Toni and Ryan - 💦 on the highway

Episode Date: June 1, 2022

Unbelievable jizz stories, and we chat about the AMAZING MOVIE 10 Things I Hate About You! Love ya Toni xxx Check out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello? Hi, Charlotte. Hi. Hi, it's Tony and Ryan. Hello. Have we woken you? Yeah. You're doing like this really sexy, like airy voice.

I don't really. I think that's because I've got a cold. Oh, talk to me. Well, can you approve this podcast on your sexy voice? No, you didn't expect to get told dirty to do. Oh, what are you wearing? I'm. This podcast has been going for 30. I'm definitely not going to answer that.

This podcast has been going for 35 seconds and I'm under the collar. Yeah, that was right. You just hit the top of the desk. Wow. From the bar. I feel my job is done, so I definitely will approve the podcast. Thank you. Oh, and you do whatever you want.

Cold water to the sheep in the back. Hi, it's Lottie from Yorkshire, and I approve this podcast. Welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast. Welcome to Tony and Ryan Friday. I know, but it's Tony and Ryan Friday for the next few weeks because we are only doing four episodes at the moment. It's your Friday. So this is our Tony and Ryan Friday.

Okay. Even though we've both got two full days of work to go. Oh, yeah. So we still also work full time. But I just wanted to make everyone feel really bad that it's only Thursday. Way to rub it in. I saw this meme the other day. Fuck off.

I know. Who would have guessed it? Me working hard at work. Wow. Busy guy. So busy. It said, in quotation marks, thank God it's Friday. And then you know who said it?

Some bloke who's just about to learn his Wednesday is getting a lot worse. One thing I do love about the TARPers, the Tony and Ryan podcast community, is that it doesn't really matter how, unless you fucking shit on a towel, how embarrassing a thing you do. I feel like we're all in this together. We're all a bit weird. And whatever we do that's weird, there's always a type of, that's, hey, bro, I've been there too.

I've also experienced this. I'm willing to share their stories. They are really good at coming to the party. And I'd like to thank a few people for coming to my party. Oh, when did you have a party? I wasn't invited. It was the to the party. And I'd like to thank a few people for coming to my party. Oh, when did you have a party? I wasn't invited. It was the jizz party. Interesting choice of words.

Don't know how we got here, but here we are. That's okay. So a few weeks ago I said I had to give a sperm sample. Yes, because you and your wife are trying for a baby. Yep. Just wanted to get the swimmers checked. Swimming well. Yep.

And what precisely happened? Well, now because of COVID, you don't give the sample at the place. You need to do it at home and then drop it off. But you've only got about 30 or 40 minutes because it needs to be like, I don't want to say the word fresh because it's getting a bit graphic and gross, but it needs to be a recent sample. And correct me if I'm wrong, but is that just not the worst situation to have time pressure for?

I caught an Uber with jizz in my pocket. Yeah. And, yeah, knowing that it opens at 8, so I need to finish at 7.41. Finish or. Wait, what do you want me to fucking say? Oh, just do it. Just do it at 7.41. Do it at 7.41.

Because you can't do it too early. Yeah. But you can't do it too late because then you're running out of time. Yeah, and then the Uber's going to be at the door. Because you had to be at work as well. Excuse me, sir, Uber. I settled for Uber in a second. Yeah, I'm coming.

Is that the Uber or the fake taxi? Coming. What's a fake taxi? Don't. Actually Google it. And then you'll know why it makes sense in this story. Fake taxi. Some results may be explicit.

Oh, it's like a series of like a type of porn video. The taxi driver is not really a taxi driver. And the passengers in the taxi don't end up paying with money. Yeah. Paying with cummy. Oh, my God. Why are you still looking at it? Look away.

I started, like, scrolling, but I don't know why. God, I'm going to have to explain that to my boyfriend when I go home. Rest in peace, your algorithm. Anyway, because of this 30-minute rule kind of thing, shout out to the people that don't live in town. Well, that's what I said. If you live far away, what are you supposed to get a hotel for the night? Wow.

