Toni and Ryan - Hypothetical Baby Names

Episode Date: August 24, 2021

So it seems our sexual chemistry has reached through the phone and some people are confused - don't worry - so are we. Toni and Ryan chat being open about poops and some feedback we need to address. Love ya! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello? Hi, is that Julie? Yes. Hey, it's Ryan, John and Tony Lodge. I know you might be at work at the moment, but I was just wondering if you had a spare minute. Yes, I do. All right.

Hello. How are you? Good. How are you guys? Good. We're good. So we're just about to jump into recording this podcast, but we thought before we did,

we just wanted to get your approval if that was okay. Yeah, that's fine. That's fine? I guess. Hey, this is JJ and I approve this podcast. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. Come get me. Yeah, yeah. There's a man's heart for me. Yeah, yeah. If there's one thing I want people listening to Tony and Ryan to understand is that Tony sings a lot. I sing all the time. For people that don't know, because a lot of people know you

as Tony Roddy from Jason Peejay, why were you called that? Because I used to be an opera singer. Now, I'm waiting for a punchline, but there is one, because that's just a true fact. That's actually real, yeah. Unfortunately, it's kind of like a dumb thing. Do you know when people say that they can sing, it's like a weird flex?

Yeah, and that's why when people are like, oh, can you sing? I'm like, no, yes, I do. Especially opera, you haven't been using it, so you might be losing it. You need a warm-up. You can't just on-demand belt out a few lines. No, no, no, no. And also anybody that knows anything about opera,

it's actually quite dangerous to just do it because you can hurt yourself. Dangerous? You can hurt yourself, yeah. What, pull a hamstring? Yeah, but it's the throat string. Welcome to Tony and Ryan. That's episode number two. If you're hearing this, you probably tolerated episode one

and thought you'd come back for more. So we really do appreciate that. That makes me really happy. Do you reckon that there's many people hitting play on this? Well, if they're listening now, they have. They have. And if they haven't, then they haven't heard this conversation. Do you reckon that's a lot?

100% of people of hearing this are listening. Hitting play. That's great. That's actually great numbers. What a conversion. 100%. Send that to the brand deal. Hey, Tony. Yes. How far in advance do you reckon people start thinking about baby names? I think you're one of two. Right. I think you're someone that decided that you want to call your daughter Emma when you were 12. And I think that you're someone who the baby comes out and you go,

yeah, she's an Emma. Yeah, well, for you listening right now, the person who pushed play, thank you. Yeah, thank you. Have a think. Are you the type of person that maybe you've already got children and you had that name booked in since you were 12 years old or did you just think the day before, oh, they look like a Carl.

It feels like a Carl. Yeah. So don't let me put words in your mouth, but am I right in thinking for children, for Tony is somewhere between 10 years into the future and never and just like the most distant thought ever? We actually don't want children. So a very long time. Yeah.

So, well, I mean, we've talked about it a lot of times. Very early on in our relationship, so Torbs and I have been together for like eight years. Yeah. And very early on in our relationship, it was actually the day we moved in together. Oh, my God, no pressure. I said, and also too late.

Like we've just moved in together. Oh, by the way, I'm really into this hardcore religion, yeah? Yeah, yeah. Oh, well, you've already moved in. Like we've paid our bond. It's too late. The day actually we moved in together, it kind of came up organically and I said, I actually don't think I'm ever going to want children.

And I said, if that is a problem for you, then maybe it's something we need to talk about. Literally yesterday. Yeah, before we signed the lease. And Torb's actually said, I would rather have you than a child because he's really lovely. Yeah, beautiful. So because he kind of was like, yeah, I'll have kids because that's just what really lovely. Yeah, beautiful. So because he kind of was like, yeah, I'll have kids

because that's just what you do. What you do. And I said, I don't know if I'm ever going to want that and if that's something you want, I would never take that away from you. And he said, I would rather have you than have children. And every couple of years we have a bit of a check-in. Yep. I'm kind of like, oh.

