Toni and Ryan - 55 Gallons of Lube

Episode Date: June 2, 2024

A review we're not quite sure about to be honest! Love u!!!! xxoxoxCheck out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toniandryanpodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast. My name is Ryan. This is Dr. Author Tony Lodge. Hello. It's Tony and Ryan. We're calling Jocelyn in Canada. Oh, Big J. That's what I call it. Oh, I was like Canada, Big J. Yep, Jocelyn. Yep. Yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep.

Hello. Jocelyn! It's Tony and Ryan. How are you doing? Hi, guys. I'm good. How are you? We are very well. Now, I believe you're studying at the moment.

When you finish studying, what are you going to have? I'm going to have a pretty huge deck. A PhD. Oh, what course are you doing? Ryan would love to do that. He'd love to finish uni with a PhD. I don't know if he'd get accepted. He wouldn't get accepted.

Oh, yeah, that's fair. Yeah, he's been blackmarked around Melbourne as well, around the Union Swinburne. Studying towards a PSD. Yeah, you've already got that, mate. You don't have to study for a pretty small degree. Joslyn, what are you studying? I'm studying organizational psychology.

You're right. Ryan wouldn't fucking get accepted into that. You have to be organized, surely. Considering the Tony and Ryan workplaces comprised of Tony and Ryan and James and Sophie, any advice for us on how we work together or anything? Oh. Yeah. I mean, at my work, the motto that we all kind of run with is just don't be a dick.

And that seems to work pretty well. Yeah, that is. I mean, it's a low fucking bar, isn't it? But yes, I agree. And you know what? Imagine studying a whole PhD. Is that the title of your PhD thesis? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's actually just those are the only four words in it. Just repeat it over and over again. Reference? right yeah reference me on the tony and ryan podcast will you approve today's show of course i will yeah don't be a dick yeah well done hey it's jocelyn from halifax can Canada, and I approve the Tony and Ryan podcast. I need some advice from a doctor on today's show. You've come to the right place, Dr. Tony Lodge. The doctor will see you now. And if anyone else has some medical questions,

I'm sure Tony will be able to help out, put them in the thread. We'll get to it in another episode. But I've got something. I've heard a medical rumor and I was like, I need to check this with a real doctor. So, Tony, I've got a question for you coming up today. I'm actually, look, I know that we don't do pranks, but also we keep the podcast pretty light. Yep.

I'm so touched that you're finally taking my title seriously as a doctor. And you will be touched by me. I'd love that. But first, if you or anyone you know is considering buying a 55-gallon drum of lube, let today's episode be a word of warning. 55-gallon drum of lube. Like a wine barrel size. Yeah.

That's like what they put like fires in, isn't it? Like 55-gallon drum. Yep. I've got an Amazon review. I'm going to read it and we will do what we will with that information. But first, Toni, are you a review reader? I am. You are a review reader.

It fits into my character persona very well, I feel. I am a review reader. But do you know what? I'm the worst type of review reader because reviews are like a circular economy. I think if you want to read reviews, you have to be a review lever, like pay it forward. So are you saying that if I am not review lever, don't contribute to the review, then I shouldn't get to read them?

And that's what I am. I read them all. Like I'll read 100 reviews of something before I spend any money. Before 10 p.m. Then it's just a free-for-all. Then who knows? The credit card flies out the window. But if I, I'll read them all, but I rarely leave a review.

You are very nice and don't like to say a bad word about anyone. Yeah. So when you get something that isn't great, where do you stand with like on one side I want to help people out but on the other side I don't want to be mean. Like how do you reconcile that? But because I don't leave reviews that often, I don't really need to figure it out. And I think there's a scale for me on how much it costs. So if something wasn't very expensive and it's like not really great,

I go, well, like egg on my face, I spent $20 on this thing that should have been $200. I spent $7 on a T-shirt and after the 10th wash, it shrunk a little bit. Well, you're probably going to fucking get that with a $7 T-shirt. 10 washes though, that's generous. And I'm just a generous guy. Yeah.

