Toni and Ryan - Ryan's been caught CHEATING

Episode Date: August 31, 2021

I know what you're all thinking - how can it be?! You need to hear this one. Plus we chat about me needing to get a stylist (rude). Love u xxx Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Tony, I'm going to call you my haunted house because I scream every time I'm in here. He said, when you say scream, imagine if you were having sex with someone and they were like, I really like, oh, this feels really good. Like they just watched The Ring. No pun intended. LAUGHTER Welcome to episode four of Tony and Ryan. Oh, that's eight. You're holding up eight fingers.

Tony's holding up four fingers on each hand. Because I'm double excited about episode four. No? No. Sorry, I'm just trying to be excited. Hey, in the last episode, I said there was something in the back of my car that led Bridget to believe that I was cheating on her and she confronted me about it. Okay.

You, Tony Felicia Lodge, started giggling like a schoolgirl as if you had something to do with this, but I don't think that's right. So what else has happened? Before I get to this story, what have you done in the back of my car? Well, so do you remember a few weeks ago when we weren't in lockdown and you and I went and had a bunch of professional photos taken? Yes. And I...

Which is the cover for the podcast. For the podcast. You've all seen it. And you messaged me the next day and said you left your shirt in the back of my car. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And Bridget, because you said to Bridget, oh, hey, your shirt's in the back of my car.

And she went, that's not mine. And then obviously an awkward conversation where you had to tell your wife that it was my T-shirt. It must be Tony's just throwing her clothes around in the backseat of my Volkswagen Golf. Oh, must be nice, Volkswagen. I just mentioned that because there's obviously not a lot of room in a Golf to just be throwing things around.

Could have been a Hyundai Getso, couldn't it? But it wasn't. It was a Volkswagen Golf. Things are going well. Yeah. Reversing camera and everything in that bad boy. It does, actually. It is quite nice. It's pretty nice. And I had to park a car the other that bad boy. It does, actually. It is quite nice.

It's pretty nice. And I had to park a car the other day that didn't have that. Oh, God. I know. Once you've tasted the life of the reversing camera, you're like, but how do I know where the edge of the wall is? Oh, I can't believe it. How did you open the door yourself as well?

Or did Jeeves come out and bloody open the door for you? Yeah, and I said, Jeeves, you better have your gloves on. Don't you be putting your dirty little mitts in my car. Yeah, we're in a pandemic. Before I tell you what happened with Bridge, let me share this. Sorry, so this is a different. A different occasion. Before I tell you this one, which far out,

it's not looking good for me at the moment. Let me tell you about Chloe, who lives in Melbourne, who actually posted online a story about how she caught her husband cheating on her. Oh, Chloe, I'm so sorry. I'm also sorry, Chloe, but I reckon you're better off without this guy. They've got divorced.

Oh. Because once you hear his... That's a bloody expensive old business, isn't it? It really is. Divorce. Yeah. Far out. Yep.

Let me just read what she posted online. Okay. Which I'm sad for Chloe, but also, like I said, she's dodged a bullet because this guy sounds like an idiot because this is the worst excuse I've ever heard. Oh. So, like I said, she's dodged the bullet because this guy sounds like an idiot because this is the worst excuse I've ever heard. I was doing my husband's tax and I found a receipt for a helicopter flight with champagne breakfast. But I, his wife, don't recall going on a champagne breakfast.

And you'd remember. You'd remember in a hot air balloon. Was it a helicopter or a hot air balloon? Sorry, no, no. It was a hot air balloon. I said the wrong thing. It was a hot air balloon. Can you read? Apparently, no, no. It was a hot air balloon. I said the wrong thing. It was a hot air balloon. Can you read?

Apparently not. Apparently not. It was a... They both start with H. I can't do two H's. Does your butler normally read for you as well? Yeah, he really does. Let me get this straight.

Yeah. Hot air balloon. Hot air balloon. Which is romantic. Yeah, sorry. Helicopter. That's just transport for, you know, regular rich people like me. No.

