Toni and Ryan - Teenage Emo Toni

Episode Date: October 8, 2023

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Welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast. My name is Ryan. This is Dr. Author Tony Lodge. And we are calling Jacob, who is in Leicester. Oh, like the cheese, Red Leicester cheese. There is Jacob. Hi, Jacob. Hello, how are you? It's Tony and Ryan. I'm good. How are you? Yeah, we're really good. Thank you.

Tony has a question about what your town's named after. Go on. Is it like the cheese, the red Leicester cheese? Yes, it is, apparently. So I'm told. I'm not from the area, but yeah, apparently so. Oh, my God, I'm a history buff. You are a history buff.

History Buff Lodge is what they'll call you. But, Jacob, will you approve today's podcast? Of course I will. Woo-hoo! Legend. Hey, it's Jacob from Leicester, and I approve this podcast. Yeah. Hey, it's Jacob from Leicester and I approve this podcast. Coming up today, ahead of our US trip in a few weeks,

there has been some, I wouldn't even say logistical issues, I would say some logistical realities have surfaced. Some realisations have happened. You know when you wake up and you go. That was Tony. Yeah, that was me. And it wasn't a dream. It was real life.

Yeah. That's okay. That's okay. I'm whimsical. It's summer. And I actually, off air chat, we had some like planning and booking things in like we might get some money to help us film some things and like hiring cars and whatever. And someone asked me a question earlier. I was like, oh, what should we do this? And I was like, we're going to actually have to wait until we have this chat on the show because that will impact.

What the outcome is. Oh, okay. All right. Well, I'm happy for logistics chat on air. You know that. Okay. But first. Live brainstorm.

Live brainstorm. But first, Life brainstorm. Life brainstorm. But first, more importantly, are you guilty of being an emo teen? Were you an emo teen? This feels like an anti-Tony episode, to be honest. No, it's really not. It's a celebration. It's a celebration of former Tony and it's extreme concerns for the near future Tony. Very near future.

But were you an emo teen? In TikTok land, it would be like, put a finger down. Oh, yep. But I've got a bunch of things here. So, do you want me to finger during this? I always want you to finger. Just tell me if these were a part of your day-to-day life. Because I'm on the record as being an alternative teen. Had a massive side fringe.

We'll get to that. Oh, okay. What colour was the side fringe? Did have black at one stage. Yeah. Number one, ratty converse shoes. Yeah. Guilty.

I had pink high tops that I like coloured in with a sharpie and then like I had one pink one and then my girlfriend Mel had black one. pink high tops that I, like, coloured in with a sharpie. And then, like, I had one pink one and then my girlfriend, Mel, had black ones. So, I had, like, one pink and one black. That's cool. Yeah. That's cool. That was cool back then.

Vans? Yep. I was a Vans. I was a Vans guy. Yeah. The crisscross checkered or whatever you call it? Oh, like the slide. The black and white slide.

The slip-on ones, yeah. No, I never had those. I had the, like, the classic Vans old school, I think that they're called. I was also a fan of Etnies back in the day. Did you ever have Etnies? Etnies. Isn't that, like, throwback of all time? Yeah.

Yeah, I had Etnies, yeah. The big puffy ones. What about Doc Martens? Big fan of Docs. I think I have one, two, three, four. I've got five pairs of Docs now. What the

fuck? Yeah, I've got three boots, one low tops and one sandals. And how often do you wear any of them? I wear the low top. I wear the sandals all through summer because they're those black chunky sandals I've got. And my boots, two of the boots I love but I need to spend a bit more time black chunky sandals I've got. And my boots, two of the boots I love, but I need to spend a bit more time breaking them in because I've,

they fucking hurt. They're like the platform ones. So they're really heavy. But the low top ones, you would have seen me wearing them heaps. They're the ones with little red hearts all over them. Oh, yeah. Yeah, they're Doc Martens. When I wore the Doc Martin, like, Chelsea boots that day.

Oh, they're so hot on you. They make me want to finger myself. Yeah. I haven't been able to wear them since because every time I wear them in. Yeah. You got to water protect them. Scotchgard, those bad boys. First of all, I actually do.

