Toni and Ryan - Ryan Realises he's Rong

Episode Date: October 1, 2023

Knives out for Netflix! (this will make sense when u listen lol) Toni xoxoCheck out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast. My name is Ryan. This is Dr. Author, bestselling author, Dr. Tony Lodge. Yes. And we are calling, I don't know if it's Dominique or Dominic. What's the difference? Dominique. Dominique. You know the song from American Horror Story, Coven. That is the song that he's playing. Good morning, Brisbane Mortuary and Crematorium.

Oh, big Dom. Big Dom. That's me. How are you, mate? Living the dream. Today is my Friday, so it couldn't be better. Oh, why is that? Long weekend every weekend?

What's going on up there? Enjoying the perks of working from home, so taking a bit of a long weekend this weekend. Yeah, the boss doesn't know. You'll be logging in. Can you just move the mouse a bit for me, sweetie? Yeah, do you want to move it? Well, Dom, will you approve today's episode?

Yeah, full-time job is moving the mouse automatically. Yeah. That is quite good, actually. Maybe you should create an app for that. Yeah, I could do that. Yeah, that's pretty good. Dom, will you approve today's episode? I sure will.

Legend. Hey, it's Dom from Brisbane and I approve this podcast. Happy Monday to you. Happy Monday to ya Happy Monday to ya Happy Monday Monday chat Since you introduced the concept of the ledger Yes

I think there's something we need to add to the ledger Allegedly Or we need to check the ledger A fact review. What do they call it in the cricket? Like a review? Yeah, the DSR. Yeah.

You know how they've got that. Yeah, whatever it is. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, they go to the screen. They do like during the Matildas and stuff. Video replay. Having a review.

Yeah. Sport chat. I believe. Well, coming off the back of big sports weekend. Big sports weekend, yeah. I believe as we get older. Yeah. You know, maybe we're open to new ideas as we grow wiser and more mature.

And I think I may need to change my stance on a certain issue, which again- Charging your phone. You decided you're going to do it. Be a nice guy. You decided to take that up. You've decided to start brushing your teeth finally after all this time. Nah, something that's been, I would say, controversial in the TARP community and quite polarizing. I'm flip-flopping.

I've changed my tune. We'll get to that soon. Oh. First of all, though, Netflix has announced it's going to shut down its DVD rental business where it sends out DVDs in the little red envelope. I forgot they even did that. And I feel like I speak for everyone that went, you're still doing that.

They're still doing that. I thought that finished 15 years ago. Isn't that the fucking pivot of the century? Right. You go, we're all on DVDs. And then they go, we're going to start streaming. And theirs is the strongest platform. 100%.

Like, you know, their platform is so easy to use. Their suggestions are so good. I don't know if I've already told you this a thousand times because it's one of the great stories. Great. They went to Blockbuster and said, give us 50 million and we're yours. Like, buy us. Yeah. And Blockbuster went...

And told them where to go. And now where's Blockbuster? Nowhere. Dead. Ironically, Netflix just brought out a show about the final Blockbuster as a real kick in the dick. It's got... From Brooklyn Nine-Nine. He's in heaps of stuff.

What's his name? Cam. Fact check, Cam. No. He's also in that movie with Ali Wong. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Wait for it, wait for it, wait for it. Randall Park.

Yeah! Randall Park. I knew there was a Park in there. He's in an episode of The Office US and he, like, plays Jim. Yeah. Yeah. And, yeah. Great scene.

Yeah. Anyway. Anyway. I was like, fuck, what's that guy's name? He, like, pops up everywhere. Anyway. Yeah. Amazing.

And isn't that just a real kick in the teeth to go, oh, we're going to make a show about your little video store. And it's, like, very, like, it's blockbuster. Yeah. Like, it's not, oh. Similar. DVD shop. It's blockbuster. Yeah. Like, it's not, oh, DVD shop. Yeah.

Some good news about Netflix shutting the DVD business. And they go, it's to fully concentrate on streaming. I was like, well, yeah. I assume 99% of your business was already doing that. I'd actually, if anybody that's listening was still doing the DVD thing, let us, like, how much was it? What was it? There was an Australian one that they launched called Quick Flicks and it was the same thing.