I've got a few stories of people that don't live close to town and they, and like I said, we're all in this together. Yeah. Schmiegan and Wazza have shared their stories. Oh, Schmiegan, thank you so much because it's a natural part of life. Yeah. Like we laugh and we joke and it's like, oh, Ryan came in his pocket. But like it was for a real reason.

I came into a jar that then got placed in my pocket. There's a very important step between. I didn't just come in my pocket. Schmiegan. Hi, Schmiegan. We live too far from the collection place too. They didn't have a room to get it done. The clinic suggested using a public bathroom

and we both thought that sounds disgusting. And they're right. That's gross, right? How's the clinic suggesting that? How's that? What the fuck? Yeah, thank you. Oh, there's a McDonald's next door.

Why don't you just get a double quarter pounder and just do it in the toilet? Gross. That's really inappropriate, don't you think? Yeah, well, we don't know what to do because they're like COVID, we don't have the rooms anymore, we don't know what to tell because they're like COVID. We don't have the rooms anymore. We don't know what to tell you. Maybe try this. Schmiegan said that's gross.

Oh. So we came up with the idea that we borrowed, well, they borrowed Schmiegan's mum's Ford Explorer, the car, because it had, you know those cars that have the. Explorer? Hardly know her. Fuck that. They've got the seats in the back back.

You know how sometimes it's like the three rows of seats? Yeah, but do you want to come in your mum's car? That's the question I have to ask. I mean, maybe when you're borrowing your mum's car, when you're on your P's, you don't have your own car yet. Of course you're going to sneak a chicky baby in the back. But when you're an adult, do you really want to be coming in your mum's Explorer?

but when you're an adult, do you really want to be coming in your mum's Explorer? So Schmiegan is driving whilst the husband's in the backpack. Coming on the go. On the highway because they're travelling from their rural town into town to drop it off. And so they're like, how far away are we? What's it say on the GPS? About 28 minutes?

All right. Cool, I'll hop in the back. And because it was the backpack, he just thought, you know, that bit of separation might make it a little bit less awkward, which I'm not sure. I mean, it would be awkward either way, I would have thought. Yeah. And that's like, that's your partner.

So it's not that weird, but it is a bit different. Well, I guess when you're doing it yourself, it's still, yeah. Yeah. I mean, we know what we're doing, but it's still awkward and funny. Yeah. So he's in the back-back and Schmiegan's job is, because it's a multi-lane highway, is he's like, just don't be going the same speed as another car whilst being next to them. Yeah. So he's in the back back and Schmiegan's job is, because it's a multi-lane highway, is he's like, just don't be going the same speed as another car

whilst being next to them. Absolutely. So they're just staring straight in and see him wailing in the back. Wailing? Fucking hell. Yep. Schmiegan's. Imagine, sorry.

Go on. Can we just think about how funny that would be? Yeah. I mean, that's all I've thought about since Schmiegan told this story. Because you just imagine driving down the highway, you do that double take thing. What the fuck? But then Megan's realised she sped up a bit so then they're gone

and you're like, did I just imagine that? Was there a guy in the back of that jacking off? Explorer. Exploring himself. Sorry. The sound was a bit off-putting. You'd put the radio. Oh, then you'd be on there.

Hey, it's Melbourne. Excuse me. Oh, no, they're listening to Nasu's 97.3 reggae station. Anybody off to give a sample to them? Hey, man, give us your say, man. Anyone travelling down the highway? They'll be travelling into that jar. You did an accent.

Ryan. I'm only usually an Melbourne DJ. Yeah. Now I'm international. Now you're in Sanua. Sanua? Isn't that what you said? Nasua.

Oh, Sanua as in? Malaysia or Bali? Bali, yeah. Malaysia or something? Balasia. Balasia. Balasia. Bali.

TikTok. Anyway. She said the sound was off-putting, so they put on some sexy music. Like their neighbours that I overheard on Valentine's Day. So. When we got there. So he's in the back of the Day. So. When we got there. So he's in the back of the Explorer. Yeah.

They're playing a sexy music. He's getting ready to give his sample. He's on the way to. And gives it. Yeah. She is, she's driving. Keep your eyes on the road, sweetheart. Keep your eyes, yeah, don't look in that rear view mirror.

