Toni and Ryan - "I Cheated on My Pregnant Wife With Our Family Doctor"

Episode Date: January 26, 2026

Stain removal - Crazy Instagram story - Pet sitting update - love ya!!!!!Original Video - https://www.instagram.com/p/DS_HovuETUR/Sign up to Patreon Here - www.patreon.com/ToniandRyanFAQ and T&C's PODCASTAWAY - www.toniandryan.com.au/podcastawayVideo for this EP is available on YOUTUBECheck out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toniandryanpodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Approximately five months after I admitted to my wife that I had had an affair with another man and that I am gay, the time for the birth of our daughter was finally here. The man with whom I had had the affair, Matt, who was also an OBGYN, was set to perform the delivery all of my wife's request. What the fuck? Can I just read a few comments? Of all the times to use the Rio Dictionero field time. Hi, I'm Sam from Pullman, Washington.

Hi, I'm Noah from Ontario, Canada. Hi, I'm Cassie from Melbourne and I approve this podcast. Welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast. My name is Ryan. This is Dr. Author Tony Lodge. Thanks, Josh. You know how in some workplaces you have to be like sort of professional and pretend to be a bit? Well, what I was going to say is when you're listening to our show, when you're a part of the type community, when you are Tony Lodge, you don't have to do that here.

You can be the was-up girl you were born to be. Waza! Now, yesterday I... Oh, sorry, it's shoe spraying week. I was almost... This week, we're highlighting the importance of spraying your shoes. With what? What is the stuff he spray on it?

Scotch guard. Scotch guard. Yeah. So you can't spill your scotch on your shoes, see. Oh, it's for? No. I don't think so. Well, today I'm wearing a new Birkenstock.

Yeah. It is a torp. Is that the color that we're... Yeah, sure. It is the traditional clog, Birkenstock. The Boston, for those playing along the home. And I can wear it out in public now because it has been sprayed. Yeah.

Spray your suede. Now, over the weekend, I was wearing these and Mabel and I were in the park. And she goes, dad, I need to a wee. Yep. And I've gone, thank you so much for telling me. Yep, love it, bitch. There's no bathrooms here. And she goes, we'll do a bushway.

Love it. So I carried her over to the bush and I fucked it up. I had all the wrong angles. Downwind. All the fucking wrong. I fucked it right upwind. Upwind, actually. Because as she'd bushweed, it ended up on my Birkenstocks.

You're joking. Yeah. Was that pre-spray or post-spray? Because I wouldn't wear them unsprayed. Because I'm not a fucking psychopath. So true. And they went on there and I went, no. And then I went.

don't worry about it the year of smug is back all good and then mabel actually said don't worry mom sorry don't worry dad mom will get it out she is the stain queen my wife she can get anything like she is such a genius yeah there's been time i've messaged bridge and being like how do you reckon you'd go about a spaghetti sauce on a lace top and things like that and she never judges me for the weird scenario no yeah she's in some some um like the only um like the only only thing they talk about in these Facebook groups is like strategies of stain removal. Well, you know how I mean that are mums who clean Facebook group? They're the same. Yeah, they're great. So great. For some of the stuff like you, I saw one the other day actually

that like took my breath away. This woman had bought a Terry toweling material. Took my breath away. You just wait. Bought a Terry toweling dress for her daughter. So it was like a like a little kid's dress. But in that, you know that towel material? And, And it had like in texture, like sample written across it. Because it was obviously one that they tried. It didn't work out whatever. And they've donated it. She bought it from the op shop.

And she goes, how can I get permanent Sharpie out of this dress? And you should have seen the comments. Clear nail polish. Spray some hair spray on it and then scratch it out with your fingernails. Toothpaste and toothbrush. Like there's all of these different things. And then at the bottom, this girl has gone, update. This is what I tried.

And it was gone. Like, and I just think, fuck me. I think... The person who probably donated it in the first place was like, well, I can't get that out. Yeah. There is... Who's discovered that the toothpaste will get the Sharpie out of the Terry Toweling little outfit for your daughter? Were they held desperate or just smart?

No, that's what... But like, yeah, when you go, we'll try anything, I go, well, who thought to put Barkeeper's friend on a fucking high-heel shoe? I feel like they're just common. things that I see on there. Or, oh, like, my husband's a tradie. How do you get the grease out of this thing? And they go, oh, well, if you put that out in the sun for two minutes and then you spray that with fucking lemon juice, fuck shit, come out out.

