Toni and Ryan - How To Get Out Of Jury Duty

Episode Date: August 11, 2026

Mountain dew - Music chat - Jury duty- love ya!!!!!Video for this EP is available on YOUTUBECheck out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toniandryanpodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Why would you be a good juror? I love rules. Why do you think that you should be on this panel today? I've been on a gambling website and the markets are paying $1.40 for guilty, so it seems like the people are pretty sure. Oh, Ryan, you can't. What'd you call me? Hey, my name is Jenna from Alabama in the USA.

Hi, I'm Dakota from Cockatoo in Victoria, Australia. Hi, it's Lynn from Belfast and Northern Ireland. And I approve this podcast. Welcome to the Tony. and Ryan podcast. My name is Ryan. This is Dr. Arthur Tony Lodge. Welcome.

Straight men are more loyal to Mountain Dew than they are to most relationships. Charles, bring up the article. Sorry, what a thing to take on this early in the day. This guy in America dropped his Mountain Jew into a Portaloo, like a portable toilet. And instead of riding off the $4 or whatever a Mountain Dew's worth, he dived in after it and ended up being stuck in there for eight hours. What?

First of all, if you dropped a drink, regardless of whether it was Mountain Dew or Diet Coke, whatever, you wouldn't want to drink it after it had been in the Porter Party. Well, it was in the bottle. Yeah, but what are you going to do? Wipe the bottle off and go for gold. Actually, yeah, who am I defending here? You know, yeah, first of all, let's think about whose side you're off. Mountain Dew has a stranglehold over straight men. I, I'm not a huge fan of Mountain Dew.

Do you know, I think that it's a really left of field drink for me. It's like not one that I grew up. I grew up in a Coca-Cola amatil household. Yep. Which I think is very clear. Yeah. But when we, if we ever had KFC, which was not very often, seven up. Seven up.

Seven up is my PepsiCo. Drink of choice. Yeah. Though I do like a solo as well. Solo is fucking rule. But I think that Mountain Dew for me is very left of field. And for me, a seven up is also very left of field And that feels like that kind of energy

Both grain So true Yeah What flavour What flavour is mountain dew? Is that what that was the thing? What flavour is mountain dew? Exactly

You have to ask Green I guess it's a lemon lime Me sort of thing Lemon lime yeah Like closer to a squash than a lemonade Mmm Yeah

Like more lemony than like a lemon Absolutely. But lemonade, lemon flavor. Mountain Dew. Yeah. Yeah. And seven up as well down that way, I'd say. What would you stay in a Portaloo for for eight hours for?

Not my daughter. Sorry. If my daughter fell in a Port-a-Loo, I'd be like, we've had a great run, sweetheart. I love you. And I would close the lid and close the door and just wish you all the best and leave. What if, yeah. I don't think there's anything worth climbing into a Port-a-Loo. I think that a port-le-let-alone, let alone a bottle of mountain dew.

Mountain Dew, no. I think a port-a-lou is one of my worst scenarios that I could find myself in. Really? Like, if a port-a-leu is the option for a bathroom, I will hold it till I get home. What about music festivals? Oh, well, I don't do that, really. Like, I've only, I haven't ever been to a, music festival and like camp or anything.

Yeah. Like, yeah, I mean, if I'm desperado, but like it is, I don't like it. Yeah.

To be fair, I don't think anyone likes it, but when you need to go. The smell of the plastic in the sun, the smell of what's in the toilet in the sun. Yeah, on a hot day. Like,

it's so claustra. And I don't really feel claustrophobic very often, but like, it's everything about it for me. I'm just, If you've got to pull your pants down, they touch the ground. Like everything about it just like really escapes me out. So that Falls Festival in 2007.

What's Falls? Is that the one in Tazzy? No. Yeah, there is one in Tazzy, but this was in Lawn down the Great Ocean Road. Oh, yep. I think Phil and I, it was the last day and we found, like, we bought some chocolate ice cream. And we, it had been in the Eski for three days and it's kind of gone a bit soft. so I took it in my pocket into the Portaloo

and then like rubbed Boys are just the what the fuck bro and I like rubbed the chocolate ice cream into my hands and like on my chest and stuff and then like because there's a line for the toilet so everyone's like waiting and then I like burst out of the toilet and just went blah

okay that's actually very funny I thought that you were going to say you put the ice cream all over the toilet and I was like don't fuck for everyone else you ask. I would never do that. Well, that's why I was like, oh, dude, but that's funny. Thank you.