Oh, I don't want to see that view of the rear. Things may seem smaller in the mirror. So they get to the hospital. Yeah. And he sort of walks in, you know, a bit sheepish, as I experienced. It's an awkward situation. Totally, yeah.

You come in your pocket. Yeah. Yeah. Do they give you at least like a tinted jar or is it clear? It's a clear jar. But sometimes the jar goes in a bag and the bag, yeah, it kind of creates a bit of a buffer. So he gets in there and goes, yeah, where do I drop off the thing?

I was told I had to drop it off. And they go, yeah, what name was the appointment under? Yeah. Appointment? I thought I just dropped it off. And they go, yeah, but before you drop it off, you need to book in. What? That's what he said.

So it turns out before you drop off your specimen, you have to make a booking. Oh, so that they know to expect it. Yeah. Don't say no, you're coming. Yeah. So he's like, oh, shit, look, we've just driven from the Grampians. And I've just come in the back of my mother-in-law's Explorer.

I've just come in my mum's. That's his mum's, I think. His mum's. Oh, his mum's? Thank God. Yeah, I've come in my mum-in-law's Explorer on the Western Highway. Can you just take it? Surely, it's fine, yeah.

No, they had to make a booking and come back and do it again the following week. They had to make a booking and come back and do it again the following week. Fuck off. Shout out to Schmiegan's husband. Schmiegan, oh, that is fucking traumatic. At least you only had to do it once. Well, you had to do it twice. No, at least you only had to do it once. Like he's had to do it again.

I can confirm that Schmiegan and her partner are now mum and dad's two beautiful babies. Oh, wow. You don't often hear a happy end to coming in an Explorer. Well. I mean, well, it's up to you. A happy ending from a self-happy ending. So that is beautiful.

Oh, fuck. I can't believe that. You had to make a booking. Surely you would vet what you needed to do before going in. This is why you need a Tony Lodge in your life, to get the plan down. Pat, don't leave at the chance. No, you can't leave.

Oh, anyway, yep. Quickly, Wazza Brown. Wazza, tell us. Also lives out of town. Wazza Brown lives out of town. Didn't know that he could smile and frown. Couldn't do it at home, and I also felt weird doing it in the car. And the men's room felt weird because if there's a bloke in the stall next to you, they're

like 15 centimetres away and they can hear it. Oh, it's also like indecent exposure. Like you can't do that. Yeah. It's fucked up. It's illegal. So this lady at the hospital goes, oh, like if you want a room to yourself, just use the disabled toilet.

And he's like, oh, I guess there's no one else in there. You're not sharing a room. You can lock it. You know, it is what it is. Yeah. So he goes. How were they suggested? That is so fucked.

So he goes into the disabled toilet, gets it done, finishes up in the jar. And then because he's got the jar in his hand because he just needs to walk out and place it on the bench. Yes, Tony Lloyd. Sorry, I've got a question. How aiming-wise is quite. Use your English, dear.

Is it accurate? Is it easy to accurately or is there a bit of splatter? Sorry? Spray? Like, you know, because or is it easy to aim it or is it kind of like, oh, that's gone everywhere? Because if you're doing that in a public, like that's fucked. Yeah, it's fucked.

My answer is. Is it accurate? Is it easy to aim? Because if you're doing that in a public, like that's fucked. Yeah, it's fucked. My answer is. Is it accurate? Is it easy to aim? You kind of get close enough to the, like as in you're practically in the jar. You know what I mean? So it's not like you're from the other side of the room trying to lob it in. Totally, totally, totally, totally. Sorry.

He gets the job done. It's in the jar. And he's got the jar in his hand because he just needs to walk out of the disabled bathroom, put it on the bench. Plunk it on the thing bench and walk out and keep his head down. Yep, and move on with his life, yeah. So Wazza opens up the disabled door on his

way out and there's a kid in a wheelchair waiting to go into the disabled toilet. Yep. His carer and his mum, because they, he needed to go, there's only one disabled bathroom. Yeah. They open it. And because you're not supposed to use them so that they're available for people that need them.

So Waz is there, an abled-bodied man holding a jar of his own jizz, and they just looked at him and went, you all right? That was the mum that said that. You'd be pretty uncomfortable if you saw that. Like, I'm not saying it's not Waz's fault, like, because that was the only option they gave him. It's not his fault.

