Toni and Ryan - Call Me On My Car Phone

Episode Date: November 1, 2022

Things take a bit of a strange turn today in terms of phones and fashion. Sorry. Hehe love you!! Toni xoxoxox Check out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to the podcast. This is Cheyenne, who is in Denver. Ooh. Hello? Hi, Cheyenne? Yes? Hi, it's Tony and Ryan. How are you?

I'm good. How are you? Ryan's here as well. Say hello, Ryan. Hello. Is it true that Denver is a mile above sea level? It is true, yes. And everybody else here is high as well.

What does that mean? Yes, we're very popular for the weed and being above sea level. Oh. Yeah, because there's less oxygen, so you're always a bit like, but also if anyone's done the hippity-dippity in Denver, technically you're in the mile high club, if you know what I'm saying. Exactly. We're already a bit like, but also if anyone's done the hippity-dippity in Denver, technically you're in the Mile High Club, if you know what I'm saying. Exactly.

We're already a part of the club. Built in. Ready to roll. Cheyenne, as well as getting high and doing the hippity-dippity, would you also like to approve the podcast? I would love to, but I would like to say something on the record. Oh. I did not know about the Architectural Digest.

I was in Tony's corner all the way up until the end, rooting her on, and was very heartbroken that it was fake. Thank you, Cheyenne, for sharing in my heartbreak, because I was upset too. And Ryan goes, oh, you should have just known. I didn't say that. I didn't say you should have. I just thought you would have. Yep, and I was obviously very. And Ryan goes, oh, you should have just known. I didn't say that. I didn't say you should have. I just thought you would have.

Yep, and I was obviously very upset. He assumed. I didn't even assume. He told me. He said this is what was happening. Cheyenne, can I just say that I'm not here to defend myself in that I agree. I felt awful as well.

I just assumed, like an idiot, that Tony would just laugh and go, you guys are idiots. And then when you believed it, I felt awful as well. I just assumed, like an idiot, that Tony would just laugh and go, you guys are idiots. And then when you believed it, I felt awful. And it turns out all the tapas believed it as well. So, I mean, thanks for bringing up – it was the elephant in the room from this week. Yeah, you're welcome, of course. You're welcome.

Will you approve anyway, though? Yes, of course I will. Yay! Just as a side note real quick as well, would you like to see like a Tony Courtyard walkthrough? Yes, of course I will. Just as a side note real quick as well, would you like to see like a Tony Courtyard walkthrough? We are not doing that. There's nothing in there. You've changed your tune since Tuesday.

Would you like to see that, Cheyenne? No, I'm not going to do it now. Cheyenne, would you like to see that? I mean, Tony's got to be consenting. She's got to be consenting. Yeah, you're fucking right again. You're right again. Hey, it's Cheyenne from Denver, Colorado,

and I approve write again. You write again. Hey, it's Cheyenne from Denver, Colorado, and I approve this podcast. All right, coming up today. Hello. A brand new fashion trend. Oh, mate, this is coming up today. Hello. A brand new fashion trend. Oh, mate, this is coming from you. I've seen the sweaters you wear. I don't know if I want to talk to you about fashion. It's not from me, but you do have a point that like.

Maybe you're not the best judge. Am I the one to bring it up? Am I the one to call it out? Yeah. So you're wearing what you're wearing and you're going, oh, I don't know about that. You're complaining about someone's fashion in those shoes? Yeah. Interesting choice.

About fair. My shoes are actually really dirty this morning because when I was riding my scooter, it's like a bit wet outside. And so when I was riding my scooter, all the mud flicked up. Don't fucking hate that. I don't hate that because I don't have a scooter because mine was stolen. And I don't have a car. Yeah. When you're wrong, I don't have a car. Yeah.

When you roll your eyes, I don't have a car. Yeah, mate, we know. Everyone knows. Did you see in the Turning Around Facebook group, anyone's free to join, someone was taking the piss out of you for always saying you don't have a car? No. There's this meme.

