Toni and Ryan - In a hotel and in the bedroom

Episode Date: September 19, 2022

Things you can say in a HOTEL and also in the BEDROOM! Plus a turf war - it's neighbour VS construction at Ryan's place. Love youuuuuu Toni xxx Check out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast. Hi, I'm Tony. This is Ryan. I am the vice captain of the ship. Tony is our Lord Saviour. Blessed be. And we're calling one of our favourite places in the world. This is McKayla in Pennsylvania. Oh my God. Hello.

Oh my God. Oh my God. I'm so excited my God. Oh, my God. I'm so excited right now. I can't even put it into words. How are you? We're so excited because we're back in Pennsylvania, our favorite place in the world. Will you approve this podcast?

I would love nothing more. Yay! Michaela. Hi, it's Michaela from Pennsylvania and I approve this podcast. There comes a time in everyone's life where they find themselves in a turf war. If it hasn't happened to me yet, does that mean it's coming? Mate, you've been in a turf war. Remember the car park scenario at your old employer?

Oh, fuck. Yep. Work car parks, often a turf war. Space in the work fridge and who's taken it up. Yes. Very common turf war. Yeah, I've been a part of a lot of turf wars. I didn't even realise.

Also, I would consider like communal bins in apartment buildings, a bit of a turf war. I know of people who will put their bins out the front of their house but sort of like on the neighbour's side of the strip. And there's a bit of, hey, mate, put the bins out the front of your own house, not my house. And they go, oh, just like to keep the bins close to one another? No.

You're going to have to deal with this when you move out to the Burbs. This is a fucking turf war. Well, coming up soon, there's a turf war happening in my laneway right now in Richmond. Fucking hell. I can't keep up. I need everyone's help. Okay. Well, you're a part of this because you sometimes park in my street.

Yeah. And actually, where did you have to park yesterday when you came over? On the big road. So I live in a laneway. I parked like three kilometres away from your house yesterday. Tony couldn't even get into my laneway because of the turf war that's happening in my street. And I

actually was the one that brought this up and I said that thing The van? Is two fucking vans yesterday. But have you dealt with it? Did you see the signs on the construction? There's a fucking turf wall. We'll get to that soon.

We'll get to that soon. But first, this is things you can say in a hotel and also in the bedroom. Ryan, did you want to come inside? Always. Just come in. Stop doing that hand gesture. I know I knew what you meant.

Yeah. Sorry. But. Sorry. But thank you. Just trying to make it clear. Imagine how many people have been fucked in here. I did think there is a lot of crossover of them being the same room. I think you can say in a bedroom and also in a bedroom. We should do that one week.

Yeah, we should. It's a real test. God, there's probably jizz on every surface of this place. I'm sure it's been done, but could you imagine if a TV show took a, is it the black lamp or the white light? The UV light and just like. This room would be a fright, wouldn't it? This podcast studio?

Yeah. Well, we share this studio it? This podcast studio? Yeah. Well, we share this studio with some AFL boys. Yeah. Sam Draper. Turn the light off. Was it lastminute.com or lastaminute.com? You know how when you go to the concierge, there's like that little bell?

Yeah. Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. Service, please. It's supposed to be 24 hour. In any scenario, you would be obnoxious with a bell. No way. Yeah. I'm too anxious to hit a bell.

Oh, that's true. I just stand there and wait. I've waited at a butcher for like 20 minutes before. Wait to get some meat. Things you could say in the kitchen and also in the bedroom. It looked a lot better and a lot bigger in the photos. And now that I see it in real person, I'm a little disappointed. And you're paying top dollar.

Yeah. You know? That's things you can say at a hotel or I've heard in the bedroom. It looked a lot bigger in the photos. Gosh, there's some lovely foliage around the entrance, isn't there? No, there certainly is. Beautiful way to come in. Well trimmed.

The valet will put it in for you and when you're done, they'll pull it back out. That's a great service. Do I have to pay extra for that? You tip them. They're tipping you. You give them a tip while you're giving the tip. You know what I'm saying?

Should we have a drink first? Yeah. Yeah. Loosen up a bit. Five stars. And, yes, I will come again next year. That's all anyone wants is for you to come again next year. Oh, what a lovely shower.

The pressure is phenomenal. Do you know how I know I'm an old person? Why? The other day someone was telling me that they've just moved into a new house and I walked into the bathroom and I was like, oh, gorgeous shower. What's the pressure like? How old are you? I know.

