Toni and Ryan - JalaPeñis 🌶️

Episode Date: October 9, 2023

Ryan saw his Dad somewhere... Unexpected. Also - let's hear it for this fucking episode title, I'm SO proud of it. Love ya!! Toni xo PS (If you've got a SPICY confession you need to get off your chest, we wanna hear about it COMPLETELY ANONYMOUSLY HERE!)Check out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast. We're about to call Jocelyn, who I believe is a hot California girl. And Jocelyn said that herself and myself, Ryan, we have the same job. Fuckhead. Hello? Jocelyn? Jocelyn, it's Tony and Ryan. Oh my gosh.

Well, you sound like the hottest Californian I've ever spoken to. Yep, hot girls only in California. Oh my gosh. I was thinking the same thing about you guys. It's like giving my number to a hot girl. Yeah. Okay, I'll take it. I was waiting for her call.

Jocelyn, I was just telling Tony that you and I have the same job. What job is that? We're both extremely great graphic designers. Thank you. Thank you, Thank you. Yes. In high school, I did one term of Photoshop, so I am the graphic designer of Tony and Ryan.

Thank you very much. Everything that you see is designed by Ryan. We might need to get that updated. But Jocelyn, will you approve today's podcast? I would love to. Sway, thank you. What a hot approval. Yeah, hot girl confirmation.

This is Jocelyn from California, and I approve this podcast. Coming up today, when did you run into the wrong person at the wrong time? For example, maybe you saw your personal trainer when you're at KFC. Hey, if they're there as well, fair game. Yeah, that is a good point. You know, if I run into my PT at KFC, we go, we were both doing it. I didn't say nothing if you didn't say nothing. Yeah, you know, I won't mention the popcorn chicken tomorrow morning at six o'clock if you don't mention it.

Yeah, that's a big call actually. What about running into your ex when you look like shit? You know what I mean? Like, oh, could you run into me last night when I was fucking looking great? Yeah, or like if you put a bit of effort into your appearance, you don't see anyone the next day when you, yeah, you pull on fucking sweatpants and you go to the shops and you meet running to every person you've ever met in your life yeah i um was talking a big game to my dad and then he uh he he saw me at the wrong wrong place wrong time out in tempe was it uh he's in templestowe um now so lives in Templestowe. Oh, they might be neighbours. Yeah. Just keeping in the fam.

Yeah. Northeast represent. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Where do I live? You'll be in the north. North girl. Oh, finally. You're a north sider.

I think I'm a north sider. Yeah, you're not a south. I'm not a south side. No. But yeah, I'm a north girl. Yeah, but now you'll be in a true north. Like actual north. And north. For those playing along in Melbourne,

north of Bell Street is, like, is real north. But in a bad way? Well, she ain't in the inner north no more. Oh, is that good or bad? I don't know. The lingo. North of Bell Street, mate. Is that a good thing, though?

No, it's just real. It's real north side. It's real Northside. It's real. Oh. Yeah. What are you? Oh, rural. Sydney.

Yeah, Sydney. Way the fuck out of here. First confessions. Please submit them. TonyandRyan.com.au. They are annoyingly anonymous. Frustratingly anonymous. This one is called Spicy Sack.

Preppy Pete never wore protection until this one grinder hookup where his cock was still burning three days later. Oh, I thought you were going to say it's like, you know, when you're cooking and you use a bit of chili and maybe you don't wash your hands properly and then you go to the toilet and you... Surprisingly similar. Oh. Anonymous roommate says, even though he was on prep and didn't think he got an STD, I said, I think 100% you should go and get checked out. All the tests came back and it was clear and the nurse then did a thorough check. Oh. Which included putting a cotton bud into his urethra. And when she pulled it out, she got the answer. The grinder guy

had eaten something a little spicy that had like travelled through. Into the anus. Into the anus. The poopies. Spicy poopies. So when Preppy Pete was jamming his meat, he got a jalapeno seed in his pee hole, releasing the heat. You are joking me. That has taken a turn that I never saw coming. There was an actual seed from a jalapeno in his penis.

And it sat there for three days. Has that ever happened before? That sounds like a Ripley's Believe It or Not. Well, I think most guys would be wearing protection and thus it couldn't get in. But Preppy Pete was on PrEP and was like, I don't need it. Is PrEP, does that protect you from everything? Does it not only protect you from, yeah. Yeah, it's a bit of a cop-out from PrEP.

