Toni and Ryan - Condoms and a meat pie

Episode Date: January 11, 2022

Two things I bet your never expected to see in the same sentence - but it might be something that saves your one night stand! Love ya! Toni xxx Check out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What is happening? Konnichiwa. Konnichiwa. Hello. Hi, Nadoka. How are you? I'm great. I was waiting for this call.

Well, we're trying to run on time, but as you know, Ryan is always late. How dare you. How dare you. Right, right. But it's Tony and Ryan. It's so lovely to chat. Hi.

I love you too. Aw, thank you. We love you. And I need you to explain something to us. You said when you come and visit in Osaka in Japan, let me fill you up with famichikis and Pizza Man. Famichickis and Pizza Man, yeah. What is this? So, Nidoka and I have chatted

on Instagram before. Oh, don't I just feel left out. Because I don't know if you know this, but I've been to Japan. Have you been to Japan? I have. I have been to Japan. And I said to Nidoka, I would love to come back and this is so embarrassing that the thing that I liked most about Japan was like food that you can get from the 7-Eleven.

The fried chicken from Family Mart is called Fummy Chicky and they do these little, you know, like when you get a pork bun, like the ones with all the dough on the outside, you get those, but it's like a cheesy bun and it's got beef and, like, cheese on the inside and it's like a pizza, beef. Whilst this does sound delicious, Nadoka, is this really embarrassing for Japan as a whole that that's what Tony remembers?

No, no, I'm really happy that she had a memory here staying in Japan. And it's just a great excuse to go back. And it was famichiki. Yeah, and Nadoka can show us the better places to eat next time. Now, would you say that the cultural references in the Tony and Ryan podcast translate to a Japanese audience?

That's a no. That's a no. That's a soft no. That's a no That's a no That's a soft no Well, since I was listening to I grew up in California And I stayed there until fifth grade And I came back to Japan

And then moved to Germany And then came back to Japan and all that And although I can speak English Like I can pronounce the English words Like an American My vocabulary has stopped at fifth grade kind of. And so listening to your podcast, it kind of, it kind of, it brings you back to fifth grade because I also have the vocabulary of a

fifth grader. I'm learning new words and I keep myself like, I, I like to listen to English and then I can keep up my English listening to your podcast. I love it. So it's educational. It's educational. Yeah.

You're welcome. I've always said that. Yeah. Should we get an approval in Japanese? Oh, that would be great. Yeah, that's fun. All right. So, I mean, I'm not obviously going to tell you what to say.

Yeah. Because I don't know. Yeah. Do you just want to say in Japanese, hi, it's Nadoka from Japan and I approve this podcast? Okay. Wait a minute. My brain is in English mode.

Yes. So just give me a moment. It's okay. Ryan doesn't even have a mode. He just speaks. He's just grade five English all the time. I'm Nadoka from Japan. I approve this podcast. That is so cool.

Tony's face is lit up like a Christmas tree. Oh, my gosh. I just, I wish that I could speak more than one language. It is incredible to me that other people can switch their brain like that. Like, we just listen to Nadoka's brain, like, switch to a different language, like, as if that happened, Jacinne. That's amazing. Nadoka, thank you so much for your time. And I know that you listen to every single podcast of ours religiously and you're a big part of the Patreon

and we love seeing your name pop up. So thank you so much for all of your support. Yeah, we love it. Thank you so much for your fun podcast. It makes my day. That's lovely. That makes us so happy. But have a great day and go and get yourself some Fummy Chickies. Yeah. Fummy Chickies soon. Thank you.

Thank you. You too. Bye, Nodoka. Bye. We don't have a segment called, like, gross or nah, right? Oh, my God, why? What is it? So, coming up after normal or nah. Yeah.

Someone has sent through a story of a one-night stand that happened here in Melbourne. Yeah. Some people. Got a lot of Australian stuff this week. Oh, we're back. It's almost like last week we were like, no one in Australia listens and they've picked up their game.