Hot air balloon is romantic. You go at sunrise. Champagne breakfast, beautiful. You're definitely getting lucky after that. A hundred percent. If you're not. What have you done wrong? Check yourself.

Yeah. So the husband goes, oh, yeah, that was just with the boys. Imagine thinking that was going to work. Imagine this. Tony Lodge, you find a receipt for a hot air balloon champagne breakfast and you confront Torbs. And he goes, oh, yeah, me and Ryan just went for a sexy sunrise champagne and sipped on some sparkling.

No way. There's just no way. And so he backed that in. He was like, yep, me and the boys want to do this. And she obviously like sniffed around and realised pretty quickly that that didn't happen. It was like, show me a photo of the boys. So you're saying.

Yeah, she rang Damo and was like, mate, did you and Steve go and do this? Yeah. And he's like, no, that sounds like the most romantic date, not with the boys thing to do. So obviously Chloe gets to the bottom of it. Turns out he's been whining, dining. Sixty-nining. Whining, dining.

Sixty-nining as someone from the admin staff at his work. A work wife. A work wife. And he's now with the work wife and divorced Chloe. Oh, you'd be absolutely gutted, wouldn't you? I mean, but again, if someone's dumb enough to play the I was with the boys card, you're better off without them. And also leave the literal receipts.

If he tries to claim it on tax, she does the books for his thing. So that's the dumbest thing I've ever heard. One, why did he think he could claim that on tax? Yeah, what's the business he's doing about tax write-off? Let's record next week's episodes in a hot air balloon and we're like, oh, it's for tax purposes. That's a good idea. Do you reckon we could get away with that?

Well, no, because it's locked down. We'll ask Chloe. We'll ask Chloe. But I'll tell you right now, no, because I've locked down it. And also to write stuff off, and there's a great scene from this that's on TikTok. You know when they're like, oh, who writes it off? The government people.

You need to earn an income to write stuff off again. Oh, we don't earn an income. We've got day jobs. and there's a great scene from this that's on TikTok. You know when they're like, oh, who writes it off? The government people. You need to earn an income to write stuff off again. Oh, we don't earn an income. We've got day jobs. I work at IGA during the day. So, all right. Let me tell you what happened with Bridget and I. Okay. Chloe, our thoughts are with you.

Do I need to be worried? Are you going down the same route? Are you not wearing your wedding ring? That's not good. I've actually worn my wedding ring in months. That's so weird to me that you not wearing your wedding ring? That's not good. I've actually worn my wedding ring in months. That's so weird to me that you never wear your wedding ring. I go through phases. Oh, my God.

Do you know what the funniest thing ever that you've told me? This is a story for everybody listening. Ryan told me once that he always takes his wedding ring off when he goes to the toilet because he's worried that it's going to get stuck up his bum. No, that's not true. That's not true. That's what you said to me. You said, I'm really worried that my wedding ring will get stuck.

I don't want a wife and have less on my hands than when I put my hands on. You don't want more either. I want to have the same amount. You don't want to gain or lose anything on your skin when you're wiping your bum. That is for sure. So you said, I'm really worried that I'll take it off to wash my hands and then leave it in the bathroom. Or go down the sink or up there or it'll drop in the toilet.

So you never wear it. It's very funny. But no, when I go to the bathroom, I put it in my pocket or something and then often I just leave it there for the rest of the day. And then it gets stuck in the washing machine. Yeah. Either way. And you've just bought a brand new washing machine.

We have, actually. That's interesting. You're really painting an interesting picture of how my life goes. Yeah, well, you've got a great life. You've got a washing machine and a car. Whoa. And you never wear your wedding ring. Anyway, how are things going with you and Bridget?

