Toni and Ryan - Public Wank Blanket

Episode Date: August 9, 2023

I saw Barbie and have some thoughts. Love u! Toni xoCheck out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast. I'm actually not going to tell you who this approver is, but you will know them. Okay. So. Is it Beyonce? No. Imagine if it was. Like, that's crazy, but imagine.

You imagine if it was Beyonce? Is it? Hello? Hello. Can I get you to pronounce your name? Lenina. Oh, Lenina Brunettina-Tona. It's Liana.

Lenina Brunettina-Tona. Oh, Liana. Hello. How are you? Liana Bruschetti. How are you doing? I'm good. How are you guys?

Oh, I feel like I've been talking about you and talking to you on Instagram and through Patreon for so long. Well, thank you so much for, A, being a part of the Patreon and supporting the pod, but, B, being so frequent in the group and dropping bombs, and, C, being so tolerant of our inability to say your name. So, Liana Bruschetti, thank you so much. And will you approve this podcast?

Yes, of course I will. Yay! Hi, it's Leninia from Middlesbrough in the UK, and I approve this podcast. All right, coming up today. Do you remember that old ad and it was like the further you get from the beach, your bathers turn into undies? Yes. And it was like bathers, bathers, bathers, undies.

What was the rule? About 100 metres? Well, I think it was like, bathers, bathers, bathers, undies. What was the rule? About 100 metres? Well, I think it was just that, like, if you continue wearing your bathers everywhere, they're not bathers anymore. No. That eventually... You're just a guy wearing underwear in the street. Well, yeah, exactly right.

I want to know how casual you can go at the cinema. Yeah, righto. Like, when a tracky pant... Are they still tracky pants when you're out in public? I know you get the... And I'm not adding you because you're wearing tracky pants right now. I was like, this feels pretty pointed and aggressive. So you, I know we'll get to this, but you kind of live close to the cinema.

I do. So if you're like, if I'm on my couch in my like curled up watching movie clothes. And I trotted around the corner to the cinema, what would that mean? What would that mean what would that look like watching a movie on the couch to watching uh a bigger movie on a slightly smaller couch yeah what's the difference what's the difference uh first normal or nah people submit these to the tony and ryan facebook group uh it's tony and ryan podcast i'm sorry i just always forget about my headphones oh you're panicking panicking. I'm panicking. Panicking.

Sorry. But please keep submitting them. There's a thread in the Facebook group and I'm loving it. Sick. Rebecca asks. Hi, Rebecca. Is it normal or nah to have an undying urge to put a knife into the toaster when knowing full fucking well I would blow the fuck up if I actually did it?

But like you just have that like. Intrusive thought. Is that what it's called? When knowing full fucking well I would blow the fuck up if I actually did it. But, like, you just have that, like. Intrusive thought. Is that what it's called? Yes. Yeah. Where you just picture yourself doing something fucked for a second and then you go, whoa. Don't give in to that. Yeah.

Don't indulge that intrusive thought. At the moment, normal, by the way. Yeah. Because at the moment there is, like, a display of beer cans in our office. There is. And it's like on the top of like a little kind of plinth thing like at the top of the stairs. Yeah.

And it's set up like bowling pins kind of thing and I just really want to like shove my head through it and knock them all over. And every time I fucking see it, I'm just like, oh, wouldn't that be good? And then I'm like, Tony Louise Lodge, you are in an office. Do you want to do it? No.

No, we can't because they'll all explode. Yeah. And there's other people that work here. I've got my phone. I'm just going to, should we just go do it right now? No, because I don't want to bother everybody else. That's why it's an intrusive thought. It's not something you're supposed to do.

Are we ready? So what we're going to do is we're going to walk out there, you're just going to headbutt it, and then we're just going to walk back in and, like, nothing ever happened. But maybe Producer Cam could stay out there and clean it up so that no one gets upset. This is a thing you can't think about, an intrusive thought.