So it looked like you were covered in shit. Yeah. But no one else had to suffer that. No, I was like, well, look out for that one. Yeah. So how did you get the ice cream off you? Ice cream. Jumped off like into the little creek damn thing and like.

Oh, damn. Damn. They needed to call the fire brigade to cut this guy out. But so they needed to like cut the thing in half. to get him out of it. And then because the fire brigade was there, they used the hose to, like, hose him down. And what's the question we're all thinking?

Yes, he did leave with the mountain dew. Let it go. You know that episode of The Simpsons where Homer is stuck in two vending machines? And they're like, could you try letting it go? And then he's like, oh. Sir, you're not just holding onto the can, I? Oh, well, good for hearing his mouth. Mountain Dew.

Yeah. Yeah. Why are you taking a Mountain Dew into the toilet? Well, you're at a vent and you're holding it. What are you going to do? Leave it out the front? Yeah. Ask the person behind you in the line.

Be like, can you hang on to my Mountain Dew? You don't talk to people in the line on the toilet. Eyes down. Okay. Welcome to Girlhood. All of the best friends I've ever made on a night out have been in the bathroom. Need a lip gloss. Need a tampon.

Need a, oh my God. Love your dress. It's so cute. Where's it from? Oh my God. It has pockets. Amazing. Where are your glasses from?

I need new ones. When was the last time you had your eyes tested? Oh, your mum said, I'm so sorry to hear that. Your uncle sounds like a... Like, the whole spectrum of human emotion and friendship is discovered in the line to the toilet. I think there's a difference, and please let me know on the episode 3

or YouTube comments, if I'm wrong. The bathroom at a venue, 100%. Outside in the sun... Like, I think it's different. I think they're not comparable. because when it's in the sun, it's sweaty, you're all bracing yourself for the Port-a-loo. Like, it's a different game.

There's like a shame to it. You're like, you need a shit that bad. You're going to go. And you're out in the sun line. Yeah, like, you're telling everyone. Yeah, like, it's almost like, and you walk out and you're like, and everyone's like in the line. You're like, try to look down.

Because you can't get away from the fact that you're the last one in there. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Because of the bathroom in a club, 100%. I'm willing to hear people's opinions. but I reckon you still make them friends.

I think this summer you need to hit a festival. Okay. Could be the summer of Lodge. Last name pending. I think the thing for me is that like going to a festival, sure. But like it's the festival experience from like when you're younger, when you camp and you whatever. I probably won't ever get that now.

You should and should. Are you inviting me? I'm not inviting myself. If you invite me though, you'll cancel at the last minute and then I'll have to go. Why do I have to go? Because this is the thing. I've done it.

I've had my rider passage. So you don't want to take me, show me the ropes. Nah. Oh, see? I guess I won't go. Do you come and spill milk later there in the year? What's that? Is that in Canberra?

No, no. There's one here in Geelong. Oh, on the Vigline. Mm. Use my smart rider. Lewis Capowdy, Ray. Fuck, my Mikey expired. I didn't replace it.

I got the email the other day. What? Lewis Capowty and Ray are the headlines. Oh, baby. Yeah. Yeah. Is that right? Yeah.

Because we've listened to that song a hundred times and I always assumed it was Little Mix. Yeah. Yeah. Like, think of the kind of song it is and the kind of stuff for Little Mix can do. Oh, yeah. It's just like that like fun, like pop song. Yeah. Um, Little Mix still a thing. They still make and tune? Little Mix, uh, went on an indefinite hiatus in May 2022. Oh. Bummer. I love that one song.

I'll take that back. work from home yeah that's the song I was talking about oh then hey and what's another little mix song but wasn't work from home just a fuck

oh that's fifth harmony isn't it that's what he had little mix no that who's little mix what's a little mix song this is little mix we can work from home black magic

oh Charles you play this is a shout out to my ex that's a really good song wings don't know that these wings were made for flying or something? No.

Slaid. Secret love song looks like it's been played a few times. Charles plays black magic all the time. And it's called black magic and it's called black magic. Yeah. Dig it's up on my secret potion.

Yeah. I make you fall in love. Who's the song by that work from home though? We can work from home. Fifth Harmony. Camilla Cabo. Is Camilla Cabo in Fifth Harmony? Yeah.

