Toni and Ryan - Does Your Boyfriend Have A List About You?

Episode Date: March 10, 2026

Sleep score club - Men with notes - Dad fail :( - love ya!!!!!https://tarpliverecordings.com/Sign up to Patreon Here - www.patreon.com/ToniandRyanFAQ and T&C's PODCASTAWAY - www.toniandryan.com.au/podcastawayVideo for this EP is available on YOUTUBECheck out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toniandryanpodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Women are only just finding out that their boyfriends keep a list about them in their phones. I've got a list of that of you. So you're one of these boys. How many podcasters are you got gone? I'm a fuck boy. Hi, we are Anda and Finn from Sydney, Australia. Hi, I'm Erin from Columbus, Ohio, USA. I'm McKenna from Cairns.

And I approve this podcast. Welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast. My name is Ryan. This is Dr. Author bestselling Dr. Dr. Author, Tony Lodge. Hello. And there's a hero in the room. here today.

And when a hero comes along. I was listening to the Shits and Gigs podcast. And they were bragging about being in the high 80s for their sleep score. Like they were so pumped about being in the high 80s. I believe they used the term doing numbers. Yeah. Did someone in this room do 100 the other week? Charles.

Charles did hit it recently, but we're both in the 100 club. I didn't realize, because I'm not a sleep score track. But the way these guys were talking on shits and gigs talking about how good it is to be in the high 80s, knowing that I was sharing a room with the triple digit club over here. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow.

Wow. Congratulations you too. And congratulations to anyone that's had a great sleep recently because get them numbers. I don't think that mine's that accurate though. Take the wind, sweetheart. No, because I just do it. I use it for the alarm in the morning. Gotcha.

Because if you do it on your watch, it vibrates on your wrist rather than making noise. Haptic technology. Yes, it is. I think it's haptic, but yes. I'm from Australia. Sorry. That's how we pronounce it here. The haplantic.

And when I wake up to noise in the morning, I find it really, like, stressful. Yeah. So like the little like zip, zip on my wrist is perfect and it happens to track it at the same time. So I'm not using as good an app. I don't think as you, Charles, but like when I keep. When I've used the hit the 100, you wake up, you feel like you could fucking lift a car. It's funny you say that the audio stresses you were out. Same.

But is that the point of the alarm? Because when we had to get up early the other week, I had this like really calm thing on and I woke up two hours later. Yeah. Because it goes, do-da-da-da-da-well-up soft. And I go, thanks, bud. Pop. Yeah. And then just keeps, maybe I need the stress.

Well, I just don't. I mean, I don't like it, but do I need it? But I just feel like it jolts me awake and I don't like... Yeah, it just puts me off. And then when I started doing that on my wrist, because it just kind of like taps on your wrist, and it's not noise. And it's actually great if I'm waking up really early

because it doesn't wake Torbs up or Pippa. Maybe that is why I'm... And you're the most beautiful person I know. One of the many reasons that could be. one of them crazy news ladies strap in

strap on me am I am I one of the ladies women are only just finding out that their boyfriends keep a likes and dislikes list on their phones Torbs doesn't

like I can say with a million percent certainty that there's no way he does do you mean about their partners yep nah women are only just finding out that their boyfriends keep a likes and dislikes list about them in their phones. A girl found out her boyfriend was keeping tabs and asked, so she said to the girls like,

oh, my boyfriend does this thing. Can you, when you all go home, go and ask your partner? And then they like reconvened. And most of them did. What? And so this girl jumps on TikTok and goes, this is crazy. My boyfriend's doing this. I asked the girls to check with their boys. They're all doing. And everyone in the comments was like, I'll go ask my boyfriend. And then everyone's like, I never knew. And then here he does. Here it is.

So is it like, oh, love that she's always early, hate that she talks during a film. Like that kind of thing? I thought it was like about them, but it's more like she likes her flat whites with oat milk. Talks does have that. She supports the Hawthorn Hawks. She doesn't like KFC, more of a grilled girl. She likes fruit and nuts, but not fruit and nut chocolate. But, you know, like, so that's all things about me.

Did you write that about me? You love fruit and nut chocolate? No, I don't. No, Black Forest is my favorite. With the little crispses in it. Isn't that fruit? The Black Forest. Have you been in a Black Forest?