But thank you. Liquid eyeliner. Yeah, absolutely. Liquid eyeliner Yep Absolutely and like you would do the Crayola like the One on the bottom as well and like Smudge it out Dark lipstick Not at school

But as I got a bit older there was The brand anybody listening The brand is Lime Crime And they did like a liquid lime crime and they did like a liquid matte lipstick and they did like a every year they do like a halloween range and i had like the dark purple one isn't that halloween 12 months a year when you're an emo kid though it is yeah and i remember being like god i can't believe we don't do halloween australia so like like you know what i mean that's so so embarrassing. That is embarrassing. Number six.

Bangs or a fringe? Guilty. Yeah. True or false? You will not see a forehead in an emo club. Oh, no. Definitely not. Definitely not.

Yeah. I love my side fringe. I think it looks really cool. I still like them now whenever I see someone with one, I'm like, nice. I think it looks really cool. I still like them now. Whenever I see someone with one, I'm like, nice. I think that looks sick. So, this is probably the least, like, the last guy I'd expect. But Marcus, my mate.

Yeah. Used to have. Oh, no. I believe that. Really? Yeah, because he's a bit like. But, like, jet black, like, full fringe to the side and just, just like whenever a memory pops up on Facebook, he just gets- Slaughtered, yeah.

Fuck. I really regret that I deleted my MySpace in high school because I would love to go back and see all those shit photos that we put up. Anything from Hot Topic? Hot Topic wasn't really a thing in Australia as much. Because I don't even know what that is. So it's just like a shop. Is it like Dangerfield? Is it Dangerfield Energy?

Kind of like Dangerfield, yeah. I think there was, because there was Hot Topic and Mame in the city. Mame clothing was another thing. Right. But it was on the other side. Oh, my God, this is real Perth chat. Perth emo chat for anybody listening. A real niche podcast.

It is really niche all of a sudden. If you were a Perth emo in 2007. Six, seven. Yep. So, you would get off the train and you would get out. You know where now that green cactus is? Yep. It was on the other side of the train line, like on the North Bridge side.

But you'd have to walk all the way down to over the overpass then all the way back up and it would be like right there so it was a bit of a trip yeah um but like also like hanging out off your tree in perth i was just about to say off your tree because that was the same in melbourne there's the one in flinders street you're like oh i'm going to the city to hang with the cool kids i'll go to off your tree and like look at a bong that i'll never buy. Yeah. That was the thing. In Perth, there was two off your trays. Having more than one piercing or having spaces? Yeah.

Guilty. I had fleshies, yeah. How big were your fleshies? 12 mil. Is that a lot? It feels like a lot. Pretty big. I could fit in it.

Well, it's 10 mils a centimetre, right? Yeah. Yeah. So, just over a centimetre, like, big. How long did it take to, like, fill up? Fill up as in, like, close back down? Yeah. Oh, I mean, you can still see them a little bit.

Oh, yeah. And, like, I can't really wear heavy earrings because they, like, pull. That, like, really hurts. Yeah. Like, if they pull my ear. But I'm not really a jewellery person. But anyway, yep. And then I had, like, if they pull my ear. But I'm not really a jewellery person. But anyway, yep. And then I had, oh, I've had both lips.

I still have a scar on this side. Oh, so it's not acne? Both. It's that around it. There's a scar here. I had both noses. I also had, I used to have dermal anchors in my chest. What's that mean?

So, it's like a- You're pulling your shirt down and showing me your chest hair. So anchors in my chest. What's that mean? So, it's like- You'd be pulling your shirt down and showing me your chest. So, here on my chest, so, like, just out of my collarbones, I used to have, like, dermal piercings. So, it's like an L-shaped bar and it sits under your skin and it's, like, flush with your skin and it was just, like, a little, like, stone. Did the boys go wild for that shit? Yeah.

And what else did I have? Did you have a choker? I never had a choker really always really wanted one of those like plastic black plastic ones i never had one uh a tap and i was gonna read this and i don't know what it means a tattoo or a stick and poke um so a tattoo is obviously a tattoo stick and poke is is like a different version of tattooing. It's just like a different method. So, instead of like a tattoo gun, like it's a needle with ink in it and you do it manually. So, you can buy stick and poke kits online. I don't have any stick and pokes, but I do have tattoos.

And finally, you got a lot of tattoos. Not really that many. How many? Five? That's more than I mean, most people have none Yeah, that's true Finally, a studded or grommet belt

What's a grommet belt? I think it's like a brand of like Like, yeah, like the studded ones I never did a studded belt Really? Yeah, is that anticlimactic? You softy I know I feel really embarrassed No, I never did a studded belt. Really? Yeah, he's that anticlimactic. You softy. I know.

