Toni and Ryan - NORMAL or NAH with ShxtsnGigs

Episode Date: May 25, 2026

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If someone's like going hard at someone in a shopping centre or like in public he's like yelling going, who yells? I love it who yells. Oh, trigger me. Yeah, it would trigger me. That would trigger me. There was this guy once and he was like raising his voice at a... We were in like a banquet like somewhere where people get at. And Tony goes, imagine yelling here.

Oh, no. Yeah. Nah! And he was... You'd have to morrow it. Yeah. Trigger me. Wow.

Honestly, I was high for five days. Imagine yelling here. Oh, that's so cold. Hi, I'm Brian from Norwich in the UK. Hi, this is Charlotte from Cheshire in the UK. Hey, this is Kane from Nolan Riddish, New South Wales. And I have a previous podcast. Welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast.

Hi. Hi. This is Dr. Orth, Tony Lodge. And today we have one of the biggest YouTubers podcasting duos. We won't take that to heart because people get us confused with you guys all the time. They do? They do? No.

No. No. No. No. No. That's never happened. Two best friends hosting a podcast, pretty original from you guys. I love that for you.

Massive community and some allegations online about you guys being short, which I won't bring up. James and Fuhard. Thank you so much. You're from shits and gigs. That was the most unique introduction. That was a good intro. I liked it. I liked it.

Thank you so much. This is a brand new job for me, doing the intros. Oh, yeah. You killed it. Because you're like our third guests we've ever. have a hat. Okay. Or third and fourth,

I guess. We don't really have guests because some, like, we just, like, we just, like, in Australia, there's no one there. Yeah. That's the first thing. Cool. How often do you guys have guests? There's like a,

we tried to, for the last two years, we tried to aim for once a month. We've never here. Yeah, we've been unsuccessful, both years. But I think this, this year might be the year.

Do you find that? I feel that for you. Half the job is trying to figure out a time when you're all free and then you're like, why am I spending four days a week on this? Yeah, literally. It's stressful. It's not worth it. Yeah.

The admin. It's the admin chat. We are anti-admin. Okay. Of all kinds. Ryan's car hasn't been registered for like six months. So like we just don't do admin. I don't think he wanted that live, to be honest.

Let's cut that one out. We just found this out though. Oh, really? And then Ryan goes, but I'm going to. It's fine. It's fine. It goes the time that you're allowed to pay a late fee has now elapsed as well. Oh, my gosh.

We found out the day before I left. So I told my wife that she had to take it to the mechanic and get a slip. Ryan's like, I'm so sorry you're going to have to deal with it. Bye. See you. Damn. Yeah. Yeah.

Big time difference as well. Not your problem at all. Yeah. Time's on chance. At all. I can't take calls through the night. I'm sleeping. I'm sorry.

Yeah. I'm offline girl. Sorry. A tarpa, just to let you guys know, is a stands for Tony and Ryan podcast. So anyone that listens to the show is Atah. So they're like your cult babies. Is that right? Oh, yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Nice. Do you? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Do cult babies find other cult babies in the wild? And do you hear your stories? Yeah, they do. There's a few of them in like in relationships. That's amazing. Yeah. That's it. A lot of them, because we have them,

they've got the group chat function in Patreon. When they actually finally meet out some of our shows, for example. Yeah. Then they're locked in for life. That's what our tapas are doing as well, meeting each other and having a great. It's the coolest thing. In Dublin,

there were those two girls that I could have sworn had been friends for 15 years. They were like drinking together. They were hug and having the best time. and then we're chatting after and took a photo and like, I just met this bitch in the line out of the front. They both came alive. That's so crazy.

That's crazy. I would never. Yeah, I would never. 100%. I don't have the social confidence. No way. Impossible. Yeah, same.

So that is what a TARPA is. Okay, cool. And so Tapa is sent through some normal or nasty for us here today. Cool, cool, cool. Tapa Rowan. Hi, Rowan. Asked ducking your head while driving under a bridge. So every time I go through under a bridge,

I duck my head down. I know that it won't make an impact, but for some reason it's just a natural reaction for me. I'm not that tall. Which I think is... Oh, was that tall gear? Sorry. No, I think that's important.

Is that normal or no for the group? Normal. Normal? You think that's normal? Yeah, I do that. You duck your head in the car. Yeah. When you're going through a tunnel.

Yeah. Little one. Yeah. Little one. Little one, just to be sure. To be fair, nah, in a car park, though, in a car park,

when you're going, especially your car, if you've got a high car and you're going into a car park. Okay, it's a difference. I'm not ducking because I'm, I think it's going to hit my head. I'm probably looking to see if it's hit in the roof. Oh,

I only have it. Shut up. No, you know, that's an excuse. Because you can see it there. Yeah, but I'm also like slowly revving in like this. I'm not ducking because of the thing.

I ducking because of the thing. I just have a tiny hatchback, so I don't, I don't need it. That's not. No, but you know, like I'm just... Tony drives a naughty. It's just like a skateboard underneath, I could say.

How did you drive? An A3. Nice. I love it. Nice. That's all that matters. Why did you? No, no, no, no.

