Toni and Ryan - BEDROOM and also in the BEDROOM

Episode Date: October 3, 2022

Very meta, but we stand by it. Also I have sustained an injury which requires attention. (Emotional attention not medical attention lol) Love u Check out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

As women, our life stages come with unique risk factors, like when our estrogen levels drop during menopause, causing the risk of heart disease to go up. Know your risks. Visit heartandstroke.ca. Welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast. We're chatting to Megan. I'm Tony. I'm Ryan.

Chatting to Megan. Not that Megan. Not that Megan. Not the Megan we spoke'm Tony. Chatting to Megan. Not that Megan. Not that Megan. Not the Megan we spoke about yesterday. Or is it? I don't think it is. Hello? Hi, is that Megan? Yes. Hey, it's

Tony and Ryan. Will you approve this podcast? Oh my God, of course I will. I didn't think you guys would get a call. Oh, Megan, we're so, so late because Ryan. It's Tony's fault. Tony's late. I would never be late. Sorry.

Nah, look, that's all right, guys. I'm just so glad you called. Thank you. You make my day every day. Oh, Megan, you make our day. Thank you. Now, Megan, on yesterday's episode, I told a story about a Megan that I used to hang out with back in the day.

That he fingered with his penis. And would you just confirm that you are, in fact, a different Megan? I am, but I do have, like, spa fingering stories and things like that when I was 15 or 16 drinking Passion Pop. So, look, it could have been, but it was a different Megan. Are you sure? Thank you for clarifying that. Was it Ryan?

Megan on the other end of the fingering? No. I actually can't remember his name. So it could have been him. Good to catch up. Could have been. He was a bit older, though. You wouldn't forget those fingers, Megan.

Let me tell you. No. Apparently not. Well, I think we can all agree that the first minute of this podcast episode was probably the best and it's all downhill from here. Coming up next, who cares? Hardly. Oh, Megan, that's so funny.

I'm sparse. Hi, it's Megan from Melbourne, and I bloody approve this podcast. What is it that you do as a hobby? Because a lot of people like to do crafts. And, Tony, is it fair to say that you want to be a craft person but have often lacked the motivation or the time or needing that reason to get the craft stuff out? Yes, it's the reason for me that I'd love to sit down

and just enjoy crafting something, but I need a purpose. And you've found one? I found a purpose late at night. Okay. And I need to maybe find another hobby. All right, we'll get to that soon. But first, and I know this is a bit meta and a bit inception, but this is things you can say in the bedroom and also in the bedroom.

In the bedroom. Before anyone comes for us and says, have you run out of ideas? They already have. We have. And, yeah, so if you've got any great ideas for an in the bedroom. In the bedroom. Before anyone comes for us and says, have you run out of ideas? They already have. We have. And, yeah, so if you've got any great ideas for in the bedroom segment for next week, we'd love to hear them. Hey, no, this is a great one. No, it actually was lots of fun to write and to think about.

But, yeah, if anyone's got any ideas, we'd love to hear them. Some too. Oh, hope you got insurance health insurance before i lay you down i just want you to know it's firm oh oh good because i prefer a real firm one to a soft one if you know what i'm saying yeah probably won't be firm for long though oh that's okay. It happens to everyone. After a few minutes of it, it gets pretty soft.

Do you need a hand putting the protector on? Sometimes it flicks off the edges, you know? Yeah. Fucking bull. Look out. That would be great, actually. Thank you. Yeah, good.

I just like to help be hospitable when you're in my bedroom. How would you like it tucked in? Hotel corners. Could you knock? Oh, yeah, come in. What was the knock for? Because that would be like, can I come in? I thought just like before Torbs is ready, that's like his signal.

No. Just knock when it feels good. Yeah. Tony, are you awake? I am now. I might not be awake, but I know something that will get you up. You don't have that in a larger size, do you? No.

One size fits all. Fits some. Some. We'll fill some space. Maybe I'll just look after you instead. I think I like it up against the wall. Do you? Okay.

Well, if the bed's in the middle of the room. Yeah. Fence way, the pillows fall off the back. Fence way. Do you normally do this naked? Do you sleep naked? I sleep in a nightie. I've seen. When I came around that morning and I woke in a nightie. I've seen.

When I came around that morning and I woke you up. Yeah. With your cock. You woke me up to finger me. Hey, this is a bit embarrassing. What? Sorry about the Dutch oven. That is embarrassing.

