbers and it looks like we got one this thing. And so we're not saying that we're not conceding that didn't happen. When she didn't come out at her victory party, I knew that that we were done.

Because I thought she would at least come out and say, like, we will talk tomorrow, but we'll stay strong to it. I think that was a moment where I was like, oh, like, people are going home, having not had anything happen in that building. I thought maybe it was like, she's really pouring over the numbers right now.

I imagine her pacing in a room with a large spool of, like, returns going like, you know, doing that thing with eyeglasses when you put them down on your nose a little bit. Oh, I pictured an iPad and Activia and like Chelsea making people leave her alone. Oh. I don't know. I mean, I don't know.

I mean, what do you think? What was that feeling like? What the fuck? To be beat by Donald Trump, you spent your entire life in the service of America and then Donald Trump wins. How I don't understand the her level of strength also during that concession speech that she ultimately gave was looking at her

and I was like, I don't, it was sad because I was like, wow, what a leader. And it's like, this is not our leader. She was like, very presidential. It was unbelievable how she did that where I was like the pain that she, if I'm feeling this much pain, I, she must be, I don't know how she's, I don't know how she did that. Where I was like the pain that she, if I'm feeling this much pain, I, she must be, I don't know how she's, I don't know how she did it.

I'm sorry to keep, I'm sorry to keep coming back to the election, but I can't stop thinking. Well, it's changed our lives forever. So, it's also the biggest post. I really wanted, I'm sorry, but like, I understand Hillary might have been a flawed candidate to a lot of people. She's so far less flawed than Donald Trump.

Oh my God. You can't even calculate the difference. But like I also was, so I didn't think about it a lot. I was like, man, I really want a woman to be the president. But like I think I was talking to Laura, my wife, and I, you know, she was obviously very upset. And was like, oh yeah, people really hate women.

And I was like, it didn't cross my mind at all that this was like a vote. This is like to me that I was voting for or against any gender. It was like, just like she's the best candidate. But I do think like it's a really the worst message possible to send to women and to young girls. Like, nope, you can do everything right and also be way better. Yes. And well, that tweet that was like, we would rather elect anyone on Earth than the most qualified woman in the world.

Yeah, it's true. I mean, literally, it's true. But I can't help it be basically angry at Democrats for letting this happen, because I do feel like, and I don't know that it's like Hillary's fault. It's like the level of laziness on the part of the voters, if like a couple of million more people had come out on the Democrat side, not even.

I mean, how many votes would it have been to take over Michigan? Where are the people where were you listening? And you didn't vote? What? If you're a Democrat and you stayed home, or if you're a Democrat and you voted for a third party candidate, I'm just saying,

yeah, you're a bad person. I do think you're a bad person. You made a very, very irresponsible decision that you should personally be responsible for, but you're not. You do think you're a bad person. You made a very, very irresponsible decision that you should personally be responsible for, but you're not. You've made everybody else responsible for it. Like, what's the, what is the point? I don't understand the laziness, it's just like, just go vote.

Yeah. Like, what is the thing that keeps you at home? You don't like Hillary, but do you like Donald Trump more? Do you think that he'd be a better president for the country? It's ideological security. I wanna feel it, Susan Sarandon, shit, right? I'm just a random. I wanna feel clean.

I fucking hate Susan's a random. She's the one of the worst people. I just worry like how, I don't know. How do you like laugh at this? Like I've seen a lot of people making jokes on Twitter and it doesn't sit right yet. Well, I think. Because I don't think we're there yet

because there's so much fear and pain about what happened. I mean, I'm sure it's easy to make a joke if you're like a white guy or something, but if you're a woman or a minority or gay or anything that isn't part of like basically like a Aryan, I mean even Jews. Like if you're basically not an Aryan and like rich, that's the thing. It's like you can have deluded yourself, but if you're middle class, you're basically not an Aryan, and like rich, that's the thing. It's like you can have deluded yourself, but if you're middle class, you're just as fucking like no poor white people are worried about somebody,

you know, stabbing them or attacking them. Or I mean, there's already been a rash of race, race, race, attack today. We woke up to eat trans kids killed themselves. And I was like, I'm sorry, your jokes about pin being orange or just not landing today. Yeah. Is that true? Yeah, eat trans kids killed themselves. And I was like, I'm sorry, your jokes about pin being orange or just not landing today. Yeah. Is that true? Yeah, eight trans kids killed themselves.

How is that comparatively statistically? How does that compare? That doesn't happen every day. I mean, it happens a lot. Yeah, I know the suicide. Like 40% of trans people call themselves- I know the suicide rate is high. But it's not overnight like that.

Yeah. I mean, honestly, I mean, I didn't think about killing myself, but I was like, where could I escape to? And I was like, oh, there's death. I was like. I mean, honestly, I mean, I didn't think about killing myself, but I was like, where can I escape to it? I was like, no, there's death. I was like, you know, like, because there is really no escape from America. Right. America is like really, really big,

like really a major player in the world. And this is such a downer of a conversation. Yeah. Sorry, we're literally talking about death, like my own death. Anyhow, so when are you writing a comedy? What's that chocolate? How do you get a chocolate out of a group of people?