Is it going south? So this time every year, maybe not as much in COVID, but this time every year a lot of people start thinking, which is ridiculous, summer's coming, I'm going to start getting fit. You know, hashtag summer body, bikini body, whatever that means. But it's like it's dumb, but you're feeling me, right? Yeah, and it gets me every time. Yeah, it really does.

So Bridge and I a few years ago said, okay, we're going to go swimming three times a week. We're going to do laps. You've said the same thing to me. We talked about it last week. I'm a swim tease. So we're like, we'll go three times a week. So we went to Kmart and we bought like some towels.

I got some boardies. Nice. We got some like sort of, you know, swimming stuff, bathers, bikini, whatever you. Swimming stuff. Swimming stuff. So we're all, you know, all the gear, no idea. Yeah.

How many times do you reckon we went swimming? I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt. Don't. And I'm going to say that you did it for a week. So you went three times. Lower. Oh, did you go at all? No, we didn't go a single time.

You didn't even go once? Oh, maybe I went, but Bridget never went. Not a single time did she go to the pool. Oh, my God. Okay. So about two weeks later, she goes to put something in the backseat of the car and there's a bikini on the backseat of the car. So you hooked up with a bird while you were swimming? Incorrect, Tony Lodge. Bridget says, whose are these?

And I'm like, what do you mean? I've never really seen them. And she's like, oh yeah, likely story. Tell me right now, there's a girl's bikini or most bikinis are girls. There's a girl's bikini in the back of your car and I want answers. Whose are they and why are they not on the said person? And I really, I really like Bridget. You guys are really good friends. But she's quite scary. She can be quite scary.

Can she? Well, I can imagine her getting quite stern. Is that right? Can't you? A little editorial from Tony Locke? No, but I could like. You're talking about my wife. No, she's like so lovely.

But the same way that I can go from zero to 100, I can imagine that Bridget could go from zero to 100. Am I wrong? Can she not get quite stern? Not really. Oh, really? That's interesting that you think that. Good to know.

Not that I think that. Because. So anyway. God, you're not going to cheat on her with me. I can't really put my foot in it. Better to put your foot in it than a finger. Oh, I'll get you when you're in my bum. She said, I've never seen those bikinis before.

They're not mine. And it turns out they were the ones that she bought. That she never used. The reason she'd never seen them is because she never went to the ball and wore them. They were sitting there. They still had their tags on. They still had their tags on.

So it's clear she can go from zero to 100. And then back down to zero. I wasn't wrong. Well, I'm glad to hear that there's nothing going wrong there. Thank you. That's good to know. Thank you. I appreciate that.

But maybe tell her to get her own stuff out of the car and my T-shirts also. Yeah, or maybe you'd remember wearing the bikini if you actually put it on and went to the pool like we planned. Oh, aggressive. Well, who's turned now? That was aggressive.

Who's turned now? Can I just put a little side note here? Uh-huh. We've talked about this before. One thing I'm loving about lockdown is just remembering how much Bridget and I just really get along and hang out at home, just the two of us, and we're loving it. Yeah. So the other night, and I don't know if this is cute or, you know, when you think it's cute and everyone else is like,

that sounds like the lamest thing ever. Yeah, or everyone else is like. So we had the funniest night ever. Such a good time. We ordered choc-tops and when they arrived, we decided they looked like little microphones so we pretended to do stand-up comedy to each other whilst talking into the choc-tops. It's so sad. pretended to do stand-up comedy to each other whilst talking into the chalk tops. That is the cutest thing I've ever heard.

Because we got the chalk tops and Bridget's like, these kind of feel like microphones. Like, well, I was getting the aeroplane food and you were like... That is really funny. Maybe we shouldn't put this in the podcast and we should make a video out of that. Just do it. Who wants to drop a tight five?