Like, you got the DVD sent to you. And for a period when I was living with my mum and dad, somebody's Quick Flicks sent to our house. So, we ended up with, like, 10 or so DVDs and none of them were good. They were all, like, drama, like, action-y movies. So, I was like, oh, we didn't even get, like, New York Minute for free. You know what I mean? Yeah.

But we got, like, all of these DVDs and somebody was, like, sending them to our house. And I was like, what is this business model? Because we- So, what we do is we send DVDs to random people in Perth and then we don't do anything. Well, yeah, but then we ended up with all these DVDs and like, we probably could have called them, but we didn't. Of course not. But like, how do they know you're going to send them back?

I also, I know that this isn't what this chat is about. I also wonder who's doing those DVD drop things out the front of the shops. Oh, like in the vending machine? Yeah, like the video easy vending machine, how you'd click and you'd go, yeah, let's watch Gladiator tonight and the DVD would drop out. I'm pretty sure one guy from San Francisco went to Japan on holidays and came back and went, vending machines, it's the future.

You can get everything in them. And then, like, that surely didn't take off. Good news for people who still use the DVD service of Netflix. They said, oh, by the end of September, if you've got a DVD, you can just have it. Maybe. You would get New York Minute for free. Should we sign up? What's the date?

Oh, fuck. Damn it. Oh, no. Hang on. What's the time difference? Is it still September in America? That would have been. We could have ordered so much stuff and kept it all.

So, basically, because, I mean. I don't even have a DVD player. Great point. Neither do I. Oh, actually, we have a DVD player. Great point. Neither do I. Oh, actually, we have a PlayStation. Do I have it in my computer? No, they don't do that in computers anymore. They haven't for years.

Oh, yeah. You can get like USB ones that you like plug in. But yeah, we've got a PS, like a PlayStation. Yeah. So you can play a video. Oh, my God. A DVD in that, I think this you know how we joked a while ago about this podcast aging up yeah we just turned 65 years literally yeah oh i think

you can put the vega dress in there um but you can imagine in the office they've gone oh and when they send them back and someone goes what are we going to do with them all and someone just goes do you reckon we just say keep it? Surely. Just call it in. It would be like if your business was closing down in any sense and you'd go, you know what, the more stuff we sell or the more stuff we get rid of, the less we've got to deal with or like try and dispose of or whatever.

And surely people having it would be better like for the environment because people might still watch them rather than, what are they going to do, burn them all? Remember when you used to burn DVDs? Yeah. But what would they do? Put them in the like landfill yeah yeah you may as well just keep watching New York donate you know what you should do donate them all to the ultimate frisbee in your city and they could use them for that for training yeah slinging them around slice someone in half um you did say before it was one of the great pivots. Yeah.

I've got three businesses here that I didn't realise had done hectic pivots. So, we're going to play a quiz. I'm going to tell you the business and you're going to tell me what they used to do. Okay. I'm just going to say I didn't know what a firefighter was last week. So, I just want to put that out there for everybody that- And so many people are so annoyed. They're like, I was on the bus listening to the podcast screaming firefighter.

Someone commented and they were like, there's no way she didn't know. And I was like, I really wish that I was like- I actually would give anything to tell you that, yeah, I was just playing along. I wasn't. I'm an idiot. Where do you live? DCI. Dumb Sea Island. D do you live? DCI. Dum Sea Island.

Dum Cala Conti Island. First one is Nokia, which is going to say now sells phones, but even that feels like a back in the day company. Didn't Apple just decimate Nokia? So when I was in high school. It was the phone to have. Everyone had Nokias and not only did everyone have Nokia's, having a phone was coming into fashion. Yeah.

So, imagine this. This thing's coming into fashion and you're the best at doing that thing. Don't you reckon they're just going- We've got this locked up. The next decade is just going to be fucking ours, caviars and lobsters. Yeah. And they were the first ones to do the phone with the full QWERTY keyboard as well. The E63 and the E71.