I feel really embarrassed. No, I never had a studded belt. You should feel embarrassed. I'm pretty sure I remember, like, asking mum and daddy if I could have one. And what'd they say? Well, they obviously said no because I didn't have one. What did they think of the rest of the attire? Were they just like, oh, she's just a teen doing her thing?

Just going through it. Yeah, I think so. She'll be back out the other side. My friend Shula, she had a belt that was like bullets all around it. Yeah. Yeah, I think so. She'll be back out the other side. My friend Shula, she had a belt that was like bullets all around it. That was a big thing for a while. That's hot. Was there like a sense of she's going through a moment, but like try not to do anything permanent?

You know what I mean? Because like, yeah, wear the clothes, do your hair, whatever, but like don't like get a face tat and then regret it in 10 years. Well, the tattoo on my shoulder I got when I was 16. Yeah. And, like, mum and dad took me. Yeah. Because I was like, I really want a tattoo.

And my dad is covered in tattoos. Right. And I was like, the next time you get one, can I come? And he was drunk. And he was like, yeah. And my mum was like, fuck, she's never going to forget that. Yeah. And then I didn't.

And then the next time he was going, I was like, can I go? And mum and dad were like, fuck, like, we stick to our word. Like, yep. Dad was on the dark rums and made some- Yeah, on the bundies. Signed some contracts. Yeah. And then mum was like, look, at least if I'm paying for it and I'm taking you, I will have a bit of a say.

And did she contribute to the editorial? What was the 16-year-old one? What was the first one? This one is the rose that I have on my shoulder. Yeah, okay. And it's got hate-breed lyrics under it. Again, very niche for anybody that's listening. Pretty funny.

Oh, my God. I'm really fucking killing myself here. Yeah, that's great. Anyway, yeah. Will you take Mabel to get her first tattoo? Fuck yeah, I will. How old do you think she needs to be? Oh, whenever she's ready.

I think she's ready. Pippa's got a tattoo, Mad Dog, on her ear. What's it say? Like 63951 or whatever dog number she is. I don't know. She's got a number. I don't know what they tattoo on. Her license number.

Yeah. Her social security. Yeah, she's got personalized plates. It's like Pippa Dog or something. Can I get a Personalised plate We'll pay extra I mean to be fair

A tattoo is the Personalised plates Of the body That's true That's what they say I have heard that Yeah I've heard that Many times

Great great great Hey it's Jacob from Leicester And you're listening To Tony and Ryan. All right, we're back. Before we get to the champion, we just had a really big chat about Tumblr. About Tumblr.

Tony was a Tumblr. I was a Tumblr girl. I loved it. I loved how, like, it was different to my space you know and i was a bit cooler and grungier more a bit underground it was like the uh the the real rough murkiness of the internet in the in the best way possible it was also like i don't care how many friends or comments i have it was like a different different energy on tumblr it was was like, you're just yourself. And I remember there would be like, I'm doing the 10-day challenge. And like every day you'd write like a different personal letter and they'd be, you know, like stuff like that.

Now I go on Pinterest like a mum. Yeah. And I type in like, converse aesthetic. I'm like, what show am I conversing with today? Like, it's really gone downhill. Yours is way better than mine. So, I'll get a notification from Pinterest. Yeah.

And it'll go, Ryan, you'll love the floor plans of these bathrooms. Oh, but that's not lame. That's good. Compared to some of those Tumblr stuff we were talking about offline before, before they made the switch. Well, yeah, they deleted the porn RIP Tumblr. It's just such a shame. I just want to look at hot girls with tattoos.

Same. And now I'm seeing fucking floor plans of bathrooms Yeah Pinterest isn't where you Yeah Yeah Okay What are we Champion shop

Champion Champion shop Massive shout out to a few of our champion tapas Over at our Patreon Josh Kaelin Sandoval Love you Kaelin Thank you

Iona Wilson Oh does she Tony owns a Hyundai No you don't It's an Audi Ignore me The car brand Wilson Ignore me Wilson. Oh, does she? Tony owns a Hyundai. No, you don't. It's an Audi. The car brand Wilson. Daniel Q. Good on you, Dan. And Katie Scott. Fucking love ya. Good on ya. Thanks, Katie Scott. It's just good to have you here. It really is.