From HIV, yeah, that's what I thought. Bit of a cop-out from PrEP. Oh, you need to be safer than that PrEP-y Pete. Did you and Torbs have conversations about, like, how many people you'd been with previously? Or how long into a relationship do you have that chat? So, we have had that chat. Yeah.

But partly because the first year that we were doing it together, like both of us were like not only doing it with each other. But, yeah, like why? What are you asking me? No, I'm just kidding. Have you had that chat? I mean, the limit does not exist Would have taken you four days to say the number

Get out all those zeros Yeah Hey, they were good looking girls, they weren't zeros I saw this joke online the other day where The guy goes They're having this similar chat. Yeah. And he goes, is it a concern to find out your spouse has had, like,

a hundred different dicks in their mouth before you hooked up? Nah. And he goes, yeah, my wife's making a real big deal about it. I think, like, it's only, I think to think that you're the only person your partner's been with. I think he's like quite archaic. And I think it's now these days, like people are a lot more comfortable with their sexuality. You go out and you like try things and you meet different people and whatever. Like, I think it's all good.

We once watched, Bridget and I were watching TV and this like like, guy comes on the screen and Bridge goes, oh! Oh! Oh! Whoa! Whoa! And I was like, what do you mean? What? And she goes, oh!

See that guy? And I was like, yeah, that guy. He's hot as. And she's like, yep. And he's famous. He's an actor. Was it Hugh Jackman? It wasn't Hugh Jackman.

It was actually a guy that used to work for Nova in Perth. Have I told you about this guy? No. It was a bit of a scandal. And he got sacked. And then I actually worked with him later and didn't realise. I hadn't put two and two together. Oh.

And then I was like, I think you've banged my girlfriend. Oh, my God. Yeah. That's odd, isn't it? Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Well, but I think that. But he was annoyingly good looking.

Like, definitely better looking than me. And I was like, oh, okay. I don't think that person exists, mate. That was a test and you passed it. No, but like all of like- No, you're a hottie. I know you're a supportie. No, but you should see this guy.

You know you're a hottie. Oh, so the other night- You know Hugh Jackman, but who is? The other night we were talking about who is okay for us to hook up with if the other one died. Oh, you and Bridget. I thought you meant you and me. Yeah. Who would it be okay to do a podcast with if one of us died?

No, if you die, that's it. I'll retire. Same. Throw the microphone in the bin. Yeah. Sell it. They're worth a bit of money. Within about four seconds, we were just like, well,

obviously you'd be banging Dave Parsons because of what it's like. Oh, yeah. Yeah, and then we just talked about Bridget banging him for the rest of the night and just brought us together as a couple. Don't you think it's one of those things, though, where if someone asks you that, you've got to wait the right amount of time. Bridget, I had barely finished asking the question. So, Dave and Kimmy, they're strong? Yeah, how are they going together?

Yeah. But you know what I mean? It's like you've got to go, oh. Oh, I haven't really thought about it. I've never thought about this. Oh, you know, I'd be so sad for a bit. Like, you know what I mean? There was none of that at our house, mate.

No, there was none of that. Bridget didn't approve of me hooking up with Jane Bunn from the Channel 7 Weather Girl. Good choice. Threw that one out there. What number was I on the list? Wasn't mentioned. Okay.

By either of you, that's really rude. I thought Bridget and I had something special. Next confession, because that's what we're doing today, apparently. Okay. By either of you. That's really rude. I thought Bridget and I had something to do. Next confession because that's what we're doing today apparently. Great. Bathroomer. Bathroomer? No, it's just bathroom. But when I said it, I was like, oh, no, I heard that as well.

Hang on. A rumor about the bath. You won't believe who's been inside. The bath. Torbs had a who's been inside. The bath. Torb's had a bath the other day. Did he? Yeah. What's happened to him?

I know. Anyway, that's not a rumour. That's real. That's true. He's so tall. His knees. Our bath isn't that big. Yeah, it's quite uncomfortable.

That's why he doesn't play. Do you have a bath in the new house? It's even smaller in the house than the bath in the new house. Yeah, if you've got a spot at the back, who gives a fuck? Anonymous says, I hate cleaning my bathroom with a passion. Same. The idea of hair that's not attached to anything really bothers me. Wet hair that's not attached to anything really bothers me. Wet hair that's not attached.