The Black Forest cake, I think, is like proper cherries and stuff. But Black Forest chocolate, it's like, it sounds healthy, but it's fucked. So it's milk chocolate. Let me describe it. It's chocolate, right? Nah, so it's chocolate. like dairy milk and then it's got the little

raspberry jubes in it and little bits of chocolate cookie that's the black, it's amazing. It's my favourite chocolate. It's so good. So, I don't like fruit and nut chocolate.

Because you're a fucking adult. Well, because I'm not 75. Yeah, maybe that's it. I just don't know. I understood it. It's like old gold.

Like that's for dads. I think old gold and old spice. Although Torbs is an old spice. Taubs does an old spice. I like old spice. Which is quite, um, Like, feels a bit like, fancy.

Yeah. How many girls are these guys dating for them to need to keep a list is my question. Because, but like when you're single and you're like going on dates and you're meeting people, it's like, there's a lot to remember. And wouldn't it be nice when you go and get a coffee that they like remembered your order? Totally. And then when I thought about, first I was like, this sounds a bit fucked. And then I was like, oh, no, they're like putting in a bit of effort. And that's effort.

Yeah. I thought you meant that it was like, oh. likes, ass, dislike personality. Yeah, face. If I had to choose a couple of me. Like, you know that? It's like a really early episode of Friends when Ross is making like a pros and cons list. And Rachel's, one of Rachel's cons is like chubby ankles.

And she's like, are you kidding me? Like what the fuck? But no, I think that this is sweet. Like, or like if you keep a list about like, oh, things someone's mentioned because you're going to buy them that as a gift. Exactly. Things like that. Like I've got a list of that of you. like artists you've mentioned you like and things like that.

Yeah. So you're one of these boys. How many podcasters are you got going? I'm a fuck boy. I always wanted to be a fuck boy. Did you? Yeah. Torbs has a list.

Probably you say Toad's one. Torbs has a note in his phone and it just is called Subway and it's exactly what I get from Subway every time. That's beautiful. Yeah. And I can't even remember it because he always gets it. Just a passenger princess. Yeah.

Subway turns up made by an artist who went to a university. Golden Retriever Golden Retriever So I have spoken to your fiancé Torbs And I said If you could only pick two likes And two dislikes What would they be?

And he has answered So Tony Lodge What do you think his likes were? As in like what's he written down that Tony likes? The subway thing I reckon and um like if you had to write two things Tony likes yeah what is what would you write probably subway that my subway order and then probably like diet coke's too obvious like

like what would she order like diet coke's too obvious i hear what you're saying yeah i'd step back from the purchasing and just think there's a whole beautiful world what's two things that because torbs didn't have a specific list and i said okay Okay. If you were to just say two things that Tony likes and two things that you don't like. And he said, here's my answer. Okay. Sandwiches.

Yep. And swimming. So they're the two. Is that where you're locking in? I guess so. Torp said if I had to choose two likes for Tony, it would be sandwiches and being in a body of water. I've got it. You're fucking me.

Nah. I'll show you that I've got these next dances. But yeah, it's written right here. Love him so much. That's amazing. Yep. Two dislikes. I hate so much.

Um, mint. And being like, fuck. Fuck off. Get, get fucked. Get fully fucked. Get fully fucked.

Get fully fucked. Fucked in the house. Ask. Show me. Oh, Charles is. Fucking Giles face. Why don't

unlock this iPad? It is because I was looking at the notes as well. Did you? Okay. Okay. Okay. That's the craziest thing that's ever happened. Did you think I was going to get that?

Well, I know that you like those things and dislike those things. It's just a matter of, are they the two you're going to pick? Because like you said. You hate a lot of stuff. And I love a lot of stuff. You should marry him. We're getting married. How sick is that?

That is so sick. Can I share what you shared in Patreon? Like just say out loud what you put in the group chat the other week? The photo. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Tony has been trying on wedding dresses and giving some like, what do we think of this one, ladies? Yeah.