Watch this, guys. gets upset this is the thing you can't think about an intrusive thought watch this space how do you feel um Exhilarated. My head does hurt a little bit. It did actually hurt. Full cans. Yeah, full cans, exactly, and I went straight into it. I guess that that is unlike now a cautionary tale of, like, don't indulge the intrusive thought because it's quite sore. And obviously we don't want – what was this lovely lady's name?

Rebecca. We don't want Rebecca to put her knife in a toaster. Obviously we do not want that. If you know someone called Rebecca, tag them in the episode thread, tag them in this video. If they don't reply, go check on them. Yeah, just check on them. Just check on them.

Yeah, I think that's a good call. This is from Chelsea. Hi, Chelsea. My sister-in-law's name is Chelsea. When someone new follows you on Instagram, does anyone else stalk their own profile just to see what the new follower is seeing? Just as like bring yourself up to speed. Where am I at?

Yeah. Look at your own profile and go, oh, they're going to see that. They're going to see that. Yeah. Oh, I've shown a bit of nip there. I'd say that that's probably normal. Yeah, I'd say that's normal. I remember back in the day on like Facebook,

you used to be able to, there was a button that was like view as public. Yeah. And so you could see what people who like weren't your friends would see. I remember checking it to see like like, what personal information popped up. Oh, okay. Because you know how, well, it used to be like, went to this school, he works here or whatever. Well, I just don't think that people put the information in.

Yeah. But, like, you would put all your information in. They would be like, I'm pretty sure people used to put, like, their phone numbers on Facebook and stuff. If something asked me, sorry, if someone someone if a website asked me for my phone number it's just like no yeah like i'm not gonna comply with your rules um so i think that is normal because yeah back in the day or like if i did a new myspace layout i would like look at it non-stop to be like yeah that's looking good what song did you have as your myspace song oh i had so

many i can't i probably couldn't even fucking was that your personality um like music on myspace yes i'd probably have like a little indie um like hardcore band would have probably been most of my okay profile songs yeah like oh my god you haven't heard of this band weird like that like, my whole thing. Really? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Glad I met you now. Yeah. It wasn't good. Do you remember a good one of yours?

It would have been, like, John Butler Trio. Oh, nice. Yeah, yeah. Hey, Cam always gives me shit about liking John Butler Trio. No, I really like him. Them? Them. The three of them.

No. I like him. Them? Them. The three of them. Tony Lodge can be stressed and anxious about anything. True. Does anyone else get physically ill and stressed by the thought of sleeping with socks on?

Because apparently it's normal for Tony. 100% normal. Do you know what really stresses me out? The idea of socks just being in the bed. Because when you wake up, they're never still on. Why not? What are you doing with your feet when you're- Well, they just, like, come off in the night or I kick them off, I guess, if I'm hot. Are you getting the right size socks?

Can you buy socks that are too big? They come in sizes. Yeah, but, like, not really. No, but they do. Yeah, like, obviously my foot wouldn't fit into, like, a baby sock. Yeah. But once you get beyond a certain point, all socks are going to fit. No.

Are you wearing Torbs' socks and that's why they're falling off in the sleep? No, I wouldn't wear his socks to bed because he wears, like, business kind of socks. Okay, yeah, that's not what you want to say. Like the ones with like patterns and shit on them, like whatever. So you wake up in the morning, your feet are bare and there's just socks somewhere. There's just socks like stray in the bed. It's a bit like sometimes for anyone with like big boobs, if you go to sleep in a singlet and you wake up and like one tits out.

big boobs if you go to sleep in a singlet and you wake up and, like, one tit's out. And, like, you just can't control it and just one tit's popped out through the night. Is that stressful? Because you wake up and you're like, there's tits in the bed. Well, yeah, there's just straight tits in the bed. They can't be controlled. Apparently.

This is from Scott. Hi, Scott. Is there anything worse than being stuck behind a slow car? Scott says, if I'm stuck behind a slow car, I'll swerve out a bit so cars behind me know that it's not me who's being the slow. His words. His words. Scott says, I think this has been mentioned on the podcast before, but I really need to hear it again to hear that other people also do this.

