Toni and Ryan - Mashies Lodge

Episode Date: May 23, 2023

WE'RE BACK BABY! WITH A BABY! RYAN HAD A BABY! Love ya! Toni xoxoxCheck out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to the podcast. Hello. My name is Ryan. I'm with Dr. Author, bestselling Dr. Author, Tony Lodge. Yeah, you are. And we are calling Massachusetts. And this is Chris. Chrisachusetts. Massacris, no. Massachucris. Oh, no. Don't you Chris. You're okay, mate. Sorry. Hello? Hey, is that Chris?

This is Chris. Hi, Chris. It's Tony and Ryan. How are you going? I'm doing great. How are you? We're wonderful. What have we caught you doing?

Whereabouts are you, Chris? I am in bed getting ready to go to sleep. Oh, what are you wearing? What are you, Chris? I am in bed getting ready to go to sleep. What are you wearing? That was a genuine question, Chris. What are you wearing? I am wearing my underwear and that's it. Is it Calvin Klein?

Because I saw someone wearing Calvin Klein underwear the other day and I thought, isn't that a flex? It really is. Who was it? It was our producer, Cam. He's wearing it now. He's wearing it now. I hope they're not the same.

Let's stop talking about our underwear. And Chris, will you approve this podcast episode? I absolutely will. Yes. Legend, thank you. Hey, this is Chris from Massachusetts, and I approve this podcast. All right, welcome back to the podcast. Since we've had a few weeks off, two big things have happened.

I've become a father. Congratulations. Thank you. Thank you. That is so exciting. Mabel Betty has joined the world and we'll get to that soon. But apparently, according to Tony, something more important has happened in the world. Something that seems to be first up, top billing of the first show back.

Don't worry about the baby. We're going to talk about something else that's rejoined the world, which is? Mashies. They're back. Where from? There was no woo. There was a woo for Mabel, but there was no woo for Mashies.

So Mashies at KFC are back. So I guess to rewind, I've gotten about 90,000 DMs. We've got about 2,000 posts pending in our Facebook group. I've gotten messages from friends and family. friends and family, I've gotten text messages, comments, photo comment, everything about mashies coming back to KFC. Don't know if anyone remembers the mashie. It was like a ball of mashed potato deep fried from KFC.

And they are fucking elite. What I will say, I love mashies. Like I fucking love them. Hang on. Can we just stop for a second and appreciate the product itself? Can you? Mashed potato. It's like a ball of mashed potato. So, you know when you get, like, potato and gravy from KFC?

It's just, like, in a tub. Yeah. So, it's, like, the same, like, firmer mashed potato, like, mixture. Yeah. And then they, like, bread it and deep fry it. And when you go, trust me, I actually really like it, I mean, no fucking shit. That sounds unreal.

Of course I like it. It's delicious. And, yeah, I love mashies so much. I lament that they took them away. I hate that they're like a limited edition food. A crime against humanity. But I don't know that I've talked about them that much on the pod. Like I actually don't remember.

The way our inbox lit on fire, it was as if you'd changed your middle name by depot to Mashi's. Tony Mashi's Lodge. Actually, yeah. Did we change that to your name? And then I got this message, well, one, several of them said it, and it was like, oh, your campaigning on the podcast just worked. I don't even remember you saying it.

I don't think I've ever said that. Well, apparently you have. And it is. It actually, maybe people are making this assumption about me because it does make sense, and I do like them. People are like, oh, you know who would love a matchy? Tony and Mashie's Lodge. Mashie's Lodge.

Let's let her know. It sounds like a local footy play. Oh, Mashie's Lodge. Mashie's Lodge. Let's let her know. It sounds like a local footy play. Oh, Mashie's in the halfback flank. Yeah. Good work, Mashie's. Keep it up, love. Maybe that's what I should do. I should wish, you know how we've talked about joining that football team?

Oh, don't. Yeah, but yeah. I could get Mashie's on my jumper. That'd be sick. Yeah. Did you have like a final year hoodie at high school? Yeah. Did you have a nickname on it?

I just said Tony. Oh. Very creative back then. I didn't have a nickname. I Yeah. Did you have a nickname on it? I just said Tony. Oh. Very creative back then. Didn't have a nickname. I just didn't really have a nickname. Well, you did. You just didn't know it yet. Mashies.