So, because we're heading to the US in a few weeks, can't wait to meet a shitload of viewers. We're saying g'day to the USA. And Toronto. And Toronto. Toronto toronto toronto yeah you can't say toronto you have to say toronto i read that online we've been looking at like finnell actually done without he did too um he we've been looking at the map as in like oh if we're gonna do a meet and greet there and we're kind of like recording the podcast there is there a hotel kind of nearby and trying to do all the maths and look at the maps. Lots of logistics chat. Yeah.

So, it's pretty, I wouldn't say it's boring, but it's like, because we're travelling around so much, there's a lot of admin and a lot of logistics. Because, you know, if you're, like, going one place and, like, staying put. Yeah. You set up camp a bit more, but because we are moving around so much, it's like. But then it's fun admin.

It's like, where are we going for dinner? Totally. Where are the fun shops? Where's a cool breakfast place? Where's the beach? But now we're like, oh, do we catch the fucking early train or the bus at four and then we get there at six? Yeah.

Yeah. Anyway, so we're looking around New York trying to figure out where we're going to like be and do stuff. Leave our bags. And I think we've said before that we're going to do that walk, right? We've said this on the pod. We actually like announced it on the episode with Alison Roman. Oh, of course.

Tony's favourite show is Broad City. And in the first episode of, I think, Season 8, they walk from the- Don't quote me on that, but it's the first episode of the season. And they walk from the tippity-top of New York- Tippity-top of Manhattan. Manhattan to the tippity-bottom. And Tony goes- For Abby's 30th birthday. of Manhattan. Manhattan to the tippity bottom. And Tony goes.

For Abby's 30th birthday. And it's going to be your 30th birthday. And you're like, guys, I want to do this like they did in the show. And you said, you guys don't have to come. And we're like, no, this actually, like, what a great challenge. What a great feat. Let's do it. We'll get a guy to help film and we'll make a whole thing of it.

Yeah. And I said, Tony, it's 26 kilometers. It's more than half a marathon. And just like you're doing now, you went, yep, cool, it. Yeah. And I said, Tony, it's 26 kilometres. It's more than half a marathon. And just like you're doing now, you went, yep, cool, whatever. Great. Can I just add a little note here that the TV show Broad City, the episodes go for like 22 minutes. And you went 38 kilometres, 22 minutes, cool, whatever.

Who gives a fuck? Yeah. Easy. Kiss it in. So, we're looking at the map the other day. Yeah. And Tony goes, oh, yeah, so there's Central Park. Cool.

So, what, the walk just starts about here? And I go, nah, zoom out a little bit. And you go, oh, what, so like up here? And I go, no, no, zoom out a little bit. I had to zoom out like eight times. Yeah. Before I got to the part that was technically the tippity top. Yeah.

And I go, no, so it's from up there to down here. And then I think because we kind of went, so if Madison Square Garden's there and Central Park's there and we're going to stay here, you start to mentally prepare and get your bearings a little bit. Yep. And then you went, okay, I'm starting to picture it and feel it. Yep. And then I said, so here's where we walk from. And you went, oh, well, obviously we're not doing that. This was a year of planning. This was like two days ago. Yep. And then I said, so here's where we walk from. And you went, oh, well, obviously we're not doing that. This was-

After a year of planning. This was like two days ago. Yeah. I was like, well, obviously not. So, okay. I've planned many things for the walk. Have you? Well, because I'm like, well, how's this video going to look?

How are we going to film it while we're walking up? We've found a tarpa who lives in New York who's going to help film. Yeah. We've gone, oh, okay, if we do this, maybe if we pre-prepare some bits and pieces and then when we do a meet and greet, you know. Or here's a good spot to stop to use the toilet or, yeah. I've gone through the episode and I'm like, oh, in the episode,

they stop at, like, this chicken place. So, like, what if we go to the chicken, you know. So, I've, like, put a lot of thought in it. I still don't want to do it. That's lovely, mate. And you know what is the thought that counts? And that thought is lovely. Great.

Let's leave it at that. Did you know what shoes am I wearing right now? Your running shoes, your walking shoes. And why do I wear those? You know the answer. Think about it. Not for walking or running. No, no, think about it.