I think very early in the podcast we talked about this. I'm a nah. I've never done that. But you on the record said that normal for you. Yeah, but I guess my question is because you didn't know of the concept. Now that you have heard the concept, has it like. I don't think so. Well, I haven't done it since.

Okay. But also, I've got, like, a low car. Right. So, I don't think that, like, if there was anyone behind me, they'd be able to see that it's... Yeah, all the SUVs in the city, they'll see each other over the top. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, they're all at this height and I'm just, like, in my hatchback.

Oh, when you said low car, I'm like, have you got the McLaren out? Oh, yeah, I've dropped it right down. I can't go over speed bumps. It's so inconvenient. So where we do this podcast, down the road is like Maserati, Ferrari, Porsche. But where we are, there's tram tracks. The roads are fucked. There's potholes everywhere.

And these cars are like three millimetres off the ground and they can't drive out the driveway. No. And because all of the driveways like dip down and then into the thing. Yeah. To get into my like apartment. Oh, you couldn't. Yeah, you just couldn't.

You can't. You actually can't get in there. So who, what's the point of these things? Well, I guess it's just make you feel good, isn't it? But why are they down the road here? I actually don't know. Because you can't drive them out of the driveway of the car place. And there's also-

Like, you buy it and you go, well, now what do I do with it? You know how you would expect, like, the shops in an area service the area that you're in? Yeah. You know how, like, half of Richmond probably wouldn't be serviced by those places? Two-thirds, maybe? Yeah, how do we say this delicately? You know, like, some parts of Richmond are, like, pretty scary. probably wouldn't be serviced by those places. Two-thirds maybe. Yeah, how do we say this delicately? You know, like some parts of Richmond are pretty scary.

I don't think they're getting Ferraris out of a bum bag and selling it for cash. Yeah. I'll meet you on the corner at 7. You want a Ferrari? Yeah. I've got a Maz ready to go if you're interested. Make sure you don't park in the driveway.

You know what I mean? So it just like is so weird to me. Yeah, it really is. That those car shops are here. Shops. Dealers. They're still dealers. Hi, it's Lenina from Middlesbrough in the UK,

and you are listening to Tony and Ryan. A massive shout-out to a few of our champion top beyonds from the Patreon. Brittany Newton, love to see you, Britt. Thanks, Britt. Thank you. Jake the Snake. Oh, excuse me. see it, Britt. Thanks, Britt. Thank you. Jake the Snake. Oh, excuse me. Thank you, Jake.

Nice to meet you. Samantha Green. Catterly Meow. Catterly Meow. Thank you. And Nikki Monroe. Thank you very much for being part of the Patreon. Fucking love to see it.

Hope that you liked the live stream, the marathon live stream. The art heist. The art heist. Unsuccessful art heist. Unsuccessful art heist. We're heist. Unsuccessful art heist. Unsuccessful art heist. We're going again today. Are we going again today? So, I've actually got a rent inspection today.

Also, the really, like, rich NBA players are coming in to work. So, we might- Remember? Yeah, I forgot about that. So, we might not be able to steal the stuff to do the art heist again. Oh, we can't heist for the heist because it's unheistable at that point in time. Well, yeah. There's NBA players coming into the building.

So every time you say NBA, because I'm so used to you saying NBA, like because you're doing your NBA at uni. So you're like NBA players. I'm like, oh, like big finance guys. Big players in the tech space. I'm like American Psycho. guys big players in the tech space like um american psycho like they're they're banker guys but they're like players oh no i'm like you polo ralph lauren on because there's some players like but it's like P-L-A-Y-A-Z. No, they're basketballers. Yeah. Yeah, NBA. Not MBA.

Yeah. Yeah. But you can say that. I think it makes sense. Anyway, I asked before how far away from the beach until your bathers become underwear and you're just a guy wearing undies in the street. How casual can you go to the cinema?