We're still not doing that, right? It looks like a lot of hard work. Yeah, like is this something that we want now or whatever, especially now that we're getting older? And it's still kind of like, oh, we're still not doing that, right? It looks like a lot of hard work. Yeah, like is this something that we want now or whatever, especially now that we're getting older and it's still kind of a no. We love kids. We love spending time with mates that have got kids, like one of my best mates, Jase, he's got kids. We love hanging out with the kids.

But, yeah, it's just not for us. So even though you're not planning on having kids ever, have you still thought about your baby's name? I think about it all the time. So what have you got? So I really love the name Lola or Lily. Oh, that's cute. Yeah, which is like a pretty girl name.

Yeah, yeah. I also really, oh, Torbs once said that he liked the name Egwene. I know. It's like, what is it, a frog? Like we're not calling a child Egwene. It sounds like a, what's the food that's like that? An aubergine. It sounds like an asking for D.

Would you like some aqueen tonight? Aegween. Oh, sorry, my mistake. Yeah, please get the disgusting answer right. Sorry if your name's aegween. Have you got your names picked out? Because I know that, well, I know Bridget quite well, your wife, and I know that she is like pretty keen on babes.

We want babies. So a long time ago I decided that we were having twin boys and they were going to be called Larry and Gary, Laz and Gaz, the Bash Bros. Bridget is as responsive to those names as you are now, which is nice. Larry and Gary. But we do like the name Matilda and we've got a few other like,

yeah, like pretty kind of girl names. I like Matilda because I really like Tilly. Yeah, same. You know when you think about a name, you've got to think about what the nickname's going to be. What the nickname could be and also how they could get bullied. And I think people should think about this more often. People need to think about this. So I've got a list here, Tony, from Perth Now, our old hood of Perth.

Old hood, yep. Perth Now released a list here, Tony, from Perth Now, our old hood of Perth. Perth Now released a list of the most female Bogan names of 2021. And for me, it's not just the names themselves, it's the spelling of the names. So if you're the kind of person who is pondering baby names, regardless or not, if you're having a baby soon, you don't want to end up on this list. No, and how embarrassing. And again, think of the kid. Don't think about how cool it is for your Instagram cred. That kid is going to get bullied its whole life

because you wanted some cred on the day it was born for you. Welcome to the world. Yeah. Iguana. Iguana. You know what I've seen a lot of recently? You know, like Khaleesi's from, you know, the Game of Thrones. So, again, the most bogan baby names for females.

And if this goes well this week, hey, maybe we'll do males next week because Perth now have got plenty of high-class content coming out. Yeah, great. Wednesday. Yeah. Like the day. I like. Spelt.

Yeah. W-E-D N-E-Z D-A-I See, I don't mind the name Wednesday because I really like the Addams Family. Oh, right. You know how, yeah, Christina Ricci.

Yeah. But spelt like that is think of the child. Think of the child. And the rest of their life, every time they fill out a form. Oh, so it's just double. No, it's with a Z and an I. Yeah.

I get that a lot with Tony, even though the normal way to spell Tony for a girl. A female is with an I. Is with an I. I get that a lot. Really? Yeah. I also got in high school because it was a very unfortunate time for me because The Simpsons was very popular. And I don't know if you remember a certain mob boss

from The Simpsons called Fat Tony. And a chubby person and was chubby at school, chubby my whole life. And the boys thought, Fat Tony. So I got that a lot, which was horrible. That is horrible. And, I mean, we can't predict what TV shows are going to be doing, but just think about it, please.

Don't call someone Fat Tony. Yeah, I mean, also don't predict what TV shows are going to be doing, but just think about it, please. Don't call someone Fat Tony. Yeah, I mean, also don't do that. Yeah. A family wanted a bit of a twist on the name Regina. Regina. Regina. Like Regina George from Mean Girls. Yeah.

And so they wanted to replace the R with a V and it would be Virginia was the new name they named her. It's spelt, and write this down for everyone playing along at home, V-A-G-I-N-A. So it's Vagina. That is someone in Perth has that name. Vagina is how you pronounce it, but for their whole life on their passport, on their driver's licence,

every time they go to a nightclub and have to show ID. Hi, I'm Vagina Smith. Vagina. How on God's green earth are you doing that to someone? At what point, Tony Lodge, judge, jury and executioner of modern society... Mm-hm, it's true. ..does someone step in and and say this is child abuse? Well, there are actually names that are illegal.

