Toni and Ryan - Official Podcast Protocol

Episode Date: June 23, 2025

LOVE U !!!!!JOIN US FOR TARPaTHON 3 on PATREON!!! LIVE for Champion TARPers 9am AEST JUNE 28!!!Check out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toniandryanpodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Imagine waking up to breathtaking landscapes, vibrant culture and a welcoming community. New Zealand is calling. If you are a passionate early childhood primary or secondary school teacher, New Zealand says come teach us. With up to $10,000 New Zealand dollars in relocation support, now's the time. Make your move. Find out more about moving to New Zealand to teach at workforce.education.govt.nz. Open to existing qualified primary, secondary and ECE teachers.

Note that this grant is only dispersed after teachers arrived in New Zealand and meets the other accompanying criteria. This episode is sponsored by Audible. And if you're into psychological thrillers, then listen up, this is for you. Oh it is. Sacrilege Curse of the Mbewi is the new Audible original and it's bone chilling. Bone chilling. It stars Caleb McLaughlin, you know, Lucas from Stranger Things, and it follows the story of the Wallace family whose trip to a luxury game reserve in Zimbabwe quickly unravels. He unintentionally desecrates sacred ground and unleashes a supernatural force called the Mbuwi, a vengeful spirit born from centuries

of colonial oppression. We're talking possessed animals, shapeshifting horrors, a vengeful spirit rooted in generations of colonial trauma. Now Daschen, that's Caleb's character, he has to face this curse and his own past to save what remains of his family. It's written and directed by visionary creator Nyasha Hatendi and presented in spectacular Dolby Atmos. Think pulse-pounding suspense with powerful explorations of identity and privilege. Listen to Sacrilege, Curse of the Mbuie now. Go to sacrilege curse of the Mbui now go to audible.ca slash sacrilege. That's S A C R I L E G E. Amanda? Hello? Hello? Is that Amanda? Oh, Tony's doing an American voice. Are you Amanda? I'm sorry about that. Hello?

Hello? Is that Amanda? Oh, she thinks that I'm really American. I tricked her. I don't think that you did We're not gonna hear the end of this all day and I blame Amanda in Madison, Wisconsin We're not gonna hear the end of this all day and I blame Amanda in Madison, Wisconsin Damn it That was amazing Well, I don't think that anything could get me better than that but Madison no you live in Madison I fucked that right up Amanda will you approve this podcast?

Probably you will not approve it now because I just called you where you're from. She approved, take the win, take the win. Oh, it's Melbourne and Melbourne from... Live from Tony and Ryan. Yeah. Fuck. Amanda, do you approve today's podcast?

Of course I approve today's podcast. I know sometimes it's just the highest of highs and then just the lowest of lows. Do you like eating hash browns. Love you, Amanda. Hi, it's Amanda from Madison, Wisconsin, and I approve this podcast. ["Tuesday"]

Welcome to the show. Tuesday, we need the Tuesday. He's fun and he's cuddly. Hang on a Tuesday. If it is your first day, sorry, Sophie. Sorry, I misread it. We didn't do the same improv. Yeah, sorry. I hate that.

Yeah. Yeah. Charles is in, Sophie's in, Tony's in. I've got a social dilemma for the four of us. If it's your first day, by the way, I'd love to know your thoughts on this topic. Yep, you can tell us anywhere, but only where there's comments.

Charles finds a beanie in the store room. Yeah. I go, give me a go at that. I put it on, looked great, and now, ethically, morally, socially, if I look good in it, like I just keep wearing it, eh? I don't know. And I don't think I want a part of this

because I think that Charles deserves a chance to make the beanie look good. And also- He did, remember? I remember this is what you said. Ooh. Well, he did look a bit like my mum in 2013. Yeah. Pre-death, pre-death.

Oh, but like, death, close. Imminent. Yeah, close. Yeah. Yeah, it was a rough year for me and for her. You know what I mean. If it happens this week, will I make it? That's now the-

You're not terminal, Charles. You just can't wear a beanie. Charles, would you like another crack at the beanie? Sophie's wearing one next to you, she looks good. What I will say is I think that because we've styled it, one mil up, one mil down on you, let's leave it for now. But I think Charles, God bless his soul, should get a chance to style the cool beanie.

