Toni and Ryan - Do NOT Eat This on a First Date

Episode Date: January 28, 2026

Tennis outfits - NORMAL or NAH - Charles on a date - love ya!!!!!Need a Kansas City Photographer - https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100085998114648Sign up to Patreon Here - www.patreon.com/ToniandRyanFAQ and T&C's PODCASTAWAY - www.toniandryan.com.au/podcastawayVideo for this EP is available on YOUTUBECheck out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toniandryanpodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Charles on a first date. First date. Never met this girl in person in real life before. At a pub. Hi, I'm Amanda from Canberra, Australia. I'm Stephanie from Montreal, Canada. This is Taylor from Texas and I approve this podcast. Welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast.

Welcome to the thrilling finale of shoe spraying week. Oh my God. Which shoe murdered which shoe? Um, as I said, yes. He would be into that like a week long story. Let you tell a little bit each day. Like shoe related. Could be shoe related.

Let's start there. But like, what issue should we start with? Hilarious. Oh, a shoe. Oh, I need a tissue. Do you remember that show with David Spade in it? Just shoot me? Do you remember that show?

It's actually a great show. I loved that show. It was a great show. Where did they work in a magazine? Was that it? Blush magazine. Yeah. Yeah.

Fuck. We won the game with that, I feel. Nina was great. Nina, I loved her big hair. Elliot, the photographer was great. And who was the other bird? Maya, the daughter. How on God's earth have you done that?

She was awful. What was she? And Jack Gallo, the boss. Jack. Oh, and the male guy, like the big tall, like, sorry about that. Yeah. Steve Carrell was in it? What?

What? Ashton Kuchar? I can't believe that you named every person accurately. That is on it. That's my love to see it for the day. That was amazing. It was a great show. Yeah, that was the male guy.

Brian Pocene. Was Steve Karelli? That is absolutely. And Ashton Kutcher. Well, he's off, isn't he? We're off him now these days. Dean Kaine? Lucy Lawless?

Oh my God. That's Zena. Great. Did you ever watch Zena? No. Zina the Warrior Princess? Oh, Zena. Don't do that.

I didn't know who Zena was. But I can't believe you never watched Zena. But yeah, that's Lucy Lola. She played Zena. She was like such a hot warrior bitch. Yeah. And she wore like a... Can you Google Zina?

She was hot, eh? Yeah. Was that Lucy Lawless? Yes. And there's a bit in The Simpsons. I'm not Zina. I'm Louis. Lucy Lulles.

Zena can't fly. It kind of looks like it should have been played by Demi Moore. Do you mean Demi Moore? Oh, sorry. Is that who you mean? To Knee Lodge. To knee lodge. Yeah.

Lucy Lawless. Anyway. Thanks tuning in. Have a great day, right? Trip down memory line, isn't it? Can you Google his shoe spraying news, child? Because I am light on content for shoe spraying. Have you sprayed those ones you wearing?

Clearly not. Now, they're not a traditional spraying shoe, but I think the boy. You can scotch guard anything. My mum used to scotch guard my backpack at primary school. That's really smart. I think they should have been because I've been playing pickleball and see how they're getting a bit black and a bit whatever. How's your pickleball going? Yeah, pretty good.

You like it. Pretty good playing tonight, actually. Are you? Yeah. See you down the pickle palace. You're joking. Oh, I'll see you there. You want to come down and play?

I didn't know it was a pickle palace. Pickle Palace. Pickle Palace. Pickle Palace. On Wednesday, we do, whoa, who cares because it's Thursday. Thursday. See you yesterday. Loozer.

On Thursday, we do. normal or nah, thanks for sending these through. I thought, I'm so sorry. I thought you're about to launch into what you do at pickleball on the Thursday. Like on the Thursday, we do like a couple of rounds and then we do this. We hit the ball over the net. Yeah, who's a net? We have to make that thing.

Oh. When did we talk about that? What thing? It's a picture of me playing pickleball, but instead of there being an net, it's just a lady called Annette laying in the middle of the court and it's just an arrow and it says, Annette. Should we make that? Tarpers that are actually called Annette because we don't fuck around.

If you are a tarpa called a net message through today. In Melbourne. Like we, no, just take a photo of yourself laying on the ground like this and then we'll photoshop it. Oh, I thought you meant we'll get them together and we'll do a big thing. That is so funny.

Well, yeah, I try my best. Do you know what I mean? Every day I put my boob on one time at a tit. So I lost all senses of everything in my life. We all just questioned what we were doing with our lives. People listening to this show are going,

is this what I've chosen to listen to this morning? Can I say something? Is this the brain break I needed? I need you guys to answer me a question. Did time slow down? Yeah. Same because I went, yeah, really like slowed right down.

