Toni and Ryan - The Simpsons Are Hiring

Episode Date: March 20, 2025

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Starting point is 00:00:00 With the Fizz loyalty program, you get rewarded just for having a mobile plan. You know, for texting and stuff. And if you're not getting rewards like extra data and dollars off with your mobile plan, you're not with Fizz. Switch today. Conditions apply. Details at fizz.ca. This episode is brought to you by Audible, where you can listen to the new audiobook, Sunrise on the Reaping, by bestselling author Suzanne Collins. So this is for all the fantasy and Hunger Games fans because
Starting point is 00:00:27 this is about the backstory from Katniss's mentor, Haymitch. Katniss, what a badass. Badass. Honestly. We watch those movies so often at home. I feel like they are such a high rotation like Good Watch. Absolutely and this time it's the 50th Hunger Games and there are double the tributes that have to compete which means it's pretty full-on. Yeah twice as big. Yep. Hamish is torn from his home and the girl he loves and has to enter the deadly arena with little hope of survival but a deep urge to fight that could change everything. Packed with fantasy, fierce challenges and shocking
Starting point is 00:01:03 twists. Yeah fantasy is massive right now and this sounds huge. So if you love the ballad of the Songbirds and Snakes, then get ready for the follow-up in the series, Sunrise on the Reaping. Discover the joys of listening by downloading Audible and taking it with you anywhere. Sunrise on the Reaping, available now at audible.ca. Hello, welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast. My name's Tony and this is Ryan and we never start a podcast episode without a tarpa's approval. Yeah, that's Tony and Ryan podcast. Now Michelle is in Finland. Hello, Michelle. Hi. Now it's a bit of a time difference. So it's in the middle of the night. Sorry, Michelle. But how do you say the
Starting point is 00:01:44 Tony and Ryan podcast in Finnish? Is that a thing that would translate? Or is it just our names? bit of a time difference. So it's in the middle of the night. But how do you say the Tony and Ryan podcast in Finnish? Is that a thing that would translate? Was it just our names? Well, it's kind of the same. But yeah, I don't speak Finnish. I speak Spanish. Oh, I'm about to throw up. That is the funniest thing I've ever heard. No, but just like names, isn't it? Like Tony and Ryan, Tony and Ryan. You know what I mean? Like it's the same thing. Is that not a thing? No, but just like names, isn't it? Like Tony and Ryan, Tony and Ryan, you know what I mean? Like it's the same thing. Have you ever been to Ikea? Oh my God. What do they call Ikea there? It's just Ikea. Yeah. Wow. Point of cultural difference. It's crazy how similar we all are. Michelle, we would love it if you approved today's episode. I feel very
Starting point is 00:02:22 added. Charles is looking at me, kissing himself. I'm glad everyone's having a fun time at my expense. Michelle, do you approve today's episode? Yes, I approve this podcast. Amazing. Hi, this is Michelle from Finland and I approve this podcast. I would like to start this episode with a shout out. Oh wow. To Pamela Hayden who is the voice of Milhouse in The Simpsons. Yes, amazing.
Starting point is 00:03:02 At 70 years old, fuck, after 35 years on the show, almost 700 episodes, she has announced she's retiring. Imagine 700, like you get a job on a show. Yeah. Oh yeah, there's a couple of months work maybe. Well, and because at the beginning of The Simpsons, you didn't know. Might get a season or two. Yeah. And you just didn't know the future of TV even. Yeah. Like, cause it was like TV was new as a concept and now we're on YouTube. Like, okay.
Starting point is 00:03:33 But you know. It's been an honor and a joy to have worked with such a funny, witty, groundbreaking show. And I'll always have a special place in my heart for that blue haired 10 year old boy with glasses. Did she, that's beautiful. Did she voice anybody else? You know how most people on The Simpsons voice a few people? She also did Jimbo Jones. Nice. My shirt's really cheap on me. You know that episode where he's with the babysitter? And also I believe the Flanders children. Oh Rod and Todd. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:03 Now here's the line I felt was interesting for you Tony Lodge and you watching. Producers plan to recast the role in coming months and are looking for a talented voice actor to apply and audition. Talented voice actor? sure! Yes, audio queen, audio queen. So, yesterday for some reason, we were talking about retiring and our retirement jobs. I love for some reason, just another day isn't it? Yeah, yeah. So Tony, have you got a millhouse in you? Oh god, don't tell my boyfriend. Your? Oh, I can't. What'd you call him?