That's crazy. Yeah. So was she a breakout star from there? Yeah. Other songs, a fifth harmony done. What about I'm work from home? That's... I love the film clip for that song.

It's so funny. Work from home. I also then loved that song going viral during COVID. Yeah. Because everybody was working from home. Oh, worth it was big. What's worth it? Yeah, baby, I'm worth it.

Oh, no, that's talked dirty to me by... Oh, I was also thinking about that. Yeah. I don't know what it is then. Give it to me. It's just a different saxophone. Yeah. What's, um, that's my girl.

You've liked that, Charles? No, it's just downloaded. That means it's just in a playlist. If you want to have a good time, go and watch the video clip. And I always do. The video clip of work from home and just pick one of them each time. And just watch one specific person for the whole video.

Okay. Because as a How many times have you done that? No, because as a group, you're like, oh, they're kind of on a work site, cool. But when you focus on one of them, you just realize how little work they're doing.

Oh, they're working it. I think that you've missed the message. No, but one's like pretending to shovel and they've just missed by so far. I love it. I love that they're wearing like, that's Camilla Cabo.

Oh my God, Slay. Camilla Casayo. I didn't know that she was in a girl group. Very hot and cool. God. Oh, well, wonderful stuff. Why'd you turn it off? Oh, we're doing a podcast.

We're working from home. Well, no, we're working from office. Tap Tower. I recently watched Dura number two. What's that? Amazing movie. I didn't prep this. Oh, I'm not.

Oh, sorry, I'm going to be. We'll be back in a sec. Faye the thing. Hi, it's Lynn from Belfast, Northern Ireland. Hi, I'm Dakota from Cockatoo. What's up? It's Jenna from Alabama and the USA. And you're watching Tony Ryan.

Welcome back, everyone! That's so unlike me. That is so unlike me. Not to piss myself, but to not be prepared. A massive shout out to be like, I'll come here from my death, bed. I know you're so sad. I feel so, you're please understand.

I feel really, really terrible. I have just quickly prepped something while I was in the bathroom. Oh, hello. Do you know where my phone is? No. I haven't seen in ages. Like today?

That's a good start. It might be next to your car keys, which might be in your car. The next to my car keys, great, that narrows a doubt. That could be any of it. A massive shout-out to a few of our champion tapas. Elma Lynn, good on your Elmer.

Mark Bailey, Andy Thornton-Zegler. Good on your Andy. These are the ones from yesterday. Fuck, what's going on over there, dude? Amazing shout out. Ellen, shoemaker, good on you, Ellen. Jane Blair. What the fuck is going on here?

I know. I'm so, this is so unlike me. We've lost it. After five years, this is where it's the cracks appearing. Madison Decoe, which you call me. Sophie, Go on your Sophie, James Thompson. Katie, R. Rosalie de Wolf.

Rosalie de Puppie. Rosalie de Cat. Meow. Alice Barrett. Decapitated. DiCaprio. Leonardo DeCatrio. Liam Miaodo. Alice Borritt, Stephen Lannan, and especially I love you to Tapa Riddell from Chris.

Thank you very much for being part of our Patreon. I absolutely love to say it. And I am ready to go whenever you are. So I'm here for you, 1,000 million percent. I've recently watched Euro number two. Wonderful. What's that? It's a movie directed by Clint Eastwood,

and it's got every actor and actress you can ever think of in it. Clint Eastwood, have you seen Million Dollar Baby? He's in that, eh? Yeah, he directed that, I believe. Really? And he's one of the leads. Wow.

It's got Nicholas Holt, Zoe Dooch, Tony Collette, Kiefer Sutherland, J.K. Simmons, Kress Messina, and Leslie Bibb. Great. Do you know any of those people? I know who Tiny Colette is. Yep. I know who.

Christmasina is the partner in Julie and Juliet. Slay? Yep, he's in the Mindy Project. Kiva Sutherland, 24? No, I don't know who that is. Are you fucking type in Keefer Sutherland, Charles. He would be at the top, Charles, I reckon. Oh, he might not be.

J.K. Simmons, I know who that is. Click on Nicholas Holt. Yeah, I know who Nicholas Holt is. because he was in skins. Who's Zoe Dooch? She was in the voicemails movie. I haven't saying that. Don't watch it.

Oh, there he is. Larry. Keith of Sutherland. Down, down, down. Up. Are you fucking. I love that. We're like, there it is.

