Toni and Ryan - Foam Pit VS Toni

Episode Date: August 4, 2022

Normal or nah - taking your shoes off on a plane.... NAH. Also I got stuck in a very... humbling situation. Love ya! Toni x Check out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

So I messaged Nick to arrange a time for approval. And he goes, oh, I said, between these two times, what suits better? He goes, can you call the later one? I should be out of jail by then. So I don't know if A, he was joking. B, maybe he works in a prison. Or C, are we thinking he's literally just been released from the big house? I don't know.

Because it's email. There's no tone or context. He goes, yep, maybe call a bit later. I'll be out of jail. So let's call him. Well, this is in my wheelhouse because I've been watching Wentworth. Oh, mate, you guys will be. So this will be easy.

Great, great, great. So it's Nick. Maybe the screws are onto him. Is that a bad thing? That's the guards. The wardens and stuff. Maybe he's still in there. Enjoy your last meal.

Hello? You are receiving a phone call from the county jail. The people calling you are Tony and... Ryan. Please let us know if you... What the hell? What the fuck? What the fuck? Calling you, Tony and... Ryan. Please let us know if you... Oh, they're coming. What the hell? What the fuck?

What the fuck? Can you explain what's going on? Nick, blink twice if you need legal help. I can't see you because we're on the phone. Oh, fuck. Perfect timing if you ask me. It was an ad. What's going on? Can you please explain to us?

So you've said, hang on. You said to me in an email. You've got a call later because I'm in jail and it sounds like we're hearing it in reverse that you're already in jail. Prison break. Perfect mission. I'm trying to drive into the jail, yeah. You're self-surrendering.

No. So I work in reintegration services. So I actually help people who are coming out of jail, you know, join the community and feel safe. Oh, cool. Yeah, awesome. Yeah. Yeah, absolutely.

Well, good on you, man, and that does put my mind at ease because, to be honest, when I got that email, I was like, okay, there's a few options that this could be. Yeah. Yeah, sure. I really had to fuck with you. Yeah, well, it worked. No, I felt prepared because I've been watching Wentworth.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, so I know all about prison. Absolutely. It's exactly like in the movies. I was going to say, is that what it's actually like? No. Oh. Yeah, that's right.

That's a letdown, actually. It's a bit disappointing. It's actually not as scary as you think either. I remember going into my first prison. I was like, oh, like, is this it? Oh, letdown. Yeah, it was very, very underwhelming. Well, next time just lie to Tony next time.

Actually, no, it was exactly like the movie. Wow. Did you get shivved? Absolutely, yeah. Send me a picture of that scar. Would you approve the podcast? I will absolutely approve the podcast. Yay!

Hey, it's Nick from Perth and I and Ryan podcast. Welcome. My name is Ryan, vice captain of the ship. Tony Lodge, our queen, is here. Hi. Have you recovered from yesterday's audio queen edition that, to quote you, destroyed my throat? Yeah. A lot of tea.

A lot of green tea. Good, good. It's really hard because I forget that screaming is actually so hard on the throat. You forget that, do you? Because I just get so into it and I just do it and then I'm like, why have I done this? Yeah.

Because I just commit so hard to everything that I do. No, but please. Yeah. On behalf of the Tafers, please continue. Please continue. We thank you for your service. I actually really appreciate that. You know when sometimes you feel undervalued?

Do you feel undervalued? Sometimes. What did I say to you this morning before I hit the record? That you'd finger my arsehole. Actually, yeah, that's really nice. Yeah, don't worry. I didn't think you were going to repeat it. That's what I said. So he's like, do I look good today? And I was like, I'd finger your arsehole. Actually, yeah, that's really nice. Yeah, don't worry. I didn't think you were going to repeat it. That's what I said.

So he's like, do I look good today? I was like, oh, I'd finger your arsehole. She goes, oh, thank you. I needed that. Yeah, I did. I did need that. Sometimes we do need that. It's a pleasure and an honour.

The pleasure's all mine. Or mine, apparently so. Coming up, though, as much as you hear these crass things about Tony Lodge, I reckon when you hear what happened to Tony Lodge, there might be, I reckon someone might cry for you. It's humbling. Yeah. Sit down and be humble.