Well, you're just going back, right, into normal questions. How big is writing stuff with something like gone breakable, Kimmy Schmitt? It's like, I mean, somewhere between nine, maybe around 10 people. It's a lot of people. Do any of the actors write?

On Kimmy Schmitt, none of the actors wrote on this Netflix show that's coming up, which is... Broad strokes. Broad strokes. It's called Big Mouth. It's coming out 2017. Big mouth, look for it. That was a bunch of, it's a Nick Crowell and John Mulaney

and some other Jenny Slate and Fred Armason. Slate, Jenny Slate dating Chris Evans. I know. He made a lot of say it all. He did it and I was curious about that. I was so excited about that. I find Chris Evans to be extremely bland. I don't know what.

I thought he's bland. I'm not that interested in him, but I did notice he tweeted something anti-Trump and I thought I was like, now I like you. He is a little bit better. He is a woke. I was like, is because he's a little bit woke. Is he woke? Because he was raised with sisters, a single mom,

and a gay brother. And he's like extremely sensitive to those issues, but he's also like super like, I mean, this isn't for me to judge, but from what I can gather, he's very like racially conscious. Well, I saw it, yeah, I was pleased that he tweeted. I was like, oh, you're wrong. So you wanted the guys who was calling

Scarlett Johansson a slot. Oh no. Where's that Robert Denny's, Jimmy and Jeremy Renter. He wanted the guys who was calling Scarlett Johansson a slut. Oh no. Well, I don't know. Or is that Robert Denny's dream here in Germany? I think that's Robert Denny's dream here in Germany. You're a Johnny Renter. Anyhow, but you're saying the actress wrote a nice show. I was gonna say on that show, Nick is on the show,

and he also wrote, and so yeah, sometimes that happens. Is this your dream? Is this your dream job? This is it. Yeah. You're doing it. Yes. So you could do this for the rest of your life.

I want to do this for the rest of your life. Yes, I want to write for the rest of my life. I want to. You want to do this for the rest of your life. Yes, I want to write for the rest of my life. That's incredible. What does that feel like? I don't. I'm always like very restless, I feel like. I mean, I still, I think like this is true for everybody on the planet.

You get into one thing that you like and then you real, you have a new goal after that. It's like, I don't want to continue writing the, you know, I don't know what I'm going to be writing in 10 years. I think I'm still going to be writing, but it might be very different than what I've done so far. Like, you think you might write a book? Yeah, like I might write a book,

or what if I wanted to write something serious? You wanna write something serious? I don't have to feel that way right now, but I know that like anybody who does one thing for a while, I feel like I'll get curious and get bored. And, you know, and I love my favorite stuff to watch is not comedy. I don't actually watch a lot of comedy.

What do you watch? I love, well, I love like true crime. I love documentaries. Really? Like documentaries is like my favorite. I love nonfiction really. Really? And I think you might want to commit a murder one day.

I think I might, and then film a documentary about it. And then write a book about the killing. Yeah. That's a good, that's probably a good gig actually. I'm the people who buy the shit out of that. Yes. Well, OJ tried it, didn't work out that well. The twist at the end is like turn the camera and like, I did it.

It was me. I hold it the night forever. It's not thumbs up, there's a knife there. Have you read, if I did it by OJ Simpson? Unfortunately, I have, yes. It's actually called I did it. But if it's really tiny. If I did it, but the if is so tiny, I bought a digital copy of it. But then if it's really tiny. And if I did it, but the if is so tiny.

I bought a digital copy. I did too, I did it. I'm kind of the only one I had found out that all the money went to the Goldman family and it was like, okay, I still felt sick reading it. I didn't read the whole thing. I just read. I went to page through.

I got into the chapter six, I think, is where it goes down. Because there is chapters there, he's just like, I'm great, everything's great. Look at me. He's like, I was in, well, yeah. He spends the whole time trashing Nicole, the whole thing that's book before.

He's like, just, you know, I was sitting at home and she's doing nothing. You know, just something. So you should understand something. If she was murdered, she'd fucking deserve it. She had a coming, she hypothetically might have had a coming. It's like anyhow. And then he sets up for half of the book as him setting up

that her character was awful and she was mean and she beat me. What? Well, poor OJ. We gotta get him out. What a year he has had, am I right? Yeah, 2016. Do you think OJ is happy about this Trump?

I'm sorry. He's like, maybe I can get him out. I mean, no, no, Trump. Oh, I mean, OJ is the perfect, that's the perfect pardon opportunity for Trump. Like, he really, can we get, we get part is OJ is the perfect, that's the perfect pardon opportunity for Trump. Like, he, we get, we get part of OJ's existence. Doesn't that seem perfect though? Yes.

He's like the, a pairing made in heaven for Trump. Maybe OJ could be part of the cabinet in some way. Yes. This has been a bad year, would you agree? Yes, I would. I was thinking that on the way over here, I think 2016 has been a really rough, nobody's favorite year. I think it's been the worst year we've ever had. I was thinking on the way over here. I think 2016 has been a really rough nobody's favorite year

I think it's been the worst year we've ever had. I think it's bad What are the highlights? What are things that you can take away from 2016 that are good that have given you hope for the future? Um, or at least made you forget about the present for a moment You can't make a vent. I can't think of any right now Um, oh here we go. I thought there was like maybe some cool art. I was trying to think it was a great Movie that I've seen? Really liked the crown on Netflix. I think that I should check it out.