So I remember reading this article, must have been early last year, that, you know, names like COVID and corona and stuff are all banned. Well, there was this lady who in Canberra, I used to host the Ryan and Tanya show, and this lady called in one day and she said, I named my daughter Isis, which when she was born seven years ago was just like a pretty name that it means something.

And she's like, and now Isis is like this terrorism organization. And she, at age eight, had to change the name because she's like, I can't live with this. Yeah. We just got to change it and move on. But how horrible. What do you change it to? Iris's like, I can't live with this. Yeah. We've just got to change it and move on. But how horrible. What do you change it to, Iris? Steve? I don't know.

Next name is Trinity. Oh, I actually don't mind the name Trinity. Spelt T-R-Y-N-Y-T-Y. Try night, I. Try night, I. Try not I. There's three Ys in that and no other vowels. Stay at home, mate. Okay.

All right. That's weird, isn't it? I've talked to my, so my boyfriend, his name is Torbs. Yep. His name is Alex. Yep. Don't you think that the letter X is the most hectic letter to be in a name? Is that why he goes by Torbs and not Alex?

No. Because who dares have an X in his name walking along the street like a supposedly common man? Don't you reckon that that's like a really hectic letter to have in a first name? Sure. I just think that that's crazy. It's like a crazy letter.

Like on the scale of the alphabet. You chose an X. Who are you? The letters get crazier. So like the alphabet, no. A, plain missionary vanilla. It is. X, wildcard.

Okay, and then you get all the way down, right, to your X and your Ys and your Zs. Yep. Starts getting wild. Z, you know, Zoe, very common name. But Z is like a hectic letter to have in a name. Do you reckon anyone's got multiple letters from the back end or a back end only name?

Wix, xylophone, zigzag, zoo, zebra. No, Connor. Next name. Someone in Mandurah called their daughter, and this is one word, summer breeze. Summer breeze. One word. It's not like two words or a hyphen or the middle name was breeze. One word, Summer Breeze. Summer Breeze. One word. It's not like two words or a hyphen or the middle name was Breeze.

One word, Summer Breeze is her first name. I like the name Summer though. Love the name Summer. But you have to be a certain type of person to have the name Summer, don't you think? Like imagine if I was called Summer. I'm so not a Summer. You're a harsh, cold winter.

Oh. Hey, you're listening to Tony and Ryan. As women, our life stages come with unique risk factors, like when our estrogen levels drop during menopause, causing the risk of heart disease to go up. Know your risks. Visit heartandstroke.ca. Property market's insane at the moment, right?

Okay, mate. You know that I can't relate to this. Surely someone listening can appreciate with me that trying to buy a house in melbourne or sydney at the moment is borderline impossible the prices are going up faster than we can save i think that most people can appreciate that because most people most young people's like big money goal is to buy a house. So Bridget and I got married earlier this year. Congratulations. Thank you. Very exciting. We want to buy our like forever house that we can fall in love with,

make it our own, have babies in and live there for the next 50 years. Like we want to just, it doesn't have to be nice or fancy. We just want it to be ours and to really, you know, like it's cliche to be like put down some roots, but like we want it to be ours and just. Have that thing. Not to be a house, for it to be our home, as cliché as that sounds.

So most inspections, Saturday morning, open house, come check it out, go and have a look. The most millennial thing someone can do on a Saturday morning is go to a cafe, have a coffee, have some avo on toast, some Megs Benedict. Cool. And then go to an auction or go and look at a house. Yep.

So I've had like three flat whites in a cafe. Yep. Then we're going to an open for inspection. Yep. Are you allowed to use the bathroom at an open home? No. You can't. It's like the toilets in Ikea. What do you mean it's like bathroom at an open home? No. You can't. It's like the toilets in Ikea.