Anonymous said, when my husband's out of the house, I hire a cleaner to clean the bathroom. Hot. And because he also hates cleaning the bathroom. No one likes it. No one goes, like, oh, bathroom time. But because he knows he hates it and he comes home and he knows I don't like it, he comes and he's so grateful and appreciative that I've gone out of my way,

even though I've been sitting in the backyard all afternoon having a beverage. While there's been somebody else doing it and you go, here's your 50 bucks. Thanks so much. Anonymous says a victimless crime. It actually is a victimless crime. But you know the other thing that I know it does add a little bit of goodness that he thinks that you've done the hard work. Yeah.

But to be honest, if Torb said to me, look, mate, you hate doing the bathroom. I hate doing the bathroom. I've just, I've organised someone to come. I'd go, let me suck your dick right now. Like, I'd be so keen on that. I would have said it for a thank you. Yeah, but like. I could have been getting my dick sucked the whole time.

Yeah. Rookie, mate. Idiot. But the thing is, like, it doesn't matter who does it. Me not having to do it is the gift. Yeah. And Torbs actually, I think anybody, their partner, husband, wife, like whoever it was, would go like, you've taken that out of my brain.

The mental load of you going, not only have I organised the bathroom to be clean, I've organised the person. They're coming at 3pm. We can do whatever we want. So... It's the mental load. You're not cleaning the bathroom and your mental load's reduced. Torbs isn't cleaning the bathroom and he's getting his dick sucked.

And some old mate from down the road's earning 50 bucks. Yeah. I'm 50 bucks, 50 bucks. No loser in that situation. I've always said that. This is Jocelyn from California and you're listening to Tony and Ryan. A massive shout out to a few of our champion tapas.

That is Tony and Ryan Podcast. Who's? Over at our Patreon. All the links are in our bio, in our show notes, in our Facebook group. You can go and check it out. There's weekly blogs. We do monthly live streams. We do teleparties where each month we watch a movie online, do a live chat, which we might actually have to change because I think

it's hard for people not in Australia to join. So we might have a look at the logistics of that. We're definitely going to have to stick with Netflix originals, but even that, they aren't a sure thing. They're not always on there. So basically people in other countries have signed on and gone, oh, the movie's not available. Yeah. Yeah, we'll have to figure something out. We're going to figure something out. But we do lots of fun stuff in there. A couple of the people that are over there, Alexa Herrera.

Thanks, Lexi. Alexa. Austin Tunis. Sorry. Garrett Mutoff. Thanks, Gaz. Fucking love you. I talk to Garrett a lot.

Alison Caraveo and Carl Webb. This one, man. Thank you very much. Carl Webb Shooter. Tobey Maguire. Spider-Man. Thank you very much. Web shooter. Tobey Maguire.

I actually think that Andrew Garfield, then Tobey Maguire, and then that new kid. That's your order? Yeah. Who's that new kid? Tom Holland. No, I'm not a fan of his Spider-Man. Really?

No, I'm not a fan of his Spider-Man. I'm a big Spider-Man guy and I'm, yeah, I don't know. He's most people's favourite. Andrew Garfield is most people's least favourite because he's too hot and cool. Like, Peter Parker's supposed to be lame. Yeah, a little, like, yeah. Yeah. Tobey Maguire, fantastic Spider-Man.

Andrew Garfield. I think I just love those two movies. Like, the amazing Spider-Man movies are really good. I think. And I'm not a, like, Marvel superhero person, but I'm into Spider-Man. My mate Matty Heap in Canberra, huge Spider-Man guy. I could have guessed. And when he watched the first Tom Holland one, he said he walked out of the cinema fist pumping

the air. With a fat a cat couldn't scratch. With a fat a cat couldn't scratch and he said finally they've got it right. Oh see maybe it's because I'm not like the comic books. Maybe it's truer to the comic books. I think more of the same. He's like, no, he's supposed to be a bit of a loser and a bit geeky. I think those movies are good. If Andrew Garfield played Peter Parker in those new Spider-Mans, because the movies are really good.

