Toni and Ryan - Ryan Pissing On A Bus

Episode Date: March 11, 2026

NORMAL or NAH - Peeing on the bus - Wet4Life brainstorm - love ya!!!!!https://tarpliverecordings.com/Sign up to Patreon Here - www.patreon.com/ToniandRyanFAQ and T&C's PODCASTAWAY - www.toniandryan.com.au/podcastawayVideo for this EP is available on YOUTUBECheck out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toniandryanpodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

So I'm on the bus and I need to piss. I'm in the back row of the bus. I've got a Sprite bottle. And so I went to like put the head in the bottle. And it wouldn't go in. Hi, I'm Gareth from Orlando in the United States. I'm Trudy and I'm currently living in beautiful Brisbane Australia. My name is Patrick from Victoria, Canada.

And I approve this podcast. Welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast. My name is Ryan. This is Dr. Arthur, Tony Lodge. Hi. This is a safe place where you can be. your silly self. If your boss says you have to be a professional, we don't.

You can take it back. Brain break. Take it right back. Brain break for 30 minutes. And I want to tell you about the nice people that work on this podcast. Oh yeah. I told Charles a story yesterday. And he nodded and he went, oh my God, that's crazy. And he was like, yeah, wow. Yeah. And then I've since learned that Tony had already told Charles that exact same story. the day earlier and Charles said but you look so excited

to tell me I thought I'll just let you have that one Bees and I just you know that says a lot about a human Yeah it was And because it was kind of

Not that important Was what No no no but like Fucking out Can a guy tell a story About a thing that happened With Tony Yeah but like

Because it was just like A in passing kind of thing It was a terrible story And just because I hate you No no no not about I told it too. I don't think it's a bad story. Thank you.

But it was kind of just like a inconsequential like anecdote. Yeah. So I think that it's, but it was, you know. And Charles said you look so excited. I thought I'll just let you have that one. And thank you.

Next step is to don't let me find out that Tony's told you. But that wasn't on you. That was on me. That's on me. Because I said Tony, I told Charles about a thing. And Tony goes, yeah,

I told him yesterday. And I went, oh. I said it, I tried to, I said it in a way, like not in a cutty downy way. I said it like,

oh, I was saying a Charles. And then I just see Charles going. And then Charles goes, I didn't tell Ryan yesterday that he did. Yeah. I've been caught out. But I just appreciate.

And I think we should all appreciate the people in our lives. And you, how many times have I told you the same story over the journey? I love it. And you just go, wow. Love it. Who could have guessed that ending? Probably me because you told me yesterday,

but so amazing. Dad's naming boats. It's all good stuff. Crazy. Yeah. I've got some normal on ours. Thank you so much for submitting. them Tony and Ryan.com.com or in the Facebook group.

I believe we now own Tony and Ryan.com as well. Do we? We do. It redirects to Tonyerion.com. Is it too late to change our email addresses? Yeah, I think it will be. I forget the dot a you all the time. The amount of stuff I haven't gotten through to me because I haven't given them a dot

AU. Sounds like you need a business card. Okay. Does that mean that if you go to the post office? I go, what email? I just go, Yeah, but don't look like a cockhead like that when you do it. How do you give a business card in a non-cock way?

I don't think you can. Is there a way? I don't think so. Is it a bit like a Bluetooth headset? Yes. Is a business card the way to detect a fuckhead from range? Yeah. Even more so if they've got like a metal container.

The business card holder. And they go, whishing. Yeah. And then pull it out. Although my favorite scene in cinematic. history is in American Psycho when they compare business cards. Oh, I don't remember. I've only seen it the once when we watched it for the pod.

I liked it, but I don't remember it. An iconic scene. Yeah, right. And because the joke is they're all fucking white and just says their name on it. Yeah. But it's like, oh, he got the bone with the matted pleat of the thing. Oh, yeah. Oh, the embossed.

Yeah. And they're just like, what do you guys do all? Yeah. Yeah. And like, he's really mad that someone like thought the other guy's card was better than his. And it was just like a real. why he kills them. Tony Lodge.

American nice guy. We are actually in American Psycho Month on our Tony and Ryan calendar for 2026. I didn't know where that sentence was going. I didn't know where that sentence was going. But it ended pretty good. It did. That does look good.

I like it. Because I forgot about it. And then someone tagged me and I was like, have I been stabbed in the face? Yeah. What happened then? No. I was dressed like Patrick Bateman from American Psycho.

Yeah. Tapa. Kaylin Green has a normal owner. What type of Kalyn Green? After I binge true crime or medical rescues or paranormal shows, I need a pallet cleanser before I can go to sleep. Yep. We're talking an episode of Bluey or a YouTube video.

Like I just go to YouTube and type in patting dogs. Yep. Say what comes up. Yep. If I don't have that reset of a vibe before bed, the dark energy comes with me into the bedroom. 1,000, I completely agree. Yes, normal.

I get it. Absolutely. The dark energy following you into the bedroom, very visual, very good. My palate cleansers of choice are normally the Office US or Modern Family. Yep, just pop it on. It has to be something I've seen a billion times. I know exactly what's coming. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But I've never heard the term palate cleanse in a watching video sense. But it is exactly what it is. It's the saw bay. The Office US is the sore bay of foods.

wait the office us is the saw bay of TV shows thank you the office US is the saw bay of modern media oh put that on my fucking business card

is our podcast the saw bay to your day oh I've got come on me maybe not add some sore bay to your day

what is the best Pallet Cleansing. So I know we've talked about this a lot recently, but if you have to choose one flavor, because I know what mine is now. That green apple one you used to be able to get from Wendy's. I've talked about it before. It fucks.