Why have I... If you said, why are you wearing those? Why are you wearing those? So that you can walk around? The reason I wear runners is because the... What's a foot person called? Podiatrist said I needed to start wearing these. Yeah.

Why did I go to see a podiatrist? Because you started doing your walking training. In April, I went to a medical professional and said, in October, November, I i'm gonna walk 26 kilometers from the tippity top of manhattan to the tippity bottom yeah and he goes what for i told him the story he goes great he goes i've never seen broad city then the next episode he goes i started watching the show because of you and blah blah and then so i'm booked in to go to the podiatrist a week before we leave so i can get fucking laser whiplash fucking.

Yep. So that my feet will be all good so I can do the walk. In fairness, I mean, we're going to be doing a lot of walking each day anyway. So, I mean, it's just good all round. So. So what's going to happen is I'm going to go to see the podiatrist in December. He's going to go, so how's the walk? Tony looked at a map and said no.

Even though the route hasn't changed, it hasn't got longer. I said to you- Definitely hasn't gotten any fucking shorter. I said to you earlier in the year, do you want to like go for long walks together? Are you doing training? Are you practicing? You did not say, do we want to go together? No, because in my- Or maybe that was in my mind.

But I was like, we can go from your house and we'll like walk to the MCG and around it and go back to your place or something like that. And I was starting to think- Well, you didn't say that to me. Well, I pitched it. To it um like in my mind um but i was like this is a big thing that we need to prepare for and you've just not prepared and now we're not gonna do it well so my question to you is like yes you went to the podiatrist amazing yeah yes you pitched us going for a walk to the mc together. What training have you been doing?

Walking, lots. When? Being a steps guy every night with BJ. No, you haven't. That was part of the steps guy and the shoes and that's all a part of it. Yeah, I know. But then you were like, I'm going to be a steps guy. You bought the watch.

You never used it. But I'm walking. When? Every night. No, you're not. I do. No, you're not. And that's okay.

No, you're not. I do. No, you're not. What do you mean I'm not? And that's okay. Well, so, actually, the thing is, is that I, after realising this last week, I was like, holy shit, I need to fucking start stepping. Yeah. Because I'm going to be fucked otherwise.

And then what happened? Oh, your watch is back on? So. And then you rolled your ankle and fell into a taxi again. Well, that was before I realised about this. But, so I've been, I've actually been stepping the last few days. Really? Because I was like, I've actually

just got to get my shit together. Yeah. Like, I need to because we're going to do this thing and I want it to be fun and I want to... So you do want to do it? Well, no, but like we're already doing it, so yes, we're doing it. Ah, because when you said I don't want to do it anymore, I was like, thank fuck for that. Oh. Well, so I just bought these shoes last night.

No, they're ugly. Send them back. What? Are they the hookers? No. What did I tell you about bringing hookers home? They're not. They're not hookers.

What are they? They're like Asics Cayano gels. Give us a look at the shoes. And because the- Did you also get the frilly socks that are in the picture? No, I didn't get the frilly socks. I don't hate the frilly socks. But the thing is, is that I was like, well,

we've already organised. Well, if I knew that not doing it was an option, I wouldn't have bought these shoes and I wouldn't have been stepping for the last four days. What would I step for otherwise? My health. What else would I be doing that for? Who's got the time? Yeah.

Well, not me. I'm stepping while I'm working. I'm doing as much as I can. How many steps you done? I've been. So, I was like, if we leave in three weeks, I was for the last week, I was like, the last few days, sorry. I was like, for a week, I'll do 10,000 each day.

And kind of build up. And then I'll do like 15,000. Yep. And then I'll do like 20,000. And then when we're in the US, we're going to be walking. Yeah. Heaps like. Is going up 5,000 each.

Is that like a step? I mean, we don't have much time, so we don't have a choice. But is that like a steady. Is that like a lot. I mean, it's a lot difference. Because I did like 10,000 a day for a month and then 12,000 a day for a month. That would obviously be ideal. Yeah.

But like I've wasted a lot of time. Yeah. Because I had those plans around June. I'm doing more, to be fair, I'm doing more walking. But in June, I was like, same. If I do 10 in June and I do 12 in July and then by the time October. Well, that's what I was. Yeah.

I didn't even really think about it. I also genuinely did not know that it was that far. Well, how far? Like 25 Ks or something? 26 kilometers. Yeah. So it's more than half a marathon. How long is that going to take?