So I'm a comfy girl i dress for comfort not for speed so when someone says what's tony lodge's like fashion style i would say comfort yeah like i wear jeans and a t-shirt or a jumper or like i wear sneakers all the time like it's not you know i genuinely prefer to be comfortable i like to think that I look pretty cool sometimes, but, like, generally I like to be comfy. And it's only probably, you know how people say, like, oh, as you get older you start to not care. Has that started?

I think so. Did that ever not be the case? I think also since starting the pod I feel, like, a bit more confident too. So I'm a bit like, you know what, I'm just going to live my best life. Yeah, fuck everyone else. Do you know what I mean? Yeah.

Anyway, so I was kind of talking to Torbs. We were like, why don't we see if we can go and see Barbie over the weekend? Great. Obviously, it's like doing the rounds. Everyone's fucking talking about it. You can't not know that Barbie's coming out. You know what I mean? Yeah.

And we were going to a session at like 5.15. So kind of like it wasn't like a date because it wasn't at night. It was like a day activity. Are you anti-day dates? Oh, no, but it just like, you know when you see a couple, whether they're on a first date or they've been together for 10 years, when you see a couple at the cinema at night time, you go, oh, they're out together. Yeah. And I didn't feel like at 5pm that we would have looked like we were out on a date. No, you'd just go out to the shops on a Saturday.

Yeah, two bros going to the cinema. Yeah, you went to Coles, pick up some bread and some milk and you go, oh, should we catch a Barbie film? Should we catch the Barbie movie? Everyone's talking about it. Everything's fucking pink. You can't miss it, you know. Sure. I'm talking to Torbs. I'm like, how cash do you think I can go to the cinema? Because I don't really want to wear jeans because that's going to be uncomfortable.

Yeah. And I'm like, I wish that I could just go over in my hoodie. Like, you know, the big oversized, like, blanket. So, it's not a hoodie, but it's like a dress almost. It's like a lined nightie with a hood on it. You didn't wear the Red Rooster one. No. Well, I was just like, wouldn't it be great if you could go to the cinema wearing your hoodie?

So I posted on my Instagram story. Okay. And I was like- Did you do a poll? I did like a sliding scale. So I was like- Oh, actually, no, I voted on this. So on a sliding scale of jeans and a nice top to Udi,

where on the comfort scale can you sit when you go to the cinemas at 5pm on a Saturday? Can we all just take a moment to appreciate the top end of the formal scale was jeans and a T-shirt? Jeans and a nice top, which is a joke within itself because that's like a girl joke. Going out top? Yeah, what are you wearing tonight?

Oh, just jeans and a nice top, babe. But like for the sake of the scale, you see where I'm getting at? Yeah, but like I'm obviously not going to wear a dress and heels to the cinema because that's just not my style. But just get a full scope of the scale. Well, you can't go too wide. Then people are, you know, it's not a very. It's too fiddly.

Yes, exactly. So I was kind of thinking about it from the perspective of what I would wear. The Tony scale. Yes, the Tony's comfort of scale, TM. And it ended up landing kind of three quarters down. So people were like, don't wear jeans and a nice top, but don't wear an Udi. So hang on, three quarters closer to which side?

Towards Udi. Really? Yes. Fuck yeah. So there were people that fucking locked in uddy and they were like bitch where the enough to drag the the average yes yes and then i got a lot of messages like oh my god i went and saw barbie with my friends and we all got dressed up in pink and it was great and i was like well i'm not doing that that's why it's not an option yeah because if i was going with a bunch

of girlfriends and we were all getting to of course like I would have like loved doing the fun thing. Anyway, so I'm like, what can you wear? But did you take the results on board and like as blasphemy, like this is what I'm doing? Well, yeah, because I was like, okay, I'm not going to wear an hoodie. That's not really my style. Even I fucking would have loved it. No, no, no.

So it wasn't quite hoodie. So I ended up going with like elasticated linen pants. Was it an elasticated ankle? No, no, no. They're like, you know those black pants I wear all the time? They're like high-waisted. They're like wide at the bottom. Oh, okay, yeah.