And I go, wonderful. Mums can do anything. Mums on the internet are probably the most special group of people on this planet. You know what we've done with mums? We've let them cook. They've really come into their own, haven't they, mums? I just think that... I get the saying, but it's also probably not the saying.

Oh my God, that's... Okay. Okay, nah. I want to take that bad. You know what women should do? Cook? Let them cook. Okay, no, I meant that in the, like, hot cultural way.

Like, I'm... Like, we let them pop the fuck off. You know what I mean? I get it. Please, I suppose that as a real... Because out of context... Um, it's already out. Um, so let mum's cook, but in the hot way.

Um, I think that my... Mums are really just like, mums can do fucking anything. And I absolutely love it. Yeah. If they want to. I empower all women in every way. And hello to you in the comment section on YouTube today. I'm fucked.

Pleasure to have you. Might not be back tomorrow. This might be it. Thanks for being part of shoe spraying week. Now, everyone, if you're at the gym. Yep. Listening to us on a podcast and you're doing like, you're on the stairmaster, I'd pause that for a second.

Oh, very oddly specific. If you're driving. I've never done the stairmaster. But have you seen people on TikTok that are on there for like an hour and a half? It's fucked. They're fucked. If you can do two. I can't even get the fucking up the stairs at work. I know.

I work here. I think to take that back and say, I know because same. Because I work here. Oh, I thought it was up. Because this morning, I don't know if you guys noticed, but I brought in a bunch of rubbish this morning. We knew. from my house.

We saw. And then, because I'd hauled ass, getting all the rubbish out of my car and then into the bid. I got up to the top of stairs. I was like, ah! Yeah.

It's tough. It's tough up here. It is. Tower. How many floors do you reckon that is? What the fuck was I talking about? Don't know. If you're at the gym on the stairmaster,

pause it. If you're listening to us whilst driving. What me? Cook. And you're like busy in traffic and just like, just stick to the left in the slow. Just like. Okay.

Would you? you say pull over? No, but like, but like, don't be doing some crazy traffic maneuvers when you hear this because you're going to have to like, you're going to, we're all going to black out a little bit. Okay. Leave the three-car gap for sure. Yeah.

If you're watching on YouTube on the TV. For you, Ryan, that's when you don't drive right behind the person in front of you. Oh. For you, Charles, that's when you don't drive right behind the person in front of you. And you accuse me of throwing back as well. Hey, mate, just because the internet's on you, let's struggle together. Yeah, so true. Not to struggle at one another.

Yeah, no, so true. Yeah, we're on it. We're a team. Is there anything you'd like to take back? Nah. I can't take that back because it's. But if you, we were driving in heavy traffic the other day. And if you do, by default, end up close to the car in front of you.

And if the lights go on orange and you're trying to fucking my way to the next round, you fucking... I'm not redacting a thing. Show me. Play the video. Play the video. Approximately five months after I admitted to my wife that I had had an affair with another man

and that I am gay, the time for the birth of our daughter was finally here. The man with whom I had the affair, Matt, who was also an OBGYN, was set to perform the delivery with my wife's request. Once he had made the necessary arrangements to ensure that he had coverage

in the event of a medical emergency, We were ready for the delivery. And in that room where my wife, me, Matt, two nurses, and one of his medical partners, again, who was there in the event of some sort of medical emergency. And on that day, at 10.20 p.m., Ella Grace was born. I cut the umbilical cord, and an entire new chapter that would forever change each of our lives officially began. Have you ever watched that shy modern family? Like, sounds a little bit like, oh, yeah.

Hang on. If you had a, I need to give you a slightly more context. If you just had a baby, Tony, what would be the first thing you posted on Instagram? And would it maybe not be that? So, this is the announcement post. Fuck up. Fuck, fuck. This is the first thing of that.

What the fuck? Hang on. So he's married to a woman. Yep. Cheated on his wife with a man and has come out now as gay. Yep. Yeah. But it hasn't like broken up.

Like he's like no, but like yost do my wife. And she was pregnant. Yep. So, well, they were pregnant together and obviously planning on having like her family together. Um, and so then hang on. The guy he fucked. And not just like having an affair with.