Why is that something you take? Because you just say it all the time. Like we get it, you don't have a car. Since when was it cool to bully poor people? I don't know, but from my Audi, I feel like I just can't hear anything. Even though the acoustics are phenomenal. The thing I hate about you saying that is that the acoustics are actually phenomenal. They are.

When I take a call in my car, I actually don't take calls at home anymore. I jump in the car and- Hello, this is the operator. I'll just put you through to the Audi. Yeah. Remember car phones? I was literally about to say, I always wanted mum and dad to get one so bad. They're like, Tony, they're like millions of dollars.

But you'd pick them up and they'd- But you'd have your own number. So imagine just calling someone and I call your home phone and you don't answer. And I go, maybe I'll try the car. What is that? Maybe I'll try the car. That is like the best version of like, oh, I'm just going through a tunnel, like I can't hear you because you've called them on the car phone.

Well, of course I have. Are you on the road? You've called the car. You've called the car. It's like back in the day being like, hey, you at work? Like, yeah, you fucking called coles yeah you called coles and asked for the deli like you know that i'm at work you know i'm forgetting sarah marshall like jonah hill's character is like working in the restaurant

he's like i'd love to sell you some weed right now jeremy but i can't because i'm at my fucking job because you called me at work he Is that on the restaurant fund? So the most dumb thing about the car phone, and I've thought a lot about this because mum had a car phone at one stage. Did she? I think when she – What an effluent little bee. The first 90% of her career she was a school teacher and then she got moved up to be like a principal.

Oh, the vice principal and then principal, whatever. But I think there's a thing that like you have to be, you're kind of on call at all times. Right. Like if there's a fire at the school on the weekend or, so they're kind of like, and this is like just. So I'm not laughing because that is obviously very serious, but like she's not like a fucking vigilante.

Yeah, I know. Like it just sounds a bit like over the top to be like, oh, she needed a car phone because, you know, what if someone's pencil broke and they needed a sharpener? Like what if someone's pencil. No, but sometimes there's maybe a death in the family or a student's being, like there's some stuff that the principal has to deal with at all hours.

Yeah, but, yeah, okay. It's not like come and fight the fire. It's like I don't want you to rock up to work the next morning not knowing. Well, so did all the teachers have to have a car phone so that they wouldn't rock up not knowing? Which was the principal. And then she could contact the teachers. But, like, what if they didn't have a car phone?

What if she called the landline and Mrs Smith wasn't at home? Yeah, you know what? You're right. We bag out the car phone. Why doesn't everyone have a car phone? Everyone would have. Like if one person needed it, surely that equates to everyone needing a car phone.

Do you know what I mean? I do. I actually do. I'm not trying to be an arsehole about your mum. It sounds like you are. Because she's a lovely woman and I adore her and she me. But I'm just saying that seems like, you know, she's not the fucking president.

Well, she is of a school. She's the president of the PNC, like the parent-teacher fucking. One day, I don't know how or why, but something's going to happen and you're going to go, fuck, I wish I had a car phone. I really need it. I'm actually not being funny. My car has a SIM card in it. You're a fucking idiot.

Fuck off. Delete this whole episode. Take back everything you said. Yeah. But I don't know. I don't think you can call. Like, obviously, you can call, like, through CarPlay. Who has a SIM card?

Because it's online. Yeah. The sat nav and shit. Yeah. So that you could, I can, like. What's your phone's number? Your car's number. What's your phone's number?

It's the same as my mobile. It's got a four at the end. Okay, cool. Yeah. 1-800-TONY-CAR. So I remember when mum got the car phone put in. I was real little. And it was like, fuck.

Oh, that would have been sick. Yeah. Like, you know when you were talking about when your mum got the BMW? Oh, yeah. My mum still had the shit car, but when the phone was in it, it was pretty much like, are'm like, are you Batman? Like, is this the Batman build? No, that is cool.