Starting point is 00:04:49 Lowercase i, capital C, like iPod. I can't. I can't say the F word. I just can't do it. Pre-husband? That sounds like pre-cum. Why can't you say the F word at the moment? Do we need to talk about this? No, I just feel, oh, see, I know that I'm going to say this and you're going to be like, that's not a thing.
Starting point is 00:05:14 It feels so lardy da. Like I'm, oh, my fiance, I feel like I'm like showing off. Yeah, I get you. Do you know what I mean? Like it feels like, oh, my fiance, it just feels like so like high maintenance. And that's your number one fear is being classified as high maintenance.
Starting point is 00:05:35 I mean, I'm trying to unlearn this behavior, but yeah. Oh, I forgot to do something. For those playing along with the Suzuki Jimny. Because when you said, you'll say it's not a real thing, I was about to look at the camera and be like. Is he agreeing with that or is he still driving a Suzuki? Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, both.
Starting point is 00:05:56 But you know what I mean? Like it just feels so like, it just feels too fancy for me. I think there's a way to go about it. So if you say like, honest to me, this is Torb, this is my fiance. Or if you go, my fiance! But that seems so much more fun. Oh, and I love fun.
Starting point is 00:06:20 But I think that even in being like, oh, so my fiance was saying, I'm like, I actually felt that when I was like first had a girlfriend. Oh, my girlfriend. It's so official. But it's like you show. But there are people that won't use their name. Like if you just kept saying my fiance, I'm like Torbz, like I know him. So true. You know what I mean? Like he's got a name.
Starting point is 00:06:43 If you meet someone new for the first time, the first time you bring it up, you go, oh, my fiancee Torbs, and then just say Torbs. Is that fine? It's like they're trying to like, it's like, we get it, you've got a girlfriend. And that's what I don't, I don't want to be like, oh, well in case you didn't notice the fucking Pluto on my fucking hand. Where's my wedding ring? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:07:03 And there's not going to be in any of the pockets of that jacket because that jacket's mine. Yeah, it is. I've got your wedding ring. That's not a good look. I haven't seen my wedding ring since my cousin Rachel's wedding in 2023. Not that we're counting. Okay. Anyway. Have you got a millhouse inside you?
Starting point is 00:07:21 Do you want me to give you a line? Of millhouses? Oh my God. What a show! Hang on, let me do a try first. I don't know Bart. I don't know Bart. I just want to remind you What's At Stake. Yeah, give me a line.
Starting point is 00:07:39 What's At Stake is a job being a voice actor, which is what you're good at. Yeah. On one of the greatest running shows in history. And this is a quote I'm familiar with. I've got some cool pogs, Alf pogs. Remember Alf, he's back in pog form. That's not bad. That's not bad. Alf, cause he's got a little rasp.
Starting point is 00:08:03 Yeah. Like Alf pogs. I've got, cause he's got a little rasp. Yeah. Like Al's Pogs. I've got, ooh, ooh, ooh, whoa. He sounded like you're about to do like Crease Lightning. I got chills, they're multiplying. Um, we'll go one more and then I've got another line for you, which is my favorite line. Remember Al's?
Starting point is 00:08:19 He's back in Pog form. What am I, is it the accents not right? I don't know, it's not not right. It's just what he's- He's back in Alf, he's back in Pog, no that's not right. I think it's like- He's more whiny than that.
Starting point is 00:08:36 More whiny and probably younger? He's back in Pog form, no that's not right. And more raspy. That's more Lisa. Yeah. I've got some cool Pogs, Alf Pog form, no that's not right. That's more Lisa. Yeah. I've got some cool pogs, Alf Pogs. Remember Alf, he's back in pog form. It's getting closer. The inflation at the end is not sounding right.
Starting point is 00:08:56 Sorry, the inflection? I mean, inflation's killing all of us. All right, this is my favourite line. Remember that time you ate my goldfish and you lied to me and said I never had a goldfish? Then why'd I have the bowl Bart? Why'd I have the bowl? It's more ras. Why'd I have the bowl? Why'd I have the bowl? I'm quite good at Luann Van Houten though you'll have to speak up
Starting point is 00:09:26 son I'm wearing my jacuzzi suit is the mum does she need a fucking re voice no no I'm so I got some good remember that time you ate my goldfish and lied to me that's close on why'd I have the ball bar why'd I have the ball Bart? Why'd I have the ball? I think I'm getting there. Then why'd I have the ball Bart? Why'd I have the ball? Nah. Getting fit, yeah. I reckon if you come back-
Starting point is 00:09:57 I could work on it. I'm up to season 27 of The Simpsons. Yeah, you stuck with it. Yeah, I just pop it on in the background like if I'm cleaning the house and stuff. Yeah. Because it's just so familiar, like, and I mean the new episodes I haven't seen any of them. Yeah, but I mean all the middle stuff I've seen a thousand fucking times. Yeah, so in some good news. Why'd I have the ball? That was close. That was good. Why'd I have the ball Bart?