According to Google Maps. What if we did like the tippity middle to the tippity bottom? What the tippity middle to the tippity middle, but slightly further south? Yeah. Like what if we just did a walk around the block? A tippity stroll. Yeah. A tippity stroll.

A tippity gander. Realistically, I think we can all, off air chat, we can all look at this and go, it's a long fucking way. Yeah. What is the compromise that we could reach? Because if you don't, you don't want to do it. I want to do it morally. Sorry, I want to do like, I love the idea of it because I really wanted to, I wanted

to do this for my 30th birthday. I was going to go by myself. Fucking what was I thinking? What were you thinking? Well, and to be fair, I was- I didn't know it was that far. No one was more shocked than me, but I was like, if this is what you want to do, then I'll support it. I don't.

Why didn't you tell me? You know me better than anyone. I do. You know I don't want to do this. Why are you going to make me do it? The idea was better than the reality. I just don't know why anybody let me say that we were doing this. Neither do I. You're the worst friend ever. So, say if like something I would really love to do one day and I probably won't. I got

close once but like I would love to run a marathon. Yeah. And I think we've talked about off air and once when i was having a bad mental health i'm like i'm trying to do too much i need to cut some things and running the marathon was one of them absolutely and but since then i've kind of got this inner like i feel like i owe myself like i want to get that one back yeah i mean so for me physically running the marathon would suck i'm not going to sit here and go, I just love to run for hours. Like, fuck no. But there's something like deep intrinsic that's like, I want to tick this off and it'll really mean a lot to me.

So, I think what I'm getting at with the walk is, even though it might fucking suck and be a tough day, is it something important enough for us to go, yeah, it is going to suck, but it's really important to me that I do this. Like I really want to do this. Do you understand the question? You know what I'm saying? Yeah. I think that though it wasn't because I was like this is a – it wasn't like the physical challenge of doing the walk. It was like they do that for their 30th.

It's my favourite show. I'm going to be there on my 30th. Like, of course I will do that. It wasn't like I want to achieve this. I was like, oh, I thought it would be fun. I didn't know how big New York was. I don't even know how big Melbourne is. Like, the other day I pointed on a map to, like, fucking Byron Bay

and was like, there's Melbourne. Like, I'm an idiot idiot and I didn't know. Is it going to be something we dread up until the moment? Is it going to be sitting in the back of our mind, like a weight on our shoulders of going, fuck, we have to do that thing? Considering all the people we're going to meet, we've got a few things lined up in New York, which are looking pretty exciting.

Yeah. And also like when the other day something else that i would really like to do is go ice skating at 30 rock oh yeah and i was like oh i won't be able to do that because if i injure myself i won't be able to do the walk and if i know you and sorry if i know your ankles like i get injured a lot yeah you're a clumsy girl like but then yeah do you not want to do that shit but then then i'm like oh so we'll miss out on other things. But I feel really bad that we were like, this is something we're doing. Because I don't want it to sound as though I'm lazy.

I'm actually just like, I think we have bitten off more than we can chew. If you had the choice between doing the walk or going to see a Broadway show and going ice skating and maybe going to like a random comedy club and just seeing the random thing in a cellar and drinking the coffee and going and having lunch with Alison Roman. What would you choose? I'm going to pick the second one. Yeah. But I feel really bad because we kind of, but like, are you happy to not do it? Yeah, mate.

Because. Yeah, I just gave Tony a like, this very subtle, not subtle nod. It's also going to be, like, close to the end of our trip. What is it? It's, like, just before. Oh, no, it's, like, the middle, isn't it? What if I fucking throw a yin on the walk while I'm doing my yins on the walk and then I can't do anything for the rest of the time we're

there that's the other thing I'm actually not a fucking athlete believe it or not and I actually don't believe that but like shocker but you know I could we could really injure ourselves yeah I mean walking is a dangerous sport let's not be let's not kid ourselves no but you can like be fucked for a couple of days well I think in original plan, we were going to do this walk and the next day was, like... A rest day. Like, we're not leaving the hotel room, hire a masseuse, fucking 50 litres of Gatorade, pump it into my veins.

We could do, like, a cute romantic, like, walk of Central Park together. See, I think that there is opportunity for a big walk. See the sights. Maybe if there's,'s like a walking tour or something like that it's not that i don't want to walk anywhere don't get me wrong we're not accusing you of not being a foot mobile um for the whole time i will only be pushed around by you guys on a skateboard um can we organize that it's not that i'm like anti-walk i just i really did i'd like to put my hand up.