It's truly watchable, gorgeous, not too much depth. But you know what? I'm not going to watch it all up next in it. Oh yeah. Really? I mean, we're not talking Westworld, but not interested. What's wrong? They've raised the bar from his sex.

There's a lot more British sex, which is just smoking. People just kiss each other, the cheek, and then looking ashamed. I love it. I put each other to bed. Lady Dynamite, I love it. Lady Dynamite, that was a spectacular. That was a spectacular. It was so good.

It's so original. I think it's a great time to watch it. I loved it, and that was a highlight. It was a bright spot in 2016. Yeah, I feel like it's been a very dark Mundo Pokemon goes over I did it. I committed for a month surprised myself. Are you an app person? I mean who self identifies as like me on an app person? I know Maybe you have to meet the first one right now. I don't self identify

Are you like to play games on your phone though? I play video games in my house, but not on my phone. Oh, you're a gamer. I am. Are you a gamer? Would you say you're a member of a gamer game? I would describe myself as definitely a member of gamer game. What do you, what is your game of choice? I like open world Xbox games.

Okay, I'm listening. So, such as, I'm like, I can't believe we can talk about this sooner. I love Skyrim. I love. Interesting. All the assassins Creed. How do you feel about Fallout? Fallout I love.rim. I love. Interesting. All the assassins creed. How do you feel about fallout? A fallout I love. Yeah, I love. Bio-shock I love. But yeah, interesting. Yeah. Okay. I love. There's a great

game I just played a couple months ago called The Last of Us, which is like, oh, we're not the last of us. Excuse me. No, not the last of us. Life is strange. Sorry. I thought the life is strange was incredible. I heard on spoiler alert. I started playing it, but I kind of lost interest. No, no, no. You stick with it. I don't like the time reversal. I thought it was one of the best TV shows of the last 10 years of the game.

The acting is so good in it, and that's so not, that never happens, video games, the acting and the writing is really good. The writing was so strong. And there's two teenage girls, and they're never played unreal. They're just like normal people. I love it.

The one fly we'll say is that there's a lot of setting it up to knock it down. Spoiler alert. Okay, anyway, we really like life at strange. And it's very cool. Have you played, it's not open world at all, inside? Yes, of course I played it. It's so good.

Is it not the greatest? Okay, so I played limbo too, which is good. I didn't really play limbo. I played limbo. I played limbo. I played limbo. I played limbo. I played limbo.

I played limbo. I played limbo. I played limbo. I played limbo. I played limbo. I played limbo. I played limbo. I played limbo.

I played limbo. I played limbo. I played limbo. I played limbo. I played limbo. I played limbo. I played limbo. I played limbo.

I played limbo. I played limbo. I played limbo. I played limbo. I played limbo. I played limbo. and upsetting and also like what the hell. But I had the whole, and kind of funny also, really. Well, the way his body, like, spoiler alert, people I don't know. His body, all I said, his body can be funny sometime. His body, it's great at the end of the day. Oh my God, I love it. I'm glad you brought that up.

Yeah, inside the group. Well, I was like feeling really despondent about games and then, and then people on, I was like, so they don't make good games anymore. Is that what's going on? Yeah, wait, what games do you, I want to know what games you really like? Well, Fallout 3 is my favorite game.

Yeah, pretty much. Well, I don't know if it's my favorite game. It's a new Vega, which one is Fallout 3? No, it's the one before new Vega. Do Vegas I hate? Okay, I like new Vega. Have I talked about this before? I think new Vega is pretty boring.

I pressed you on this before. I started playing the new Fallout. Which ones do you see? That's Fallout 3. Okay, so that's the one you really like. Also Fallout 3 has a DLC which is called the pit which is about Pittsburgh. Oh really? Are you kidding? No, I'm yes, I'm not kidding. Do you play Assassin's Creed? I so I don't really like these Assassin's Creed games. Some of them are so good.

I purchased several Assassin's Creed games like I'm gonna get into it. I'm gonna do it and every time I play them like this fucking. They're all over the map. They're all over the map. It really depends on which one you get. The American Revolution one sucks. Oh really, I want to look cool to me. I wanted to be pirates. I liked it felt it was relaxing and I felt I was on a Caribbean vacation when I played it. Sometimes I would just take my character

and dive into the water. I tell you what it's fucking awesome. Far Cry. Oh, I haven't played that. Did you play Far Cry 3? Well, there's a new one, Far Cry 4, which I've been working my way through. The Witcher.

I fucking hate the Witcher. No, I love the Witcher. No, it's like get some bark and get an egg and get it It's a I love it. It's what I like about Fallout though is that I'm just sometimes I'm just like I'm gonna make a house What skyrim is that's what we can you make a house and fall out in the new one? Yeah, I've been there I have a bug with that at all but skyrim you can get you just like get married, live in your house and like cook a stew for like three days. I did that. I was a cat. Skyrim, my character is a cat.