But like you, if you saw that, you'd be like, what the fuck? And he said like the kid in the wheelchair was like at jar level. So it was like right there in front of him. The mum said that and the nurse was just like, I think it seems like, from what Waz has told me, the nurse kind of knew this is fucked up but also I know you probably didn't have another option. But also the staff, that was the option the staff gave him. So what was his, like, you'd feel awful. Oh, my God.

It turns out that you actually had the least bad, as far as this goes. Sounds like it doesn't go great for everybody that does it. I don't want to say I got off easy. Holy shit. Coming up. Don't say coming up. Don't say coming up. Don't say coming up.

Still to come. No, not even worse. Here's the ad. Hi, it's Lottie from Yorkshire and you're listening to Tony and Ryan. A big thank you to a few of our champion tapas over at our Patreon. They've all got a Frank Green water bottle coming their way in the near future. Yep.

Simon Haas, Shelby Webster, Ariana B, Samantha Eyed, Tatiana Torrey, Sophia Tran and Nicola Smart. Thank you so much for being part of our Patreon. It's an absolute pleasure to have you. Enjoy your Frank Green water bottles. Very exciting stuff. The shipment is getting bigger. There are now 2,000 bottles being sent to all parts of the world.

That is fucking wild. What? When we went out for dinner with a few of the tapas to the Karen restaurant last week, we showed them the design. We did. They got a sneak peek. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We showed them the design. We did. They got a sneak peek. Yeah.

They liked it. I was going to say the response was warm, if not hot. Yeah. I was nervous. Like, you know when you show someone your work and you're like, oh, like, are you guys happy with the decision we've made? Yeah. Because we didn't want it to be over the top. No, because you have to carry it around.

Yeah, and because, like, we want you to use it as well. We don't want it to be something that you go, oh, that's really cool, but I can't use that in public. Because how embarrassing. Someone messaged me the other day and said, hey, Tony, like love the podcast, so happy to be a champion type. I can't wait to get my bottle. I do have a question, though.

I work with kids, like she's a teacher or like a teacher's aide or something, and she was like, is it going to have naughty words on it because I can't use that at work then? And I was like, how little do you think of us? I mean, I. It's a fair question. No, I don't judge her for asking. Yeah, but I saw it and I was like, oh, that's a bit rude.

And then I was like, it is fair enough actually. It's actually going to be a drink bottle that when you put the drink bottle to your mouth, it makes, there's a speaker in it and it makes the enough, actually. It's actually going to be a drink bottle, but when you put the drink bottle to your mouth, it makes, there's a speaker in it and it makes the sound of Tony. Ah? Yeah. Yeah. Every time you sip.

Yeah. And when you tip the water up, it like looks like a penis. Here's an example. Oh, I'm a bit parched. Might have to take a sip. Ah? That's what happens every time. Yeah.

It's like one of those cow things that you turn over and it moves. Hope you're not thirsty on a train. Everyone's going to look at you and go, jeez, she's loving that water. Yeah. Or if you get called into jury duty and you've got your water bottle, ah! Do you find the defendant guilty? Ah!

Yes. And then he murdered the people. Ah! Anyway. It's family friendly is the answer to that question. Yeah. Another one of the perks of being part of our Patreon is that you get to vote on the movies we watch every single week.

Yes. This week, oh, I mean, it was a bit of a phone-it-in category, to be honest. Actually, no. Oh. Some people have accused us of putting in a phone-it-in category and there was a lot of chat in the comments about people going, oh, you guys have given up on the categories of the movie.

Oh, no, we haven't given up. I don't think it was our best category. Oh, so you're with them? No, I'm never with them. I'm with you. Thank you. What's the name of the category? And people listening will decide if this is a shit movie category.

Movies with the number 10 in it. So... I mean, when you say it with an attitude like that, maybe it doesn't sound that way. All right. Okay. Let me go again. Movies with the number 10 in it.

Yeah. Yeah. Woo. So a couple of weeks ago, two weeks ago, we watched How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days. Yep. And then we said, oh, maybe we should do the category of things that have 10 in it.