Yeah. Or it's like, hey, guys, we get it. You're in Australia. We get it. You're telling stories about us. It sounds like we're overcompensating. Yeah. Are we? Yes. We get it. You're telling stories about us. It sounds like we're overcompensating. Yeah. Yeah.

Are we? Yes. Oh, no. Yeah? Yeah? No. Yeah. No?

No. Yes. No. No? Tony and I are fighting, by the way. We're not fighting. We're all good now. Are we?

Yeah. Okay. I just made you a green tea. It was a good one. Thank you. It was delicious green tea. And it gave me some tiny teddies that I stole from one of the girls at work. Thank you, Nonna.

I used to work here, so I feel like I still do. Some people will say what happened on this one-night stand is genius, but I think 98% will say that's the grossest fucking thing I've ever heard and I'm interested, Tony, to see where you land on that. But first. Okay, so I've got a normal Nonna about names, but just before that, on this podcast, obviously it's called Tony or Ryan.

Tony or Ryan. I'll go with Tony, thanks. Oh, that's sweet. I'd always choose you. I'd always choose Ryan. And you often call me Tony Felicia Lodge. Yeah. And it's caused a little bit of confusion online

because then I have at times mentioned my birth middle name, not my given middle name from you, which is Louise. And people say, why did she say Louise? I thought her middle name was Felicia. It's not. And there's another part of my life that is confused now because of you. So my boyfriend, Torbs, been together for seven years, doing it for eight.

More than eight, that was. We call him Torbs. Yes. for seven years, doing it for eight. What an eight that was. We call him Torbs. Yes. And it's a nickname. So people, I get messages a lot like, what is Torbs? Is that a name? Is that a thing that you. It's a nickname.

Is it a vibrator that you're calling your boyfriend? Like what's going on? Imagine if that after all this time. He wasn't a person. You're doing it for eight together for seven. Yeah. And you always, when you like full name Torbs, if he's in trouble or you can't believe something,

you say Alex Torbenstein. Yeah, Torbenstein, which is also not his name. Not his name. I saw a comment on TikTok and it was us doing a joke and it was some video. You can follow us on TikTok, by the way, Tony.Lodge or Ryan. John Dunn.

John Dunn. There you go. Ryan John was taken. Yeah, I hate that. I hate that. Tony Lodge with no dot was taken, so I had to do this. Yeah, you've got to hate that. Anyway, there was a comment on TikTok and it said,

Torbs, why does she say Torbs? Is it a nickname? And someone said, yeah, it's a nickname. His real name is Alex Torbenstein. And I saw it and I was like, God, people really pay attention on this podcast. Both incorrect. Which one's true?

Neither. Neither. Do we deliberately avoid his last name? Well, it's not on purpose. I'm pretty sure we've said it, but I think that more often you've obviously said Torbenstein and it's just... Yeah, his real name's actually Alex Toblerone. He is the heir to the fortune of the chocolate.

Yeah. Also, I have done a few videos for Toblerone and I can't spell Toblerone. You can't spell anything? Yeah, but when they're like, oh, you need to tag us. And how do, Toblerone. T-O-B-L-E-R. See, I don't put the L in.

So I'm writing Toblerone. Toblerone. And they're like, hey, Ryan, thanks, mate. If you could say Toblerone instead of Toblerone every single time. Oh, bless you. But anyway, shout out to Alex Toblerone and the Toblerone family. And the Toblerone chocolate. No, Swiss. Yeah. That'slerone chocolate. No, Swiss.

That's funny from you. It is Swiss. Thank you. Good job. Thank you. Did you know that the little triangle has a bear in it? Only recently, though. Yeah, it's a good one, isn't it?

When I found that out, I was like. Yeah, I know. Google the Toblerone logo right now and you won't believe that there's a bear in it. Yeah, it's actually Alex's dad. Torb's dad. Torb's dad. It's a bear. Torb's his dad. Torb's his dad.

