Toni and Ryan - Reservoir Dogs

Episode Date: July 23, 2023

Clickbait tragedies and another other seperate tragedy. Love ya!Check out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast. My name is Ryan. This is Dr. Author Tony Lodge, and we are calling Israel and this is Draw. Hello? Hello, is that Draw? Yes. Hi, Draw, it's Tony and Ryan. Hey, hi. Now, where do we find you today? What are we interrupting? I was just in bed.

Well, yeah, Tony's now imagining you just laying there being a model, lounged across the mattress. Someone's feeding me grapes like this. Delicious. Droll, will you approve today's episode? Yeah, absolutely. Woo-hoo! Hey, it's Droll from from Israel and I approve this podcast.

All right, coming up today, we heard last week about carefree, last-minute fun Tony. And is it fair to say over the weekend this new persona was... She's left the building. Okay, I was going to say tested. Oh, okay. We're not giving all the way up yet. Well, I mean, to be fair, you were put in a situation

that would flap most people. Thank you. I appreciate that from you because I know that you are like mostly sincerely unflappable um my boyfriend torbs though however is also very unflappable i've probably seen him flapped like maybe twice in our relationship yeah and was he flapped this time and this was the third time oh okay we'll get there yeah we'll get there yeah um i'd like to start off though with something i guess kind of along the same line, that I'm a huge fucking sucker. Yeah.

Like, I am a wet dream for a marketing department. Like, you know how when you talk about avatars in business and you go like, who are we marketing this to? Like, who is our ultimate audience or whatever? It is me. Like, it is like a photo of me i like you'd be too easy because the marketing partners oh we don't need to try like we'll get her anyway oh yeah like she's a given yeah like cast the net wider than her yeah um but that's actually such a good point like you don't need to try it like yeah i it's the best product

ever oh like do you know what i'm actually really worried about? You know how in New York there's like that running joke that it's like, oh, the best pizza in New York, but there's like eight on the same street that say that? I'm going to be walking down the street and go, best pizza in New York, pop in. Walk down the street and go, oh, best pizza in New York, jump in. Hey, Tony, what did you do this afternoon? I went to eight pizza places.

And they all reckon they're the best and they were lovely. And they were all correct. Yeah, and I thought they were all correct. Yeah. And I thought they were all as good as each other, as good as the last. Yep. And so I'm a little bit worried about that in America, but I digress.

I am also like the queen of FOMO. So when people- But that market is, that's part of the plan. Yeah, because I want to be part of like the conversation. And so when I get 100 left they'll never be made again doesn't that suck in no doesn't that suck and like the reason there's only 100 left is because you're not making any more because they suck no one tells supreme that that's why um but that's good cultural information's good gear. Cultural information.

Pop culture. Anyway, but this extends to not only me buying ridiculous things that I see on TikTok or Instagram or a sponsored ad. It also extends to things like, oh, I need to listen to that band because I feel like I'm missing out. It also extends to a clickbait fucking headline. Yep. I think that I am single-handedly keeping the Daily Mail afloat.

Yeah, it actually takes a village, except for in this circumstance, it's just me. Tony Village Lodge. I see a headline, and no matter how salacious, I go, I wonder what's going on. And they actually, there is a big photo of you at the Daily Mail and when you're writing a headline, think about how you would suck this dumb bitch in.

Yeah, and they do it every time. They all deserve a pay rise and I'm paying for it basically out of my pocket. I'm viewing ads and paying their mortgages. Like it's ridiculous. You're welcome. But so whenever I see a headline, even one that I know is not true, I go, well, how have they spun that?

So even if I suspect that it's not accurate, I still go, well, how have they reached that? Or like what are they saying to get to that point? Or even if I've like listened to a podcast or seen the new episode of The Bachelor and they go, oh, well, what's happened here? get to that point or even if i've like listened to a podcast or seen the new episode of the bachelor and they go oh well what's happened here i go well i know that that wasn't the outcome but did i miss something like i just assume that i have missed the thing i saw this headline the other day and even this one went too far for me really still? Still clicked on it. And it says hidden

detail in Officeworks logo stuns. Stuns. That's the headline, right? Officeworks. Officeworks. The stationery store. So I'm going to show you like what their logo is. Like this is like what would be on the front of a shop. Yeah.