Yeah. I didn't know that this was coming. In about 12 years, I'll be known for this. I'm just getting in early. What was on yours? Dunny? Yeah, Dunny. Maybe it was just Dun.

It's so funny because the other day, like my, off air chat, my osteo, Hot Ramsey, who we talked about before, he, I went and saw him the other week. Yeah, I bet you did. And he was like, he was like, oh yeah, how is Dunny going? And I'm just like, this is a different person to me. Anyway, so everybody in the world is really happy for me. So am I. I'm very pleased for you.

Because the mashies are back. Someone messaged me and goes, oh, hi, Ryan. Are you with the baby at the moment? And I DM him and said, yeah, why? And he goes, I just wanted to let you know to tell Tony about the mashies. Yeah, could you tell Tony about the mashies? They go, it better be top billing on your first show back. And I'm like, don't you worry, sweetheart.

I think actually someone commented on the picture of me with Mabel on my Instagram. I think someone commented on there and said, did you see that the matches are back? Anyway. But yeah, KFC doesn't open till 11. I took this photo with Mabel at 10am. Oh, look, it's 10.45. I've got to hit the road.

I've got an appointment. Yeah, I better go. So have you enjoyed the matches? Well, so this is the thing. What thing? I know. So last week, a week ago today, actually, my boyfriend Torbs, who I love. Through gritted teeth.

Who also loves a mashie. Torbs mashies Torbs. Yeah. I just realised that his nickname is his last name. Dunny Duns. Dunny mashies Dun. Anyway, my boyfriend, who I love very much, he also- Is Mabel's actually short for mashies?

That's like her full name on her birth certificate. Mabel Mashies Dunn. Mashies, just call her Mabel for short. Yeah, or maybe we'll call her that. Anyway, so my boyfriend also loves a mashie. He last week had his wisdom teeth out. Oh, poor thing. And he can't eat solid food yet.

Are you implying that mashies are solid? Well, you can't have anything like with bits. Oh. So he could eat the mashed potato fine. Yeah. But he wouldn't be able to enjoy the mashies experience. Well, I'll come around and I'll eat the batter off the outside. You know when you suck the chocolate off a Malteser?

Yeah. I mean, he could have the mash. Because when you go, he can only have soft foods. I'm like, what? What? Mashed potato? In front of the KFC brought out. And so I was like, well, you could eat a mashy, couldn't you? He's like, Tony, no,

obviously not. Are you telling me you've been abstaining from mashies? So he said, well, sweetie, you've got to go and get, like they're your favourite food. You've got 20 million messages about them. You have to go and have some. I was like, nope, I'll wait until we can enjoy mashies together. And I'm really hoping that the limited edition-ness of them isn't,

you know, only two weeks because then they'll be gone by the time they can eat again. Because here's the thing though. You can't sleep on a mashie and that's the thing. I've always said that. You can Google that. You can't sleep on a mashie and that's the thing. I've always said that. You can Google that. You can't sleep on a mashie. But here's the thing.

When they bring these things out, like head office goes, cool, we'll keep an eye on the sales figures to see if we're going to like keep them. Well, I'd be what would be keeping them in business. That's what I mean. So it's like not only you waiting is risky, you waiting might force them into another early retirement. I reckon that marketing's on the phone. They're going, well, where's Tony Mashie's lodge?

Where's Mashie's at? Where's she at? She's not playing footy for Wendery, is she? Wendery. They need a half-back flank. Oh, sorry. I just got a head spin from laughing too hard. I haven't laughed in four weeks.

Okay, here's what I reckon happened, what is it now, May? I reckon late January someone's rolled in, a tarp has rolled into a corporate meeting in KFC and gone, guys, if we're going to bring them back, just bring them back in Richmond because there's a hot spot. And then that person's going to rock into the office today and they're going to go. Oh, so the hot lead you had was a fucking piece of shit. There's a hot spot. And then that person's going to rock into the office today and they're going to go.

Oh, so the hot lead you had was a fucking piece of shit. We've brought mashies back to Richmond and nothing. But see, maybe. Discontinue. Maybe a better idea would be to not have a mashie, right? Because inevitably they are going to take it away. Do I not like. It's better to have lost of love than to have never loved at all. That's wrong wrong but lovely.