It's a bear. Let's not confuse people even further and add an Alex in. All right. Normal or nah? Wait till I tell you about Steve. No, that's the vibrator's name. Okay. Normal or nah?

Normal or nah? Still calling your parents mummy and daddy. At what age? Any age older than Cuteness As an adult Yeah, as an adult Even a teenager I'm going to go straight off the bat

And say nah Okay Obviously, Tony, N.A. She's just spat the water out of her Frank Green water bottle. Oh, N-A. That's funny. Not applicable. TBC.

TBC. Surely that's a nah. And I want you to think about this. Yeah. Torbs comes into the room. He's spoken to the king of Toblerone. Mr. Toblerone, yeah. Senior.

And he walks back into the kitchen and goes, oh about that i was just chatting with daddy uh yeah no not for me well so this has come from stephanie on patreon and she says i just found out that my 29 year old friend still calls his parents mommy and daddy when he refers to them, he says Mum slash Dad, but in their company he has to address them as Mummy and Daddy and they've actually had arguments about it. So Steph's friend has... Arguments, not just like, oh, that's a bit weird, oh, whatever. No. Like arguments.

So Steph's friend has said, it's really embarrassing that you asked me to call you Mummy and Daddy and the mum broke down in tears over it and said you're trying to rip this family apart kind of thing. What? So he does it to preserve his mum and dad's feelings, Mummy and Daddy, and the mum broke down in tears over it and said you're trying to rip this family apart kind of thing. What? So he does it to preserve his mum and dad's feelings, mummy and daddy's feelings. Apparently Steph's friend has siblings that are, you know, over 30.

And they're forced to. And they call mummy and daddy also. Do mummy and daddy have some issues? Maybe mummy and daddy have lots of money and you're willing to keep them happy. The toddler on fortune is at stake. I mean, we can't let that milky chocolate coins go to waste. Coins? maybe mummy and daddy have lots of money and you're willing to keep them happy. The toddler on fortune is at stake. I mean, we can't let that milky chocolate coins go to waste.

Coins? Coins. That, putting that pressure on the kids, because it sounds like the kids are kind of a bit nah as well. Yeah, well, I think that to your point earlier, to a certain point, it's fine, it's sweet and it's endearing because you're like, oh, come give mummy a cuddle. Like, that's nice. That's nice.

And I always called my mum and dad mummy and daddy, like, as I was growing up. Into what age, though? Oh, I don't feel like there's an age. You kind of just transition out of that, like, cute, like. Do you have any memory of you in high school still using the term mummy or daddy? Probably not mummy, but probably like mama.

Yeah. Like I called my mum Mamula a lot. Your old Italian mother. Mamula. So like nicknames of mum, but not specifically mummy because mummy is very like mummy and daddy. Yeah. Without knowing their financial thing, it sounds like a very posh,

we watched Titanic this week. Yes. It feels like something that would happen in that. Should we call my mum? Must be nice. Okay. Yeah, we can. So you should say, hi, mummy, and see what she says.

Oh, no, I feel it's so awkward, even the thought of that. Hello? Hello, mummy. It's your son, Ryan. Hello, Ryan. How are you? Good. Is it weird that I just called you that?

I'm with Tony, by the way. Hi, Mandy. Hello. Hello, Tony. How are you? Merry I'm with Tony, by the way. Hi, Mandy. Hello. Hello, Tony. How are you? Merry Christmas. Happy New Year. Merry Christmas.

Gosh, she sounds a lot happier to talk to me than she did to you, didn't she? Oh, that's what they say. That's terrible. That's what someone put in the comments one time and I felt really guilty. And I put me back to Ryan. Hello, Ryan, darling. How are you? Oh, good, Mummy.

Thanks. Thank you. We were just literally having a conversation about when is it too old to use the term Mummy and Daddy versus Mum and Dad. How old would I have been, do you reckon? Oh, that's interesting. He used to call me Mandy, though, a lot of the time. He didn't call me Mum.