I would be embarrassed. Sometimes these things slip out and that's okay. It doesn't mean it's good. Every time I'd said that. things slip out and that's okay. It doesn't mean it's good. If I had a dollar for every time I'd said that. Two people in here every night, you'd think it would be bigger. Yesterday we were talking about the Cinderella story, the movie.

Yes. And there was a big earthquake at the start. Yeah. So when I was little, my mum and my grandma and I, we went to the USA and we were in an earthquake when we were in Los Angeles. Oh, my God. So I was in like, we were on like the 10th floor of a hotel and mum and grandma still tell us stories of like how it felt like.

How scary. How scary. And this is my recollection of that night and also things you can say in the bed and in the bed. I know there was some rumbling last night, but I slept right through it. Rick to scale, what? Dick to scale.

But they actually were like, it was the craziest thing ever. And I was like, why didn't I wake up? And they're like, oh, you were just asleep. Oh, my God. Oh, you actually did sleep through it. Oh. So I don't didn't I wake up? And they're like, oh, you were just asleep. Oh, my God. Oh, you actually did sleep through it. Oh. So I don't have any memory of it. And they're like, well, of course you don't.

You were asleep the whole time. Oh, my God. Yeah. And they're like running around, like holding the door closed and shit and freaking out. And I was just like. How scary. This is for when you're buying a bed. Oh, I'm currently, you know, on a single.

So do you have a king available? Or a queen? I've been on a single for a while. King, queen? Super king? If you've got one. A firm king. I'd love a firm king

to wake up to in the morning. Let me put this pillow underneath you in the right spot. You'd be surprised at the difference it makes. So I've read online. I've heard that. You've heard that. Have you implemented it? Don't answer that.

Oh, look. Oh, sorry. Oh, sorry. Do you want me to come first? I'm not allowed to drink coffee in here, am I? Oh, look, Judge Wendell. Who says three's a crowd? Come on in.

This is for when you're putting on a pillowcase, but it might be the wrong size pillow. Okay, yep. Oh, that's a big one. You're just going to have to, like, shove it in. And sometimes you have to fist it right down. Just get some purchase. And sometimes you have to fist it right down.

Just get some purchase. This is when you're turning your pillow over to the cold side. Oh, the best feeling. Yeah. Sometimes I like to just flip it over and give a little smack. Who's your daddy? So every night I will fluff Bridget's pillow. That's nice.

So I kind of like, because you know how it's like over time. Yeah. Because it's a soft, fluffy one. Yeah. So I kind of. That's nice. And then I always do a joke about like doing a little salt bath thing when I'm finished. That's funny.

Yeah, it's very funny. That is very sweet. Yeah. Yeah. Torb's, Sean calls my blankets every night. That's cute. Yeah. How good are having nice partners? Oh, I love it.

The things they do for us and the very little we do in return is staggering. We can't even hold a bargain ticket. I'm thinking of popping some plants in here. What do you reckon this space would look like with a massive trunk in it? It'd be pretty good next to that bush. Yeah, because it's pretty girthy. So I just need a, you know, feng shui, as you mentioned. So you wanted to do some decorating?

Yeah, decorating. Decorating. Oh, the carpet matches the drapes. Yeah, silky smooth. I'm actually pretty tired, so... All right, turn over. You just lay there. We'll do the lazy one.

Oh, what's that? Oh, BJ. BJ. For those playing along at home... Your dog's name is BJ. For those playing along at home. Your dog's name is BJ. And he sleeps with me in the bed. Yeah. Oh, so you let your dog in here.

That's our style. Dog is style. It's nice, isn't it? It is. Yeah. Oh, there is just so much natural light in here do you want to fuck hi it's megan from elvin and you're listening to tony and ryan as women our life stages come with unique risk factors like when our estrogen levels drop during menopause, causing the risk of heart disease to go up.

Know your risks. Visit heartandstroke.ca. A massive shout-out to a few of our champion tapas over at our Patreon. Maddie, Danielle George, thank you so much. Nicholas Telles España, Eric Espinoza, Kate Engelks, Alison Hoff, Phoebe Lim. Oh, I hope that her arms are okay. She lost her limb. Phoebe Lim. Sorry. Ellen Marie Hughes.