Ongoing. Yeah. assume is the guy who's delivering the baby. Yeah. Because the wife requested it. She's like, we're all, hey, we're all a family here. You love him. So is that where, is that where we're going?

Is that the wife is like, well, then he should be here for it? He should be part of it. If he's been a major part of your life and this is a major part of our life, then like, that's what he does for a living. Like, bring him, bring Matt in. Let him cook. I regret everything that I said. Um, okay, hang about.

Okay, let me just, I might need a fucking lead pencil for this. So. We got a great comment section to get to. Oh, so true. Okay. So from like, so, okay, hang on, hang on. I've misunderstood. I thought she requested him to be the OBGYN.

because like she found out and the husband didn't know is how I've heard that. Are we sure that that's not what happened? I'm not sure of anything in this world anymore. Because imagine if you found out your husband was cheating on you and you go, well, I'm going to fucking set you up, you slimy bitch. Yeah. And bring your... Just when you least expect it, wheel him in.

Yeah. And bring your paramour in. Yeah. Is that not how you guys heard that? Sorry for saying paramour. So now Haley Williams is delivering a baby and... I know, yeah. They are in the business of misery, I reckon.

So true. That sounds awful. That's a great joke. Thank you. What's the song I like at the moment? Ain't it fun? Ain't it fun? No, no, sorry.

I don't know. The one, just... All I want him. Oh, that was actually really good. That was beautiful. Hang, I'm actually not going to be able to concentrate until I know this song. So fair. Right, he's only got six-liked songs, so I won't take long.

Oh, and you know what's coming up? Hard times. Hard times. When he gets you pregnant, then his lover is the Y-O-B-Givian. Hard times. So that's how I heard it, that she's set him up and being like... Let's watch it again. Because that's, yeah, you might be right.

New perspective. Approximately five months after I admitted to my wife that I had had an affair with another man, and that I am gay. The time for the birth of our daughter was finally... No, I don't think so, because he's admitted it to her. Man with whom I had the affair, Matt, who was also an OBGYN, was set to perform the delivery all at my wife's request. Once he had made the necessary arrangements to ensure that he had coverage in the event of a medical... Okay, I've said enough.

Yeah, fine, okay. So another quick one is that, and we've seen this in social media before, if you're getting on to do a bit of like an apology fucking tour, wouldn't you take it? the Rolex off. And we've seen this before in social media, but wouldn't you? Of all, yeah, but can I just read a few comments? Of all the times to use the Rio de Janeiro filter. That comment has 27,000 likes. And it deserves double that.

That is fucking hilarious. Yeah, it does have a, it does have a misty old timey feel, doesn't it? It's like they just shot their one. wanted photos for their Christmas card and they went, let's just leave that one off. I think there was a like... Sweetheart, do you know how to take the field drive? They go, nah. They go, does it look too much like our wanted Christmas card?

Also, nah, but that'll be fine. The new baby does a fake mug shot. Yeah. You could not waterboard this out of me. Nambiro comments, should we bring back private journals with a lock? Can you just play the first five seconds again, Charles? Approximately five months after I admitted to my wife that I had had an affair with another man. Great. Okay. Jeff comments, not even a story time to ease us in.

Bro goes straight into having the affair. He really does. No lude. And for people in marketing, Coulter Talks comments, now that is a hook. Um, Cajun Ventures. This comment's got 20,000 likes. Yeah. This is my own fault. I should have been asleep by now. Yeah, I should have called it a day.

I thought I'll just one more video, then I'll go to sleep, and I deserve what I got. So is he still with the wife? How's the baby? How's the husband? The boyfriend? Like, what's, do we, is there a part two? If you click on, and it also just looks like he's a gunpoint there.

Oh, yeah, he does. Yeah, 1,000. Someone commented, I didn't screen to them, but someone was sort of like, was your punishment for cheating being forced to make this video? Like, did your wife say, well, you have to share this with everyone? Charles, can you just go to put his Instagram up on the, um, click on his account? This is Matt. Hi, Matt. Oh, he's the guy.

This is the guy. Meet Matt. Yes, they, Matt joined me on Instagram live to answer some of your questions and help with our special announcement. Special announcement Oh, do you see that comment there? Enjoyed the live yesterday and can't wait for the podcast. It's all, it's fake. No, the podcast is the reality of their lives.