So on Thursdays we do normal or nah, send them through to tony and Ryan.com.com. Or in the Tony and Ryan Facebook group, please submit them. I love it. We know that that sounds a bit old school of Facebook group. but it's actually just a really great place, isn't it? Everyone's lovely. Come on over.

Yeah. Just a couple of friends hanging out, sharing memes talking shit. Put your boob on one time with a tit. Hmm. So true. It's sort of like there's no one-upman's ship. It's not like tit for tat, you know? No, it's just tit at a time.

One tit at a time. That's what Charles does. Well, maybe not actually after you hear about his date after this. Now, Ta-Pa, Vic is sent this through. Hey, Vic. And Vic. Are you sure it's not Ta-Tapa in New South Wales? Are you okay?

I think you just... Oh my God. We all just saw that. Do you? Sorry, I just like fully plugged out for a second. Imagine. Like, so much oxygen came out. I laughed so hard at me making the New South Wales joke.

Imagine if you went to the doctor and they were like, what brought on the dizzy spells? And you go, I was laughing so hard. So you know how Nick? And the doctor goes, oh my God, that's crazy. Who told the joke and what was it? And you go, well, I told it. And you know how Vic can be a state and a name. Yeah.

Well, you wouldn't belated. Yeah, Doc, you wouldn't see this coming. So someone mentioned Vic and I was like, oh, it didn't mean New South Wales and then I passed away. I laughed so hard on my own shit joke that my brain stopped working. It's been happening for a while. There's no long-term effects. Oh, okay. A foot rub or?

I'll take a break. Do you want me to rub your arm? What? Do you want to rub your arm? Why? And why just one? Tell me more about what you've just said. What are you going to fucking just give me one of these ones?

Oh, it's happening. It's happening live. My left arm. Oh. By his arms now. Tony's arm is now underneath Ryan. Tony touched my Gooch. Speaking of Gooch.

She touched my stitches. Get back up on that chair. Sorry. Get back up on that chair. I'm so sorry. Get back up on that chair. No, you need to explain. Explain yourself right this second.

Excuse them why? Nothing to explain. Stitchers. What? What? Well, you got stitches in your coach. I don't have stitches. It just...

I think people will know what I mean. What does it mean? Get back in your chair. do we need to cut that. Oh my God, need another massage. Can we do? I can't afford one. You know,

I'll get gashed again. Four days ago, I said, I've had a big week. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. See, this is what happens on shoe spraying week. She just gets wild. Yeah.

One time at a time. Hey, also, tonight we're going to the Australian Open tennis. I'm not going to ask how the costumes are coming along. You'll have to find out for yourself. tonight and Tony will have to figure that out as up the afternoon. Stay tuned. You also have to shave your face because in the photos, Travis has a mustache only. So,

hope you brought your razor, quadrofer women, something. I could do that actually because I've got one. I've only shaved my legs with like twice. It's still pretty sharp. How high up to go? Just to the knee.

I'm not a whore. Come on, mate. No, I do. It's summer. I do shin, then I do knee, then I sometimes will do the top of the thigh. Not always though, depends how fancy it is.

What about the top of the top of the thigh? Then I skip it and then just do the bush. Yeah. Yeah. Thanks for asking. So we'll be at the tennis tonight. If you want to watch the women's semi-finals, you'll see us maybe in the crowd. You will.

If they cut to the, you go, if that Taylor Swift and Travis Kelsey, no, it was just Tony and I. Imagine if they're there as well. And they're like, oh, my God, we wore the same thing. Who so? Taylor Swift, Clark Tarpavik Samas not out

Northern Territory Tasmania Thank you Charles He did the worst one Nah I take that back I love Tasmania Take that back

Now that's fully Take that back Now that's fully redacted I love Tasmania When Tasmania has an AFL team They're going to be my second team Yep I mean basically

Because Hawthorne is How we have an affinity with Tasmania. Yeah. Yeah. We are as one. I loved Tasmania one movie. Oh, you changed the tune. No.

Did you hear? Should we just get through this episode and fucking. Yeah, I'm so sorry. And get you home, put you to bed. You know how the other day I said, could we have a chicken parmesan and then we didn't do that? Could we do that today? No, you need to be put. I'm not being seen in public with you like this.