It's so good. I think there's something, because the point of the palate cleanse, the crispness of a passion fruit, you don't have to be acidic and it just, I'll take that. Clean your ride out. Palate-wise.

Is it a bit tangy? Is it a passion fruit tangy? Yeah, but it's a different kind of tangy. bitey tart. It's an aesthetic a sithet a thp puff

fruit my face stopped working it honestly was slow motion tart what you call me was a tart like yes

the sore bay of your day listen to Tony and Ryan I like that grab a spoon it's Tony and Ryan oh maybe not that's that didn't

there's not a connection there's weird grab a spoon it's Tony and Ryan I don't hate that but it doesn't really mean anything there's someone like on the train home from work listening to the show just holding the spoon up no sorry I'm just having my pallet cleanser just having the sore bay to my day yeah excuse me man why are holding that spoon I'm actually having the saw bay to my day pallet cleanse your brain nah that's like a lobotomy gruesome yeah it sounds like a scene from the movie sore or what's that other one that I

tried to watch every day for three years and never got around to it shut out island That's worth a watch. That's a great film. It's a good movie. Take your spoon for that one. Oh, spoon required. Yeah.

I've watched the last scene on TikTok maybe 300 times and I still don't get what he says. Yeah. Yeah. You know that line? Yeah. And you go, I think I know that something's happening here. But it's open to interpretation. But apparently it's not.

Nah, I don't think it is. But I don't. That's okay. It's open for me. I am open for it to be interpreted. It's a beautiful way to leave life, I feel. But yeah, I think you can't bring the darkness into the bedroom. So true.

I agree with that. Charles likes bringing the darkness into the bedroom. Wow. Don't you, Charles? Reserving a seat for someone on a packed city train in peak hour. Tarpur Grace asks, is this normal or nah? It's 5.15 p.m. at Central Station in Sydney. One seat left on the whole fucking train for my 50-minute train ride home.

And this fuckwit with a goatee says, sorry, I'm saving this for someone. Nah, nah, you can't be doing that. It all happened so quickly. I hate that my instinct was to go, oh, okay, sorry. But then seven seconds later, I was like, it's a public fucking train. You can't reserve a seat for someone, you, is this normal or nah? The reaction is just exquisite from our Tapa. Grace, of which she had too much.

Yes, I think you can't be doing that. It's the same as like standing in a parking spot. I don't think that's fair game. Doesn't that in it? Like you can't be doing that, eh? In a busy Woolworth and there's just like some guy standing over the shopping bag? It's at the beach you see it, eh? And you go, oh, my family's,

coming in another car. I go too bad. Like, tell him to catch the bus. I think I've got a new power move. What is it? So, you know how we always attempt

a poor man's business class? Yeah, we do. Failed two out of two. Two out of two. Sydney is you get, Tony gets the window, I get the aisle and we leave the middle one.

And we just hope for the bit and we sit right at the back as well. So it's often the last one. The chances are high, but on a plane on a plane that we were on, there were heaps of seats at the front available, windows and aisles, and this person sat between us at the back.

And he was a fidgeter. He was a fidgeter. He moved the whole time. So here's my power play. Say we're trying to pull the same move on the train. Say we're getting to the 721 from Eltham to go to the city for our day at work. Hurst Bridge line. Not well.

Shout up. We go like, have a game. gap between us and then as we go from Eltham into town it starts to get busier and we go oh no we've saved this for someone and we just ride poor man's business class the whole way into Flinders street I think it's two seats I don't think it's three I know you haven't been on a train in probably many many years it's like two seats at a time it's not three seats isn't one side of there's threes and there's twos no it's a row you can sit three on a whole row no it's normally two two two two what line are you on

Munder? What are they doing over there? I'm pretty sure. Thank you, Danielle. It's two, twos, twos. The Mender line is

different things. Get their fucking act together. On Menda, it's all like, it batches of two. Well, that wouldn't work at all. No.

How far. But it's the same as like putting your bag on the seat. Like, get over it. Yeah. You're on the train. If, okay,

you say, yeah, those are like the Sydney trains. Oh, that's in Sydney. No, they're in, On the Munderline, at the very least, it's 2-2.

How many stops, say we get on an Eltham and someone goes, can I sit there and we go, sorry it's reserved. One. It's got to be the next stop. Then we get to Montmorency. No one gets on. Then we get to Green'sboro. No one gets on.

Is that person in there right to go, so is your friend coming or? No. I think it's got to be they're getting off at the next step. We get to Clifton Hill and they go, are you sure? Or say me and you, you and I were on the train and like Charles is meeting us. the next stop i feel like it's just it is what it is yeah like i don't think you i don't think you can if you want to book a sea then pay for fucking quantus if you want to book a sea get british airways get on the v line oh you can you book a sign no you can't i love the passion in your voice though

yeah and then i knew it was called the v line that's that is great yeah where does the v line go the country train yeah where could we catch the v line too because that sounds fun across station we start and then we could go to ballarat We could go to Bendigo, we go to Geelong. We could get to Phillip Island fire bus. No, like it takes you out to a bit and then they fuck you off and put you on a bus. Nah, I'm not doing the bus. Because we used to drink on that and go to parties in Phillip Island.

And then remember that time when I said I'd have to pee on the bus and the guy wouldn't pull over? That was the V-line mission. I don't think I have heard that story. So, all right. So there's this party in Grantville, Grand VA, as it were. Oh, yeah. Which is down towards Phillip Island. Yeah.