Tony will be humble in this episode. Yeah, call me Kendrick Lamar because I'm sitting down and I'm being humble. All right, that's coming up soon. First of all, normal or nah? So basically normal or nah is when. I wonder if people think that's funny because that fucking. Oh, I fucking love it because the look on your face. I just don't know why it makes you so angry.

Just to bring people up to speed. I believe that normal or nah is quite self-explanatory. Yeah. But. Normal or nah. But I think that it's nice to bring people up to speed if this is the first time listening. Just like at the end of every episode you go, oh, at the end of every episode we do a thing you love to see.

People get it. Okay, can you explain normal or nah? So normal or nah, we take a phrase and we go, is this normal or is this nah? It's not a good explanation of what it is. What is? Normal or nah? Charging your friends for drinks when they come over to your house.

Fucking nah. Thank you. Absolutely the fuck not. Absolutely. Sarah Boz lobbed this into the group and says, do you, after a friend comes around for a beers, send them a Venmo request for the total amount when they leave? There's 550 comments in the Tony and Ryan Facebook group.

548 said nah. Kari Cantu said I'm all about this. And so I removed her from the group. I don't think it's like, sorry, where do you sit? Are you nah? Absolutely nah. I agree that maybe if, say, if I always came to your place for a few beers and you never came to mine,

then I would maybe bring some beers and contribute. See, that's what I think the difference is. It's having the social politeness and the etiquette of being like, oh, we'll bring beers with us. The same way that if you take beers to someone's house, you don't pick them up and take them. You leave them? Yeah, you leave them there unless the person goes,

we actually won't drink them, take them. The thing, because I'm not a big drinker or something, not from Friday I was. If I take a six-pack, I'll have like one beer. Yeah. And then I'm like, oh, I'm just going to leave five in the fridge. Yeah. Or if you take beers to somebody's house and then you drink all their spirits.

Oh, man, I brought these Toohey's Red, the cheapest beer ever. Oh, no. I love an old-fashioned. I will go to the top shelf. Yeah. I'll just keep the beers, though. Do you have any eggs? Because I'd love a whiskey sour.

Can you explain what happened? Oh, so my friend Sam, who I love very, very, very, very much. He needs to fucking lift on this, though. He's a very good friend. And whenever he comes, he always brings snacks and wine. So he's a very good guest. But I was like, because always brings snacks and wine. So he's a very good guest. But I was like, because we have like a bar cart in our house. Yeah, it's cool.

And it's always fully stocked because my parents always had a bar in their house, so I guess I have like childhood trauma or something. I like to have guests. Love to be the host. He came over one night and it was kind of around the end of the night and I was like, did you want to – we'd finished the red wine. I was like, did you want to insert? We'd finished the red wine. I was like, did you want a cocktail? Because I've got gin, I've got whatever.

He's like, I'd love a whiskey sour. I know that you offered a cocktail, but I cannot believe he asked for that in your house. It's like. It's hard to make. It is hard to make. And it needs lots of ingredients. And because I'm a people pleaser, I was like, oh, I'll figure it out. And I looked at the

fucking recipe and I actually was like, Sam, no, I'm not. Did you? Yeah, I said no. I was like, I'm not making that. I'm proud of you because you're not a say no girl. You are a people pleaser. Yeah, and I like to be a good host. Separate the egg whites from the, that's,

I'm not about that. I've already had half a bottle of wine with Sam. I can't keep my hands straight. And it was like a Tuesday night. Like it was like he'd come over for dinner on like a school night. We were like having dinner and drinks. Was it an empty offer? It absolutely wasn't an empty offer. Oh, gin and tonic?

Great. I'll pour a bit of gin in. I'll pour a bit of tonic in. Here you go, bud. Or even if he was like, oh, what do you have? Great question. Because then I would be like, oh, I can very easily make you an espresso martini. I can, you know, there's things that I can easily do that I've done before

that wouldn't be a problem. And even if he said that, that gives you the chance to say, because you know how cocktails you can make a few at once. You go, oh, why don't I make a big margarita and I'll pour us all a thing. Yes. Yeah, yeah. So there would have been a few things. I'll get an egg white with the maker's mark.