And putting them in the group chat in Patreon. In the champion type of group chat. And I'll tell you what, if you are having a bad day. Lodged one of those in because isn't anywhere, everyone is so gassed up and excited. The one that, so I tried on five at one place and found the one. In those five, I found the one. And the one that I liked the least is the one that I, because I was like, I'm definitely not going to pick this one.

And people were like, oh, well, that's the one that you should pick. And I was like, well, you should say the one I did pick. Well, it's not a competition. Yeah. No, but like, if you think I look good in that, wait until you come when I show you the other one. You know what? And I don't want to poo-poo Georgi unkatuah. I don't want to poo-poo the importance of wedding dresses.

But it's the girl in the dress that looks beautiful. Stop it. Now, how's that white diet going? I'm ready for filling up. This is Anda and this is Finn. We're from Sydney, Australia. I'm Erin from Columbus, Ohio, USA. I'm McKinna from Cairns.

And you're listening to Tony Ryan. A massive shout out to a few of our champion tables over at our patron. Sorry, I'm just, I'm on cloud nine. You're so in love. Yeah, I am. Ali Booth, good on your Ali. Susanna Sasassa. Susanna Sasassa.

La la la la la. Bryce McCai, good on your Bryce. Apricity. Chloe Carissa. Hey, I love you. I really appreciate you coming in today. Can I apprecycy on that dude? You are like that.

Charles, yeah, Lee Adam, good on you, Lee, Rebecca R. Remember I used to live out in the country and now I've moved into the Aprici city? That's very good. Rebecca R, good on you, Rebecca. Seren Ray, good on you, Seren, Carissa Kiefman, Chelsea Seacourt and Anna Marie Black. Thank you very much for being part of the Patreon. Being a Chamon type, we can't do it without you. Yep, we are doing some live shows.

So if you're in the Apric City of Riga in Latvia, Sunday the 22nd of March. So I do it for all of them or we get it. Not all of them. We'll be the biggest appreached city of Sweden, which is Stockholm, Friday, March 27th. And we'll be in the appreach city of Dublin in Ireland on the 15th of May, which is the week before Tony's Hens.

And the website, Charles, is tarpa live recordings.com. And you can go and check that out right now. And of course, the Hens Night is a one-off spectacular. They are like a live recording of the show. But it'll be great to see you. And I know that Taupers love to. meet each other as well. So it'll be a really good time.

Get a month to step. Yeah. Now, I just need to like set this up with a warning. Okay. Because something like kind of, like I ended up having a bit of a shit day the other day. Oh. But the thing that I ran into is quite sad. But I think the urge to laugh is because I've turned up to that. So if you do feel the urge to laugh, I just want to let you know that it's okay.

Safe face. No, because you're actually laughing at me. and not what happened. Okay. You're laughing at the fact that I went over. Like, yeah. No,

you know what? I appreciate the set up. Because it feels like you're not supposed to laugh, but it's sort of, it's fucked. Okay. Oh, God.

Okay. And warning I might cry because I had a, I had a tough day. I had a tough day. So, um, it was on the weekend. So Mabel and I love swimming.

Yes. We try to swim most days and we hate me. Like swimming. Honestly, like, like, favorite thing in the world for the last few years, going for a swim with my daughter.

And Mades also, like, when we're away, because we'll FaceTime, Mabel, like at bedtime or whatever, and she'll go and you always go like, oh, dad will be home tomorrow. Like, we'll go for a swim. And she's like, yeah, like, it's her faith. She loves it.

So we like going to the river. We go and going to the beach. If we stayed at the, if we go, when we went on holidays, it's like, it doesn't even matter where we are. We're just in the pool. Yeah. And so on a Saturday morning,

we actually go to swimming lessons. Sure. And it's just the two of us. We go and have swimming lessons and then we go and have coffee. And so she's like, oh, cool. So we go to the cafe and she's, you know,

got wet hair and we'll get a baby chino on a little marshmallow. And it's like, daddy daughter, Saturday morning is like just the two of us. And that's quite nice, eh, because it's like something good for her to like, because she's learning.

Yeah. But also you get the day to get you can have a cruisy morning. Yeah. It's two of us. It gives bridge a bit of a chop out on a Saturday morning. It's great. But as anyone knows, swimming's like really tiring.