But, like, I- Bea, you've already answered the question. So, what if you really don't like something? Well, I bought something, like, kind of recent- Well, a few months ago that I actually posted on Instagram. I was like- And it was in the background of something. And a bunch of people were like, where's that from?

And I was like, it's from Blah. Only recently got it, like- And it wasn't sponsored or anything. Like, I paid for it with my own money. something and a bunch of people like where's that from and i was like it's from blah only recently got it like and it wasn't sponsored or anything like i paid for it with my own money and now i'd kind of love to post and be like oh i posted about this a few months ago it's actually shit have you done that i haven't because it's like i i didn't give a false like i wasn't paid to give a review and i didn't say whether it was good or bad. I guess my follow-up question because it seems like your answer is I'm not going to say anything bad. Yeah, so I probably wouldn't. I'd tell people privately. But in a Tony economy is that if you're only posting good reviews

and not posting the bad reviews then that kind of impacts the system and the circularness. It does. But I think though that people get really revved up about a bad review and I think it's a bit unfair. Like these zero stars, like, oh, it wasn't perfect, three and a half, and people are like, it wasn't perfect, fucking burn this place to the ground. Yeah, like I don't think you've got to burn the place to the ground

just because you cheaped out on something that you probably should have spent more money on. Yep, yep. Like, do you know what? I think it's a sliding scale. Are you in the market for a 55-gallon drum of personal lube? Do you know what? I actually wish you'd brought this up last week because I already know.

Big weekend, mate. No, I'm not in the market. Even as a doctor in my – that feels like something maybe a doctor would buy, but no, I'm not in the market currently. Are you? Is that how you found this? It doesn't matter how I found it. I'm just going to read this review.

Settle in. Okay. Settled. We were doing a backyard carnival-style birthday party for my seven-year-old Crispin. Yeah. It was the perfect day until we brought out the slip and slide. I'm a risk analyst for a major insurance firm,

so when hosting a party, I naturally turned my mind to legal liabilities. Yeah, yeah, and because you probably got like a bunch of kids from your child's school. Yep. So you go, oh, maybe meeting the parents for the first time of all the other kids and stuff. Take care of everything.

Yeah, yep. Our house is on a clifftop near San Francisco and on the day of the party, everything was perfect except for our neighbour was trimming his ficus tree and the sound of the wood chipper buzzing was a bit of a buzz kill. Irritating. Sorry, there's just so many random details. So is it essential that we know it was a ficus tree? Ficus benjamina.

Do you know what I mean? That's crazy. That's just like a crazy detail to add in. Sorry. Irritating but not disruptive. Okay. The party started off wonderfully. Great.

Children love the swing set. They love the trampoline and they love the merry-, and they love the merry-go-round. A merry-go-round in your backyard. A clown we hired made balloon animals. Cool. Crispin eagerly opened his presents, and all the children enjoyed the cake and the fruit punch. Beautiful.

Then the slip and slide came out. The problem with slip and slides is what we call in the trade distributed water deficiency zones or in layman terms dry spots. If a child hits one of these, because imagine you're going fast and you hit a dry spot, I can hit the brakes on the fun and send them sliding down a path of contortions, concussions, lacerations, abrasions, and whiplash. I have a scar on my leg from coming off a slip and slash.

You know about dry spots. I got a huge stick in my leg. Yeah, Christy DeBergwears, dad had to take it out of my leg. That sounds fucking harrowing. Yeah, I think you can still say it. Do you want to say? Yep. That big scar there? Yeah, it think you can still say it. Do you want to say? Yep. That big scar there?

Yeah, it was fucking in my fucking leg. That's pretty fucked up, but spoiler alert, probably not one of the top 15 injuries we're about to hear in this story. Oh, shit. To avoid the remote possibility of a dry spot, I invested in a 55-gallon drum of water-soluble personal lubricant. The idea being that the children could enjoy the slide in complete safety and then wash off with a hose before their parents came to retrieve them. Safety.