A little bit less of the egg white, but make sure you extra stir this and with a garnish of dried orange, which you've obviously been drying all afternoon, in case I haven't ordered this. Yeah, the oven's been on for eight hours on 60 degrees. But, yeah, so, you know. Would you like your orange dehydrated or sun-dried? Because there's some out the back.

I hope that John the Cat hasn't gotten to them. John Galloway, who I love in our Facebook group, by the way, he said, if you take your own drinks, do they charge corkage? That's fucking hilarious. Barb Irwin says, what kind of fuckery is that? Yeah. It's a definite nah. First drinks, soon they'll be charging for toilet paper

when you go to the bathroom. Imagine what they'd charge for a towel. That's funny. I think that back in the day. $60 is the answer, by the way. Oh, great. Because you didn't cut my hair. Is that what happens in a hotel?

Like if you shit on a towel in a hotel, you know, the soiling fee? Is there a soiling fee? Yeah. I've never even heard that term before. Yeah, yeah. So a friend of mine. That's surprising for me because I have soiled a lot of things in a lot of hotels.

Yes. Yeah, a friend of mine, she once got a soiling fee in a hotel for the sheets because she messed the sheets up a bit. Anyway, I think that back in the day when we were all students, it would be like, oh, I'll put on the drinks. Can you bring food? We'll do like a potluck or something. I feel like that's the natural way of like figuring out

who owes each other what. And we ask when we go to each other's house, like you'll make me a coffee at your place and then after dinner I'll have a beer. But then next time you're at my place, I'll make you a coffee. And it kind of just evens itself out. But it's also the same as if we go out for lunch. I'll be like, oh, I'll grab it or you grab it or whatever because it just like evens itself out. But it's also the same as if we go out for lunch. I'll be like, oh, I'll grab it or you grab it or whatever

because it just like evens itself out. I think probably, yeah. That's probably my turn. But, you know, like I think that's fine. But I think that if you do want to be like. Budget conscious? Yes. If you want to be like, actually, like I'm always putting on the drinks,

but I think the Venmo request is really passive aggressive. It is, isn't it? When I'd rather you actually just be like, bro, like, you come over here all the time, like... Do you mind chipping in? Exactly. And most people would go, oh, of course. Yeah, because they probably just wouldn't realise.

But I think, yeah, the money request is just, like, so bitchy, don't you think? I'm going to send you a PayPal request for something really small. Did you have something I might chew with the other day? PayPal request, 60 cents. Yeah, I dropped you off on my scooter. That's 50 cents worth of power. I have been riding your scooter, by the way.

Yeah, mine's fucked. I've got to take it to the thing. Take it to the scooter shop. This is from Rhiannon Shoemaker. Normal or nah? Giving both of your boobs an individual name. Nah. Nah?

I'm not a namer. Not a namer? You know how people, like, name their cars or... Name their private parts? Yeah, I'm not a namer. Not a namer? You know how people, like, name their cars or... Name their private parts? Yeah, I'm not a namer. It's too cute. It's not for me. A lot of people said nah, but Stephanie said normal.

Mine are Betty and Veronica, just like the twins, B and V. Maybe come as a team, they look alike, but they have their own personalities. And isn't that from Archie Comics? It must be, yeah. Are you normal? For me, it's a nah. Yeah, I can't imagine you.

I'm also not a namer. No. Shannon says I've got Thelma and Louise, which is, I say cute, but Tony's just given the biggest eye roll since Tina Fey in 30 Rays. I find naming stuff just like a bit cringe. But like if you think it's fun, then like live your best life. It's enough for me, but it's normal for most people, I think. Rhys, I call one Biggie and the other one Smalls because one is definitely bigger than

the other. And then when they both come out, Biggie Smalls in the house. I like that. My right boob is way nicer than my left boob. Really? My left one's bigger, but my right one's nicer. Oh, interesting. Yeah.

I'll write that down. Yeah. It's quality, not quantity. And a lot of people just said I just refer to them as the girls. Oh, the girls are out. You know when a girl, if they have like a big cleavage. I know. Oh, the girls are out tonight.

I hate it. The way I said that reminded me that's a very bogan thing to say. I just, if somebody said that to me, I'd be like, okay, I'm actually like not, I'm not for your consumption. Like don't say that to me. Like that would make me really uncomfortable. I'm not for your consumption. Yeah.