Things are happening. Do you want to drink water? Do you want me to rub my arm? I'm getting deja vu. Deja-mo. normal or no who's this type of a sorry

eating ice cream from the bottom up my dad bites the bottom of a cornetto and then slurps out the cream from the base this is tapovic's dad by the way who does it in public with Tarpavik

and he's like dad dude gobbin on a slonger yeah the thing's schlobbing on a gobbler Yeah, you eat the chocolate plug and then you keep going. Oh!

Okay. But I don't know why it's so much worse that it's Vick's dad, but it just is. And you're like, Dad, for fuck's sake, we're on a train on the way to these train open. Can you get it together? Yeah. Do it at home in the rumpus room. Eat you. What?

Do it at home in the rumpus room. Why did that sound like a guessing cludo? Was it my dad sucking off a cornet? in the rumpus room? Was my dad gobbin on a schlonger in the rumpus room? I don't like that because I don't like, do you know something that I really hate is having sticky hands? And when you...

Says the girl who just fingered me. Oh, tell me all about it. No, it's like really the sensory overload of like having sticky hands. It's why I always get an ice cream in a cup. Same. I hate a cone. Yeah. It just gets, you get so sticky.

I don't like it. And so if I've like eaten something and I've got some of my hands, I'm just like, I can't, don't really know what to do with it. And so that just is such a nightmare fuel. So when my hands are dirty from dinner because I eat like a fucking disgusting human. Yeah. Or if it's like a wings or something, you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Even though I'm about to wash up and like get my hands dirty, I'll still like wash my hands first, even though I'm about to get them dirty again.

Because I'm like, I just, but I don't know if I told you this before, but I also you don't do the wash. up. So like null in boyd, but yeah, I get it. I wash up every night. No, you don't. No, you don't. You don't. Well, because Bridge does mummy put down because Bambles sometimes doesn't want

daddy put down. Fair. She's going through a mum phase of put downs, which is fine. So then, like, I'll do the kitchen. Why? And would anyone like to mention anything that happened in the office this week? That you took the bin down? No.

And then you didn't know where the bags were and then someone else had to replace her. Yeah, then Lily said I had a boy's look. No, after you left the other day, Tony, Ryan, did go over and do all the washing up that was in the sink. Did you? And made sure everyone, you about it. Oh, take that way.

So you know, yeah. No, so the other week when you said, no, when I do, you guys, when I do a good deed, the thing is that you just do, you don't do it for the praise after. Ha ha ha, ha, you didn't say that. Yeah, I did. And then you happened to accuse me of something. and then Charles has leapt to my defence.

And here we are. Having a good time. Here we fuck it out. Here we are. Can I tell a story about, so I always, if I go to an ice cream shop, won't get the cone.

No, you can't. I just get the little cup because when I was little, yeah, Mr. Whippy like came to my street in a Lambie Drive album. And you know the sound like the van coming.

And I was like, fuck yeah, Mr. Whippies here. No, that's Harry Potter. And so I was real little and I was like, I've been keeping my coins in like my bedside thing. So I like ran and I got, I was like, mom, they're here and she's like, yeah, we'll get your coins and go again. And so I got the coins and I ran up the street and I got.

Sorry, that is so fucking adorable. Yeah. So I got my ice cream cone and the guy goes, you know, pops the ice cream. Yeah. And I was probably like 80 meters from my house. Oh. How old would you be? seven or eight baby

nice and so I get it already saving money yeah this guy can do it all I what the money bit's actually crazy when I tell you the end of this but the 20 cents

no I actually know it was a dollar 80 oh fuck off yeah how good's that no that's expensive for a Mr Whippy a dollar 80 what we're talking

50 years ago take that It was close to 40. Did you buy it for everyone? Yeah, Mr. Whippy came down in his horse and cart. And he said, $1.70, would you like a block of land, a kilometer from the city with that? That's the rental Lily lives in now. Thanks to the rent, doll.

Sorry, a dollar 80, you've got your plopped ice cream. Yeah, and I went with my mouth to get the ice cream. And I just like pushed it and it. Does that look up, Charles? that's actually my son's house. Sorry, Charles Disham's a horse and car ice cream. From the 1840s. Yeah, that's pure ice.

I can't believe they actually have that. That's amazing. I bumped the ice cream of the top because it wasn't wed in. It just like the circle just flopped off the top and went on the ground in the dirt. Oh, that is truly so hard. And had he already driven off? Yeah, but also there's a line. I'm like, oh, and I was sort of, yeah, I'd walked a bit of way home and I bumped it off.

And I was like, oh. And then I just like, ate the. cone. Oh, yuck. And then I walked in and mom was like, oh, you've eaten it already. And then I just burst into tears. And I said, Mom, I bumped the ice cream on the ground and I just ate the cone. And I was really, because I was so like all summer, I'm like, well, he's going to come,

he's going to come down one day. Saved up all my money. And then, I don't know if this is an inside. Can I give you a cuddle? That feels really smart. No, you've touched too much of me already. Should we do just this? Should we get the horse picture?