I got gay married to another male cat. And just like, Emily, are you describing my porn? That's amazing. You should see my character. She's Ron and fans. And I was like, I sent my husband out to work. Even though I think in the game, it's like, you should go out and like, you wanna do the missions, right?

But I was like, no, I just wanna stay here. I mean, send the other person out to do the missions. Well, I don't know what he did out in that world, but I just would like, spent a lot of time like going back to sleep. I'm like, building the looking in my drawers. Interesting, that is interesting. I, so I like, I mean, fallout three,

one of the things that went, oh, I started playing it that appealed to me was that, you could just walk around and do nothing. Like, I spent a lot of time just kind of like being like, oh, what's this? Yeah. Or like, oh, and then you run into weird stuff. And there was no narrative you had to follow.

So Fallout 4, it's kind of like that, but it just seems so kind of overwhelming. And I feel like to store it, you know, maybe I should play that. Maybe I'll play that tonight. the store, you know, maybe I should play that. Maybe I'll play that tonight. Assassin's Creed Syndicate, if I can recommend that. I would recommend that because it's beautiful, detailed Victorian London.

Okay. And you can just walk around. See, I don't like it. John played the entire thing. He would take every Sunday he was allowed to play as much as he wanted. TV, whatever, cancel anything. And he played it. And I just came in for bits and pieces between like reading a book and

I would walk in and it would just be like, we've got to get the muff up from doing the big any boot. Yeah, I'm not. I know it does not sound good to me. Or it's like you've got a rescue, someone's poisoning Charles Darwin. Rescue him. I don't need, I don't want that. It's, I, there's something about these asses Creed series. It's dorky because it's dorky as hell. Well, I don't want I don't want that it's the I just something about these asses creed series

It's dorky cuz it's dorky as hell. Well, I don't see that movie It's the theater kid of open-world video games. It starts like who's it Michael fast-bender? Yes, I play a movie in there. He's very fallen from gray He's the need to do that first first. He was in shame and now he's ashamed To be doing the films he's doing Zing. Fast burn, dober. Please.

Fast burn. Fast burn, dober. Please drag me down, Lord. So fall out. Maybe I should play a star playing again. I like games that are also, I like games that are dystopic and or scary. Yeah.

Oh, I love scary games. Have you ever played Alan Wake? Oh my god, I love Alan Wake. Alan Wake is so great. Alan Wake is about a writer That's why he comes to that character keeps running around the game is like I'm a writer, which I love I'm like that's what Alan wakes out literally Yeah, you got to collect the pages the ending is so good in that game

I like getting scared for you. I'm gonna be making a sequel, but it's been in production forever. What's the scariest game you've ever played? The first game I ever really played in my life was Resident Evil, and that was very, at the time. I'm sure now I would look at it and was thinking of the first one.

Yes, I remember there's one. Yes, and there's a hallway you have to walk through where a bunch of crows, like you're walking in, it's all quiet and all these crows burst through and I remember thinking like this is a scary story I just don't like the the way that your character, but you're always doing this No, it's bad and everyone's so Canadian. I hate the accents And I remember distinctly in resident evil one like you buy guns from some guy and he's like Sorry about that babe and I think you mean sorry about that. Sorry about that babe

This is babe. Is this babe? Yeah, well, it's like, you know, because she's like hot or whatever. But I. Jill Valentine. Is it Jill Valentine? The one is. I think it's Jill Valentine.

Maybe. I can be wrong. Can you fact check that please Ryan? The resident evil fell off after the first one. I don't play it yet. I bought a game cube just to play Resident Evil 4. I also bought a, I bought a dream cast to play, what is the dream cast?

What do you, did you like Silent Hill? I love Silent Hill. I love Silent Hill. The first one and the second one, and then those kind of fell off too. They did, but they were, it's like I want more games like that. I want there to be a shining video game. That's a good idea.

Here's what's cool about Far Cry. Do you have an Xbox or Xbox 360 or? Xbox, no, the new one. The new one. The one. Yeah. So they have Far Cry 4 for that. What's cool about Far Cry is it's open world. It's in like nature.

It's like, it's like animals. You actually have to like get collect animal, pelts and stuff. Okay. I obviously have a problem with. Right. But you can do anything you can go anywhere. And you have to, a lot of it is like you have to take these, because you're fighting this like army.

There's a urine in a place where there's a civil war and you're sort of like, this is cool. This is more interesting than I thought. It always is recommended to me, but I was always like, I don't think I'm gonna make that. I thought they were like weird bro games or whatever, but it turns out they're actually really interesting, thoughtful. They're kind of like you can play them however you want.

Oh, cool. But what's cool is you can take, there's a part of the game where you're supposed to like take these, they're like, what are they called? They're basically, hangouts, no, they're not hangouts. What the fuck do you call a thing where soldiers live and hangouts? Barix, okay.

Barix, thank you. Hangouts, what is wrong with me? There's barracks you're supposed to kind of take, you're supposed to take and control. Oh, okay. And so they're kind of like, it's what it's for all of a... There's Barracks, you're supposed to kind of take, you're supposed to take and control. Oh, okay. And so, they're kind of like, it's a cap to the flag, but much more complicated. So, you can do them, you can basically do them any way you want,

where you can go in like guns blazing, you can like, snipe people, you can set traps. It's really, really entertaining, because you're just like, you can spend, I've spent the whole game not doing any of the main narrative, and I just keep going. To keep lying to those things, I've spent the whole game not doing any of the main narrative, and I just keep going.