I'll call the Hoyt Cinemas. Yeah, call Hoyt so we can make a video for them. Okay, this is a weird one. I am really sick of my Spotify. Like your algorithm playlist sort of thing? So I think it depends on how you my Spotify. Like your algorithm, playlist sort of thing? So I think it depends on how you use Spotify, but I, and I don't think this is a popular opinion,

but I just like the stuff that I like, as in heart it on Spotify. Yeah, you've got a liked songs playlist? Yes, yep. And then I just hit shuffle in liked songs. I'm not a playlist builder. Yeah. I think I know what you're saying because sometimes you like songs and Spotify is like, oh, if you like this, you'll probably like that. And I'm like, don't tell me what I like.

Well, listening to new music gives me anxiety. Yeah, no, that's not for me. Yeah, so you know how- Unless you're on Kiss when you can hear the latest fresh to the Kiss playlist at 350s. But you know how some people are like, oh, I always put on my Daily Discover. No.

No. No, get it away from me. So my liked music- What's in your liked music? Well, there's so much stuff in there because I've been building it for 10 years or however long I've had Spotify. So there is stuff in there that I don't really align with anymore and it will pop up and I'll just hit next

and I'm like I should probably unlike that but I've just never done it. But I'm getting to this point where I've just got this full liked songs playlist and I'm thinking about just like getting rid of it and starting again. Ten years you've put into this. I know. But it's not curated. It's literally just me being like, oh, I've heard that song on TikTok,

heard that song on the radio, hitting like and popping it in the playlist and the randomest shit comes up. And I think that maybe I should just start again. Is it easier to literally start a new account or do you have to go back in and delete 10 years' worth of songs? Oh, that would be hard because do you have to unlike all of them? That would take forever. The other thing is what if I can't find something that at one point

in my life I was like, that's such a great song. And, you know, when you're flicking through Spotify and a great song comes on, you're like, oh, I haven't heard this in ages. That happened. I walked past a cafe and the music was pumping and I was like, oh. What song was it? Oh, I'm sorry.

I think it was like a rudimental. Oh. I like rudimental. It is time to start the show. I'm not giving in. What has happened? I'm not giving in. That rud happened? I'm giving in. That Rudimental song.

That's what it was. Was it actually that song? Do you know what's a really good Rudimental song? The one with Ed Sheeran. It was with Emily Sandé, the one I think I heard. I'm free. Oh, I know the one you're thinking of, Bloodstone. No, that's Guy Sebastian.

What's the song? Ed Sheeran and Rudimental. Is it Bloodstone? No, that's Guy Sebastian. What's the song? Ed Sheeran and Rudimental. Is it Bloodstone? No, that is Guy Sebastian. Because there's more in this bloodstone. Oh, no, I'm not afraid to bleed. I'll work my head through the bone. No, what is the song?

It's Ed Sheeran and Rudimental. I'm looking it up now. I don't want you to play it because I want to remember it, but I can't remember what it is. Do you know that people are going to be listening? Lay it all on me. Lay it all, lay it all, lay it all on me. Lay it all on me.

You can lay it all, lay it all on me. Lay it all. Hi, this is rudimental. Don't kiss. You've got a friend in me Non-stop Kiss 101.1 All alone as you look through the door

Nothing left to see This is a good song If it hurts and you can't take no more Lay it on me We're actually going to do a new episode every week Called Tony and Ryan try and remember the names of songs. The worst thing about that is that I know that there would have been people listening just then being like...

Screaming. It's fucking lay it all on me! It's lay it on me. These guys are idiots. Anyway, I bet you Ed Sheeran was listening and he was like, guys, you don't bloody know the name of my song. Anyway, so I'm really sure that's what. What country do you think Ed Sheeran's from?

That sounded like Ed Sheeran. Go. You guys can't remember the name of my song. No, that's. You don't think that sounds like it? That is the girl from Love Island who you hate. Oh, I hate Love Island. They all sound the same.

Anyway, it doesn't matter. But what I'm stressed about is that I get a lot of anxiety from listening to all my liked songs smushed together, but I also am getting anxiety about deleting them all and starting again. I would really like to hear if you have deleted all of your Spotify and started again. Let me know how it went.