Your last birthday you went from 27 to 44. I know. How's the water pressure? Suburban dad. Fucking suburban mum. Suburban. Can I say, though, in your defence? Yeah. It's important. Iturban dad. Fucking suburban mum. Suburban. Can I say, though, in your defense. Yeah.

It's important. It is. Yeah. If you've lived in a place. I've lived in a place without water pressure. Oh, we all have. Yeah. I've fucking rented houses for like years where you're like, this shower is just crook.

Yeah. And I've got to. What else can I do? Nothing. Do you turn a shower on in an inspection? No. That's a great hack. I turn on all the taps, flick all the light switches,

turn on the shower, have a look. Yeah, I will have a look at this place. I will consider renting it or buying it. I've never thought to do that before. Welcome to being old, mate. When you hit mid-30s like me, you'll be all about those light switches. Yeah, love that. Sorry, ma'am. Sorry, ma'am.

No, this is for you. Tony, I'm really sorry I don't have a big fridge. I've just got a mini bar. They're always so expensive. For what you get. Yeah. We're at the hotel. Motel

Holiday Inn Who sings that? Pitbull Oh that's right Mr Worldwide Bridget claims That Sean and Paul And Pitbull

Sean and Paul Yeah She's like I had to explain They're different people They are And years later She's still like Nah I've seen evidence they're different people. They are. And years later, she's still like, nah, I've seen evidence. They're the same person.

Oh, my God. Is she also on the same bandwagon that Avril Lavigne's been replaced by an alien or whatever? Well, she died. She obviously died 15 years ago. Did she? Yep. And we're denying it. But hey, if you want to believe what you read, I've done my research.

Fucking stay tuned for that tomorrow. Ryan's conspiracy theories. Before I leave, I'm going to steal some shampoo. Just to make it worthwhile. Yeah, I get it. If you're paying for the taxi, I think it's only fair. Did you want me to check you in or check you out? You can check me out and then I'll check myself in.

Oh, check myself in. Check her out in. Bring your bags with you. This is for someone who is inquiring about the accessibility of the hotel. If I go upstairs, will there be a railing?

Yes, we can confirm, sir. There definitely will be. Excellent. Sorry, we don't have a vacancy for you. That's a real shame. Imagine if you had a sign, no vacancy. No vacancy. If I push the right button, the maid comes instantly.

Lucky girl. You're telling me. There's plenty of room for activities both in the front and around the back. Heaps of space. Heaps of space. Plenty of room. Many people coming through today? Oh, yeah, about 3,000.

Shit. Yeah, busy strip. Let me just unload and then we'll go for a swim. Unload your swimmers. Man, I hope you're hungry because this is all you can eat. Show me that spread. Have a look at me buffet. I know it's not the fanciest with all the new mod cons, but, like, it's good bang for buck.

Value. Value. Value. Do we pay by the hour or by the night? As someone who used to work in a hotel, I actually got asked that. Oh, I bet. Yeah. Because you'd go, can I just pay for an hour instead of $100 a night?

Well, a lot of people are like, you know what we're here for. Yeah. Yeah. Because you'd go, can I just pay for an hour instead of $100 a night? Well, a lot of people are like. You know what we're here for. Yeah. Yeah. And because I worked, it was in the city. Yeah. A lot of people would come in at 2am, like hot from the club. And they're like, give me a room.

Whatever. Just. It's on. And the girl would be just like in their dress like. That's so sexy. You like that? One time also when I worked at the hotel. Yeah.

This guy didn't speak very good English. So I had to call a organisation for him. Yeah. That would send out a professional sex worker. Oh, wow. Yeah. How's that making that call for somebody else? It's a bit different than, you know, ordering someone else a Subway. Well, it's actually quite similar. Yeah, wow. Yeah. How's that making that call for somebody else? It's a bit different than, you know, ordering someone else a Subway.

Well, it's actually quite similar. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. They ask you, what do you like in the Sub? Yep. What kind of trimmings? Yep.

And then I'm trying to like relay my hand gesture about like, because they're asking like, would you require this, this or this? Yeah, sure. And then I go, this is what actually annoyed me about the whole situation, is I go, oh, it's not for me, it's for someone else here. Oh, and they go, yes, sir. Yeah, yeah, yeah, righto, mate, yeah. So what would this other person, what would they like to inquire about?

And you're like, no, I'm serious, I work at a hotel. Yeah, and then she came down to the front desk. Yep. She's working. I showed her to the room. Yeah, and then she like, I spoke to her on the way out. She got a tip and I was like, I feel like I should get a tip. Yeah, 20% manager's fee.