James O'Smelly. Bucky Bayless. And Harleen Corr. Thank you very much. We fucking love to see it. Now, our exclusive tarpers and our champion tarpers, each week they get a YouTube, a private YouTube video. Yes.

That's been going out. People have been liking that. And they also get the blog from the desk of Dr. Tony Lodge. And I don't want to oversell it and under deliver. You know what I mean? Yeah. You don't want to hype it up and have people let down.

And then people go, oh. But I will say that last week, Tony wrote about a sandwich. But it was like, yum as. Yeah. Don't overse't know i want to don't oversell it i would never it was about a sandwich i'd never make fun of art that you created i'm not no i'm i'm under promising so when they get there they'll be like but it was about a sandwich yeah you just sound like you're being like a bit of a Carla Conti about the fact that I wrote about a sandwich. No, I'm trying to be like, that wasn't what I was, I wasn't trying to be a Carla Conti.

And I'm now very self-conscious that I'm sounding like a Carla Conti. Oh, just so no one gets too excited, she wrote about a sandwich. That's what that was then that you just did. Okay, if I did the opposite, that would set you up for failure if I went, a literary scholar has stumbled into the Tony and Ryan office and delivered a – You're still being a Carla Comte, aren't you? The greatest blog of all time. Just last week you were showing me a blog that you really enjoy,

Seth Godin's blog, and that sometimes they're just five lines long. And I was like, you know what? Like sometimes less is more. And I just wanted to share something that I really enjoyed. And then everybody shared their favourite sandwiches back. I thought that would be really nice. Why do I feel like everything I say I sound like a colour conch? I look forward to going and reading the comments

and choosing one of said sandwiches and making it for myself this afternoon. Do you? I do. Great. That sounds good. I'm looking to try new foods. Yeah. Well, sandwiches, I don't know.

You would consider that a new food. Oh, like a new combination. Sure. Yeah. The one that I made was pretty good. It was really good. I was making it while we were on the phone together, actually. We were on the phone and I was, like, in the kitchen, like, making my sandwich. Yeah. The one that I made was pretty good. It was really good. I was making it while we were on the phone together, actually. We were on the phone and I was like in the kitchen making my sandwich.

Really? Yeah. I was just on my AirPods. When we speak to each other, you have my undivided attention. Well, I'm just writing about sandwiches, mate. It doesn't really take up that much RAM. Are we fighting? I hope not.

I'm just upset about this thing because I have sustained an injury. How are you? I've sustained an injury. You've sustained an injury. You've had a few injuries. I have. My ankle is still fucked from falling off my scooter last week. I was sick last week.

We're just a couple of wounded soldiers. We are, actually. Luckily, we've got a bit of a holiday coming up. We do. Tony and I have booked ourselves in for a break. Yeah, we're having a little holiday. Yeah. But podcasts will remain as per usual.

So no one's stressed. Don't worry. By break, I mean we've got a weekend away without each other. Yeah. Anyway, so. We're just like, don't stress. We're not stressed. No.

No, because like everybody last week when you were away was like, when's Ryan coming back? Because I was here by myself, which made me feel awesome. Thanks for that, everyone. Anyway, I have sustained an injury from something that is supposed to love me because I love it. We very recently, my partner and I got a dog. I didn't think this was going to be dog related.

Yeah. Pippa, she's fucking gorgeous she's a nine month old frenchie um and pretty much as soon as we got her we had to get her spayed like fixed and um so like it's like proper abdominal surgery like they open her up and like have to go in there and stuff so it's like pretty full on and so after she was in surgery she has like a cone on and everything but she had to be put in a playpen like so she had her own space so she was basically like on bed rest for a few days so she didn't have as much room to like run around and stuff because she needs to heal so she's still got her cone on she's still healing but um she's allowed we went to the vet and they're like oh

she's allowed out of her crate now um and she's allowed to like run around the house again. They were like, the only thing is she's not allowed to jump. Okay. She's all stitched up. She doesn't want to like pop a stitch. Exactly. So she's not allowed to like walk upstairs or downstairs. She's not allowed to like jump onto, into our arms or anything.

We have to pick her up a different way if we're picking her up our arms or anything we have to pick her up a different way if we're picking her up it's really uncomfortable trying to pick her up yeah because you have to kind of like scoop her up from under her bum and her like front legs um and we're not allowed to like walk her very much outside um because obviously if she gets excited and runs around and stuff it could hurt her she's also also not allowed, and they said this specifically, she's not allowed to jump on the couch. Yep. And what did you teach her on the first day that you got her?