Starting point is 00:10:30 Why'd I have the ball? In another life where we didn't have this fun show. Oh my god yeah. Would being the voice of a cartoon character be like pretty high up on the list? I would love that. I would just love to be a voice actor or an actor. I would have so much fun doing that and I have like a freakish memory. Right. Like I have quite a good memory. Like I can remember the lines to most like movies and tv shows that I watch and stuff. Do you ever think, and I have this, yeah,
Starting point is 00:11:03 that I'll remember something random and I go oh oh the things I forget. Oh 1000%. Yeah like where's my wedding ring? Yes, yeah, yep. But I can tell you about the 10 guests that Letterman had on the last week of his show. How crazy is that? Yeah I know and I just bought my wedding ring. Is that is that something fucked like what you value is what you can remember? No. Like I'm not saying that. I'm asking as a scientist. You literally did say that.
Starting point is 00:11:33 I'm something of a scientist myself. That's from the Spiderman. Why'd I have the ball? Hi, it's Michelle from Finland and you're listening to Call Me Andrian. This episode is brought to you by Maduree and Maduree has the nicest fine jewelry. It's perfect for stacking and wearing every day. And you can like play around with different styles, mix different colors and metals and stack different combos.
Starting point is 00:12:00 So there's really something for everyone. And can I tell you a cute little personal note? Please. You know, these gold earrings that I wear, they're majoree. Oh. And they were like the first bit of jewellery I ever bought myself. Yeah. Would you say that was the gateway? That was your first like, oh, I think I'm a jewellery person now.
Starting point is 00:12:16 Yes, I'm a majeuree person now. Yeah. Oh, put that on the front cover of, it's not a book, of this audio ad. The products are beautifully designed and have a minimal but fun vibe, just like Tony, minimal and fun. Oh my gosh, you speak my language. And it's also affordable. Maduri pieces are designed in house and handcrafted by world renowned jewelers committed to quality craftsmanship, as well as ethical
Starting point is 00:12:41 and sustainable jewelry production. Plus in 2020, the brand launched the Maduri Empowerment Fund in support of higher education for underrepresented women and non-binary individuals. So they're doing good while helping us look good. Epic. Pretty good. Love it. Play, mix and stack in store in app or on maduri.com. Let's talk about cream. Oh, I love cream. Are we talking like ice cream or like moisturizer? Actually as a sensitive skin girl, I can do both. I know you can do both.
Starting point is 00:13:09 And as much as we love ice cream, I'm currently talking about moisturizer. I'm talking about Aveeno Baby Healthy Start, which for young kids that you can use from day one. You can use this Healthy Start balm to help moisturize, nourish and comfort the skin of babies. And when Mabel is older, I want you, Tony, to remind her who moisturised her every night. So when she's got beautiful skin, you'd be like, yep, Dad used to do that for you.
Starting point is 00:13:33 Well, I was about to say you're doing a great job because she high-fived me yesterday when I came round for dinner and they were the softest hands I've ever felt. You're welcome, Tony. You're welcome, Mabel. Well, we love a routine and we know how important good skin habits are to start early. And with a Veno Baby Healthy Start, it's easy to moisturise and support baby skin moisture barrier from day one. You can learn more at aveno.ca. A massive shout out to a few of our champion tapas over at our Patreon. Rhiannon Bauer, hardly know her, good on you Rhiannon.
Starting point is 00:14:10 Cassie Kirby, Crystal Math, Ivy Sternberg, Taylor, good on you Taylor, Catherine Core and Cody Perry. Thank you very much for being part of our Patreon, we absolutely love to see it. And if you've ever thought about maybe checking it out, you can, all the info is in the show notes, it's in the YouTube bio, but all of our tiers of Patreon are scroll across the bottom of the thing. So if you want to be one of those names, go check it out. Come on over. There's three years worth of content in there. There is. Old live streams and playlists. Life in DCI, our....blogs, like heaps of stuff in there, so... Charles, wave at the webcam.
Starting point is 00:14:48 Charles does a behind the scenes show. Yep. Are we calling it a show? Is that too much? I love that every time we talk about it, something different. Yeah. That's what... I think I like the charm of it. What would you call it, Charles? And I always watch it. Uh... I don't... I don't know what I would call it.