Why did you? No, no. I met a tab by the other day. She goes, I work for Mercedes. It's nicer than your car. Oh. Thank you so much. And I was like, I can't afford that.

Wow. Like, this is fine. Yeah. That's our order. That is our order. Thank you. Yeah. No, that's how old.

Although, here's a hack for people that want to feel tall. is that when you walk through a door frame, if you just duck a little bit, it makes you feel like you're tall. Do you reckon? Yeah, because I had to play volleyball and everyone was fucking tall and I was like the one short guy

and then everyone would walk through the room and have to duck. Like that guy Tommy that lived in your building. Oh my God, like I was so tall, it was like a tree. So he always ducked walking into a room and then I would as well and I just felt like we were the same.

I mean, my short girl hack is that I always wear platform sneakers. Yeah, that's cool. Oh, wow. Yeah, that's an actual platform. Thank you so much for saying that. You're welcome. Charlie.

I'm gonna do you want to try this on? What the hacks? I don't think it would fit. Yeah. But appreciate it. Yeah.

Yeah. I got my feet. Yeah. You're not. Unless your size 11 by any choice. I'm not. There be golden. Um,

I appreciate it. I'm so small. That's okay. Just a cute little girl. I'm so dainty. Just a cute little girl. Nathaniel has a normal honor. Hi Nathaniel.

People assuming because you host a podcast together and get along really well that you're also a couple. normal or nah. It's pretty normal. It's pretty normal. Do you guys get that a lot? Every day. Yeah.

Every day. And so at what lengths do you have to go to like dispel that room? I would just let it happen? I think if anything, I lean into it. Yeah. Kiss more. Does it annoy you how much I lean into it? Nah, because again, it's the law of S&G.

Yeah. So it doesn't bother me at all. L-O-R-A. Yeah. So when... You're coming in clutch today, boy. Sorry. It took us a really long time

to figure out difference between Al Oari and L-O-R-A and L-W whatever the fucking other one L-D-W. L-A-W. And so now every time we say it, Tony has to spell it so I'm like, thank you. So I understand. D-Certain. Yeah.

It's for the room. Yeah. People thought we were a couple for the longest time. And even if you like, Googled our names like, hypothetically, it was like, are Tony and Ryan together? Yeah. Yeah. And we still get it all the time.

And then like, when I got engaged, everyone was like, They're finally engaged and we're like, no, no, no, no, not to each other. Like, not to each other. Like, he's married, beautiful wife. Like, I, there's someone, you know, like, yeah, but we still get it all the time. Yeah. But boys and girls can't be friends. You know that old thing.

Why is that? Like, the, like, the world just doesn't. They're like, oh, they're obviously fucking. And then, because we make dirty jokes with each other, people are like, oh, her husband must feel really, like, really bad about that. I'm like, oh, we're just friends. That's frustrating. You know?

I'm sorry, that's boring. Although we get that, but we joke about fingering each other. I feel like you don't, I don't, feel like you guys don't make those jokes. Oh,

no. Oh, we don't finger each other. We don't finger each other, but, um, there's not, I was gonna say,

there's no, there's no, there's no, let you land, yeah. We make other jokes. I don't, I haven't,

I haven't, I haven't, I don't, I haven't, I don't, I don't think I've ever, do you want to try it now? Um,

um, um, That might be the funniest that you've ever said. That was unbelievable. I'm actually hilarious. That was quick. Now, this next harper has made a clarification just so we're all clear on something. Okay.

And I just think that they might not have needed to clarify. That's okay. They've called themselves lasagna la single. Lazzania, And then she says, just to let you know, that's not my real name. I just wanted to stay anonymous, but just wanted to be clear. Well, yeah, I mean, what's a lasagna between friends? Yeah.

Yeah, there we go. Pretty easy misconception. My man came over. He bought flowers. We had lunch. We watched two hours of Lizzie McGuire. Hot. And then he dumped me.

Oh. On the way out, he said, I left a lasagna in the fridge for you. My mom made it. I told her last night I was going to dump you. She felt bad for you, so she whipped up a lasagna. Not let's suck my flaps. Fuck you. You're going to lead me on with the lasagna and the Lizzie McGuire and then dump me anyway.

Getting a consolation lasagna when someone dumps you, normal or nah. Oh my God. Of all the, what would your dumping meal of preference for you? To make for someone and to receive? Yeah. That's a great question. They wouldn't be the same, surely. Yeah, they're not.

They can't be the same. I would make them their favorite, whatever their favorite dishes. That's a smack in the face. I know, but it makes them, similar to this lasagna thing, lasagna Lys McGuire,

she thought she's about to have a great night with her boyfriend. Yeah. And then the rug was literally pulled from under that. I think it's easier for me that way. Huh? It's easier for me that way. Because they're comfortable.

It's easier. It's easy. I see. Yeah, this is over. Oh, I get what you mean. It's easier for me.