I thought Ryan was joking. I was like, we're not doing that. And then he didn't respond to my text like two hours. I'm not joking. I'm not funny. I can't joke. Yeah, that's true. I just state facts.

So the options were what? The 310 to Yuma? Yep, 310 to Yuma, 10 Cloverfield Lane, 10 Items or Less, How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days Again, 10 Things I Hate About You, and then 10 HSD, The Pick of Destiny, and Anchorman, the Extended Director's Cut. We were on the phone. How dare you accuse us of phoning it in?

We were on the phone together and we were like, fuck, this is going to be so funny. Not a warm reception. No, no. I thought that people would think that was really funny. I would describe the reception as frosty. Yeah, and people just didn't really like. Do you blame them though?

Love the joke. And we were on the phone fucking pissing ourselves laughing. I thought it was so hilarious. The funniest thing since the Hell and Back Girl. And, I mean, what a laugh that got. Yeah. So everybody ended up voting on the movie 10 Things I Hate About You. It's from what, like the mid-90s?

Yeah. When did it come out? And I'll just say in terms of like, you know, high school rom-com teen drama, that category. 99. Sorry. Is this the best of that whole category?

It's a pretty great film. It's iconic. Yeah. How many other movies just have the band on the roof for a drone shot? I remember thinking that was so fucked. But it wouldn't have been a drone then. It would have been a crane. Of course.

Because they didn't have drones then. Pre-drone era. Yeah. So it would have been on a fucking then. It would have been a crane. Of course. Because they didn't have drones then. Pre-drone era. Yeah, so it would have been on a fucking crane and they would have panned across and the water in the background and stuff. I remember thinking, how cool is that? Yeah. When I was like a kid and watched this for the first time. Yeah, and you're like Alex Mack is doing other movies, good for her.

Julia Stiles, before she was like full Julia Stiles. It is such. The dad is hilarious. It's such a great fucking movie. Yeah. Some really iconic lines like, you know, can you, I know you can be underwhelmed and you can be overwhelmed, but can you ever just be whelmed?

I think you can in Europe. Like it just, it makes me laugh so much. And then I do have to make a point that I went to WAPA, like the university I went to is WAPA. What does WAPA stand for? Western Australian Academy of Performing Arts. So it's like a very. Academy of Performing Arts.

Yeah. So it's an arts university. It is one of the most prestigious in the country. I did not go for acting or musical theatre or anything. You went for sound. I went for sound engineering in the theatre. But you actually can't, so they've got like all of these crazy stipulations.

You actually can't mention that you went to WAPA without mentioning like, oh, you know, where Hugh Jackman went? Or, oh, you know where Heath Ledger went? It's in the rules. I went to WAPA, Heath Ledger went there. It's a big thing. There is now the Heath Ledger Theatre. In Perth, yes.

It's a beautiful fucking theatre as well. It's a big thing. There is now the Heath Ledger Theatre. In Perth, yes. It's a beautiful fucking theatre as well. It's, like, lovely. Do you get, like, sad when you see Heath Ledger movies? Yeah, definitely. It's, like, so sad that he passed away. But he's just, like, so good and you just, like, it's one thing for him to be, like, a lovely guy, but then you go, fuck, just a mad, like,

he could have, would have been one of the great actors ever and would have gone on to have done who knows what i mean when you think about the fact that he probably already is one of the great actors and he only you know he didn't get to live his full life but also because he was um i don't think they were married but he has a daughter with michelle williams with michelle williams so she was in dawson's Creek. And like she always speaks, I don't think they were married. Like I don't think they were still together when he passed away, but she always speaks really highly of him. And I just, growing up, like as a kid,

having famous parents would be really hard. But like having them pass away and other people know about your parent. Telling you how great they were. You'd be like, oh, cool. Yeah, I never really met him. Yeah, I think it would be such a double-edged sword because you'd be like, I'm jealous that the world got to enjoy my dad and I didn't.

Yeah, that is such a weird. But also how great that the world got to enjoy your dad. Yeah. And there'd be so many photos. There'd be so many videos. Well, you can watch his movies. That's the best thing about cinema, I guess, is you can watch it. It lasts forever.