That's cool. And then to the guy who installs it, because this is the dumbest thing. You know how you can, like, pick it up? Yeah. Like, it's a physical phone. It's like a handset, yeah. Yeah, so he goes, so this is how you pick it up, and then you clip it back into here when you're done.

But if you're driving at the time and don't want to pick it up, there's this button that's, like, hands-free. And I, at age eight, go, so if you're not driving the car, why would you be in it? Yeah. You know? But back then there wouldn't have been phone laws. There weren't.

So you would have been able to just pick up the car phone and go, yeah, hello, Mandy speaking. It must have just been the way you said it. What's wrong with the principal's car? As if like every now and then you might be in the car driving it. So if that is the case, then you push this other button. I was like, wouldn't driving the car be the default? Yeah, be the automatic setting.

The car phone rings. I can't imagine what that sounds like. You're listening to Kiss 101.1 and ring, ring. And you're like, hello, Tony's car. And then you're like, oh, hang on. Yeah, I'll put him on. Ryan, it's for you. And just hand the thing over to me in the passenger seat.

Oh, hey. Do you know why I just had this weird vision, right? Because you remember back in the day. Fuck. Like your phone was like plugged in at the wall. Yeah. It's like a magic card phone. You can only go 10 metres away from the house.

It's going to be plugged in. So you're driving around, it's like a wire sticking out that goes into your kitchen because it's like... Or you pull up at the service station and go, do you mind if I plug in my wire? I've got to call the school. There's been a fire at the school. Ever since she goes, do you mind if I plug in my wire?

I've got a call from school. There's been a fire at school. Do you ever remember when your home phone was plugged in, as you were saying, but it was like a boy or like a private call and you had to like stretch the cord around the corner back under the door frame? Back out of the kitchen kind of thing, yeah. I begged for a cordless phone. Was that real lux when it came in?

Oh, yeah. We never had one until I was like 15 or 16. So you're like, I could take this into my room and really have a good chat. But, I mean, by then you had mobiles and stuff so you could text or like MSN. Free calls after 8 p.m. Oh, yeah. My sister actually, like so she worked as like a babysitter. She worked at Kmart and all this stuff. She paid

to get a separate phone line put into her room so that she could talk on the phone. And I'm only just now clicking that. Obviously she was like talking to boys. Yeah. Yeah. But so she got her own phone. Her own phone line. Yeah, she paid to

get it put in and she had like one of those cordless white Uniden phones with the big antenna. Do you remember those? Like the classic like white hands, not hands-free, what was it? Cordless. Yeah. Like the classic white cordless phone.

Would you even call a phone now cordless? No. Because cordless is the default. You would just say phone and everyone assumes you mean iPhone. Yeah, and then if you had, like, it would be a cord phone. Yeah, yeah. Because the default is no cord. What a strange time we live in.

What a strange time we live in. Have we started the pod yet? But how is the phone car phone? And there's a car with a phone in it. What's the car doing there? Let's just do one quick audio, Quayne, and we'll keep moving. Because I want to talk about this French man. Yep.

So this French man has his first ever date with an American woman. Yep. And he's not impressed. Oh. This TikTok has gone mental. You've probably already seen it. But let's, for people like Tony that haven't, have a listen to this guy describing his first ever date.

It was a disaster. It was an absolute disaster. An absolute disaster. I arrived at the restaurant. First of all, her name is Kimberly. Oh, Kimberly. It's not my favorite name, her name is Kimberly. Oh, Kimberly. It's not my favorite name, but it's fine, it's fine. You know, she's pretty, you know?

So we sit down, we take the menu, and she looks me in the eyes, and she tells me she doesn't eat gluten. But how can you not eat gluten? Gluten is my life. Kimberly, gluten is croissant. Gluten is baguette. How can you not eat gluten?

So I'm starting to be confused. I'm not going to lie. I look left, I look right. I'm a bit confused in this restaurant. And then I'm like, okay, I'm going to have some glass of wine, you know, like chill a little bit, you know. And so I was like, what do you want to drink? And she says to me, she doesn't drink alcohol. I could chill a little bit, you know, and so I was like, what do you want to drink?