Of an Officeworks store. It just says the sign Officeworks it's got red dots under it and a pin. And a pin. Like a push pin. Yeah. And on the headline. I'm ready to be stunned. Well, on the headline, it has that zoomed in with a big red circle around the O and

the two Fs at the beginning of Officeworks. Okay. So I'm like, I'm going, hey, you haven't got me yet. Yep. But I'm looking at the O and the FF real close. Real close. And I'm trying to figure out what it is. I can't see anything.

And then they go, oh, it is now being shortened to this. So it's instead of like Officeworks is the full word, it's an O and a W with the red lines that are normally below the word going across the middle, the centre of the thing. I'm waiting to be stunned. Oh, well, what do you mean? You can't tell what that is? O for Office, W for Word.

So this is what they think is stunning. Oh, so hang on. There's no punchline. This is it. Oh, so they've just discovered abbreviations. Wait till they hear that the Australian Football League, sometimes called the AFL. Where did they come up with that?

That stunned me. Stuns. Stuns. That stuns. So they've said this, and then I'm reading the article. Like, me. Stuns. Stuns. That stuns. So they've said this and then I'm reading the article like, hang on, have I missed something? I'm like scrolling back to the top. And then there's all of these people like saying odd things

about like what they think it might be. Hang on. So they've gone to like out the front of an office where it's going, G'day, young punter. Yeah. What do you reckon this means? They've got all these comments from people being like, oh, I don't know. And they go, you won't believe it's also on the bag.

So then they've got the O and the W with the red line through the centre on the bag. I'm like, you're fucking reaching here. Like, what are you talking about? And then someone has made the comment, oh, it's obviously a person. Laying on the back with their legs. Are they presenting? I didn't look at it like that.

Their arms are out and they're just waiting for it. Like POV. It doesn't look like that. Anyway, and so they said, oh, how great that their new logo is a person. I've never seen a person like that in my goddamn life. No. There is just no way that that is supposed to be a person. Like they're really reaching.

And then, wouldn't you believe it, it goes cross-platform. And I see this tweet. And they said, oh, it's a conspiracy. The Officeworks new logo looks like Squids Games logo. No, it doesn't. You're really reaching there. No, it fucking doesn't. What are you fucking talking about?

Okay, here's the similarities. They're both symbols? They both have circles? Yeah. The circles are the only parts that are the same. Don't let the Daily Mail find out about the Olympic rings. Oh, that's what it looks like on the front of my Audi. Yeah.

What the fuck? All right. So I've been sucked into this article. That's bullshit. I've been sucked in for the last time. No, actually, no. I will not click on another article. After I've been burned in this way.

Incorrect news. I've actually got three articles, which I guarantee you want to know. Oh, no, don't, because the headlines are always juicy. Here's my favorite three. Okay. And trust me, there was a lot to choose from. That's one expensive holiday. Influencer Simone loses $75,000 diamond in the ocean

during her vacation in the Maldives. That happened to Kim Kardashian. Would you like to find out how? No. Yeah, I really want to know. That's one expensive holiday. No. Yeah, I really want to know.

That's one expensive holiday. Simone lost a $75,000 diamond earring in the ocean during her vacation in the Maldives. Or at least that's what her fans thought when she posted a comedy skit on Instagram. She was recreating a scene from Keeping Up With The Kardashians. And then it's like, oh, and while you're here, here's her in a bikini in 58 different ways. Gotcha.

Gotcha. I hate that. Or at least that's what her fans thought. Oh, that gets me. There's this guy who's really, really rich. He was a creator. What's the famous condom brand from Australia? Trojan or Lifestyles.

No. Skin, S-K-Y-N. Anyway, I'll come back to that. Johnny? The guy who created it is like worth, it's just like a guy in Sydney that created this brand. And he's now like an uber wealthy celebrity friend. Durex.

Chaos strikes celebrity wedding in Italy as the guests had to flee and evacuate. What happened? So this guy's married his now husband. Yeah. And it's like the hottest people from Sydney and they're, you know, on the beach in Greece like everyone else is at the moment. And then you see the words evacuate and flee. What happened?

Oh, see, I've been sucked in again. It turns out they had to evacuate the outdoor area and flee to the marquee because it looked like it might rain. Four seasons.

