Toni and Ryan - Ryan's karma

Episode Date: March 21, 2022

Finally Ryan get's his comeuppance for letting his phone go flat all the fucking time - and we chat about things you can say in SPACE and also in the bedroom. Love ya! T x Check out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

As women, our life stages come with unique risk factors, like when our estrogen levels drop during menopause, causing the risk of heart disease to go up. Know your risks. Visit heartandstroke.ca. Hello? Hello, is that Caressa? Oh, my gosh. Yes, hello.

Hi. We wanted to know if you wouldn't mind approving this podcast. Of course I'll approve the podcast. Oh, my God. She's from California, so you know that she's hot. Hot girl. Hot girl approving the podcast. What are you up to?

Are you in the car? Where are you going? What's happening? Oh, my gosh, yes, I am in the car. I'm headed to a yoga class right now. Of course you are. Okay, righto. Carry on.

And then go and get a green juice. Oh, definitely not. Definitely getting a beer straight after. Oh, balance. Balance. Hi, this is Caressa from Oregon Oregon and I approve this podcast. Welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast. Happy Tuesday.

Happy Tuesday. Have you seen the new Batman movie? I feel like it's the biggest movie that's come out recently because, Tony, you've indulged. Went and watched it last week, yep. Should I go? Oh, yeah, it's very good. And you said, though, and we'll get to this, something that people who go to the cinema experience this, something went wrong.

I asked about the movie experience and you went, oh. Yeah. I tried to treat myself. It went a bit awry and, yeah, we'll talk about it in a bit. Do other countries have gold glass or is that like an Australian thing? I assume that most places would have like a version. A version of it? A version, yeah.

Because I feel like Australian, the theatre business, it's kind of gone, it's luxe or nothing. There's not as many regular cinemas as there used to be. Is there? Most of them are going fancy because it's like, well, if they're not fancy, you just stay at home. But Lux is only like half of the cinema. Lux or Gold Class is only like the back half of the cinema.

The front half is like normal seats. Oh, but there's some. Oh, you can't fucking see that from all the way at the back, can you, mate? Bloody hell. It's a tough life, guys. It's a tough life. But first, welcome to the show.

People often find us from the things you can say in the bedroom, TikToks and Instagram. Yes. And this week, oh, I forgot their name. Oh, well, I knew that you would forget. So it's actually Lucy Williams. Oh, well, thank you, Lucy Williams. Appreciate that.

So she pitched this idea and we absolutely ran with it because we are fucking running out of ideas quicker than we can admit to. Hey, hey. This segment will go forever. Yeah, we just need to, I think we've done. Send your ideas through. I think we've done Jim 15 times. So this is things that you can say in outer space

and also in the bedroom. I come from planet Earth. I come in peace. Oh, that's his name. Peace Brosnan. Yeah, 007 out of 10. Pretty good. Fuck off to a flyer.

Very good. This is a special shout-out to Tanya on Patreon. She sent one. Oh, I'm about to blast off. Which I thought was a bit sexy. Tanya, my goodness. Five, four, three, two, one. Blast off! Is that what you sound like when you're...

Is that what Torbs doesn't sound like? In the boudoir. Is that not normal? Okay. Is that not normal? No, I appreciate the showmanship. Thank you. I love it.

It's just a graphic insight into what it might be like at your house on a Sunday afternoon. You're welcome any time. Oh. Except Sunday afternoons, obviously. Oh, you'll be seeing stars after this. So I wrote that and then, you know, like on a cartoon, if someone got, like, donked on the head and then, like,

the stars and the birds would go. Yeah. You get knocked out during the. I wrote it and then I was like, no one think about that too much. Is that a bit aggressive or? Like the. Oh, doll, you better put this on. You might need some oxygen.

Helmet on your helmet. Helmet. Helmet on your helmet. Speaking of helmets, I'm now featured on a website called Hoodie Your Helmets slash Ryan John. What's that? Is that about whether you're circumcised? Is it? Yeah.

Is it actually? Yeah. And you're on the website? Don't worry about it. I'm also on the website? Don't worry about it. I'm also on a website called He Got Fat where it's like gay boys who are into like chunky lads that used to be like jocks. And you're on there? Yeah.