And she says to me, she doesn't drink alcohol. Oh, how can you not drink alcohol in your life, Kimberly? Alcohol is joy. So I'm sorry. I'm sorry if I left. I left the restaurant without saying goodbye. I couldn't stay there. I'm sorry, but I can't have a love relationship with someone who doesn't eat gluten and doesn't drink wine. I'm sorry, Kimberley.

That has to be fake. It's done like a billion views. When I was on the TV yesterday, they were asking about one of the topics. That has to be fake. Well, this French man claims he walked out on a date because the American woman didn't love two things that he loved. What an asshole. Yeah. And the way that he's like, like, I just think he, what a mean guy.

That's not nice, eh? No, but I do think. I get the culture shock part of it, I guess. Okay, so. But. I get the culture shock part of it, I guess. Okay. So every Saturday morning I wake up to a, like, tap on the back from Bridget and she goes, croissant?

And my job on the weekend is to get croissants and coffee. Yeah. And if I just rolled over and was like, oh, actually, I don't participate in gluten activities. Yeah. She'd be like, tell it walking, sweetheart. She would choose gluten over me. Yeah, I would choose gluten over everyone in my life, to be honest.

So I understand that. Obviously, we might not be as brazen as the French man, but like. It just seems to be mean that he walked out on her and then I don't think that happened. Kimball-o. If there's one person who can relate to this, it's this suburban dad from outer suburban Perth. Fuck.

So back in the day before he married fucking Sharon and had seven kids and got a jet ski. Yeah. He also worked on it, walked out on a date because some Sheila in Perth didn't love two things that he loved. Oh, yep. And this is him explaining that. Do I know the two things?

Okay. Have I ever told you about that Sheila I went on a date with a few years ago? Oh, mate, you wouldn't fucking believe it. Took her to the fanciest joint in town. What was it? Hogsbreath. Hogsbreath. Hogsbreath, get that.

Yeah. Yeah, I love a bit of Hogsbreath. Those are curly fries. Hogs breath, can I? Yeah. Yeah, I love a bit of hogs breath. Those are curly fries. Yeah, they do a little bit for me. Well, anyway, we sit down and I go, well, obviously I'll have a steak right at the hogs breath. Yeah. You know. Did you surf and turf?

Put a prawn on that steak? I would have loved to, mate. But here's why. I said, you know what? Dollface and I will both have a surf and turf. And she goes, oh, I actually can't have a steak because I'm a vegan. She doesn't reef in beef. Doesn't reef in beef.

Can you believe that, mate? I cannot believe that. And I go, fuck me. All right, well, you don't eat meat and we're at the Hogs Breath. Can you have the curly fries? Yeah. You know, mate, because bloody that'll keep everyone happy. And she goes, oh, they don't have salt on them, do they?

Because I've got high blood pressure. And I thought, mate, if you've got high blood pressure, you haven't seen me yet. If you can't deal with your heart race and then don't come back to my place in the SSU. And, mate, I tell you what, she'd never call me back. I don't doubt that because you didn't have a car phone. How could she ever make the call?

G'day, is Frank there? No, he's driving. I guess that's over. Hey, it's Cheyenne from Denver, Colorado, and you're listening to Tony and Ryan. Right. A massive shout-out to a few of our champion tapas over at our Patreon. You can check it out at any time you like in the link in our show notes. A few of the people that have recently joined,

and recently as in quite some time ago because we're trying to get through everyone. Theo Liotet, Line Handler, Samantha Jackson and off. Nice. Good work, Sammy. Very good. Laura Koch, Lily Hannon, Jay McKendry, Sophia Aurora. Oh, my God. Where's Sophia Aurora from? I'm a fucking supermodel.

That sounds very like, and now Sofia Aurora wearing the Givenchy. Oh, Tony. Oh, my God. Sorry. That was hot. I've been watching too much Kardashians. Shamil Nanhak, Nicholas Yanni, Craig Smith, and Big Twiggo. The Big Twig.