Oh, fuck yeah. Yeah, and in swimming lessons, it's like they're concentrating, they're learning stuff, they're physically swimming. So pretty tired and I forgot her dummy. And so parents will go through this phase in different times. But when she's tired and we get in the car, like, the car's like, oh, we're trying not to do too much dummy, but in the car.

Yeah. And I've. Because is it like a, and as a non-parent, is it kind of like with the dummy or pacifier for the Americans, it's like. you try and phase it out a little bit. And so now we're kind of like, it's only for sleeping. Got you. And in the car is kind of the last bit of the phase, I guess.

Or if she's in a bad mood. Because it's comfort, right? It's so comfort. Yeah. And we sometimes if we're a bit grumpy, we go, well, let's do a reset. Let's lay in bed for five minutes. Have the dummy in and we can just have a breather. And then a few minutes and we're back.

She is very self-aware with that when she goes, I think I just need to be on my own for a bit. Like she'll take herself to bed for a minute. We've used the term, do you need a reset? until a lot. It's like, we'll go start again. And isn't that just, I wish a few times I could be in my own adult life to just sometimes go, hey, Ryan, maybe you just need a little reset, bud. And wouldn't, isn't it funny how like, for maids, you go, like, that's self-care.

But if you thought to say that yourself, you'd be like, oh, like, grow up. Yeah, I know. Like, I would never do it for myself. But if you said you needed that, I'd be like, bitch, tell me what you need. And maybe we should all take away that a reset's a really healthy thing at any age. So we're tired from swimming. We're in the car. Are you in the pool with her?

when she's doing or are you just watching uh this one just watching but often i'll be in because she's gone up a level a yeah but then on like that if that's saturday on a sunday we'll go to the pool and i'll do like i'll teach her and we'll go and do stuff and i'm watching youtube videos about how to like teach her and stuff but i've forgotten her dummy and i just know that after a big swim and we've gone to a thing and she needs a reset and i'm just going fuck you know so she's you're just like i'm so sorry babe i've forgotten it and when a toddler where is it and i i think it's a Like, and I've just, I've fucked up. And, you know, you try so hard to, to be a good dad and he's, oh, fuck, I've, I've let you down.

I forgot that one thing. Yeah. Yeah. And obviously, any parent will know the only thing you really want in life is your kid to be happy and healthy and you're just like, I know, I know that's my fault. I can see it. Yeah. I'm like, I'm so sorry.

So I'm just like, I'm a bit down. I'm like, I feel like I've let her down. So we're driving and she's a bit, you know, agitated and whatever. And I'm like, fuck. I would just do anything to like write this right now yeah I'll just get her in a good mood or do something

and I'm driving along and I look out into the park and I saw an echidna in the park which I think overseas there are is that a porcupine what do they call? They're different things but yeah

those spiky little guys yeah so they're like Australian yeah so at Hillsville Sanctuary they're the coolest dudes because they're just like cruise around they got these spiky thing. They wobble. They wobble. They're like little gangsters. And we love seeing the echidna.

So, because we've got to, we'll go to the zoo like the other day. We'll chat in about echidna. I'm like, cool. And so I saw this echidna in the park. And you know, often see them like in the wild. No. But we live in like a kind of bushy area. And I was like, oh. So I stopped that like, like, did a U-turn, went back, stopped the car. And I was like, hey, mate, let's go. And I was like, fuck yeah. Like, I was literally, Girlfriend. Look at this thing where, yeah. But I've also like kind of looked to the heaven.

a bit and gone, I would do anything to cheer my daughter up. And it's like the universe is delivered. My mum did it. Yeah, thanks Liz. She said the echidna. Thanks Liz for the echidna, you good bitch. So then... Actually, maybe I don't want her to take a bit.

In fact, you don't know where this is going on. Yeah. Yeah. Foreshadowing. I reckon leave Liz out of this. Okay. So I'm like, here we fucking go. And is maids like, oh my God, where is it? It's an echidna and she goes, oh, like at the zoo.

I go, yeah, but there's one here. And like, so, we love them. And they're cool. And I was like, thank you, universe. Yeah. So I go around to get her out of the car, unclipper, like, pick her up, walk her down there. And there's like, it's not moving. And like, this is the bit where you're allowed to laugh a little bit, but it's fucked.