And I tried to explain this to him, but then suddenly his English got worse. Yeah. Yeah. This is when you're at the minibar. Yep. Oh, I've nutted everywhere. It's so salty. Room service.

More like womb service. How would you feel if Torbs put on a maid's dress and then knocked at the front door and you're like, what? And you're like, did someone order some womb service? I'd love it. I'd love that play on words. It's like, I don't know about the outfit, but I respect a good pun. But he's like, I forgot my keys.

He's like knocking on the door. Hey, it's Michaela from Pennsylvania and you're listening to Tony and Ryan. Yeah. and you're listening to Tony and Ryan. The people in Patreon will have seen last week's blog from the desk of Dr. Tony Lodge. Yes, they will. Not only was something exciting... Coming. Coming. Lodge. Yes, they will have. Not only was something exciting coming.

There was also I believe some nipple discussion from the doctor. Nipple chat. It's all health based. And some hacks that could genuinely impact your life. Yeah, we might share a couple on the pod. But that's in Patreon at the moment if you want to go and check that out. And a big shout out to our champion tapas.

Courtney Ditto, thank you so much. Ditto, right back at the moment. You can go and check that out. And a big shout out to our champion tapas. Courtney Ditto. Thank you so much. Oh, Ditto. Right back at you, bro. Marcio Santos. Nicholas Marabito. Kevin. Holly Crawford. Thank you very much.

Bailey Edwards. Matthew Brock. Brocky. Cheers, Brocko. Brocko's more than life. One of the great shows. I love that show. Hef.

You know how he's a wallaby? He's got a lot of words, Australian accent. Holly Crawford, Bailey Edwards, Matthew Brock. I've just read the same fucking 12 names out again. You're reading them a third time already. Marie Unati, Jaron Seara, Madison Henwood, Tracy, and Dolly Merey Nettleton. I went to uni with Dolly.

Oh, g'day, Dolly. And her name's just popped up and that's so fucking sweet. That is sweet. Hey, Dolly. Good to have you on board. Yeah, love to see you. Is she called Dole? No, I never called her.

I just did, but I never. Dolly Mare, that's my hyphenated name. Oh, that's cute. I like that name. I'm in a turf war. Yeah, so the drama is happening at your place. Is this why you bought a house? Are you just trying to get the fuck out of there?

A little column A, a little column B. The turf war has intensified. But as I was saying before, I feel like everyone gets themselves into a turf war at some stage. Yeah. It's a great point. The workplace is often a place for a turf war. I forgot about the drama of me with the parking spot. So you got a parking spot at work. And parking spot at our old work at Kierce were like hen's teeth, right?

Very rare. And once you got a hold of a parking spot, you would not give it up. No, not for fucking anything. And you'd even rock up early to work so that you could avoid the chance that someone else had snaked your spot in the morning. And because it'd be like 4am, like getting in and starting Brekkie Radio. Yeah. If someone snaked your spot, imagine the day that that would start for you. You'd have to go and find something on the street.

You'd be fucked. So this one girl in her contract says you get a parking spot. Yeah. And then she rocks up on the first day and they go, oh, but yeah, there's not enough spots. Yeah. And she's like, what's in my contract? And they're like, stiff shit.

Yeah. And then one day, Tony, who does not have a car park in her contract, said, can I have a car park? And they go, yep. Okay. Can I just confirm something? She did have a parking spot. It was just that she was parking in front of somebody else.

So then she would get parked in. Oh, okay. And she just didn't want to then have to say to them, can you move when I need to move? Every day, which would be a pain in the ass. But, like, she had a spot. Tony's already defensive about her tarp form. No, because it's not as if she didn't have a spot. She had a spot.

She just wanted my spot. And did you say, sure, you can have my spot? She never talked to me about it. She talked to HR. And what did you say, sure, you can have my spot? She never talked to me about it. She talked to HR. And what did HR say to you? HR were like, oh, well, like, you've got a spot. Like they said to her, you've got a spot. Like, it's the best we can do.

You're working on Brekkie. You're safe. You've got a spot. Her spot was actually secure. It was like under the, like in the garage. Long story short. Mine was out like in the elements. Tony got everything she wanted and this other girl got nothing

and it just, there was a bit of beef between the two of you. It was a turf war. Yeah, but she never spoke to me about it. But also I had to get like my friend Jane to pick me up for work for a few weeks because it was like lay low while it's hot. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, yeah.