Four seasons. Michael Porter. And there was four seasons because they thought it was going to rain? Four seasons Four seasons Michael Porter And there was four seasons Because I thought it was going to rain Four seasons in a day That I would have clicked on that as well A celebrity wedding Is probably a bit of a stretch as well

Yeah You know how Chervo's now hosting Sunrise Yeah with Nat Barr Yep She's from Bunbury Fill in Sunrise TV host Reveals the real reason Natalie Barr has surprisingly disappeared

from our TV screens. Do you know she disappeared last week? I did see that this morning as well. Actually, I turned on Sunrise for Pippa. And it was Monique. And it was Monique, yeah. So Monique has revealed to the Daily Mail the real reason why Natalie Barr has surprisingly disappeared from our TV screens.

Is everything okay? Are you clicking? the real reason why Natalie Barr has surprisingly disappeared from our TV screen. Is everything okay? Are you clicking? Yeah, I've already clicked. Yeah, so she's taking an annual leave for a week. She's at the celebrity wedding where they had to evacuate. She's fleeing to the marquee with a $95,000 jewellery diamond ring. Hey, it's Jock from Israel and you're listening to Tony and Ryan. A massive shout out to a few of our champions from the Patreon.

Thomas Egan. Love to see it, Tomo. Cheers, mate. Jesse. Georgia. Samantha Macken. Hello Blooms. Oh, Hello Blooms.

Oh, my God. They're one of my favourite florists. Oh, of course. Do you remember when I went to that peonies party? Oh, yeah. That was them. Oh, hey, guys. Who are they?

Oh, Cleo from Hello Blooms is a big fan of the pod. Hey, Cleo. I'm sure she's listening. Hello, Cleo from Hello Blooms is a big fan of the pod. Hey, Cleo. I'm sure she's listening. Cleo and Kiefer Johnson. Oh, Kiefer Sutherland Johnson. Thank you so much for being part of the Patreon. We fucking love to see it and hope that you guys loved the live stream that we did last week. Yep.

If you want to do us and yourself a favor, click follow on the Spotify app. It helps you find us easier and it helps us on the back end. So really appreciate that as well. Yeah, it does help us on the back end. Your back end doesn't need any help though, sweetheart. So it's been a big weekend in my life. Welcome back to the office today though. Sorry.

Welcome back to the office. Good to have you in. Thank you. Thank you. It's a pleasure to be here. I mentioned recently that Torbs and I are in the market. We are trying to buy a house. Hot market. We are trying to buy a house. Hot market. Yep. We've been kind of looking and going to opens and stuff, which is like so tiring, eh? Like because you just fall in love with stuff and then you go,

well, we can't afford that and whatever. We actually – I'm going to like spoil this early. We went to an auction on Saturday. Yep. We didn't get the house, unfortunately. It was a real shame. It was nice. It was really nice.

It went way over what we expected. Can we say the suburb because I want to make the joke about Pippa? Yep. So it's the suburb of Reservoir. And I said BJ was jealous because Pippa will get to be a Reservoir dog. Reservoir dog. That was before we lost the auction. Although having said that i think

you should focus on reservoir the area because for the joke i just sound so cool it does as a reservoir dog oh how cool is that yeah it does sound good i mean get a place that you like yeah but if it happens to be there would be good um so we didn't get the house um we went through the roller coaster of emotions of being like, oh, my God. So the auction was on Saturday and we only found out that we could actually even bid at like 6 p.m. on the Friday. So there was a lot of emotions. It all kind of came together really quickly.

We were like, fuck, every sign is pointing to like we're going to get this home. How is Torbs' hand? Because I stood behind you during the bidding. So you came down. Yeah, moral support. We're in this together. Which was lovely. So it was Ryan, your wife Bridget, your baby Mabel,

and Bridget's mum and dad are in town at the moment. And so they came down. It was the whole family. It was actually amazing having like the family moral support there. It was really nice. I was standing behind you and Torbs, and I reckon I could see him sweating and getting pale because you were squeezing his hand

and you like squeezed the life out of him. I felt like a finger was going to pop. I know. And there was like a point where the guy, the auctioneer, like it was getting really close and then he went inside to like find out if they were like on the market. Yeah. So like the people that were selling decided like, yep, we finally got enough money.

And then it keeps kind of going. But he goes back inside and everyone kind of takes a bit of a breath at that point. I don't know if many people have been through an auction process. This was personally my first one. So anyway, and then we kind of all took a breath and I said, oh my God, Torbs, I'm really sorry. I think I've broken your hand. He was like, I actually think you might have. But then they came back out and we were back on now.