So we're having a few drinks in town And we go, great, there's a big party going on It takes an hour and a half to get there But let's, you know, we'll grab a six pack For the trip down, you know? Yep. You're not allowed to do that, eh? Yeah, but this was back in the day, so.

Yeah, in the 70s, I feel like. Yeah, when I was a youngster. Different, different hero. It was a different time. And then... Charles was literally not even born when you're talking about doing this. Yeah. His parents weren't born.

So I'm on the bus and I need to piss. Yeah, you always do. I imagine especially. But like I've been drinking. Yeah. That's what I mean. I am full of piss. Yeah.

And I was like I do. And because it's like we're going to fill a pile. It's not like as a stop every three minutes. It's like we're in a lot. And I, and I didn't really know what the protocol was. So I kind of like wobbled down to the front to the driver. And it was like,

it was like, it was like, hey bro, can you just pull it? Like I got to fucking piss myself. Like can you pull it? Is there, is it a coach? Like there is there toilets on the thing? Right.

Yeah. Yeah. He just goes, oh, mate, we can't be stopping for everyone, you know, every time someone needs to piss. And I was just like, well, you don't have to. You just stop for me. Yeah, fuck the hell, guys. I've got a solution. Yeah.

And I know a few boys back there that if we did stop, that'd probably take the opportunity. That'd all do it, yeah. And so he goes, sorry, we're stopping in fucking somewhere in 20 minutes. And I went, okay. That's your worst nightmare. Yeah. Because that's when you start to get a bit claustrophobic and like, I don't mind if I know the time, though. that can help in some situations.

Sure. Because you go, okay, when it's like, who knows, you're like, what? Yeah, okay. But at this point, I'm like, there is no chance in hell I'm going to last 20 minutes without pissing myself. So I'm in the back row of the bus. And I've got a Sprite bottle because... 1.25?

No, 600 mil. And can I just say that... You need a vitamin water, bigger mouth. A bigger mouth, like a Gatorade bottle. but the sprite is a thin mouth. It is a thin mouth. It is maybe the thinest. Yeah.

And so I went to like put the head in the bottle. And it wouldn't go in. Well, no. So I was like, well, if I put it up. If it did, you'd be like, oh. Yeah, I wouldn't say it out on the podcast. Yeah. And I ended like, if I can't get it in, no one.

So I'm like, well, maybe I'll try and put it like on and just like, and I was like, well, that's not going to work. So in the back of the back of the. the seat. I am so physically upset by this. So in the back of the seat in front of me, because it's like a regional bust, there's like a map,

you know, like on a plane, like here's the emergency thing and here's a map. And you made a funnel. Yeah. Have I told you this before? No. Yeah,

because the map's kind of got like a laminated plasticy feel to it. And so I was like, oh, I'll make a funnel out of that. And so I kind of, you know, wrapped it up and put that into the top of the Sprite, bottle. And now here's something that I don't teach you in school. If you've had four beers,

a 600 mil sprite bottle isn't enough. Not going to cut it. And here's what else are they and tell you. Once you've pissed about 557 mils worth of piss, you are not in the mood to stop. Because once you start, you need a, yeah. So I'm in the back row and I'm leaning forward to try and, you know, get this. To slow down. Well, I'm sort of like to get it in the bottle and the thing. With the boys like around you? Yeah, but the person sitting in front of me was Hannah Chatharne. And I see her like every, every now and then down the street. And so my face is like almost like a nuzzled here because she's sitting facing and she's like, what are you doing?

And I was like, don't turn around. So what are you doing? And I was like, I'm just leaning forward to try and pissing this bottle. She's like, are you fucking joking? Like you. Did it stink? Yeah. And anyway, so.

So I can feel the bottle filling up. And the thing with the Sprite bottle. And the audio starts to change. Yeah, the different sound. Yeah. But then also holding the bottle, you can feel the warmth. So then I do a big like, and like stop and then like tied the bottle on. And then I was like, there's more coming.

And I just pissed on the floor. Just a little bit, like the last little bit. And Hannah goes, is that? And I go, yeah. And I'm so sorry. I just had, and you got just you fucking shut the fuck out. And I was like, okay. And then.

What people don't know is that a bus is slightly slanted back towards the front of it. Like when you walk up to the back of a bus, you're sort of walking uphill. So then the last little bit just like trickled down the aisle. Like it was getting married. Yeah. I also think I dropped the bottle on that just like rolled to the front. And then I think we get to some smooth. small town and he pulls over and goes, oh, two minutes stop everyone.

Mate, this is you and I went, I'm all good thanks. And he goes, what? And I went, oh, yeah, hang on. And then I just like went and like, you probably had more in the tank by then. Yeah, but I was like, even if I just stand up the pitch tray from me and I was going to like, go through it. Yeah, theater. Yeah, theater. Acting.

Theater. So, um, that. Shout out to the McNeices for having a great party. Grand VA? What about the McNefews? They get that long. I don't like it. Um, that's crazy.

How do you... And I say Hannah all the time. Bridge goes, how do you know her and a guy I pissed on on her bus once? Did you fuck her after? You did. No, no.

You argued Lauren on a plane and fucked Hannah on a bus. No, absolutely not. And I'll tell you, even if I was, was a chance after that. No, thank you. Yeah, I don't think I could have sex with someone who I'd just watch piss in a spite bottle and then onto the floor of a bus through a train map. Yeah.

And I've always... Hannah isn't a very good looking lady. And if you had your pick of the litter as a good looking lady, you're going to pick the guy that just pissed on your feet? Absolutely not. No, bottom of the list. Like, even if it was Chris Hemsworth. No.