See if we can get it right. Hang on, hang on, hang on. I'm being very democratic here, diplomatic, whatever. Oh, radical left. Sorry. It's the blue beanie that's thrown me. Get a chance to style it and then you guys can fight it to figure out who gets it. I don't like it. Okay. Because- You don't like the beanie or you don't like him getting a chance? I like him getting a chance. What I didn't like is, I think when we were sitting at the desk the other day, we were joking about this old TV ad where this like, chic rocker had spent thousands of dollars

on his stuff. To look like he just kind of didn't give a fuck. Yeah. So I thought a Beanie was like, you're just chucking on. Nothing, you don't chuck anything on. Sex and the City lied to us. You can't just chuck anything on. Sex and the city lied to us. You can't just chuck anything on. And I've carried Carrie through my life for 38 years

and I chucked this beanie on. Oh, a mill down on the left, you need a little bit of hair out of the side, it's fine, cause you got a beard, the back's, I'm like, are we not just throwing beanies on? No, it's just like I didn't just throw this nail polish on or just throw these curtain bangs into place. You don't, you're not throwing anything together.

And I think that this is something that we all need to overcome. Well, you and I- It takes a lot to look like you don't give a fuck. You and I are having a few cocktails tonight. We are. A little off air chat. So why don't-

Did you bring a slutty outfit with you? Because I brought a slutty outfit with me to like change into at work, which feels a bit day to night. It is day to night, but someone didn't watch Sex and the City because I'm always prepared to go from day to night. So true. Yeah. Tony said yesterday are you gonna wear something slutty and I said I always do. Yeah which is my favorite answer to that question. Yeah okay so we've all agreed that we look good, we're gonna be slutty tonight. We look good. We're gonna have a few drinks tonight. When I wake up tomorrow a bit dusty I'm

gonna take a photo immediately and I will prove to you that some people do in fact, just wake up like this. I woke up like this. Classic. Right now though, let's do a tough confession. These are tough confessions. Tonyandryan.com.au, thank you to people who send them through.

They are annoyingly anonymous. We can't find out who sent it, so you can feel safe sending us your story and we really appreciate that you do, so thank you very much. We really can't find out who sent it to you. You can feel safe sending us your story. And we really appreciate that you do. So thank you very much. We really can't do the pod without people sharing their stories. And if it's your first time,

these can get a bit fucked up. Oh, we're pretty good today. Oh, okay. Disregard. This is cool though. I reckon you'll get, you'll be worked up. You want to dress slightly after hearing this story. I might just take my bra off.

I don't have to. You do you bro. Yeah, okay. I might take this beanie off. I wouldn't. Do you know what I will say is I think the beanie and the jumper isn't working. No, I think it's like soft, soft.

I think you need a soft and a hard, a la Sophie. If you take your bra off, I will be hard. My boobs are soft. They are not firm and one's bigger than the other. And that's okay. Always or just today? Always. Okay. My right one is a bit,

not like need a different bra size bigger, but like she's a slutty plump bitch. My right. Is that cause of like your jerking arm? That arm, that aside of my body is really strong. Some guys have got a jacked right arm and you go. You go okay. Yeah, part-time Popeye. Yeah. Yeah, but my left one it's a bit smaller but it also just doesn't like sit the same. I also notice a big difference between like if I just go like this my nipples are like hi Yeah, and then when they're where they are they're just like see ya. Yeah, that's very normal. I think it is

Yeah, but this boob is my favorite one. Yeah same. Yeah, I mean not to be Not big favorites, but that one is great. Yeah, I really appreciate that but see how Sophie's got soft on the top But then hard jacket. I thought you'd, so if you look at Sophie's nipples, um, Reduct that. That's what I thought you were saying. I've seen Sophie's nipples. And I was going to ask you to reduct it. Yeah, but you just don't talk about it.

Yeah. On a night out, sure. Oh, maybe not actually. Maybe. That's a shame. It would surprise me more if you had it. That's a shame. I'm actually upset to hear that.

It would surprise me more if you had it. Yeah. And that's how I can't believe it. Shocked. That's a shame. That's a shame. Have you seen mine? Where are you guys going tonight? Can I come?

Can I come? With that kind of attitude, you definitely can. It's just a see-through. Let's change that fact. Yeah. Let's go to fucking... Where should we go? Yeah, let's go. Let's go to one of those like-

Let's go to Urban Surf! Yes. Yeah. I'll get a tit out on the surfboard. Surfboard. Do you have to wear a wetsuit there? You should. Especially this time of year. It's my number 6 rule of life. It's my number 6 rule of life. What? Hang on.

It's harder to pop a tit in a wetsuit. It's harder to pop a tit in a wetsuit Yeah Yeah Remember that guy that reckon he got jerked off in a wetsuit while he was diving in a cave Bullshit bullshit, bro fucking liar. I've won a wetsuit You can't jerk it for hours after that cuz it's all squashed in not only can you not pop a tit I can barely pop a tit in yeah wet suit wetsuit, fuck that's like rolling yourself into a fucking tomb.