Yeah, I wore those with like just like big, thick, fluffy socks and runners and just like a big jumper. Okay. Was it a hoodie? No, it was just like a crew neck like gray jumper but it's like big and comfy i wore like a bralette like so i didn't even have like underwire in my bra like it was really cash and fun underwire is fucking old news see you later yeah anyway that's a different fucking topic for another day rather down producer cam anyway um so then i was like

wouldn't it be great though if you could take like take, like, okay, I'm not going to wear an hoodie. The people have spoken. Wouldn't it be great if you could take, like, a blanket to the cinema? It's actually rude that you can't. I agree. So I posted that on my story and I was like, can you take a blanket? People were like, no. Then I was like, hang on, why don't cinemas have blankets?

Oh, no. Okay. Handjobs. Yeah. So then everyone was like, they'd be covered in cum. Yeah, jizz. Jizz. All just jizz.

Literally jizz town. Like, those blankets would be like, you crack them in half. Yeah. That would be disgusting. Yeah. So then I- We had a dedicated jizz blanket at a- because that's when you're like, oh, if this guy's going to get hit, just pass him the blanket.

When? At a, like a, I think it must have been like a school camp or something. We can't just be fucking getting handjobs willy-nilly on the bus. Give that guy a blanket. I don't know if you know what you've just said. Wait, so you were on a camp? I think the moral of what I'm getting at is that communal blankets are not good. Communal.

Anyway. Yeah, no. communal blankets are not good communal anyway um yeah no you don't you that would be like putting on the socks at a shoe store oh yeah athletes full she's everywhere oh disgusting yeah absolutely not actually would be significantly worse than that however have we and i know we've already left the studio for one thrilling stunt this morning. Who says you can't take a blanket to the cinema? If you rocked up with a blanket, what, are they going to turn you away? Surely they're not going to turn you away. That's what I mean.

That's what I was thinking as well. But then so people kind of- Let's take a blanket to see Oppenheimer at IMAX. Or is that not a blanket movie? Well, so the other good point, and you raise a good question, because the other good point that I got, basically half of my DMs were, that'll be covered in cum, and the other good point, and you raise a good question because the other good point that I got, basically half of my DMs were that'll be covered in cum and the other half were you will fall asleep. Like if you get too cosy in the cinema, you're just going to-

No, fake news. You sat under a blanket for 45 hours straight during a live stream and didn't sleep. That's true. Thank you. I appreciate that. I've actually never seen someone under a blanket not sleeping more than you. Thank you.

I appreciate that. You're welcome. That was for work than you. Thank you. Yeah. I appreciate that. You're welcome. That was for work, though. This was for pleasure. Oh, okay. Sorry, my mistake. That's where the cum comes in. Yeah.

Oh, the pleasure. Anyway, and so literally split 50-50 pretty much in my DMs. People were like, that's going to be covered in cum or you'll fall asleep. Yep. And I was like, that is a really good point because I'm relaxed. It's Saturday. I'm probably going to nod off. And then I was like, would that really happen?

I didn't take a blanket, but we get to the cinema, we sit down and find our spot, and the Barbie movie is like two hours long and the cinema is filled with women pretty much. I think I spotted like maybe a handful of boyfriends. But was it like plus one boyfriends, you know what I mean? Like that had been dragged along. No one looked like they weren't keen to be there, but there were lots of groups of girls or like mums

and a few daughters that had all come along. Or like it looked like two mums in a group, so maybe the mums were sisters and it was all their like nieces and daughters and stuff. It was really, really nice. And right at the back of the cinema near us, this woman comes in with her husband and he was- Blanket?

Handjob? No blanket. But the movie's like two hours long, right? And about halfway through, we hear like a couple of little snores. No. And like Torbs and I kind of like look at each other and we like smile like, oh, someone's fucking passed out. And he goes, lucky you didn't bring the blanket. Like that would have been you. Everyone, like, look at each other and we, like, smile. Like, oh, someone's fucking passed out. And he goes, lucky you didn't bring the blanket.