Yeah. Benjamin Twig, thank you so much for being here. Love to see it. I'm going to go out on a limb. More like on a branch. The Big Twig, thank you so much for being here. Love to see it. I'm going to go out on a limb. More like on a branch. The Big Twig. The Big Twig's one of the best things to come out of South Australia. I mean, fucking what else is there?

Fruit chocs. Farmer's Union iced milk. Yeros. Yeros is not from Adelaide. Oh, no, sorry. The calling a kebab a Yeros in Australia is from South Australia, not the Yeros itself. A kebab and a Yeros is not from Adelaide. Oh, no, sorry. The calling a kebab a Yeros in Australia is from South Australia, not the Yeros itself. A kebab and a Yeros are different.

Well, that's what a South Australian would say. No, they are. Because a kebab is like. I remember across the street those hectic dudes and we ordered a kebab and they're like, didn't you mean a fucking Slovakian? I was like, whatever, mate. Yeah, they're all different. Put some meat in a wrap, I'll eat it.

Yeah, he wasn't impressed with that. Neither are you, apparently. No one's going to be happy about that. Well, I'm trying to give the big Twiggy compliment. That hasn't worked out well, has it? You don't have to compliment people by bringing others down. I'm not. Except if you live in South Australia.

You're bringing down big heroes. No, Lara Bingle is from South Australia. Yeah. Not the actual one. Our Lara Bingle. The Lara who got into a Bingle. Yeah. Anyway, thank you so much to all those people.

So, hey, tomorrow on the show in Normal or Nah, 18% of adults do this thing when they're making out with their partner. That's fact. Okay. And it's not normal. Do you do it? No. I bet you do.

No. We'll get with that tomorrow. Is it that 18% of people finger someone on a plane while they're making out with their partner? That's obviously not correct. Because you've done that. Because what would the other 82% do on a plane? And you just said you didn't.

What would the other 82% on the plane do? Eat the food? Don't wink at me when I say that. Fucking hell. All right. Yep. Next. Who ordered the fish fingers?

You did on the plane with Lauren, that girl that you fingered on a plane. Remember when you did that? I'm going to have to call her. You fingered on a plane. You don't need to call her. We know. Proof is in the pudding. Proof is in her pudding.

I saw this. I know it's probably too late for Halloween chat, but my favorite costume was someone went as a ghost, and it was just like a white, plain white outfit, but on it it was like, oh, hey, thanks for the lovely evening. Did you want to catch up again? Hello? Question mark.

And it's like the guy just goes to the end. And that was printed on a T-shirt. That's good. I'll put that on a T-shirt. Well, they did and obviously it was hilarious as we all know now. Yeah. Speaking of fashion. Ryan's got another corker that he wants to remove.

Fucking hell. What's happened? Okay. Just the butter tea bread. The Kardashians and Skims, more specifically, Kim K's fashion brand of what's normally. It's like shapewear and underwear and loungewear. They've brought out a new dress.

And, Toni, can you describe the back of this dress? So it's like quite a slinky cut. It's quite low back, spaghetti straps, and there is a hole in the lower back so you can see kind of the welcome mat area and the butt crack, the top of the butt crack. I'd say the top inch, not just like a few mils, like a full inch and a half of butt crack. And they're calling it butt cleavage.

Kim Kardashian is introducing the world to butt cleavage. You wouldn't be able to wear any knickers. Well, a bit of the chat. Or unless you could wear a C-string. Well, C-strings are the weirdest thing. A lot of the comments, and I was reading through the comments because some of them are fucking hilarious, but some of them were genuinely like, it's a bit weird without underwear, but if you have like a sexy thong with like, oh,

like a thong with like diamonds or something, it's actually less weird and slutty than just having bare top of ass. I just don't understand when that, like I get fashion moves and changes all the time. This is obviously, I'm not the target audience for this. I think for people that have a hot-ass body and whatever. That's not the hot part of a butt though, I don't think. No, I think that the plump part of the butt is the part of the butt

that I like, no. Normally whenever like you're bending over and someone's like, oh, you can see the top of your butt crack, now we're doing it on purpose. It just seems so counterproductive, doesn't it? I was talking to my wife, Bridget, about this. And I said, oh, some people said the fancy thong at the top. And she just laughed and goes, we're not bringing back the whale tail.