You're lubing kids up and throwing them on a tarp. With that in mind, I dipped each child into the vat of lube before allowing them onto the slide for safety reasons, as we've outlined already. The slip and slide performed admirably, as did the lubricant. That, in fact, was the problem. Due to the slight downhill gradient of our yard, the children built up so much speed that when they got to the end

of the slip and slide, skidded across the lawn and into the retaining wall, which ended up doing damage to the property and one of the legs of the young kids. Sure. No, but don't you send one kid down and you go, let's not do that again? Yeah. So that's when I decided to put an end to the activity. Thank God.

Okay. Yep. Even though there was no more slip and sliding, there was still a party of lubed up seven year olds hyped up on sugar and desperate for fun. And no Farkas Benjamina. That had been trimmed. Twins Jeremy and Mason Lafferty were on the swing set, but due to the lube, we're having.

Sorry, I'm struggling, yeah. Because of the lube, we're having difficulties holding on to the swings. Well, wasn't the plan to hose them off? Well, no, but like because they've just got cancel everyone off, go do something else. We'll hose them off before the parents came. But, you know, they're like, all right, let's go on the swings.

Jeez. So Jeremy and Mason Lafferty, the twins, were on the swing set. At one. They're full names. They had so much difficulty holding on that the swing set became human catapults. Mason separated on the backswing, so when he was going back, flew off the swing, over the roof of the house and towards the street.

No bull fucking shit that happened. I surmised from the screeching tyres, car horns and screams of horror that both he and multiple cars were written off. No, no fucking way. A terrified Jeremy, after hearing what happened to his brother, also slipped, but instead of slipping on the back, he slipped on the front and swung off the cliff, plummeting 300 feet into the ice-cold,

shark-infested waters of San Francisco Bay. Is this someone's creative writing challenge for year five? The rest of the children were clinging on to the merry-go-round. Okay, pause. Having just witnessed the violent deaths of at least two of their playmates, they were no longer in the mood for fun. However, the lubricant had dripped from their glistening bodies into the central cog of the merry-go-round, allowing it to spin faster than it was designed to.

And this, likely with a combination of factors due to the relative weight distribution and slight incline of the ground, caused their motion to become self-sustaining. They became blurry and a screaming disc of human suffering. They begin to fly off like cannonballs. America around goes like 2Ks an hour. Yeah, when it hasn't got-

Oh, the lubricated cog. Apologies. Yeah. Martin Duckworth is first to go. Oh, I bet. Causing significant- Well, Mason and Jeremy are fucking dead, so- Yeah, causing significant structural damage to the greenhouse.

and dead. Yeah, causing significant structural damage to the greenhouse. Liza O'Reilly shattered a line of ceramic garden gnomes and Ethan Green slammed into our Audi Q7 so hard it was probably going to be written off tragically just as he was. Several other children left what looked like a gingerbread man indentations in the side of our house it was terrifying when the wheel finally came to a stop there was only one single child left on the merry-go-round

as luck would have it it was our own beloved crispin oh crispin huddled in the center of the merry-go-round so he didn't fly off because he was like just in the middle my wife ran to him and hugged him with all his might with all their might relieved like a traumatized you know any traumatized parent would be oh you've just seen 20 kids die yes the tightest squeeze of a hug ever turns out the hug was a little too tight. He slipped out like a hot dog in a barn on a hot summer's day. Lubricated as he was, he shot from her arms like, you know when you grip a wet bar of soap and it just shoots out the top? Yeah. He flew 15 feet into the air,

landed on the trampoline, bounced over the hedge, over the ficus and into the wood chipper next. If that ficus benjamina hadn't been trimmed, Crispin would still be here today. Since then, I've asked myself a thousand times, is there anything I could have done differently? No, there's not. Some things are just an act of God, aren't they?

Well, and nothing. Some things are unavoid act of God, aren't they? Well, and nothing. Some things are unavoidable. As dry as you might. I can only conclude that it was an act of God and that to me is truly terrifying because our insurance does not cover that. And he'd know as an insurance deployer or whatever the fuck job. Two out of five stars. You know some days when you go, fuck, I wish I didn't come to work today.