But the fact that he didn't mention it and he just took it, like Tony's having a moment, you need something to squeeze. But he was squeezing back as well. Like I will say both of us were fucking hanging on for dear life. But anyway, so it's like the night before we find out, yeah, it's like 6 p.m. that we can actually bid. It's so exciting but we're so nervous because we're thinking about all of this money and it ended up not even fucking being enough.

Do you know what? It was like really heartbreaking. Like everything's going over. There was just – anyway, it was really heartbreaking actually to not get it but that's okay. There will be another one. And we're sitting at home. It's 6 p.m.

And I go, ooh, all right. Do you want some dinner? And Tobs is like, no, no, no, no. I don't think I can eat anything. I was like, yeah, me either. I don't think I can eat anything. Yeah. So much nervous energy.

Pippa was like kind of running around because the nervous energy in the house was like very odd. I could be a reservoir dog in 15 hours. Yeah, she was excited. She'd packed her bag already. She had everything. Her toy box was full. Anyway, and it's really nervous energy.

We had like, we were supposed to cook dinner. We didn't cook any dinner. We ended up not eating anything. I ate a muesli bar at like midnight because I was like, I've got to fucking have something. But anyway, we go to bed. Neither of us get any fucking sleep we wake up in the morning uh we're like oh we'd set our alarm for like nine o'clock just in case when have you ever woken up past then on the weekend anyway um and we both woke up at like 6 30 we're like oh yeah is it too early to go yet

like we're just both so nervous and um and so the was open at 10.30 and there's like half an hour to kind of go and look at the property. And then the auction was at 11. And we'd gone and looked at this house about five times already to like go and do different inspections and everything and make sure we really wanted to spend the fucking money on it. So we'd seen the house quite a few times. But my friend Amy Lunardi, she does property stuff, and she was going to bid for us because I was like, well, there's just no way that I could handle that. You would collapse.

You would disintegrate and die on the spot. I would have just thrown up and died. Literally would have thrown up, hit the ground, been like, is that a bid? Does a vomit count as a bid? We will accept vomit. Do I hear 710? Do I hear 710 will accept vomit. Do I hear 7.10? Do I hear 7.10?

7.10. Do I hear 7.20? 7.30. 7.30. 7.30 on the other side. You and Tom's were bidding against each other. Like the episode of Family Guy when they have the ippocach and they're all throwing up on each other.

Who wants chowder? Anyway. So we were like, all right, if the house is open at 10.30, we should probably make sure that we're not late. We can't miss the auction. And it hits like 9 a.m. And both of us are showered and ready to go and like just sitting on the couch, like just waiting to leave.

And I was like, how about we go and we go, there's like this lovely cafe around the corner. I was like, what if we go, we'll have some breakfast, neither of us have eaten anything. We'll go and have a coffee, we'll have some breakfast, try and chill out beforehand and then we'll like go back to the house and be there for the inspection and for the auction. And just get moving.

There's no point sitting here getting nervous. Exactly. We're just sitting at home. And maybe meet the locals down at the cafe around the corner from the new house. We're about to move in, introduce Pippa to the regulars. So we wanted to get to the house, like, for 10.30, so leave the cafe at 25 past 10, just around the corner.

And we ended up getting there at like 9.30 because we just had nothing else to do. They were really busy. So we waited like five or 10 minutes for a table. And we've actually, this is not the first time I've been to this cafe. This girl, Piper, who is an avid tarper, I know that she'll be listening. Lovely girl. She works at this cafe. G'day, Piper. And Piper like kind be listening. Lovely girl. She works at this cafe.

G'day, Piper. And Piper kind of saw us come in. She goes, oh, my God. And because we'd seen her a couple of times, she was like, I know that you live in Richmond. What brings you to the area? And I was like, oh, we're actually like looking. We've become a reservoir doll. Yeah, like we've been looking at a house around the corner

and all of that. And so she kind of knew like why we were there. Anyway, and so we sat down and we both ordered a coffee and then we're looking at the menu they had like all this beautiful food on the menu and i was like i cannot stomach a whole meal i'm just gonna order a toasty talks goes i'm gonna order a toast as well so we both order a toast in a coffee the coffee's come over we're sitting there for like another 10-15 minutes or something and amy who's helping us out with the auction, she walks in. And she's like, oh, hey, guys, feeling like you're nervous?