Starting point is 00:15:02 Vlog! Yeah. Yeah! Vlog. A vlog from the office of it. Vlog. Yeah. Vlog. A vlog from the office of Tarp Tower. Yeah. Welcome. Okay.
Starting point is 00:15:10 That's beautiful. Can it be an anthology? Is that for birds? No you're thinking of an aviary. Is ornithology that's the study of birds? An aviary... Is it big cage for the birds? Is it a big cage? Like a bird aviary?
Starting point is 00:15:32 No, but you said big cage. Big powerful laptop, big powerful bird cage. It's a study of birds including their behaviour, evolution, ecology... Okay, stop right there. And Charles would know, he's studied a few birds in his time. You know what I'm saying? Oh, Charles loves to study the birds. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:15:51 Are we allowed to say that legally? Sorry, I've just looked over at Charles and I've seen you on the screen and you look fucking good. You look really good today. You're saying that because I'm wearing your jacket. No, and my hat as well. Whose jacket's that? That's also my hat.
Starting point is 00:16:04 Is it? Yeah. Am I wearing anything of my own today? The socks? My underwear. I don't do that on Fridays. These are my socks. Fuck you, Charles. And your high top Nikes? Or are they Lily's boyfriend's shoes? Look, when staff members start here, they have to get to wear their boyfriend's shoes. Look, when staff members start here, they have to get to wear their boyfriend's shoes. That's a real power play. Charles was like, what should I bring in? Okay. So for everybody that listening, wherever you're listening, but for people that are watching on YouTube, you might not know this, but we do a daily show that isn't on YouTube.
Starting point is 00:16:45 So you can listen every day. And the other day we were talking about, I love to see it, where they've introduced at a supermarket in the UK, a line where it's like a little bit more and you're allowed to then kind of, if you join that line, if you'd like to have a chat, you can have a bit more time. It feels a bit less pressure to just like scramble through the line. It's for the chatty Cathys of the world. And.
Starting point is 00:17:09 And you said I'd hate this, which I hated that you said I'd hate this, which is ironic. But then you did hate it. That just. And I was right. But I think that. Which I hate. So we're really positive about it. But I think that also, I don't even know if you said this,
Starting point is 00:17:26 but I think that people that love a chat normally aren't that self-aware. Like people- I'm no comment. No, but people that, but they aren't, right? So it's also the ability to be like, I might go through the little bit more till. Oh, like they don't know they're a chatty cat.
Starting point is 00:17:43 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like they're not self-aware of, that they don't know they're a chatty cat. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like they're not self aware of that. They maybe go, I just asked them how they are and like, whereabouts they live. That wasn't a big chat. But you go, I just want to get through, buy whatever I need to buy for Mabel and get home. Hey mate, for the sin, have a good day. Thanks. Yeah, you know, like you don't want to be a bother.
Starting point is 00:18:00 Well, it's also that you're like, I don't want to leave an impression. I'm not going to be overly nice. I'm not going to be rude, but I just want to get through and do my thing. Yep. So I know that we were just talking about me starting a new job as a voiceover actor, but I said, I think I'd quite like to work at that checkout because people love to chat to me. You are a chatty caffeine.
Starting point is 00:18:19 And I love to chat back, but I do have one of those faces. People love to tell me their life story. It happens to me a lot. It used to happen to my mom as well. And I, it was one of, it was a character and a quality I really loved about my mom. Like we would be at the shops and she would talk to someone for 20 minutes and I'd be like, who was that? And she'd be like, I dunno. Like just some lady I've got one of those faces. She just came and started telling me her life story. But the way that mum would talk to them, I couldn't even tell she didn't know them.
Starting point is 00:18:53 Oh, so it was like you're observing this going, oh, they must have known each other for 20 years. I'm like, did you used to work together? Did you fuck? You know, like, did you do mum's group? Her kid born the same time as me and you met at the hospital? I don't know. And I'd be like, how did you know her? And mum would go, I don't know. So I think I have one of those faces. It's proven to me quite often.
Starting point is 00:19:15 But it turns out I also have one of those voices. Because... Mille Houseworks at the checkout. Well, the other day I had to call my insurance company. Kill me now. Well, I'm leaving this intentionally blank. I'm not going to name the person and I'm not going to name the company. Put your hands up and tell me if you've got something new you need to insure. Well so it was, it was. I need to increase my content insurance by five million dollars. Well yeah, anyway, anyway, so I don't know any of that stuff.