What's the saying? It's better to have loved and to have lost than to have never loved at all. Did I say that exactly? You said better to love and live and live and live it a like a. Well, forgive me that Ricky Martin's also a mashies man. Ricky mashies Martin. Ricky mashies Martin. Ricky mashies Martin. But maybe I should abstain permanently so that then I don't miss it

when it's gone. Okay. Businesses, especially like KFC, they're always thinking about the bottom line. Oh. Are they, do you reckon? If it's selling, it'll stay. Simple as that.

No, see, I don't agree because I reckon there's heaps of limited edition shit that would fly off the fucking shelves. Maybe, is it the hype? That's what I mean, the hype, but then they go. But then if it sells well, they don't keep it because there's heaps of really good shit that they take away. But are people actually buying the good shit? Yeah.

I reckon. I reckon because they go, okay, here we go. Would the limited edition foods sell well without the hype of being a limited edition food? Do they need that hype and exclusiveness to kind of entice you for a few months to try it? I'd buy mashies every day if they weren't limited edition. Okay.

Yeah. So. Yeah. So. Yeah. But like, because I'm trying to think of other things that I've really liked that they took away. I don't think I've ever had one. The McDonald's McRib Burger. Fuck me. I don't think I've ever had one.

Good for you and your cholesterol, but fuck me up. What is it? So it's like a burger. Thanks. And. No, but the thing that's weird because you go, oh, but it's a McRib with their like bones in it. But it's like this sort of deboned rib meat,

and I don't want to know how like pulled apart and put back together it is. But somehow the geniuses at McDonald's have figured out a way to get this like and it's like the barbecue saucy kind of rib kind of vibe. And what kind of bread is it? Is it like a normal bun? In a bun. Yeah, and it's a McRib. And there's not a lot else in there, which I don't hate.

Oh, so there's no like lettuce and tomato or fucking. Right. Two bits of bread, slap a rib in it, son. Wrap it in paper, put it in the bag. Do you know what I like from Macca's? Because I am a sucker for a burger with beetroot in it. The Macca's. The Macca's.

That's also a limited edition food, right? I know, yeah. Don't they have egg in a Macca's? I think so. Isn't it beetroot and egg? It would have to be because an Aussie burger has beetroot and egg in it. And the Macca's with an O-Z, controversially. Yeah, O-Z, yeah.

Do you reckon that's what comes out for a summer, every third summer maybe? I think they bring it out sometimes around the Olympics. Yeah. You know when they do that? Yeah, because people are like, oh, I'm proud of being Aussie. Oh, we'll get the Macaws. Fucking put a bit of beetroot egg in that one, sweetheart.

Yeah, they're not Mashie's Oz at KFC. For me to show how proud I am to be an Aussie, I've got to buy them a car. Yeah. Yeah, that is fucking great. Even, I know it's not a food, but I do get revved up for Monopoly, which is one of the great scams. McDonald's Monopoly gets me every year.

I actually, I didn't know we were going to be talking about this today. Do you know what I, so while you were away having a baby, I kind of did like a big spring clean on the house. Oh, great. And you know what I literally threw out on the weekend? The tickets. A tiny little Tupperware container filled with Monopoly tickets. You never use them, but you always keep them.

From probably three years ago. Never won anything. Keep them every year. Oh, I might fucking. Yeah, you get the two for the Mayfair, but not the third one. Yeah, there's half a jet ski in that. Yeah. Yeah.

What did I just say? I don't know. Do you know what's the biggest ripoff in the fucking world? What? That Hungry Jacks are now doing Uno. Oh, turn it up. Yeah. I mean, tell me you can't think of an idea without telling me.

Like, surely. Like, you can't think of something else. Blow up. The TV show. Your fucking brain stopped, mate. The TV show. Fuck, oh, my God. I haven't been sleeping lots.

I was going to say, you're done. Should we cut you a break here? What the fuck? In Australia. Oh, blow up. There's a TV show in Australia called Lego Masters Australia. Yeah, I know. And it's been dominating.

And that's Hamish Blake. Hamish Blake. But it's Lego. And so that's Channel 9. Yeah. And Channel 7 will go, well, we need one of those. We'll do one with hot air balloons. Not hot air balloons.

Like just regular balloons. Party balloons. Not hot air balloons. Like just regular balloons. Party balloons. With air in them. Yeah, like twisty balloons. Yeah, just like Lego Masters except a bit different. And tell me you don't have a new idea without telling me you have a new one. It got canned after two episodes, by the way. It's already off the air.