I haven't heard the term whale tail for so long. So this is the first thing that I thought of when you were like, oh, my God, have you seen that dress? And I was like, yeah. So I am part of this Kath and Kim Facebook group. And so this has just gone va-va-va viral inside the Facebook group because she used to do it. So here is the classic Kimberly Craig photo of her. So she's wearing a very low back dress with the hole,

much like the new Skims dress that you would have seen online. And she is wearing a light blue G-string or thong, as they say in America, with the diamantes on it. Like that is, she literally is wearing exactly what you just said would be nice if you wore it underneath. I didn't say it'd be nice. I was just reading the comments. Oh, that was a comment.

Sorry. Take that back. I thought that you said that. No, no, no. Oh, my God. I thought you were saying, and maybe that would be nice if you wore a thong with some diamond design. No, no, no, no.

They were comments, mate. I am not trying to justify the butt cleavage. But you know what? Kim Kardashian thinks she's at the forefront of fashion. Well, she ain't. She's been beaten by, what, 20 years? Yeah, 20 years, 20 years. That's a Kath and Kim joke that hopefully people get.

So this is a random story, but go with it. Sorry, I can't start looking at the bum. Yeah. Of the Kardashian one or the Kath and Kim one? They're all Ks. Yeah, the Kim Kardashian, Kimberly Craig. Yeah. Craig with a K. So random story, but go with me here. Yeah. one or the or the kath and kim one they're all k's yeah the kim kardashian kimberly craig yeah craig with a k so random story but go with me here yeah when i was in high school altham high this guy wore a whale tail yeah every day and i have like my jeans at my knees just to make sure

everyone knew and could see it this guy um from russia eagle, moved to our school. Oh, I remember you. You've talked about Igor before. He ended up playing for Australia in the Olympics. He was a captain of the Olympic team, an unreal volleyball player, and we were like a volleyball school, which is why he came to our school. He was like 6'7", and by the time we were in year 12, he was like one of the best players in the country, right? So we go to this volleyball tournament.

It's like the high school championships, and it's not just like the – you know, it's year 7, year eight, under 16, under 18. So there's thousands and thousands of kids. And then it's fucking hilarious because you've got this 6'7 Russian, the best player in the country, playing against high schoolers. Like it's – Yeah. But he's like the right age and he's part of the school and everything.

He's so good. Not as if you were cheating. Yeah, yeah. But you can imagine if you're like a 14-year-old and you see this like Russian – and he's like a lovely guy. He's pretty funny. But he's just huge. Yeah, he's huge.

And just everyone loves him. And why wouldn't you? Because you're 14 and this guy's 6'7". He's hitting the ball harder than you've ever seen. And I remember saying to Igor, we're on the bus back to the hotel, and I said, I reckon you should just wear one pink sock tomorrow because then the day after we'll see how many. Because he was the, like.

That guy. And everyone just wanted to be Igor. Oh, he ties his shoes up that way. Maybe that's what I got to do. Oh. And I was like, if you just rock a pink sock or chuck a fucking purple armband, just something random, just so we can see the day after how many kids rock up.

Because whatever you do. They will try. They will try. So anyway, back to the Kardashians. Do you reckon they're at the point where they go, should we just do a dress with the asshole cut out just to see how many fucking idiots copy it? You know what I mean?

It's actually not a bad point. Because I just was sort of going, put me in that room where they're like, all right, girls, skims, next season. Next thing, what should we do? Who's got some ideas? Yeah. And they go, oh, why don't we just like do a piece of clothing that covers your ass but just like not cover your ass?