So she's going to be able to grow up and watch all that stuff and be like, that was my dad. Did dad always wear those leather pants or was that just in 10 Things I Had About You? Yeah, just that one. He is so handsome. He really is. And in that movie because I love.

You like a bad boy, don't you? Yeah, I do. You love a bad boy. And he is a bad. He really is. And in that movie because I love. You like a bad boy, don't you? Yeah, I do. You love a bad boy. And he is a bad, he ate a duck. Yeah, everything except the beacon feet. When, you know, when they play paintball. Yeah. And then he puts the like paint on her head and then they kiss in the hay.

Oh. Oh. That does that for you, doesn't it? And then after that when they've like showered or whatever and they get back to her house and he's wearing those like tight black trousers and that like black singlet and she's like, oh, is the accent real? And he's like, yeah, I lived in Australia until I was 10 with my mum.

Yeah. And you're just like, oh, like the accent, the look, just everything. And I love it when Australians are Australian in films. Yeah. Like because there's all these American accents and then they're like, yeah, I'm from Australia and I just love it. Yeah.

And you love a bad boy, don't you? Yeah. Geez, if everyone could see the faces that you're pulling right now from Heath Ledger. And he just, I mean, not only is he a dream, it's that smile. He's got that fucking huge smile. He seems like he would have just been like such a nice guy. It's so sad that he passed away.

Would you like a man to sing for you from the stadium like he did? Because obviously he's not a singer, but that scene is just so good, isn't it? Iconic, yeah. I think when I was in high school I would have been like, oh, why wouldn't a boy do that for me? But now. Sony Lodge, here she is. Beautiful.

Do you want me to sing you a proper song one day? Yep, now. Go. No, I'll do it properly. I'll find a stadium. Oh, yeah, okay. Yeah. We could recreate 10 Things I Hate About You.

Oh, that's a great idea. Top Things I Hate About You. Oh, fuck's a great idea. Top Things I Hate About You. Oh, fuck, that is good. We'll do it. Okay, put it on the list. Put it on the list. But now I think as an adult I'd be like, oh, our love is private. And Torbs would never do it.

Yeah, Torbs is not going to sing a song about me. No fucking way. He's so quiet. He's very private. But, yeah, like they just really like each other. I just think it's so special. It is special. And he's such a dreamboat.

I'm not trying to sexualise this person, but he is handsome as. I'm not trying to, I mean, tell your face. Yeah, sorry. But also, she is, like, such a great female character. Julia Starr. Yeah. Yeah. Like, oh, my God. Her character is so great. And she just, like, says great female character. Julia's style. Yeah. Yeah. Like, oh, my God.

Her character is so great and she just like says what she thinks. I've never done that in my life. Really? No, like I don't never stand up for myself like that. You just say what you think. Exhibit A, you gushing over Heath Ledger for the last five minutes. Okay. Maybe I'll cut it out.

Okay. So this is the first song that, like, this song plays in the very beginning of the movie, like as they're panning over Padua, like whatever. And it reminded me of one day a few years ago. Oh, my God. What's happening? Okay, no, so one day a couple of years,

this is, like, probably not going to sound that funny, but it's so fucking hilarious to me. On Christmas morning, Torbs and I, we had to drive like an hour to get to family. You know how the classic Christmas thing where you're like, cool, we've opened presents with this person. Now we've got to go to our auntie's place for lunch. We're traipsing around.

And we were going to be in the car for like an hour. And for some reason the night before, like Christmas Eve, I'd put that song, you know when you like search in Spotify for a song and it's just like that song, it doesn't like add to a playlist or anything, it just like plays that song. As a gag, I had like played that song for something and then the next morning we're like in the kerfuffle of getting into the car for Christmas.

I'm driving and Torbs is like our car is like full of presents. Torbs is holding a pie and a potato bake. So his hands are full. He's parked in the car. We're going to be in the car for an hour. And we get in the car. And I, like, turn the ignition on and start driving and the Bluetooth connects.

It's been one week since you looked at me. Right? And so this song plays and it's fucking Christmas morning so we're in a good mood, like whatever. And then we're like, fuck, we've really got to get going because we've got to be at fucking Arnie Ding Dong's house, whatever. Yeah. Then we realise that not only has that song been slated,

but it's on repeat. For an hour! Because I couldn't change it. Rip the stereo out of the car and throw it out the window. So I couldn't change it. And Torbs is, like, holding onto this pie for dear life. As he's screaming, he's like, throw the pie away. And this song played for an hour.