Zendaya is fantastic in them. Isn't she just the best? What can't she do? Nothing. I love Zendaya's music like you know that song that she's got okay so when the when zendaya was maybe it was the end of euphoria season two like you know it was everywhere was zendaya oh yeah i was working on the radio station i'm like can we play zendaya replay because you know it's zendaya's time and they went no

that is the god they just hate good music, don't they? They fucking hate it. If you don't want to play replay by Zendaya, fuck off. Stay home. Yeah. Anyway. When did you run into the wrong person at the wrong time? We said earlier your personal trainer at KFC, but you bring up a good point.

If they're there too, you can probably get away with that. What about running into your financial planner at the bookies at the horse races? But again. No, but maybe they're just at the races enjoying the day, you know, and you're like, yeah, I'll put 200 on number eight. And they go, oh, g'day, mate. How you been? Oh.

Yeah. Or when your accountant calls and you go, hang on a minute, I'm just doing some online shopping. And they go, not on the work card. That's happened to me. I posted things on my Instagram story and saying, like, if I buy fake nails but post about it on my Instagram, can I claim them on tax? And my accountant replied to my Instagram story and saying like if I buy fake nails but post about it on my Instagram, can I claim them on tax?

And my accountant replied to my Instagram story just with the eyeballs and I was like, thanks, Liv, obviously not. Lots to know from you. A very soft no, but a no nonetheless. Had dad and dad's side of the family around for a big Sunday lunch. Beautiful. Sunday roast. You guys were actually there earlier in the day. We did a live stream from my house and I fucking kicked you guys out

because I had people coming around. But the food smelled amazing when we were, because Bridget was getting things ready. Wow. Oh, okay. Yeah, about that. What? So, Bridget and I were planning to get up early and get the Weber going.

Yep. And roast some chooks. Because you could do that while we were working. Yeah. Kind of thing um and whilst we did do some cooking we might not have got to the full so because she was she was um wrote like uh making some quinoa salads roasting some veggies things like that yep um and dad asks do you want me to cook anything do you want me to bring anything um what can I do? Yep. Isn't that such a classic question?

I wonder, is that just an Australian thing? Like, what do you, like, what can I bring? You go, nothing. And I have to bring, like, it's almost like nicer to give someone a job. So, that's what I have. I have to do that with dad. Okay. And he, I think it's also like, even if he doesn't need me to bring anything, he'll ask

me to bring something. So, it just feels like everyone's contributing. Oh, yeah. Everyone's part of it. And because I'm not like the black sheep of that family, but it's I'm also, it's usually all like, can you bring some bread or bring some fruit? The fruit salad on Christmas? Yeah.

Oh, mate, the fruit salad. But yeah, but normally I'm, you know, like lowest rank. A shit job. Yeah, a shit job. A shit job. Do you think it's because, and I'm not trying to bear dick. Yeah. Do you think it's because you're always late?

Because if I was inviting someone who I was like, oh, they're always late, I'm not trying to bear dick. Yeah. Do you think it's because you're always late? Because if I was inviting someone who I was like, oh, they're always late, I'm obviously not going to bring, I'm not going to ask them to bring something that could, like, make or break. No, I'm not always late with that side of the family, though, to be fair. Just me. No, like, they're late people.

Oh, okay. So, I wouldn't be, like, the late one. Yeah, right. So, like, because if I was inviting someone who I was like, you always cancel or you're always late, I'm not going to be like, can you bring the raw chicken that I can put in before we ring the egg? Yeah, no, I think it's also being a useless, like I'm not a cook. Yeah.

I'm not that guy. So, yeah, I'm not going to be in charge of the roast and whatever. Yeah, that's fair. But this day I was like, no, after mooching off you for 30 years, it's my time having you guys to my house for the first time. The first time they've all come over. It's quite special. I'm very excited about that when we move into our new house.

So I was like, no, Bridget's putting the Weber on. We're roasting some chooks. Don't bring a thing. Don't bring a thing. We've got it covered. But then knowing my dad, he is not going to show up empty handed because he's just like, it's old school kind of guy. Fair enough.

So I say, oh, dad, you know that cheesecake shop at Bolton Street? You know the cheesecake? Is it the Cheesecake Factory? Yeah, Cheesecake Shop. Yeah. At the Cheesecake Shop. Yeah. So, there's one on Bolton Street and I was like, you know that passion fruit one we always get?

Why don't you pick out one of them on the way through? Beautiful. And dad just goes, I'm on it. And you go, great. I've given him a job. I don't need to fight with him. He's like you. He's too nice.