And there's ants, like hanging about and flies. And it's like, it's dead. Yeah. And. Oh. Oh. Ha. Ha!

Yeah. And this is the fix. this is the fix and again no honey that's sleepy I just want to remind people that you can laugh at the situation and doesn't mean you're laughing at a fucking dead of kid now no because that's obviously not funny but whoa yeah so you've just got Mabel gassed up in the car

about this little wobbly dude you're about to see and she goes oh maybe oh okay maybe I'll be in a better and then so I drag it down there and I go and I've just seen the flies and the ants and just gone oh my god Ryan And I said to Mabel, I go, oh, I think he's sleeping. Classic. You go.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And she goes, I think he's dead. Fragal. I didn't even really know if she knows what dead means or what is death. Like, we haven't had that chat. She's two years old. Yeah. But she goes.

Hey, she's almost three. She's almost right. But she just goes, I think he's dead. Just like. Yeah, and I went, well, I'm not going to lie to you. He kind of looks like that, doesn't he? Like, oh, well, come on. And then she goes, oh, I don't want him to.

And like, she got really upset. Oh. And I'm like, I've forgotten your dummy. And I've stuffed up today. And I've. And now I've shown you a dead version of your favourite. I've done a U-turn, done quite a creative park. to get to the side of the road where the echidna was dragged you down here to show off

road kill a dead echidna on the side of the road and then mabel was so sad and like what happened like what can he can you fix him like can we like we'll take it because you know how we're playing hospitals at the moment she's like she's like and i was like oh i don't think so and then she like she cried and it was a bit sad and she was all right and she was all And then she's like, where's my dummy? I'm like, it's back at the house. We'd be there by now if I didn't fucking stop. You know, and I just, you know, we, we share the winds of our parenting journey.

And I just thought today is not that day for me. And that's why I'm a bit flat at the moment. Because I've, as much as I was like, Tony will piss laughing at this. I was like, that is, you know, sometimes it's just not your day. Absolutely. Yeah. But also, like, fuck, there are people doing a lot. worse for getting a dummy than the echidna no oh i'd say he's doing quite bad not the echidna but like

he's up there with liz just liz and the echidna in heaven i hope she's got less ants on her than he does the last time i saw her she didn't have any that's nice that's a nice memory yeah but there i think he's dead like you're i think it's good to let yourself be bummed about that. I get it. But like, I really try to be the best dad that I can. And you are.

You really are. She loves you so much and you care about her so much. You know how people know that you care is because you give a fuck. I do give a fuck. You cared that she didn't have her dummy and you felt really bad. That's right. And you know, I have that awful saying of like the,

that you try to do the right thing and it just backfires and make it even. No good deed goes on. I'm punished. Yeah. But like, fuck. Try to bring a girl back and I've just made it so much worse. But a shitty person doesn't know they're a shitty person because they just don't give a fuck. A good person wants to.

And I know I'm a shitty person. No, but a good person wants to be a good person. That's why they hold themselves to a higher standard. Yeah. Well, sorry to my little girl. Where are we at on a dummy for the car? He's still dead. Oh.

Well, we're trying to do a backup. No. We're trying to phase it out. And are we feeling space not. solutions based anyway. Oh, I mean, solution is if I can bring it. Like,

I tried. Tony. No, it's just like, I forgot it. Yeah. And we went through a phase, like,

I forgot a few spare ones. And if we're trying to phase it out, we can't just have these dummies lying around everywhere. It's like, no, there's one. And if you put it somewhere, you got to remember because,

you know, and we're kind of like. Oh, so it's Mabel's fault. Mm. Oh, she should have picked it up. We're hoping it gets lost or she's decided.

Yeah. Or she's starting to like. She just doesn't ask again and you don't bring it up. Yeah. And so, but as soon as she was like after swimming, like, you know, we're all tired and just go, oh, sweetheart. I'm like that too. Yeah.

Like you get grumpy after, you know, a big morning. Are you bit grumpy? No, I'm okay. I'll show you something in the park. Might bring you. I just, I can't believe the, I thought you were going to say that you drove down there and it was gone. Like it had wobbled off and like, whatever.