Starting point is 00:19:58 And they said Millhouse is engaged? Holy fuck. How'd I get the ball botched? Like that's good. Why do I have the ring? Anyway, so it was a bit of that. We also like recently got a gate for our house. So I was like, oh, does that bring our premium down? Yeah. I'd put off calling them for so long. It doesn't. I know. Why do I have the ball? They sting ya when your car's not secure. See, this is the fucking
Starting point is 00:20:23 thing. And then when your car is secure Oh, we don't really give a fuck about that. Oh, that doesn't make a difference I'm like, but you told me that's why it was more expensive Insurance companies need to get their fucking act together. So this is why I didn't want to name the company. Okay Because I think that they all do it to be honest. Yeah, it's a raw It's like it's not this one particular place But anyway, I'd put off calling them for so long that all of a sudden I had like five questions
Starting point is 00:20:48 I had to ask. Anyway, so I'm on the phone and this wonderful lady, let's call her Hannah. That's my name. Okay. Fake name, fake name. Sure. One of the great things to do with a fake name
Starting point is 00:20:58 is just to give them the real name because you've said fake name. So, you know, it's like hiding in plain sight. So it's like, who cares? Cause it's like, oh, well that wasn't her name. Yeah, so obviously it name, so. Oh. You know, it's like hiding in plain sight. So it's like, who cares? Cause it's like, oh, well that wasn't her name. Yeah, so obviously it wasn't Hannah. Yeah. Anyway, so this wonderful woman, Hannah,
Starting point is 00:21:12 answers the phone and she says, hi, you're on with Hannah in the Melbourne branch. Like they say that on the thing. Yep. And like, how can I help you today? And I was like, Hi, Hannah, I've actually got a few things to talk about, like, what is easiest to do first? And she was like, Oh, well, what's
Starting point is 00:21:32 at the top of your list? And like, we'll work through it. Anyway, so first of all, I'm like, I need to add this. One of the policies that we have isn't showing up in the online portal. Can you add that? And she goes, absolutely. And it's like, all business, all good. Been on the phone for about five minutes at this point. And I go, okay. And the other thing is I need to put my engagement ring on the thing. And I had emailed them some information because I had the like- Did you send them the engagement post on Instagram? Yeah. I'm like, is this enough? Here you go.
Starting point is 00:22:07 Does this count as a receipt? Well, they were like, I don't know. I've never had anything this fancy before, but I had to send them the diamond certificate and stuff. Yeah, yeah. So I didn't even know that was a thing. Yeah. Like so and it's got its own serial number and it's got like, yes, this is a real diamond and fucking whatever.
Starting point is 00:22:24 Because is that cuz like people would Lose or have stolen their $20,000 diamond and it turns out it wasn't a real diamond in the first place. Well, I think I'm like and that's fine. But As in that's fine. Like I don't care the real diamond is much of a muchness But I'm like, well, obviously if I was to lose it, it needs to fucking whatever. Anyway, so I'm talking to her and she goes, oh my gosh, do you have a photo of the ring? And I was like, oh, like-
Starting point is 00:22:54 At Tony.Lodge. Well, I was like, do you need me to, it's just at Tony Lodge. I was like, do you need that for the insurance thing? And she goes, no, I've just, I've never seen one for that much before. What the fuck? Fucking right.
Starting point is 00:23:10 Can we beep that out? But that's what she said. No, we're not beeping that out. Can we actually please? No, can we please? But no, she goes, no. I can't believe Hannah found out how much it was before I did.
Starting point is 00:23:22 Well, I don't know how much it was. I just sent the invoices. As if you didn't have a look. As if you didn't have a look. It wasn't my money. It wasn't my purchase. I didn't look. Well, it's your insurance fucking account,
Starting point is 00:23:34 so you're going to have to look if your premium goes up by $4,000 a month. No. No, no, no. Anyway. Anyway, it was, um. As if you didn't look. It's totally normal to look. I know it's like, oh of course not.
Starting point is 00:23:46 But like, everyone watching, if a thousand people were in that situation, a thousand people would look at it. Yeah, yeah, fuck you. Fuck you. You looked, yeah. And hey, you don't need to... We're bros, we're best friends. You can't lie to me.
Starting point is 00:24:02 Yeah, so true. Yeah, you know what, sorry. I'm just embarrassed because it's obviously... I get it, but no. Yeah, okay, and I'm sorry. I'm sorry, but... So am I. So she goes... I'm devastated.