To jump on the couch. Because Torbs and I are like, oh, people are like, come and sit with us on the couch. You introduced her to the forbidden fruits. We did. So she was only with us for like three days. She's jumping on the couch, living a life of luxury. And then the vet is like, cool, the one thing she can't do is jump on the couch for two weeks.

And we're like, fucking hell. And we were like, oh, she loves sitting up there with us. What could we do? And they go, you know how you can buy pet ramps? We suggest getting one of those. And because she's a little dog, she should probably use a ramp all the time because it's not good for her joints to be jumping all that way up.

And we're like, oh, okay, that's good. Anyway, so basically I took her home and they're like, oh, she doesn't have to be in her playpen anymore, but make sure you get a ramp straight away. You asked me for a ramp? I asked if you had one because I was like, fuck, I'm seeing you anyway, maybe you've got something. They suggest a ramp.

I go, do you sell them here? They go, no. No. Of course. I call every pet shop like in the area no no ramps i call like the reject shop they go oh it's like listed on the website but i couldn't order it online so i was and i needed it like that day i'm calling i called probably 10 different reject shops none of them had what they had said that they had in stock online. Are you about to tell everyone that you have crafted a ramp?

Fucking. Fucking how? So online, heaps of stores said that they had them, but they just like then didn't have them when I actually called them to be like, can you just put one aside and I'll come. I'll drive there right now and get it. I will like pay for it over the phone if you need the insurance that I'm going to come or whatever.

Like, no, we actually just don't have it. I found on Kmart's website they had a pet ramp but like for the car. So it's like plastic, not carpet. So it's not really what we needed. But it's better than nothing. But we were like that will probably get us through until one we order online comes. Yep. Because all the ones, they're actually quite chic.

Really? So it's like a gorgeous pine wood easel kind of thing. Are they like stairs or just like a straight ramp? It's a ramp. So it's like a carpeted ramp so that she can trot up there and she won't sleep or anything. Yeah. But so she doesn't have to jump. Of course. Anyway, so they've got like trot up there and she won't sleep or anything but so she doesn't have to jump. Of course.

Anyway, so they've got one that came up. This is like the last ditch attempt but it's for the car. So it's like really heavy-duty plastic so not ideal and it's also huge because it's like made for getting like big dogs into the back of like a Land Cruiser. Right. Yeah. Yeah, so it's like really fucking long and fucking heavy duty plastic.

Anyway. And your couch isn't that high. No, it's not. But we also don't have a, our house isn't that big. Yeah, you don't have room for a Land Cruiser ramp. Exactly. It's like fucking two meters long, this ramp. So we're like, oh, we're going to have to, you know,

put it up for her to get up, then move it out of the way so that she doesn't trip on it. You know, like it's this whole fucking thing. And I just thought it would be so simple. And the vet's like, oh, we're going to have to put it up for her to get up, then move it out of the way so that she doesn't trip on it. It's this whole fucking thing, and I just thought it would be so simple. And the vet's like, oh, just get a ramp. I'm like, cool, how hard could that be? So Torbs goes to, and I stayed at home with Pip. Torbs goes to Kmart, and he calls me.

Classic fucking Torbs calling me at the shops. What are we on again? A stamp? No, a ramp. A jet plamp? I'm like, pet ramp. How hard is it? A tramp?

We'd be bouncing all over the place. Anyway, so he goes to Kmart. They don't have the car ramp at all, even though it says that it's in fucking stock. Is there a ramp in this town? What's the fucking point in having that, like, find in store thing if it's fucking inaccurate? Yeah, they need to lift. And I'm like, can you ask someone if they've got it? They might have one out the back that they haven't like put

out on the floor yet or something. Torbs is like, oh, yeah, I'll ask him. Anyway, while he's asking them, I'm at home Googling and I'm like, fuck, is there anything else? I'm like, maybe there's like a kid's slide or something that we could, you know, try and figure out. Yeah, make do, yeah. Anyway, online I find this like kids climbing wall

and it's like pine wood and it's flat and it's got like rungs on it for like kids to, it's like rock climbing but it's like small, it's like only this big and it's got like little wooden rungs so that they can climb up and then whatever. I don't fucking know what kids do. I don't get it. You're not in the kids' rock climbing area. No, I'm not.