Okay, here's my unqualified opinion. Okay, yes. If you're anxious about listening to new music. Yep. If you're anxious about listening to new music. Yep. If you're anxious about listening to old music. Yep. Maybe it's not the music. Maybe you just have anxiety.

Yeah, that's a really good point. Because I've thought about doing that with my. Clothes. Yep. No, okay. That's not what you're going to say. No, but that is a good one. Have you ever thought about just like throwing out everything

in your wardrobe and going, I'm fricking starting this again? Can I tell you something awful? Yes. Once, I'm not going to say I was hoping for a fire. Oh, my God. Did you have really good insurance? We probably should have organised that before. I did think if I had to just like start my wardrobe again,

that would just be like how nice just to go blank slate, start with some staples because I've got a lot of items that I'm just really regretting. Yeah, but imagine if like Tan France from Queer Eye for the straight guy or this chick that I follow on Instagram, her name's Style by Sally. She's like this Melbourne stylist who, you know, she just like, she does such a great job. People would know who I'm talking about. She's amazing. Imagine stylist who, you know, she just like, she does such a great job. People would know who I'm talking about.

She's amazing. Imagine just getting one of those people to just like really overhaul all your shit. Do you want that? Yeah, I do want that. Do you want me to call Sally? No, it's so expensive. Have you ever, oh, my God, have you ever looked at getting a stylist?

You should. No. I'm like, you know I just wear crappy T-shirts and the same pair of jeans every day. Do you think I've ever looked into getting these styles? I'm asking because I think you should. No. But have you ever looked?

It is so expensive and rightfully so. Really? They pull lots of very specific items. Yeah. By no means. Don't fricking cancel me. I'm not saying it's too much money. I'm just saying it's a lot of money.

Too late. You've been cancelled, babe. No. Especially in those shoes. So styled by Sally. To go with her, Sally McKinnon, it's like $700 or $800. Plus the clothes. And then you have to buy all the clothes.

So did you think, oh, this jacket would be great? And you go, yeah, I'll get that one. And then they're like, yeah, you have to buy that. Yeah, you have to buy it. Oh. Is that not what this is? What are you doing? Literally, it's not like going shopping with your mum.

It's like, I love that. And she's like, okay, sweetheart, like I'll get you that. Yeah, no, you have to buy all the clothes yourself. I reckon I should be a stylist but for really bad drinks for house parties. So you pay me and I come to the Bottle-O with you and I go, oh, see those Buccado shots? I love a Buccado shot. You should get that.

You get that one. See those Mississippi mudslides? Yeah. Get a few of those. Get a few of those. I don't pay for the drinks. The girls will love those. But I just go shopping with you and advise you on what to get.

You're a consultant. Thank you. That's a good idea. Yeah. I'll look into that. If anybody's interested in taking up those services, let us know in the Facebook group or TikTok or Instagram. Yep, the Bottle-O shop out the front of the Aldi in Abbotsford.

Do you know that bottle on the side? I know it well. Liquorland. Don't have to tell me twice. Like Liquorland. Sorry, I thought that's what you meant. No. Oh, I was doing like a sex joke.

I know that now, yes. I'm sorry. You should be. No, that's not what I meant at all. I meant Liquorland like a sex joke. I know that now, yes. I'm sorry. You should be. No, that's not what I meant at all. I meant Liquorland, like the bottle store. Like Liquorland. No, no, I get it. No.

No, no. No. So should I delete my Spotify or not? Please. Just do anything. Anything to get out of this. Play the ad music thing with Jane, the narc voiceover playing. Thank you.

Hey, you're listening to Tony and Ryan. Yeah. All right, thank you very much for listening to Tony and Ryan. We really appreciate it. We actually can't believe it. That people are listening? I love it. It's great.