To keep knowing those things, I've figured out interesting ways to take them over. Yes. Which usually ends up with me just blowing things up. Well, just so you know, in Assassin's Creed Syndicate, one of your tasks that you have to do around Victorian London is called child liberation. So you go to Victorian factories,

and you have to find out a way to like free all these children that are working there And it's the same thing as the barracks where it's like I I love to silently go in there and throw knives at everyone's heads I can kill them. No, just they're guardians. Can you kill the kids? No, that doesn't let you which is what I do like that I like that you know it in the original fallout three you could kill kids and then and then they they made an update Where you couldn't kill the kids. There was a lot of that bio-shock stuff where I was like, like, people were like, when you used the kids or not,

you used the kids and it's like, how could you use these little girls? Let them go! I'm fucking used that kid. Did you capture you to play the last Grand Theft Auto? Five. I played Grand Theft Auto five. I wanted to pick it back up.

I got it for the, I had an Xbox 360 and then I got a one. And I think I have the 360 but not the one. I wish there was a way I could upgrade it into a better version. You can't really. I played a little bit. I find Grand Theft Auto annoying. Cause it tries to be funny and it's bro humor.

And the tone in Grand The theft auto is the worst bro yes yeah it's like home of phobic to like it's like so gross the radio stations it's like I I'm abrasive I'm stupid I've the only thing I like about it is that you can do a lot of exploring Oh I just drive my car out to the ocean but I take an ambulance and drive it off a cliff but I just there's nothing about the game to me the game is just not very now I kind of want to play it then I know you're talking about it I still can. Yeah, but like sunset overdrive is the most like Cloying trying to be funny and trying to be I don't know what that is. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh It's like it's like it's like you know, well, we're gonna bus speed of games like you can take a

You know, she would paint you that's a weapon. Oh, oh, it doesn't sound good. Oh, you know, it's another scary game It's a good. I'm enjoying this podcast. We did. Dead Rising. Have you played that? Dead Rising, wait, is that the one? That's a zombie in a shopping mall. Oh, yeah, Dead Rising is one of my favorite original Xbox, or Xbox 360 games.

It's definitely scary. But there's Dead Island, which is really good. I'm scared. That was one of the best trailers for a game I'd ever seen. The trailers in credit. Dead Island? Dead Island. Is it zombies? It's zombies.

And then, and then, it's really good. And then there's also a game called, what's the game? It's called like, Frogger. No. It's like, Don, something, Don,

Dead it, Don, Fuck, what it, it's a really good zombie game. What is the name? How completely escapes me. I love zombie games. I guess in a way like there have other better games ever placed have like taken the mantle from Resident Evil.

I love spooky, spooky games in the Silent Hill, Alan Wake area. Those are the ones I always am hoping to come out where it's something's wrong. I do they scare me a little too much. There's a great game that I play. I have to play them when it's light out. I'm in the state of purchasing a Wii U,

but I will say, zombie U. Oh my God, I'm a fucking believable zombie. I was literally just thinking. It was a zombie university. No, no, it's just called very good. No, they actually released a version of that for the Xbox and for the PS4. So zombie U was incredible because the Wii U controller

is like this huge touchscreen, and it was like your backpack and your controller is like this huge touch screen and it was like your backpack and your flashlight and all this other stuff and there were like when you used your flashlight you had to like hold it up right and you could only see through the screen like what was like night vision got so physical it was like that's cool thing that's cool it was really cool it was like the Wii mode but as if it was actually a bunch of stuff that actually helped you. Yeah, I wish I could get excited about the new Nintendo system, but I'm not. Oh, I'm excited.

The switch. Yeah, I like the idea of... It's like, we made a thing you can take with you. You can just carry it with you. I'm like giving me like my phone. I like the idea of the very polished Nintendo console that is a 3DS is a compromise. Like, it's just to play Pokemon at this point.

It's a total compromise system. The Wii U was a piece of garbage that had a 3DS is a compromise like it's just to play Pokemon at this point It's a total compromise system The Wii U was a piece of garbage that had a few good games It was like the idea of a polished iPad like a nice piece of hardware that I can play Nintendo games on it doesn't have to be like But Nintendo is like obsessed with this idea that they can just make a better controller Mm-hmm. So like what if the controller was weird? It's like what if you just made a regular controller and it was a really good system. What if you just made some really good Mario and like Pokemon stuff and put it on a PlayStation 4? No seriously. I mean the worst thing.

Well I think it for them would be very bad. Anyhow, have you been gaming for a long time? I think I play it started in high school. I think like Resident Evil maybe it was high school. I never told you my Philly theory. What's that? Well I believe the Philly is a locus of evil. I believe that it is a dark spot on the planet where all evil happens. I believe it is. There's a lot of ghosts there.