Like, I'm just going, no, babe. Not this time. Yeah, you know? Yeah. Like, if I, no. I just picked the first, like, Hanswurst. some, and like, I've never, I, but I, I just thought, yeah, that's like not my style. No, because you like a bad boy with tats and he's a clean skin weird guy.

Hey, I think he'd be cool. Like he's an Aussie, but like, not my type. No. Too much of a clean skin. But then I'm now I'm thinking like, if I saw young blood pissing, I would still do it. You'd be like, why are you pissing into them and you could. Piss into me? That's not how that works.

I stopped talking as soon as I saw it. Yeah, but thanks for completing it, though, so. So normal on Ars. Do you have another normal on now? Do we want another one? Should we move on? If you'd like to see us in Riga, more great stories like that coming up.

We're also in Stockholm and Dublin. If you go to tarp live recording.com. And before I go down the aisle, just like Ryan's piss, we're going to have a hens party in London. So if you want to come to that, Tony's henth party.com. At the Troxy Theatre,

if I like pissed near the doors, would that kind of like trickle down towards the front of the stage? It would. Okay. I don't think you should, though. That's just some advice from a friend. I'm not going to tell you how to leave you life. Advice is free.

Take it or leave it. All good. Great. Yeah. See in a minute. Hi, I'm Gareth from Orlando in the United States. I'm Trudy and I'm currently living in beautiful Brisbane, Australia. Hi, my name is Patrick from Victoria Canada. And you're listening to Tony and Ryan.

A massive shoutout. I'm trying to move on here. Massive shout out to a few of our champion tarpas over at our Patreon. Gracia Burke, good on you, Gracia. Ping Lee, thanks Ping. Christy Pushkar. Australia's fourth graders, electronic treetail. It's L-I, not L-E.

Yeah, sorry. Christy Pushka, good on you, Christi, Drusana, Jenna Buck, good on you, Jenna. Kelsey Upchurch, put it up something. Rachel Carleen, good on. Rachel. Claudia S. Claudia is a beautiful name.

It really is, isn't it? Like, because would you go are Claude's? Hey, Claude. Or is that, nah. Claudia is so pretty. Cloud, Claude. Claude. Claude Lodge.

Claude Lodge. Claude Lodge. Yeah, thank you. Riley, Sarah. When you married Torbs, does he become a lord? I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know what I'm going to do about. my last name yet. Oh yeah. I haven't really... Which way are you leaning? I think that I'll always be Tony Lodge. You'll always be Tony Lodge. Because of work and stuff.

Yeah. But I can't decide whether to change it to like towards his last name or whether to just like, it's a lot of admin. But I don't really have any connection to my last name. So it's like, although my mum was like a lodge. But yeah, you know, so I don't really don't know what to do. A new name, a new era. I would love to be

that have the same last name as Torbs because that just feels really lovely could you guys just pick a random new fun name yeah we start from scratch be the monarch of the fucking whatever's and what would that be so I've watched a lot of Bridgetton recently yeah that was really yeah you saying monarch was crazy

because the new seasons came out so oh real I've never watched it neither until I'm not a big fan of like period they're so shit just So Bridgett watches all of them. I just find it so fucking dumb. And I go, I thought the guy died and she goes, that's in the other show.

And I'm like, aren't they all the fucking, Did you know Bridgeton? And Staten Abbey? And downtown Abbey aren't the same show. Did you know that? I actually thought they were linked. But is that dumb? And Bold and the Beautiful.

Nothing to do with it. No. That's young and the restless. No. Yeah. Crazy. Not the same. No.

No. Um, yes, I don't know about the last name. Oh, yeah. That's where we were. That's where we were because you said, could I be a monarch. Yeah. Yeah. You could be a monarch.

Well, could I just become a done? You're welcome. What if Torbs and I just both become a done? Donnie. We'll have you. Yeah. Or a Johnston? You guys should be a Johnson.

We could be a Johnson. The Johnson's reached the end of its era. Yeah. And we could be like living that on. That, what an honour. I did think about taking, changing my last name to my mum's maiden name. Oh, okay. I did think that.

That's a nice touch, maybe. Which is Mallor. Malor. Malor. M-E-L-L-O-R. Like the glasses. That's M-L-U-R, but yes, very close, yeah. So I did think about that.

But that feels like maybe just too far, like a step too far away from like. Oh, but Johnson's fine. You're my best friend. Yeah. My mom, I guess. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, Diego Escalante, that Escalante.

Matthew Roberts, good on you, Matthew. Robo. But Brie Abbott. Good on you. Thank you very much. Thanks, Bree. Now, I want to turn, I was about to say turn gears. Change gears here a little bit.

We've just talked about pissing on a bus. This is a little bit different. Great. What a relief. I think. Just like that piss I took on a bus. Yeah. It was a relief.

It's a lot of piss. Yeah. Like, what do you reckon it ended up being 850? Couldn't be less than 900. Well, 600 is the bottle. Still a fair bit after that. Yeah. Did you have piss on your clothes and stuff?

Don't think so. That's good. Anyway, shift gears a little bit. Now, I don't have, I want to preface this by saying I don't have an answer. Okay. But I need an answer. And I think that this is a great opportunity for a bit of a live brainstorm. Okay.

Do you think we could create a new swimming stroke? Okay, so freestyle? Yeah, classic. Backstroke, classic. Great for survival. Well, there's survival stroke as well, which is actually... Oh, isn't there survival backstroke, which is a... It's different though, isn't it?