I wanted that phone so bad. My mom never bought it for me and I'm still not over it. Over the weekend, someone told me that they had an E63 and I almost punched him in the face. Please don't. I was just so upset. Torbz had one as well. I'm like, ugh. They were great.

But Nokia really fucked up, eh? Anyway, what do you think Nokia used to do? Oh, they used to do? Oh! They used to do something that wasn't phones? Yeah. Okay. Alright. I actually don't give a fuck what you say because you're not going to get it right. Okay. Hang on. I reckon that the

most, like, natural thing would be something else in tech, like creating a different... Incorrect! Oh! Something where- Okay, so if it wasn't- Ironically, we have mentioned something similar in this episode already.

DVDs. It's a long stretch of a clue that makes no sense. Okay, great. Okay, stop doing the song. The song makes it harder. All right, so if it wasn't tech and it wasn't like a product, books. Sort of close. Further back in history.

Oh, my God. Oh, the ledger. They created the ledger. They were a paper mill. Dundamiflin. Yes. Really? Yeah.

Oh, so they went, well, paper's out. Phones are in. Yeah. And they nailed that. Now they're into NFTs. Thank you for snake. You know what I mean? They can spot a winner.

Paper. Yeah. Was it still called Nokia? Yeah. Next one is Avon, the classic. Oh, the like cosmetics. Cosmetics. And was maybe this is a bit old now,

but it was like traditionally like a door to door kind of real old school. And like those little parties and just like real person to person sales. Yeah. And or you'd get that like your Avon rep would give you the catalogue and you'd have to order through them. You couldn't just like order online. Even having the Avon rep is just a real moment in time, isn't it? Yeah.

And everyone had, like, I feel like everyone's mum had a friend group from school. Someone did Tupperware. Someone did the clothes. Someone did, yeah. Okay, what did Avon used to do? Shawl. I'm thinking it must be something cosmetic vibes.

Incorrect. I just can't imagine them not doing that. They did phones. They invented snake. Oh, I'm going to go. Okay. I'm going to go food. Like some food thing.

Avon was created by David H McConnell Good for him And he started the business by himself One man business And he went door to door selling books Everyone's in the paper game No so basically this is what happens right Everyone got out

So he's gone door to door selling books Like way back in the day Yeah And then apparently he like wasn't having much luck with like the females in the house. They weren't buying. So, he goes, maybe if I give him a little perfume sample, that'll like sweeten him up and get him on site and get him in my good books. So, then- No pun intended.

So, then when I go to sell- That's funny. When I go to sell him a book, they'll be like in a better mood. And then so, he started doing that and it was working. But then word got around that this guy's going door to door. He's the guy with the good perfume. And the perfume became more well known than the books. And then he kind of goes.

Do I go all in on perfume? Yeah. And then and this is like over 100 years ago. He's like, what if I hired, believe it or not, a wild idea, women into the workforce because a woman's more likely to buy a perfume off another woman. And he like created women's having jobs. I mean, that's a bit of a stretch for me.

But like, yeah. And so then- That's insane. That's how that happened. And then it becomes like this insane bazillion dollar company. And even like, you know, the movie Edward Scissorhands, that whole movie is based on like Avon calling. Like that's how she goes to the house.

I thought you were going to be like, yeah. And then he replaced his hands with scissors. And I was like, no. And that's you. That's the guy. All right, final one. And this is the craziest one ever. And it's fucked because we use it.

Oh. Slack. Oh, like the IM. Yeah. So, for those of you that don't know Slack, a lot of workplaces use it to message each other, to keep ideas. All the team can log into Slack. It's exactly like Teams and all of those kinds of things. Yeah.

If you work in an office, you'll kind of know what Slack is. But this is just wild shit. Just throw the dumbest fucking thing you've ever thought of out. Scooters. Close. No. Slack used to be a video game. Really? Called The video game. Really?