I am a total skeptic. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no roots and all kinds of amazing music. Oh no, but also I don't know Man, I had some bad experiences in Philly Philly. I know more people in the city. It's a gritty city I know more people have been mugged in Philly than like any other place when I was growing up It was not a we routinely I was in my house one time when we were robbed it were our car windows Yep our car windows Multiple times we arrived our cars got broken into. It was, it's better now, that's what I hear, than it was in the 80s and 90s.

But I think it's much nicer. It's a gritty, it's a gritty city. It still is, it's not, it's very number-boston. Boston. Boston, at least we can agree on that. Yeah, that's terrible. The best thing about Boston is that you know everyone's racist.

There's no need to do that. It's deliberate. They're all like, clean streets. They're all like, I just say everybody in Boston is exactly like Ben Affleck from Goodwill on to me. It's like all, all human beings. And all those streets like Quark screw into themselves and then change names.

And they're like, you don't know where you're going? They're like, you know how DC has the French battle, plan layout or whatever, Boston's like that, but without any of the plan part. It's just like roads that you're just wherever they go. Pittsburgh's kind of like that, actually, but it's very old. What do you think of Pittsburgh?

Beautiful city. Where in Pittsburgh are you from? Beautiful people. I'm from, well, when I was a young, a little kid, we lived in the North Hills, and then we would move to Squirrel Hill. I was about to guess. I lived in, well, they, you know, they call it Kikes Peak. Of course.

It's because there's a bunch of anti-Semitic and racist people there. But it's where a lot of Jewish people live, obviously. The, I actually lived in, we lived in Stanton Heights for a while, which is, I guess it's considered on the north side just for like a, and then we moved to Squirrel Hill. And that's where I really grew up. That's where I became this person. Did you go to school there? Technically not really.

Okay. Now I didn't really do a lot of schooling. Never went to school. Not a ton of school. I dropped out a high school nine. From Nancy Brothers? I've eaten it from Annie Brothers. You like it?

I mean, it's fine. They're fine. Yeah. I mean, I wouldn't say it's like, man, this is my favorite. I can't wait to. I've eaten it from any brothers. You like it? I mean, it's fine. They're fine. I mean, I wouldn't say it's like, man, this is my favorite. I can't wait to get home and eat some from any brothers. I do feel like in any city where you have that like, you gotta get the cheese steak here. You gotta, it's like, you actually go and it's like,

no. What do you do, Gina's patty? You know what you do? No, Gina's patty. What do you get? Jim's. Jim's is bullshit. Jim's the one that's in,

Jim's is on South Street. Yes, South Street. South Street, that's a fucking complete shit show. All right, we should probably wrap up I have no idea what this is about. I miss us. We went down a lot of paths. I love what you're talking about game The game actually in the to be honest with you I think that the people who list a lot of people is this are like nerdy. Yeah, I think they will be psyched about the fact that we talked about I'm excited to play far cry. You should play Far Cry. I would suggest three. Can I just jump into three? Do I have to play the other?

Yeah, I bought Far Cry three on Eagle Wim. Great. And I was like, oh, this, but I don't know if they have it for the Xbox One. They may have the 360 version, but the Far Cry four looks fucking amazing. And that hasn't come out yet. No, it's out. Oh, it is. Okay.

Yeah, you should start with that, whatever. It won't matter. Although I think the story is better in three. It's pretty bro-ish. It's like, it's a weird game. Cause it seems like it's for bros, but it's actually really thoughtful and interesting. I would suggest that you try the witcher again, cause I love it.

It's like, oh, it's funny. It's so beautiful. And what is up with always sunny and Philadelphia? What is the show? It's not made for me and I love it. I don't understand. I love it. It's been on for like nine seasons. Yeah, I've I love it. I don't understand, I love it. It's been on for like nine seasons.

Yeah, I've never seen it. I have seen it. I love it. You know, it's funny you say it's not made for me, but I love it. The thing is I watch it. It isn't for me and it's not exactly my sense of humor, but I have respect for it.

I'm like, they're doing something there. They're doing something like honorably and they're committing to their idea. And I don't think it's a bad one. I just am not like, oh my god, I'm crazy about it. But they're not, none of it's bad. It's another, it's a show that benefits like 30 Rock, where if you pulled an episode out and showed it to my daddy,

be like, this is just fine. But it's benefits from, if you watch every episode, like there's so much in jokes or weird references or like patterns of behavior, then become beats that, I think, I'm not saying go watch all nine seasons of it's not for you, but the people who've stuck with it for so long, it's like there's a whole episode, like there's an episode called,

just about one character and about how, like what happened if she ever succeeded at something? And you have to spend nine seasons with her complete object of failure. Oh, other thing. To like, I don't know. I don't get it. I really don't.

It's a part of it. I like any divino. It's a part of culture that I feel completely left out of. It's a little cult to eat. I feel like it's not everybody, but people who love that show love it passionately, but I don't feel like every like huge swaths of people are watching it. But you don't watch it. I've watched a couple episodes enough to be like, well, this is an interesting. It has a character all its own. You should make me as a person who would like the killing. I don't. You don't like the killing. No, I actually've never seen it. Oh, so you don't even know if you like it. No. Oh, I think you'd like the killing. The first season. It's got you can watch the whole thing through. It's not

the fall. I always know the fall. Do you like that? I gave up on that. So did I. Second season. I'm like, I'm sorry, you can't catch this guy. You're blowing. You're very bad at your job. I gave up on it. I really wanted to love it. I know Jamie Darnan very sexy man. I don't think that he necessarily pulls off some of the acting, which is what takes me to the other. Oh no, he's terrible. He's terrible in it. And it's also completely absurd.