I love it too. It makes me feel really special that people are taking time out of their day to listen to us ramble on. And lots of people have said, oh, you guys made my day. I saw this video and it's made my day. Like, that makes our day. It really does. It's lame and cheesy and how all influencers are like,

I'm so hashtag blessed, grateful. We actually are very thankful. Yeah, we're frothing it. We're frothing it. If you're listening to us on a podcast app now, some apps say follow, some say subscribe. If you could just go and tap that and the thing. Oh, tap that all on the floor, tap that.

Put that on your Spotify. Yeah, I'll make sure I add that one. Also, if you're listening on Apple Podcasts, you could drop us a little cheeky review or a little rating if you like. If you leave a pun in your written review on Apple Podcasts, I'll read out the best funny ones. So leave a pun in your little descriptor. And because this podcast is a very big deal,

so you're going to want to be read out. Get up in there. Yeah. All right. Now, obviously from previous experience, anytime I say a show is good, Tony assumes it's shit. Have you seen The White Lotus? Watch the trailer.

The trailer doesn't do it justice. Oh, well, the trailer was shocking. So you're right. Even if it's any percent good. So we were going to hear something a bit shameful, though. We were like, should we watch The White Lotus? Everyone's talking about it. Todd's and I are sitting on the couch, and we are just such pricks about TV. We're like, oh, that's not good enough for us. Yeah, you are better than everyone else. Yeah, we were like, should we watch The White Lotus? Everyone's talking about it. Torz and I are sitting on the couch and we are just such pricks about TV.

We're like, oh, that's not good enough for us. Yeah, you are better than everyone else. Yeah, we are. And we're sitting there and I was like, let's watch the trailer, see what it looks like. We both went, we're not watching that. So I've watched the whole thing and then I watched the trailer and after watching the trailer I was like, oh, jeez,

they haven't really. You know what we watched instead? What? The original Spider-Man trilogy. With? Tobey Maguire. You didn't. Yeah.

That's what we watched instead. What? Yeah. How are we eligible for anything? No, no, no. Well, that's what we watched instead. So if you're thinking about watching old school Spider-Man, it hasn't aged very well.

Really? Someone said that about Grease in the group, that it's very problematic when you watch it back. It's a bit like Friends, to be quite honest with you. Yeah, right. That's a shame. That is the third freaking time I've talked about Friends in this podcast after we said liking Friends isn't a personality.

Well, apparently it is, folks. I hate myself. Anyway, yes, talk about The White Lotus. The White Lotus is a hotel on a Hawaiian island. Okay. And it's a drama, comedy and, yes, Tony, I have a question. You've got your hand raised.

Is this your recommender? Is this a, are you recommending this or are you talking about this? I would just like to get that out in the open first. I'm nervous because if I recommend it and you hate it, then my track record's crap anyway. Don't even worry about it. I'm not going to watch it. We're in lockdown. There's not a lot else to do. I'm going to say it's crap anyway. Don't even worry about it. I'm not going to watch it. We're in lockdown.

There's not a lot else to do. I'm going to say it's dark comedy. Okay. It's very funny, but it's also quite fascinating because you learn a lot of the backstories of the characters and there's a bit of a mystery. But actually, I'll tell you what happens in the first scene. Okay. You know that someone dies.

But who is it? It's basically the staff at this hotel and all the guests there are like rich assholes. And so there's a lot of the kind of underlying tones about how rich people think they're better than everyone and have a bit of expectations. We do. And it must be nice for you, Tony.

But I think anyone who works in hospo or retail will watch it and be like, oh, I get it. Yeah. What was your I just finished high school, I'm going to uni sort of job? I worked at Coles. You worked at Coles? Yeah, in the deli. Oh, you would be.

Oh, what does that mean, love mate? No, because I don't know why I can just picture you in the cap. The hat, yeah. And like the hairnet. Yep. Yeah, I worked in the Coles deli. And at every Coles Deli. And at every Coles, there is like a cool department and it's not the same in every Coles.