And we're both like, oh, my God, we haven't slept. We haven't eaten. We're just like trying to keep this coffee down. We did order food, though, so hopefully we don't pass out. Ha, ha, ha. And she goes, great, cool. I might order a toasty as well. And she goes, I'll just order at the counter, though,

because you guys have already ordered. So she goes up to the counter, orders a toastyasty and it comes out in about five minutes yeah i mean it's it's toasted bread what could take so long yeah so her toasty comes straight out torbs and i our coffees came but our toasties never came where are the toasties and so it's kind of like it time's ticking on i'm really nervous about the auction i've got like my, my sister texting me being like, good luck, hope it goes well. And I'm like, I can't fucking deal with that. Amy's talking to us about like, you know,

what to do during the auction, just all this stuff. And we were actually quite confident we were going to get the house. We are. Quietly confident. It was false obviously in the end. So we're kind of sitting there and, like, swinging between being really nervous and then being like, we fucking got this in the bag. Like, we're going to get this.

Anyway, and then all of a sudden it's, like, 20 past 10, 25 past 10, and I'm like, the fucking toasties still haven't come. Amy's eaten her toasties. She's, like, ready to go because she needs to go and like get ready to bid at the auction for us. When hers rock up, did you not then go well hang on a second. Well I don't like to make a fuss. But I think

asking for something you paid for isn't a fuss. It's just asking for something you paid for. Well I just I was clock watching and I didn't want to complain and because Piper is a fan of the pod I wanted to like you know. Does she still work there now? Easy breezy. Don't.

Yes, she does. I hope so. Anyway. I don't know about that because it sounds like she's gotten a bit starstruck and forgot to do her job. No, no, no. So she didn't take our order. Likely for you to stick up for Piper.

Somebody else did. Sorry, Piper's my best friend and I won't have you hear a bad word against it. Missed the auction and the other half my brain apparently um anyway i'm watching the clock tick up the house is open at 10 30 it's now 10 35 so when it opens at 10 30 hasn't come i expected you to be there at 10 15 i get to the open that was the plan i get to the open house at 10 30 and i'm looking for your car and i can't find it. No. I walk around the house for a few minutes.

It looks beautiful. Start picturing you, Alex, and Pippa in there. Yep. And you're like, oh, yeah, and when I stay over, this will be where I am. Yeah, I'll be over there and we'll sit over here. Where will you put the treadmills? And then it gets to 10.35 and I go.

Something's wrong. Knowing you, something's wrong. Yep. Because Tony would have been here an hour ago. Yeah. Where's Tony? Is it on? Am I just in a's wrong. Yeah. Because Tony would have been here an hour ago. Yeah. Where's Tony? Is it on? Am I just in a random house?

Yeah. That she's not bidding for anymore? Like, what's going on? And so anyway, it gets to 10.35, 10.40, and I'm like, we need to leave. And Amy goes, yeah, we need to go. And then I'm like, fuck, I've got to go up to the counter and say, like, that I have to go. Anyway, so I go up there. Tell Piper we're past the point of picking up the produce.

Nice. Very good. So piss off, Piper. You piss poor peasant. She's a lovely girl. Sorry, Piper. Sorry, Piper. Anyway, so I go up to the counter and she goes, Tony, how was everything?

And I was like, oh, the coffee's- Define everything, Piper. I was like, the up to the counter and she goes, Tony, how was everything? And I was like, oh, the coffee's- Define everything, Piper. I was like, the coffee's were amazing. Thank you so much. She goes, oh, great. And then she kind of like looks at the screen. Yeah. Kind of looks at me and then goes, oh.

And I was like, yeah, we also ordered toasties, but they didn't come. And she goes, oh, my God, that table there, they ordered just before their foods just come out, so yours will be like two seconds away. And I was like, I actually need to go. She's like, no, no, no, it'll take two seconds. I'm like, yeah.

Like there was no negotiating on the time that I had to be at the other place. So an auction, I didn't realise, it's like when they say 11. Oh, bang. Yeah. Yeah, they ring this big bell and it's a whole thing. I assumed it would be like five or ten past oh everyone had a last little sneak peek and blah blah are we all good to go no it's a legal thing

like if it says 11 on the tin it's like no it's a contract it's a big sale it says 11 proceedings started 11 o'clock oh maybe because yeah there's no like oh we'll get there whenever 11 ish this is an auction babe This is the rest of my life. I want to be a reservoir dog. I'm not hanging out for a ham and cheese sandwich. Pretty much. And so then I felt really rude. Put that in your pipe and pipe smoke it.