Oh, my love. That's not nice for you to be objectified in that way. I'm really sorry. Well, I thought that at first. You're not here for people's consumption. That's fucked. Well, that way. I'm really sorry. Well, I thought that at first... You're not here for people's consumption. That's fucked. Well, I disagree. I'm here for people's consumption.

At first, I thought it was an insult, but then I read the comments and it's like, guys who are into that? Oh, well, if they're positive, then fucking, yeah, sign me up. I'll go premium. I went from 80 to zero to back to 100 pretty quick, so I was like, yeah, no, yeah. You're like, I can put on more weight if that's what people want. Tell me how many hot dogs, bro.

I'll put them in. Yeah, and then you'll eat as well. Things you can say in outer space and also in the bedroom. Rocket ship. More like cockat ship. Ooh. Gee, no one got to see the lick of the lips and the wink of the eye. I felt sexy when I was saying that.

You looked sexy when I was saying that. You looked sexy when you were saying that. Thank you. Thank you. You won't need to call me Neil Armstrong because I never fake it. But I'm always Neil-an. It comes out faster than I can. Immediately, no. It's already lost.

Oh, a lot of debris. Space junk, I think they call it. Space junk, I think they call it. Ooh, I thought Saturn was going to be the only rings I saw tonight. Oh! That is very funny. Apollo 13. Let's try Apollo 69. Dinner for two.

Are they up to that yet? We will be. Stop winking at me. I get into the zone. It feels right. Yeah, it does feel right. You're a method actor and I've always liked that about you. Yeah, I am a meth head actor. It feels right. Yeah, it does feel right. You're a meth head actor and I've always liked that about you. Yeah, I am a meth head actor.

You're right. It looks so small from back here. Just two little planets. And a slightly bigger planet in front of two smaller planets behind. Poor Bridget. Houston, we have a problem. You were going to say that, weren't you? Of course I was.

Yeah. Very good. Very good. I'm going to get in that dick in my mouth. Houston, no fucking problem here, I'll only tell you. What are you doing tonight? I'm getting a dick in my arse. Yeah, I'm getting fucked, what are you doing?

I didn't expect to visit Uranus this evening. It is lovely this time of year. Oh, that was out of this world. That is nice. Yeah. Imagine that you're, like, laying there after or putting your pants back on in a park or whatever and, like, you know, she goes, oh, that was out of this world. That would feel good.

That would feel good. That would feel good. That would feel really good. That would feel good. I bet it would have felt good as well. Well, surely people aren't throwing out compliments like that if they don't mean it, right? Or maybe they are. I feel like people would.

It's like faking an orgasm, isn't it? Yeah, that's why their nickname is Neil Armstrong. Did you miss that gag before? Huh? Because they fake the moon landing. That's why it was like. Oh, I did kneel like on my knees. Yeah.

It's just where I'm most at home. On all fours. Tony. Oh, no, you go. No, after you. Sorry. I'm sick of coming first. You go.

All right. We are going to have to back this in very carefully. Oh, look at that moon. Remember when mooning people was a thing? Bring those days back. Moon people out of a car or whatever. Oh, look at this arse. I'll give him the moon.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Fuck. What a crazy time to be alive. It's a great view from up here. I can confirm that both planet Earth and that ass are not flat. That's sexy. Thank you.

That's a sexy thing to say. Yeah. Yeah. Unless you're a Flat earther Then you're like What's he fucking talking about She does have a booty Yeah

She's got an ass But the earth's flat I've got the science To back it up and everything I've got Google I've Googled it Are we a flat earthing podcast Absolutely not

The earth is fucking round Unless you want to Be part of the Patreon, then the earth's whatever you fucking want. Yeah, we've got a flat earthing tier. Eight grand a year. It's $16,000 a month. Okay, imagine we're in a spaceship.

And there's like... People, people. But not actually a spaceship, but, you know, like the space control. What do they call those floating things that just live up there? Like a space station? Yes. Yeah. All right.

So imagine we're in a space station. So have I got like a suit on? Yeah, we're both dressed as astronauts. Okay. And then you walk into the room. Okay. Okay. All right.

Oh, does anyone want a coffee? This is me walking into the room. Oh, you don't need me to act for this? This is your silent role? Okay. Not familiar with the silent role, but I'll take it. I love that you're like, I don't know the scene, but I'll just begin the dialogue.