I wish it had. It was the opposite. It wasn't had mumbled anywhere. I was like surprisingly still. And that you would have been like, Oh my God, Mabes, did you see that echidna? And you get down there, it's not there. And she's like, well, you fucking promise me an echidna.

Well, she got an echidna. She did get, if there is an upside, she did get to see one right up close. And you know what, echidna? I hardly know her. Thanks for that. I needed that. And I did say to you, I want a really great you love to see it to pump me up because it's not my day. Yep.

Yeah, yeah. I've got something here from Tapa Connor. Connor. I'm back. Connor salt. Oh, where's Connor Pippa? I have a fun little thing to share with you. Does it live in the drain?

Is he a connoisseur? Or is he just really good at it and he's a connoisseur? It's like another play on words. Gotcha. Yeah. Because being a connoisseur means that you're like an expert. Wish I had to brought it up. No, but you said it in like, is he a drain because he's a conno sewer.

So it's like a double play on words. We're both right. I have a little fun thing to share. I'm here for you. Thank you. Okay. I have a little fun thing to share with you that has to do with starting the blog. I recently started my film degree after dropping out of a science degree in 2024 and have become really interested in cameras. Started out mainly writing and directing as his interest but has gotten like into like the tech side of things.

At the start of the year before my ass messer started for uni, I bought myself a new camera to try and get better at photography. And I've since started an Instagram for it. We've had a lot of photography start the blogs. recently I love it. Solly getting better and want to share my art and my improvements with the world one day one step at a time. And if you want to check it out in the meantime, my account is in dot outpoint. So we can pop the thing in their show notes, whatever.

But good on you, Connor. Did Connor mention the type of camera? Charles is interested. No, but you could message him at in dot outpoint on Instagram. I'll message him. Because we know someone who's into cameras as well. And you know Charles's favorite kind? What?

Expensive ones. Well, I did know that. Yeah. I did know that part. My love to see it, which has been a bit of a theme over the last few weeks. And our Facebook group's been popping off. My DMs have been popping off. I know your DMs probably been popping up.

Lemon, lime and bitters has hit McDonald's. Yeah, huge. Huge news. Like a sign from above, like the Echidna. Well, you got one. And I got, and... Is it numbies? There's something that it hits right about the Macca's cup with ice.

It is. Just a big old cup of it. Yep. With the lemon lime and bitters poured in. It's really cold because the ice, it's swishing. You drink it through a straw. And it's really bubbly. Yeah.

And it just, I mean, I know lemon lime and bitters at Mackers is a great meme in itself and whatever. But to actually taste the nectar of the gods. The nectar of the gods. Really, really will pump you up. And because we've been chatting about it, you're with me the other day. I was like, I'm going to actually order it. And doesn't that just take an edge of it? with a hard hot day.

So now all they've got to do is add Diet Coke back to the menu and we'll be right as right as right. Yeah, I mean, they're not having, they're not perfect yet. Yeah. But hey, life is a journey. LLB is pretty close though. You'd settle for an LLB. Yeah.

Oh, settle. You'd enjoy an LLB. When they go, oh, sorry, we don't have diet Coke. Would you like Coke Zero? If you're a waiter or a barman or a fucking legend of McDonald's, here's the new sentence you should use. I'm so sorry. we don't have Diet Coke.

Would you like a lemon, lime and bitters? One. If people responded to me with that when I asked for a Diet Coke, I'd say yes every time. That's my gift to you today. That is, that's good. I like that.

See, look at you, Perkin. I'm back. I love it. I try my best. No, you do. And you're amazing. Thank you. I love you.

I'm obsessed with you. I love you so much. Say whatever you want to assist with you. Yeah, I've started telling my wife that I'm obsessed with her. Yeah. And she likes it. That's sweet. Yeah.

It's nice to feel in love. Yeah. Although sometimes it's like a fine line. So bridge gets out of the shower. She wasn't wearing any clothes. And I just went, I'm obsessed with you. And she just went and didn't really know what to do with that information. Yeah.

It's like a fine line. Yeah. The timing is important. Yeah. And she's like, when you say that next, my eyes were up here. And I was like, sorry. I was distracted. No.

All right, chat to you tomorrow. Love you, bye.