Called The Glitch, right? And it launched in 2011 and it got shut down like a few months later because it just sucked. But in the game, like if we're playing like a shoot-em-up game, we could like personally message each other and be like, you go around the back and I'll like go and shoot him in the front. So, the game sucked. But then someone goes. But the messaging part was really good this messaging thing there's

something in that and like now thousands of workplaces around the world use the same technology that was built from the game called the glitch and that's what slack is now it was a video game 12 years ago you sound like a boss who's, like, making work fun. I am making work fun. This used to be a game. Am I making work fun? Yeah. I'm excited.

This is fun. I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm interested. It's business chat. But you know when, like- It's Monday. We're back to the office.

It's business time. I know you've had a long weekend, but we're back to work now. We're back to work. But you know when they'd be like, oh, yeah, it's like a game. It's so easy to use. Yeah. I actually rate Slack. Yeah.

I'm glad it's no longer a game. That's actually very interesting. Thank you for saying that because I thought my boring business chat would be boring business chat. Well, given the other ones all used to be paper, you're like, yeah, so Slack used to make. Was it paper? They used to make letters.

And it was just basically Slack but took way longer. The bloody post office. Yeah, that'll get you. That'll get you. Hey, it's Dom from Brisbane and you're listening to Tony and Ryan. A massive shout out to a few of our champion tapas over at our Patreon. Tapas, Tony and Ryan podcast. Megan Redkey.

Good on you, Megan. Thank you. Maximilian Linker. Your mate. Paul Henry Basilio. Basilio. Paloma Alisaf. Thanks, Paloma.

I'm into Palomas ever since that. The grapefruit. The grapefruit person up the road. No, not that kind of grapefruit. So, you know, have you guys seen the thing online? Glizzies? Grapefruiting. Oh, sorry.

Oh, yeah, about the. Yeah, and it's like. What's glizzies? Well, it's like 100 glizzies. Yeah, so someone showed me that on the weekend and I didn't know what it was and I'm upset now. You've learned a few things over the last few shows. Yeah, and I just preferred to not know. You know, like ignorance is bliss kind of thing. It really is.

It actually is. Yeah, I didn't know that there was these parts of the internet where people were sharing things like that and I just think, wow, no thanks. But do you feel like I've learned something that I could wheel into my life? I just have. So maybe everything is valuable and knowledge is power. Anyway, Claire Vale, thank you so much. And Lords Rodney and Evan Stickles Palmer.

We've had words with Rodney and Evan. Evan. Rodney and Evan. Yeah. I don't know. Rodney Stickles Palmer. Yes. Evan.

No. Will they share an account? Anyway. I wish they weren't as lovely when we met them. I know. I know. Anyway. Because I would love to go to we met them I know, I know, anyway Because I would love to go to town

Like, no, not like that I've already seen her A hundred glizzies More, okay Thank you so much for being part of the Patreon, absolutely love to see it There's lots of good shit in there, so you can check it out The biggest sign of Wisdom, intellect and maturity

Is the ability to change your mind when presented with new information. Beautiful. Who said that? Did you just make that up? Yep. Did you Google that? Chat GMT. The opposite is like ego and stubbornness and stupidity almost.

You know when you just back in an idea and then it's clearly true, but you've gone too far. Yeah. No. When presented with new information, I believe it's mature and smart to change your mind. I completely agree. I'm a big fan of this, as you know. I want to talk about the highly political and polarizing issue that I've previously been quite stern on, and I think I've changed my mind. Enlighten me.

I want to talk about putting knives in the dishwasher. No, Ryan. We're both on the same side. Ryan. No. Previously on this show. No, let's take five. You guys wait.

No, we're on the same side. Previously on the show, we have said, yes, put knives in the dishwasher. It's way easier. And then when you wash knives by hand, you're at risk of cutting yourself. And I- Well, I didn't say that because that's something silly that you- I cut myself three times in eight months trying to cut the same knife and I cut myself on the same part of my thumb.

Well, I think, you know, fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Yeah. So, after that episode, people from the hospitality biz, people from Big Knife- Just Knifeife, people from Big Dishwasher, everyone was, like, coming for us like it was the fucking hundred glizzies. Because the first thing was that people were like, it is bad for your knives, right? It, like, dulls the blade or whatever. I just don't think that that's right.