No, but surely this is all a ploy. Why can't our marketing team be as good as them? Hang on, scroll down just a little bit. Thank you. Stop. Thank you so much for sharing your story. It gives courage and confidence to others like me who are in a similar situation.

Are you? Is your wife also pregnant? And is your gay lover on the side also going to be the doctor delivering? Yeah, I don't actually think you're in the exact same situation. I'm going to, like, that's got to be one in a million a. Like, I just don't foresee. Oh. So were they together now?

It looks like. Jason and Matt. We'll have to listen to the podcast. They look like they're in Fiji. Did they do podcast? Wait. In 25 words or less, what's the first thing you would do in Fiji? I would hook up with the guy who delivered my baby.

Yeah. How is the mom going with the newborn at home and he's in fucking Fiji? Well, he looks pretty happy there. He's in Palm Beach. Have so much fun. Finally, a gorgeous photo and not a real. I love your sunglasses in joy. Are they not aware of what just happened?

Have they not? I'm so bad. video. Cheers, we all need to recharge. I'm actually going to fuck to stop you right there. Of all the people on earth that deserve a break, this is at the bottom of the list. Um, what is the, sorry, Charles, can you just go and look at the video after this? Like, is it a part two of, like, what's going on? Born, all was well, and she was ready for discharge after just a couple of extra days due to a bout of jaundice. However, as you might expect, many people were not happy. And an anonymous complaint was filed with the North Carolina Medical Board in which I was referred to as Matt's gay lover.

You are. Fortunately, the medical board conducted an investigation, which was basically that Matt had falsified a medical record, which was certainly not true. The medical board found no finding of fact. And the medical board did not enter any finding of wrongdoing. So this chapter was officially closed and we were ready to move on. Okay, I'm not ready to move on at all. Logistics chat here. There's a comment there from Dream Doc MD.

Under both professional ethics and board standards, a physician may not have a sexual or romantic relationship with a patient or patient's partner or surrogate during the course of care. That feels crazy to me. Because like if your husband was OB, you would want him to birth your baby, right? Like, well, I would. But also is Matt filming this video?

Who's filming it? That is a great question. Yeah. And then he goes, how was that? And he goes, babe, do you want to just redo the line, Matt's gay lover? Yeah. It just didn't really hit us half. Can you just, when you say that again, imagine that gay was in capital letters?

Yeah. Um, yeah, but I reckon, but I reckon if you're that, okay, so you're giving birth and I am your husband slash doctor. What a tell a novella. I reckon because of the attachment I have to you, it would cloud your professional judgment. So whilst you'd be there and be next bit, I'd still think you'd need like an independent like no. That's a really good point.

Yeah, so I reckon. You would maybe not make the same choices you would if it weren't your, like someone you loved. Yeah, or just if something goes wrong, you want like an unbiased like. Absolutely. Sort of, hey doc, just to confirm this is what we would do, No, that's a wonderful point.

And that's why... But I didn't know that you, like, legally couldn't. Well, are you... Dr. Tony Lodge? Are you implying that you haven't done... I'm not an OB. So true. Yeah.

Because if you were, you would have done your ethics training and your exams. I've done my hypocritical oath. Is that way you say oath in a really judgy manner? Oath. Fuck an oath, mate. This is absolutely crazy. I can't. Yeah. How many followers does you have? Like, is it really racking up? 15,000. Came out at, okay, this is his bio. Came out at 28, married the love of my life, proud dad, finally telling the stories I waited decades to tell. So this is all happened like many, many moons ago. No, I think a lot of this is happening in real time. Oh. The birth happened on the second of January this year. Yeah. Or that video was posted on the second of January. Sorry. Are you telling me that he's 20.

But this video, like, 22 years after coming out to my wife, this story is still resonated with so many. Nah, this is all the setup. It's not adding up for me. Detective Dunn should have been on to this. He's saying there's some crossing time lines. Sherlock Tones has picked up on this smith of trial. 22 years after coming out to my wife, the story is reading with some of it.

Click on that one. In 2003, I shared with my wife three things, that I had had an affair. It was with another man and that I am gay. at the time. Sorry, the top comment on this video. Please tell me you're watching hated right away. I'm not enough.

All right. We're done. We're done. Please tell you. I'm Sam from Pullman, Washington. Hi, I'm Noah from Ontario, Canada. I'm Cassie from Melbourne. And you're listening to Tony and Ryan.