So I have been in a turf war and thanks for bringing that up. I totally forgot about that. It's very traumatic. So there's construction happening in the street I live in, right? And I live in a dead end street. And at the end of the dead end street, there's trucks like driving in and out with the construction materials and stuff. Because they're doing all this construction.

It's so fucking loud as well. It's a fucking nightmare. They're building apartments at the end. It's so fucking loud as well. It's a fucking nightmare. They're building apartments in the end. But if someone parks in the last car park of the street, it kind of blocks the construction trucks. However, there is a sign that says no standing from here on.

So it is legally a spot. It's legally a spot. Yep. It's not as if you're like sneaking into the end. It is a spot according to the council. According to the council, according to the law, it is a spot. A permit only spot. Yep.

And within our little laneway dead end street, there's I think exactly one car park per house. Per house. Now it is just the street. So there's no like that's yours, that's mine, but it's just the right number. Yep. And you can only apply for one permit per house and stuff because you've chatted to your neighbours about that, yeah.

So there's a sign that goes up from the construction people. They've printed out in their office, just printed out on a piece of paper about this final car park at the end of the street, which is sometimes blocking their way. And they've printed a sign that says, please keep clear for construction vehicles during the day. Oh, fuck off. Get fucked.

You often? It's legally a spot. Drive in from the other side. Okay. They could drive in from that other side. They could. And this is, it's kind of hard to explain, but basically it's like a big other side. Okay. They could drive in from that other side. They could. And it's kind of hard to explain, but basically it's like a big empty lot and they put fences around the whole thing.

They could easily create an entry somewhere else. So you'd be on the same team as my neighbour Ben. Oh, me and Ben. We're like this. Yeah, like this. I love that you said that because you've never fucking met the guy. I think I saw him walking to his car the other day. Yeah, so I don't own a car.

Well, you can't because there's only one spot. Yeah, Ben's got a car. So I feel like I'm a, I wouldn't say an innocent bystander, but I feel like I don't have a dog in this fight as much as maybe Ben does. Yeah. And Ben, similar to you, goes, well, anyone could just fucking print a fucking piece of paper and stick it up. It doesn't mean it's the law. Yeah. And Ben, similar to you, goes, well, anyone could just fucking print a fucking piece of paper and stick it up.

It doesn't mean it's the law. No. But the fucking aluminium sign from the council, that's the fucking law. You fucking cement that bad boy in the ground, that's the fucking law, okay? You fucking printing something out on your Epson 3000, fuck off.

That's nothing. Sorry, I just fucking. Can you just close your ears for a second while I talk to the Tafas? Does this sound like the person who two minutes ago went, oh, turf wars, I don't really like them. I don't like to get involved. You can come back. I love your energy for this.

Thank you. And you are team home, yeah. No, I am team correct. I'm team law. Rules help people control the fun that they have. Rules are very important. If the fucking sign is cemented in the fucking ground, that's fucking play on.

This is what Ben said. And so Ben. Yeah, Ben and I, we hang out. Ben and I, we're mates. What does Ben look like? If it's the guy that I'm thinking of. Yesterday he was wearing a Katmandu jacket and a beanie. Does that sound like him?

I think he's got like a Subaru Impreza. No. No, okay. Or a Liberty or something. Okay, that's not him. No, definitely not. Different hot guy. Yeah.

Ben's like, yeah, it's not the law. You just printed a fucking sign. This is our street, whatever. So not only has Ben been ignoring the sign. Is Ben the rich guy? I mean, I rent, but the people that own it, like they're all fucking. Oh, yeah, true. In Richmond.

But is Ben the rich guy? His car's pretty nice. I don't want to out him in case some of the. Yeah, no, no, no, no, no, that's fair. So not only is he going, fuck these guys. He's up for a turf war. Oh, good. Ben, I'm fucking, that's fair. So not only is he going, fuck these guys, he's up for a turf war. Oh, good. Ben, I'm fucking come round, mate.

I'll come on this journey with you. Yeah. And so if there's multiple parks available, he'll actively choose the final spot. It's not like, oh, it's the last one. He goes, oh, is that one free, is it? Yeah. That's petty as. I love it's the last one. He goes, oh, is that one free, is it? Yeah. That's petty as.

I love it. He is petty as fuck. So that was about a week ago. But is he stressed that, like, they're going to scratch his car or something with the truck? I think he's like, I dare to scratch it. As in, like, see what happens then. I would never.