That's not your niche. I cover a lot of areas, but that's not one of them. And I said to Torbs, oh, do you reckon that that would work? And he finds it and he goes, oh, like it's better than anything else that they've got. We'll grab it. And he gets that. And then I'm like, maybe buy some of those anti-slip mats,

you know, that you can put inside of like storage or whatever. And he goes, oh, no luck on those, but I found some hessian. And I was like, all right. He sends me a message. He goes, fire up the hot glue gun, sweetie. We're crafting. And it's about 8 or 9 p.m. We haven't had dinner yet because we're, like,

fucking trying to put this thing together. Also, just the line, fire up the hot glue gun, does that do it for you? Oh, yeah. I was ready. So he got home. The hot glue gun's hot. It's on the table.

I'm, like, ready to go. I've got my craft scissors out. We're, like, fucking ready to go. Pippa's, like, about to watch, you know, geniuses at work. Yeah. And anyway, so he comes home home and the other side of the ramp ended up having like a lip on either side and nothing on the back. So it was perfect.

Perfect. So I'm like hot glue gunning this Hessian to the back of this fucking kid's toy so that it had a bit of like grab so that she wouldn't slip and slide or whatever. And we haven't had dinner. We're like cutting up this Hessian. We're trying to make it work. We're hot glue gunning.

Anyway, right at the end, Pip is so happy and it's all working. I'll show you a photo of what we ended up making. So there's Pip and she's got her cone on, poor little doll. Jeez, it takes up half the. Yeah, so it's really big because otherwise it would be really steep. When I was picturing it in my mind, it was steep, and I was like that looks like hard work. Yeah, steep, and I was like, that looks like hard work. Yeah, no.

So it's like the length of like our chaise lounge or whatever. And it's – anyway, so it looks pretty dicey. We've ordered a proper one. This is just an interim ramp for anybody that's like, oh, that's not good. Like it's just an interim ramp. But anyway, we get it working. She's happy as.

She's like, thanks, Mum, for making me this ramp. Like I'm so excited. And she's happy and I'm just fucking proud as punch. Like, a real proud mum moment for me. How often is she using the ramp? Every time she gets onto the couch. And so she'd jump on and off the couch probably like 12 times a day. Yeah.

She'd get up there, sleep for an hour and then hop back down, see what Torbs is doing, whatever. And anyway, I'm just like, fuck, what a proud mum moment for me. I'm proud of you. I'm a new mum. I've crafted this. It was like a late night craft project. It was due the next day and we had to stay up late and craft this thing.

Anyway, and I go, you know what? All in a day's work of being a mum and put my hand on my hip and like hand on the table like in a sassy way. And I put my hand straight onto the hot glue gun. Oh, fuck. And, like, burnt up all my finger. You can see the little, like, blister on my finger. Bubbling.

Yeah, it's bubbled up. And that's what you get for being a smartass. And did it make you feel ten times worse that you were being a dick when you did it? Yeah, because I was, like, totally sleeping. I'm like, oh, all I know is work. All I know is work. You know, being? Yeah, because I was like, I'm going to do this work. Oh, no, it's work. You know, being a mum, it's like thirsty work.

And I set myself on fire. But Pippa's like, oh, look at this ram. She's like trotting up and down. Because if you hurt yourself doing it, you'd be like, I fucking pushed through the pain for the dog. It's a war wound. It's a war wound. And everyone's like, hey, you still got a gun though.

Respect. Yeah. But mine was like being a smart ass at the end. Being a poser. I'm like, oh, how hard's being a mum? Like it was just like. Did you scream? I was just like, fuck.

And Tom's like, you okay? And I like sprinted over to the tap. And because like the hot glue gun was like covered in glue. Yeah. And so my hand was covered in glue. And so I needed to peel the glue off like my burning skin. And I was like, I don't know if this is glue or my skin. You're just peeling skin off at this stage.

Yeah. So it was just like, it was actually like, it's fine, but it was real gnarly. And it was just like, oh, my God, it's so late. We haven't eaten dinner. Like people's got to ramp though and I'm fucking, you know, need to go to the ER. Does any time, not that she does because she's super chill, if she gives you a bit of grief or gives you a look,

do you give her a bit of like, I've burnt my fucking hand for you? Yeah. I gave up my body for you. Yeah. Yeah. I put my body on the line for your ramp. I felt a burning sensation for you and you will respect me. But I did feel like super mum, I'll be honest.