I am always willing to open my mouth, and that is also one. I do not deny that. I know you very well, and I can confirm that this is true. Tony, when you enter the room, that asteroid's not the only thing that's solid rock. Asteroid? I do have, I was going to say I have a confession, but this is not a KO ad nor a chat about the towel.

Oh, my God. We've already said we have to stop mentioning the towel. I have gotten on my high horse for the last few weeks and I actually enjoy people getting angry about my low phone battery. It triggers people to no end. And because I know this is a bit of a jerk thing, but when people see that I've got 6% battery and they get really triggered by it, I've found it a bit funny.

You know that that makes you like literally a sociopath though. Oh, but they're just, because for me it's just, it's not good or bad, it's just so insignificant. But it's not insignificant though because you could find yourself in a pickle if your phone was flat and you needed it. See, here's an example of someone getting flapped. Usually unflappable. So the other day Tony and I are filming a video with scooters

because we're now scootfluencers, by the way. We've sold ourselves to the scooter community and used our code to buy a scooter. Do we get a code? I think so, yeah. Oh, fuck yeah. That's awesome. So basically, Tony and I have to film this stuff on some scooters

and we're filming on my phone. At like a public park. And my phone runs out of battery. So we caught up this day only to film. Like it was like we are catching up and this is what we're doing. We're filming this video. So like you knew that you would need your phone. I tried about six minutes before I left the house.

I realised I was low so I plugged it into charge. You get a little six-minute zap. Got it from, barely made a dent. So my phone runs out of battery and Tony, I was going to say a top of her high horse, but of a top of her ignited electric scooter, was like, oh, well, look what karma's come back around. Have a look at this.

And I was like, that's fine. We'll use Tony's phone. It was a bit annoying, bit annoying whatever how was that annoying i fucking let you use my phone it was annoying that my phone ran out of battery it wasn't but again we used yours it wasn't a big deal so it was fine but i was just like mate like we're here to work and your fucking phone's gone flat like that is that ideal no no it's not so because we were filming we put the scooters onto like child's mode yeah because the full speed was then like five kilometres per hour. So when we're filming, it's easier when you're going slower. Yeah.

And because then we could like both be going at the same speed and stuff. Yeah. So and you adjust this via the app on your phone. Yeah. When we finished filming, we said goodbye to each other and I went to ride the scooter home and my phone, the scooter, was in child's mode. Yep.

The phone was dead so I couldn't change it. Yep. So instead of going home at 25 kilometres per hour, I had to go home at five. Yep. Five kilometres per hour. Think about if you went for a walk for an hour, how far you'd get.

Probably more than five kilometres. Oh, that's such a good way of thinking. Have you just worked out what that measurement means? Hang on, maths question. Tony, if you walked for an hour and you got seven kilometres from where you started, what speed were you walking at? Seven kilometres an hour. I didn't expect this to shock you.

I've just never thought about it that way. The title of the metric kind of gives it away. Tells you what it is. It's good when what's on the label. So anyway, I'm forced to ride home. Good video. So because my phone battery died I couldn't change the scooter and I had to ride my scooter home at five kilometres per hour, which is so slow.

Especially because, like, there's a lot of traffic around so you're in the bike lane like a little dork. And I'm trying to act cool because on a scooter it's a bit like, oh, it can be a bit awkward anyway. I love to see this There is down the road from my house like an aged living, like older people kind of retirement living kind of place

Yeah An old man ran past me on the scooter So I'm on the scooter at full speed going 5k's on child's mode and this 80 year old going for a jog ran past me. Oh, my God.

I wanted to die. It would have been faster to just carry the thing and walk probably. Yeah. Yeah, and this old guy is like, oh, these young kids with their technology and just scoot. Or anybody being like, God, those electric scooters are so dangerous. You could do more damage walking.

How dangerous is this? I fucking love to see that. I love that you got your comeuppance for your fucking phone being flat. And it also took me 15 hours to get home. So how does that make you feel? Like I would like to know, has there been a lesson learned here? Does it make you feel like you want to buy a battery pack for your phone or...?

I think just leaving the house with charge in it. Yeah, but also having the foresight to being at home and going, that has 6%, what if I need to go out later? I'll just plug it in. But I never need to go out later. I don't like to leave the house. But it has happened and then it didn't... I regret not being ready for that day. Yeah. But just I don't want it low. I just don't get to leave the house. But it has happened and then it didn't. I regret not being ready for that day.