Yeah, because survival stroke is supposed to be the lowest output, so you can do it for the long... Backstroke, and you don't know where you go. Fresh stroke's a bit of a fucking miss for me. I never really understood it. I agree. I can't do it. I agree. Ms. Horton kept me in level four for a bit because of fucking breaststroke,

and I'll never forget it. And I'll never forget her. What a bitch. She was a bitch. And Butterfly is a superior iconic stroke. Butterfly, I've never even attempted it properly, I don't think. Like, aside from like, you know, but I would never go to the pool and do fucking butterfly.

Why not? What a jerk off? What wanker is at the narc doing butterfly? So when I was in... Charles probably. When I was in high school, you'd have the Altham High meet. And then if you win that, you go to district and regionals or whatever. So I got to regional doing butterfly.

Really? Is it because no one else wanted to do it? I feel like in district there was me and then one other guy and the top two got through. Yeah. One who it'll be. Yeah, Ryan and Jared Scannell. So I spent a lot of time at the public pool. Yeah.

Any butter, any butterfly? Well, I've never seen anyone do it. You haven't been swimming with me. Yeah. Well, you know, you have a hundred times. Lots of times. What are you thinking? Where are you at?

Like, is there an area you want to... Well, so yesterday, you talked about taking maibs to swimming lessons. I've been, I've taken my nephews a few times to swimming lessons. So you've said I've taken my daughter and talked about taking your French bulldog Pippa to the Nark. She doesn't like the water. Yeah, I was going to like the water. But I've taken my nephews a couple of times to their swimming lessons because same, they go on a Saturday morning and you kind of just sit there and watch them and like it's lovely.

Yep. And I was sitting there and I thought there's got to be more swimming styles out there. There's got to be. Like the same way like have all the songs been written, you know, is are we, have we reached the end? And then another banger comes out and you go, fuck, they've done it again. They've done it. So are you pitching like socially or are we saying like in the 12?

28 Olympic Games, maybe there's room for a doggy paddle. Well, but a doggy paddle is already a thing. Is there a stroke of like a swimming style that hasn't been done yet that we could, you know, create? Because when you think about it, there really is only what, four or five? That's not enough. That doesn't feel like that many a. Like what else could we?

Do you pick up what I'm putting? down. I do. I do. Obviously, swimming lessons very interesting. Well, keeping the brain on your phone. Well, no, because they're like teaching. Okay, so this is exactly where my mind went, right? They're doing the, because you've got to do the breaststroke kick before you're allowed to bring the arms in. That's like how they teach it. Wow. Yeah. They're strict. Because it, no, because it's like they break it down because it's hard to learn. Yeah, gotcha. Yep. Not that they're strict. It's that like, so you do. Would we use those

Before you're certified for those legs, bud. So you do it on a kickboard and you just get the legs right. And then they bring the arms in. Press stroke just fucking sucks. It's slow. It is nice though. If I'm getting a bit puffed, I do that for a bit,

just for a bit of a break. Yeah. But I'm watching them teach these kids breaststroke, right? And they're like, yep, so the way that it works is blood. And I go, well, who let you fucking decide that we were going to keep doing breaststroke? Yeah. Is there more? There must be more to life than breaststroke.

There's got to be more to life than breaststroke. Who sings that song? There's going to be more to live than breaststroke. That's not the one. Can you type in More to Life? I feel like it's not Mandy Moore, but it's Mandy Moore energy. Stacey. Stacey Erico?

Yeah. I actually don't know that song, but you know the other Stacey Erico song? What was her big one? You're thinking about sweet about me. No, that's Gabrielle Chilmy. more to life what was the Jesus Christ

who knew she had more than two son but she had just one real big one that I remember yeah play more to life you'll know it is that what I'm thinking I know we're going to get banned from YouTube for a second but I'm fine with it

oh fucking we'll watch your ad Stace that's right mate this song on Stacey Orico's Spotify it's the top one on her Spotify how many listens do you reckon it's hard

The top song on Stacey O'Riko Spotify Yeah Has had 700 million listens Okay 55, just under 56 million streams That's a lot, I What is it?

Oh, it's that song. Really? Yeah, yeah, that's her top one. 657,000 monthly listeners But there does have to be more to live than breaststroke. Thanks Stacy for being part of her Well let's us break it down Tony Lodge

What would you like What would you like to do with a leg You know let's go bit by bit What are we doing here We break it down Love it What are your hips doing You know

Besides not lying I'm on the hipster Is the stroke called Shakira We've had all the ladies We've had all the ladies All the early 20 Charles All the early 2000s ladies

What was that laugh he just did? He hasn't heard of a single person have mentioned. Have you never heard of Shakira? No, I've heard of Shakira. TLC? No.

Don't go chasing waterfalls. That's TLC. Please stick to the rivers and the lakes that she used to. I know that you're gonna have of your way

on nothing at all but I think you're moving too fast. And no scrubs, that's TLC. Oh, okay. Oh. Instead of the breaststroke doing that kind of wide frog thing.

Yeah. Can we just get like a seal? So a clap of the hands. No, a feet. I want seal feet. So the legs are doing maybe like. They're doing in and out. From a wire to an eye.

From a wire to an eye. Kind of thing. And the arms are still doing the breaststroke around into the chest and snap back out to the front. That's how they do it. It just makes no sense. I just, I don't hate the in and out. I don't know you'd move that fast. Well, that's where we've got to nail these arms.