Ryan, really? That's not okay. We don't do that. No, he did. When? Why? When you were little, you just did because that's who you heard people call me. No one else calls you mum.

Why would I know? It would be weird if I still called you mummy though, right? It would be a little weird. Yeah, thanks. And do you know why I made this call and not Tony? Yeah. My mum didn't answer. My mummy didn't answer.

Yeah, I know. She's sending you messages, though. She's listening to the podcast. I hope not. I hope not. I would love for messages to be sent back and forth to the heavens, but I sure as hell hope it's not this fucking podcast. All right, see you later, Mummy.

See you. Oh, well, okay, see you, Ryan. Oh, she's upset that you're hanging up on her. Oh. She wants to chat. Oh, no, okay. She's trying to wrap this up. Okay, see you. Sorry.

Bye. I'll have a chat with you later. Ring me. Call me. Oh, what's wrong, Mandy? Yeah, what's up? Well, usually I have a two-second conversation because when I ring, it's quick, quick, I'm doing something, hurry up, tell me what you need

to do, and then he's gone. Alright, I'll call you soon. It sounds to me like you're not really fully appreciating that your mum wants to chat with you and spend time with you. What I would give for that. Yeah, interesting. Okay, talk later, Ryan. wants to chat with you and spend time with you, what I would give for that. Yeah, interesting. Okay, talk later, Ryan. Yeah, great, I'll wrap you up. Yeah, okay, I've got things to do.

I've got things to do, mate. You've got your own podcast. It ain't my podcast. Yeah, I don't care about this. If you want to subscribe to Mandy Dunn's murmurs. Oh, my God, and it's called What's Mandy Dunn? That's quite funny. That is quite funny.

Yeah. Yeah. As someone with the last name Dunn, I've never heard anything like that in my whole life. Oh, fucking hell. First your mother, now this. Wait till I call your mother. Not my mother. No, it was a saying.

Oh. But like in general. Oh, it's not a fair shot. Play the scene. I'm Nodoka from Japan. I will confirm this podcast. A big thank you to some of our champion tapas that are supporting us over at our Patreon, patreon.com slash Tony and Ryan.

Why do I sound like I'm doing like a safety video on an aeroplane? I wonder if my mum's subscribed. We should have asked her. She wouldn't. She's probably paid you enough money. She would have had to buy you. I wonder if my mum subscribed. We should have asked her. She wouldn't. She's probably paid you enough money. She would have had to buy you. Like when you adopt a dog. No, we discussed this.

Oh, yeah. Remember we called her and she's like, no, I was free. They were just trying to get rid of me. You're in the bargain bin. I was in the bargain bin. You're like, oh, we don't have any of the good ones. What about that guy? Yeah, oh, he's a bit of a hodgepodge.

Just take him. But he's all right. He needs a bit of work, but you can train him in. You probably didn't shut up even before you couldn't talk. Wait. Even before you could talk. Fuck. Anyway. Big thank you to our champion. I'm having a fucking cooker of a day

today. James Douglas, thank you. Glenn Capel, Lucas Rigdon and Evan M. Evan M. I didn't know if you were saying Eminem or Evanescence. Marshall Mathers is part of our patron Eminem. Tomorrow on the show. You've got a bit of an update for us.

A phone call to a hairdresser. Are you promising a phone call? With a poopy towel. Are you promising a phone call? Let me check my texts. Tomorrow. We're getting there. We're doing everything we can. Tomorrow. But're getting there. We're doing everything we can.

Tomorrow. But when you've done something as terrible as Ryan has, you know, if someone shot on my towel, I don't think I'd answer their calls. Maybe that's the question we should have asked ourselves before this. Yeah, I know. Anyway, all right, imagine this. It's hard for us to imagine because we've been in relationships for a while.

How long have you been with Torbenstein? Doing it for seven. No, together for seven, doing it for eight. When's that going to get upgraded? When does it become together for eight, doing it for nine? September. September the 19th. Oh, you remember the exact day.