I'm so fucking thrown by the video. I genuine lie. just really, who, um, probably much like that guy. We've got a Patreon. I'm sure he's done one.

Maybe some... Substack. Yeah. He does. We'll put a link below. Oh my God. Um, we upload... Hey, speak your truth.

Tell your story, bro. Yeah, I'm here for it. And I might have laughed at the Rio de Janeiro filter, but I am here for the updates. Yeah, and we're going to keep watching them and find out what's going on. Motherfucking knows how to tell a story. You know what I'm saying?

He could, kept it tied. Yeah. Yeah. And he kept me arms. You're hooked. Oh, he's got me. Yeah. We're coming out in Netflix in 2028.

That guy's story. 1000%. And it's kind of, did you ever watch that Tinder swindler? Yeah. I reckon it's cut like that, like quite dramatic and like, you know, there's all this money involved. And like, yeah. Back to our Patreon, though, if you don't mind. So we upload all of our additional BTS content.

We do live streams and stuff. A few of the people in our champion Tarpeteer, though, who might be coming with us to Fiji. So, tune for that. Hannah Smith, good on you, Hannah. Chloe, good child. Thanks, Chloe. Is she?

Good child. I hope she's a good adult as well. Darcy home. Good on you, Das. Lucy looks. That is a fun name. That is good, isn't it? Yeah.

Even Lucy is a fun name. I like the name Lucy. Yeah. Abby W, good on your Abby. Jenna Oskivarek. Osk Varek, sorry Jenna, Emily Miller, Emma's house, maybe Emma's inside as well, Lucy Hodnet, Polly Chow, Emily G, Anthony Andreiu, Gabby Fitzgerald and Georgia Gordon. Gordon, sorry.

Oh, I watched this video the other day of Gordon Ramsey. You're joking. See? It is. It's so good. Gordon Ramsey seeing his daughter, like the first look at his daughter on her wedding day. Yeah. And he's just like bawling and it's so beautiful.

I love Gordon Ramsey. I think he's a really good person. Really? Your team, G.R. Yeah. Sorry, do we wait too long to realize what Gordon Ramsey's initials were? I don't really know what happened then. You're really malfunctioned.

Anytime I hear Gordon Ramsey, I just think of the idiot sandwich meme and I just can't. Yeah. Like it just stops my brain in this track. Yeah. Now, we are going to Fiji at the end. of the year and every month a tarpa and their plus one is going to get a return ticket which I can confirm is not just the return leg it is both the flight there and back and put you up in a hotel with all of us we're all going to hang out together it's the last week to enter for

this month for this round 25 words or less tell us what's the first thing you would do in Fiji nice job on remembering the question I do recommend shoe spraying because you've got to the salt water Yeah, it rains a lot. Yeah, the sand. There's a lot going on. Spray your shoes. Yeah. Get sprang.

Patreon.com slash Tony and Ryan. Now, we mentioned that Tony babysit my daughter over the weekend. We all went away for the weekend. My wife and I went to a wedding. Aunt Tony dominated at babysitting. Thank you so much. Aunt Tony is the favourite aunt. Thank you.

So whilst Tony was away from her place, Charles stayed at Tony's to look after Tony's French bulldog. PIPA. Yeah. Now, some questions have arisen. Oh, yeah. From who? From me?

Charles has a question that he wasn't comfortable bringing up just the two of you, so he's asked me to bring it up. And TARPA Ethan Ramsdil has message to a question and said, I don't know if Tony's considered this. Okay. Would you like... Hang. All said and done now, so I can't change anything.

Well, Charles's question you could change, which we'll get to in a second. But first of all, Ethan said, will Pippa see Charles naked? And is this something you guys have talked about? Because my dog seen you naked. When I babysat BJ. He was how sheepish when he got home. No, he was not.

Fucking seen a ghost. Well, yesterday, Charles came round to my place. We were talking shit about something. That sounds really, anyway. What the fuck was going on? yesterday. Like, all above board. But anyway,

it doesn't sound like it. No, we just, is he delivering your baby? We just had a little barbecue for lunch. And, you know, anyway, it's all above board. One topage leads to another.