Yeah. But just I don't want it low. I just don't get around to charging it. So last Christmas we did Secret Santa and I bought you a tile because you're always losing your wallet and your phone and your keys. Yeah. And you said that's a fucking shit gift. Well, in theory I appreciated it.

Say it was a shit gift. It didn't work. I said, oh, it's out of range. I'm like, the point is if if it's not, like, yeah. I have redone your secret, Santa. Pulled your name back out and decided I was going to buy you a different gift. What are the chances?

Have you actually? And I bought you a power bank and an iPhone lightning charger that you can leave in your backpack at all times. Tiny. And you do have to keep the bank charged as well, so it is another part of the thing. Hang on, hang on a second. But.

When am I supposed to remember to charge the. As soon as you get home, just pop that on charge and then you've always got a full battery charged in your backpack. So, okay, I'm flapped right now. Good. I'm flapped because I've struggled to remember to keep one thing charged and now you're doubling the amount of things I need charged.

You're giving me work. Okay, well then give it back. No. Do you want the present or not? Yes. Did you just give me yours as a lol and then you're going to ask for it back? No, I bought this for you.

Then why has it got scratches on it? Yeah, it is mine. This is Caressa from Oregon and you're listening to Tony and Ryan. A massive thank you to a few of our newest champion tapas over at our Patreon, patreon.com slash Tony and Ryan, Jessie Johnson, Brooklyn Harnish, Kieran Harnish and Shannon Morgan. Don't know if you heard two Harnishes. Sounds like it must be a, you know, they're respecting... The boundaries. The boundaries of one per person.

Did you see Netflix are cracking down on sharing passwords? I did. So apparently, I don't know how they know. Do you have your own account or do you use somebody else's? Every setup is different. So, like, I'm pretty sure my mum and I share the same Stan account. Oh, yep. Bridget and I share Netflix, as does my old roommate, Redders.

I'm pretty sure. Do I have your Disney login? Yeah. Because I watched Only Murders in the Buildings. Disney Plus is great. It's really good. It's got lots of stuff on it. Yeah, and I've got Binge as well. And you got that from doing a video for them or something.

Yeah, and then KO, the sports one, I actually share with Taylor in Perth because we're in different time zones. We never watch it at the same time. Oh, that's good. That is good. But sign up in full, obviously. Please. Please respect creators.

Yeah. Oh, sorry. I was about to say, then I'm like, this is your thing. No, you can. No, you go. What would you like to say? So my name's Tony and I was at the cinema the other day. Hey, Tony, please, what happened at the cinema the other day?

All right, so we kind of touched on it earlier. Is this going to piss me off? I feel like I've been attacked and angered this episode. I think it probably will piss you off. But anyway, we kind of touched on it before, but Torbs and I went and saw Batman last weekend. So we had a long weekend. So I was like, oh, it'll be great to go and do something a bit different.

And I really wanted to watch Batman because I'm a big Robert Pattinson fan because I love Twilight. Yep. As is a pretty common theme on this podcast, most people will know that I don't love long movies. No. In fact, we've often discussed if a movie is more than 90 minutes, it may take you three or four sittings to get through.

Or I just need to know that I can get up and go to the bathroom or get up and make myself another coffee or, you know, have an Instagram break or whatever. So how long was Batman? Batman is three hours. That's a lot. That's a lot. That's a long fuck. Like even people that like long movies, three hours is a big stint to sit down and fucking watch a movie.

That's the whole day. That's the afternoon. It's a commitment. Yeah. But it's also like you can't go and start a three-hour movie at 8pm. Oh, God, no. I've got work the next day, mate. Yeah, but you just...

I've got places to be. You'd fall asleep driving home. Like, you just can't do it. Hang on, so if it starts at 8, which is a stereotypical, like, time... A normal movie time, yeah. Because if you were doing, like, a date night and say you went and had dinner and then went and watched a movie... So it'd be 8, there's all the previews first.

You wouldn't get out of there before midnight. No. And then you've got to drive home, like, depending on how far away you are, whatever. No. Anyway, so there was a there before midnight. No. And then you've got to drive home, like, depending on how far away you are, whatever. No. Anyway, so there was a session at 5.45 and I was like, oh, great, we'll go and do that. Oh, it's three hours.