Yeah, okay. So now Ben's going to step ahead. Yeah. So he's gone. You guys want a turf war? You fucking got one. He is ready to rumble. I feel like. Yeah, he's like, scratch up. So he's gone. You guys want a turf war? You fucking got one. He is ready to rumble. I feel like, yeah, he's like, scratch my car.

Side story. He's like, scratch it, please. Escalate it. I dare you. What a little Carla Conti. Yeah. So Ben has noticed. And did I point it out to you yesterday?

They've taken away their A4 piece of paper and instead in a big spray can, in big letters. On this like green hessian that they've pulled over the gate. Yeah, so it's gone from an A4 piece of paper that said like, oh, can you please keep clear during the day to do not park here. 24-hour access required, written on like the whole wall. You can't miss it.

It's massive. You are not the fucking council. Fuck off. Yeah. And so Ben has gone, oh, seems like someone else wants to be a part of it. He's like, oh, you've seen me park there, you've heard me, and now you've responded. Well, now I'm going to respond back. And so now, oh, you've seen me park there. You've heard me. And now you've responded.

Well, now I'm going to respond back. And so now, because Ben's the same, he goes, you can't just write stuff. But then Ben goes, no, maybe I'll play them at their own game. So Ben says to me yesterday, I'm going to get my own sign. We'll pay for the fucking screen printing, mate. We'll make it huge. Wow. We'll get one of those big easel ones.

This is where we need Tony Lodge's help. Oh, yep. Oh, because I'm the official copywriter of the show. I've actually prepared three signs. I've got three options to choose from. Okay. But are we going to, these are just A4. Are we going to blow them up and make them huge?

Well, I've got A4. Well, they started with A4. Okay. And then escalated. Or do you reckon going to meet them where they are? Yeah. I reckon we've got to get one of those big shade sails printed off. Okay. And then escalated. Or do you reckon going to meet them where they are? Yeah, I reckon we've got to get one of those big shade sales printed off. Okay. Shade sales.

You know, those like massive things. Field banner, yeah. Can you just read the first one here? All right. Starting simple. Yep. Please keep clear for residence parking. Yep, I think that's all right.

It's not very severe, though. I feel like I want to go a bit more severe. A little bit more severe? Just a little bit more severe. Okay. Please read sign two. Please respect this no-through road by not going through it. Things you can say on a one-way street and also in the bedroom.

Well, it is a no-through road. It is a no-through road. And by default, you can't drive through it. And they've gone, oh, but no, we're doing construction there. And so we will drive through it. So who's actually disobeying the signs? I'd call the council. I feel like this is severe, but not the kind of severe I want.

What sort of severe? Because there's one more. Oh, one more option. Okay, lay it on me. Do you want me to read it out? Yep. This is the last one. We will park in our street. Oh, I like that. That's for the people.

If you don't like it, drive your construction truck somewhere else, because this is a turf war and we ain't back in town. I like that. Your sincerely tiny lodge. Why don't you just put my fucking phone number on there? Jesus Christ. So we'll put that one up?

No, can we write Tony and Ben? Okay, yeah. I'll laminate that for you so it doesn't get ruined in the rain. Please. It's a cold Melbourne spring. Go and check out our, where should I put this? In the Facebook group. In the Facebook group I put this? In the Facebook group. In the Facebook group.

Yeah, go in the Facebook group. Yep. A Tony and Ryan podcast. You can search it up. I will, I'm going to put this on the wall. Can you take my last phone call? No, you seem. I don't even fucking live there.

Two minutes ago, you wanted a turf war. You said Team Ben, you were on. It says we will park in our street. I don't live there. When you come over to our place and you park your car. And can I just say, because people are going to be like, oh, well, how's Tony parking in the street? I guess pass.

I park my car there during the day when everyone's at work and I always leave by 2 o'clock. So pretty much I swap car parks with Bridget. Tell someone who cares, mate. I'm just letting people know that I'm not disobeying the rules. No. Mate, do you want me on your fucking side or not?

Well, you are because your name's on the sign. Oh, fucking hell. Oh my god. Okay. Can we change it to Tony and Ben? Tony Lodge and Ben. No, I don't. No, actually Ben wanted to keep his name out of this. Okay, well I just don't want my full name in there. I've just realised Ben wanted to keep his name out of this. Well, well, I just don't want my full name in there. I've just realised Ben wanted to keep his name out of this. Well, Ben's not his real name, so it's fine.