We're looking for Kiefer Sutherland. There it is. That guy. Are you joking? Oh, I do recognize him from 24, as you said. But I don't know the face. I don't know the name to the face. Do you know what I mean?

Anyway, in this movie, and this isn't a spoiler, because it happens at the start, so Nicholas Holtz the main character, him and Zoe Dooch, they're expecting their child to be born any day. Oh, amazing. And he's like, I can't, like, so basically they're like,

is there any reason why he can't do jury duty? Oh, he gets called up for jury duty. Yeah, and no one wants to do it because they're like, we've got our own lives to live. Tony would love to do it. So everyone, you basically get a chance to say, well, he's why, you shouldn't pick me.

And he goes, oh, look, my wife's giving birth in a few weeks, like, I'd hate to miss out. And the judge goes, look, what are your normal work out? And he goes, oh, nine to six. And she goes, we're not going to be any longer than that. It's going to be the same as you go on a work. It's like, you're in. Just do it. It's your civic duty and it's a privilege.

Well, the judge actually says the reason why you'll all be good jurors is because you don't want to do it. You're not coming in with any preconceived, like, you know? Because do you reckon these days? now people that get caught up for jury duty are probably like I listen to true crime podcast I know exactly what I'm looking at you know what I mean yeah oh

I let you do the thing so what I thought would be fun is I said to Tony why don't we do a segment where we try and say stuff yep so we could get out of it yeah and then Tony goes nah I would really fucking love to do it I want to say stuff so they would definitely pick me I said, I don't think, I don't think that would be genuine because I would really like to do jury duty.

And then she goes, I'll prepare some. Yeah. And then I just did. Let's put it in for Wednesday. And then I just did and I've done it. I think I've told this story on the pod before about when I did actually get called up for jury duty. I'd like just turned 21, I think. And I got called up and I was so thrilled.

And I wore like a cute little outfit because I was like office girl. and I was going to uni at the time. I emailed all my lecturers because I was like probably won't be in like jury duty. And I was like, how good? Like a week off uni? Like fucking sleigh.

I wasn't working so I was like, I'll get paid to do this thing. Anyway, and I go in there and I'm so excited and there's like a room of like four or 500 people or whatever and they narrow it down and there's five people

that don't get chosen and I'm one of them. Out of four or 500. Mm-hmm. Fuck off. At that point, it's not even like, you don't get interviewed. It's just like them pulling your number. Yeah. So they go through and they go, okay, this trial is for XYZ and it's going to, we think it's

going to go for seven days. Numbers, blibla, blah, blah, blah. And then they call those people and I'm sitting there and I'm like, oh my God, all I want is to get picked and I didn't. And I was so fucking gutted. Devo, bro. Yeah. Devo bro.

But everybody that did get picked was probably like, fuck, I could do that this. I'm like, I'll take your spot. Yeah. And I got dismissed after like three hours. Do you get paid for those three hours? I think I could apply for the train fare, but admin. Yeah. And then I still, I was finished in time to go to my uni lecture that day.

Isn't that depressing? Oh, I was so upset. You don't even have a good excuse. I know. And so I went home and I had a shower and that's when I got off at the job at Hot FM in Bumbrough that same day. Well, if you had it got jury, duty, we'd mean how to take that call. It would have gone to voicemail.

And you know what I mess my voicemail is at the moment. Is it still what that thing? Yeah. Yeah. And the trade did the other day that he didn't think it was that funny. He didn't like it. No, he didn't like it, no. Anyway, so I've prepared some reasons why I think I should get picked in, you know, beforehand to today.

I wonder if my things that I'm going to say to not get picked are exactly the same things as your things to get picked. They're not. But I think you're probably more likely to get, because if you said in this movie, they're like, oh, you don't want to do it so you're probably a good candidate. Well, they're trying to get out of it. But I'm not even, I just think I'm enthusiastic in the way that I'm like, oh, I want to see this go well, you know?

Tony Lodge, why would you be a good juror? I love rules. Oh, hmm. I love rules. I love justice and I think that I'm the perfect person to be here. You love justice? Yeah. So you want them to get justice?

Oh, no, I just want the right person to get, um, thingo. Like, I want, you know what I mean? Ryan, John, why do you think that you should be on this panel today? Will I watch heaps of true crime? And within the first two minutes, I always just know. I'm good at it. You're hired. Oh, no.