A human dim sim. Yeah. Human dim sim. Human dim sim. Yeah, they wrap you up. Yum. Should we get a dim sim? Not a human one.

No, no. Like four humans. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like the cabbage and the meat and stuff. I saw a thing the other day that said that they were made in Bendigo. Is that right? I knew they were Aussie,

but I didn't think they were made in fucking Bendigo. Dim Sim, the origins is in Bendigo. Like that version of a Dim Sim. Do not Google that Charles. Get off the computer, close your laptop. No, genuinely that version of the Dim Sim is Australian, but I didn't know it was Bendigo. It says Melbourne's Chinatown

was where it like was developed. The fried Melbourne's Chinatown was where it was developed. The fried dim sim or dim sim as a whole? Well, that kind of, like the long dim sim. Yeah. That's like from Australia, it's Australian. What can't we do? Oh, agree. You were born here, the dim sim.

I mean, my two favourite things to put in my mouth. Yeah. These are top confessions. That deserves more, all good. Oh. You finally found yourself so hard, I'd say. These are top confessions! That deserves more, all good. You finally found yourself so hard, I see. Fuck, I cannot crack this guy! I'm trying to concentrate on the confession,

because I feel like I need to give it... Like, someone's said I'm in this secret society that I'm not supposed to be in. I'm breaking this news to the top as the least I can do is give them my attention. Okay, lay it on me. I'm in a high profile Instagram sext chat. What does that mean? I got added to a secret Instagram group chat full of insanely hot and insanely well-known European influencers. I get added to those a lot. I think it's spam.

At first I thought it was another spammy bot chat weird thing. Yeah. But when I clicked in, it was real people who were sending real videos and photos into replying to each other. When I clicked on their profiles, they were legitimate people with 100,000 followers each and they were all 12 out of tens. Is this a bit like how about journalists in America felt when they got added to that mean amount?

I didn't, I thought it, like she goes I thought it was a scam and it seems like you kind of go oh yeah here we fucking go again but someone that she'd been texting like a sexy guy she met on holidays invited her to like this group. So she's like, Oh, you're this happened to a top up. Yeah. It's like we're all in it. Yeah, I know. And so it's like, oh, hey, I know, like we've been sending sexy messages. I know you're kind of a bit fun and like that. So you might be into this. Yeah. Oh, my god. Suddenly, I'm casually rubbing digital shoulders with verified.

Oh, phew, I was rubbing what? Okay. Hello. I'm rubbing digital shoulders with verified sex symbols and we're all saying more than just shoulders. Like it was just like this sexy group. What? It's just like I'm on the beach.

Pop a tit out of a wet suit. And that's incredibly hard to do. Well, I assume when you're on the beaches of Santorini, you probably don't need a wetsuit. No, but they've found a way. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Wow. And now, obviously, a part of the group is like, she's not going to out anyone, but she's like, well, that's where I am. Absolutely. I know. I respect it. I feel like I'd love you to show it.

But I respect it. But I would love it. No, I respect it. Add me to the group chat you to show it, but I respect it. But I would- No, I respect it. Add me to the group chat. Yeah. I don't know who you are. I can't find out who you are because you submitted this confession, but just like add me.

So I thought that you were going to say they got added by accident. Like their name was, you know, Angelina White. And they meant to add Angela White, you know, or something and it was like lost in translation or whatever. But that is really hot. That's hot. Oh my giddy god.

Now, this tarpa's confession is not scandalous, but I think it's a confession because they're a little bit embarrassed to put their name to it. Hot. Hey, save space. Until recently, Tony and Ryan was the only podcast I've ever listened to. They're like, I wasn't a podcast person. So fair. But I saw you guys on TikTok, thought I'd check it out and I've been listening ever since. A friend recommended this other one I try out. So I was like, yep, cool. I like Tony and Ryan.

I'm a podcast person now. Yeah. I tried it out and I was really confused and appalled that the podcast I was listening to was not approved by someone who listens, as if it was some sort of required podcast industry legality. Like this one other podcast was the one podcast not following official podcast protocol. And you're like, well, how dare they? And because I only listened to Tony and Ryan, I just assumed every podcast did this.

That is so funny. So the TARPA's message, their friend, who's not a TARPA by the way. And being like, whoa, how embarrassing. They're breaking the law. Is kind of like, what the fuck is this cowboy shit? You know? Cowboy world.