Do I really want to commit? And I thought, treat yourself. Treat yourself. We're going to go and we're going to go to Lux. Lux, the fancy place. The fancy cinema. I reckon if you're going to pay the extra, because you don't pay to watch the movie by the minute.

No. They're all the same price. So if you're going to spend three hours someplace, you might spend the money on that one. Yeah, and I was like, well, if I fall asleep in a comfy chair, it's better than a fucking uncomfortable chair. Right. I want to have a good sleep.

I want to feel refreshed. If I fall asleep, I want to fall asleep reclined. I want to fall asleep in luxury. Anyway, so we've actually never been to Lux before. The last time I went to, it used to be called La Premiere. Do you remember? Geez, they were the days. Years ago.

Yeah. And I went with my mum. Right. Like, literally, not even taking the piss. She died eight years ago, so it would have been ten years ago. Since you've been to the movies. No, since I went to La Premiere. And it's not even called the same thing anymore.

Did you roll in and go, can I get the La Premiere? And they're like, are you joking? So I looked online. I'm like, how do you even book the ticket? Do you buy one nest or do you have to buy two tickets? When I've been the last time, you bought one ticket and one ticket was for two people. Like that's how fucking long a guy went.

Yeah, okay. Anyway, we were like, fucking treat yourself. We never go to the movies. I think the last thing we saw at the cinema was Toy Story 4, which came out like five years ago. We literally never fucking go to the cinema. Anyway, I don't have to justify this to you, but we never fucking go.

So I was pretty excited. We decided to go to Lux. Now, I know that you have been to Lux more recently. The fucking menu is insane. Yeah. So they've literally got like burgers, salad, pizza, charcuterie boards. I can't ever pronounce charcuterie boards.

I just give it a whack every time. I don't know if I've ever gotten it right, but it's always different every time I say it. The meats and the cheeses and the olives. And the drinks menu isn't like Coke or Sprite. It's like do you want a Negroni? Espresso, martini, all this stuff. Anyway, and I'm looking at it and I'm like,

I don't want to eat a burger in the cinema. In the dark. Yeah. I'm going to fucking walk out covered in tomato sauce. Like this is going to not be good. I don't want to eat a charcuterie board in the dark because how am I going to cut up my cheeses and how am I going to look at what I'm doing? I don't want to eat a salad in the movies because I'm not a fucking idiot

and I don't want to eat like chicken bits or anything because I feel like I'm just going to get all greasy and like it's just going to be a hot fucking mess. So how many things were left on the menu that you liked if you deleted all these options? Yeah, so I was like, I actually just want popcorn. Like, I just want popcorn and a drink. So the regular fare, standard fare of a cinema. But you're paying for luxe. Yeah. So what do you...

So you still get the nice seat and stuff. You've got a nice seat at home. Yeah, but Batman's not at home. Yeah, but Batman's not at home. Yeah, but neither is the charcuterie board or the wings or the dip. But I would eat that stuff at home because I could have the light on. Cocktail? Yeah, I'd make myself. We have a big bar cart at home, so we make cocktails at home. So why did you go to the cinema for?

Okay, because I wanted to see Batman. Batman was at the cinema. Anyway, so. If you were flying first class somewhere, would you go, oh, I'm flying first class, this is fantastic. But having said that, happy to sit down the back, don't want any special stuff. No, but I still.

Just buy the economy ticket. No, but I still wanted the nice seat and I wanted to, like, you know, have a bit of space. I didn't want to sit right next to someone either. Torbs isn't that bad. Because I hate it when people talk in the cinema. It drives me fucking nuts. Okay, note to. Because I hate it when people talk in the cinema. It drives me fucking nuts. Okay, note to self.

I hate it when people talk. Like talking at home because you're not bothering anybody else, but I'm like everybody's paid $100 to sit here. Don't fucking talk. Talk at home for free. So what did you do? Anyway, so we went to Lux and the people come over and they're like, oh, what can we get you?

We'll bring it to your seat. And we're like, oh, can we each get like a large like Pepsi or whatever and a big popcorn? And they were like, oh, yeah, yeah, okay. And then I was like, oh, and we'll grab a bag of Maltesers as well. Perfect. Classic cinema food. Classic cinema.

We are like waiting for the movie to start and we paid for it. And how fucking expensive is food at the cinema? It's... Robber. It's theft. Yeah. It's illegal. So we got two drinks, a popcorn and a Maltesers and it was like $35 or something.