What else? I just reckon that'd be like, oh, too keen. I've got, yeah. So, but you're trying to like, give them the, give them the, Like give him the ick deliberately. Yeah. I think that I should be picked because I'm very fair and I'm also wise. Luck a owl.

Ooh, did it. Ooh, did it. Um, Ryan, John, why do you think that you should be on this panel today? Well, as a Pisces, I felt he had murder energy and my intuition, Your Honor, is rarely wrong. Well, yeah, you're out. You mentioned a star sign. You're out. Isn't just as I insert any star sign here.

You're just like, whoa. Or just as a, not even star sign, as anything. Yeah. You know, like, as an empath. Yeah, or like in a comment section on the thing, like the video is like, here is how to cook an egg. And someone goes, well, actually, as a radiographer, I must say that that's not it. Well, as a New Zealand, are you holding that lamb wrong?

Sorry from Monday. I have a really good memory so you won't have to repeat yourself at all. So you should pick me. A good memory? You're good at this. Yeah. I think that that would get me picked. I've got an excellent memory.

I'm very fair. And I love rules. Though I did forget to do this. So that might have done my own case here. I've been on a gambling website and the markets are paying $1.40 for guilty. So it seems like the people are pretty sure. Like if it's $1.40, you probably did it. Oh, Ryan, you can't.

What'd you call me? You can't. You should not... That's terrible. Your Honor, as of Pisces, I've got the intuition. I've checked the gambling markets. Pretty sure he did it. And with true crime, I'm just like, I always win.

Get him. I mean, you're definitely not getting us to stay on. Or do you think they see through that now? Or they can't take a chance. How many people can you dismiss? Because you can't dismiss everyone, can you? I think there's like... I guess you could.

The judge can dismiss whoever. this bullshit. But the lawyers can only dismiss. It's like four or five without a reason. But then reasons are still like a reason. Yeah. Fuck. I think I would be too enthusiastic and I reckon that they would ask me to leave.

Too keen. I think so. They often, in the movie they talked a lot about like, if anything ever gone wrong to them. So say if someone had stolen from you and the person didn't get caught. because you've got like a pre-disposed, like... Just the built-up, like, fuck them. Yeah, no, if they stole, fuck them.

Like, throw them in the bloody... Throw away the key. I thought you're going to say throw him in the river and I was like, spoilers. No. Is that what happened? It's actually a great movie. Well, no, I'm going to watch now

because you know that... Nicholas Holt's having a baby and he gets thrown in the river. Nah, you know all that stuff, but the whole time I watch this movie, as in the setup. Who's the judge, Tony Collette? No, she's the lawyer. Slake.

a politician. Oh. Can you be both? Well, she's like the attorney general and she's running for mayor and this is like a big case. Oh. And I reckon 12 different times during the movie of Jura number two. Bridget and I looked at each other and went, what would you do?

I love movies like that. Because there were so many like moral like, oh, like technically yes, but you'd probably not. And like, oh, he saw that. Would you just say it? Would you say that you've seen it? Or would you let that, like there's a lot of. I like that. Moving parts.

You, this is a little bit off topic, but Torbs and I watched this movie the other day. What's the new film with Zendaya and Robert Patterson in it? The Odyssey. Which isn't the Odyssey. What's it called the drama or whatever? The A-24 film. Torbs and I watched that like a week after we got married. And the film is like, we're getting married next week.

and they're at this dinner party and the two people that they're at dinner with are like, oh, right before we got married, we told each other our deepest, darkest secret. You guys should do that to each other. And they're like, oh, I don't think we really have any secrets. And the couple that they're there with are like, oh, for example, mine was blah and his was blah.

Then they go, what would yours be? And they share it. And Herssey's like crazy. Yeah, right. And Torbson, like, looks to me, he pauses the movie. He goes, well, what would yours be? And I'm like, well, we're already. married.

Like, it's too late. And did that throw? Oh, you should watch the movie. It's really good. Like, the movie's really good. Do you have one? Well, we kind of would, I'm like, oh, what would it be and whatever? I mean, it's nothing like what they say in the film just to make that very clear.

Tony Lodge. Yeah. What is your deepest, darkest secret? I don't really, I don't really have. That's what someone keeping a secret would say. That's so true. What would yours be? Don't know. Yeah.