I think that if I was getting dumped, I don't want any food. I just want you to just say it. I think naturally, that's what, everyone want but I don't think I'm I'm a that's not the question don't you know I'm a big pussy so I need to like yeah psych myself up for stuff like that same I don't like confrontation oh I hate confrontation but if you give them the like their favorite meal though is that just like and I could have cooked

this for the rest of your life yeah imagine it was the best version of their favorite yeah and you just walked out the door and they're like fuck that's delicious and I'm never going to taste that or that again yeah all that that clutch it's okay yeah the game was a game, man. Okay, well, what meal would you want? Then it's a good for you. And I obviously don't know I'm getting dumped. I could make that mac and cheese for you if you want.

With the red lester. Three cheese? Three cheese. Your lactose intolerant, bro. Yeah, but I think. Yeah, but you're shooting. Yeah. I think that would make me feel better.

She doesn't even pay attention to you. Yeah. Just make me anything with a lot of cheese. Break my heart so I can just shit in a toilet. Yeah. And that's me. You got to do the shit in the toilet. I mean, that's the best place.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Cool. How about you, James? something like because my stomach's gonna be in nuts. But no, but you don't know you're getting dumped.

Yeah, but I'm just, I'm not. You don't know you're getting dumped though. Yeah, no, but I still have to eat it after they've left me. Oh, yeah. Oh, so we're eating at post-breakup. Yeah, there's a, oh, no, there's a lot of there's a lasagna in the fridge for you. Of course, of course, of course.

My bad, my bad, my, but I was thinking I was gonna scrant before I get tough. No, bro. Oh, okay, okay. Sorry, that might be that the most English thing I'm here. We need a subtitle for that and then I thought I was, And then he's scrant before I got served. Wow, that is a, yeah, it's very, yeah.

English slang. It is very English. You know what they call English slang here? Slang? That has ruined my day. That's so upsetting. Yark. It was that the joke, not the gasp, yeah.

It was that the joke. It was not the joke. Just a flat yuck. Yuck. Yuck. that flight yuck. I've never felt more demoralized in my life. I feel so disrespectful.

That is the best reaction I've ever had from a flat yuck. I love dishing out at like an empty room. Yuck. And then that hit home. So thank you for that. No, that was amazing. And I think I need to work a flat yuck into my life. I've never flat yucked.

Really? No. Oh, it feels good, dude. A flat yuck. Wow. Where do you drop it though? Like where are you? I mean that was pretty great.

Like she's trying to justify a terrible joke and she's doing the whole knee slap thing and you're just like yuck. All right. James, I'm gonna need. You hate me. Hey, hey, to be fair, you came out strong and you came out swinging and this is just,

this is what you get. Yeah, it's like a really good humbling piece. Yeah. It feels like you need that slight pause just before it. You do, you do. Can you give me a shit joke? And then just to see if I've got the timing right and then I'm gonna yuck you back.

But I love you. I just, I'm just pretending. I'm just like, cool, cool, cool, Cool, cool. These guys are recording a podcast in someone else's house. Waste. Waste. That felt way too real.

I felt like cool people were making fun of me. Right. Anyway, and yuck. Now you gave it too much. Yeah, wasn't too much. It wasn't flat. All right, let me go. Yuck.

That was a good yuck. That was a very. That was a really good yawks. Yeah. I'll get there. I'll find a time. Yeah, you'll find a time.

Another one that I really like is if someone's like going hard at someone in a shopping center or like like in public is like yelling going. Who yells? Yeah. I love it. Yeah. But you. I yell. You know that you.

You say that. Oh, trigger me. Yeah. That would trigger me. Yeah. I'm thinking about it out. Yeah. Yeah.

I'll think about. Yeah. Who yells? There was this guy once and he was like raising his voice at a. We were in like a. banquet like somewhere where people get that. And Tony goes, imagine yelling here. Oh no.

Yeah. Nah. And he was at tomorrow. You trigger me. But I was like, she said it so loud and I was like, oh, wow. Honestly, I was high for five days. Yeah. I bet.

That's a great feeling. Yeah. Oh, like the power I held up. That's so. Thank you. Thank you so much. Imagine yelling here. Oh.

That's so cold. I'm not bitch enough. Yeah. I just realized I'm not bitchy enough. Yeah. Yeah. same same the yuck was pretty mean so yeah it was good um how did you think to like joke about filming in someone else's house so quickly yeah you really had that yeah hypothetically if you would

make fun of us and you were just like already halfway through the sentence ready to go just uh uh you just pick up on your surroundings yeah yeah yeah you just pick up with the energy really yeah yeah yeah yeah you guys don't seem proud to be recording here so why should i I'm joking I'm joking I'm trying my hardest team in I'm sorry I like that you don't have it in you. That's like a good thing. Okay, cool. Sorry, sorry, sorry.

So Tony, so she can be a real easy. I bet. Yeah. Oh, do we not say the C, like, you guys know,

like, yeah. We said this today. I love, I love the word. I use it, this, the thing with me, I use the C bomb like it's the F bomb.

Yeah. For me, it's just a word to use to replace something. It's not, I'm not being specific about the C word. You're not calling someone a c. Yeah. Yeah. But also in Australia, like calling someone a good,

is that's like a nice thing to say. That's like a term of India. But if you said to someone, your mate, that's a read. That's bad. Okay. Yeah. What does that mean? So say I,

like you hang out with him, you flog. Yeah. What does a frog mean? Oh, yeah, like a cockhead, yeah. A co-haired, yeah. But you're all made as, say like I said, let's invite. Yeah, let's invite the boys onto our show. Yeah.