Is it really? Yeah. Oh. Yeah, and all the puns of the TV websites were like, oh. Deflated. Deflated, nice. Yeah, it's been fucking so good. We'll put this in the Facebook group, Tony and Ryan on Facebook,

but we want to know the best limited edition foods. What's the limited edition food that you wish they would bring back or that every time they bring it out you stock up maybe? Yeah. Because do you remember like when another Hamish and Andy reference, but when they brought out the gravy chip? Yeah. That was fucking delicious.

So good. So good. And also, can everyone in the episode thread for today, please refer to Tony as Mashies? Yeah. Oh, you have to. G'day, Mashies. We're actually changing the podcast to Mashies and Ryan.

Mashies and John. Mashies and John. Mashies and John? Yeah. Just rolls off the tongue. That's not your name. What? Mashies and John. Yeah, it just feels right.

So instead of Tony and Ryan, it's going to be called Mashies and John. Oh, it's not going to be good for our CPM. Hey, this is is a big day. Is it? It's the film premiere of Tony Lodge Still Calls Australia Home. I haven't watched this yet. Yeah. Like I actually haven't seen it.

And am I correct in saying, live brainstorm, you will see my reaction. You're going to watch it later this week and we'll film your reaction and that will be a part of the whole full story. It's not just a song, it is a film. It is. Tony Lodge Still Calls Australia, debuting on YouTube this Sunday. How fun.

So fun. Should we do like a watch party or something? Is that a thing? Yeah. No. Yeah, okay. Yeah, apparently, yeah. Okay, sorry.

Too many ideas. Okay, on tomorrow's show. I'll just move on. Actually, like Friday's show, there'll be details on like what time and like how we can watch together. Okay. Producer Kim, you want to write that down because we'll just see if we can hack that out.

Great. Yeah, but this Sunday though, a real moment in time, you're going to see a young girl's dreams come true. Oh. That's you. And they're mine. Yeah. I'm young.

Thank you so much to a few of our champion tapas over at our Patreon. Thank you. Jonathan Bernhardt, thank you so much. Ava Rodriguez, Jason Humby, Wedge Antilles, Augusto and Augusto and, sorry, the sneeze has thrown me off.

Augusto and Eric and Eric Meow Shell. Meow Shell. Meow. Meow Bull. Your baby. Oh, with the baby chat? Yeah.

Follow up. Follow up. Before we obviously, you know, we talked about the mashies, but now I'll let you talk about your baby. Mabel Betty Dunn has joined us in the world. She's here. Toni Lodge is officially a godmother. My godmother.

Yep. She's an absolute sweetheart. She's got everyone wrapped around her finger already. Yeah, she does. I don't know if this is normal for other parents, but we don't call her Mabel that much. I still forget that her name's Mabel because Bridget just calls her chicken.

Yeah. And I call her girlfriend. Yeah. I'm like, can I be your girlfriend? That's cute. And then Bridget said the other day, like, at what age is she going to realize her name's not girlfriend? Or chicken.

Yeah. Yeah. And I don't know if that's normal for other parents, but we've just not called her that. The only time I've called her Mabel is when I blurted it out in a restaurant, which I can now confirm months later is what I blurted out in front of you guys. So lots of people thought that you said the name in an episode, and I was getting all of these messages of people being like,

oh, it's Anna. I heard him say Anna. Oh, it's Dorothy. I heard him say Dorothy. I think I said Bron once because my dog BJ, Bronson Johnson or Bronald McDonald. Yeah, like he's got

57 names and I said Bron once. And I think someone's like, oh, her name's Bronwyn. And I was talking about the dog. So I was getting, and to everybody's credit, they sent like private messages because they didn't want to go, oh, he said Jessica on the podcast. Is it Jessica? Like they didn't want to go oh he said jessica on the podcast is it jessica like they didn't want to scoop you on the name which is very sweet but

some people did pick up that in the episode just before bridget gave birth that at the very end i said you know maybe she'll come today maybe this will happen hang on maybe this will go down pick up on it or did you just pick up on it? Because you were so chuffed with your little sneaky words. I was. So did you message someone going, hey, can you message us back and say, is it Mabel? Because I was very clever of you, Tony. No.

So when you announced the name was Mabel, I saw a comment and it was like, Tony was saying maybe at the end of that episode, I wonder if that was her like little hint. No one said that. They did. I'll find the comment. I'll find the comment. Not now, obviously, because I'm working.