I don't know that feeling. So why do we hear that fake horrible tale? It's not fake. I'll send you the link. Oh, well, it's online. It must be real. I just thought if – all right. So this is a review.

Imagine if I didn't tell you that and then this weekend you were like, fuck, maybe I'll get that 55-gallon drum and personalized lube. Yeah. And fucking having – Yeah, no, that's actually such a good point. You've got to keep your friends safe. Thank God. Thank you so much.

Yeah, no, that's actually such a good point. You've got to keep your friends safe. Thank God. Thank you so much. I feel like, as I said, reviewing is a circular economy and you can't be taking the piss out of people like this. What are you saying? Do you think the family of Jeremy and Mason Lafferty would appreciate your taking the piss?

What do you think Martin Duckworth's parents? There's a five-star review for the same product, dear. Such a great product. Such a great product. Definitely will bang me buck on this. Everyone's on board, I think, with taking the piss out of this. Are you saying I didn't read the best comment? Because yours seemed to be a lot easier to read and got a lot more laughs.

Hey, it's Jocelyn from Halifax, Canada and you're listening to Tony and Ryan. A massive shout out to a few of our champion darpers over at our Patreon. Read the reviews, though. Renee Dobson, good on you, Renee. Emma Bob. Charles Patterson, good on you, Charles.

Zach Nemick, the big name. And Jessica Wardlaw, good on you guys. Thank you very much. If anyone would like to leave a review of this podcast on Apple Podcasts. Oh, because you can actually type something out. Yeah, and be inspired by the review you just heard. I want you to say, like, the reason I know this is the greatest podcast ever is because, and really just fucking give it a crack.

Ham it up. Yeah. That's great, actually. I look forward to reading those. I need a doctor. I need a doctor. Doctor, doctor is what I need. Hey, hey.

Well, you got one, baby. I'm more slippery than that slip and slide. Same. You think you're slippery. Feel my nipples. Would you like to touch my back? Would you like to touch my back? Yes.

Yeah, I'll touch it. I touched it the day you got it done. Yeah, I had my back waxed last week. Probably twice a year. Take a little bit of the fluff off the shoulders. Does it just make you got it done. Yeah, I had my back waxed last week, probably twice a year. Take a little bit of the fluff off the shoulders. Does it just make you feel like, you know when like you get your hair cut and you feel like a new woman, but where are we going to find one this time of night?

But, you know, sorry. It was more just I was going away for the weekend. There was swimming and hot tubs and fucking whatever and I just felt a bit self-conscious about like a little bit of fluff on the shoulders. I'm like, I'll just take care of that. Nothing wrong with body hair, but I understand you wanting to do it for you.

Yeah. Do you just get the back or do you do the back crack and sack? No, like I put back sack and crack in the calendar and it's funny because Tony and everyone can see my calendar. That's funny. Yeah. But to be honest, and I don't, the irony, but I don't have the balls to do a back sack and crack

because it just sounds terrible. You do have a hairy butt though. Would you think about doing it? What? You've told me that. I've told you. You've told me that. Sorry, in confidence maybe.

Do you just do the top of your shoulders or is it your full back no full back full back yeah and you welcome Matt as well a little welcome Matt that'll take care of you do you welcome Matt as well

show me you welcome Matt I know you're welcome anytime but we're working but the thing the thing about having like a slightly hairy butt is like you have to like kind of like

where do you draw the line you know where does the butt end and the back begin yeah yeah so what have you got a little zigzag a little lightning bolt just to like really I don't know, like, where do you draw the line, you know? Where does the butt end and the back begin? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So, what have you got? A little zigzag, a little lightning bolt just to, like,

really remind you where it is. Maybe I should get the welcome mat into a lightning bolt. I would. Or, like, a butterfly, like, where people get the tramp stamp. Yes. So, I'm a bit of a pansy when it comes to getting the wax. Like, you know, it hurts a little bit. Well, it does hurt.