Really? Yeah, so there's like a whole thing. So at my Coles, Coles Maddington. Represent. In Perth. It was the deli. That was like the cool. The cool spot.

The cool department. I thought it was the nerdy one. Oh, well, like if you worked like on the checkouts, That was like the cool. The cool spot. The cool department. What was the nerdy one? Oh, well, like if you worked like on the checkouts, like that wasn't cool. Really? Well, that's what I reckon. And so you're saying at different Coles there's different areas? Oh, yeah.

So I've got a friend who worked at Woolworths and he was saying that the cool area at their store is the checkouts. Like if you work at the checkouts, you're like cool and awesome or whatever, but at our store it happened to be the deli. If I worked at a Coleslaw Woolies, I would 100% be on the deli. Well, the deli was really fun because you could mess around and there was like heaps of work to do so you were always busy. You'd chat to people, you'd chat to each other.

You'd chat to each other and then like you would always have to stay really late to like clean the deli out and stuff. Yeah. So you would just get to get all wet and soapy and muck around. Yeah, it was awesome. Jeez, that sounds like a phone party at college all of a sudden. Yeah, that's... Did you ever make out with anyone that you worked with at Coles?

No. A little bit? No. You sure? Yep. Was there one that you wanted to? You've got a look on your face that says there's the one that got away. Not the one that got away.

The one that is now gay. No, so I worked at Coles with a lot of people that I went to school with. Right. And my best friend at the time when I was working there, Alex, who I absolutely love, and he's gay now.

He's in a very, very happy relationship. Definitely would have taken him on. Really? Oh, yeah. Well, it turns out he would not have taken you on. For a good reason. History would show that, no. I should probably cut that out.

What if he listens? Hi, Alex. You just gave him a compliment. Yeah, yeah, and he knows that as well. Was that awkward when you told him? Well, no, I'd never really said it, but it was just kind of like a thing. Well, you said it now. I'll pass this episode on.

Okay, great. Doesn't it feel nice just to say that, though? I had a crush on you. We used to, like, hammer-meet at each other in the deli. Yeah. We also, like, we would party together every weekend and I would stay at his house. So we'd, like, you know, we spent so much time together.

We were, like, best friends. We're still good friends now. Well, and he always assumed that you were just friends. Yeah. Or maybe he knew that I liked him and he was like, fuck no. Rather take a dick? Yeah. Fair enough.

Me too. All right. Here's my theory after watching White Lotus. Yeah. Because I used to work in what was called a 4MU1 hotel. You worked at a hotel? Yeah, like the really cheap motel, like the cheapest of the cheap.

I can't imagine you working in a hotel. Why not? Did you wear a little bellboy costume with a little hat and stuff? Well, I worked at the Victoria Hotel. No, but I wore like a button-up shirt and a collar and I used to go and help people with their car or take their bags up to the room or if a little old lady needed some help with something, I'd like to go and help her out.

I can't imagine that at all. And then I was like the hotel manager overnight. So I used to do like night shifts and like deal with stuff. Did you get paid pretty well to work overnight and stuff? Oh. How old would you have been? Oh, 18, 19. And then when I was 20, I was the night auditor at Accor.

But what was good because it was a dodgy hotel, not dodgy, I just mean like a bit less formal, that if we had a party in the city because I was in the outer suburbs, we would just like get a, as long as they weren't sold out, we would just book a few rooms for us and the friends would have pre-drinks, go back there, stay the night. We had I think 16 people in a room one night after a few phone parties at Melbourne Uni and stuff like that. So, yeah, like I mean I didn't get paid well,

but it was worth it for the benefits. That is so cool. But here's my theory. So, yeah, like I mean I didn't get paid well, but it was worth it for the benefits. That is so cool. But here's my theory. Okay, yes. I reckon when everyone finishes high school, they should have to do one year of either hospo or retail. I totally agree. And then they can move on with their life because anyone who's worked

in hospo or retail knows that sometimes the F-Post machine is down. Yep. They understand that it's actually not your fault. You just work here. Yep. Oh, but yeah, but the store should do this, this and this. Hey, mate, I just come in on the weekend for six hours and I do the best I can and then

I leave. I don't own this place and I feel like everyone who's worked in hospital retail, they get it. I'm feeling it in my soul. So I checked into a hotel, oh, it would have been a year ago now, and the room wasn't ready. And you could see on her face, she was like, sorry, sir, like the room's not ready.