Starting point is 00:24:13 Yeah. How dare you? No, but anyway... Anyway, so she goes... So she goes, do you have a photo of it? And I was like, do you need... No, sorry, I'm gonna need a moment. Nah, I'm not gonna tell you. I know, but I'm gonna need a moment to
Starting point is 00:24:28 ask. Okay. I'm not gonna tell you. I'm not gonna tell you. You wouldn't tell me, would you? No, it's not my information. It wasn't my money. It wasn't my purchase. It's not my name. Do I need to call Hannah? Anyway, and she goes, Oh, do you have a photo? And I was like, Oh, I don't. I don't know. No. No. Fake name. Anyway, and she goes, Oh, do you have a photo? And I was like, Oh, I don't. I didn't send one with the stuff. And I was like,
Starting point is 00:24:52 but all the information about the ring is in that, in this package. And she goes, Oh no, it just sounds beautiful. And I'd love to see it. She goes, how many carrots is it? Like, you know,
Starting point is 00:25:02 and I was like, Oh, and I told her and oh, why is Hannah getting the fucking scoops? Because I thought it was like necessary. Scoop John needs exclusives. I'm running low. Oh, the jacket's off. She's stressed. I am. Anyway, I did not think that this would end up being this, but anyway, so- This is great. I love this.
Starting point is 00:25:27 So she's like, do you have a photo? I'm like, no, I didn't send you one. She goes, no, it just sounds beautiful. Like, oh my God, blah, blah, blah. Anyway, so we're kind of chatting about it. And I was like, I don't have a photo, but like, I can describe it to you. She's like, God, that just sounds stunning. Anyway, and then we kind of start chatting.
Starting point is 00:25:43 Are you friends with Hannah now? And then, and I was like, oh, anyway, like, oh, sorry, I'm sure that you're busy. I've got a couple more things kind of thing. And she goes, oh, we have been busy actually. Doesn't sound like it. Send me a photo, tell me all about it. I know. And she was like, oh, we actually have been really busy
Starting point is 00:26:01 because of all the flooding and the cyclone in Queensland. She's like, we've been run off our feet because people, well, because all these people are like trying to figure out whether their home was covered, whether they, you know, all of that stuff, which is obviously fucking horrific. And she was like, and everything that we've been doing recently has just been really, really heavy. So it's quite nice to talk to someone that's like, excited and good news and a a good mood and stuff. And I was like, oh, well yeah, like, ha ha, I'll chat all day if you don't stop me.
Starting point is 00:26:32 So let me keep going kind of thing. Then she goes, well, yeah, the thing with the floods is like, my best friend, Brett, he's just moved up to Queensland and he's really worried. And I was like, well, how was his house? And she goes, well, so his new girlfriend is, and then I'm getting all the tea all of a sudden on Hannah's wife.
Starting point is 00:26:49 Am I getting my nails done at the saloon? Literally. Little gossip session. Brett's new girlfriend is up there and he's never been through a cyclone before. So he's telling my friend Hannah. You said he's never been through, I didn't know where that sentence was going.
Starting point is 00:27:01 No, no, no. And then I was like. Where's Brett's ex at though? Oh, I don't know. She didn't say. Yeah. Probably for a reason. Do you reckon it's Hannah?
Starting point is 00:27:09 Dead. Oh. No, she's not dead. So Hannah goes. His ex, me. Yeah, me. Oh, no. But then.
Starting point is 00:27:17 Can we get Hannah on the show as a guest? And then Hannah goes, Hannah goes, yeah. I'm like, I've got a 10 year old and he's saying, well, where's uncle Brett? Are they okay? And she's like, so I'm, you know, during, and like, I've got a 10 year old and he's saying, well, where's uncle Brett? Are they okay? And she's like, so I'm, you know, during the cyclone, I had to calm my kid down and you know,
Starting point is 00:27:31 so that's been really hard and she goes, but the good thing is, is that we kept the call center open all weekend. So I worked on the weekend and I was like, oh, they bloody call you in on a Saturday. She goes, I got double time. And I went, what's that worth to you, Hannah? And we're just having this fucking gab set.