And then say you were all. And then Tony goes, oh, they're your mates. Oh, okay. That's what we used to do. When we were younger, we stood up with your ting, isn't it? Oh, yeah, your team. So if there was like a really mean girl, or if there was like a really just like,

just hideous person and then we'll be talking about there and then you'd be like, oh, remember Sarah from that, oh, you're thing. Oh, that's your thing. Oh, yeah, your tink. Ting is your, your, N-G. Yeah, yeah, that's your boyfriend. Yeah, that's your tink.

Oh, yeah, you're saying that. I've heard you guys say that and I had no idea what you were saying, but you sounded so fucking cool saying it. Oh, thank you. Yeah, we don't have that. I don't know what it means, but I respect the attitude. It felt, it felt good. Australians have really cool slang though.

Yeah. But if, but if you left and Tony goes, oh, they were good. That would be like. That's nice. Really? Okay. Say less. I don't think I've ever said that word.

Really? Yeah, you look how uncomfortable around the word. Never said it. Could today be your day? No. I say, I thought about it before I even moved my mouth. I say when I'm driving sometimes. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. You call them a dirty. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. DFC. DFC.

I give him a DFC. A dumb fucking . Dirty fucking . Oh. Yeah. Even the way he said it. Yeah. That was aggressive.

That was aggressive. That was a, but I'm a bit turned off. It's like I can't. Like my mind and my vagina. Yeah. They don't know. Tony's right.

Like, oh my God. That's funny. So even if you were to say it as we all acknowledge in a positive way and looked in the camera and said, Tony and Ryan, good. Okay, I'll do that. No, you don't have to do that. I do at the end.

Okay. Yeah, because you haven't made up your mind yet. Yeah, you wouldn't say that if you didn't mean it true. No, so true. So, Tony, stop fucking giving them something. Yeah, sorry. Yeah. D.

D. Oh my God. I have mental health issues. Um, finally, we've been having a bit of a debate because I asked to borrow Charles's shaver the other day. And everyone just thought that was the most disgusting fucking thing ever. It's pretty disgusting. If you had to choose between borrowing, say you guys are on the road, you're about to go on a tour, the other one asks,

they want to borrow a shaver or a toothbrush, which are you more like, like if you had to choose one. It would have to be the shave. Ooh, as in just here, not here? They're using it. They just say, I need a shaver and you have to say yes or no. And then you have to use it after. Like, you're not just going, have it.

Yeah. It could never be the toothbrush. Two brush is impossible. Yeah, toothbrush is. Yeah. You're choosing toothbrush, aren't you? I'm choosing toothbrush. Really?

Oh, I don't want to use your razor that's been around your pussy hole. And you'd rather use the toothbrush. I think a toothbrush is okay. There's more bacteria in your tongue than there is your vagina. Yeah, I think that's okay. Because you're using toothpaste. It's all getting clean in there. I understand the rationale, but nah, no, bro.

That's horrible. A shaver is rank. It is. The thought of someone else's hair. A hair not attached to someone is just the most tragic thing. on earth. Like, you're,

you're telling me that there's something grosser than a rogue hair. On a razor plate. Like, that's upsetting. That's pretty, that's pretty disgusting.

I don't know. What's worse than, I don't know, like a tonsil stone. If it's doing toothbrushes. Yeah, that's up there.

Yeah. That's up there. And one, in one of the toughest segues in modern media history. Up next, we're talking about daddy fantasy. Hi, Charlotte from Cheshire in the UK.

Hi, I'm Brian. You from Norwich in the UK. Hi, this is again from Northern Rivers, New South Wales. You're listening to Tony Ryan. A massive shout out to a few of our champion tippers over at our Patreon. Thank you very much. Keeping the lights on. Joshua David Villa. Thanks, Joshua.

Kylie Bailey, good on you, Kyle. Steph Verde Flint, Evan Keith, Justin. Good on you, Justin. Tom, Randy Schmidt. Tell me about it. Jesse, Itbivani and Jenny Brown. Good on you, Jenny Browns with a G. No.

Huh. No. Jenny Brown. It's interesting. Nice. Oh, I don't know how I feel about that. Oh, thanks, Jenny. Yeah.

We'll take it, Jenny. Don't worry. That's a whole name. Yeah, we'll take it. As well as Tony discovering podcast recently. How many books have you read this year? Oh, do you remember, Charles? Like 10, I think.

I think it was like 10 or 12. Yeah. Yeah. Well, blonde. Thank you so much. So I know your daddy fantasy at times or no daddy. Do you know daddy fantasy or are you are daddy fantasy? We've never been in the same room together, but I'm, I've heard of him.

Yeah. Okay. And do you have a reading or are you a reader? Because I'm not a reader whatsoever. I want to be a reader though. I feel like it would. Do you know how you're being filmed? The judge it on your face.

The thing is, I saw him and he didn't see me see him. Yeah. I saw the face of it. Tony's new to the land. of, are you reading like smutty books or where are we? Yeah, I've been reading like romance. Oh, look at that. Yeah.