As Charles was leaving, he looks at Pip and he's like, bye Pip. And she was like, bye, Charles. And then, and then he goes, oh, isn't it weird

that Pip has seen both of us naked? So the answer for Ethan Ramstool, Tapa, Charles goes, I was having a shower and I went and she slept on the mat and he goes, yeah, I couldn't get her out. And I was like, yeah, she loves to protect you when you're in the shower. Like in the bathroom, but like on the bathroom. Like on the bathroom.

Like on the bathroom. Yeah. Just staring at you. Yeah. Not like that though. She just like, she's on guard because she's like, you're vulnerable right now. Like I'll keep, I'll take the first watch. And then Tony like left the GoPro on her like rolling as well.

Wow. Well, I did have to say to Charles, like, oh, how many drawers do you think you're going to go through? Like, should I move some stuff around? Where is my safe space to put the bad stuff? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Like, where's the place that we can agree? There's no rifling, you know?

Yeah. Where was that spot? We didn't decide. And then after, like, after I was like, oh, you know, because in my top drawer, he's like, I didn't look. And I was like, I would have. So if you did, it's fine. Would you? I think so.

I think so I don't know whether to respect the honesty or hate the answer I know and I don't yeah I think it would depend on who it was like say if I was house-sitting for a stranger no I don't think I would oh that's when you really go for it oh no I'd do it with a friend though

I wouldn't find out anything I don't already know you would we are not looking hard enough although your friends aren't fun enough you're the only person I know yeah if you said at my hat you'd find some stuff man oh oh okay Yeah. Question two.

Question two. When your dog Pippa stays with the regular, like, dog minder, that regular dog minder gets paid. Yep. So how much did you pay Charles? A baby Weber queue. I gave Charles a barbecue. Okay. But we did.

I gave you a barbecue and the stand and the full gas bottle. We did agree. like beforehand like a month ago about the barbecue and then the barbecue. I didn't know the barbecue is related to the dog sitting. Oh, so you were willing to just take the barbecue and not give me anything in return. Oh. Well, because you were like getting rid of it. You're witnessing Davo in real time.

What's the definite? Charles, can you Google Davo? No, we're not doing that. We. Everyone else Google Davo. It's when the villain becomes the victim switches roles. Can you actually Google Davo? It's how interesting.

I learnt from the best. Deny, attack, reverse victim and offender. Start finance podcast, that's right. Okay. So I said to Charles, actually, let's start from the beginning. Is this the switching? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Pippa had a great time.

She was very well looked after. Like, obviously, you did perfectly. And, like, he, like, had emptied the dishwasher and, like, taking the sheets back off the bed and stuff. Like, so it was like, you did amazing. Wait for the, wait for the bar. No, no, no. And I'm saying, um, when we got home, I said to you like, oh, can I give you a gift or can I buy you something?

Can I do something? And he was like, no, it's really fine. That's, I said $2,000. $2,000 was what I said. Yeah. And then I said, Charles has never declined money or gifts. So I'm calling. I know.

Well, so I was like, like, what can I do to say thank you? And I would, and we like chatting, he said that. And then when he was at my house yesterday, when he made the dog naked joke, that was when I was like, oh, we organised barbecue. And then as he was leaving, I was like, oh, thanks looking after Pippa. And like, so it was just like a cheeky joke. You didn't pay me for looking after your baby. I'm feeling really defensive.

So, but you're backing in the barbecue? Well, I did give you a barbecue. Okay. What would you like? Well, I think I already made it clear. $2,000. Well, because you have to think about it, like, you pay your normal pet sitter, but then you were also like paying for a house sitting,

which is normally like the add-on on like an task. Yeah, that's true. That's true. That's true. So $2,000 is probably about right. Now, last week, remember we did that segment about Hal's specific babysitting instructions? And we all laughed. Yep.

Charles claims that you left some hell fucking specific instructions for Pippa. like how much to feed her and stuff how specific was it oh would you like to see them um here so he so 82 grams morning a night for pepper 82 grams that's how much she has

not 81 or 83 no it's like that like how much they recommend per day in half that's like and like there was a scale that I'd just like make sure and then I would always go to like 86 then have to like take it out

then you take one out and it doesn't 80 She's like so specific. Because I think it's like 164. Yeah. Good maths. Is like per day and then you just halve it. So it's not,

that's not my specificity. I get the halving bit. Green toothbrush or half dentistic. Yeah. When I go out to give her that. Yeah. And Charles very specifically said if I go out twice in one day, do I give her two? And I said no, just when you're going out for a long time.