I really didn't realise how long it was. I can't believe that you're such a bad friend, Ryan, that you didn't say, hey, Tony, are you sure you want to do this? Can't believe you're also such a bad friend now for buying these shoes to try and do the walk. I'm doing the things, the right things to try and make it happen, wearing my Apple Watch. You bought not one but two treadmills to prepare?

Exactly. The treadmill is permanently set up in our lounge room at the moment so that I can do my steps. Is it? Yes. Okay. I'm actually, like, I'm not even, I've been, the last few days, I've been, like, stepping like a mad woman because I was like,

I need to fucking. Get my steps in. I can show you on my Apple Watch activity. Would it be a dick move if on a day off I just went and did it by myself? Yes. Okay. I'm obviously not going to do that, but could you imagine? you go we made a big deal we cancelled it and then you go all right what'd you do today oh i just did the fucking i just did the walk that you can be fucked doing

you know how like what a shit move that would be trust me mate if there's one thing i'm not doing on a day off yeah surprise what do you think do you think that people will go like, oh, chubby bitch, not doing it. You know what I mean? Do you think people would say that? First of all, no. And second of all, I'd rather be called a chubby bitch and not do it than to do it and then still be chubby bitches anyway. Just think about how much fried chicken we could eat on that day.

Yeah. You know what I mean? That's a marathon. Can we do a chicken marathon of New York? Yeah. How many chicken places around Central Park? Like we just walk around, I need a slice of pizza at every place we pass. That sounds more like a marathon I could get around.

I bought the shoes already. It's a chicken crawl. We'll do a chicken crawl. The girls from Broad City weren't coming down or anything, were they? I had to go with that candidate. Because maybe that'll be the decider. Nah, we put the... If they're coming, then maybe we have to do it. We put the be the decider. Nah, we put the... Nah.

If they're coming, then maybe we have to do it. I'll just cancel it. It's all good. Oh, okay. We put the feelers out. She's on the line. Not a lot came back, actually. Yeah, fuck that show.

Oh, hey. Abby and Alana. Abby and Alana, welcome. I've got to love to see it here. Guys, are we feeling good about that? I'm feeling great. Are we in a fight? No, I think we're good now.

Are we okay i think you understand where i was coming from i understand where you were coming from um i gotta love to see you oh great um sometimes to like get a baby to stop crying or to like there is nothing i won't do to make mabel smile oh yeah like i'll dance like a fuckhead i'll sing dumb songs and like i'm you'll walk 27km. But, like, the amount of times that, like, I'll stop and go, hang on, I've got pants on my head and I'm wearing socks on my hands and I'm trying to, like, just to make her laugh. Like, there's nothing you won't do, right? That's beautiful. Especially, like, in the privacy of your own home, you can just be a bit of a fuckhead.

Yeah. So, I walked down the stairs the other day and Bridget didn't know I was coming into the lounge room. Yeah. It was just Bridget and Mabel in the room. And I think Bridget was in that zone of like... Just keep the baby happy. Yeah. Yeah.

So, Bridget is laying on her back, holding Mabel in the air, singing Spider Pig. Spider Pig. Spider Pig. And I have never had a bigger smile on my face in my entire life. Oh, so Bridget was... Two for the price of one. Two for the... I don't know. Mabel was happy. You were happy. Mabel was face in my entire life. Oh, so Bridget was ended. Two for the price of one. Two for the... I don't know.

Mabel was happy, you were happy. Mabel was impartial about the performance, which, to be fair, is rude. You know, it's because she hasn't seen the Simpsons movie yet. Yeah. So she didn't get the reference. But I think... I don't think Bridget would ever do that if she knew I was in the room. No.

So I just kind of walked in and I was seeing and I was like, oh, my God, this is a cool thing. That's so sweet. And I said out... I walked straight into the room and went, you'll have to see it. That's beautiful. Yeah, and it was beautiful.

Was she embarrassed, though, when you walked in? Very embarrassed, very embarrassed. Does whatever a spider pig does. I love the Simpsons movie. Same. It's so good. Do you want to watch that in New York instead of walking? Yeah.