What do you mean it's like the toilets in Ikea? You know how like through Ikea there's like the display toilets and it says like, please don't use this. Oh, I thought you meant like the actual bathroom's off to the side. I'm pretty sure I have done that. Oh. No, you can't. So I've had a few coffees and it wasn't.

So you're ready to number two. Yeah, and it went from, and sorry, we'll do the non-graphic version of the story, but like it's not really a choice at this matter. It's just one of those. It's going to happen. Yeah, Christmas is coming. Yeah, and of course I'm like,

I shouldn't have had that coffee. There's always people. And then it's the sort of dance I did of trying to seem like an interested buyer but also acquiring the information I was after. So I went, oh, so there's a main bathroom. Is there an ensuite? I'm like, oh, yes, there is. Let me tell you about the features of the bathroom.

I'll go look at myself. Does the lock work? And I did. I did a number two. You pooed in an open house. Yeah. And I felt really bad because people, you can't just like sneak off and like, oh, my friends are in the lounge.

They're not like hanging out in the bathroom with me. Like when you go to an open house, you go to the bathroom. Oh, there's a bathroom in the toilet in the bathroom. You know, see if the taps work. You do all the things. People are in and out. And it was a busy open house, you go to the bathroom. Oh, there's a bathroom in the toilet in the bathroom. You know, see if the taps work. You do all the things. People are in and out. And it was a busy open house. There were probably four or five other couples, so ten or so people,

a few real estate agents, and not a big house. We've been looking in some like inner suburbs. So they're not these like expansive whatever. And I like locked the door. That's the thing. You also don't ever shut a door in an open, like when you're walking through, you try the tap or whatever. You don't close the door behind you.

You don't need private time in the bathroom while you're looking at a house unless you've had too many flat lights in the morning. Do you think I should have asked or should I have just done it and ducked out as I did? Do you feel like you need to decide whether you do actually want to buy or rent the house before making a commitment? Hey, Bridge decide whether you do actually want to buy or rent the house before making a commitment? Hey, Bridge, we're definitely not going to buy this one, right? Great. Cool. Shut the door, mate. Stand there. No, no, no. Because if you don't mind

not making a good impression with the realtor, then you're probably just going to be like, do you mind if I just pop into the loo? But if you're really keen, then you have to be a bit more cool about it. And you can't then say like, I'm about to shit myself and I really need to go to the bathroom. Hey mate, you've got a choice here. I'm about to shit myself. However, I am maybe going to give you a lot of money. This is cool, right? Or I'm not interested in this house at all, but I do really need to use the bathroom. So it's awkward, isn't it? And you have to make that decision so quickly.

The thing that was more awkward, and again, I'm trying to be polite for people who are listening to our podcast is, how do I phrase this? Even after it had happened, I feel like anyone else who was continuing the tour of the house would be very aware that it had happened. Like to the point where... I mean, all that milk. I mean, it was bound to be a stinky one. But how would you feel if you were at an open home

and you walked into the bathroom and you're like, someone is clearly just chatting. So I'd probably look at my boyfriend, Torbs, and go, someone's done exactly what we wouldn't have the guts to do Well, good on them Yeah, I mean you've got to go when you've got to go I said to Bridget, it's time to leave And she just went, why am I

But again, when your partner goes, we've got to go You just go, okay And then we got like out around the corner And she goes, you didn't. You didn't. And I was like, I did. But you and your wife, Bridget, you don't really do poo chat, do you? She's never pooed.

Yeah. I have. We do poo chat about me. Yeah. But there's nothing to chat about because she doesn't. She doesn't poo. Yeah. See, I even, so this morning you came and picked me up.

And what was the first thing that I told you about when... I'm not going to repeat it. Okay. But the fact that you said that and I know what you're talking about, I feel like everyone can just make some assumptions. Yeah. That Tony and I are quite open and close friends. Yeah. And also...

Closer than my wife and I would appear. And my boyfriend and I are super open about that. So when people tell me that they're, you know, quite private with their partners about that, I just think how can you- If you're estranged. Yeah. How can you live like that? How can you hold all your farts in?