That is actually such a good point. And they go, that's ridiculous. And then someone goes, yeah, but if we like if Kim, but if you did it like two weeks later, everyone will do it. It's a bit like you know on Mean Girls when Regina like they typically her, they cut the nipples off her tops, but

she walks around with the bra on anyway. And then a week later, everyone's doing it. Okay. Yeah. I'm willing to raise my hand and say maybe the Regina George example was a bit less niche than Eagle the Volleyball. Yeah, more people have seen Mean Girls than Eagle. A bit more relevant.

And for that, in hindsight, the perfect example. They wouldn't have taken us that 10-minute story back to Elpham High. But we're all better for it. You know what? I appreciated it. Thank you. Luckily I was here, though. Yeah.

Once again, butter to my bread. Glad to have you in. Today's not my best day according to Tony. I've got a few comments here. And then because I am the funniest person on this podcast, I've written a joke. Oh, of course you have. You have to at least give it a go.

You have to pretend to give it a chance before you shit can it. But before I get to that alicia said oh these new designs crack me up and i appreciated that alicia lucinda uh says lucinda says how much of these i'm asking for a friend fuck that's funny now this i need to get the words right for my unbelievable joke because it's a bit wordy which I know is not a good starting point. Okay. If you observe me with depression or if you witness Dwayne Johnson

in this dress, you will see what rock bottom really looks like. What? Oh, God. If you observed me with depression. Yep. Maybe it's the depression thing just bringing people down. It's not supposed to be a down joke. Yeah, it kind of comes down.

If you observed me with depression or if you witnessed Dwayne Johnson in this dress. What about if you saw me on a bad day, on an off day instead of depression? Yeah, all right. Beep, beep. a bad day, on an off day instead of depression. Yeah, all right. Beep, beep.

If you observe me after a massive night out or if you witness Dwayne Johnson in this dress, you'd know what rock bottom really looked like. Ah! That is so funny. Is that the one you wrote? Just workshopping, Just workshopping. No, I love it. I'm imagining you with rocks on your bottom. To be honest, my favourite comment on here is the ones that just say Kimberly.

What's with that? Kim Kardashian. Yeah, but like. But they're obviously like Kimberly. Yeah. Like. Mate. Kimberly.

Kimberly. Stop it. Like full name, Kimberly. So should I buy one? I've alreadyberley. Yeah. Like. Mate. Kimberley. Kimberley. Stop it. Like full name, Kimberley. So should I buy one? I've already ordered one. Great. Easily influenced. Ordered it on my car phone.

All right, let's do what you love to see and get the hell out of here. Oh my gosh, sorry. I'm just closing my peephole dress. My love to see it for today. Closing your peephole. stress. My love to see it for today is this young girl who was going to prom. And you know how it's kind of common, you see these stories occasionally online that like, they write, someone will write to a celebrity and be like, will you come to my prom with me? And sometimes they do it.

Yep. I love those stories. Like I think Jennifer Hawkins, who is like Miss Universe, she's an Australian. She went to like some guy's ball with him like a few years ago, oh, probably fucking 15 years ago now. But those kinds of stories are really lovely. Well, this girl loves Danny DeVito. Yeah, righto.

And he wasn't available or she couldn't get in touch with him or something. So she just actually went to prom with a cardboard cutout of Danny DeVito and she's added a tie and a little boutonniere flower, which is quite cute, isn't it? Well, if you can't get the real deal, just plan B. Exactly. She was committed.

I think that Danny DeVito found out about this after the fact. I think that maybe it went viral. So after seeing it, he took a cardboard cutout of the young girl on set to an Always Sunny filming. And so he's on set of Always Sunny with the picture of this girl. That's so good. It's a cardboard cutout. I fucking lost it. I thought that's so cute. That's so good. It's a cardboard cutout. I fucking lost it.