Yeah, you're right. It's not. And I haven't said it 57 times on this episode already. It's ****. Oh, fuck. Sorry. I'll beep that one out. Yeah, let's just have my last name off.

Okay, actually, I will cross your last name out. Thank you. That's nice. With a pen. Okay. Actually, I will cross your last name out. Thank you. That's nice. With a pen. Okay. No, not you. Things you love to see. What do you love to see?

Tapa Jessica Winter shared this in our You Love to See It thread. So each week we put up a fresh You Love to See It thread where you can share memes and jokes and articles and good news. And brags and good news. Yeah, and humble brags. And we fucking love to see it. This one is awesome. Jessica says, I got engaged this weekend.

You love to see it. And she's posted a little photo with a schmickler ring. Little, sorry, huge ring. And she's gone and had her bloody nails done and everything, which, of course, you've got to do after you... Before you get that shot. Yeah, 100%. Congratulations to our Jessica.

Yeah, you'll have to see that. We're fucking so happy for you. She's in a car. Has Torbz proposed to you yet? No. This is about Jessica. Oh. Are you...

I mean, I know you're happy for Jessica, but are you... I'm so happy for Jessica. But are you also a bit jealous? Nah. This is awesome for Jessica. This is about Jessica. Because you would never, like, bring up in the office, like, that you hoped someone would propose to you?

No. No, I didn't think so. Because I don't want anyone to propose. Yeah. I could take it all over. Yeah. Don't even know if I'd say yes. Yes!

Tony, will you... Yes, I'll do it! Buy me dinner. Oh, okay. Sorry. Yeah, we'll have a womb inspection. Womb service. Womb inspection.

That's a bad smear, I think. Sorry, what was that laugh from Mother... Both of us. That was disgusting and evil. We sounded like angry goats. Yeah, we started a goat cast. This is from Deirdre. Just a couple of kids. Like, you know how bad it is? Yeah, yeah've started a goat cast. This is from Deirdre. Just a couple of kids.

Like, you don't have many kids. Yeah, yeah. Sorry. That was funny. Oh, thank you. Deirdre, I overheard a teenage boy on Valentine's Day. This is like a tweet that's done that works. Yeah.

And in the card it said, we're the same kind of weird. Is that beautiful? That's sweet, especially for a teenager. A boy, yeah. And the shop assistant goes, oh, that's super cute. Is that for your girlfriend? And he goes, no, that's for my grandma. That is so fucking sweet.

That is sweet, isn't it? I personally don't have grandparents. Like, I never grew up with grandparents or anything. You're really close with your grandma. Yep. Is that the kind of, like, you kind of have that kind of relationship with her? Like, is that something you would do? Well, we're not the same kind of weird.

But, like, not maybe the exact same sentiment, but that kind of. Pretty tight. Yeah. So when. That's so sweet. When grandma comes to stay or I go around there, I'll jump in bed with her and give her a cuddle. Aww. Yeah.

And on Christmas Day last year, she was down at the farm with Linda and David. Yeah. Hopefully you've got your white clothes. I do have my white clothes for the coffee. Yeah. And so she was staying down there. So on Christmas morning, I like snuck in with BJ. And I was like, BJ, jump on the bed. Aww. And so she was staying down there. So on Christmas morning, I snuck in with BJ. And I was like, BJ, jump on the bed.

Oh, gave her a smooch for Christmas. So BJ and I both jumped on her on Christmas morning. And she was like, oh. She's like, my back. Nah, she loved it, didn't she? Oh, she did. Didn't you, Grandma? That's what she told me.

She called me and said, how lovely is this, Tony? She also used to listen to the podcast, but doesn't as much anymore. And she said the other night at a family dinner, it's a bit too rude for me. Sorry, Grandma. Well, she can't hear you now. She's no longer with us. She's no longer with us. As a listener.

She's like, the goats were too much for me. You had me until Carla Conti. Conti! Conti, fuck, sorry. Sorry, Carla. I. You have to. Sorry, Carla. Sorry, Carla. Shit.

I'm just a bit of a dumb. Conti. Love you, bye. Love you, see you later, you fucking idiots. Don't be such a Carla Conti. I know why I said that. It's because I've been incepted by that guy I like on TikTok. But at the end of his videos, he says,

follow me, you fucking idiots. And I like him. Oh, I like that. Shay is his name. Oh, good. Yeah. Good side note. Fun. Great story.

Well told. What a great way to end the podcast. Keep that in. Yeah. Fuck. Two great episodes. See you later. Meow, meow, meow.

Love you, bye.