Anyway. Yep. I'm willing to go with new information, so lay it on me, dog. Check out my thumb there Yeah it's rough The other day It happened again So I wanted to have a yoghurt And like

Well I mean instantly my brain is thinking Knife yoghurt They don't go together So we were out of spoons. So I put No, no, no. It's not. No, no, no. I'm going to leave. I'm literally going to walk out that door. I'm going to get a job at Avon. I'm going to get a job at Avon. Selling door to door. You live in an apartment building. You didn't even have to leave your own address and you'd make sales all up and down that building.

There you go. So, I know there's some spoons in the dishwasher. So, I put my hand into the dishwasher to grab a spoon and my thumb went straight- DCI. That's your fault. Straight into the blade. And it was the word- Like, it actually squirted and covered up- Yes, Tony's got a hand up.

Question. Where do you put the knives in your dishwasher? In the top drawer that's like a cutlery only drawer. Like laying down? No, like it slots in the slot. So, we don't have the cutlery drawer in our dishwasher. It's just like a two level one. It doesn't have that third cutlery thing.

So, I lay it down in the long, like, utensil bit. Yeah. So, not in the basket sticking up because that's danger town, but, like, laying down. And that's lies the problem. Right. So, I just put my – threw my hand into the dishwasher. I mean, you can't be putting your hand in places you can't see,

except for, you know. When you're with – who's that singer we like now? Dua Lipa. No. I mean, we like her, but the other, the Swedish girl. Zara Larsson? Zara Larsson. Is she Swedish?

I think so. Oh. Doesn't that make her even hotter than she already is? So, I put my hand straight into the blade and then it, like, it starts squirting out and it was gross and I had to wrap my hand and then I was, like, holding Mabel with my left arm, trying to wrap my right arm with itself. And then Bridget comes down and goes, oh know like she heard me scream because i went oh and then she comes down and goes oh what what happened and i go oh the knife and she goes oh

we are cleaning it again and i went no i was in the dishwasher and she goes what happened i said i'll put my hand and she goes oh so are you implying that maybe knives should not go in the dishwasher because it's a hazard? I love that Bridget hasn't even, like, she's not even waiting till later to tell you, like, told you so. Like, she's just like, you're still, like, holding the baby, trying to wrap your hand up and she's like, well, I told you. She feigned sympathy for about 0.8 of a second and before going,

you wouldn't fucking read about it. And she actually pissed herself laughing. Like, I've never seen her laugh so hard. And she goes, oh, you were right the whole time. And then she went, hang on, no. You've been on the- No! And then it all starts clicking and she's like- I was trying to like, hey, can you hold Mabel? And she's like, I can't be trusted with our baby at the moment. I'm actually laughing too hard and having too much fun right now. So, even though I am someone who is willing to take on,

it doesn't look very, it looks very sore. I think it's, um, the cut has been. Infected. Yeah. It does look quite red. Yeah. Have you been washing it? No, because I put a bandaid on it for three days, but I swam in the pool, so the bandaid

got wet and soggy, but I kept it on. And then it frayed and it kind of looked like it was a spiky-haired doll, like a troll doll. Okay. Well, then you deserve for it to be infected, because that is so silly. But I- So, I think we can all agree well no hang on let's not let's not go crazy because i am very happy to take on new information and change my mind remember i very famously did that on that video of me talking about toilet seats the toilet seats i said i didn't know that they had a function

you said yes they do and i went oh well i didn't know that so like i take it all back yeah that's fine i'm very comfortable but you are wisdom intellect all those words we used before yeah all that that's me puns lodge that's what they say yeah but you could argue that the knives do belong in the dishwasher in fact you just have to be a bit smarter about where you put them and maybe look before you put your hand in somewhere because i actually refuse to be a bit smarter about where you put them. And maybe look before you put your hand in somewhere. Because I actually refuse to be wrong about the knives in the dishwasher because I think it just makes sense. It's a dishwasher.

What's a knife? A dish. Put it in. No, a dish is a dish. Well, then it's not a knife and a cutlery washer. No, it's not. But it's a dishwasher. You put your cutlery in there, your knives, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.