Yep. Putting the ramp together. Yeah, and Torbs and I, we're like working away. I'm surprised because you do love a craft that you haven't like bejazzled it or fucking added a bit of. No, that's not me. Oh. I'm a plain, I like plain, simple things.

But isn't crafting about like colour and expression and creativity? Because it depends on what kind of craft. You're a minimalist. Don't put us all in the same box, mate. Oh, I wouldn't. Don't tar us all with the same hot blue gun. Things you love to see. What have you got, Tony Lodge?

I have a really cool story from Kendra in our Facebook group. She also messaged us on Patreon, so I've spoken to her privately. Is she in WA? I'm actually not sure where she is. Kendra Latrobe? No, Kendra Lancaster. Oh. And she shared that she got a Tony and Ryan tattoo.

What? Yeah. So she said, I'm just the butter to your bread, mate. And this is the tattoo. It's on her leg. And it's a big piece of bread with like a bit of butter melting on the middle. So for anybody that maybe hasn't listened to the podcast before, Ryan, once about a year ago, someone responded to one of our videos and said, God, he's really just the butter to her bread. And it's kind of stuck, hasn't it? As like one just the butter to her bread. Is that offensive? Should I be offended by that?

It's kind of stuck, hasn't it, as like one of the things that we say. Yep. So this is why the bread and butter thing makes sense. But Kendra said that in December 2021, she actually lost her mum to COVID. So she's dealing with like losing her mum, which is awful. I've obviously been through that. I know how that feels. I can certainly empathise.

And she found Tony and Ryan shortly after and started from the beginning and listened all the way through and was really loving the pod. And she said that she felt really seen because, obviously, like, you're adopted, Ryan. What? But, like, so you have a different family story. I've lost my mum. But she said she felt really seen that we both, like, so you have a different family story. I've lost my mum, but she said she felt really seen

that we both, like, grew up in different kind of ways and that we were successful, healthy, amazing people living without our biological mums. And she said that it made her feel really special that, like, she could get past what she's going through and how she's feeling. Hang on, how did she describe us? Let's break this down.

Yeah, she said successful, healthy. through and how she's feeling. Hang on, how did she describe us? Let's break this down. Yeah. She said successful, healthy. When you say successful, go and tell a bank you've got a podcast and would like a loan. Yeah. Then you'll find out just how successful or not you are. Successful, healthy. I don't know if you've heard, but Tony is a victim of a burns crime. Yeah.

I could go at any minute. Yeah. I'm hanging could go at any minute. Yeah. We're both... I'm hanging on by a thread. I was hanging on by a thread for my life last week. Yeah, you weren't. But healthy and successful. Healthy, successful and amazing.

One out of three are bad. Yeah, not too bad. But Kendra, thank you for sharing that with us. And honestly, the tattoo is amazing. I love to see that. I love to see that. Thanks for listening. Thanks for being here. So my love to see it is Tony Lodge.

Why are you rolling your eyes? Just interested to see where this is going. First of all, your hair looks great. Thank you. Second of all, when I was sick last week, not only did I miss a few episodes, I missed an event, an important event with some important people. You did.

And apparently, word on the grapevine, because I obviously wasn't there, but this is what I'm hearing. Yeah. Someone goes, Ryan's slacking off, is he? And you went, no, he's fucking not. He never slacks off. He's actually sick. And he doesn And you went, no, he's fucking not. He never slacks off. He's actually sick. And he doesn't just call in sick if he's not sick.

He works fucking hard. So I know you're kind of joking, but go fuck yourself. It really got my back up. Yeah. Because it's not like I know that they were just like, oh, having a yarn. But I was like, nah, like he doesn't deserve that. You can't bitch about someone when they're not in the room. Yeah, do it in front of my face, dog.

Yeah. Like say it to you. Yeah. Like next time be like, oh, were you actually sick? And you're like, oh, mate, I wish I was lying. Yeah. Or something. Yeah.

You know? Yeah. No, of course I... And I love to see that you got my back. Of course. Obviously, if it was around the other way, I would just fucking rinse you. But I'm glad to know. Great.