Yes. It's like, oh yeah, this person who was just almost killed by the serial killer and like, no, there's no guards in her hospital room. So he's just showing up. Huh? Or whatever, it's so ridiculous. Now there's a third season.

I'm like, oh, they stood in catch them. I was like, certainly by the end of season two, they will have caught him. No. That is the mistake I think true crime shows make is where they're like, we could squeeze this out. I liked broad church, which just this, I guess, is the trial. Hey, spoiler alert. I don't think that ruins anything.

You're spoiling it for me. If it's somebody's trial. Broad church was fucking good. Great. The British one. Yes. Is there an American one? And it is it's somebody's right broad church was fucking good great the British one yes that american one is terrible there is a called broad church it was a network it was like abc or nbc's fos it was fox it was one of the worst adaptations i've ever seen but the

original broad churches saw the television did you see top of the lake yeah didn't love it i love it and i'm sorry i'm sorry you and police are very bad at their job very bad Yeah, they're like the kids gone. They're like I wrote whatever American please aren't batten a thousand You know what? Trump's America and Trump's America. They're gonna find all lost children and bring them to Trump from the Body shock feels Trump for review But you'll be dating you're gonna be dating. All children have to be 10. You, you're a five.

But I vote for you. You're flat. It's like, Trump, Mr. Trump, she's six. You're too flat anyhow. It's a bad situation. We shouldn't joke about it because this is real. This is a reality. Yeah.

Favorite movie of all time. The shining. Favorite TV show of all time. Wrong. Favorite color. Purple. Wow, interesting. What we're gonna say for TV show of all time. Wrong, favorite color. Purple. Wow, interesting. What were you gonna say for TV show? Yeah, what were you gonna say? Quick, easy one, the Simpsons.

And what not in my choice. It's not the one, it's the... I feel like the superannos. The superannos. Oh, so you like anything is like a tea that has an asswear after it. I think the superannos. The shining the Simpsons, the superannos.

That's what you give me so far. Okay, favorite song. I can think of an artist. That's not exactly what I'm talking about. Favorite song. I don't normally do this. No, I wish I could think of a my all time favorite song. I can think of it.

Really, you can't. Mamba number five. Lou Beggah. Lou Beggah is the artist. Lou Beggah is number five. I full 65. I'm blue. Blue baguette is the artist. Blue baguette is the artist. I'm about to write. I have a 65. I'm blue. Blue is called just called blue.

Blue is the color. The color that I wear. Oh, you know the lyrics to the IFA 65. Do you know that this guy's a Italian? It's an interesting twist. I've got. The only Italian pop act that's ever made in an all-around. A lot of Italian.

There's Italian. Right set of Fred Italian. No, they're Austrian. Are they? Yeah. They're European. Well Falco, Falco's Italian. No, he's Austrian too. No, they're Austrian. Are they? Yeah, or Austrian? European. Well Falco Falco's Italian. No, he's Austrian too. Yeah, he's Austrian. A lot of Austrians. Oh, a short-singer paved the way for Austrians. Wait, do you see Austrian? Yeah, Schwarzenegger's Austrian. What about Jean-Claude Van Damme? He's a Christophe

wall. Christophe Waltzes also Austrian. Mussels from Brussels. Yeah, the mussels from Brussels. He's a new shows called Jean-Claude Van Johnson. Yeah, where he's playing himself, right? It's sort of funny. I like the idea. I just didn't know whether he could pull it off. I'm like, are you good at a factor? Well, he didn't move you when he plays himself. Right. Call JCVD. But I'm like, he seems like such a not great actor that will be I would be okay. Good. He's very have you seen JCVD? Have you seen it? No, you should see it. Okay. It's very good. I saw it in the theater is it better or worse than blood sport? I'm I'm I'm they're totally different genres. I'm sure that I've ever actually seen blood sports I don't know that I have I just thought it was a funny reference blood sport is a film where he plays a kickboxer

Yes, I remember some seamer he jumps up with his legs on like a counter Yeah, he can split do split not to be confused with jayla's enough And I remember some team where he jumps up with his legs on like a counter. Yeah, he can split, do split. Not to be confused with Jela's enough. Yeah, that's good. I thought I'd be yours. She decided to take up kickboxing, because her... The protected match-hives.

And you know what? Couple of Tybo classes and domestic violence isn't a problem. I don't want to... No spoilers. I don't want to be that guy, but... No, but that's racist. Okay, it's not Tybo. It's not a kickboxing Oh, the movie was very unclear on what

But typos like an exercise isn't it? Yeah, but I mean she's Yeah, yeah, is typo based on a person named typo first name tie last day. No, his name is Billy blanks The guy Billy blanks. I think Billy blanks are from Pittsburgh uh... billy blanks if you want to Wikipedia journey where's Billy blanks from is he from eerie or Pittsburgh or it might be from I remember he's from the

I went down a wickipedia hole reading about him recently really fascinating blanks the cool name he has like a million kids and then he got obsessed with Japanese culture moved to japan for a while left his wife of like thirty years and married the woman

who's translating for him in Japan and now half of his children you speak for him. He is from eerie. That's cool. You know who else from eerie? Sharon Stone. She's actually from McCain, which is just outside of eerie. I know this because I think it's maybe it's me. Is your favorite celebrity from Pittsburgh?