I think having been stabbed by a dishwasher with a knife, that I think they're pretty clear about what their expectations are. But let's say- Are you saying use error? I think I was just about- You took the words right out of my mouth. Use error. Like a dishwasher with a fork, spoon, knife.

Sure. Fuck. The thing is, is that you have used that like an absolute fuckhead. Because you put them facing out in the thing. Like, that's so silly. And then you didn't even look at where you were putting your hand. Like, I can't. If you've got a baby in one arm and you've got yogurt on the brain and, like, blueberry yogurt, not even just regular.

You know how fucking yum blueberry yogurt is? And then I'm going to have to go in there and, you know, yoga my way through to, no, no, no. You just put your hand in and you grab it. But you did that and it didn't work out for you. No. I still haven't had the yogurt. The problem is, though, that you don't learn from your mistakes.

No. You get stubborn. Yep. No, no, no. The premise of this whole thing was I have learned from my mistakes and I will no longer- No, but I'm saying to you that it was user error and you're saying, no, no, no, no, no. You don't put knives in the dishwasher. So, is that what you're saying now?

Like, you're not going to put knives in the dishwasher anymore? You've learned your lesson? Yeah. Wow. That's good. Thank you. So, then when you're washing them by hand. I've hired a maid.

Because it seems like it doesn't matter where the knives are, you still manage to slice your finger open. You know how, like. I'm just, I'm on your side. Yeah, I know, I know. You know how there's that thing for people who are like us, podcasters or creators and stuff. And it's like people can say a hundred nice comments about you, but like the one person that says a mean one,

it kind of just like hits a bit harder. And the logical part of your brain goes, oh, just literally one out of a hundred, don't worry about it. But you're like, it's sometimes it just fucking hits you. Yeah. So, this guy commented last time. Oh, mate. But he wasn't being mean.

And I think that's what hurt the most. Because he sounded like he was on my side. Yeah. And this is what he said. He said, sounds like my guy can't handle his blade. And the fact he said my guy was like, he's on my team. And the way he said his blade made it sound like a man should be able to work. The way that sentence was divided up I just went, I can't handle my blade.

Yeah, but it sounds like you can't handle it anywhere. So maybe knives are for big boys and maybe you just don't use them. I want to be a big boy with his own knife. Well, it sounds like you can't be trusted. I can't be. You can't be trusted if you put them in the washing up, in the, like, hand washing. Sounds like you can't deal with them in the dishwasher.

Bridget said we would get plastic butter knives. That does sound like you. Like a party pack. She did have to buy you your own frying pan because you fucked up the non-stick one. That was not to be spoken about on the show because it was embarrassing. Well... Do you think... Okay. Maybe... With all this information in mind, do you still think

I should go on alone? I'm sitting there on my couch being like, what a fucking idiot. He can't even build a kayak out of a matchstick. You know what I mean? Like, I'm judging them and they're doing amazing things. I mean, that is the classic, you know, like, easy to say, hard to do kind of thing. My guy can't handle his blade. I don't know who wrote that, but it really hit me. Yeah.

I don't think they're a listener of the podcast. I'm going to put it out there. I don't think that they listen. But he said my guy, like it was like he wanted me to be able to handle my blade. Yeah. And I wish that you could too. I'm sure that most people are like, God, wish that Ryan could do that. I'm sure my blade would love to be handled.

Yeah. I'm really sorry. I'm going to keep putting my knives in the dishwasher, though, because I know how to look at it before I put my hand in there. I'm really sorry, Matt. Are you okay? No, it sucks. Oh, you sound really sad now, and I don't want that.

Okay. Give me your love to see it from the back. I've got a good one. I have a pretty good one myself. You go. I've got a recommendation. I love it. It's a grapefruit.

It's a Monday. We've just had the weekend. Yep. This is quite a weekend based. You love to see it. Okay. But I think that it could happen any time of the morning through the week. Scones with jam and cream.