Sometimes you say, no, don't do anything nice. Just turn up. It's fine. But you just feel guilty. Just give him a job. Yeah don't need to fight with him. He's like you. He's too nice. Sometimes you say, no, don't do anything nice. Just turn up. It's fine. But you just feel guilty. Just give him a job. Yeah. Yep. So dad goes, got it. That's a good job. Yeah. Because you can't, it's harmless. Yeah. Pick up a cheesecake on the way through. Yeah. We'll have some dessert. So we do the live stream.

Yep. He sends a text going, g'day mate. Just confirming we'll come around about 12. Do you sure you're, and I was like, mate. Beautiful. All good. Yeah. We're going, G'day, mate. Just confirming we'll come around about 12. Do you sure you're... And I was like, mate. Beautiful. All good. Yeah. We're going to roast these chooks.

That's sweet of him to do the late check-in as well. Yeah. But the thing is, because we were doing the live stream and Mabel didn't sleep well, like, we had not put the webber on. Yep. No big deal. Takes a while. Takes a while to get going.

But you go... And I was like, well, let's just go get some chooks from... I'll go down to Sammy's Charcoal Chicken. You go down to Elizabethan Chicken. Oh, no, that's the one in, you're thinking of Henrietta. And that, you went there. That's in Sydney. Fuck's sake.

Yep. And then on a Sunday morning, it turns out Sammy's in Eltham is closed. Shocker. Yeah. So, I go to the chicken shop, which is the better chicken shop. For those in Eltham, they'll know, and I've said this before, the Bolton Street chicken shop is really great. Bolton Street.

So that's where the cheesecake shop is. Yeah. And I hadn't put two and two together at this stage. So I roll into the chicken shop. Bolton Street chicken shop. Bolton Street chicken shop. Go get a champion. Oh, by the way, for eight adults, six kids, how many chickens do you reckon?

Eight adults, six kids, how many chickens do you reckon? Eight adults, six kids. Five? That's what I thought. Apparently, that's a fucking lot. Like a lot. Like I've eaten a lot of chicken. Because I'm thinking- We only got away with three.

Well, so I'm doing the maths in my head. Torbs and I got a hot chook for lunch on Saturday. And we had two rolls each and then we had another one roll each on Sunday. So if that's two and a bit adults. That's the maths I was doing but then I was reminded that you don't eat

like a piece of shit when other people are in. And by piece of shit I mean like I will have seconds and thirds and fourths. Yeah true. When it's just me and Bridget I'm like I'll get another bit of chicken. You just don't end up doing that when you're chatting and have friends over. But, like, I guess if you've got all that salad and stuff. But if you're having a chicken roll, that's like a normal amount of chicken, isn't it? Sorry, chicken math.

Yeah, chicken math. Yeah. Yeah. Chicken logistics. And we had a lot of salads and snacks and chips. So, you know. So, it's the cheese board at the beginning of that fuck show. Yeah.

Because you fill up on Brie. So, after telling Dad, don't worry about it, all good, we're getting up early and we're putting the Weber on about 17 times. I walk out with five chickens in my arms. With chicken? That's, what an image that is. And guess who rolls into Bolton Street to go to the cheesecake shop? Dad.

He actually calls me and goes, did you sure you want me to get some bread? And I go, yeah. And he goes, are you sure about the chicken? And I went, oh. And he goes, I can see you in the thing. And I walk out and I see his car and I'm like. And you've got all these chickens.

With my headphones in. I'm like, is that you in the grey Mazda at the top? And he goes, yeah. And not in a dick way. Well, actually in a very dick way So How'd you go with the Weber What a dad fucking thing to say

Oh yeah how'd you go with the Weber mate Like the other day when I messaged Torben and said Yeah how'd you go with booking the pet sitter How did that go by the way Yep all confirmed all good All good but you know what I mean Like it is quite passive aggressive Now I don't see Dad that often.

And we don't, like, we live close, but it's sort of like there's shops near his, there's shops. Like, we don't bump into each other at the street fucking ever. Yeah. To be fair, I did ask him to go to the exact place that is literally next door. Yeah. But I was just. That's what the chair says. And did you then do that thing?

Oh, see what I'm like. Because he was obviously following you to your house. Yeah. Well, I said, but it was really funny. He's like, yeah, how you been? Blah, blah, good, blah, blah. You're like, fuck, this is all the catch up we were going to do. What am I going to talk about when you get to my house?