I thought that's so cute. That's so good. I love Danny DeVito. He does such lovely shit, eh? Yeah. He's a lovely guy. He's a really nice guy. Yeah.

What a mad dog. Hey, what sort of TV do you have? What size? Oh, I don't know. Oh, Torb's actually just measured it the other day because I think he wants to get a new one. I was asking him about it. 55-inch, I think. It's not like now you can get fucking 85-inch TVs and stuff.

It's so huge. So we're moving house and our TV is like little. And so we're like, oh. And shit, it's not even a smart TV. Yeah, so we finally thought maybe we'll upgrade. So I put on Instagram, like, how big is your TV? How do you find it? And there was a lot of great people going, yeah, I got the 75, but now that we've got it, a 65

might have been fine. Sure. A lot of people going, oh, I got the 85. I thought it was crazy, but once you get it, you're like, fuck, this is pretty cool. Yeah. And so I'm just trying to get a lot of ideas, recommendations, lots of vibes. And it, because it depends on, like, how big the room is, how big the wall is, all that shit. Yeah, and we've discussed, we were talking

about this before, but are you for the one that kind of looks like a piece of art? I really like it. Yeah, I think I like that as well. I just like it because I think it's like even when it's off, it looks nice. Yeah. Whereas like when you've just got like a huge black TV, like when it's off it's just a TV. Yeah, it's the black square

on your wall. Like, you know what I mean? I kind of vibe the the frame tv so i said on instagram how big's yours what's your vibe let's chat tvs i might be in the market yeah and this lovely tarpa i won't add her because i don't know if she was being funny or whatever okay but i said how big and people like yep 55 or the 65 75 whatever and she goes so when i've got my left fingertips and I'm standing at it, it goes from the end of my left arm to about my right collarbone. And it's fine.

Well, so that's good. So when you go to Harvey Norman, just take her with you. Some girl I've never met said about the size of one of her arms and her torso. Yeah, turns out she's actually an infant. Yeah, for reference, how old are you? She's like, oh, I'm 7 foot 7. She's like, I'm in the 75th percentile of people from 25 to 7.

It was just like so perfectly. It was like 75, 85, 75, 65, 75. About an arm and a bit of someone I don't know. But I'm like, thank you for like, I asked the question. Yeah, you did. You sent an answer. Yeah. Imagine if she's.

She's got like a really long arm. A really short one. She's got a a really long arm. A really short one. She's got a fucking projector screen. You know, I can't deal with this today. First the car phone, now this. Well, thank you so much for listening. Sorry about the derailment on the car phone. I fucking love the car phone.

Don't apologise. I'm not going to apologise. Hang on, question. Question. For everyone. Does anyone, not that you might use it, but does anyone have a car that's got a car phone in it? Like an actual, we're not talking about how my car,

like Apple CarPlay. Yeah, no. We're talking like the physical. Car phone. Yeah. Because I'm guessing maybe someone's pop has his car in the garage that he's driven once in 10 years and it's just out in the shed. But it's like. But it's got the car phone on it?

Because if you've got one, give us the number and we'll ring you. Is he up to date? Is it a prepaid? How does that work? Yeah, I don't know. How did it work? You know what? This is actually not the fucking car phone podcast.

No, it is. More tomorrow on the car phones. Oh, my God. No, there is not going to be more tomorrow. Do not hold your breath. Love you, mate. See? But seriously, there won't be any tomorrow because we want you to come back.

We will not talk about car phones again. You have our word. One more time. At some stage. One more time. Yeah, give us one. Maybe it'll be in five years. Maybe it's tomorrow.

No, because people will reply. So there might be maybe, let's say next week, we'll revisit and see if any tarpers have car phones and then we'll move on. Okay, and then we will never talk about car phones until next time. Until we have our word.

Until we read the replies from those replies. Love you, bye. Call me, beat me if you want to reach me on my car phone. For a limited time, switch to Shopify Point of Sale and you could save up to 20% and improve your bottom line. We're so serious about savings, we've made this ad 20% shorter.

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