For just the food. For just the food. And we'd already paid for the tickets, which was like 80 bucks. Anyway, so we're like, okay, when do you bring it in? They were like, oh, we can bring it in to the cinema at any point. And I was like, oh, do you want to bring it in like half an hour in? So I've like got something to look forward to because it's a three-hour fucking movie.

If our pad isn't getting it done. Because normally you'd go, oh, we'll start with some popcorn, an hour in, bring me the wings, and then maybe bring a dessert in the last thing or whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But because you're not ordering me any food, space out my popcorn. Yeah, because you bring like half of the big box of popcorn out first and then the other half of it later.

No, so we were like, can you bring it in like half an hour in? Yeah. And I didn't really know how to work, but they literally just like bring it to you. The movie's on. There's other people around you and they just like bring it to you. So half an hour into the movie, it's dark. Like people are like, you know, taking the film in.

It's all kind of going. Everyone's fucking quiet and like, you know, fucking glued to the screen. She comes down and she puts one drink on the table, another drink, puts the popcorn down and that's it. Where's the Maltesers? Mate, fucking million dollar question. I've probably paid $16 for this bag of Maltesers. You've paid $1 per Malteser.

Yep. And they're worth their fucking weight in gold at this point. I'm thinking I just want something sweet to break up this popcorn. How beautiful would that be? That's why I fucking ordered that. Salt and chocolate together. Oh, I mean, fucking come on my tits. Anyway, we're sitting there and I'm like maybe she'll bring,

maybe she's like, oh, a bit of a treat. I'll take him out in 15 minutes. Did you ask her? When she dropped off, she go, hey, where's the Maltesers? No. So did she come back? No. So did you push the button to?

No, because I didn't want to bother anybody because I hate it when people talk in the movie. You paid $1,000 for those Maltesers? Yeah. There's no charcuterie? No. There's no wings? No.

There's no sliders? No. The only thing you wanted? Was the Maltesers. And did you ask for them? No. I paid for them. They didn't come.

And like I said, I hate it when people talk in the movie. So I didn't want to press the thing and then go, oh, hey, sorry, you forgot my Maltesers. Then she goes, I don't think you paid for them. Then I go, no, I definitely did. Have you got their receipt? Yeah. Oh, let me just look at my UpBank account and show you that I paid for it.

Like how fucking annoying. Did you consider walking out to the bar and asking them there? No, because I didn't want to miss the movie. I'll pause it for you. Oh, sorry, everyone. Could you consider walking out to the bar and asking them there? No, because I didn't want to miss the movie. I'll pause it for you. Oh, sorry, everyone. Could you just hit pause? I haven't got my Maltesers. And they're like, this fat girl at the back needs her fucking food.

Tony doesn't have her chocolate. Stop the film. Ah, Pats, if you could just hold her right there for a second. Yeah, yeah, cut, cut, cut. So you didn't get them? So I didn't get them. So you spent $80 on tickets. You spent $30 to $5 on food. you didn't get them? So I didn't get them. So you spent $80 on tickets. Yeah.

You spent $30 to $5 on food. Yeah. You didn't get any food. The only thing that you actually wanted was the Maltesers and? I didn't get them. But I paid for them. And then, let's all think about this, this is half an hour into the movie. So then I spent two and a half fucking hours thinking,

I wonder if she's going to come with those Maltesers. You're supposed to be concentrating on the storyline of Robert Pattinson. Being the fucking Batman. Not, spoiler alert, not on the storyline of is she or is she not bringing Maltesers out. Yeah, and then I was thinking, fuck, I'm really fucked off they didn't bring them.

Then I was like, oh, it's not really a big deal. Like, it could happen. And then, like, so I'm like'm really fucked off I didn't bring them. And then I was like, oh, it's not really a big deal. Like, it could happen. And then, like, so I'm, like, warring with myself about whether I say something. It's almost worth you saying something not for the Maltesers, just to not have that fight with yourself. Just to actually not think about it. Did Torbs mention it? No.

Did you say to him, hey, Torbs, I don't think they brought the Maltesers? No. Well, he looked at me and I went, gave him this, like, puppy dog face, like the fucking Maltesers haven't come. And so obviously when you pulled that face, he was like, I'll go figure it out. He was like, that sucks. And then he's still watching Robert Pattinson be the Batman spoiler.