Horse photo. Let me. Okay. And so mum says, like she consoles me. She goes, she just ate the cone. I was like, how lame? She's like, yeah, they suck. And then she goes, how about this?

Let's get in the car and let's drive down to like. You must be the first people. Henry Ford was your neighbor. And he gave you the first car that had been invented. I said, I said, Uncle Henry, Can I borrow that invention you've got in the back shed? And he goes, yeah, I'll take you down there.

Yeah. I actually just read a book about Henry Ford. So I could talk a lot about this, which is. One, you knew him. Yep. Anyway. Uncle H. Yeah, so you got in the car?

And we'll go to an ice cream shop and I'll buy you an ice cream. And I said, I just want the money back. Because you felt like you'd been ripped off. I'd saved up all summer. And so my mom gave me. me a dollar 80 and I just put it in I was like oh maybe another time but you'd been scar by then it's too late yeah I was just sad I was just sad that's real that is really really sad and now if I go to ice cream store I'll always get in a cup I never do a cone yeah

you can't it's too risky what the fuck did you just call me it's too risky after all that any more age jokes no no no no it's too sad it's nice to hear about things stories from the world war though isn't it turbulence around the world and that was happening in our own backyard, you know. I was eight years old. And the following year, I was asked to work in a factory to make bullets to send over to journey. Just send over. Nah, all good.

What was that normal or not? Oh, tap of Vic. Fucking hell. Oh, Western is time out. This is from Mishka. Hi, Mishka. I refuse to mix land and sea animals. Mishka asks, is this normal or nah?

I'll mix mayo with chicken but not tuna because land and sea. shouldn't mingle. That's not how food works. Okay. I was thinking she'd put in a cow in a tank. I was like, what, a cow and a dolphin? Living in harmony. You went to SeaWorld and there's a cow in the tank.

And a chicken next to the fish. I think she means on the plate. Yeah. No, I'm now. Charles, I almost got your torbs. Charles did the, he both looked the same from the back. Can we both do, can everyone? I'm pleased to Photoshop challenge in the Facebook group and put your best land and sea mixture of what Tony thought it was.

Like human life animals. Yeah. Charles made the exact same. Charles made the exact same face as me. So I don't think I was alone there. Thank fucking God. Sorry, can you say what it actually was?

So you can't put tuna. I refuse to mix land and sea animals. Mishka asks this normal. I'll mix mayo with chicken, but not tuna because land and sea shouldn't mingle on the plate. That's not how food works. But tuna and mayo are like a match made in heaven. It's not, they're not land or sea at all.

It's heaven. But also mayo's neither, I thought. Well, I guess mayo is technically from the land because it's from a chicken egg. Oh. Made in a factory. Yeah. Do you reckon? Now, I've got, if you don't like the first two or three of these, you're not going to like the next 10.

Okay. Has she not heard of a surf and turf? Yeah. Has she not heard of a reef and beef? Has she not heard of a land and sand? Has she not heard of a lawn and scorn? Has she not heard of a cow and cod? Cow and cow.

I like that. No steak in lake. Sorry, I take her back. Has she not heard of a lawn and prawn? Yes. That is sick. That's good. Okay, I've got ridden here.

I could keep going. I've written here prawn and prawn Did I mean brawn and prawn? Very good though Has she not heard of horse and seahorse? Nah, sorry. I wouldn't eat either of those two. A seahorse would be spakey.

No, did I say steak and lake? Yeah, I like that one. No cluck and shuck. And then after I give you a suck and fuck. Nothing like a suck and fuck after a cluck and shock. And I have a suck and fuck after a cluck and shock. So he always said that. Yeah, I've always said that.

Name the best night you can. Add a lemon llama bitters and cool a fucking day. I'll tell you what. You've had a clock and a shock and then you get a suck and a fuck and an LLB. What noise was that? The only thing missing would be my favorite meat. Charles? The clock and suck and duck.

It's like a to ducken. A to ducking and a duchin. to suck in before taking it home for it to fucking. Oh my God. Sorry. Charles, the noise you made has sent me into orbit and then you just get the funniest stuff. The grunt? It's like how you laugh when you've got a block nose.

What do you mean? Because you're not, because you can't leave. Yeah, and you end up just go like someone says something funny and you just go, Hi, I'm Amanda from Canberra Australia. I'm Stephanie from Montreal, Canada. This is Taylor from Dallas, Texas, and you're listening to Tony and Ryan. A massive shout out to a few of our champion tarppers. Over at our Patreon, we post a bunch of BTS, some additional content.