But I'm also aware that like other people probably get in more painful spots so maybe i should just shut the fuck up no because your pain is still your pain and that's fine so the lady says because i kind of went and i said oh sorry i'm a bit of a pain but just you know do your thing and i'll fucking just get over it you don't need to feel bad for being in pain when you're literally doing something that hurts. Oh, no, it was more like because other times they're like, oh, do you want a break or is that okay? Or they feel a bit bad and I kind of went, hey. No, I'll just, I'll cop it.

All good. Yeah, so just get it done. And she was actually quick. It was like. Yeah. And she goes, oh, geez, yeah, it hurts a bit. She goes, did you not have Panadol or Nurofen before you came in? And I went, no.

And she goes, oh, everyone has Panadol or Neurofen before getting a wax. And I recommend that to every single person that comes in and they all do it. Oh. And then I went, does that work? Is that a real thing? Hence why I need to ask a doctor Well, I mean

Panadol and Nurofen are different So like Nurofen is like ibuprofen Whereas Panadol is like paracetamol Yeah Nurofen is like a blood thinner Is that not what you want? Which is Wouldn't that make

If you bled when you were getting a wax Yeah It would make you bleed like worse Because it's the same for like Is that not what you want? Which is, wouldn't that make, if you bled when you were getting a wax, it would make you bleed worse because it's the same for like, so after I got tattooed last week, where I got it done was really fucking painful and afterwards it's been really swollen. Like I couldn't really walk properly for a couple of days. And you're not supposed to take Nurofen because it thins the blood so it can affect like healing and stuff. Because if you start bleeding and you need to like clot your blood up,

it won't. So I thought it was more like to numb the muscles and stuff around it. But that's not what would happen, is it? Well, that's why I'm glad I asked a doctor. Well, I mean, I'm not a – I am a doctor. No, no, no. Sorry, I am a doctor. Thank you., no. Sorry, I am a doctor. Thank you.

I don't think that that would work, would it? It would work after. I guess this – I'm kind of like, oh, I get why in theory, but I'm like, I don't know. I don't want to tell you how to do your job. I don't want to tell a doctor how to do her job, but I just feel like – I don't know that norepinephrine or paracetamol are effective enough to even do what she's suggesting it would do yeah so you can just get waxed willy-nilly and it's like i can't even feel a thing had a panadol before yeah

i don't think that's how that works yeah well it's like when someone goes oh i've got this hack for a hangover yeah and like i sip this juice and then they drink a thousand beers and go no it didn't work i'm like yeah well they drink a thousand beers and go, no, it didn't work. I'm like, yeah, well, like sometimes. Like a thousand beers, there's a limit to like what's going to be effective. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Okay. Glad I cleared that with a doctor. Yeah, so I don't think that that would work. That's bad medical advice. I needed a doctor. She obviously didn't go to the same medical school that I went to. I also need a security expert. Oh, well, that's me.

I lock everything all the time. That's what I thought. Yeah. So we got something delivered to the studio the other day and I wasn't here and Tony goes, oh, all good. I'm really good at doing your signature. And then you showed me my signature and I went, that is a good Ryan signature that you you did i can't even tell the

difference awesome is what i thought and then 0.24 seconds later i went not awesome so security expert i want to know is this good news or bad news because it's actually kind of handy that i don't have to be here we can share the load of who's waiting for a delivery. Well, so this one in particular, normally with a delivery, I would never do like because normally. I would never sign anything. No, no, no, no, no. Because normally they just say like who's receiving it

and you can be yourself. Right. Like you don't have to be the person that's on the package. But with this, it was actually returning something. Right. And so you had to say But with this, it was actually returning something. Right. And so you had to say like, yep, it was me. And this thing has been a bit of a fuck around. It has.

And it was like, and this day that I happened to, I was like, yep, I can be in to take care of that. That's fine. How did you get that? Have you been practicing over time? Do you just have an eye for going, okay, there's like a round in the R and that Y has got a loop. Yep.