I'd watch that 26.7 times. Probably fucking take not as long. My love to see it is that I tried something new on the weekend. What did you try? What was his name? Well, given that I've already just given something up, I've got to, like, redeem myself over being like, yeah, I'm open to new experiences.

I tried to live up to the new house I'm about to move into, Bread House. I made a fuckcaccia. Really? Yeah. Welcome to 1997, babe. Yeah, I know. Because it's like one of the-

Did you call your friend Bree? It's like one of the easiest breads to make because- That's like a first bread. Yeah, it's like a- It's an introductory bread. Yeah. And I had all the stuff- I'm so proud of you. Thank you. I like had all the stuff. I'm so proud of you.

Thank you. I, like, had all the stuff in the house already, which made me feel very homely. Like, I had the flour, I had yeast, I had all the shit. And it was an absolute disaster. Completely fucked it up. It's the process. But I had so much fun.

Yeah, that's what it's all about. And I, like, got up, I made all the stuff, then I let it rest, then I did all the other stuff, then I let it rest again, then I baked it and then it came out absolutely shithouse, threw it in the bin, but wasn't it fun? And... Didn't even eat it. No, I had a corner and I went...

No, that'll do me, actually. I don't want to eat this glue. And I threw it out. But, I mean, 60 cents in flour, that's all. You know what I mean? Good money. Cheers for that. Right.

So... Not to make it. The thing is, is that normally I would have sulked and, like, been so fucked off about, like, it turning to shit in the past. But I was like, you know what? I enjoyed all day that I was, like, checking on my bread and, like, checking the timer and doing my steps, checking the bread. You know, it was actually lovely. And I totally fucked it up and I still had fun

I do love to see that yeah me too it's the journey not the destination exactly and I was like you know what probably for the best

that we're not going to eat all that fuckachia because I've got to walk all those steps soon no I don't maybe I'll try the bread again I was going to say if given carbs

and exercise the fact that you I need the fuel but you've got it around the wrong way throw the exercise out and eat the fucker chair. Well, now that we're not doing the steps... I'll come around. I probably will. I'll bring some hummus

and a little bit of that. Yeah, I'll try the fucker chair again. We'll give it another crack. But yeah, I love to say that. I just had a bit of fun. I'll have to say that. Bit of fun. Bit of fun. It's fun, girls. It's fun, girls. I love fun. Tomorrow on the show, we've got confessions. These are top confessions. And, um... Should I say the first line of this confession?

Oh, no, because you always then over-explain it and I get stressed and I have to wait the whole overnight. I was about to say the whole day, but you know what I mean. It was still burning three days after the grinder hookup. Oh, they tried to make fuck a chair as well. No, they fucked more than a chair, you know what I'm saying? All right, thanks for coming on that journey with us. If everybody could leave their words of support on today's episode thread

about the cancellation of the walk. I'm so glad I didn't book in that camera guy. I might wait until this chat. Oh. No, it's good. I don't want to fuck that fuck. All right. Are you joking?

Imagine all the places I'd get and I don't need to go to the toilet and I don't know where to go. See, that's the thing, right? I was like, oh, my God, I'm the only one that doesn't want to do it. Ryan's really keen, but you weren't keen. See, if we'd just been honest with each other, we wouldn't have ever agreed to this. No, I was supporting you.

Yeah, and thank you for that. Do you want me to support you with that chicken marathon? I'll do it. Maybe, maybe. Watch this face. I think we should just take a breath for making some bold proclamations. Yep. Yep.

Proclamations. Yep, that's fine. Exclamations. Yep. But we have to do something with the day. We can't just then sit down all day. We have to, like, do something. Why don't we do the New York Marathon?

That's on when we're there. I'll go down there. Oh, watch it. Yeah, like, go down to the finish line. Oh, yeah, okay we're there. I'll go down there. Oh, watch it. Yeah, like go down to the finish line. Oh, yeah, okay. I thought you meant let's do it

and I was like, mate, we've just gotten out of something else. I know what'll get us out of 26 kilometres. 25. 25, yeah.

42. I'll do a half. Is that, no. Marathon's 42 kilometres. I thought that, what's a half? 20. Half of that?

21. 22 or something, yeah. Nah. What are we even, get the fuck out of here. See youone. Twenty-two or something, yeah. Nah. What are we even considering? Get the fuck out of here. See you tomorrow. Love you, bye.