We do live streams for our champion tarpers. And if you're watching on YouTube, all the names are rolling across the bottom. They're people from our tapas from our Patreon. So if you want to see your name up there, get on it. Get on. Will there be a vlog from the tennis when we went last week? Is that already up? That was posted last weekend.

Oh, and you can see how Tony wore her accreditation like cool people do. Like a cool girl. That was a personal highlight of that one. I think the height of comedy is someone saying everyone does it and clearly no one does it. Spoiler alert. Everyone's doing it. Ryan ratting me out. I was just trying to fit in.

Is there everyone in the room with us? And they weren't. Spoiler up, they weren't. A few of our champion typers, though. Mike Turner, good on your Mike. Elizabeth Cole, Jenna Tarant, Megan Mayo, not with a tuna. Cartier Whiteman. You wouldn't put that on a prawn and prong.

You won't believe it. Prorn and prawn. Martin, Modro, good on your mutton. Sarah, Shannon, Michelle, Greg Greshek, Brad Heap, Kylie Russell and a happy birthday to Abby King, Tapper Abbey for Monday as well. Oh, good on you, Abby. Tape abbey. Tonight we are after the tennis.

It's the women's semifinals. We're not talking about it. It doesn't matter what we're wearing because it doesn't matter. We'll just see. We'll all just wait and see. It is your last chance, though, as we get to the end of January to enter the January round of podcast away. Round two. You, sorry, I've just like.

Are you all right? No. We think about the prawn and prong. you your plus one are going to be flown from wherever you are in the world to join us in Fiji so it'll be us and a bunch of other tarpers having the best week of our lives hotels all taken care of we'll have a big dinner we'll go and do things we'll some little activities we'll spray our shoes and shit it'll be a fucking great week will you meet mabel and bridge who's to say yet to be decided who's to bloody say

but today's your last chance so go and be a champion tarpa patreon dot com slash tony and ryan And in 25 words or less, what is the first thing you're going to do in Fiji? And we're going to pick the winner on vibes. So that's going to be round two. And there's going to be six more rounds. So you've got plenty of time. You just have to be a champion Tapa when you enter the competition. Yeah, got to be in it to win it.

So get in this round. Very exciting stuff. Fuck yeah. What are we doing? Oh, Charles being a fuckhead. Yep. Yeah. So Ryan doesn't know this yet.

I just know that he's a fuckhead. And then he's not getting a second date. That's fair. Well, so, okay. Safe space because he has, like, it hasn't gone well for Charles. Yeah. And I think you'll be able to tell why in about three minutes. So, um, just two minutes, no.

Charles went on a date. Yay, Charles. Um, they chatted like on, was it on fucking door hinge or something? At Tinder. Yeah, okay. Oh, old school. Yeah. Yeah.

Charles goes, it's not really what I normally use it for. I was like, you're going on a date. How'd you meet her? He's like Tinder, which is, yeah, like, don't normally talk to the girls on there. Okay. What does he do on there? He just chucks and sucks him. Oh, it doesn't usually go on dates.

Gotcha, gotcha, yeah, yeah. No, it's like Tinder is like, hinge is normally where you can talk more, I think. But Tinder is a bit more like, we get it. Yeah. It's a crunchy nut for dating. Reef and beef it. Yeah. Root it and boot it.

Yep. So, Charles has gone on this date. date and he told me about it beforehand. He's like, we're just going to go for a drink tonight. And I was like, amazing. Like, that sounds so fun. The next day, because Charles and our hot girlfriends, we will, I was like, how did the date go?

Like, how was it? And we were together. And he goes, oh, yeah, like, I think it went pretty well. And I was like, oh, yeah. And he goes, we ended up like, we didn't just go for a drink. We ended up, like, staying there and like. Is that? Because there was a lot of chat in the office about like, you're going for a drink,

but it was it like at six or six or six. So what time do you do just a drink? Was the moment where it became like, oh, like, clearly we're going to stay and have dinner. Was that like a moment of like, oh, like, there must be something here. Because if it was nothing, you would have just had your drink and fucked off, right? And that was thing, like, we'd been chatting probably an hour. And then it was like, oh, it was like 7.30. Should we get dinner?

Yeah. Or do you have planes after these kind of thing? So, so far. Yeah. Charles says, at the end of the day, it had gone really well. So I said, oh, can I grab your number? and like text you instead of chatting on Tinder. And he goes, he goes, she goes, oh, yeah, of course.