How can you not talk about being like, oh, we've eaten too many dumplings, like I'm going to shit myself? Okay, you're hearing most of the story from this morning that I wasn't going to report. I'm actually, I would like to extend my congratulations and I'm very proud of you for doing it because there's not a lot of people that probably would have. But are you going to buy this?

No, no, couldn't afford it. And like I said, I decided that I wasn't going to buy it before I. Yeah. Instead of dropping off a deposit, I dropped off. Oh, that's so much worse than anything I would have said. A deposit on the house. Oh, I thought it was a poo joke. I thought you were saying I dropped something else off.

Sorry, I'm sorry. I didn't know. Thank you very much for listening to the Tony and Ryan podcast, by the way. If you made it through all of that. Yeah, I know. I mean, I should have said the thanks at the start. Go and bomb up Tony on Instagram if you haven't already. Go and follow her.

Oh, thanks. We'd usually like try and sell, you know, in podcasts, like I'll go buy my book. We don't have anything. Oh, we don't have a book. So just follow us on Instagram and say thanks for listening. That's enough. Speaking of the people in the Tony and Ryan group

and Instagram followers, I have been sent some messages that I thought, like some feedback. Already? Yeah. That's not good. No, I think it's good. They're just like curious. It's not like harsh, like, oh, hey, guys, here's my notes.

Okay, good. We haven't had an air check. I mean, send those through if you've got them. Yeah. Charlotte says. Hi, Charlotte. I love the pick-up line videos on TikTok and Instagram, which have been seen by a lot of people but are you guys actually dating for real though are you married are you colleagues

friends each other's side hoes what actually is this oh ask charlotte people are curious about our relationship which i think she brings up a good point because do you reckon what are we if you have to ask i mean um no that's really interesting i wouldn't have thought that anybody would have thought i mean first of all i see just a lot of tiktok comments that are like oh he's so hot he's so dreamy and a guy yeah i do and a guy that i used to work with actually was like, oh, we've all got a crush on Ryan here. We all think he's real. Are we reading the same comments?

No. I mean, keep him coming. Don't get me wrong. But people are saying that you're really hot. Gas me up. Please, more. So people are like thinking that you're really good looking and everybody just says that my hair is shit.

So I feel like people already know that the answer is we're not together because we aren't even playing the same game, let alone on the same page. Hey, it would be an honour and a privilege. Oh, no. But I can't believe that people have actually asked that. So we're dating. So the answer to your question is it's on.

It's funny, I don't think we've mentioned it on the podcast, but I have said to some people that Bridget is my real wife and Tony is my real's wife. Yeah. Two Es. Two Es, yeah. I don't have the diamond. Bridget has the diamond.

Yeah. Good for her. Would you like a diamond? Not from you. From Torbs? I know that we will get married, so I don't really care about it. That was my attitude with Bridget. Like, we were together, boyfriend and girlfriend, for ages.

And they're like, oh, are you going to lock it down? I was like, I feel like we're going to be together forever anyway. It's just a formality. I don't care. Turns out Bridget didn't share that belief. She was a bit like, hey, if it is forever. Yeah, I'd like the diamond. Yeah. So I would marry

Torbs tomorrow in what I'm wearing now. Like, I don't really care about... In those shoes? Yeah, in this. She must love him. He must love me more. But I don't really care about all the stuff. Like, obviously, I just really want to get married.

But I don't really care about when it is. I just want to be married. I don't really care about when it is I just want to be married You guys have been together forever Yeah, he's really keen on the wedding He's keen on the stuff and partying with a lot of our friends which I really love and super respect

Good luck having a wedding any time in the next five years I was like, it's a great excuse to not invite anybody save a bit of money That's what we did, Bridget and I got married with just the two of us next five years with people over. Yeah, I was like, it's a great excuse to not invite anybody, save a bit of money. Well, that's what we did. Bridget and I got married with just the two of us. Yeah.

And then we went out and had dinner with six others. Yeah, I love that, though. All the photos and all the stories from your wedding are really lovely. Yeah, and like everyone else says, we'll have a party later. Yeah, I don't even think you need to. So much time has gone past, we don't care. By that time, you'd be bloody married for ten years. Yeah. Bloody married for 10 years.