Yeah, fuck. You're like, hopefully something interesting happens on the drive home. Yeah, I crashed my car. Oh, listen to this podcast. Your dad's like, what is it? Like, he had no idea. I don't think dad gets podcasts. But no, no, it was great.

Great to have the family around. Oh, bless. And. Hey, everyone ate. Everyone ate. It doesn't matter that the weather wasn't on. Everyone ate well. And the Bolton Street.

I know I've mentioned this many times over the last year. They came through. They are the best one. Well, don't let Sammy's chicken here let you hear. Fuck. Honestly. We've been talking about charcoal chicken and Tony's just flashed his hands out. My brain is on chicken now.

But is it, like, as much as it's just, like, the lying about the Weber and the making a complaint, do you think that's also a bit deep in, like, you kind of want to, like, prove to your parents, like, you're an adult. You're all good, yeah. Yeah, like, no, no, like, I'm not a kid anymore. Like, I can fucking handle this. And also that, like, it was your problem and you were going to solve it. Dad, I told you, I've got it covered. Yeah, like, imagine if you'd then gone,

we don't have time for the web app, and you called him and you go, hey, could you actually get some chickens? Because, you know, this X, Y, Z happened. And then you go. Yeah, if I had told Dad the day before, can you come around at 5 a.m. tomorrow and light the web and cook? He would have done it. He would have been there.

Yeah, he would have done it. And he would have snuck around the side and done it quietly to not wake you up as well. Like, he would have, yeah, he would have absolutely done that. Annoyingly nice. Yeah. Well, sorry about that. That's okay. Well, on the plus side, I didn't have to cook any chickens.

I reckon there'll be probably flood with comments of people that have done the exact same thing, of people being like, yeah, so I told my parents it was all covered and then it wasn't. Oh, have I told you about Christmas Day when I was in Lake Tahoe, California? So I said for a week. Oh, and you said, oh, I'll take care of Christmas lunch. Yeah. I said for a week I'd take care of it. And then on Christmas Day, I went to the supermarket and was like,

one turkey, please. And they're like, you can't just. They're like, you can't actually talk to the closed doors. Like, you couldn't even get in. Yeah, but then they're like, well, we don't have fresh ones because you've got to order them in advance. We've got a frozen one. I was like, yep, all good.

And they're like, yeah, it takes like 15 hours to defrost. I'm like, yep, 10 minutes in the microwave. I'm sure it'll be fine. Also, turkeys don't fit in the microwave. Yep. I know. So, we chopped it into pieces'm sure it'll be fine. Also, turkeys don't fit in the microwave. Yep. I know. So, we chopped it into pieces and did it bit by bit. I'm pretty sure we started cooking the turkey.

What did you like get a hacksaw out or something? Oh, I mean, we were so drunk all day. So, there was three or four of us. You just hit it with the car until it like smashed apart. Three or four of the guys were working on the ski field. And I was like, guys, by the time you get home from work. You'll have a beautiful roast lunch. And one of them was a cook.

And so we were texting him going, yeah, so it turns out we can't do this. What do you reckon? He's like, fuck, well, why don't you try it? And so there was the three of us staying back there. And we're like, well, it's Christmas. We might as well have a brandy for breakfast. And then we'll have a this and a that. And you got an eggnog on the go.

Yeah. And it was like. How good is eggnog? Fucking fuck me right up. It is so good. it is so we can drink a few liters of that on the plane yep i will be yeah i love eggnog same i brandy like yeah like i think um one year my sister-in-law did like eggnog in her thermo mix like with rum yep and it was fucking good yeah i was real naughty mix Thermomix too. Yeah. Because it measures it all out.

Could you do that in your hot pot? Instant pot? Probably. I mean, what can't I do? I'll let Torbs know how good an instant pot is. Anyway, you're in bed with the frozen turkey trying to defrost it. I actually couldn't tell you how we did it. But the guy said we got home at like seven at night. And they're like, you guys were just like asleep on the floor.

And there was just like turkey on the table and it was pretty good. Was it the classic like you had like flour on your face, like cooking montage? Yeah. But also like, like we were 20 and just like partying all day. Wasted. So they got home and like, hey, guys, happy birthday. And we're like, happy birthday.