And Charles goes, and I texted her. And she hasn't texted me back. And so this was like a full probably day after. It was like the afternoon the day after. So it's kind of like you would expect that she's gone home and talked to her girlfriends and been like, met this great guy. God, he's so tall and handsome. And then kind of would have messaged back and been like,

thanks for tonight was great or the next morning even. And it was just like it, great to meet you, like just pretty generic. Very generic. Okay. Okay. And so. Not even a thanks or a, just nothing. Right?

Nothing. Nothing back. What of you. And so I go, all right, well, since we're hot girlfriends, let's break this down. We did what every logical pair of humans would do and go like, play by play, tell me what happened on the day. So Charles starts breaking it all down and I go, okay. Yeah.

And he goes, I got there. I was wearing this. She got there. we were chatting about this, she told me blah, like just like the play-by-play of the day. Then he tells me about the decision to stay for dinner, which you've already asked you out. And they go, you know what?

Yeah, like, let's stay and grab food. And I was like, oh, what did you have? Thinking that there was probably no way that this could have been the undoing. You were at a pub, right? Yeah, just a pub. So I was like, oh, what did you get a chicken parmesan? Steak and chips or something? Well, yeah, two things that are pretty, like, easy to eat.

Oh, Charles. Charles on a first date. First date. Never met this girl in person in real life before. Fish tacos. You didn't say the line at any stage. I love eating fish tacos, did you? I didn't tell you back.

Fish tacos. At a pub. Far from the sea as well in Brunswick. So no fish near by at all. From the Brunswick Ocean. Brunswick, Faw short, down there. And I was like, what? And he goes, yeah, got the fish tacos.

I obviously got it without cheese, kind of cheese. And I was like, no, no, not the problem. What the fuck are you talking about? I was like, what did she order? And he goes, oh, a cheeseburger or something. And I was like... A very normal standard first meat. We're at a pub order.

Yeah, normal. Cheeseburger, great. I need to go on the record and say, there is just no sexy way to eat it. Like, you can't eat it in a way where you're like, this is fine isn't there do you agree

no I just did that now I'm into it yeah well you think about sexy stuff so what I thought we could do is a little test in my drawer

I have three tacos oh so hang on okay hang on a fish taco would definitely have been soft fucking shell yeah I thought

that the crunch would be funnier. It is, but it is so different. Nah, I think it's still good energy. A soft seafood taco, which I assume had like a bit of coal slur and like a, and Tony's pulled out the cheapest beef mince you can find. I spent all day making this. I doubt that.

I've got some salsa as well because you can adjust your own spice level that way. All right. So I thought that all of us could see, do our best sexy taco. I'm eating. Ryan, one for you. The title today on YouTube be called How to Eat a Fish Tarker. How to eat Tony's Tarker. And the thumbnail just be how it's suggested.

Ryan? Thank you. There's yours. I am actually going to need some of that sauce. Yeah, no, that's fine. Let me grab that for you, mate. Charles. Here you go, sir.

No cheese on there for you so you don't shoot yourself. Now, we all like looking down the barrel. Yeah, I think that would probably be accurate. Appropriate. Do you want me to sit there? Thank you. Corner off here. Hang on.

Sorry, everyone. Just doing my waitressing job. Any tap water for the table or anything? There you go. Still sparkling. Tap. Oh, look at that. That looks good.

Do you want some sauce, Charles? Sure. Okay, and then can you take it away because I can't put that back in this drawer? There's going to be a terrible spill. Now, are we doing this to each other or like down the barrel of the camera? I think down the barrel so that anybody watching... Is like, this is what you,

would have seen on only fans yeah i want you to do it so we could role play being on a date i who's going tony you go first should i go first you're going to look down the barrel of that camera and you're going to go can you kind of like ask me what i do for work yeah i just bet yeah um um um so what do you do for work what to be fair to charles he probably didn't try to eat the entire tiger on one by yeah it is but like it's also pretty graphic what do you do for work I destroy fish tacos That's good Okay

So What are you telling me It wasn't that sexy That's what I'm hearing I thought it was All right Oh so What do you do with yourself

Did you go to uni Like what do you do you do Ryan Yeah I've got a business degree And I work for like a small production company Making YouTube stuff Oh great Did you do that? I looked at you, I looked at you and not down the barrel.

No, but. For those no watching, guys, it's licked it all? Ryan, Ryan has licked down the pussy of the taco, is what I would say. I actually just licked all the salt off. So it's quite a spicy lick. Yeah, so Charles, maybe if you've done that. Yeah, so you've gotten into it. It's an absolute mouthful.