That's how I like psych myself up if I'm out and somebody like tells me I look bad. Who the fuck would say that? But like, you know how- Have they seen you? That's really nice. But I'm always worried that if I'm going- I wonder if I'm always worried that if I'm going out that someone's like,

ew, you look really fat or you look really bad or something, that that would be my perfect comeback of being like, well, I'm not here to please you. Yeah. I'm not for your consumption. Like I'm here just as a person. You don't have to look at me if you don't want. you get the beeper ready you know how i accidentally dropped a c the other day yeah this is not an accident one this is the proper one yep oh this is the girl

someone said that to you okay oh you look so fat well if you're the type of who would say that you're not the type of i want to hang. Yeah, I don't want you in my ****. Well, I think what I said would have implied also that they would not be in. Yeah. Yeah, I just want to just like **** as well. Yeah, it feels right, doesn't it? Yeah. Please beat them though.

What? Normal or nah? Taking off your shoes when you're in the cinema. Nah. I agree, nah. But cop this from Kevin Cordana. Oh, Kevin. I sat next to a woman when I was watching Thor.

Love and God. Maybe her feet were Thor. You got your feet off. Your feet, Thor. Your feet, Thor. She immediately popped her feet off. Your feet off. Your feet off. She immediately popped her shoes off. Now, Kevin kind of looked away and went, gross. And she heard.

And then she proceeded to stare at me and make comments about everything I did for the rest of the movie. Defensive much, says Kevin. What kind of stuff? Like every time he'd like go put his hands in the popcorn and be like You know when you try to open the chip packet and it's like really couldn't be louder and more excruciating to try

and open the ice cream. Or when you hear someone like opening their handbag and it's like they do it really slowly and it's like the deepest zip ever. Wait for a fucking explosion. Wait for something to happen. Yeah, or it's like the deepest zip ever. Wait for a fucking explosion. Wait for something to happen. Yeah, or it's like a quiet romantic love scene

and someone's like getting to the bottom of their cup of Coke. Or like shaking it and you can hear the ice going like. So every time Kevin moved, she was like. That's a high level of bitchy that I quite like. But people taking their shoes off, oh, sorry, what? After the movie, Kevin is like, what the fuck? I needed to call. And imagine you went through that experience.

You've got to call your best friend and go, you'll never believe what just happened. 100%, yeah. So Kevin's mortified, calls his best friend and goes, this bitch takes her shoes off. And Kevin's friend goes, yeah, I do that. And now Kevin's like, I need to know if this is normal or not. Am I the only one keeping their shoes on in the cinema?

Keep your shoes on in public. Thank you. People. Agreed. Do you know what really fucks me off? People that take their shoes off in the cinema on a plane. Oh, my God. keep your shoes on i know i just said keep your shoes on and then i just not take your fucking shoes off on a plane i think if it's a long haul not that i think this is okay but can i just be honest and please don't

you're already judging me it's too late to say don't judge me. Do you sometimes – You fucking would too. What does that mean? You fucking would. What does that mean? You just want to let us go, oh, anyone's got a problem with it, they can say something. No, I think sometimes you get like pins and needles in your foot.

Yeah. And so this might be a real – And then you sit still and you deal with it until you get off the plane. That's one option. For some reason, when you've got pins and needles or you're feeling a bit stiff, rubbing your foot, still in a sock, but like rubbing it and twisting it into the carpet kind of just gives a bit of relief. I hear what you're saying.

I do. I just saying. I do. I just disagree. I do disagree. But as you know, I'm probably not the best person to ask, like judge this because I don't like taking up space. So I would hate to bother someone by taking my shoes off. So I would never do it. But also you're like, you've got big feet.

You're tall. You've got big feet. So you can't just like twist your ankles around under the seat or whatever. Or when your knee is hitting the seat and you just feel so stuck and claustrophobic. Totally. You're like I just need to like wiggle my person. Don't you normally fly business anyway? No.

I did a little bit when I had the points. Because when you get points. They take your shoes off for you. Can I take those dusty Nikes off you and put you into a Nike slipper? And they take it off and your socks have got holes in them, your toes hanging out. Sir, sir? Hi, this is Nick and you're listening to Tony and Ryan.