Starting point is 00:27:48 And I realized that the exact thing is that I have one of those faces and I chatted with her for 37 minutes. Which is why I'm not naming the place or her real name because I don't want her to get in trouble. Oh my God name because I don't want her to get in trouble. Oh my god. Because I don't want her to get in trouble that she was on the phone. She did help me. She saved us heaps of money as well. She combined two of our policies and fucking, you know, did her like
Starting point is 00:28:16 wizard magic on the bloody insurance. And she did a good job. She did a wonderful job. Everything's all fucking all above board. Now, Tony talking with someone for about 37 minutes, was there an Airbnb out at the front? Well, yeah, I had to make my money back. Yeah. And for those of you listening in Australia,
Starting point is 00:28:35 I know there's been a few. Yeah, and halfway through the phone call, I went, shout out to a few of our champion tarpers over at our Patreon. Today's phone call is brought to you by Onyx. You mean Oxio? Fuck! Yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:51 No, shout out to our good friends at Oxio in Canada. Some of my good friends there. Bonjour! But yeah, so turns out I just have one of those faces, one of those voices, everything about me. But shout out to my new friend, Hannah. I almost used her real name. Almost used her real name. Almost used her real name.
Starting point is 00:29:05 Oh, I almost said Hannah. Nah, it was Michelle, her name. She was fucking lovely. We had a great chat. Why are you adding her? I just, at the end I was like, I wanted to be like- What are you using her name for?
Starting point is 00:29:14 At the end I wanted to be like, you're in Melbourne, eh? Well, we chatted and I was like, so you're in Melbourne? She goes, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm in Melbourne. I just wanted to be like, should we catch up? Because she was great. She was really nice. I think I found her on LinkedIn. No, you haven't. Let me just see. Let me see.
Starting point is 00:29:38 No, no, not the right company. Okay. Anyway, so- There are 20 Michelle Michelle Insurance profiles in... If anybody ever wants to catch up, just give up. Maybe we should start a light chatting hotline and I could just talk to people that want to have a yam. It's called a podcast and you already do it.
Starting point is 00:29:55 No, but no one calls in. Remember we did Instagram Live last week and we... That was so fun. That was really fun. Anyway, okay. I've got a you love to see it. Please. My love to see it is that something that I love very much is going viral and I think it's having a resurgence. Neo Pets. Fucking hell.
Starting point is 00:30:18 They are killing it on socials. They've had all of these videos go viral and like it's just amazing and all these people all these millennials are commenting being like oh I can't get into my old account and they're like email this address we'll get you back into your account so you can feed your old neopet and play fucking fairy bubbles once more. It's huge news. It's really cool they're like getting people into their old accounts because they're like fuck that was eight email addresses ago. Like I cannot get into it.
Starting point is 00:30:46 Can whoever's doing that, the God's work at Neopets, do it at MySpace? Because I'd love to log into my old MySpace, but fucked if I know the username and log in. The email or anything, yeah. No, maybe they will. Maybe Tom will get on socials and- Pump it right up.
Starting point is 00:31:00 Yeah. But Neopets, yeah, okay. I just love to see it because I loved playing Neopets. It was such a highlight. And I remember like crowding around the family. Remember the days of the family computer, like in the lounge room. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:31:14 You know, cause you didn't have laptops then. Like. Gather around everyone. And so if you. Yeah. Bing bong, bing bong. And like if you had a friend over, it would be crowding around the same computer.
Starting point is 00:31:25 Yeah, huge use. Yeah, so I just like the nostalgia of that and also I just fucking love Neopets. So that really, that hit me hard. That is good news. Yeah. My love to say today, this is like coincidence chat. Uh-huh.
Starting point is 00:31:38 Sort of insurance engagement ring related. Okay. Now- Do they need to talk to my friend Michelle? Hannah. There's too many. Now I'm picturing a Hannah and a Michelle. Yeah, sorry. So, you're, I'm just trying not to out your future holiday, but you're going to the beach soon. Will you be wearing your ring on the beach? Oh, I hadn't even. Yeah, and that's why I'm getting ahead of the curve.
Starting point is 00:32:08 Oh, I hadn't even thought about it. Because. Okay, yeah. Could you imagine? Oh. No, I don't really want to. But so my ring is a bit big. And so I got, no one's ever said that to bit big and so I got
Starting point is 00:32:31 No one's ever said that to me before. So I got this like the diamonds that's a bit big. Well No, the actual ring is a bit actual ring is a bit like too big. So I got this like ring resizer It's like a little spiral coil thing that you like coil around. Yeah, just to pick it up a little bit. So now it doesn't move as much when I'm like. I've sent you a link and we'll play it on the YouTube show as well. This couple have lost the wedding ring or engagement ring. And they see a guy, which to be fair, I'd usually probably give a wide birth to.
Starting point is 00:33:02 He's on the beach with his metal detector. You know, just like looking for treasure or whatever. Yeah. And they go mate, it happened here can you name your reward if you can come and help us for a bit. Shall I hit play? Yes please. I got a big reward for you. You can help me find a ring. Huh? I got a big reward for you. You can help me find a ring. Let's go. I'll find it. Right there where that guy's standing. Let's go.