I already know mine. Oh, there are quite a few. I know. There are quite a few. I know. There are quite a few. Yes. Jeff Goldblum. He's up there for me, but Michael Keaton is my favorite. I love Michael Keaton.

Yeah. I'm Michael Keaton. Both great. I love it. I don't know if you follow my, I'm obsessed with Michael Keaton. Follow him on Instagram and Twitter. Oh, no, he uses it. I don't know if I want that.

I don't think I want that. Yes, you do, because it's like your favorite nice uncle. He takes pictures of his own TV watching the pirates and is like, go Bob. So like Tom Hanks, but it's none of the training. But like, he's really. I actually, it's very charming. I, Mike Keaton's great and I don't want to follow him

on Instagram. I don't want to follow anybody on social media's over. Okay. To me, it's the end. And some people, it's a nice extension. I like seeing Sarah Jessica Parker look at Manhattan. What? Then there are times when I'm like,

I like Sarah Jessica Parker. I follow her. Yeah, I follow her. I follow her Instagram. I follow her Instagram. Oh, I follow her Instagram. I follow her Instagram. I follow her Instagram.

I follow her Instagram. I follow her Instagram. I follow her Instagram. I follow her Instagram. I follow her Instagram. I follow her Instagram. I follow her Instagram. I follow her Instagram. I follow her Instagram. I follow her Instagram reason. I like Deborah messing a lot on Instagram. Oh, Deborah messing's Twitter account,

it just keeps giving. She is not shy about showing her son on Instagram constantly. What is that man? Well, her son is very, I'm always curious about celebrities and like, do they shield their children like privacy? Like, do they not want them? But I'm like, I hope he's like a confident and cool kid because I like him, I want the best for him.

But he's like 11 or something, and he's all, she's like millions of followers. It because I like him, I want the best for him. But he's like 11 or something, and he's all, she's like millions of followers. It's like, mom, look what I can do. I got twice a day. Yeah, definitely. I definitely would be not psyched about seeing her 11 year old kid.

That's getting into the age. He's a boy. He's going to age range for boys where it's like do not show me that thing. I don't want to see it. He clearly is like a little performer. Put him away for two years to be driving. I also think a mom was on set of mysteries of law for 13 hours and when she came home

I have to show her something yes yes a little of that little dude I love her follow her on Twitter this week she said someone said maybe Susan Sarandon because they're political rivals can get on the new episode of the new Will and Grace and play your old high school friend and she's like she's way too old she's like flat out. She's dope. I'm sorry. I think the number of messing is kind of cool.

I like her a lot. That does make a lot of sense though. I think they are age wise or way off track or whatever. And yeah, Emily, it's been a real pleasure having you here. Pleasure. I feel like we just started to crack many topics that I would like to talk about more. It's favorite celebrities. Yeah.

Video games. Trump. Like we didn't really fully. What's favorite celebrities. Yeah. Video games. Trump. Like we didn't really fully explore. What's your favorite song? Can you just tell me your favorite song? No, I'm curious about that. People just having a favorite song. Happy birthday to you.

I love the song. No. Favorite song. You asked me. Yeah. I mean, there's so many great songs out there. There's this Brian No Songong, Mother Will Iless from the record taking Tiger Mountain by Shraddaji.

You know, five favorite songs is very tough. Is that my favorite song? Well, it's done. You answered it to the record. You answered it to the record. You over and over again and never get bored of. It's done, you already gave your option. Turned out to every one.

Turned out to every one. Please, please. Too many bad horrible memories now. Yeah, I think bad horrible memories now. Yeah, I think that's my favorite. It's up there. There's a lot of beautiful music out in the world. I know. Anyhow, it's been great having you here.

Thank you so much. Now we can look for your writing on a new season of difficult people. Difficult people and big mouth to look for advertisements and stuff about it probably in the spring. You'll start hearing about it. And then sometime next, your broad strokes. Broad strokes is good.

Yeah. About two young women who are adopted by a rich aunt or a church party. They go to a Coke party where they're molested by Donald Trump. Which is exactly who's ready to talk to that, and nothing else, which sounds exactly okay. Oh, yeah. Hey, you know, everything's gonna be all right. I feel like we're gonna get through this together. Okay, I think we are all hopefully are gonna survive.

We have to be stronger together. We do, for Hillary. Anyhow, thank you for coming, for doing this podcast. And you have to come back, we should do a check in like six months in, how's the country how you doing yeah and so you've got and you've got a bunch of new shows we can watch if if if everything seems too horrible you can just binge watch shows that you've written yes that's great so thanks thanks for being here of course thanks for having me

Well, that is our show for this week. We'll be back next week with more. And as always, I wish you and your family the very best. But I gotta tell you, it's gonna be very, very difficult for your family to get the very best. Given the current situation, this country is in.