It's so true. Yeah, yeah, get on the upper body. The other thing that I like about freestyle is that you move quickly, but is there something we could do to freestyle that it was like, shoo, shoo, shoo, shoo, shoo, shoo, shoo, shoo, shoo, shoo shoo shoo

so it's like an individual medley within the stroke within the stroke so you got your shoo shoo shoo which is your left and right freestyle and then your is your breasty

just for one I tell you what I'm also open to yep the Olympics don't tell you what to do they just say you got to get up touch that wall and get back and you do whatever the fuck you want it is quite literally freestyle

Yeah. Rock the microphone. Yeah, don't tell me. Straight from the top of my don't. Rock and rock rock rock. Don't tell me it's... Freestyleer. In fact, don't...

Rock the microphone. Boobob. Here are you. Rick the freestyle. Bo-pah. You know when they play that song a lot? You know when they play that song a lot? Your house?

at like the Royal Show Like when you go on a ride at the Royal Show They play that song heaps Um Surprisingly I've put on a week or so on Facebook Like My daughter's getting out of kids music

And I love it Yep And multiple people said Bom funk MCs Fuck yeah Rucker Rack a moment What other songs did they have Do they have anything else?

No. No. No. I mean, once you've struck gold. Can't be perfection. Like, what, um, is that guy of the headphones doing now? Because wasn't that a great video clip?

Who? LMFA. No, the guy in the, it could be him actually. Red foo. In the video clip of Rucker Rucker Rola. I've never seen the video. Bro.

No. Get the fuck out. Yeah, I know. It's just the sickest guy ever with sick dreadies. Could be LMFAO. And he's got mad headphones and he's just like walking around a train station listening to it. Cool. And it was like iconic.

Should we remake it? Actually, yes. Let's remake the Bomb Funk MC's rock the microphone video. What's that? Freestyleer. And here's the two things I've learned today. Yep. One, we will be recreating that video clip and can someone my age, please back me up that that was like...

The headphone guy? So iconic of a... Yeah, amazing. Two, don't tell me to do freestyle and then have rules how I can swim. I don't think you know what fucking freestyle means. If the bomb funk MCs did that, we wouldn't have that hit song. Sorry. Song.

I didn't realize song was spelt with a K on the end. Yeah, sorry, that was interesting. Now, my favorite song from that era is, my mistake, you see a Ricoc with that song. What was that album? The album. Sorry, my fucking brain stopped working. Put your recommendations in for two things.

What is our new stroke? Yeah. And would you like to be in the video clip of Bonfong MCS? Because we're going to film it at the Hurst Bridge. Nah, Southern Cross Station. We need escalators. And I'll let you know, sweetheart. Hurst Bridge don't have them.

Okay. Yeah. First bridge has an umbrella if it's raining. And go fucking that. So we're going to film it at the Southern Cross. station. Yep. On the escalate.

Yes, Charles? Could we film in a cellar cross station? Also filmed it in one of the Riga stations and one of the Stockholm stations. So we can claim the trip on tax. Great idea. Right to the bonk of my bonk. Well done. I'm never going to leave that down eight sunk.

Fuck, what a dummy. Anyway, I reckon there's legs to that. Raca, rocker, mom. Raca rach a mole. That's what they say. isn't it?

Rock the microphone. Oh, and song was the worst thing. You thought for 30 years that they said rock a rock a roll. They do. They say rock the microphone. I don't think they do. Charles, play it right now. It's cool.

That's not the guy. Oh. And they put the slide guitar. Brown. Oh. Here is. Charles, have you ever heard this song before? No, I've never heard this song.

It starts, like, it builds up. I didn't realize how young that kid was. Obviously, he was older than me when I first saw it. Yeah. So in your mind, you're like, he's 20. He's 25. He's like 16, 14, 15. We also can't play this audio at all, really.

That's okay. Rock the microphone. I'll go back. Watch him, though. Rocka, rock the wrong. It's rock the microphone. I don't think so. I love that.

Okay, so. You haven't just heard what we've heard. We have confirmed that it is rock the microphone. And the headphone kid is very cool. We can't play the audio. One of us has the songs we listen to them. One of us has said it's rock the microphone. If I can't have sunk, rocker, rocker, rocker wrong.

I will rocker, rocker rocker wrong wherever I rocker, rocker rocker wrong if you want to. Rock a wrong around the world. Okay. The brainstorm has gone. not where I expected. Better for better or worse? No, but I think a brainstorm can go anywhere. That's the thing.

It's a storm. You don't know what's going to happen. A storm of the brain. But I do really feel passionate about my new swimming style idea. I think it's, I think it's there's something in it. Can I set you a challenge? And then if people say like, oh, what are you doing? And you go, I'm doing the, I'm doing the tapestry stroke.

Tarpa stroke. Or maybe not. Tapas style. I'm the tapiriler. Rock the macum roll. Rock the rocker rock a rock. Okay, so you're swimming at the NAC couple of times a week. Next time you go swimming, sometimes, let me teach us about the creative process.

Sometimes you need to be a method actor like Donut Daddy. Yes. And sometimes we can sit here on chairs and discuss the body's movements in water. But I think we need to be in water. We need to be in water. We need to throw an elbow and see where that lands. We need to shake an ankle and see if it propels us forward. We need to feel the water and then.

let the stroke choose itself once we are in the water. Couldn't have said it better myself. I do have one more thought about a movement that I would like to explore, and that's with the arms in a diamond and then pumping their elbows like so. I... And a kick behind. I think what I described with the seal foot and your arm move would go together because they would go as one.