A massive thank you to a few of our champion tapas over at our Patreon. You can check it out at the link in our show notes or the link in our bios on Instagram, the link in our bios on TikTok, the link in our bios on... Oh the link in our bios on TikTok, the link in our bios on... Oh, my God. Question. Question. Not related to the podcast. Be real.

Where are we? Are we doing be real? You let us know. I want to know whether I should get it because I saw one person doing it and I was like, that's fucking lame. And now lots of people have it and I've kind of got FOMO. But then I'm like, is it another thing I've got to fucking check that's going to give me anxiety because it dings off?

And I'm like, oh, my God, my pimples are showing. So give me the 101 of what you know Be Real to be. So once a day it dings and says it's time to be real. Yep. And you take like a photo like this and I'm pretty sure it snaps the front and the back camera at the same time but you can't see what the selfie one is so you can't like make yourself look cute.

And you snap it and you've only got two minutes to post it. So everybody uploads at the same time. Whoa. Yeah. And basically it's supposed to be like it snaps you, you can't plan it, and if you upload really late it says, like Tony uploaded 45 minutes late or two hours late or whatever. So they know she's a fraud.

She's not being real. Yes. Interesting. So would you want a Tony Lodge one or are you pitching like a Tony and Ryan one? No, because what if we're not together when it goes off? Well, then just one of us can do it. Or is that just too much admin? Who's going to do it?

That's a lot of admin. Yeah, that's stressful. Let us know. Let us know in the episode thread on Facebook, Tony and Ryan Facebook group. Yep. Let us know if you want us to be real. To be real.

Oh, fuck, just another social media. But I guess the good thing is that you don't get stuck in a scroll hole because it only goes off once a day. People only post once. Very true. So, like, depending on how many people you, like, follow or are friends with or however it works. I don't have the app.

I don't know. This is just what I – because I saw people posting about it, so I Googled it. What if it goes off mid-episode? Then I guess we have to fucking do it. And we're, like, we're recording a podo. Podo? That's new.

Yeah, that's new technology for us. Okay. Shut up, Tony. Thank you so much, Molly B. Ash Reid, Cheyenne Queen. Cheyenne. Cheyenne Queen. Yas Queen. Miranda. Jonathan Chan. Thank you so much, Molly B, Ash Reid, Cheyenne Queen. Cheyenne. Cheyenne Queen. Yas Queen.

You. Miranda, Jonathan Chan, thank you so much. Katie Franklin, Mia Ruby, Nicole Lopez-Bettendorf, Jason Coffell, and Ron Nguyen. Thank you so much for being part of our Patreon. Let us know if we should start a B-Reel. Tomorrow on the show, you're going to hear the lengths that tarpers have gone to to have sex.

And I mean literal how far have you travelled, what have you endured. What would you go through for it. When you just. Itching for that ditching. Oh, put that on a T-shirt. Let's say that from now on. See, I fucked up with podo, but I've come back around

for itching for a ditching. Itching for a ditching? Yeah, like put it in me ditch. You got it. You got a ditch where I can put this? Where can I ditch this? Why don't you? Yeah, I like that.

I'm a cum dumpster. You can ditch it in me. Also beep that out. No, cum dumpster's okay. Don't say it again, though. No, I'm not beeping cum dumpster. Okay, three is enough if you're not going to beep it. Fine, four.

No, I would never, Alex. Ryan. That was weird. Alex is Torb's, the heir to the Toberman's Home first name. Did you just call me Alex? Yeah, I did. I've never done that before. Is that because does he?

What just happened? Well, you said the word come. Why was it while I was talking about come, dumb start? Oh, my God. This is my be real right now. Have you ever called Alex Ryan? No. No.

Why did you make that sound? What do you mean? Why would I call him Ryan? Well, you just Why did you make that sound? What do you mean? Why would I call him Ryan? Well, you just called me Alex. Yeah. That was so weird. That was so weird. I think I called Bridget Tony once. Was it during sex? No.

Have you ever? Why did I pull it? It wasn't. No. You were really like, no. Anyway, can we talk about something else? Sure. Well, you're not going to want to talk about this. I've got a question for parents. A lot of parents that listen to the Tony and Ryan podcast.

Do you ever get jealous of the fun things that your kids get to do? Playing in the playground. Yeah. Eating fairy bread. Watching Disney cartoons without judgment or the need to justify why you're watching a cartoon. Also, kids have the sickest toys. Yeah, toys now are unreal.