Cool. Like where did you pick up this skill? Because you know how in Prison Break like he practises and does a lot of preparation before he goes into jail? Yeah. Like have you been. Such a strange reference. But have you been practising and preparing for this moment

for many years in advance? Because it just looked like more than a off the cuff willy-nilly because it was just it was so fucking bang on and i actually didn't even say to you that i did it i said oh and here's that receipt and you went okay and i went i did a good job didn't i and you went yeah yeah if you hadn't told me i would have assumed I signed it. That you'd signed that. Yeah, even though you weren't here. I don't question the methods. Yeah, okay.

Method to the madness, whatever they say. I think we've just signed a lot of paperwork together. Like when we start our business, we've like opened bank accounts. Our business? Yeah, we do have a business. In this economy. Yeah, I know. In SD economy.

Yeah. We've signed a lot of paperwork together. So you're saying you've seen my signature? I've just seen your signature a lot. And were you like, oh, okay, if I had to do that, I'd have a chance. No, literally no. But when I had to sign the thing for the people to take it, I was like, I could do that.

I could replicate that. Now, should I? I used to copy my mum's onto my reading my reading um table so like i've been practicing for years so i had to be like well it's been a few years since i've had to do my mom's obviously she's not signing for anything well maybe she is maybe that's how she's doing it yeah um well when you're 30 years of old you still have to like yes tony has read her books yeah what but like in the day it was like oh did you how many pages did you read overnight, whatever, and I would. Fudge it.

Yeah. Speaking of which. Well, maybe I'd forget to get her to sign it and in the morning I'd be like, oh, I'll just quickly do it. Today's the first episode of June. At the start of the first episode of 2024, you said you were going to read 20 books this year. Yeah.

And I said, oh, you'd hate to get to June and have only read five. No, I'm up to eight. Do you have proof for me, Mum? That's really fucked up. It was more of a signing joke. That's really fucked up because she's dead. All right. I actually can't believe that you would do that to me.

Thanks for reminding me on the 3rd of June, which was a really special day to her. Well, maybe I'll call you on your 0408 number and let you know what jokes are and are not appropriate. You know how to get back in. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All good. Yeah, that's what I thought.

That's what I thought. So should I be concerned or not is my question for a security expert. Panadol, no. Yeah. Me forging your signature, it meant that you didn't have to come in. Yeah. But like do I have like a second mortgage on your house now? You know what I'm saying?

No, no, no. I'd never do it. Oh, my repayments are down and yours have gone up. I wonder what's happened then. Yeah. Yeah, I'm saving heaps of money. No, I don't think I would ever do it in like a professional capacity because someone-

Well, it's not professional about returning a mattress that was supposed to be a chair. Well, I mean- Thanks to the good folks at Insert Company here. Yeah. But I mean imagine if you were in business with someone. Don't. No, actually.

And they forged your signature. I don't believe that. That's never happened in the history of business. So, I mean, that would just be disgusting. It would be disgusting. Yeah. And you'd probably be owed like a number I can't even say out loud. Yeah, you'd probably even start your own podcast, wouldn't you?

You would. Yeah, you wouldn't stay there. What would you call it? Yeah, who knows? Yeah, no? I didn't even think of that. Do you know what I'm saying? Yeah, I do not hear what you're saying. I've got a great You Love To See It here. So you're saying I've done podcasts with multiple people who have forged my signature?

Just the two, I think. As far as I'm aware. That's great to know. None of mine were with the tax office. Actually, I've got some more crazy coincidence chat from My You Love To See It. Considering the coincidence you just brought up. Yeah. This is a story from the weekend. And actually, considering...

Yeah. Considering how much you love my Amazon review, you're probably going to also love this story. Amazing. Someone... Fuck me. This is the shittest story ever. I regret putting this as my upset someone had a shocking

coincidence over the weekend not their name oh great on saturday this bloke had to buy a motor bike for himself and a piano he's like what do you got on today he's like well i've been meaning to get that motorbike and i have to get a piano for my daughter oh great um don't want to get the order mixed up yeah no so the bloke buys a motorbike from Yamaha. Yep. And he pays the lady. And, you know, she goes, oh, okay, thanks for that, mate. You know, enjoy that motorbike.