I'm lots of it. Yeah. I've been reading. So I did read like the fairy smart. Mm-hmm. I did not like it. You didn't? I'm so sorry.

I didn't write it. It's fine. What didn't you like about it? I just didn't like having to remember and try and like think about all of the names of shit. Like, so they just give all these really long crazy names to stuff. And I'm like, well, am I. reading about the pussy or am I reading about like avant-garde's fling flung down to Arndon? Yeah.

Yeah, I get it. Like, I can't do that. Do you, a physical book, Kindle. I'm a Kindle guy. Yeah. Same. So Tony was reading her Kind of at a doctor's office and kind of just killing time, try not to scroll on her phone and suddenly realize she's surrounded by all these guys in the doctor's

office reading. Yeah. I was reading this like really horny chapter of a book. and I felt like, like, should I put this away? Like, oh wow. I felt cheeky. Yeah, okay.

I felt myself going red. I was like, really? But do you feel like you have to pick your moments of like where? Or have you ever been reading in a spot where you're like, oh, maybe this isn't cool? Oh, that's a very good question. I do most of my read-in.

Are you filtering? I feel like there's something you're not telling us. No, no, no, for real. trying to think about it. I'm trying to, because I'm trying to, I know where I do most of I'm trying to think where I've read most of like the dirty scenes. Um, very late at night with a candle. Actually, it actually is late at night in bed, which is weird, but and it's also super weird because it's always for the peer view of the girl and I'm like, yeah, struggling to relate. But, um, I do often like when I'm, like, so you're sitting there in what I've featured is the dark

room with the candle on and it's like, and he fucks my boy. Yeah, literally, it's like, and the length of him was a stout. And I'm like, yeah, he's throbbing. Good for you, bro. Nice. He's throbbing member slid between my legs and things like, like, that's how they write that shit. It is literally that. And then yeah, it's just like, and he feasted on me like, fucking whatever, whatever.

And I'm like, cool, man. Would you prefer me in it from the males perspective? Um, I actually don't think, weirdly enough, actually don't think I would because guys are just like so boring with it. So I can imagine it just be like, oh, fuck the shit out of her. You know, he's not right in it. Yeah. You see what I'm saying? I get it.

I get it. Like a fuck boy doesn't write the boy. I get it. Like, it's still good. Fair, fair, fair, fair. To be fair, I'm really, Frost and Starlight right now. Yeah.

And that's a POV book. So I'm hoping we get some sex POV from either Reese or Cassian. Okay. I'm hoping for it. No? No. It's all just. Spoilers.

Yeah. Okay, never mind. Well, there goes that. Would you read it if it would. was from the male perspective and it was good. I would read it. If it was good and I would read it 100%. Yeah. I'm just not used to males being so articulate.

So it would be, it would be interesting to say the least. That's an articulate answer. Maybe you're the guy to write it. Would you write it? Yeah, I would. You should. I really would. It would go so well.

Would Daddy Fantasy be the author? I think it would have to be. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That would, yeah, credit would have to. go to him. Funny enough, if you had literally messaged me about this,

is why he smirking. He messaged me about this, like, what, two, three weeks ago and sent me a long voice note about this is something you should do. And then we haven't spoken about it since. So I know he's proud of himself right now.

We'll talk about it right now. What are the pros and why it's stopping you from doing that? Because I want to say it. We're busy. That's just short. It's a lot. It's the time. We're busy.

Now, we are super busy. I think. Stop saying yes to stuff. Yeah. I think after tour, once I've settled down, I will have some time to do it.

And once we're in more of a routine, like at the minute, I think we've said, like, we record usually, it's like Mondays to Wednesdays and then Thursdays to Sundays, we're pretty much chilling. That has not been the case for the last, like, God knows how long now. And it won't be a case for the next two months. But after that, it will be back to normal and I'll just have four days a week of downtime to actually focus on it. So I could probably do it.

So that would be also. We love chilling and doing nothing, but we also just get hell excited for stuff. So when we're, as soon as you get a tense to chill, oh, you can do it. And we just go, sounds great, let's do it. Let's do it. Let's restructure something. Or like, yeah. Let's do this.

Oh, I've got a new idea for this. Great. And then it's like, and then in seven years, then we'll be chill. Right. And it just, the day has never come. Yeah. We had this discussion recently where we felt like we're paying for like last year's decisions this now.

Yeah. So it's always like, oh, this thing and this thing and this thing. And it would have been like December last year and it's only creeping up now. Like, oh, do you mean when you agreed to do such and such and I'm like, fucking out. Yeah. It's like when you save a bit of. money on an early morning flight.

And when you book it, you're like, hell, fucking, yeah. Take my cash, fuck you. And then two days before you go, bitch, I'm waking up at three to say 50 bucks. Yeah, disgusting. That was perfect. Yeah. By the way. Yeah.

Don't just skip over that. That analogy was perfect. 10-10. It's a bot on. 10-10 analogy. Well played. Thank you so much. Do you want to know why that's fresh in our mind?