Kids just have so much shit to do. Yeah. And I've got shit to do that's boring, like work and pay bills and stuff. So a lot of my friends having children, fingers crossed for Bridget and I. Yes, very exciting stuff. Hopefully that happens soon. But there's a bit of a vibe amongst parents that like, these kids have got it pretty good.

Yeah. And these kids are having a way better time than I'm having. You know, there's the kind of this, the bit of jealousy setting in. I have this desire to play in a big, you know, the ball pit. Oh, my God. Wouldn't you love to just dive in? Yeah. I'd love to be in the ball pit.

And I mean the kids one, not the dance floor at Peel. Nice. Nice. Yep. Jump into one of those big foam pits. I thought this would be the ultimate. And I mentioned this to my mate, Tony Lodge. And Tony Lodge says, maybe not as fun for adults as you might think. Yeah. Now, Tony, why is an adult in a foam pit not as fun as I might think it is? It might be fun for an adult that isn't me. I don't know if this is like an experience that only I've had. I really hope not.

But this is a couple of years ago, and it was when I was living in Bunbury. I was working in radio. So I'd moved away from all of my family and friends. And so the work crew used to get together and do, like, random shit all the time. And they opened a Bounce in Bunbury. Awesome. So, like, you remember when Bounce was new?

And it's, like, one of those trampoline centres but then they've also got, like, the long trampolines where you run up and, like, dunk a basketball. Oh, they're fun. But then they've also got, like, a foam pit. Yeah. And over the top of the foam pit is, like, a balance beam. So you're like, oh, got a balance, don't fall into the foam pit. Yeah, and they've got those, like, things where you, like,

wrestle and, like and whoever wins. Oh, like Gladiator. Remember that TV show Gladiator? Yes, exactly like that. So good. I mean, a bit less brutal, I guess. Vulcan wasn't there. Who's that?

Your friend? One of the great gladiators of Australian gladiator history. Of course. I remember. Yeah, yeah, yeah, Vulcan. Sorry, I thought you said Culkin. He ended up in Fast and the Furious movies. Really?

As one of the heavies, like a bit of a tough guy. Fuck it. Where are these? What? You just said tough. Fuck it. Where are these? What? You just said tough. Did I? Yes. I need to get this out of my vocabulary.

What's happened to me? I've left commercial radio and I've turned into a real potty mouth. Potty mouth. Okay, I'm back to sounding lame. Good, I'm back. I'm back. I'm back. Anyway, so they had one of those.

And I was there with a bunch of like friends from work. So, you know, you're kind of trying to like put your best foot, like you get along well, you know each other, but you're trying to like look cool and do, you know, you know. I know. I get it. And one of the guys that I went with, Jesse, we're really, really good mates still.

He works on Carrie and Tommy, which is like a radio show, and he's fucking handsome. He's very tall, very good looking. A beautiful deep voice. Oh, Tony, you don't mind the video? I love Jesse. We get along very, very well. He's a very nice guy.

Anyway, and he was there and we went over to do the balance beam thing together. He obviously pushed me off. I'm tiny. He's tall, like obviously. He pushed me off into the foam pit and I was like, oh, my God, how am I going to get out? There is obviously stairs, so it's fine. There was not any stairs.

I wouldn't have assumed there were stairs. Because you could probably hit your head or something on them, right? And do you fall into the foam or do you feel onto the foam? You know what I'm saying? Some people might fall on. I fell in. Oh, right. And how deep was the foam, you know what I'm saying? Some people might fall on. I fell in. Oh, right. And how deep was the foam?

Probably like a regular tall person's body height. Like a pool? Like it's above your head kind of thing? No, not above your head. But it's up there? Like, you know, in the shallow end of the pool, how it kind of goes up to your waist? Yeah.

But then like in the middle of the pool, it kind of comes up to. Probably your chest. Yeah. Shoulders. Probably about that on me in the shallow part ah right so jesse falls in like jumps in after me and he just goes over to the edge and like pulls himself out because he's really tall uh goes to the gym a lot so he was body. He was fun. Yep. I like weighed through the foam. The off cuts of foam. And this is like, yeah, like foam like from a mattress, not foam.