Yeah, it's cowboy world. And the TARPA goes, if you thought I was confused, imagine how confused my non-TAR was to being like what do you say? She gets this message going so where's the approval dog? What is this shit another person goes? At least she just messaged the friend and didn't message them on Instagram and go hey pretty fucked You don't have an approval Hi, it's Amanda from Madison, Wisconsin, and you're listening to the Tony and Ryan podcast. This episode is sponsored by Audible.

And if you're into psychological thrillers, then listen up, this is for you. Oh, it is. Sacrilege Curse of the M'Biwi is the new Audible original and it's bone chilling. It stars Caleb McLaughlin, you know, Lucas from Stranger Things, and it follows the story of the Wallace family whose trip to a luxury game reserve in Zimbabwe quickly unravels. He unintentionally desecrates sacred ground and unleashes a supernatural force called the Mbiywi, a vengeful spirit born from centuries of colonial oppression. We're talking possessed animals, shapeshifting horrors,

a vengeful spirit rooted in generations of colonial trauma. Now Daschen, that's Caleb's character, he has to face this curse and his own past to save what remains of his family. It's written and directed by visionary creator Nyasha Hatendi and presented in spectacular Dolby Atmos. Think pulse-pounding suspense with powerful explorations of identity and privilege. Listen to Sacrilege, curse of the Mbuie now. Go to audible.ca slash sacrilege.

That's S-A-C-R-I-L-E-G-E. Imagine waking up to breathtaking landscapes, vibrant culture and a welcoming community. New Zealand is calling. If you are a passionate early childhood primary or secondary school teacher, New Zealand says come teach us. With up to $10,000 New Zealand dollars in relocation support, now's the time. Make your move. Find out more about moving to New Zealand to teach at workforce.education.govt.nz.

Open to existing qualified primary, secondary and ECE teachers. Note that this grant is only disbursed after teachers arrive in New Zealand and meets the other accompanying criteria. A massive shout out to a few of our champion tarpers are Reese Hodge. Thanks, Reese. Hodgey. Reese Hodge sounds a bit like Tony Lodge, don't you reckon? Thanks Charles. Mackenzie Tyler, Hardly Noah.

You know who she sounds like. Ryan Dunn. Your nephew. Yes! Yeah. Yeah. My nephew Mackenzie. Patrick Black, good on you Patrick.

Sounds like Jack Black a little bit. Sounds like Patrick Brummell. I love Patrick Brummell. Not as much as Jack Black apparently. Jennifer Brown. Oh wow! Like all the colors of the rainbow. Riri, good on you Riri. Shell and Bronwyn Gladman. Now they're just a few of our champion tarpas that'll hopefully be joining us for the Tarpa-thon this weekend. This weekend on Saturday. And a little secret post. I don't like this there's collusion occurring in the Patreon. Well as someone who's being bingoed this year I'm

walking on eggshells. Yeah but so apparently Charles has posted into the Patreon for Champion Tarpas so the people that can watch the Tarpathon this weekend and they're creating a little bingo So if you've got any ideas of what should go onto that bingo sheet, Charles has posted in there. You can add your thoughts, have a look at what everyone else is thinking. Can I add an idea for bingo? No.

That's fucking brutal. He's still, he's lashing out. Is the beanie. I can see it in his eyes. He's hatred. Honestly, I understand. Burning hot hatred. Yep.

Yeah. He's gonna fucking call his dad. Oh shit. His dad's lawyer. Hey dad, is he listening? Does your dad listen? He does sometimes. Oh.

The other day, he called Charles. I didn't steal your son's beanie. He called Charles when we were in LA and was like, is everything okay? Am I going to be a granddad after I had to take that pregnancy test? Yeah, that was a 50-50 chance from the master. Yeah, so fair. And he's like, oh, am I going to be a granddad? Like, you know, doing gear, which is pretty funny.

Did you hear about that, Soph? Yeah, Soph, he was here when we talked about it. The Charles and I sat down with just the two of us and said, whoever's the father, we'll do the right thing. We're gonna do the right thing. We'll take it on. Well, cause I messaged Sophie and I was like, if you were here with us, you would have watched me pee.

Gladly. And she said, absolutely I would have, which I just really appreciate it. I've been thinking a lot about the person. No, continue, yeah. I've been thinking a lot about the person that delivered the test. Oh yeah and she said I hope everything's okay. I mean a case of diet coke and a pregnancy test, I mean what a combination. I hope she's okay. She thought it was probably thought it was a frat house or something. Can we, we still have her details in the Uber app. I ordered it, so yeah, I do. But just message her and just let her know.