We can, you know, take your bags but we can't check you in for another hour. And I was like, no problems. Joel, don't worry about it. It's totally fine. And you could just see her, like her shoulder. The relief. The relief.

That you weren't going to go crazy at this woman. Because I know she just works here. She didn't decide, oh, you know what? I'm deliberately not going to clean that room on time just to piss Ryan off. Rich people, is that what they think? I think so. It's that entitlement, right? But never for the rest of my life will I go to some place and they go,

oh, sorry, the credit card machine's not working. I go, hey, I'll just go get some money from the ATM. Oh, the room's not ready? Hey, it's fine. I get it. I've worked here. You'll work some other place. You'll not be an arsehole because you've worked here.

If you've worked in a hospo or you've worked in customer service, you've just got a level of empathy that other people who have and don't have. Whilst I agree with you 100%, you're also a really nice guy. Some people just don't like that. Really? So I know someone who did work in retail for quite a number of years but is still that person.

I would like to speak to the manager. It is someone I know. In a car anyway or I'm just being a dick because I've got nothing better to do today? Yep, just like always grumpy. This person would always say, yep, yep, yep, like not good enough. I would like to talk to someone. I want a better this.

I want a better that. And they worked at a certain shop for many years through uni. Yep, and still didn't rub off on them. And they're still just like an arse to people in retail. That's a real shame. Restaurants and stuff. So I feel like you're either one of those people that takes that on or you're not.

But I do appreciate the theory because I agree. You appreciate the theory? I just disagree wholeheartedly. Thanks for listening to the episode. Go watch The White Lotus. Have a great day, everyone. I wasn't trying to derail you. Is this a conversation or should I just agree?

Would you prefer I just agree? Maybe that's what the retail people should say. Sorry, sir, do you just want me to agree with you? Yeah, because fine, take the bloody inflatable pool. Take it for free. We work at Clark Rubber now. Yeah, how was that the first item I thought of? You're working at a hotel.

You're like, yes, sir, please just take the inflatable pool. All right, before we head out of here, just want to talk about some things we love to see. You actually can't listen to this music without doing a little dance. It's really happy and nice, isn't it? Yeah. Okay, so you love to see it. Yep. I would

implore everybody listening to follow the hashtag. You know how on Instagram you can follow hashtags and they come up in your news feed? Follow the hashtag dog grooming. Really? Yep. I've done it for about three months and it is the best thing I've ever done.

Like just really satisfying to watch? It's so satisfying. So they show these, like, shaggy, cute little dogs, and then they show them, like, clipping their little dog beards and stuff, and then they're all clean and cute at the end. So it's a hashtag dog grooming. Hashtag dog grooming.

Follow it on Instagram. I will actually froth that. Thank you so much. That's a great rep. It's actually so good. You won't regret it. Yeah, okay. All right, all right.

Can I make my You'll Love To See It into something I'd like to see? Ooh. We haven't done that before, but sure. I mean, it's Tony and Ryan. We get to pick. Tell you something I'd love to see in the future? Yep. The guy from Australia Post actually rock up,

knock on the door and offer me my parcel. Ah! Hey, guys, I dropped by and you weren't home. No, it's a lockdown. Everyone's home. We're home the whole time. Everyone's home. Not only did you not come today,

now I'm questioning every single other time you said you'd come. That's what I'd love to see. I totally agree. Damn you, Australia Post. Hashtag dog grooming. See you next week. Bye.