What else have you got on today? And he goes, oh, I actually have to find a piano. Do you know where I can find a piano? And she goes, you're not going to believe it. And she goes, you're not going to believe it. What's the coincidence? What is it? Has anyone actually ever thought about the fact that Yamaha sell the weirdest range of shit?

It's like that brand Bic. They sell ladies' razors and those pens that you can't choke on. Isn't that wild? You ever seen Vic and Yamaha in the same room together? Have you ever seen someone motorcycling carrying a piano? My flute's a Yamaha. Is it? Yeah, it is, yeah.

Wow, wow, wow. So I'm just fluting away on my fucking motorbike playing the grand piano. Well, anyway, the lady says, have I got some fucking news for you. Fuck me. Okay. I've actually embarrassingly also have this story that went a little bit viral. And it is great coincidence chat. It's very beautiful coincidence chat.

Karen and Kaylee, our beautiful brides-to-be, a jeweler has posted this. Yeah. Both contacted us by email for their very special engagement ring commissions within days of each other with the exact same, like, brief for each other. Right. So both of these ladies were like, I want to propose to my girlfriend and they emailed the same jeweler around the exact same time with the same brief for each other. All right.

Now, I don't want to accuse you of coincidence chat after what I just said. I already said I'm doing coincidence chat. Yeah, but I just, it's a lot, isn't it? What? Please continue. The limit does not exist. This is such a sweet story.

Yep. So these two ladies both were getting ready to propose to each other. They emailed the same jeweler. How did they find out? What do you mean? Like, how did it play out? Well, I'm guessing. Because the jeweler's sitting on two fucking like, she's like, well, I can't.

Well, I think that the jeweler was like, oh, my God. Because they've obviously said, for my beautiful partner, blah. And they went, oh. But are they in an awkward spot? Why is that awkward? Oh, because they call in and they go, oh, is that that one or the other one? And they went, oh. Are they in an awkward spot? Why is that awkward? Because they call in and they go, oh, is that that one or the other one? And they go, oh, what do you mean? And you go, nothing.

Oh, well, I guess you'd have to be careful. That's what I mean. Yeah, yeah. They go, oh, really? Oh, shocker. Great idea. Yeah. But can you imagine, like, that's a crazy secret.

That is crazy. Yeah. But then, and then there's a beautiful photo of both girls with their beautiful rings on that so they've both said yes and they're on the beach with their little doggy now i just can't believe that they did it at the same time same jeweler that's so crazy i do have some advice for the ladies what don't let future, for your next proposal, don't let the golden retriever be in that photo because he is the happiest boy. He's taking too much attention from the beautiful rings

and the beautiful smiles. No, all three of them are very happy. But he's too cute. But I think that the doggy should have gotten a little diamond as well. Yeah. Make him feel included. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I just thought that was such a sweet story.

That is great. Who doesn't love an engagement story on steroids, two at a time? Yep. Isn't that just crazy? Do you think about that being, like, if you were in a same-sex relationship and you go, oh, well, there are, like, no rules with who can ask who, do you think you'd be like, oh, well, I really want to ask them first? Like, I want to beat them to the punch?

Yeah. This is just such a nice story and I thought, like, it made me really happy. They just all look so happy. And I love coincidence chat. Yeah, great, great, great. Well, tomorrow we were going to do coincidence chat, but I think we've covered that off for the week. No, I don't. No, I love it. There's never enough.

Coincidence, though, that both of us did coincidence chat for hours. You'll have to see it. Coinception. Is that the ultimate coincidence chat? That is. Coinception. That is. All right, we'll be back tomorrow.

Speaking of coincidence, we just talked about deliveries and we're about to get another one. Let's get it. All right. Love you. Bye.