Because she might be still thinking about it. Yeah, she might be. You are so lovely. Just wanted to let you know I'm great and I really appreciate the delivery. Did you tip her? I did. She has that energy.

And she goes, oh, no worries. I tip pretty hard, actually, because I was like, let's keep this between us. Tony's an emotional tipper. I am. I actually am. So is Charles. Oh, and he's never emotional,ipper. I am! I actually am. So is Charles. And he's never emotional so. But. Tides out folks. No, remember though that. Didn't tip that taxi driver. Remember that light sweet honey he was flirting with at that cafe? Which one?

At the Great White Cafe, the Sharp Cafe. Which one? Oh that one! Yeah, that got him a shirt. Yeah. Yeah, there was a little bit of back and forth there in terms of dollars as well. I think Charles, Charles tipped that. He's great at tipping when work's paying, hey. That was the only time I tipped that whole trip, can I say? On the work card. No, no, no, and that was,

he paid for his shirt separately. That is true. So he made us look like assholes. Yeah, I think I asked for it as well. Um. That shirt costed so much as well. I was going to make the other day. Don't look at the currency conversions.

You can't convert it. And you don't have to worry. Surely your dad pays your statement and it all just comes out in the wash. I wouldn't worry. Yes, mate. Oh, speaking of pregnancy scares. I've just got a- It wasn't a- Yeah, I scares, I've just got a couple of things jotted down. I've got a little folder in my phone when Tony says weird shit.

I'll go, I'll write that one down. Oh I love that! It's my favourite game! And this one is about you having children or not having children. Yeah. Coincidence chat. Yeah. I'm just going to read what you said. I'm just reading what you said.

Is this about me not having to recycle? No. Oh. But we can dig into that. Let me, let's start with this one. Okay. Then we'll get back to that. Okay.

This is from Tony Lodge. When I was little, we had to cut down trees in the forest for firewood. The reason I don't want kids is I wouldn't want my kids to have to do that. Well, let me, I was, this is so triggering. I don't want everyone to take a deep breath. The other day.

I'm not saying it sucks. Nah. It doesn't suck. I'm just saying. So every fucking weekend we would have to go into the forest and cut fucking firewood down. And I remember being like seven or eight years old and vowing, I would never make my children do this. So that is a, that statement makes sense.

Yeah. And then so. I don't think that's. No. then so that's no. And so now another addition is like, well, I don't want kids love them. Sure. But don't want kids at this point. And what a bonus that I don't ever have to consider like, oh, they. That's not what you said at the time. Well, it seems like your brain had this built in assumption. That like, well, if I've got kids, they have to be slaves. They would have to do that thing.

Yeah. Like I was. Yeah. Well, a bit like the approver, I assumed that if you had kids, you had to make them work like fucking dogs. Yeah. And then, you know. Because someone's father didn't want to pay the fucking heating bill, even though he bought a new fucking heater. Put the heater in. And then it seized up and didn't fucking work, you know? Because someone's father didn't want to pay the fucking heating bill, even though he bought a new fucking heater.

Put the heater in. And then it seized up and didn't fucking work, you know? And that's my fault too. But, whoa. Let's all take a, still taking a step back. I assumed that that was just part of being a kid and definitely dropped a lot. Why did you have me if you can't look after me, can I?

You gave him one of those ones. As I got older, yeah. Like that, oh, never like. and definitely dropped a lot. Why did you have me if you can't look after me, can't it? You gave him one of those ones. As I got older, yeah. Oh, never like. I said that to my mum when I was two days old and she fucked me off. So be careful with those statements as well. Why did you have me if you can't look after me?

And she went, I can't. She goes, I actually didn't want you. Yeah. So we- Bye! You're in the back of the taxi. I agree to agree. See ya.

Hope you've got cash. Yeah. Hope you got money to pay the driver. Yeah, I did a run around that cabbie. Good. At two days old. Good. Oh, you little bum.

Yeah, we've been around. Yeah. Now can we get to the recycling? What was that about? Well, so is it like the worst thing you can do for the environment, Like have a kid? Like that, you know how they say like- I'm sure there's a bunch of worse stuff.