Fuck yeah. You don't have to cut them with a knife. You can just rip them. Just rip them open. Yep. Scones with jam and cream. Torps, my partner, he went to the shop to go get stuff for dinner over the weekend. Yep.

And he comes back and he goes, oh, yeah, I've got the meat for the pasta and I got whatever, whatever, whatever. And then he goes, I've got one more thing. See if you can guess what it is. And I said, oh, I don I've got, like, the meat for the pasta and I've got whatever, whatever, whatever. And then he goes, I've got one more thing. See if you can guess what it is. And I said, oh, I don't know, maybe, like, a sweet treat. And he goes, you're onto something there. Sweet plus carbs. I saw this.

He pulls out, like, a thing of scones that he just got from, like, the bakery at Coles. And he goes, saw these, really felt like a scone. And I said, did you get jam and cream? And before I'd even finished the sentence, he pulls, saw these, really felt like a scone. And I said, did you get jam and cream? And before I'd even finished the sentence, he pulls out the jam, pulls out the cream and, like, pulls the key to my heart out of the bag because, oh, my God. Did you even bother with dinner?

We just ate six scones each. If someone pulled a scone on me. And that's the thing. A scone has to be a surprise scone. Yeah. You can't go, oh has to be a surprise scone. Yeah. You can't go, oh, I'll plan on scones. If someone pulled a scone on me with cream and jam and they go, yeah, cool, after we have pasta, I'd be like.

Can the pasta wait till tomorrow, Dom? Kind of, yeah. Yeah. I'll have the pasta after the scone. So I would just like to maybe suggest. That has brought me back. Yeah. That anybody listening, maybe surprise your housemate,

your mum, your partner, whoever. Do a surprise scone. Don't talk to them about it first. I think the element of surprise with a scone and the thoughtfulness of going, I've got the jam, I've got the cream, I've got the scones, you make the cup of tea. And they go, you've come with a plan. And I love to see that.

My grandma Betty is a scone maker. Oh, beautiful. But now that you mention it, I don't think she's a scone announcer. She just rolls in. You just got to have a surprise scone. She goes, come around for a cup of tea and I go, okay. She goes, I made some scones and you just go, oh, grandma. Because it's just that thing where you go, oh, that thought you've put into that scone. Yeah, that's brought me back. Yeah. That's really good. A surprise scone. Do that for your friends and family this week. Let me know how you go. Before my day gets ruined, I've got a missed call from our accountant.

Is that something I should be concerned about? Oh, that's not good. Okay, fine. Yeah. Okay. He texted me last week at 8pm. That's not good. And he goes, Tony, can we talk tomorrow?

And I go, fuck, okay. Well, I guess let's just talk now because otherwise I won't be able to sleep tonight. Fuck, okay. I'll deal with that now. Maya, I love to say it. This story doesn't, okay, I'll deal with that now. My love to see it. This story doesn't start great, but, like, bear with me. Okay. Like a lot of boys my age, boys, not men,

because we're not handling weights. No knives. I loved the Mighty Ducks when I was little. Oh, quack. Quack, quack, quack, quack, quack, quack, quack, quack, quack. Oh, ducks. Yeah. I always wanted the jersey that they, like, the, yeah.

One of my favourites is Goldberg the goalie. Oh, yes. Great character. Loved him. The actor's name is Sean, and like a lot of former child actors, like, can sometimes struggle to, like, adapt to the real world and being an adult and stuff like that. Unfortunately, you know, he used, like, drugs to, you know,

mask the pain and deal with stuff. And he kind of ended up in a bit of a bad way. He ends up getting like arrested for possession and just sort of, you know, really hit a bad spot. That's awful, yeah. And they have his mugshot taken. And like the TMZs and the Daily Mails of the world, you know, don't they just love a fallen star?

And just a really. It's so sad. You know, kick someone while they're down. And, you know, look at him now. And it's just, you know, seeing someone at their worst. Four years later, my love to see it is that not only has our boy, Sean, he hasn't drunk a drop or taken anything for the whole four years. Four years sober is coming up and he's completed like a rehab program.