Yeah. Or would you do them offbeat? Like, legs, arms, legs, arms, legs. legs, arms, yeah. Rock the rock around. I think we can workshop it. But I reckon that we can come up with the type of style. All I can think, whilst I agree with you, I'm just so.

I'm so proud of my idea. Yeah, no, and I am too, but I'm so excited to recreate the bomb funk MCs video clip. In four months when we are back in Melbourne. What do you got something on? What are you got on the next few months? Yeah, no, you know what's so true. Sorry for being. I know man

No I don't have anything on except for my clothes oh and you can change that um where are we up to yeah I was like are we done no oh this is like sad and beautiful

but beautiful and sad okay so we like to end every episode whether you love to see it whether it's like a feel good story or a recommendation or something and it's just to like end us on a good note for the week the love to see it is really

like this one's specifically is the energy of like, I'm not judging where you're at. I'm not judging where you've been. I'm just here to celebrate you. Love it. From wherever you are. Love it. And Kelsey Tattoos, who's south of Kansas City.

Oh yeah. Hi, Kelsey. Shares this story and shout out to her because what a good bit she is. A woman walked into my shop and said, I want the number 392 on my wrist, please. Simple, black, small writing. Yep. Sorry, when you said the number 392, you know, when you go to a restaurant sometimes and like... Can I get the 392?

Yeah, and I was like, oh, what's that? But physically three, nine two. Yep, got you. And you kind of say that person was a bit distressed. Oh, like it meant a lot to them. Yeah. Sort of didn't want to pry. It was, oh, you know, like it must be an important number.

And the lady getting tattooed said, that's the amount of days my daughter stayed, cleaned for before she overdosed unfortunately and she said like everyone kind of remembers that like she didn't make it and feels like she failed but I remember that for 392 days

she did fucking make it yeah and she tried her fucking best and I want to remember the 392 where she was on a hot fucking street yeah and not the one you know not the one yeah um and so then because they make a stencil I don't quite know how well but she goes oh if you keep these stencils like can you just keep it here just you know and then so Kelsey the tattoo person kind of looks

into this a little bit and she kind of go oh this is like a thing for people who are you know how many days how many hours like it's an important thing and so now she said like anyone who wants to come in and get a number whatever that means to them it's on the house you just come in no questions asked and it's sort of become a bit of a thing in the community where people, you know, someone's come in and got a thousand. One guy himself is sort of going through it and he came in and got 30 and he said, I'm coming back in another 30 from a 60. And it's like, it's this free tattoo that is keeping his street going.

And that's because you've just got something that you're working towards. Yeah. And he goes, and coming in next month. That milestone. Yeah. And so just because she asked and was really like empathetic to this lady. and has sort of opened the doors and said, you need a number, you just guys, you just come in.

And now like people sharing their stories, they're checking the number, they're asking, oh, what's that number? Who's the, oh, it's for my son. Tell me about him, you know? So, like I said, some unfortunate stories, but just seeing what she's doing and helping people out and not judging and celebrating the good bits,

just what a good bit she is. I know that it was kind of a, maybe a bit of a, not a throwaway comment, but it's a small part of the story. but the sentence of like, I don't want to remember the one. Yeah. Is, like, has really hit, eh? Because often the one time we fuck up is the time you,

but you don't remember the 392 days that meant so much. And that some of them were probably a lot longer than others where it felt really tough. Yeah. That's over a year. Like, that's a long fucking time. Yep. So that's why I love to see. And there's a long post on her thing and I was sort of reading it all.

I was just like, fuck, dude. Well, Kelsey, thank you. you for sharing that as well and for doing what you're doing for the community that really needs that and that milestone is what like we said going to keep people going absolutely fuck that's awesome i love that um tony lodge well um it's hard it's hard to follow that yeah no it is hard to follow that but um i've got a recommendation for people for over the weekend um i watched this show on netflix it's called his and hers and um Danny on our team watched it by accident because she thought it was all her fault.

You remember when we fucking gassed up the Sarah Snook show all her fault? Danny goes, oh my God, how good was it? Wasn't this bit crazy? And I was like, what? And she goes, oh, and I didn't understand the bit you said. And I went, yeah, don't think you watched the same shot. And I was like, what did you watch? She goes, he's and hers.

And I said, no, we watched all her fault. Oh. But I watched it on Netflix at Danny's recommendation. And because she was like, it's really good. It's fucking good. Really? Isn't it set in Chicago in Melbourne? It's not set in Chicago in Melbourne.

Sarah Snook in it? Sarah Snook isn't in it. So why are we? But the leading lady is incredible. She is, oh, like you can't take your eyes off her. And what's the one sentence to not, like, is it a mystery? Is it a thriller? It's a bit of like a whodunit drama.

Okay. So like in the first scene is that like someone's dead and like what's happened. Oh, so to be fair to Danny. I've returned to the small town kind of vibe. Yeah. So she's like a big Atlanta reporter and she goes, no, I'm going back to my small town to investigate this thing. From the continent of Atlanta. Yes.

That's crazy. Yep. Okay. Alaska is what I thought it was. Yeah. His and hers. Yes. On Netflix, it's really good.

Like amazing that Danny watch a buy accident. And then, because I told Torbs that, that she watched this by accident. And we got to the end, he goes, fuck, that was awesome. Nothing like all her fault, though. And he goes, did you tell Danny about X, Y, Z? And I went, yeah. And he goes, how did she think that was the same? Well, maybe that's coming up next bit.

Anyway, his and hers on Netflix. If you're looking for something good to it, it's good. And I mean this as the highest fucking compliment of a show. It does not overstay. It's welcome. it's the right amount of episodes. The episodes are like 40 to 45 minutes. There's no filler.