What would mine be? Dismissed. But anyway, Torbs and I sat there for a bit and we're like, oh, well, and I was like, oh, I don't really, like, I've never, the stuff that they say is like, would keep you up at night, some of it. And so that's more. And I was like, is there something, you know. I'm going to say something. Yeah.

If you've watched the movie, I mean. In grade five. I didn't do the school concert because I was sick. I wasn't sick. I just didn't want to go. And I had like a kind of a big role. Oh, and you just bailed? I was like, I'm not going to do it.

Ryan. I think mum and I were going to Bali like that week. And I went and got like all the injections. Yeah. And you know how you're just a bit like... Oh, you feel a bit like lethargic and stuff. Yeah, and I just went... Well, that sounds like you actually were sick.

But did you tell anybody? Oh, like, mum called in sick. Yeah, so they knew. They weren't like, we're only five. Where's Ryan? Yeah, or they're like, oh, and then the, uh, this character walked in. Yeah, the wizard will see you now and that just didn't happen. Yeah, no.

Yeah, I think that's okay. But I was actually kind of fine. My arm was a bit sorry. I think that's okay. you let someone know but you've been carrying that yeah thank you for opening up to us I actually feel so much lighter now

yeah you look great thank you yeah um Tony I actually don't really have any like I don't really have anything I poured my heart out no you did you did that was a deep dark thing when I was in year five um I was supposed to do this school concert

and the guy who was the lead didn't rock her up and that was crazy. I barely prepped the thing that you asked me to do. I don't have this ready to go. Maybe you need some KFC wicked boneless that reveals deep truths. Deep truths, yeah. Actually, I've got another one. Okay.

I actually played both Riano and Johnny. What? Luckily, you weren't sick. You didn't call in sick to do it. The twin Johnny said, oh. Oh. Yeah. So you're not.

going on the jury but do you think I am I think we both got our intended result I think you're on and I'm off I think do you think that would get me on or do you think they'd think I was too keen and they're like no I think I think I think that was good what do you think Charles I think it was I think too keen because like are you trying to play the other side of it like are they thinking you're trying to play the other side of it by doing that would you want to do it if you got called up yeah I would 100% want to do it yeah say you're out but I look at that little scrinkily look in his eyes. I would like to do a high,

like a high profile one. Like one that like, we don't get to choose. Yeah, but I would like to do one of those. Yeah, like where you get sequestered and stuff. Yeah.

I mean, that would be very exciting. Should we do something where we get locked up for a week and we're on like the no outside noise and it's just like we're a jury? What? Because part of being in the jury is like you can't read the papers and do stuff. They all stay together and it's like. Yeah.

Sequested. That's what we're doing about. Yeah. Should we do that? Oh. Um, for a or just

should we do it for fun? Yeah. No. What? Like, and we have to, like by the end of the week, we have to have made a decision on something.

I mean, we can, but I don't. I think if we were to do it, it would have to be like in a villa in Bali. Charles, can you stop sending me fucking Airbnbs

that we should stay in for no reason? Yeah, does sound fun though. Would we have a pool? Yeah, yeah, of course. I'd like that. That sounds great.

What do we? deciding, oh, where's the next cocktail coming from? The jury has decided. It's unanimous. Sparse margaritas. And a taco, if you don't mind. Who's taco? Mine.

Now, Tony Lodge, what do you love to see? I've got to you love to say it. From Mel B. Not the Spice Girl, a different one. Mel said, Hi, Tony, I'm back on Patreon. Yay, welcome back. Welcome back.

I just want to let you know that. on an episode a while ago, you spoke about having a cordless hot glue gun, and I couldn't stop thinking about how amazing that would be. Todd bought me a cordless hot glue gun for my birthday. It's like battery powered. So you can glue anywhere. Hot glue guns were the best thing about primary school. You would not be given a hot glue gun in primary school.

Absolutely. No way. Maybe year five, at the minimum. Oh, top end, but yeah, not. Yeah. Yeah. Because you made like the paddle pop sticks and you make stuff and they're so much fun. They are really fun.

And the one that I've got now, it looks like a drill. Like it's a bosh. Like it's very, it's very, because the ecosystem, obviously. Obviously. Mel said recently a friend and I were doing a project and I knew we would require lots of hot glue gunning. So it justified my purchase. It's the best thing in the world and I love it. That is a you love to see it.