Bloody married for 10 years. Jeremy says, I'm loving that you guys are actually launching the podcast. I've loved Tony Roddy for a long time and I've seen the clips and like a lot of people have said, oh, is this happening a thing? But he said, why did you decide to do it now? And my answer, actually, well, do you want to go first? I've got an answer. Well, what does that mean?

Why are you doing it now? Well, why not two months ago while, like, I mean, just like he's pumped for it, but he's like, oh, is there a reason why now and not any other time? Oh, well, what's your answer? My answer is OnlyFans has decided to stop doing adult content so we need to make money some other way. We need to really, like really bulk up the bank account.

I actually don't really have an answer. I mean, it's just been the right time. I don't know. Well, we. I mean, we got a great deal, didn't we? Doing okay. Yeah. Thank you very much, iHeartRadio.

iHeartThem. Yeah. iHeart. My bank account. My bloody bank account. Well, actually, Tony wanted to record some demos. And I remember saying, like, well, actually tony wanted to like record some demos and i remember saying like well if we're going to record the audio we might as well record the video yeah and if we're going to record the video we might as well put it where someone can watch it yeah

and that's my blueprint for anyone else who wants to do anything just do a couple of versions and uh it's a lot easier to get someone like i had on board when you they go oh we don't really care and you go oh so uh this little snippet got a few million views. And they go, okay, here's what we'll do. That seems all right. I've got a question for you then. Did you think that the videos that we posted, which have gone pretty well on TikTok, pretty well on Instagram Reels,

hopefully that's where people are coming from, that's why they're listening. Did you expect that they would go as well as they did? No. Like did you have that faith in us at that point? It's not that I thought it was bad or not funny, but I just, like we were texting each other. You can't predict it, right?

And just the extent of it. Yeah. I was like, I thought it was pretty funny, but to be, for what happened, the numbers is quite astonishing. I think so too. And it's really weird to me. I'd love to say as like an ego guy who like knows his way around digital, oh, I planned it all and I thought it was this and I'm obviously

the funniest guy alive and of course it did. But like no, that's not the case. Yeah, there was no strategy. Honestly, we just gave it a shot. So if you want to give it a shot, you should. But I love doing this with you. I think it's really fun. Thank you.

I hope other people like it too. The next comment is... I was just going back to the, what are you guys? And you're like, I'm just here for work. Like when you say like, oh yeah, my friend from work. And they're like, well, no. Colleagues. When you're like, I love doing this with you. I'm like, I'm just here for the cash.

Yeah. Oh God. We must be on different contracts. I do love coming in here as well. Oh, yeah, great. Nicole says, Ryan, what is it like working with the funniest person alive? Well, great question, Nicole. Tony, what is it like? Oh, very funny.

But, and I might need to get some music prepared for this. We were just talking about the socials. My socials have received a bit of a boost because of our videos, and the reality is that the videos have done well because Tony is really funny in them. No, no. So I think you've earned the right to sing a line from this Kanye West song.

I ain't saying she a gold digger. Nope. Nope. No one man should have all that power. I feel like me and Taylor might still have sex. Why, I made that bitch famous. God damn. I made that bitch famous.

For all the girls that get dicked from Kanye West. We'll probably have to say that next line now. To be honest, I feel the other way around, though. I mean, obviously I just slayed that set up of me knowing the song and all of that, but I actually feel like it's the opposite. I mean, obviously, I just slayed that set up of me knowing the song and all of that. But I actually feel like it's the opposite. You are a real-life celebrity. Celebrity.

Celebrity. I've made it now, folks. I'm a celebrity. Yep, it's true. Hey, thank you very much for listening to episode two of Tony and Ryan. Go and leave us a review. Yeah, if you want to. It can be good or bad. Or don't a review. Yeah, if you want to.

It can be good or bad. Or don't. Don't let me tell you how to live your life. Yeah, but it can be good or bad. We don't mind. Preferably good. Preferably good. But thanks for listening.

We'll be back next Monday. Sure. What day is it today? Wednesday? Yeah. Sure. We know our schedule. See you next Monday. Bye.