It's hard to move through foam, right? Yeah, because it's solid. You can't just walk over. In case anybody is thinking that we mean like at a foam party, I mean like off cuts of foam like at gymnastics. Dare I say like a pink bat. Yes, a bit like a pink bat, but no asbestos. I think there's asbestos in those.

So I'm like trying to wade through the foam and like, have you ever been in a foam pit? Yeah. And like, you know how the foam kind of like crumbles up a bit and so you get sweaty and you get stressed and like the foam kind of like sticks you like a crumbly biscuit. Yeah, okay. So that's what's happening to me.

So I'm getting like all these bits of foam stuck to me and I'm getting like really, really stressed. I'm getting really, really sweaty. A real life Golden Gate time. Yep. All the crumbs, all the juicy bits. Yep. I absolutely was. Yep.

And so I like wade over to the edge. Jessie's already gotten out and kind of like started walking away. And started driving home. Yeah. And like I'm like trying to, I can't get enough purchase on the edge of the thing to, like, hoist myself out because I wasn't tall enough. And even when I kind of, like, jumped out, I don't have enough upper body strength to, like,

pull my body out of the foam pit. So were you just on the side just – I'm literally just, like, bobbing up and down, like, trying to get out of the thing, and I couldn't. How long did you try for? So I started to panic. So Jessie had started walking away probably just like bobbing up and down, like trying to get out of the thing. And I couldn't. How long did you try for? So I started to panic. So Jessie had started walking away probably like a minute or two. That's a long time.

Yes. When you're trying to. Because I didn't want anyone to notice. Because I didn't want them to be like, oh, chubby girl stuck in the phone pit. So you didn't want anyone to think chubby girl stuck in the phone pit. But what had happened? I was a chubby girl stuck in the phone pit.

So, I mean, it was doing what it said on the tin. You know what I mean? But you don't want to broadcast that. No, I didn't want to tell anyone. Anyway, so I was like, Jesse, Jesse, Jesse. And anyway, he turns around and sees that I'm stuck. And I was like, I can't get out. I'm like looking very panicked.

And he was like, oh, my God. He starts laughing. He like sprints over. And he tries to like start to try and like hoik get out. I'm like looking very panicked. And he was like, oh, my God. He starts, I mean, he like sprints over. And he tries to like, starts to try and like hoik me out. That's nice. How did he go? He couldn't lift me out. Because I was so stressed and panicked by this point. I was so sweaty.

He like couldn't grab onto my arms. And I was panicking that he couldn't like. Is it the moment where you probably just need to stay calm, but it's the last thing. And the more you panic, then you panic about the fact you're panicking. Yes. It's like when you try a ring on in a store and then you can't get it off and then you're like, I've got to buy this.

I'm so sorry. Just cut my finger off. It's fine. I don't mind. I don't need it. I don't need it. I don't need it. I point with this one, not that one.

I'm right-handed, so it's fine. And he's like, I can't get you. And he's pissing himself laughing. I was pissing myself laughing to try and not cry. Yeah. And then all of a sudden, so it turns out that there was, like, a sports team that went to bounce, like, obviously to, like, practice. Go to training.

Like when I was basketball. Yeah. Because they're, like, fit and, like, practice. Go to training. Like, go and train. Yeah. Because they're, like, fit and athletic and they're doing flips and shit. Yes. Yeah, yeah. So probably, like, six pretty jacked dudes walk over to do, like, their training around the thing. And Jesse's like, but he didn't consult me, so this is, you know,

a real breach of friendship contract. He goes, oi, guys. And he... Oh, no. And we just... No, no, no, no. I wanted to throw up and die. But did you also want to get out of the phone, Pete?

You know what I mean? Well, yeah, but I was so... And I don't embarrass easily. Like, I actually don't. I, like, get stressed about and anxious, but I don't get embarrassed. But was this one of those times? I was really...

I was embarrassed that I couldn't get out and that Jesse couldn't get me out. Anyway, he's like, oi, guys. Fuck. And so they come over and I was like. Oh, what's going on? And I was like, I'm sorry, I cannot get out. And I fucking shit you not, these six dudes all, like, had their hands on a limb and they had to hoik me out of the foam pit.