Yeah. And so now every single Christmas, if we're in the car for Christmas, we listen to that song. It's like our Christmas song. Oh, that's a tradition. That's cute. But, fuck, it was so funny. And, like, any time I've ever told someone that story, they go,

why didn't you put it on the radio? Because Ryan's on it? I'd rather listen to this for an hour. There's some better music. A whole fucking hour we listened to that song on repeat. That is brutal. It's, yeah, that. Fuck, that's good, though.

I love that you've got a cute little Christmas tradition. Yeah, so now on Christmas, yeah, we always listen to that song when we're in the car. Let's start a tradition on our podcast. Yeah. At the start of June, we talk about Christmas traditions. Last year, we had the Christmas in July booked in with Marcus and Beth, but they got COVID, so they had to delay it. So we had Christmas in July and December.

So it was Christmas. That's what I said. It's like, no, it's Christmas in July. Should we do a Christmas in July? In July, though? Yeah, we'll do a... That can be one of our live streams. An ugly sweater thing? Yes.

Yeah. Great idea. Because I've always wanted to wear one, but it's too fucking hot. It's too hot in Australia. Yeah. Well, that was Marcus's thing. He's like, I want to wear the sweater. Yeah.

Oh, love that. Yeah, we'll do that. Okay, we'll do that. Put that on the list. Things you love to see. We love to finish an episode with things that make us smile. And nothing makes me smile more than runner ducks. What's a runner duck?

Oh, Tony. They're ducks that, like, they don't fly, they just run. But they're, like, super cute and they have, like, personalities and they hang around with friends and stuff. So Bridget and I really want to, because we're looking to buy a house. I know you've mentioned it, Ryan. No, it's exciting. And we're looking at some, you know, a bit out of town,

a bit more space, and Bridget was like, I'd love to get, like, three or four runner ducks. And we love, because they, like, because they're great for the environment because they, like, pick out all the slugs and weeds. Yeah. So they kind of, like, keep your yard in order. Yeah. And they're super cute and they're funny.

Anyway, thanks to Holly for posting in the Tony and Ryan Facebook group. She posted a picture about the runner ducks and was like, is this a real thing in Australia? And they were, like, dressed up and they were playing with each other because they're super fucking cute. And I'll often see a video online of, like, the dog playing with the duck and the duck, because they all get along with everyone.

Oh, I've seen those videos. Is that an Australian thing? Because, as you know, my dog BJ just loves a cuddle and a play. He's not, like, aggressive. So we're like, oh, he would be friends with the ducks. Oh, that's so cute. And I was like, my world's collided because I've got my tarp world and I've got my runner duck world.

You can listen to Runner Ducks on Spotify each morning, daily podcast. Don't put it on repeat. Don't put it on repeat. It is repetitive. There's only so much you can talk about. And this is it. And I've covered it all. But things I love to see, runner ducks.

Love that. So when are you getting them? Well, we need the house first. As you can imagine, multiple ducks, because they need friends. In your house. In my tiny little house in town with the dog. Yeah. Full house. Yeah, I get it. And my love to see it to round out the Tony

and Ryan week is a message from Natalie Dowd, who said that she cancelled her gym membership so she could be a Patreon. I approve of all of this message. To be fair, haven't, she says, Natalie. To be fair, I haven't been in three years, but now you get my $10 a month instead. Hey, at least you're using this subscription.

Exactly. So I feel like you're still not going to the gym, but maybe you could go for a walk while you listen to this podcast instead or do whatever you fucking want. Yeah, or fucking don't do that. Yeah, I don't. No judgment. Thanks for that, Natalie.

Love to see that. Hey, from a couple of loaves, we appreciate that. Yeah, when life imitates art. Really makes sense. Thank you so much for listening for the week. when life imitates art. Really makes sense. Thank you so much for listening for the week.

Give us a meow meow or a thumbs up or a five star of meow wherever you listen. Really. See you on meow day. There you go. Love you, bye.