Like, that would have been you. Everyone's like, what a dumb bitch. That would have been you. Yeah, that could have been you. And then, like, the storm kind of happens and we kind of all move on. And the movie's pretty loud and fun and whatever. Then there is, like, a part towards the end of the movie that's very quiet and, like, very meaningful. And it's, like, a beautiful part of the end of the movie that's very quiet and, like, very meaningful.

And it's, like, a beautiful part of the film. And this interaction's happening on the screen. And he hears... Of this, like, old man. Surely the lady's not, whacking him like, Trevor! Right. If that was your partner or someone that was next to you, surely you're going, wake the fuck up.

Yeah. And it's this beautiful part of the movie. Everyone's looking up at the screen, tearing up, beautiful scenes. Do you cry? I couldn't stop laughing because this guy is like fucking starting a fucking lawnmower out the back of the cinema. And I just couldn't believe it. I was like, how could you not be there for the person you'd gone

to the cinema with and not wake them up? That's on her. Oh, my God. I would be mortified if that was me. Torbs and I have the same, like, understanding, like, on a plane. Like, if you fall asleep on a plane and you start to fucking let the lawnmower go, you've got to kind of, oh, yep, sweetie. Do we have that understanding?

I think so. But have you woken me up from snoring on a plane? You've never snored on a plane next to me. Okay. But we have the same understanding, I feel, with food. Wake me up for food. Wake me up for food? Wake me up for food. Wake me up if plane next to me. Okay. But we have the same understanding, I feel, with food. Wake me up for food. Wake me up for food?

Wake me up for food. Wake me up if I'm snoring. Yep. That's fine. No jizzing without a blanket. No jizzing without a blanket. That's the rule. The three rules of travelling with friends. And anyway, so yeah, I just couldn't believe it.

I was like, that could have been me, but I just couldn't believe it. I think PSA, if you're with someone anywhere and they start snoring, they can't help it. They're asleep. They can't fucking help that. But this guy also, you know what really pissed me off? He was out the back in Lux. So this guy has paid $50 or whatever.

It's like $100 for two seats to fall asleep. I'm not deliberately trying to flap you here. Did you consider going and waking him up? No way. You're going to fall asleep. I'm not deliberately trying to flap you here. Uh-huh. Did you consider going and waking him up? No way. Why not? Because that would be more, I was about to say interruptful. That would be more disruptive.

Yeah, but then it would be done though. No, but then I get up and go, oh, sorry, oh, sorry. Mate, can you like. Did anyone, because obviously other people were having the same conversations you and Torb. So everyone else is probably like, who the fuck is going other people were having the same conversations you and Torbz. So everyone else is probably like, who the fuck's going to go? You know in. Should we go and wake him? How it's like pods.

No. Do we live in the same planet when it comes to movies? It's like two seats together and they've got like a table in the middle. Okay. So you're not directly next to the next person. So it's not as if the next person that was next to them could have. Yeah, give them a little elbow. Or gone.

You know when you do like this. You infamously don't finish the popcorn. No. Did you feel like lobbing a stray? I would never do that. That is the dumbest question ever. I would never do that. His mouth opened, his lobber didn't land in it, so he's like.

I just couldn't believe that the person he was with didn't fucking say anything. What a bitch. Or maybe she couldn't wake him up. I'm trying. It was a big snore. Like, I don't mean like a little like, it was like fucking like midnight snores, like that deep sleep snores. Okay.

Now, there's something that creates a deeper sleep than a regular sleep. Did he have a blanket across the top of his lap? I couldn't say, but I can only assume. That she jacked him off. Yeah, she jerked him off. The blanket got covered in cum and then he fell asleep. Good night nurse. Sounds actually quite good.

I would pay $50 for that. Yeah, many people have paid a lot more. Yeah, I wouldn't complain. I got jerked off at the cinema and then fell asleep in the air con because it's such a great temperature in there. It's beautiful. It is beautiful. Tony, out of five stars, what would you rate the Barbie film?