And then when we're walking out, I'm like, should I say something? Torbs was like, no, you can't say anything. That happened three hours ago. Like you can't walk into a restaurant and go, hey, I dined here last week and like something happened. Can't you? No. Two weeks ago.

Fuck off. I got takeaway pizza from Baby. Oh, beautiful. And I ordered a tiramisu. The tiramisu didn't arrive. So I sent an email. So was that just part of your order? Yep.

Yeah. So the pizza and everything rocked up and I emailed them and went, oh, hey, the tiramisu didn't come in. And she goes, oh, when you're next in, just mention it to the waitress and she'll get you some. No fucking way. You can't. Imagine having that conversation.

Oh, so three weeks ago we ordered a tiramisu takeaway and it didn't come and the person that we talked to said to mention it to you and she's like but no they would fucking laugh in your face well guess what they did did you ask them about it yeah and they're like oh what and i went sorry about it oh well you and i maybe we should just go out and get a tiramisu and some fucking maltesers and have a great time. It'd be cheaper to buy it from Coles anyway. Putting Maltesers into a tiramisu.

Not a bad idea. Good areas. We could try that. But, yeah, so it was more the social anxiety cost me, you know, $70,000 in Maltesers. I actually knew you were going to mention that because you know how you got me a phone charger? Yeah.

And you didn't get those Maltesers? Yeah. Guess what didn't get those Maltesers? Yeah. Guess what's in this bag? It's a paper bag from 7-Eleven. Nothing. There's nothing in there. I didn't know it happened. It just looked cool to give you a bag, didn't it?

It was an empty Powerade bottle and hair stuff. This is not a good friendship. Okay, sorry. I will get you those Maltesers. Oh, mate, if you fucking mortgage your house, you might be able to afford them again. I don't think you're going to La Premiere anytime soon. No, La Premiere, that's so funny.

I have to stand by this, and my you'll love to see it today is that your fucking phone went flat while we were recording. I have to back this in. I absolutely loved to see it. I got home, Tor went flat while we were recording. I have to back this in. I absolutely loved to see it. I got home, Torbz was like, how was the recording? And I went, yeah, right, his fucking phone went flat and I loved to see it. It was just great.

What did Torbz say when you told him that? He laughed. Great. He was like, oh, so what did you do? And I was like, well, mate, my phone was fucking fully charged, ready to go. So luckily someone's always prepared. Glad you guys had a great time.

And then we went and, you know, got heartbroken over the Maltesers. Did that ruin the evening? Yeah, it did. Yeah, it did. No, it didn't. We had a great time. The movie's great. But it was marred by the Maltesers.

Just go and ask. That's going to annoy me for a while. Yeah. I can't imagine how you're feeling. Mate. You know what I love to see? Tell me. And you're feeling. I might. You know what I love to say? Tell me. And you might have seen this comment.

Zach Tyler, who listens to that. Did you have that written down as well? Yeah, I do. A few weeks ago, I posted a comment, says Zach, about how listening to this podcast was helpful and relaxing before a job interview. Well, now that it's all official, I got the job. Yeah.

Get around it. Zach. Woo-hoo. I'm moving from Washington, D.C. to Las Vegas. Talk about a cultural change there. Fucking hell, yeah. For each new job, I'm glad we could put a smile on your face and laughing at Tony's misfortunes could help you forget about your own

and nail that job interview. You love to say that, don't you? Yeah, you do. I saw that post and it made me so happy. I can't believe that we're part of people's lives in that way. It's fucking cool. Not that we know anything specifically about Zach's career choices. When someone goes, I've got a job in Vegas, what do you assume?

I mean, surely you assume that they're going to be a showgirl. That's what I thought. Or a crew PA or something. Someone who knows not Zach Tyler's professional work, but his personal work. Yep. He'd be one of the great showgirls. Oh, okay. And I would have hired him.

Oh, Zach, can you let us know what you're actually doing and how it took you? I'm an accountant. And how it took you from DC to Vegas? That feels like a real lifestyle change. Yeah, it really does. Thank you so much for listening to the Tony and Ryden podcast. Yes, it's been an absolute pleasure.

You love to see it. Hopefully this helps you get a job. It's helped us get a job. And hopefully that you bring up that you didn't get your meow teasers at the movies.