Oh, totally. You know, there's people cutting down the Amazon. Yeah, and fucking it up. Yeah. Yeah. So having a child would be in the top hundred. I think it's like not ideal, yeah. And because you're so into recycling. Well, I did once- You're so into the planet, I did once say to my sister, like,

well, I don't need to worry about, and I was being funny, but it's kind of true. I said, I don't need to worry about recycling because I don't have kids. But if I was to have a kid, obviously then I would like, you know, worry about my carbon footprint a bit more. My offset, yes, exactly. It sounds like, and I don't about my carbon footprint a bit more. My offset, yes, exactly. It sounds like, and I don't want to put words

in your mouth. And you would never put anything in my mouth. But it sounds like, that you've forgotten that when you pass away, the world doesn't just close up shop and go home. No, no, no, no, but all I can do is control what I do. Yeah, by recycling now. No, obviously I do recycle because I'm too scared of getting one of those stickers on my is control what I do. Yeah, by recycling now. No, obviously I do recycle

because I'm too scared of getting one of those stickers on my bin like what you got. Getting canceled for recycling purposes. But I promise I do recycle, I do separate my rubbish. Now that I, did you know, I only found this out like a couple of years ago. Those two different bins have two different meanings? No, no, no, no, I didn't know that you couldn't

recycle soft plastic. Like genuinely had no idea that that was like one of the things you couldn't recycle. What's the definition of soft plastic? Like plastic bags and like, you know, or if something's wrapped in plastic, you can't recycle that. Really?

No, and you can also, the other thing, polystyrene. That's rubbish. You know it's fucked up when you go to the supermarket and there's like- Oh, and you've got a kid. Disgusting. You drive a petrol car as well. You hate the world. When you go to the supermarket and there's like

a single carrot on a polystyrene tray covered in Glad Wrap. Yeah. And you're like, it's a fucking carrot though. Mine is when you see a banana wrapped in plastic. You go, it has natural plastic. Yeah. Like it's wrapped already. Yeah, pre-wrapped. Like God's got it. Do you know what I mean, like, it's a fucking carrot though. Mine is when you see a banana wrapped in plastic. You go, it has natural plastic. Yeah. Like it's wrapped already. Yeah, pre-wrapped.

Like, God's got it. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Like, it's all good. But yeah, when I realized you couldn't do soft plastic, I was like, and it was actually when I lived in the apartment, they had like massive signs of like, what can go where. And I genuinely did not know that.

I'm glad when I was moving house and said, hey, Tony, can you let me into your apartment basement so I can dump a bunch of shit? Yeah. I didn't notice those signs. Yeah. I don't know how you couldn't because they were- Where do I put an old computer?

You have to recycle it at an electrician's place. Yep. Electricist, sorry. And that's where I went. Officeworks, yeah. The one on Burley Street at the end of the- Bridge Road. Yeah.

Fuck. Next thing Tony said is... I'll take it. I don't mind. Good morning, Ryan. I had another dream where we kissed. Well, I always tell you when I have a dream that we kissed, because you remember the first time I told you

and you were like, how was it? And I was like, really bad. Yeah. And it was. I had actually a dream the other night though. But that's your brain making me a bad kisser. Yeah but I've looked into it and it doesn't mean anything. I thought you said I've looked into it and Bridget agrees. God I've surveyed every person you've kissed and a thousand out of a thousand said. Sorry two thousand out of two thousand said, sorry, 2000 out of 2000. We don't slut shame here. That wasn't a slut shame at all.

Was it a boast on behalf of your friend? A boast? A boast. What it? A boast, oh God. No, I've looked into it and it doesn't mean anything. Like dream chat, you know what I mean? Like, you know how if you have a dream that you like

have sex with someone that's close to you and that's like really weird. Or if you have a dream that you've like sleep with a family member or something, you're like, oh my God, am I so deprived? Like doesn't actually mean literally that. Let me ask Siri. Hey Siri, if my friend had a dream where we kissed,

does that mean, what does that mean? Hello? Hello Siri? Hey Siri? God, this is good entertainment. If Tony has dreams that we kissed, does that mean that she likes me? Hello?

Hello? I'm about to fucking throw up. Do you want me to ask my chat GPT? You know what I was thinking the other day? Why isn't Siri chat GPT? It like had a 20 year head start on technology and it's just still so. I actually don't. Well tech chat, first of all

it's now linked with chat gbt so it uses chat. Second, they're coming out with the new Siri next year. Well actually... Hey Siri, can you please ask chat gbt if my friend Tony wants to, has dreams that she is kissing me, does that mean anything over send? To use chat GBT you'll need to enable it. Yes, you have to like I think that what's like boy. Imagine if we did this any other time Do you know what I mean like a single other time like any other time Do you know what I mean? Like a single other time. Like any other time.