Between my wife who gave birth to our child and me, the supportive supposedly husband who's just like in the birth suite helping out, between the two of us, who do you think needed the most medical attention? And before you answer, I'm not good with blood. Don't like the look of blood. Blood doesn't look like the look of me. Blood and I have never been mates. So you and blood aren't like me and mashies is what you're saying.

Yeah. Or I really don't. Okay. Obviously something's happened. I really want to say that Bridget needed more attention than you did. She was fine. She did pretty well actually. Yeah.

What a trooper. Okay. Don't like blood. Lay it on me. What happened? Oh, pretty much that. Did someone have to like sit you down? Did you have to have the ice chips?

You know, on a movie, they're like helping the husband. So I'm white as a ghost. And so Bridget's holding my hand. And because by this time, neither of you had had any, like because it was kind of like. Yeah, it was a long one. So Bridget was squeezing my hand. And like I think I'm going to, you know, I've got a fake finger. I'm going to have to get that reinserted because it's fucking long one so yeah bridget was squeezing my hand and um like i think i'm

gonna you know i've got a fake finger i'm gonna have to get that reinserted because it's fucking my hands are just trying you can reinsert your finger you're a dad now can i is that awfully mad um surely not yeah deal with energy now. Sorry. Oh, I just. You go and I'll go after you. So I'm white as a ghost and they sit me down in the chair and like lean me back. How embarrassing. As if you couldn't deal without the attention for five minutes. And I'm like laying like starfish, arms out, flapping. I'm no good at all.

And the doctor is like between Bridget's legs doing what she needs to do. And she looks over to me and I'm thinking she's going to say like it happens all the time, don't worry about it. And she just looks over at me and goes, that's so embarrassing for you.

Was I the doctor? And I was like, yeah. That's good from the doctor? And I was like, yeah. That's good from the doctor. I like that. Medical comedy. See? This is what people need. Absolutely nailed me.

And then I think another part of it is, now this seems like the biggest cop-out because obviously, obviously 99.9999% of the hard workness is Bridget. Yeah. Probably more. Yeah. But it is very difficult to see your partner like in pain. I can't even imagine, yeah.

But I didn't even want to say that because I'm like, well, it's tough for me to see the pain. Imagine actually being, you know what I mean? But you're like, you're doing us a favour. You're like you're having our baby. So, you know, I'm here for you, but I can't do anything else. But seeing like Bridget in pain is like not nice to see. And just wishing you could do something.

I'm not great with blood, as previously discussed. It turns out I'm not good with needles. That was a new one. I can't watch needles going in. No, neither. I can like know about it but i and i can i take a needle myself like when i have my jabs and stuff like i'm fine but i can't see a needle going in yeah um but then word got around the hospital that um were

you a hospital celebrity uh no i wouldn't definitely not celebrity but well because nurses do like their handover and stuff yeah And when another doctor comes in, they're like, you know, they just bring you up to speed really quick. And they go, oh, yep, they told us what's going on. So top of the handover list was Ryan's not good with blood or injections or pretty much anything to do to her. I can't believe you couldn't just let Bridget have her fucking moment. Mashies are back and you're thinking you're the main character.

I can't believe this. So every time there's like a handover, just coming in, Bridget, I believe you're a Taurus and a blood temperature is, what blood type is this? Blood temperature! What's the normal shit they say? Did you just say she's a Taurus? A Taurus.

Oh, I didn't say she's a Taurus. I don't even know if she's a Taurus. But, you know, whatever information they need to pass on. I don't think that I can pass on. Were you in a hospital? Did you do a home birth or something? There were just people hanging out. Bridget, I believe this is your preferences.

Just checking this is your birthday. And I believe, Ryan, you're bad with blood. And so every time a new person came in, like, yep, so this is Bridget. They're expecting a baby girl. He you're bad with blood. And so every time a new person, they came in like, yep, so this is Bridget. They're expecting a baby girl. He's not good with blood. That is actually quite caring, isn't it? It is. Because they're like reading the room that you're not good with that.