To Jesus. He was there. He was there. He was there. Oh, man, if someone had said he was there, I would have believed them. Because they walked in and they've had a hard day's work and they just walked into like a – like we could not talk. We could not do anything. And they were probably so jealous that they'd been working all day

and you guys had had a mean time fucking around. I think there's some food on the table. I'm going to pay them. Yeah, I'm going back to Australia. My flat's actually now. What do you love to see, Tony? My love to see is from Conway on our Patreon. Conway, Conway?

Conway, Conway. It is, yeah. Hello, Tony and Ryan. I'm listening to Anxiety for the Win from earlier this year, an episode that we did. And y'all, Yin, were sharing a story about how a tarpa wanted to thank Tony for teaching him the phrase, long walk for a short drink of water. Yes.

I didn't realise that this is where I'd picked up that phrase, and I had to share with you what that phrase has done to my life. Oh, my God. Conway says, I went into an interview for a job I was not qualified for. Don't even really know how I got it. Don't ask, don't get. Yeah, exactly right. It was a panel of five people who each headed the department

at different locations for this job. So he thinks he's walking into this cash thing. There's five head honchos in there and he's like, shit, I really need to impress them. I nearly shit a brick but played it cool and, you know, fake it till I make it. During one question that was worded quite vaguely, I started to ramble and feel the silence as I tried to, like,

make my way to an answer. You know, you kind of go, the interesting thing about that is. I'll figure out my answer when I get to it. Exactly. I slowly shifted my rambling to an answer and finally got to the answer that I wanted. Yeah. They all started taking notes.

You know how nerve-wracking that is when you're in an interview and they go, right, and they start writing it down. They all started taking notes. You know how nerve-wracking that is when you're in an interview and they go, right, and they start writing down. They all started taking notes at the end of my answer and I reflexively, like, went, oh, that was a long walk for a short drink of water. And I was ready to walk out because I thought I totally bombed the interview. A beat later, the entire room erupts in laughter. The mood completely shifts for the rest of the interview. And I started cracking jokes and just being my normal self because, you know, the ice had melted a little bit.

Started being my normal chaotic self for the rest of the interview. A week later, I was offered the job. Fuck yeah. I had no idea this is where I picked up that phrase, but all I can say is thank you for helping me land the job. Turns out that long walk was worth the drink of water. Yeah. Juice was worth the squeeze.

There you go. But Conway, fucking congratulations. And how funny that he's like, yes, I was listening to this weird old episode and didn't even realize that's why I'd started saying it. Great. I'll take that. That is great. Congrats on the job.

Well done. Well done. Maya, I love to see it. No pun intended. But remember when you roasted me endlessly for putting give BJ a worming tablet into the calendar? Yep. We do have, we've got a shared calendar.

I can see everything that Ryan's up to. He can see everything that I'm up to. So someone goes, oh, can I book in a meeting? And Tony goes, yeah, sure. Just let me check if Ryan's free. Oh, sorry, we can't. He's giving BJ a worming tablet, which was scheduled for like a two hour slot

in the middle of the day. Paul tweets, I just learned the hard way that my calendar is also not on private. Just had a call from my boss. I want to do that product intro on Friday, but the only good time I have for everyone else, you've already got blocked out for pick up a chicken. Is that something you can move?

He forgot to put the Weber on. But his boss is out for pick up a chicken is that something you can move to put the webber on but his boss is like pick up a chicken can we reschedule that so we can do the product intro do you reckon that the boss was being like yeah could you um reschedule the chicken or was he actually like can you it is that like is it for work is it a personal yeah i think it was a bit like based chicken like obviously it's it's midday and he's gone um friday i'll go to the thing that night i'll put a reminder in the calendar i won't forget fuck that is hilarious and the boss has gone the google calendar goes i'll put this in here he probably bummed into you down at bolton street your dad was there getting the cheesecake he's gone did you know this one's so much better than sammy's fried chicken down the road

did you know that yeah i've been to. I had a chicken as well in Sydney. Not as good. I didn't expect you this late. Did you have to reschedule? Yeah, weren't you supposed to come this morning? Yeah, I had a call. Don't even ask. Had a product intro, apparently.

Yeah, and your dad was there in the Grey Master. Hello, mate. You're picking up that chicken now. G'day, Rodney. Fuck. All right. Thanks for listening today. We'll chat to you tomorrow.

Might as well. Might as well. Might as well. Yeah. What are you doing for dinner? Oh, I've got a pickle chicken. Love you, bye.