I looked like a child at swimming lessons who, like, couldn't get out of the pool. What's that vending machine game where the claw comes? Like the claw game? And picks you up. They came down and placed me on the edge of the thing. Pulled you out of the other toilet. Yeah.

And so they all hoiked me. And, like, they did it with ease. Like, it was fine. And I was just like, oh. And, you know, there is. Do they hoik you to your feet or do they just, like, lay you down? So I just want to paint the picture. They hoik me out, throw me down like a rag doll.

There is just nothing more humbling than laying on the ground. Like this, covered in crumbly bits of foam because I'm all sweaty. I'm in my active wear. I was like, thanks, everyone. Thanks, boys. Thanks for getting me out. I was like, yeah, there's something wrong in there. Like, I don't know.

It's malfunction. So with the shame that you experienced and the embarrassment. Yeah, and all these hot boys that had to fucking pull me out of that. If I give you one of two options here, if you had your time again, would you rather A, the hot boys came over and they lifted you out and just flung you down in your crumbs? Also, when I'm picturing hot boys, I'm picturing Justice Crew for some reason when you're telling the story.

Yeah, the dance crew. Because I'm thinking Rip Fit, like, oh, Justice Crew will get you. To be honest, yeah, I blacked out. Would you rather that or still be in the phone pit years later? C, third option, stay home, not go. Yeah, you should have cancelled. All right, things you love to see. You would have seen this because it's been everywhere on the internet.

This 99-year-old woman, Katerina Oduna Perez. Hi, Katerina. Well, you can't say hi because unfortunately she's passed away. Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Oh, not sorry. That's awful. That is awful. Terrible news.

99 years old. Fuck, what an innings. What an innings. Now, her dying wish that came true. She wanted to be buried under a giant penis. Have you seen this online? No. So there's the tombstone and there's this big, girthy, thick dong

sticking out the top of the tombstone or whatever. And let me see here. Her grandson. She wanted to break the paradigm of everything Mexican because Mexico can sometimes be steeped in tradition and not be very open-minded. And so everything was like very traditional and proper. A bit conservative. A bit conservative.

Yep. She always had this very avant-garde, very forward-thinking, progressive image. And she was just like, I don't want my death to be, like, sad and sombre. I want it to be, like, random and funny. And so when every time my kids come and visit me, they'll be like, Grandma, what an idiot. How funny.

There's a giant dong on her tombstone. That one's not a tomb raider. It's a womb raider. Yeah. So, I mean, as far as dying wishes go, congratulations to the family. And rest in peace, Katerina. And it does seem like she was a very forward-thinking, fun, loving grandma and mother and a person in society. So, I mean, what a beautiful way to end a beautiful life.

And I'm glad that it's like doing the rounds online as well. It really is. I'll put a link in the episode thread because when you see the size and the girth of this thing, I mean, put me in the grave, man. That'll do me. That's lovely. Might love to see it. That's lovely.

Very diplomatic. Might love to see it is Liz from our Facebook group shared that she finally graduated from cosmetology school. She's had a really rough go of it. She's lost lots of loved ones through the journey of being in school. And she has four kids, three that live at home that she's caring for while she's studying. And, you know, kids fucking get sick all the time,

so she had to take heaps of time off to, like, have them home from daycare and things like that, which is just a fucking logistical nightmare. Like, can you imagine being at work and then you get a call and you're like, I've got to go pick up my kids. Schools, preschool, cesspit of germs. Yeah, they say that, eh? And it's been her dream job for 15 years since she was 16

and she's finally finished the school. And she said that Tony and Ryan gave her a good laugh when all she wanted to do was cry. So you fucking love to see that. You fucking love to see that. As someone who does one subject at university and has zero children and finds it tough to fit it in, that is actually unbelievable. No, the subject's in, Tony. Don't wink at me when I say it.

Sorry. Yep. We're trying to spin a nice message about Liz. Yeah, you're Liz to say it. Yeah, the subject's in, Tony. Don't wink at me when I say it. Sorry, yep. We're trying to spin a nice message about Liz. Liz, yeah. You're Liz to say it. Yeah, you do Liz to say it. Tomorrow on the show. Tomorrow.

The distance and the things people have travelled, endured, gone through to get some fun times. What would you do for Dick? Yep. That's tomorrow's episode name. Chat to you then. Love you, bye.