Three or four? Three and a half? Not a raring five out of five? I liked the movie. I thought it was really fun and i also loved the throwbacks to all of the like barbie stuff because i i loved barbies as a kid like i love playing barbies so looking at the outfits and like the dream house and stuff i thought all the little details are really funny yeah um and obviously not to spoil anything, but there's like some really lovely bits that happen in the film.

Yeah. But I probably, I would say that I was over. Stimulated? Well, I'm in the blanket. No, like I think I was maybe a bit fatigued by Barbie by the time I saw it. Yeah. Because it's been everywhere for months. Like the marketing was huge and really cool and they made heaps of cool shit.

And by the time you got there, you were almost done. I'm done with Barbie. I was Barbie'd out a little bit. But having said that, I liked the movie and I think it would be really nice for like I like the way that it's brought people together. Like I said, there was heaps of girl groups that had gone in and seen it together. I thought that was really nice.

Bringing back cinema. Yeah. Yeah. Cinema's not dead. I like going to the cinema. Yeah. I do enjoy the theatre, no pun intended, of like going to the cinema. Yeah.

Anyway. I haven't seen either, but I want to go see both. Yeah, I reckon. So, Torbs and I have tickets for Oppenheimer. Yeah. But that's like a serious. We're going to like the fucking. Don't you fucking dare.

No blanket. No, no, I wouldn't take a blanket there. Full tuxedo. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm going to. Ball gown, heels. Thank you.

Hair extensions, everything. Yeah. Yeah. Braids? And sit there like this. Yeah. Glasses. Shallow and pedantic. Even if you don't need glasses. Glasses. Yeah. And sit there like this. Yeah, glasses. Shallow and pedantic. Even if you don't need glasses, glasses.

Yeah, wear my glasses. No, I'm really excited about it, but Torbs and I have tickets for that, so we'll have seen the double eventually. I've got what you'll have to see, but I want to start with like a, I don't know if you'd call this a cryptic or a theoretical or something. Would you, if given the chance, want to live forever? No. Yeah.

Instantly no. Yeah. I could not. I could not. How exhausting. Yeah. Also. Give a guy a break.

I just think, like, it's good and it's short. You know what I mean? I've said that line many times. Don't worry, I'm not the first. So I was at the cinema. It's short, but it's good. It's good. I couldn't watch Torb's die and, like, go on without, like, beyond that.

So I've actually shotgunned with Bridge going first. Oh, same. Yeah. And I'm like, if you think you're going to go, let me know, because I'll fucking take care of it. I actually said in my vows, until death Dying first. Oh, same. Yeah. And I'm like, if you think you're going to go, let me know because I'll fucking take care of it. I actually said in my vows, until death do me part. And that's not just because you're bad at English. Yeah, no.

That's not just because I'm a fuckhead. Good news for people that do want to live forever. We now have the first cryogenic freezing facility in the southern hemisphere. It's open in Australia, which aims to preserve human remains in liquid nitrogen in the hope they will be able to be thawed out and reanimated in the future. I mean, it would be quite scary to re, like, if you died, because you have to die to be disneyed yep um so did disney die i thought he got put in the ice tank before no no but you have to like die yeah to like do it um i can you imagine how fucking scary waking up like you know me at 3 p.m on a thursday if i fall asleep on the couch i wake up what fucking year is it yeah like is it tomorrow why is there a blanket on me am i in the cinema have

i been jizzed on and who by you know like i just i can't imagine how scary the wake-up process would be like in austin powers yeah when i think anytime I think of cryogenic freezing, I just think of Austin Powers. It'd be like raises to the top. Yeah. And just the world like moving around you. Yeah. It'd be terrifying. So the first ever cryogenic freezing in the southern hemisphere is in Australia.

Guess which town it's in. It's in Toowoomba. No. Too fast to Wumba. I thought they've gotten ahead of themselves there. Too cold to... Anyway, it's in. And I sent you a link.

I fucked your punchline. No, no. It's just because you would just assume Melbourne or Sydney, right? Nah. Nah, nah, nah. You need heaps of space. Open the link I've just sent you. It's in a town.