Because otherwise every time someone new comes in, they go, hey, can you hold this blood bag? And you go, actually, no, I can't. So when the baby was born, so the baby comes out, the doctor's like holding it and goes to pass it to me and then a nurse like dives in between me and the baby, goes, he's not going to, because obviously the baby comes out. Like it's like, you know, in the movie where the person dives

in front of the president. Yeah, a bullet. Yeah, a bullet. It's like this nurse just goes, no, launches across the table to like block the bloodied child. And so then they like towed the baby off before they, you know, like cleaned it up a little bit before they handed it over. So a moment you've waited for for years that you and Bridget have both worked towards and like tried for

and like she carried a baby for nine months for, you know, you guys to kind of realise this dream. And you didn't hold the baby as soon as it came out because it had a little bit of blood on it. Well, again, it was the diving midwife that made that decision. The diving midwife. I think by then the love and the excitement outweighed the little bit of blood.

Yeah. Okay, good. But again, they've seen our prior, me hitting the deck, and they're like, well, we ain't taking no chances. That's actually good because otherwise I hand you the baby, you go. Yeah, and I fall on the ground, the baby just flops onto the floor. Yeah, no, like, I mean, I get where they're coming from.

Yeah, I do actually appreciate that. So they clean the baby up, you know, just a little wipe down or whatever, and then pop her into my arm so i got to hold a you know 30 second old little baby and uh bridge was is is fine doing very well um but she was like i think the the shock the kind of come down of like so we're in the hospital for a very long time that adrenaline and like yeah so she like got actually taken away to go to recovery for like an hour or so after like she was a bit sick and a bit nauseous and all the drugs and stuff and so it was just it's just me and mabel for the first uh probably hour and a bit uh which was crazy so when the baby comes out it's like

it's obviously under a lot of stress yeah you. You know, clenched fists, eyes closed, they're screaming, they kind of sound like. So that's the first like 10 or 15 minutes, whatever. And then I'm like holding her. And so like I'm obviously straight away like, oh, my God, this is amazing. Yeah. But then after 15 minutes, she kind of like, because they're trying to figure out like where are they?

Well, because they've been in this like little watery sack. So they're a bit freaked out like what the hell's going on so for the first time they've felt air on their skin and stuff yeah uh or seen anything yeah um and so i reckon 15 minutes after the sort of shock of being in the world she then like finally like opened her eyes and so the first time she opened her eyes i was like holding her like right up to my face so the first time she opened her eyes, I was like holding her like right up to my face. So the first thing she saw was like looking into my eyes. And I've now been told that all babies have blue eyes. That's this new information apparently. It's new science.

I didn't know that. Yeah. All babies have blue eyes. But I didn't know this at the time. So at the time. Is that why they say baby blues? Oh my God. Yeah.

Yeah. All babies have blue eyes. Blow up. Yep. Yeah. But again, I didn't know this. So then she's opened her eyes and I've gone. She's got my eyes. She babies have blue eyes. Blow up. Yep. Yeah. But again, I didn't know this. So then she's opened her eyes and I've gone, she's got my eyes. She's got my eyes.

She's got blue eyes like her dad. And then, so I was standing there. It was just the two of us. And I was standing in a room by myself sobbing. And then a nurse comes in and was like, why is this baby all wet? What? You've been crying on this baby? No, but the nurse comes in and goes, oh my God, are you okay?

And this is the, like one of the nurses that has seen me like past that earlier. I'm like, fuck this bloke. High maintenance. And I go, yeah, no, she's just opened her eyes and she's looking at me. And like the last 15 minutes has been beautiful, but it's only just hit me now. Yeah. Like just incredible diseases and stuff.

And so because Bridget was in that recovery, they go, yeah, you guys are on level five in room whatever. Do you just want to take her up? You go, do I need a license or something? Do I need like a permit to take this baby? She's yours. You can do whatever you like. And so it's just the two of us.

I was holding her. We went up the lift, checked in, hanging out, the two of us, and she was just looking at me, like just looking around. Because when you came around for a cuddle, was she like looking at you? Yeah. Yeah. So I think I was there a couple of days after she was born. Yeah.

And she has like just kind of started to like look around a little bit and stuff. She loved me, of course. She did. And I thought, oh, she's got eyes like me. But now I'm realising that. Yeah. She's got my eyes, how beautiful.

Because someone said when there was a photo of you on Instagram, someone goes, it actually looks a little bit like Tony. It's a fucking baby. They just look like a baby. That's what I thought. But no, but she does have Bridget's snowscumber though. She does look like Bridget in the face. Yeah, but then someone goes, oh, she looks like Tony.