So when we leave, when we leave London for Italy, Charles, what time is our flight? I'll fly it's at 7 a.m. But we're flying out of Gatwick. That's miles away. It was the only flight we could get. So the car is coming at three. Three.

Yeah, that makes sense to get there for five to fly at seven. Yeah. Fuck that. Sorry guys, man. You're gonna do an all night area. She's gonna try to sleep. No, I'll be like. Charles, what are you gonna try?

I'll probably no one night. Yeah. Charles kissed a local girl last night. Did you? Yeah. Yeah. She's called Millie. Millie.

Oh, that's such a London name. Fucking out. They said a kiss the local girl. Mixing and mingling with the circles. Nice. The crate unwashed out there. Oh my God. Wow.

How was it? Yeah, she was good. Do they kiss the same here? Yeah, they do. Yeah. Oh, that's nice. Do they French kiss in London? You know what they call that in France?

They kiss. Well played, dude. Well played, can we delve in? Yeah, where were you at? Delve, delve, delve. Delve, delve. Um, we were at just a bar, like a... The dolphin. The dolphin, yeah, it's a karaoke bar around the corner.

Were you there? No. Was it you? He wishes. Clean, clean, clean, close, nice, nice, nice, clean. Clean. Okay, in the pub in Hackney. Fair play. Let's go.

Not bad. Um, we finish our shows with like a little, you love to see it, a little recommendation, something you've seen that you've liked. Have you guys got a little sign to share with the tarpa's watching? Oh my God, yes. Well, other than again, I just bang on it all the time. Love on a Spectrum. Yeah.

I don't think enough people talk about Love on the Spectrum. Oh my God, I love Love on the Spectrum. It's the best show. Been built again. Yeah. No, I love that. It is the most heartwarming show. It's the best show ever created.

I love it. I'm certain of it. So we're not in Australia. He built it. He's Australian. Kean. Yeah, Kean. Sean.

Nice. I get it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, because it started in Australia. We're back on the bridge. We are, we are, we are, we are. That bridge is fucking London Bridge. Do we get, I don't know what that means. Do we get the one, have we got our own one in Australia?

There is an Australian one as well, but like the OG is like, The last two seasons were Australian. Yeah, and then now it's got like American, there's an American one. If they do a UK one, I would lose my fucking shit. Yeah, it's such a beautiful show. Yeah, exactly. That's the point. I want the cast on all the time, but they never hit it.

Is it just like, wholesome as far? Like is it, whole. Okay, so, all right. I've been saying it. pitch it to me. Pitch it. Right. So imagine meeting someone who can't lie and then you ask them, how do you feel about me knowing they physically can't lie? And they say all the things you wish anyone could ever say about you in the nicest possible way. And you know for a fact that's how they truly feel. You go to lunch with them and then after lunch, you're like, oh, like, it was nice meeting you.

And then they'll be like, no, no, it wasn't nice meeting you. It was actually, it was like really difficult for me and like they go they go like oh do you want to see me again and they go no thanks no yeah they're like respectful they're not assholes but it's just yeah they're and they're like they're like oh lie to me they can't like people like i really struggle with dates and they're like yeah it's probably because your haircut to be honest but because of all that yeah literally once again had that ready to go yeah yeah um but yeah and then but I'll send his shots today. But then they'll be, but then you meet the one and they'll be like, I think I'm in love with you.

And I think you are the one for me and we should be together because everything about you, I'm completely excessive. And you're thinking, oh shit, this guy's being dead serious. Which I think is so beautiful. It's unbelievable. So awesome. And the full range of human emotion as well, like, and connection. It is unbelievable. So there's some like tricky ones that might not work out at first.

But when they find they're, they're. right ones. I mean, Madison and Tyler, they're engaged now. Yeah, Madison's like, what a success story.

Spoilers. Spoilers. I was so sad when Abby and David broke up. Genuinely cried when I saw that on Instagram.

We suspected it because we were looking before the season came out. I was thinking, we were looking at their Instagrams. Something's up here. Some is up

and then they didn't even declare it until the end of the season. Yeah. Oh. And also when you see people have hard dates, like you bury yourself and you're so invested

in this character and then they'll go on a first date and you're terrified for them and you're trying to go sober You want to protect them. Yeah, 100%. Who's the guy that wore the seat? What's his name?

The black guy that wore the seat. Oh, Logan. Logan, yeah, yeah. Logan was my guy this season. I absolutely love Logan. I love Logan. And he was just so, he was just looking for the one. And he, like, put it all.

And he was like, I really need a girl with curly hair. And then this girl came up and, like, he found her so stunning. And he immediately told her, I don't even care that you don't have curly hair. We have no context. Zero context. I don't even need a girl with curly hair. I'm just like, whatever hair you have is what the hair I want. You don't need.

Curly hair, Tony, you just, whatever, I love you. Thank you. That's really beautiful. Yeah. I'm engaged, but that's okay. Any recommendations for you? So for me, I've currently been watching, do you guys watch anime or all? No.

Are you interested in watching anime? I'm interested in, like, I'm... I'm not against it. I'm willing to try. I'm not against it. But I think there is just so much. It's like hard to know where to start. Of course, of course, that you need like a step in stone type of situation.