I wouldn't stand up to the big people. I'd just be like, oh, yeah. Nah, you know I've got your back. Well, some of the other people that were going to the event were like, oh, you're nervous seeing the people because they're like kind of big bosses that were going to be there. And they go, oh, you're nervous to see them? And I was like, no, they work for me.

He's fucking right, bro. I feel like, was something in the water? I don't know. A little sassy Tony was coming out. I'm fucking fired up. Yeah, yeah. No, but I do love to see it. And obviously I was joking.

I always stick up for you. But the fact that you backed me in and were like, don't even fucking say that jokingly. And like, you know how when you work in a really shitty job and like someone calls in sick and they're like, probably not. I think that that is just the worst thing you can ever say about somebody. That is what causes mental health problems. That's why people leave workplaces. Because people go, oh, you know, I really just need a day. And then people go, probably not even that sick.

That is what stops people from calling in sick. And that's why we have COVID. It actually fucking is though. The stigma of like, you got to be tough and turn up. Yeah, is fucked. And then you don't go to work and you're just riddled with guilt all day. Yep. And you're like, fuck, I'm so filled with guilt because you're judging me.

I'd rather just go on to work sick. And you feel like you have to really justify your illness. And like, yeah, and when you were like, I'm sick, I wasn't like, well, how sick? I was like, cool, go back to bed. I'll figure it out. Like, don't worry about it. You know? And I know that you would do the same if that was the situation that I was in.

I was like, bro, I can't come in today. But yeah, I just would love to say, don't fucking say that to people. Because it fucking causes like mental issues. Because it makes you feel shit when people do that. Fuck, I'm so revved up right now. Oh, me too. I could give a TED Talk. What?

Just like, I feel like you're in rally mode. Okay. You need to take this speech to the steps of Give a TED Talk. What? Just like, I feel like you're in rally mode. Okay. You need to take this speech to the steps of parliament. I could. Yeah. Or maybe to. Just you and a megaphone. Don't come in sick.

Yeah. Or to our old workplace. Stop judging people. Like march around our old workplace, be like, you don't have to be dying to take a day off. You do actually. Are we far enough from our old workplace that we can talk about them now? Can I talk about my foot? Yeah, you can talk about your foot.

Actually, this was on the podcast. I think we did talk about it, yeah. I stepped in glass. Which is so fucked. It's dumb, but it happened and it was painful. And then a few weeks later, it was still hurting. And it was giving you fucking grief. It's not as if you were like, oh, I think it's sore.

Yeah, I was limping around and feeling like like an idiot and so i went back to the hospital and they're like i think there's still a shard of glass it's deep in your foot and it's so deep you actually need to have surgery to have it taken out yep and i was like sort of limp like not limping but like wouldn't put weight on it because it fucking hurt and i said to work oh i need a day off to get this surgery yeah and because COVID, actually it might have been two days because you need to get a rat test and then wait 24 hours. Yeah. It was a whole thing.

But I was like, can I have two days off? There's glass in my foot. And they're like, nah. And it's still in there. Yeah. And then like, they're like, no, you can't. And I just went, okay. They're like, well, you're walking around now.

How bad could it be? Yeah. And then it sort of stopped hurting. And I just didn't worry about it. Like probably three weeks later it stopped hurting. And I went to the doctor and they're like, oh, the body is like pretty incredible. Sometimes it can just expel, like it just tries to push it out. Yeah.

Or it just like. Will work around it. Work around it. And so it would have created like a casing for it. Because it's gone. Oh, it's been in here for five weeks now. It obviously lives here. Yeah.

We need to figure something out. Yeah. We'll make it a little house. We'll's been in here for five weeks now. It obviously lives here. Yeah, we need to figure something out. Yeah. We'll make it a little house. We'll get it a ramp. Get it a ramp. I could help with that. If I had have known at the time. Yeah.

You were so handy. And it's probably still there. It's definitely still in there. Yeah. It lasted longer than I did at that workplace. You're not going to take time off for surgery are you well I can't no well no you won't be

and I've used my two days for the decade you've used your get out of jail free I'm very supportive of you for that for that one time don't take the piss mate I've used my sick day quota and my bless you quota until 2030 and until then it'll be good.

But thanks so much for listening. And we'll chat to you tomorrow. All is well. We're safe and happy and healthy. And thank you for taking care of me. Love you, mate. Love you, mate. Love you, bye.