Oh, God. Dreams about, no, read it out. It's a podcast, Siri. She's shy. Oh, if Tony dreams about kissing you, it might reflect emotions and it might not. Thanks for a fucking cool story, bro. Wow, that was worth it.

It wasn't. Yeah. Tony got a refund for something the other day and. Well, that was worth it. It wasn't. Yeah. Tony got a refund for something the other day and she went, oh, free money. That is worldwide known that that's true. Yes. Just free money. It is. But what about-

It's like a savings account. So what are you saving up for? Anything I want. I don't have kids. All right, what do you saving up for? Anything I want. I don't have kids. What do you love to see? I've got a love to see here from Hannah, who is a local here in Melbourne, Nariwaran South. Nasa-was-up! Do people call it Nasa-was-up?

I don't think so. Nariwaran is just like the most stressful suburb to say. Nari Warren, don't you think? And it doesn't it sound so Melbourne? If Nari Warren was a bloke, what would his name be? Was-a, yeah. Nah. Is that what you're saying?

No, it's like the energy. Oh, Murray. Like it would be. But Hannah from Narrow. She is 25. 25? That's actually 29 is that joke. But anyway, she's 25

and she's created a very own business. She said, I still can't believe it. I want to share this with you. My company is called Alike Skincare. And for sore skin girlies, TM, I get it. She created it because she had really bad eczema and she was always trying to find other brands that would work for her and couldn't find anything.

Created this own, yeah, it's called Alike Skincare. It's made here in Melbourne. How cool is that? So she's launched a website, I like skincare.com.au. Um, and just, I was like, I'm so happy to share that because it is really hard to find skincare stuff. And especially like there's something about it being made locally. That feels so lovely as well. Doesn't it? Does she have a store in Nari Warren that we can visit? I don't, it's just like an excuse to get down there, you know? I don't believe so.

Let us know. But the website is available. Should we? Based out of Nariwaran. What could we do in Nariwaran? Because I just drive through on the way to Phillip Island. Best things to do in Nariwaran. Don't ask Siri, don't ask Siri.

I'm not asking Siri. Westfield Fountain Gate is literally the first thing that came up. So that's good. I was gonna say, isn't it the, isn't it Kath, is Kath and Kim? That's not Nariwaran, but yeah. Similar vibes.

Yeah. The first thing of where to eat is Betty's Burgers. Yeah. They've got a Betty's Burgers. That's all right. They're doing well. It'll be at the Westfield, yeah. It also says Puffingbilly Railway,

but that goes from Belgrave to Jembroke, so I don't think that's in Nariwaran. No, they're fucked that up. So that fucked that right up. Oh, there's a Village Cinemas. Is it at the Westfield? There is quite literally under top sites in Nariwaran, there is, it's just Amber Crescent, like a road.

Well I have to visit. Yeah let's get down there, that's where the Westfield is. Is there anything on that list not in the Westfield? I don't think so, no except for Ray Bastien Reserve. Might be next to the Westfield though. I wonder if you have to pay for parking. Do you know what I think that they're fucking doing? You know the Westfield in Preston

opposite the Preston market. They've been- Is there a Westfield there? No, Woolworths. Yeah. Hey, yeah. Sorry, sorry, my bad. The Woolworths there opposite the Preston market.

They've been redoing the fucking car park. And you know what I reckon they're fucking doing? You're gonna put a pay thing in? Yes! Fuck, well, I'm going back to Coles. the fucking car park and you know what I reckon they're fucking doing? Yes they have. Gonna put a pay thing in? YES! Fuck, well I'm going back to Coles. Get fully fucked. Get fully fucked.

Fully fucked. Get a full dog up here. Oh, literally get fully fucked. At a supermarket. They better, they better give me two hours free. Even then though It's still the admin of getting the ticket free ticket and like What a fucking cock up from them

Shocking Okay, so the rate this is my good It's my local Like if it like reads on the number Because that's what my local is. Yeah but Preston is a long way from where you live Charles. And that's me saying what I'm saying nicely. And people can read between the lines. But what I'm saying is the one at Preston's not getting that.

Well the thing is, so they've put like I saw all this cabling that they'd put under the so it's gotta be. Oh nah under there. So it's gotta be. It's gotta be. But what I think it is is because at the Preston market, when that's really busy, everyone parks in the Woolworths. So what I think, I don't think they will do the two hours free because it's obviously to deter people from parking.

Yeah. Instead of- You get two hours free with the receipts. Yeah. And then so you're going to have to. So you will have to scan it. I reckon this is hypothetically. This is just my here's what I'll say about that.