Yes, yeah. But one I've currently been trying to watch for years is called One Piece. Isn't there a huge thing about that? Because Netflix said they were going to put the next season on and then they never made it or something. Something along those lines. Some drama. I am, so for context, there's like over like maybe 1,200 episodes of this anime or roughly 1,200 episodes. I am just, just underneath halfway and it's getting juicy.

You've got this to yourself. Yeah. I've been binging it all week last week. Really? It's been getting juicy. Juicy. It's crazy right now. Say that again.

Really? Yeah, yeah, yeah. What the fuck? You get that stum, bro. It's cooking up. No. You what? I wasn't watching it.

Stum. Shum. Kept a choir. Stum. Shht-U-M. Stum. Kept that schum. You guys sound cool when you talk.

Oh no, we just sound like fucking losers. No, you don't. I love the accent. I love the accent. Where do we stand where a show takes 600 episodes to get cooking then? Listen. And it's just starting to get good. This is the reason why I said it's taking years.

Give it the first 600 Eps, then decide. It's rough. This is why I said it's taking me years to get to this point. Yeah. Because it's been, it's starting in like 1990. Something. So the animation obviously is terrible in comparison to like the new age

anime that I've been watching. Yeah. So now that I'm actually getting to a stage where everything is kind of like fitting in. I'm like, oh, I'm locked in now. And what kind of storylines are going on in the... So the current storyline is Luffy, who's the main guy, he's the MC.

He's trying to save his brother from being assassinated. and the... That's a bit of you. I like an assassin or a secret. Yeah, the crew that his brother's with, he's called, his brother's name is Ace. They're all pirates, by the way, so this is all on C type shit.

Ace, Ace, that's a hell of a thing is so. Let's put him on a boat. Ace left his crew to avenge his boss because one of the former crew members killed someone and he was like, I'm not going to stand for this.

And the boss's name is called Whitebeard. Whitebeard, you can't stand for this either. So I'm going on a full-blown journey to find this guy and kill him. So that's his backstory. So when Ace got captured,

Whitebein and the whole crew came to where they were and so did Luffy, the brother. And the fights that's been happening, chaos. Sorry, watching you lock in telling us. Absolute. Like, chaos.

Yeah. Tony, how would you describe that story? Oh my God. Turn out. Juicy. Juicy. I'm glad you didn't stay strong. My learning.

My learning. Is that okay? That's a double click from these guys. Yeah, that was, and you, in sync as well, it's really nice.

Oh, that's so nice. I could only dream if they can. Um, my love to see it is just his like really stupid meme that I saw. Gone. Oh, it made me really love and it says,

it's this product. That sounds like a pirate said it. It does. My lady, pardon me if I'm being too bored, would you perhaps be interested in receiving a load of misman? Because the product is called misman. That's so fucking stupid.

It is stupid. What is that? What is that? I don't even know you can pass this over. Yeah. I have no idea what it is. It looks like a honey or? But I just saw it and laughed so hard at Miss Simon and then.

It's got honey good. Galette Fulette. Msemen. Oh. What does that? Nice. Good meme. Thanks.

Would you like Msemen? Thank you. I knew it was your flavor of meme. Thank you. My love to see it is from Tapa, Megan Ranch. Hi, Megan Rance. Huge. Like the sauce.

Her puppy bear has just turned one. They rescued him. Have a look at bear there. Cute. What a sweetheart. Have a look at bear. Hi, bear. Are you guys dog people?

I like dogs. Yeah? Do you have pets? I don't. I would rescue a dog, you know. The dog might rescue you. Yeah. I love that take.

I love that take. Nice. I was like not in the best of times when. When you got BJ. I got my dog, BJ. We rescued him. We didn't name him that. We didn't name him that.

Yeah, no, sorry. I saw the soul. Yeah. He was a rescue and they're like, yeah, he's named. Now, you're going to have to shut the fuck up for a second, I feel. I think, let's just let that lie for a second. Wow. That took my breath away.

Yeah. Oh, you weren't in a good place when I gave you that BJ. Wow. Like, what's that got to do fucking anything? Right. Sorry, sorry. Your dog, BJ. I forget that that's like not a cool thing to call a dog.

Oh, no, it's actually true. It just comes out. on nowhere. Yeah, and that's what I say about it. Yeah. So, well, played.

Good joke. They said, oh, this is this rescue. His name's BJ and my wife's like, oh, okay. And anyway, but I wasn't in the best way. He has rescued me.

Yeah. And we've only just heard that saying about, they don't, you don't rescue them. They rescue you. And I think that's what happens with bear here. And so because he's turned one,

she said, I invited all my friends over and we had a little bet and everyone had to like chuck five bucks in and guess what his weight was because he was real, skinny and like under maris. Oh, I hope no one does that at my bed then, buddy. Oh my God.

What a horrific time. I've never seen two-grown men try so hard not to laugh. That was funny. Well played. Oh, God. We're killing it today, man. Yeah, you guys are on form today. I hope you appreciate yourselves because you're really, like, crushing it.

The rest of this story means absolutely nothing. Yeah. I really appreciate that. I love to see it. But it's really nice. No, say it. So whoever was closest with the way they got to choose. Can you just imagine?