It's all cracked up. I've got fucking shit all over me. Shit everywhere. Okay. How is it's a fucking taco though. just take a minute so I can. Yeah. What a good noise.

I thought that the noise would be good for the pod. You know what I mean? I'm thinking about production at all times. This is just now Ryan eating a tarpa. I'm so hungry. Yeah. I'm looking at mine. Do you have any sour cream?

No. So Charles, what do you do for work? Look into your camera, please. All right. Don't do any more chewing right now because I want to hear Charles's. No, because I want to hear Charles as like, I work for like this little podcast Just a little team

Oh that's cool Oh do you all get along with each other pretty well Yeah we do Yeah Any of your boss's dogs Then you're naked? Yeah Only one of them

Not both Yeah Hasn't been trusted with the other one See I'm not eating yet Because we're not having a conversation My we're eating Yes you are Look at us

We're talking We're eating We're eating I can't say Charles That was hell of suggestive Charles Was it? Can you do it again to me That was suggestive Charles

is chewing. Yeah, sorry. It was a bad idea. It's like... Tony normally hates eating on a podcast. I do, but I just thought that this would be funny. And it is. Stop!

Okay, I'm seeing why she didn't call you back. I just, when Charles said to me, like I ate fish tacos on this day, I could not believe that. That is the craziest thing I've ever heard someone say they ordered on a date. because you don't want your hands to be dirty you don't want to have bits all over here like all of these things are what was got like the logistics of a taco

on a date was just like what Charles I don't want to like embarrass this girl and like you know sometimes people match sometimes I don't that's part of it all like all good but I'm just how curious to like call her and be like can you just tell me what you thought of the tacos

because I just I need this loop closed it's a crazy and it's like yeah not to like be like what the fuck No, just like, hey, what did you think about? I know it didn't work out, but can you just tell me what you thought when he ordered, when the second he ordered fish tacos is that when you knew it was done. Does she listen to the pod? No.

Her sister apparently does. Please, message us. Okay. If your sister, Charles liked her. If your sister has recently told you a story about some freak that ate a taco pussy in front of her on a date, message us. Let us know how she thought about it. I think we already know.

Yeah. I think that you just, next one, get them on the next one. Plenty of fish taco in the sea. What a crazy thing to order on a date, don't you reckon? And I regret it afterwards as well, because it was like really messy. Oh, you did regret it. Like, as soon as I ordered it because it was like so packed. Like, there was so much stuff. Would you describe it as too juicy?

But it is. And because often a fish taco, like you said, normally a soft tortilla, but you like squeeze the lime on so they get like wet. Yeah. And sometimes they have that like drizzled in like a spicy me. I'm so sorry about that. I'm really sorry about that. I'm sorry,

Charles. I'm sorry you listening or watching. I'm sorry. This is why you don't have tacos on the first date. What I would say or on a podcast apparently, not the right call, should have taken my own advice. Okay.

So obviously. You're going to finish that? No, I'm not. I already said that. And I don't want you to keep eating it on this podcast because it sounds terrible. You can have it after. Charles, are you going to eat all your yours one?

Yeah. After. After. After. It's cheese and yours. How did we feel about the prop? Did we like the game? I did.

I liked it. Do you like the game? I do like the game. Here we go. No, I actually love it because... Because you've eaten a talk. No, as soon as, because before you were like... Like, there was a bit happening in the kitchen before the effort.

I was just like, pipe cool, everyone. Give me a wide berth. I just need to take care of something. Ryan, if you could not come in the kitchen. And as soon as you said the way, the kitchen, I was like, fuck yeah. So I've confused you early on. Because Charles goes, I can smell it, but I can't put my finger on what I can smell. He's like, all I know is I'm fucking starving.

And I was like, I'm really sorry. You just have to wait. But I'm proud of it. Proud of the prop. Yay. That was great. I've got to you love to see it here. Lay it on me, bitch.

Micah Eastridge, she has started the fucking blog. Oh my God. Hi, Micah. A few years back, I started photography as a hobby. Honestly, it became my entire personality, but I was so insecure and criticals of my photos and my edits. But my photography friend slash mentor encouraged me to put it out there and start charging for photos. Ooh.

Fast forward today, I've now got a little side hustle photography. photography business. Since starting, and again, she only just picked up a camera like a year or so ago. She has done three weddings, dozens of families. And a funeral. Three weddings and a funeral. She was the on-set photographer. She loves you, Grant.

That's funny. Yeah. I keep, what? In my mind, you said three weddings in a funeral and I'm picturing Muriel's wedding. And I'm like, you're terrible. I'm getting mad. Famously Australian film. Australian och out there. I was like, was you crowning that?