But the next part is what I really liked. Mel said, I said to my partner while using it, guess who influenced this purchase? And he isn't a tapper. What a loser. Says Mel. Says Mel. Said, oh, probably Tony.

Yeah. And Mel said. You're fucking right. It is. And Mel said, how did you know him? He goes, I just know what you like. I love to see that. Imagine knowing that Mel and I are that close in personality that he just is like,

probably Tony. You're a hot glue gun. glu influencer. Yes. A hot gluencer. I'm a hot glue slut. Sorry. Slop for the hot glue.

And I am too. Yeah. So she said thanks for influencing my purchase. I feel like a tradie. Did she use the code, Tony Twain? There was no code. I don't even know what model it was.

But it is a great purchase if you're a hot glue enthusiast like Ryan. I love hot glue. That is the one that I've got. That does look like a drill. Yeah. To put it for me for my birthday. I love it. Is that a battery pack that it sits in?

Yep. Yeah. It's cordless. Amazing. Yep. Yeah. Because a cord, the cord hot glue,

it like gets stuck in everything. You're trying to do art and it's pulling you to the side. Yeah. Yes, it is. Dude. Oh, no, you're all over it. And thank you for supporting me and my Evers and also Mel's.

How old till Mabel can like, because we love arts and crafts. I know. I just think they, it does get hot. Like, I've had a, I've had some burns from.

Fully sick. I've had some miscar. to Burns. Now, I have had my fair share of hot glue injuries. One of my favorite ones was sticking my fingers together like this. Yeah. And then you got to try and pull it apart and like go, yeah.

But when it's, then when it goes cold, it just like peels up. It's so satisfying. Yeah. So it's like a harmless crime. Yeah. I keep getting like sponsored videos for like making Ublec and like,

um, what's that? What's Ublec? Like slime and stuff. Oh yeah. I just keep getting all these like kids science videos about like making ooblake. Send them over. I love it so much.

I just think it's so fucking cool. My love to see this from Alicia Gentry. Hi Alicia. I love that this hot fun garbage podcast was my waiting room company during my son's fifth open heart surgery. Holy shit. So Alicia and family have been really gone through it. It's been an extremely difficult time. He's been transferred to.

the heart failure and transplant team, so he's like really going through it. But the son, 16 years, he's already been under the fifth time. But he's doing really, really well now. And every time she's in the waiting room, because imagine you're in the waiting room and they're like, you don't know how long it's going to be,

you just have to sit there. And listening to the Tony and Ryan podcast gives her a smile, takes her mind off her for a little bit, bit of a brain break. And that is literally the whole point of this. So Alicia, I'm glad to hear that it's going well, all the best. I'm so sorry, Alicia, that is on this episode.

Oh, it's been absolute train wreck. This has been a terrible episode. It's been shocking. I feel so guilty. What happened on? Well, I, I fucked a bunch of stuff up. The jury-duty stuff up. Yeah.

And then we talked about a little mix for like 20 minutes. Did we? Was that today? That's today. The last three weeks were just the blur in my brain. Yeah. I don't remember anything. Yeah.

That's. I don't remember anything. I'm worried. I am really sorry. Was it like fun and silly and bad or was it just bad? I think it was fun silly. Slate. I'll take that.

What day is it? It's Wednesday. No. Yeah. Wednesday. Have we done it to Nella and Riano yet? Yeah. KFC loved it.

Big success. Really? Great success. Bora. Fuck. The last three weeks. I've just done a boreide impression. Like we need to leave.

Whoa. Like it's too much. How bad could it have gone. Do you know the other thing that we talked about today? What? The fucking Portalo. Lou. The Port of Lua. That was today. The Mountain Jew and the seven up.

The strangle hold on straight men. Yeah. Oh, God. Remember what I tried to say that 15 times? Yeah. So does everyone else. Sorry, everyone. I'm really sorry. I'm just trying my best to give you a brain break. And we've taken one ourselves.

Love you. My brain has broken away from the rest of my body. I hope that, like, it's the thought that counts. And we love you so much and we hope that you enjoyed the episode. And, um, sorry. And I don't promise tomorrow will be any better. Yeah. Love you.

If it happens. You know what? Even if there is an episode, no-k-it's going to listen. What's the point? Next Monday though, you know? Oh, we'll be fucking ready. Probably. Maybe.

Inside thought. All right. Love you. Slay the day. Bitch. Love you. Bye.