Because I'm getting, like, more and more nervous. I'm, like, getting, like, I just couldn't come up with the words to explain why I had to go. Were you rude? No, no, no, I wasn't rude. But she was like, do you need a go? And I was like, yeah. Like, I could have literally, but she was like, do you need a go? And I was like, yeah. Like I could have literally just been like, yeah,

we're actually bidding on an auction. Like, babe, it's all good. We'll just go. I feel like if you say the A word, everyone goes, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Exactly. But I just, my brain was not clocked in and I just couldn't do it. Anyway, and then so I go, let me just pay for them, but you eat them. Or like give them to someone, but I'll pay for them because I'm obviously not going to like leave you in the lurch.

Doc, you're a pay piper. Because they weren't even ready for us to just like get us takeaway or anything. They were just – They said toasty. She's like, just put them in a bag and I'll be on my way. I think that maybe the order got lost or something. Yeah, it happens. It does, totally.

Anyway, and I was like, please just let me pay for them. Like it's all good. She was like, absolutely not. And I was like, just let me pay for them. Oh, my God. Oh, And she was like, absolutely not. And I was like, just let me pay for them. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Do you know what I mean? You said you would have thrown up if you were bidding.

I would have thrown up. Two nice girls trying to be the nice one. Exactly. Both of us are just trying to outkind the other one. And then she goes, okay, great. Just pay for the toasties. And then you go, you bitch making me pay for them. And I was like, thank fuck, Piper.

Shut up. I tap my card and we go on our way and then we don't get the house we get there in time thankfully

but we don't get the house it's a bit of a fucking slap in the face and then we get home we're feeling a bit sorry for ourselves and I was like

oh I need to I need to transfer money to someone and I check on the thing and she charged me $9.90 she didn't charge me for the toasties. But in that moment, she knew that she had to let me think that I was paying for them.

Otherwise, I wouldn't have left. And that's why I've always respected Piper. Isn't she good? And I've never said a bad word about her. Isn't she good? That is a good move. You need to let Tony think she's doing the right thing. But it was like such a great like energy gauge.

Like she knew that she just had to let me do it. She got you. She didn't. Obviously she didn't let me do it. But I was just like, can you just let me pay? I need to leave. And I can't put that into words right now. No, good on you, Piper.

And she goes, yep, all good. And I just tapped my card and fucking ran out because we were literally going to miss it. God bless Piper at the Jelly Brain Cafe. That's all I can say. In the devastation of missing the house. Yeah. Am I wrong in saying it got to like third and final call? They're about to almost touch down.

And then somebody else jumped in. Yeah. Like it was really touch and go. To put this in perspective, our top bid, it went for $1,000 more than we could afford. Yeah. Oh, but they could have kept going. Oh, no, totally. But we kind of tapped out and then they went $1,000 higher

and they won it. It was brutal. It was harsh. So what I was getting at is with that, and it was harsh and devastating. Yeah. So you go, fuck. Well, we've already paid for those toasties.

We should go back and collect them. We drown our sorrows in a ham and cheese around the corner. We've already paid for them. Let's go and pick them up. But imagine that. I go around the corner and I go, well, I've already paid for those. So here's the thing. Actually.

What a triple blow. No sandwich. She did you dirty and you didn't get the house. Pippa's not a reservoir dog. Well, the search continues. Maybe this is the title of the episode. Mr House by the ham and cheese sandwich or something. We can workshop that after.

Yeah, cool. Yeah, okay. You already know what we came up with, but at the time of recording, that's the best we've got apparently. That's the starting point. That's the starting point. It's not bad. Everything is like leading us to the right decision. How are your emotions right now? apparently that's the starting point that's the starting it's not bad everything is um like

leading us to the right decision how are your emotions right now because this you love to see it's heavy oh can i should i go first oh no you should go first so we can round it out fuck i'm mate i'm fresh off the i know i know but i think this might just give you some perspective in terms of oh i please understand i know that this is like first world issues. I know, but it just might make you go, oh, no. Yeah, okay. Hi, Tony and Ryan. This is Big Kev Collins.