The bedroom lights. Oh, because I couldn't work this out. Because you've just called the Google, like, in the, like, kitchen. Yeah. And so I'm, like, yelling at it and it's not listening. And I'm, like, we just say stuff like time. I actually, that was annoying because I didn't think about it until just before I left. I was like, we don't, none of the switches are going to work.

Sorry. But I said, text me and I can turn it on. Yeah. I just kept saying, like, turn on. Oh, sorry, everyone. Sorry, everyone. Hey, turn on. Hey, G word.

Turn on. Hey, G. Yeah. Because then it was just, and then I could just turn the switches on and off. Yeah. Because then, like, once they're on. Now, that's better. Eat whatever you want, but bobbies are expensive.

Five dollars each just transfer me. Yeah, chill. Yeah, I didn't drink a single one. Yeah, thank God. You're charging five bucks a drink at your joint. That is ropeable. Puggy kiss, Pippa at least 3,000 times per day. What did you just say?

Puggy kiss. What does I fucking say? Please kiss. Pippa. How do you spell please? P-U-G-I-E. P-L-E-A-B-E. Where's the fucking L there?

That L goes into the eye. No. Yeah. No. Look at that. Yeah. No, I'm paying that. No, I'm paying that.

Whilst I get it now, and I'm actually okay with it now that I know what it means, can you see where Puggy Kiss came from? Who's the victim now? Here are some fresh towels. If you don't trust me, there's more fresh ones in the cupboard. No, no, no. No. P.S.

Bedding and towels in the onsuit is all. fresh so here is proof if you don't trust me because I had a feeling that this letter might resurface and I thought where's the proof this that's the proof take my word yeah I was a bit like oh where's the proof the proof is my word and the proof is on the letter you don't get it I don't but it was fresh it was and because like we'd also been over like the day before the two days before and like you could see that the bedding had changed. Because like you normally like have a duna each or whatever. Thank you.

Because normally in your bed. Okay, yeah. Let's not make it sound like you knew that what sheets were on it before. No, but you famously, you and Taubs have separate dooms. When you stayed for the weekend at the Airbnb, I was like, should I have arranged separate dunas or are these? We shared. Was it gross?

No, it was actually okay. Yeah. Because we were both knackered. Yeah. So it was like, we just. fell asleep. Looking after kids is fucking tiring. Like you did such a great job, but it's just, it's, by the end of the day, you're like, well, I don't have any stamina. Like, I recognize you like, if you're doing it all the days or if you, like, you know how much effort to put in because

you know you've got to come back the next day. Yeah. I ran myself out. You gave it everything. The first day, and then the next day I was like, back to back. Fuck. That kid's still here. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. Good on them. All right. Anything else we'd like to bring up before we kind of sign off on this whole big chapter of our lives. I feel like it was a successful outing. There's a few obvious little dots to, eyes to dots and teas to cross and a few barbecues to exchange. But like everything sort of...

I feel like I'm being made to be the villain here, the villain of the peace. When you're really the thick term. Are you denying? I'm just saying that like I didn't realize that there was an expectation of money to change hands. And Charles, I... Take the Davo definition of the screen. I am not that person.

That's what the person would say. I know that you're not, but the person that is that would also say that. That's a part of who they are. Feeling really triggered. Yeah. Do you want to rub your foot? You know that I'm not that though.

Like, I know that that is like classic 101 narcissism, but like I'm not that. And you know what? If you feel like shortchanged by this experience and I am really sorry and I would never want you to think I was taking advantage of you and I can pay you. I will also say that later in the week we have a story where we bag the fuck out of Charles for something he did on a date.

So just anything that you feel like your copying now, you get to give back pretty hard. Oh, I like that. You know what I mean? So if you feel a bit attacked, just know that there's something coming. Like you'll get your turn and so fucking that guy. You know what I'm saying? When's your turn? Every day, man.

Every day. Not on shoe spraying, like. I would just like to say that I thought I was a friend doing a favour and now I realise that we're not cool like that and that's fine cool I never fucking ask you for anything ever again I'll help you I don't expect stuff no like this fucking free load

when you said I offered Charles something and he declined I was like something's a miss here that's off brand for Charles yeah sorry do you have anything to say Charles no I said my peace I'm all good I've got something that'll bring you back

And it's from Andrea Goodwin. Hi, Andrea. And I need you. Hardly Noah. Hey. Yeah. The horse photo. Yeah, I love it.