And now he's actually working for the rehab program, coaching other people who are like doing the thing and like helping them through. And because he's like, I've been there. Here's what helped me. Here's what can help you. And let me just read this. I almost got emotional when I was reading it earlier. I achieved a lot in comedy and acting,

but getting sober and helping others do the same is my most proudest accomplishment of my life. And he says, I'll let you know that when they take your mugshot, there's no Instagram filter or Photoshop. They really get you on your worst day and that mugshot lives forever. And he goes, it still haunts me because it pops up and people go, oh, fuck, I saw that thing. And he's like, why don't they have a Daily Mail article that goes, I've been sober for years. Look how great he looks now. You just don't see them. But he fucking looks great and I loved him when he was a kid

and I just read that and I was like, fucking good on you, man. That's awesome. You do love to see that. Yeah, you love to see that. Oh, good on you, Sean. Yeah, Sean's his name. And just wasn't Goldberg just the most lovable character? Yes.

Such a sweetheart. I mean, they were all quite nice, weren't they? Yeah. The thing about the mugshot, you know how it's like a thing now? Like, Trump knows he's going in, so he, like, practices his stare. Yeah, you get ready or whatever. Didn't Paris Hilton get done for something? Like, it was a tax thing.

She forgot to pay a tax, and she rocks up for her mugshot, and she's, like, got a face on and looking all good. But, I mean, you can't blame them because, literally, it's exactly what he just said. Like, everyone's going to see it. And, you know, like that would be really hard living in the public eye to that extent. Yeah. Like and people also are really not nice sometimes and they love to see other people fail. Yeah.

And that's that's really sad. But how amazing that he's like turned his life around. Yeah. Four years is a long time. That's not just like a blip or a tried something. No, that's like, oh, and, you know, doing the work. Doing the work. Good on you, mate. Good on you.

Oh, have a jam and scream in me. What did I say? Jam and scream. Scone with jam and cream is what I meant. Jam and scream. Sorry, Sean. Don't have a jam and scream. It's tomorrow on the show.

Oh, by the way, we're in New Zealand Saturday. Yes. In Auckland, 10am at Brito Mart. We're coming, we're coming, we're coming. Tomorrow on the show is Confessions. You can submit those at tonyandryan.com.au. These are top confessions. I don't know if you're going to like this.

Someone lied in a job interview. Was it you when I hired you? Wanted. One sidekick. vice captain inferior muscles someone with a name that sounds good with tony oh speaking of me being your sidekick tony comes to my house the other day and there's this lady like who's helping with the garden and tony rocks up right and the lady who's's helping with the garden. And Tony rocks up, right? And the lady who's like helping with the garden goes, oh, I know you. You're that girl from that podcast. And she comes once a week and like.

She's been going to Ryan's house for like three months. Like weekly. She's fixing this thing out the back and it's like a bit of an ongoing project. She goes, yeah, you're that person with that podcast. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's like, you're so funny. Yeah, and goes on and on and on about it. And then I go.

She's like, I've read your book. Like, I love your TikTok. Like, literally, like, massive fan. And then she goes to me. She goes, how do you know her? Oh, my. And you want to know what I said? The most cutting thing, because this guy doesn't know how to use a blade.

I go, we work together. And she goes, oh, I never made the connection. And then, yeah, and then like half an hour later, she goes to Ryan's wife, Bridget, and goes, oh, I never recognised him. But as soon as I saw Tony, I thought, I know who she is. She goes, I didn't realise your husband was the guy that worked with that funny girl. Great for me. Great for me Great for me

Couldn't shut fucking Tony up all day I'm just that funny girl And that's fine you don't need to know my name But call me that funny girl any day of the week It wasn't like you're those funny two people It was like you're that guy who works with that funny girl And she was right You are that guy that works with that funny girl

That funny humble girl Who definitely won't lord this over you for the rest of the day That beautiful, humble woman. All right. But tomorrow, lying in a job interview. Oh, you love to say that. No, you don't. And it really...

Let me read the last line of the confession. The employer still doesn't know and I haven't said a thing till now. Did producer Cam write this? All right, we'll chat to you tomorrow. Love you, bye.