Oh, hey, Big Kev. Oh, I'm excited. Yeah. Kev is from San Antonio, Texas, so he doesn't know that there's this famous Australian guy called Big Kev who used to sell cleaning products. Who says, I'm excited. It's Big Kev and I got a new sponge and I'm excited.

Yeah. So anyone in Australia knows that? I think he died. Yeah, he's dead. Oh, RIP. Not this Kev, other Kev. Oh. Big Kev Collins from San Antonio, Texas and his wife.

They had their third baby in mid-March. Third baby girl, three girls. Whoa. Surrounded by roses. Yep. Big Kev is? Our baby Frankie May. Oh, I've spoken to Big Kev about this.

Oh, yeah. Born, unfortunately, Frankie May was born with a heart defect that was undetected until after birth, which makes it tricky because sometimes you can plan for it and know what's going to happen. So we were discharged just like normal, like the other two girls, but they had to rush back into the emergency room the following morning because her breathing was going really quick. She wasn't eating.

And they later learned that she was going into sepsis and was actively dying. Awful. So sad. So a few hours after waiting in an ER, they found out about the heart defect. She's going to need multiple heart surgeries. So they spent the next few weeks, like, kind of not knowing.

What was going to happen. What was going to happen. Whether the baby girl, little Frankie, was going to survive. Multiple surgeries. And it was during this time that Big Kev Collins found the Tony and Ryan podcast and started listening to it. I will accept the term brain break in this circumstance. In all situations, we will accept it.

We will mega accept it in this one. I haven't listened to all the episodes yet, but I'm working my way through slowly and surely. I can't tell you how much listening to your podcast helped get me through those days in hospital. I can report. I've got breaking news from Kevin Collins. Frankie May, who's just turned 115 days old.

She's coming home, guys. She's coming home. Frankie. We're a whole family again, and she's finally hanging out with her two big sisters. There's a little bit of uncertainty about upcoming surgeries and how it's going to look, but we're enjoying this special time together. Don't you love to see that? And you have to celebrate

those wins, you know, as they come, which is like so important. We're so thankful for the many doctors and nurses who are miracle workers and took the best care of little Frankie. Thanks for the podcast and thanks to the legendary TARPA community who's been so supportive with distractions and lovely messages during

this dark time. You'll love to see it. Thanks, everyone. From Big Kev Collins. Oh, Kev, we love you. And we're sending lots of love to Lil Frankie as well. What a cute name, too. Yeah.

Frankie Mae. And it's M-A-E, I believe, if I'm not mistaken. It is. Yep. Beautiful. Thank you for sharing that, Ryan. And thank you for telling us about that, Big Kev. That's fucking special. Cool. Now tell us about your toasted cheese sandwich. No, no, no, that, Ryan. And thank you for telling us about that, Big Kev. That's fucking special. Cool.

Now tell us about your toasted cheese sandwich. No, no, no, no, no. I have a, you'll have to see it here from Natalie Zamet in our. Oh, the Big Zam Dog. Yeah, Big Zamo. Oh, do you remember Zappos, the candy? They're so good. I'll message you in our Patreon.

Hi, guys. I've got a love to see it for you. Fucking bring it on, Natto. I'm a year three teacher and I've recently noticed that I have some new vocabulary. I am constantly saying like, you know, when you're writing a report, you'd know this because your mum was a teacher. Writing reports, you've got to kind of get creative with that so that they don't all say the exact same thing. Tony is an insert blank here, student. Yeah, exactly.

And you can't go like keep it up for everyone You know So Nats realised that she's saying something a bit different In her report writing And she said for example Emily is doing such a great job at her writing You love to see it Thanks for the new saying

Says Natalie, Natalie you're fucking welcome And I love to see that I love to see that Natalie well done I do love to see that I love to see that. I love to see that, Natalie. Well done. Isn't that so sweet? I do love to see that. Oh, I love it when people share their you love to see it. In our Facebook group, if you look at Tony and Ryan podcast on Facebook, we have a pinned post and you can share all of your you love to see it's in there.

Or if you pop it through on Patreon, we'll get to see it and respond and stuff, which is real fun. All right. Tomorrow on the show, confessions are back. You can submit those at Tonyandandryan.com.au. Completely anonymous, by the way. Annoyingly anonymous. Annoyingly.

But they are anonymous and they're tomorrow, so we'll chat to you then. Love you. Bye.