Thank you. It's in the drawer. The horse photo's in the drawer. That's nice. If you want to talk again, it costs $2,000. You raise your fucking hand. It's more expensive for you to talk than to get a bobby soda. Hey.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, my side. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fuck you. Andrea. Hi, Andrea. She said, my fellow. Tarpers. Hi, Andrea.

I've started the fucking blog and I've taught my child to sew and now apparently I have become a quilter. That's so fun. Things have really escalated quickly. My brain said it has to go beyond me. What if all us Tarpers got together to build the ultimate massive quilt? That's so fun. So here is where I'm at.

Okay. If you want to be part of the TAR Around the World quilt, I need your help. One square from you to contribute. Your vibe, your country, your creative freedom, flag colors, weird local animals,

map symbols, unhaged fabric choices. You do you. Yep. You've got a 10 by 10 centimeter square. Yep. And you send it on through and she's like, I've set up a PO box so it's not fucking weird

and we're all friends, but you send through your thing. That's so fun. And then I'll put it all together and make this massive tarpa made quilt. I love, I've never done quilting before. I think I've got most of the stuff though. I was going to say, I don't want to like,

promise you to do, because I don't know how hard it is, but I just like, I felt like this was Tony Loggernerty. No, that is my area. I actually, I've never done quilting, but I did, well, I did break my sewing machine.

So I have, the Jill singer. Um, yeah, my, my singer. Oh no. Yeah, my singer start for anyone. playing at home. So I've just bought a new one.

And it's very nice. It's a singer heavy duty. Heavy duty. Yeah, it's a grey one. And that's got some good quilting settings on it. So I can probably give that a fucking well. It does. Fuck yeah.

Yeah. I reckon you'd be good for that. It's like the Gwm tank. You can take it anywhere. It is in the start the fucking, I'll take one of those instead. No, you don't get anything. Sorry, Ryan.

It is in the, I can't hear a thing. It's in the start the fucking blog threading. our Facebook group. That's so fun. And we can share a link to the specific post. We're not involved. Don't ask me admin questions. Oh yeah.

Okay. No, you've got to take yourself out of it straight away. Forward questions to Andrea. Yeah. But she's got a plan. Yeah. And she's sorted out and it's going to be sick.

Can't wait to see it. I love to see it. Tony loves to see it. We love to see it. That's amazing. Maybe we could do a post for that or something. Yep. Yes.

To make it easy to find. Yeah. So that everyone can find Andrea. Yeah. We can figure that out. Yeah. We can figure the logistics out. I've got you love to see it though

And that's a really sweet You love to see it This one's pretty good Gwendolyn O'Brien Hi Gwendolyn Gwendolyn said the other day My aunt is in Perth And I told her that my friends

Tony and Ryan loved Dom And said she had to try it So I hope she likes it as much as you guys And I was like Well she will Bad day to be a Hollandeau sauce Do you know what I mean? Bad day to be an espresso

She's going to have a good time Yeah The next day Gwendolyn sent an update and said, Update! She loved it. And she said,

my friend, your friends have such good taste. They must be really smart. Like, what a good recommendation. And Gwendolyn said to her aunt, well, one of them is a doctor,

so she is pretty smart. So it's a double-bagged. You love to see it. Actually, triple. Great recommendation. Dom. And me being a doctor. For me being smart.

I think you being smart and a doctor is the same one. Nah, not sure. I've seen some doctor. The doctor's out of fucking not that smart. So true. And we met that guy who's a doctor with the other guy before. It's a quadruble banger.

Quadrable. Quadrable. Well, Charles and I need to go and kiss and makeup, I think. Well, you do, but to... What? What? I've got beef with your fiancé. Why?

Remember what he said to me on the weekend? What he said to us? That she's having your... baby and we are in a relationship. Actually, you know what? It's not that fucked at all. See you tomorrow. Love you, food.

Yeah, coming out tomorrow, something pretty mundane. Yeah, something just regular. And shoe spraying week will continue. Bye, blah, bah. Please leave your comments and love and support for shoe spraying week below. Love you. Bye.