What the other thing. Sorry. One more thing is that the train stations right there as well. Yeah. So I reckon they've just got people fucking parking there all the live long day. And it fucks us for the people, you know, that do the right fucking thing. It does. As a resident, a homeowner in the area, it actually- A rates payer. A rates payer.

Taxpayer, rates payer, I mean, I own the Woolworths, isn't it? Yep. And I can't believe that they want me to pay to park there to spend my fucking hard earned dollary dues. Hypothetically. Hypoth... Yes, this is all just up in the air at the moment.

Nothing's been locked in, but it is what I predict is what they are fucking doing there. And the other thing is that while they've been doing it up, there's all the parking's been closed. So you can't fucking park there, even if I wanted to pay, you can't, because all the, what you call me? You can't fucking park there, even if I wanted to pay, you can't, cause all the, what you call me? You can't, what you call me,

because all of the fucking things have been blocked off so that they can put the fucking little pay wires underneath. Now, I couldn't agree more with the sentiment of everything that's just been said. Thank you so much. But there's one key detail. Yeah, key tell.

That people will find fascinating about this. Oh no. You know what it is, don't you? I don't, but I know it's- Tony Lodge. Yeah. When you do your weekly shop, do you drive and park or do you get it delivered? My big shop, I do get delivered.

Yeah. My big shop I do get delivered. But what about when I pop in through the week? How often does that happen? Once or twice a week normally. Okay, okay. Because like I'll buy all the stuff for the week but not like the chicken. Yeah. Because that'll fucking go off.

Yeah, yeah. It's always gone. So we get Woolies online. Yeah. But if I find out I have to pay to park at your supermarket, which I never go to anyway, I'll switch to Cole's online. So you do-

In protest. So you do Woolies online and get it delivered. Yeah, because it's just like- Yeah, why the fuck would you park there? Well, I find the shops really overwhelming. I really don't like it. And I hate that now you can't even, when you've got a full trolley of groceries,

you can't go through a person. Like they don't have people there. You have to do the self checkout. So you've got all your stuff and you've got your fucking- I tell you what you need? What? A two year old, because they love that shit. Okay, so that goes against everything

that we've already talked about. Yeah, they don't have to do the campfire thing. Yeah. But Mabel's standing in the trolley and then me passing her stuff is the best fun she can have. Well, yeah, maybe I'll just take Mabel to do my show. No, actually, no, I already do it online. Yeah, that's fine.

But I'm talking about a little pop-in. There's also a chemist there. It's like the same car park for the chemist. Is the chemist gonna give me a receipt for the two hour free parking? Like, what shmoz. What about the Vodafone across the road? What are they gonna do? Who knows? The other day I was at your less favorite Westfield Doncaster. Yep. And every time I go there since we like gave our thoughts on the parking situation over there, I feel like...

You're a target there. Yeah. Is there a target there? Ironically, no. And we literally had this conversation because Fridja was like, is there a target? I was like, no, there's a big doggy on the camera. But it's like I'm walking around on enemy territory.

Yeah, cause you're like, oh fuck, what if someone sees? Oh, well you're bugging me, you still turn up, do you mate? Yeah, or like the store management people. Excuse me. You go to the information desk and they just throw a pie in your face. Do you have any luck to see it? Lorna. Hi Lorna.

Oh shit. I run an activity group for the elderly. Oh, beautiful. And they requested some Elvis to be like a bit of music on. Sure. So I pop on my Spotify but I didn't realize it's I don't know how this worked but it's like fucking queued up or something and then she's mid-ep of this podcast and it's like a spicy one and the old ducks are just sitting around doing craft and the thing. That sounds fun. And what? The craft sounds really fun. Now I can't remember this specific episode but it said, Lorna says,

it cut off just before Tony shouted I said fucking rise. Oh it was with the... The gavel. The gavel yeah. Yeah okay. So you were all been right up to it and I don't know if the oldies would have appreciated that without notice. So she just goes, my love to see it is, you know, when you just like, you catch something before it falls, you have that moment of like,

save the day. Yeah. Yeah. And so Lorna was like, that gave me such a rush. Thank you very much. You love to see it. Oh, you love to see that. Thanks, Lorna. Thanks for sharing that. Tomorrow on the show as we it's three more sleeps. Tuesday night, Wednesday night, Thursday night Thursday night Friday four more sleeps till Tarpaathon we've still got a bit of things to debrief yep we need a bit of help and if you want to join us this Saturday June 28th for Tarpaathon 3 yep but we'll chat to you tomorrow love you bye