Okay, guys, before we start the pod, what do you reckon Tony weighs? Chuck five bucks in the hat. And whoever gets closest. Fucking hell. Whoever gets closest gets the lasagna in the fridge. Wouldn't that be? The consulate.

like your lasagna. The most awful way. She can't eat it. Yeah, the reason you're good at small talk is you're not asking how much they weigh as must a lot. Yeah, yeah.

Nice to beat you, bro. What are you doing? What are you packing? To be fair, oh my God. I didn't even tell you when we're, this is why I don't do small talk.

When we were at Joe Martin's podcast the other day, yeah. The sound guy was doing me up. And he had the smallest feet I've seen on a man. Oh yeah. Yeah. And I was like, what's like shoes me, bro?

Yeah. You did. And then he was like, he was like, I'm a six and I'm fucking short. And I was like, oh, man. Oh, you're like, oh, I've hit a nerve. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And I was like, six is small. Well, it was striking what I was looking. Striking. I just feel like I would never notice what. He's like, it's like someone to cut him off. Yeah, this is, this is, I wouldn't notice. That's why I was shocked at I noticed. Yeah.

Yeah. And I was like, oh, damn. That's some small feet. It was clearly the security of his and he was pissed. I was like, that's why shut up. Fuck. This is why I don't talk. But it was too late.

Because you'd already... If I had size six feet, I would buy 11 shoes and just stuff stuff in the end of them. I'd just figure out, man. Yeah, literally. Yeah. Fuck. Fuck.

You do suck at some old talk, dude. Parrowing. Parrowing. Whoever was closest to the weight, they got to choose the local animal shelter and all the cash from the bets went to the shelter. Oh, that's cool. So they had a party for bear.

He got lots of pets and treats and one local shelter in London got $150. Oh. That's a good idea. That's awesome. Gentlemen, thank you so much for coming on the show. No, thank you for having us. Gentlemen. I've never said that word in my life.

It's okay. You know, it's important you know that he doesn't say that. I don't say that. He's uncomfortable. How did it feel? Terrible for me. I felt like I was trying too hard to be like proper and like sincere. The other day Ryan went to the barber and kept calling him brother.

And that's come up a lot too. No, that was in Dublin actually. Yeah. That's fine though. If you were a barber Yeah. And you only took cash. Yeah.

Right. Would you mention that before you started cutting someone's hair? Yes. And I also have it on the, it would be on a window. It would be very visible. It would be very visible. You've got to let people know.

Yeah. I don't know if this is off air chat. What happened? Did you have something like running with a barber in prison? Yeah. It's not, it's not a fair. What bastard?

Yeah. I've been very vocal about him. What happened? Fucked him. Yeah. He. Oh, like just did a bad job.

Royally fucked my hair up. Yeah. Like royally, royally, royally. And like, he cut my hairline like, what, like an inch above. And then tried to style it out by like, razoring the stubble down here as if I wouldn't notice. So not only was I bald here, it was red raw. He fucked me up so badly. And then he blamed to me.

I was so ready to blame anyone and everyone. I remember blaming you in the taxi. And then we- Before we got to the taxi. Oh yeah, I remember, I remember. Yeah, because you found it. And you got, it's your fault. Yeah, he found this guy.

I found the barber. I went to the barber that I found. It was a shop. I got recommended this specific barber from this specific shop. Yeah. So I sat with him first, pause. And then the other guy came out and said,

oh, bro, I'm gonna do, I'm gonna do James. And then obviously, James went in the chair and the rest was history, I guess. Because my guy was, it wasn't the best, but it wasn't terrible. Yeah.

So I was okay with it. And you got a good hairline. Thank you, bro. And so within half an hour, suddenly he finished. You were in a cap for the rest of the tour. Yeah, yeah. I remember what made me most angry is that when we were talking about it outside, we got in the Uber because we're going to the gym after.

And as we were talking about it, I could see in the rear view, the guy, the Uber driver was looking back and pissing himself. Pissing himself laughing. I forgot about that. I was like, nah, no, no, no, it's the worst day in my life. And that's when you mate goes, oh, no, it's actually not. that bad and you go, it is. This stranger who wants a five-star rating is risking it.

Who wants me to tip in. He doesn't lose his last in the two-star review. He's pissed in himself. It's funny. Yeah, I was so upset. Thank you. I won't say gentlemen. No.

But thank you for coming. This is really, really fun. This was hilarious. Yeah, this was amazing. You guys are some good cunts. Oh! That's huge. That's fun saying it.

I felt disgusting. You know what? Yuck Yuck No No You went out on a limb And I appreciate that

And I respect it Yeah Yeah A real And a guy never To have to beat that No we won't beep that one Yeah

A guy never forgets his first time And I'm glad Your first time Was it really your first time Saying that word Yeah 100% It feels like it was my first time

Yeah Yeah I'm full of shame This is like First Whank Territory You got the post nut clarity of like

Yeah Yeah Oh my God Yeah Close the tab. Post-cab clarity. No, I regret everything. I can see everything.

Shit. Thank you so much. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. That was lovely. Bye, bye, bye, bye.