I'm like, is there something you and Bridget haven't told me? I was actually carrying the child. Oh. Yeah. It was my egg. I don't know. I just ripped it out of me and threw it over. I don't know.

I thought I was going to find out you were the father after all this. Oh, that would make more sense. Yep. Okay. No, it is. Yeah. Oh, sorry. Yeah. Oh, damn. But it was great to see Godmother in sense. Yep. Okay. No, it is. Yeah. Oh, sorry.

Yeah. Oh, damn. But it was great to see Godmother in action. Nah. It's like when I was at your guys, when I was with you guys, it's like you've settled into being parents so well. Yep. And it just all seems so natural and like your house is like really calm and it's nice to be there.

It's not like, I don't know. And I was saying this, I said this to you, but it was like, it wasn't as if you kind of thought, oh, Ryan and Bridget have a baby. How weird. It was like, of course, they've always had a baby. They've got a kid. It just suits you so well. And I don't know if it's because I have had enough time

to get my mind around it and I've been part of the like, oh, we're buying a crib today and we're doing the room and whatever. But I saw it and I was like, that just makes sense. Yeah. Yeah. Well, being a parent is good, but it's fucked. Yeah.

But it's good, but it's fucked. Yeah, I bet. Like, it's fucked. Yeah, I've had Pippa in the vet a few times recently, so I actually completely agree. What has been not... Can we talk about what we spoke about the other day, about like being tired and being a parent?

Yes, yes. Is that a weird thing to talk about? Nah. So two or three... We had coffee the other day, and two or three times you said something, because you've... Like Pippa genuinely has been like sick.

Torbs has had his wisdom teeth out. So you've been like Nurseippa genuinely has been like sick Torbs has um had his wisdom teeth yeah so you've been like nurse Tony running around looking after it yeah and you were sort of telling this story and obviously you've been running around tired and then every time you said the word tired or it's it's draining you went oh but like but you know like you know what I mean completely you know I know it's not to what you're dealing with but like and I was like just because I've got a child doesn't mean I own being tired. Yeah. Just because I haven't slept much last night doesn't mean, like me having two hours doesn't mean you got 25.

Yeah. Being a parent isn't like, like you're allowed to not be a parent and still be tired. Yeah. And it was almost like a relief washed over you because you're like, I am tired. The dog's crook, Torb's is crook. I'm fucking tired. Can't we just be tired together instead of competing about who's more tired? It was actually really nice and it was like a wave of relief

because I was like, oh, I'm glad to know that I don't have to justify, you know, like because I would hate to feel like you either thought that I was doing that or that, you know. It was just really nice that you were like, Hey, Hey, stop that right there. Like we're mates. You don't have to do that. And I was like, Oh, thanks. Well, one thing that I've, I only noticed the other day, like, you know how you said,

Oh, it's like, seems natural to us or whatever. I was sort of like, and cause it's still sinking in. I still like wake up and go, there's a kid. It's been like six minutes. Of course it feels, yeah. It's almost like someone's going to come around and go, oh, thanks for babysitting. And you go, cool, all the best, bro. I'm like, no, this is your one.

This baby fucking lives in our house now. But there's often this chat, and I don't know if other parents have felt this, where it's, your world changes in an instant and it's like this whole, and like, it doesn't, it actually doesn't change much at all. Like obviously your priorities are different and you love this person, but when you like, you came around and it was just calm and it was like you've always been like that. Like we, me and Bridget were like, oh, we still feel like the same people.

It's just like someone else is a part of the crew. Yeah. Like we were a team of two and a dog and now we're three and a dog and we're just doing our thing and we're the same people. Yeah. And I don't know, like it's sort of almost freaked us out when people are like, oh, everything changes. And I'm like, oh, but we like our life.

I don't want anything to change. We're just like it's going to be different, but it's not going to be completely different. And yeah, I don't know. We were just like underwhelmed is not the right word, but we were just like, yeah, we've been building up to this and now she's here and it's awesome and it's beautiful and we're living at home.

But it's not like I'm a different person. Yeah. No, I definitely don't think that you are. But I felt nervous before you had the baby. And you and I talked about this so it's not like weird that I'm bringing this up. But that I was like, oh, like, is everything going to be really different?