Yeah. Let me put that in my diary. I'll send you some flowers. You won't. No. It was your wedding anniversary last week on the 29th of December, wasn't it? Thank you very much.

Did you send me a gift? No. Let's not get into who sent who gifts because I still haven't delivered your Kris Kringle present. And I also dropped you off to buy the flowers so that I kind of helped with that. You did. Thank you very much.

Yeah. I've got a car. Pretty cool. You're pretty cool. Imagine this. You've met someone on Tinder. I just don't think I could do Tinder. They come back to your place and it was very clear like in the messages

exchange and when you met, I think they met at a bar, that it was just like a hookup thing. Oh, okay. Everyone's on the same page. We're just, hey, we're two young people. Let's get this. So had they been chatting a lot or was it kind of like meet me tonight, let's fuck?

Yeah, but they met at a bar. Yeah, but like had it been like a week's worth of working up to it or? I'm not sure. Because I like to know the backstory. All I know is the vibe was, we know, it's a hook-up. It's getting in. It's a hook-up. It's getting in. My's a hooker. It's getting in.

My God, who am I? They stay the night and in the morning there's some hugging and kissing and it seems like there could be a round two before they leave and they both move on with their life. Like, you know, you wake up kind of spooning and you're like, oh, we're going to go again here. Yeah. Oh, mate, overachiever.

In attempting round two, a Melbourne man has done something I believe 2% of people will think is a great idea and 98% will think is the most disgusting thing they've ever heard of. Are you in the two or the 98? I'm in the 98, but I'll be interested to hear what you say. Okay. Let me read this. Alison from Flemington.

Okay. Let me read this. Alison from Flemington. Okay. When we got back to my place, luckily he had one condom that wasn't expired in his wallet, so we got down to it. But because we had a few drinks and a bit else when we were out and about and met each other, he wasn't able to finish. Fair enough.

Which after a few drinks happens. Yeah. We went to go again in the morning and he used the last condom. The night before? Yeah. Oh, okay. So he legit says, let's see if we can revive last night's one because he didn't finish into it.

And he picked it up off the floor with the intention of somehow getting it back on to use again. The word revive as well. Fuck off. He used the word revive. Off the floor. Who just flicks it onto the floor, by the way? Yeah, I didn't even think about that.

That's just... Alison in Flemington said, I laughed in his face and said, absolutely not in horror. I went for a shower and asked that they not be in my apartment when I got back from the bathroom. Fair enough, Alison. That is... Let's revive. Is there anyone who would go, oh, ingenious,

don't waste two when you can just use one? Or if it was the difference between not doing it and doing it, oh, what a clever idea. As if. Because he, again, he might just be that one or 2%. Because he, according to Alison, and obviously she goes on, but he was genuinely like, what a great idea. Like, I'm a fucking maverick.

Like, he was pretty chuffed with himself at the thought of it. Like you said, who flicks it onto the floor? First of all. That is ridiculous. But also picking it up off the floor and going, can I put this in your body? Like, sorry? No.

She did mention that she would assume it was covered in her dog's hair or whatever else. Yeah, that's what I'm thinking. Yeah, like lint from your jumpers and stuff. But wouldn't a gentleman. Well, okay. Yeah, let's presume. Wouldn't you hope that someone you'd hooked up with was kind enough

to go, hey, so this penis-having individual says, hey, we've got no condoms but let me take care of you. Wouldn't that have been option one? He should have done that. Of course he's going to call him back after that. If he's going, hey, you just lay back, I'll take care of you. Sexy. If people want to impress Tony, write notes because she's given clues here.

But, like, surely that would be your first instinct to be like, okay, we obviously can't have sex unprotected. We don't know each other. We're not planning on exchanging STDs or children. Yep. Let's not do this. Okay. How is his first instinct to go, oh, hang on,

there's a dinger on the floor. Let's fucking. Cool. Are you blowing it up? No, that was me blowing the dog hair off. Hang on, doll. I'll just rinse this in the sink. Hang on.