Oh my God. I've done three weddings, dozens of families, an adoption finalization party, a maternity session, several newborn baby sessions, business headshots for a company down the road, actor, actress headshots,

and team photos for a local basketball league. How is she doing it as a side hustle? That sounds like a full-time job. I know, right? We'll put a link below to the anchor and light photography page, but good honor. And I had a look like legit. That's amazing.

And isn't photography like, you know those things that like everyone thinks they can do it? Because it seems hell easy. You just pick up the camera and take a fucking shot. But it's not that. But when you get the professional camera and the angles and the day and then you look at the photo and you go, oh, I get that. Yeah. But Micah, well done on starting a fucking blog. Micah has been a tub for a really long time.

I've seen their name pop up for years. Right. That's amazing. Micah Easter, Jay, you said? Yep. Yeah. Oh my God. That's awesome.

Well done. Impressive. Also, adoption, finalisation. Party of I supposed to have had one of those? Yeah, you had one you just don't remember because you're just a little bupah. Should I have one for BJ? Rescue. That's cute.

But we finally signed the papers. Oh, that's all right. I tell you, one of my favorite memes is when the person goes, oh, is that a rescue dog? And the owner goes, no, it's my biological dog. I do tell people all the time that I birth to. And does she believe you? I think so. She's an idiot.

Yeah, so darn. I've got to love to see you here from Katie who, um, shared this in Patreon, uh, via DM. We were chatting about it. Yep. Uh,

for the last two years, I've been trying to go to as many concerts as I can. Fuck yeah. Which I love. Tobbs and I are doing something similar this year. We want to do at least one thing a month. Sick. Um,

and she said, side note, venues here only charged like anywhere from like 20 to $40 for shows. So it's really cheap to go. Yeah. Because like, tickets these days fucking. Yeah. Set your far back.

Yeah. It's crazy. Um, towards the beginning of the year. here, Katie says, I realized I was always standing kind of next to the same group of people. So like the same people that were like going alone kind of end up hovering around the same spot and you like little smile here and there. Like they're all friendly but like never really chatted.

This last Sunday Katie said we all end up standing next to each other again in the line waiting for the concert to start. So we all started talking about like, oh, I've seen you. I saw you at blah last week. And they go, yeah, oh my God, I saw you as well. After the concert, they started a group chat. And so there's about eight of them and a couple people that come out of town that come from out of town like normally drive in in the group chat. And they've like all coordinated what shows they've got tickets to and like, yeah, me, you out the front at five or maybe we could go for a drink before or after or something.

And they've all like become mates from like just kind of. And being like, should we be, we obviously have the same interest in music. Yeah. And going watching bands and same taste in. genres of food and music, sort of. Wow. And Katie's... This when you think you're not getting the tack today.

He says, we're kind of reversed.comrades, but it's a really amazing experience. And now... Reverse.comrades. It's just called being friends in the real life, like in real life. I think they were just trying to use like your lingo. Oh, okay. I appreciate that. Sorry, I'm just offensive about the genres thing and I can still see the tacon.

I don't want to eat it. You're literally like foaming at the mouth. Thanks, Katie. See you left on. But I thought that was really, really cool. Thanks, Katie, for sharing that. I think I just put my foot in my taco. I forgot a dog.

I forgot the plate on the ground, which to be fair, is it a dumb place to put it. Yeah. Where's yours, Charles? Just on the table. Yeah, same. Table. That's all right. Still time.

Can't teach an old dog new treats, isn't it? Especially a dog from the pre-war era. A prehistoric dog. me and my terradactual friend I'm here. You deserve that. You deserve that. Katie,

that is actually fucking cool though. Good on you guys. Send a photo. Are they sent a photo? Oh no, she didn't. Next year. Get a little selfie to the crew.

Yeah, proper in the Facebook group. Tonight we are going to the tennis. You will see Taylor Swift and Travis Kelsey look alike at their women semifinals. Hopefully. It's going to be awesome. And again, it is your last chance to get in the January round for podcast. If you want to come to Fiji with us,

head to our Patreon. Search for Tony and Ryan. We'd love to see you in there. Yeah, that's nice. Good little wrap up. Now, what are we... Yes, you can eat the fucking taco. Love you, bye!

You fucking baby. Thank you. You got that sauce there? Oh yes. Oh, no, Charles put it up there. Oh, no, it's here. Finger jar. Finger jar when you least expected it.

Finger jers, you sat down for a taco. Love you, baby? I waste a lot. Bye. I hope so.