You were like, I don't think so. And I was like, oh, he's got no idea. Like, as if I fucking knew. And then, like, it actually isn't. Like, and even this morning you were like, oh, you know, I said to you, how are you feeling? Like it's our first kind of early day back. Like, how are you feeling?

You were like, yeah, like, you know, a bit tired but, like, all good. And I was like, well, the thing is is that we can kind of adjust how we work because, you know, we get to choose that. I know that's a privilege but, like, we get to choose that. So, like, yeah, like, we'll just go with the flow. And you're like, yeah, cool. Yeah. So it wasn't even as if it was like, oh, well, I can't change that

and you're fucked and you're different and whatever. It was just like, yeah, cool, just be honest. Yeah. Well, when you say I'm not fucked, like, you know, there were some times. Oh, here we go. Like, you wouldn't know. Yeah. You wouldn't know. You wouldn't know. You wouldn't know. You wouldn't know.

And thanks to everyone, all the Tarpers, who, you know, a lot of DMs, a lot of lovely messages and comments and people have sent some gifts and stuff, which is really nice. I have so many baby outfits with, like, Tarpa artwork on it. So cute. Maybe I'll do a little montage of my Instagram story or put them in the Facebook group or something because they're really cool. Yeah, it is very sweet.

So thank you for that. Let's do something you love to see. So Tony, what have you got? I saw this viral story the other day. You might have seen this. A plumber did work for a 91-year-old grandma with cancer and the invoice that he left behind went viral. So this is him.

Yeah. Beautiful this is him. Yeah. Beautiful little plumber. Yep. And the invoice description is call out to boiler, high pressure and has two leaks. And then it's got like a special note where normally there would be like an amount. Yeah. It has C notes and says lady is 91 years of age, acute leukemia, end of life care. So like she's being like gently held until she kind of,

you know, passes away. No charge for this lady under any circumstances. We will be available 24 hours a day to help her and keep her as comfortable as possible. So this woman. I'm going to cry. I'm emotional. I've had a child.

I know. This woman is, like, about to pass away, and she didn't even have fucking hot water. And this guy was like, no, like, we'll fix, like didn't even have fucking hot water and this guy was like no like we'll fix like you will have whatever you need and like the last thing you do is deal with a fucking tradie like i'm busy trying to die over here and now i'm dealing with the tradesman but like because they'd probably be either family or a nurse living in with them you know and they like would be like well i can't be fucking running in and out to help and whatever.

But I just thought that was really kind and I know that it's one of those things where it's like, oh, if only we could do that for everybody. But that has made the difference to that woman's life and her family. And I just thought you loved to say that. I thought that was beautiful. You loved to say that. I sort of regret doing this one last now.

Okay, great. I mean, I did Mashes before your baby, so. Yeah, fuck you. Who are you to say? Yeah, you know, it's fine. My love to see it's a motivational quote. Love it. If you're feeling down, if your self-esteem needs a little pump up,

I've got something for you. I love this. Should I say it to you or should I look into the camera? No, okay, I'll say it to you. Do it to me. Tony. Tony. Yes. Today and every day, you're someone's reason for masturbating.

Kind of wish you looked into the camera. I was looking you in the eye when I said that. Yeah, while your hand was under the desk. That's lovely, isn't it? I don't know. I can't decide whether that's nice or not. Yeah, but how beautiful is that plumber? Yeah. Fixing the pipes.

Sorry. May she rest in peace. She's 94. She's not dead yet. I don't know. And she's 91. Thanks for listening. But beautiful day. When do you get to mash i literally thought you're

about to say when do you get to masturbate um torbs should be eating solids by the weekend i think he's like i've got a baby at home is your baby on solids yeah um i think he'll be on solids by the weekend or maybe just after. So I'm hoping we get in before the end of the mashies. I did say to him, like, maybe I'll just go and get some through the drive-thru, eat them in the car. Why don't we just sneak out after the show? Just not say anything. But I just feel so like, I'm just a beautiful person, basically. And I'm really sacrificing my own happiness for my boyfriend. Some people are just nice. Maybe you guys aren't used to it.

I don't know. Sorry. It's just mashies. It's not a big deal. Apparently it is, actually. Everyone has agreed it's a big deal for me. Yep. You think there's no inner turmoil, but we're all seeing it spill over.

I just really want some mashies. And to masturbate. Masturbate. All right, have a good day. We'll chat to you tomorrow. Love you, bye.