It's in Holbrook. Holbrook. You could get there on the train. There's A-line, $8.60 the whole way. A thousand people live in Holbrook. It's known for the vanilla slice. And have a look at the fucking shed that it's in. That's the place.

Check out that picture. That's insane. Does that look like a place you'd fucking shed that it's in. That's the place. Check out that picture. That's insane. Does that look like a place you'd trust with your remain? No. They go, yeah, we'll look after you. Yeah, you'll be reanimated in a few years. The manager and director, who already has 30 paid up customers, said there are no guarantees. And it's this guy.

There are no guarantees. And we make it very clear to all the people who have joined us. Oh, hang on. So 44 people on the books, 34 have already paid, which you just said. Yep. $50,000 to $70,000. Yeah. To be put in what looks like a barn shed in the back of some paddock somewhere.

Question. Sure. Is that how expensive you would have thought it would be? I would have thought it'd be way more than that. Really? Yeah. It's extending your life. That's a... Would you say

it's a bargain? Maybe it's cheaper in Holbrook. Maybe if you went to a Sydney facility. So because this is a... It's a start-up and it's a new idea. Yeah. What happens if before they unfreeze you, they run out of cash?

Well, I guess if they're saying, like, no guarantees. But what do they do with the body? They just empty it into the sewer? No, I'd say that they... Like pour it into the river? They would have to cremate it and, like, let your family have a funeral? They would have a funeral and you'd... Would you?

Well, you're not dead dead. You're only dead. Yeah. You're not dead dead. Dead dead. I actually don't know. Ask the guy. Message him on Instagram.

Well, Holbrook was known as the home of the vanilla slice. Yeah. Now it's known as the home of the vanilla slice. And, oh, my God, do you reckon that's where they get the cream for the slice from? Speaking of life-changing news. What's happened? My love to see it is that I was on TV.

Fuck yeah. Well. I thought you were going to say you were married or pregnant. Well, I think that I was on TV. Sorry. Hang on. Hang on. Yeah.

You were on TV and now you think you're on TV. I might have was on TV. Sorry, hang on, hang on. Yeah. You were on TV and now you think you're on TV. I might have been on TV. So I was watching Hunted Australia the other week. No. And there was like people were hiding out in Richmond where I live. Because the last one they were down the street. Yeah, at that cafe, Thousand Blessings. And like I couldn't see the last one, they were down the street. Yeah, at that cafe, Thousand Blessings. And, like, I couldn't see the number plate,

but in the background of one of the shots, there was a black Audi. And that could have... You could have been someone's getaway driver. Well, like, it was a black car. I'm pretty sure that it was an Audi. So you can't confirm the car brand. So there was a black car in a suburb with 100,000 people. How could it not have been you?

There was a black car and I'm pretty sure it was mine. Yeah. Yeah. That's fucking cool. Isn't it? If they had knocked on your window and said. Oh, 100%. Yep.

I actually said to Torbs, I was like, next time they're filming, I'm just going to drive around and hope that I get to help someone. And go, do you mind if I pop this on my Instagram story? That's pretty cool. You're famous. Yeah. I'm famous. I know. That's fucking cool. Thanks. I pop this on my Instagram story? That's pretty cool. You're famous. That's my car. I'm famous, I know.

That's fucking cool. Thanks. I love to see that. I do love to see that. I literally made Torbs rewind it. I was like, oh, my God, I think that was my car. Rewind it? Were you watching it on a VHS?

Ten Play. Big fan. Yeah. I was going to say, rewinding live TV, not in this generation, mate. Yeah, wouldn't have thought so, mate. Wouldn't have thought so. Anyway, you love to see that, maybe. You might love to see that on the TV. Tomorrow on the show.

One of my favourite things and one of Tony's least favourite things come together. There's Kardashian slander and there's terrible coincidences. I actually won't be part of this. I won't come in tomorrow. But it is a video show. All right, we'll see you tomorrow. There could be fighting words. If you've seen the Facebook group,

you probably already know what's going to get Tony fired up. Love you. Love you, bye.