It's all killer. And I, like, no pun intended. Because aren't, people are dead. Aren't some shows doing an hour for 12 reps? For 12 reps and you go, guns on my head. I could have wrapped that up in 40 minutes, the whole thing. The whole thing. But yeah, it really, it doesn't overstay.

It's welcome. It's well made. It's well written. I really liked it. but you'll love it. I would never speak down to the Great White Lotus. Hmm. I would.

It's fucking dropped off, eh? Lots of filler. Great opening episode. Great premise. Last episode. Cleans it all up. What's going on in the 27 between that? Agreed.

There's some individual episodes where you go, you could have just not done that. You know what? I reckon if you tweeted at Mike White and went, Hey, bro, ever heard of a film? He'd be surprised. I reckon that could write the hell out of a movie. He has.

School of Rock. One of the greatest. Yeah. Do that again. But I'm like, you know, all of those six episodes of the White Lotus, the first one and the last one of all three seasons, they could have been three great movies. Just last end.

Cut the middle out. All good. Those gays are trying to kill me. Yeah. And leave that in, obviously. But no, I... Pick the three memes. Yeah.

Fuck off the middle episodes. Yeah. No, I agree. Make it a movie. I do. I'm a fan of his work. Put it on Channel 7 at Midday. Channel 7.

Yeah. Is the Midday movie still on? Yeah, it is. Aren't they great? It is. Well... Like, as a concept. Not as filmmaking.

Really? Because I'll get home from... Because we always leave Channel 7 on for Pipp. And so you get home and she's terrified. Well, I get home and I'm like, what is this dark as fuck film on? Like it's like, because, you know, a bit of a lifetime movie or fucking, you know, like a telly movie. And they're often pretty grim.

Is Murder She Wrote still getting a run somewhere? What's that? That's the show, A. With Angela Lansprie. Do you know what I'm thinking? Rosemary and Time. Did you ever watch that? No.

I think every time I've mentioned Murder She wrote, you go, I'm familiar. Yeah. No, I'm thinking of Rosemary in time. And do you know what Rosemary in time is? Hang, how's time spelt before I go any further? T-H-Y-M-E-M-E. I hate that so much. Yeah, it's two old ladies that solve crimes together.

Wow. And they're called, you won't believe it. Rosemary and Time. What you won't believe is that is murder she wrote. It's just an old dot. But it's one lady, eh? Yeah, not multiple ladies. So is she, what is the rope?

Like, is she writing a book or is she? So she writes crime novels. Like, she's the original true crime gal. Sure. And so because she, like, writes about murder mysteries, the police are always like, oh, well, you're an expert on murder mysteries. Like, what do you reckon happened? Gotcha.

So hence she wrote. And then she goes, oh, but did you check with the baker? Oh, the gardener might have been around the sign of the building. And I'll tell you, what's the sign of a great TV show, similar to The Simpsons? That the format of every episode is exactly the same. Yeah, but the town changes geography depending on the needs of the story. Oh yeah, you got to adapt. So you know how The Simpsons is in a town in the middle of America

and then they have an episode where they're at the beach and that's fine. Yeah, you just suspend your disbelief. Yeah, they go, oh, I'd really love to do an episode. You know, because you know the boat captain's like a funny guy on The Simpsons. Yeah. And they go, well, how do we get him in? Oh, yeah, there's a port there. But it, yeah, because.

And because Krusty lives at the docks. Yeah. But it's because it. I've never. That's fucked me off. I've never made that connection before But in murder she wrote They'll be like

Oh where did they go And then the personal look at the camera And go must be up near the snow ski fields Which happened to be at the end of the street Oh well let's go check it out You know and it's just like Whatever the story calls for in the moment Just let it roll

Yeah Yeah Oh I think I saw him at the desert Oh you mean that over there Yeah oh behind my house Yeah Near my peach tree Yeah

Yeah And you don't you love to see that But back in the day You could do that Because no one was going to watch it again Like we didn't have the concept of like re-watching a TV show. Oh, but I watched the last episode, which clearly wasn't there. And she hasn't gone anywhere.

Yeah. Yeah. They were, you were less picky then. Oh, I was picky. I can't have a ski slope and a desert being on opposite sides of the same street. There I said it.

You've never played Mario. Happens all the time. As someone who's played a lot of Mario car, I'll have you know. I'll have to stop you right there. All right. We'll chat to you next week. Love you so much.

And if you are in Latvia, which is Riga, Stockholm or Dublin, come and see us at tarp live recordings.com. Tickets available now. You will love to see it. When are we going next weekend? Yeah. I didn't know that. Yeah. I didn't know that.

I didn't know that. That's okay. That's all right. All right. But we're excited. We just didn't know. It's pretty warm in Riga at the moment. Charles, can you Google current temperature?

in Riga. I don't think I want to know. 32 degrees and sunny. Oh. Charles, we don't do pranks. Currently, right now, it is zero degrees with a high of two. Oh, it's going to get up to two. I'll love the amount of people I'm going to have sex with today.

Well, is your husband away? Anyway. Zero degrees. With a high of two. You can get fucked. I'm going to eat so many. potatoes. You're in the right place. Yeah. Stockholm though, it's currently two degrees for the high of nine.

Oh my God. I'm type of bikini. Fuck, you'll have to have a wax. That blew my air on my head. Pop the glasses off your face, that laugh you did. All right, chat to you on Monday. See you later, pinners. What's your PB on your PB? See it, Tom's on big dogs. Catch you ballers later.

Love you, pie. Bye.