Oh, you've got half a glass of water next to the bed. I'll pour it over. All right, there's a few assumptions that have and have not been made with your commentary here. Oh, okay. Have I missed something bad? No, no, no. No, not at all.

Well, when you say he's a gentleman, I think you've... No, this is not a gentleman. If he was. This is not a gentleman. This is a dirty, gross boy. A boy. A boy. The worst kind.

Second of all, my biggest issue, if he knew he was meeting a Tinder hookup at a bar and they're having a few drinks, have more than one condom that's not past its use by date, bud. I mean, what did you, like, if that's your intention was to go there and do that thing. There's just so much about this story that is so bothersome. Alison, I'm so sorry this happened.

I just can't believe, his first instinct was to pick, like, all of that aside, all of that horrible shit aside, that he could have done a billion things in the lead up. Yep. Why wouldn't you just go, I don't have any more condoms, like let me take care of you, or how about I run to the 7-Eleven, I'll grab us a coffee and, you know, like you could say that in a sexy way. You could be like, how about before this I go grab us some croissants and I come back in.

That's a great, cute idea. Oh, my God. I would be such a good single person. Also. Except for the fact that I'm a freak. Yep. When you're, so they met at a bar and if he had as much to drink and consume as we think, obviously, like, it was a biggish night.

Yeah. Wouldn't, when you travel from wherever that was back to her house. You're going, oh, we've got to stop at the 7-Eleven and get some Johnnies. You would say it exactly like that. You would because in the back of an Uber you're like, oh, we've got to stop at the 7-Eleven and get some Johnnies. You would say it exactly like that. You would because in the back of an Uber you're like, oh, fuck. And I think that's sort of the code word, well, not code word because, I mean, it is what it is, but you're aware what you have and don't have. You go, oh, I might just stop in here and get a water or just something.

Yeah, anything. Have you been in that situation where you're like, oh, I better grab a Powerade. I'm feeling like I'm going to have a bad hangover in the morning. I think when you're that blind, you don't even need it. You go, I'll stop at the server, and they're like, yeah. No, because like you could be getting a pie or a... A pie?

No, because like when you're on the way home from a night out. You need some food. Need some food, whatever. They should sell condoms in the Maccas drive-thru. That is a great idea. That is such a good idea. Why don't they? So then when you go, yeah, can I get a large chips and a double cheeseburger

and also can I get some Trojans on the way out as well, please? Did I say Trojan? I meant extra small. Trojan's the brand. You heard what I said. I think that's a great idea. That is a good idea. Also.

That's fucking so smart for me. Oh, what? What? Can you buy condoms on Uber Eats now? That's a good idea. You know how they're... They would be $65, but you'd be able to. I think at the time that you needed a condom,

you'd be like, just pay the money, I'm ready to go. Yeah. Because I think Uber Eats are getting into, like, groceries. Yes, yeah, and you can order from the IGA or the server or whatever. But can you imagine the guy delivering that? Like, all they've got is a, you know, grocery bag with a fucking one packet of condoms. Okay, hang on.

What's the worst thing that you could be purchasing alongside a box of condoms? I think you had it right with the pie. I just can't imagine. Yeah, can we get a Mrs. Max pie and then just, yeah, ripped if you got them? Yeah, great. Like, that is horrific.

What a horrible bag. What about if it was like, oh, hi, did you order the condoms and the whipped cream and the strawberries and the banana and this frozen like Zoopa Doopa? Yeah, I just need some condoms and a Kit Kat. It's like an energy pack. Condoms and a Powerade. We've stopped this music because I'm going to die.

Yeah, I know. I'm going to start it again. But one time, no jokes. Oh, my God, tell me what. I love stories. I had to go to the supermarket to get, remember the Adobro sauce? Oh, yeah. Maybe it was Adobro, but it was like a chilli sauce. Yep. I needed to get a chilli sauce. I didn't get it with the big thing, so I had to go back remember the Adobro sauce? Oh yeah. Which I, maybe it was Adobro, but it was like a

chilli sauce. Yep. I needed to get a chilli sauce. I didn't get it with the big thing so I had to go back to the store and I actually don't mind, like I'm the one in our house that will just like run and grab a couple of things. Yeah, you're very good with that. I'm that guy. So I had to just go get this hot sauce and then I get this text on the way going can you also get some toilet paper?

Oh. Oh. I'm like condoms and hot sauce? Ryan, what are you talking about? So, all I've only two, like, those amongst the whole trolley? Yeah. Fine. But when you rock up and you've just got, like, hot sauce and toilet paper and the chicken.

It's like a before and after shock. I was just like, whoa. Plan on a big one. I was like. What are you doing? Because it was like 7pm. He's like. What are you doing? Because it was like 7pm. He's like, what are you doing tonight? And I was like, oh.

Can't you tell? Having a feed and letting it rain. I was once buying condoms and all I had was a block of chocolate and a box of condoms and I ran into a primary school teacher that I had. Her name was Mrs Hunt and she used to work in the office and she was like, Tony, it's so great to see you. And I was like, hi. She's like, you've really grown up.

I'm like, more. Okay. You said hi to Miss Hunt. Mrs Hunt, yep. Got some stuff for Mrs... LAUGHTER Finally did it. Finally did it. End the podcast!

Finish this episode. Finish this episode. I have a really wholesome, you love to see it, but I'm not... The two you love to see, I have left a really wholesome and I don't think that they should go after what we've just talked about. I've got this one. My love to see it is a dog on a bus. Oh, cute.

Alex. She said this guy gets on a bus and stares at me and my dog Lulu Bella for like 30 seconds. Yeah. And the guy says to her, you're allowed to have dogs here. And the way he said it kind of is this guy like an undercover ticket inspector or whatever? Just like a bit. Yeah. Confrontational.

Yeah, and she goes, I don't know, it's just this is Lulubella, we're going down the beach. This is Lulubella. And he looks over his shoulders, unzips his jacket. He had a chihuahua in his jacket that he was hiding because he didn't know he was allowed on the bus. And then they sat next to each other and they made doggo friends. Oh, my God.

I thought that was going to go in a really different direction. Same. Yeah, okay. I like that. That's very sweet. Very cute. Nothing better than a hidden dog in a jacket. Very cute.

Sounds like a euphemism. It does. The condoms. The meat pie. The Mrs Hunt. Why are you getting a six-pack at this hour? Oh, I've just got to put a dog in a jacket. Yeah, can I get a packet of condoms and a dog in a jacket?

Just got to put the dog in a jacket. Jeez, protection. Yeah, I always put my dog in a jacket. Don't have any puppies. Better put the dog in a jacket. Oh, these dogs are barking. always put my dog in a jacket. Don't have any puppies. Better put the dog in the jacket. Oh, these dogs are barking. Better put them in the jacket. What was that laugh?

That was amazing. I'm nervous about tomorrow. You got anything to add? You got 40 seconds. Oh, okay. Well, over the last week, I've been meditating a lot, and it's been great. Like at night time.

You got an app? Yeah, I do. That was going to be my recommendation. I've been using the Kik app, the Keep It Clean app. Oh, yeah. But there's heaps of free ones you can use if you want to check it out. But the Kik one is the one that I use and they've got heaps of really good ones and they're all a really good length

and it says like release yourself or anxiety or whatever and it's just reset during the day. It's very, very good. Recommend it. Gets rid of a headache in the middle of a day when you've been sitting at the computer for too long. And do you feel that's calmed you down? No, I think it's all been unwound.

Unwound? Rewound? Reversed. Reversed? All right, before tomorrow, we're both going to meditate. You need to calm down. I need to reduce my anxiety for the phone call. Yeah.

Maybe go back and buy some more toilet paper.