Starting point is 00:33:32 Is it gold? It's platinum. Diamond. Nice. I don't take any money by the way. So don't even try to even want it. Is it in this area? We're free. This is where the chair was. Like, I took it off and put sunscreen on like an idiot.
Starting point is 00:33:49 Can you move? Whose are these? Are these yours? Let me move these out of the way. We were here earlier today, but like, we were eating the boiled peanuts. And we were right near Fanny's. Can you just come over?
Starting point is 00:34:02 Sorry, I've just hit pause. We were eating boiled peanuts, and all of a sudden. Having to retrace your steps is how embarrassing. I saw this video the other day where this guy was driving his car and someone ran up the back of him, not his fault, but it goes to court for an insurance claim. But while he's there in the parked car, he's like hoofing down a sandwich and he's like spilt it on himself and he's just parked and this guy's driven out the back room and the comments like imagine
Starting point is 00:34:29 happening to watch this in court like alright please play the video for the jury and he's like he's covered in beetroot and buckin. Put that on the insurance claim because that's not going to come out. Yeah. One new Uniqlo t-shirt. And the arse end of a Honda Civic. Iconic. I like that little contraption. Something there. No way! Oh my god, have you found it? Might be, might not be. Is that it?
Starting point is 00:35:12 Is that it? That's a nice, that's a nice dag on the ring. Heavy too. Oh my god. I like, I don't even know you. You're welcome. You've all ruined, this all ruined. I don't even know you. You're welcome. You've all ruined us. This felt about ruined us. I've been crying for like hours.
Starting point is 00:35:28 Oh that's okay, I'm glad I could do that for you. Oh my god. Congratulations. No, no, no, no, no, seriously. I told you I'd find that. And right at the start of the year, the guy comes over and goes, big reward, and he goes, no, no, no. He's like, I just do this and,
Starting point is 00:35:45 and he's got his GoPro on. So obviously he's like, yeah, I'm gonna post some stuff to TikTok if I find cool shit or whatever. Yeah. That is so cool. Doesn't that just warm your heart though? Absolutely.
Starting point is 00:35:53 So I was watching this and I was like, what a nice old guy. They seem really excited and they're really scared and like, you know, happy couple in two weeks are gonna get married. And then I went, Tony's going to the beach soon. Take it off! Take take it off I don't know if you should take it off or secure it or whatever it is that you need to do but maybe in the ocean with the waves and
Starting point is 00:36:13 maybe just like I don't know but I just know but you also don't want to not enjoy yourself because you're worried about something as well like pop it in the drawer or something yeah buy a metal detector yeah 1000% I love a gadget why didn't I think of that? yeah you do I love a gadget oh that's actually we're fucking joking we are don't what the chances of Tony not having a metal detector in a month's time is fucking slim you can put it you can put it next to the stand-up paddleboard in the electric bike no well I'll take that to the beach with to the stand-up paddle board in the electric bike. No, well I'll take that to the beach with me, my stand-up paddle board and my metal detector. That's a match made in heaven.
Starting point is 00:36:50 They're only $249 on Amazon. It'll be here tomorrow. It would actually cost you money not to buy it. It literally would if I lost my ring. Yeah. It's insured. If I... Oh.
Starting point is 00:37:03 See ya! Yeah. It's insured. If I... Oh. Sue! We're not doing insurance fraud, obviously. Not when the cameras are on. So, question. Question. When, before Charles said that price, what were you thinking? Thousands. I thought 1500 minimum.
Starting point is 00:37:23 Oh, I would probably think 8-9 grand. Oh, you would. If the metal detector was 8 or 9 grand, would that be cheaper than the ring? Good on you. Well done, Torbs. Would you like it delivered to the office or your house? Um... Would it operate in the same postcode as Tony's ring or would it just be
Starting point is 00:37:48 fucking smoke coming out of the metal detector? The most expensive one I could find is 1600 so still not even... That is... no it can't be. You only need to find one nugget of gold and it's paid for itself. How much is gold worth? What's the price at the moment? Oh it fluctuates yeah but like a little bit of gold and it's paid for itself. How much is gold worth? What's the price? Yeah. But like a little bit of gold, they're not, it's not worth a lot. Like an actual like little gold nugget. Isn't it? Nah. It's 70 bucks.
Starting point is 00:38:14 For a little nug? Australia. And like my old uni lecturer, like the head of audio engineering at WAPR, he like used to go and like FOSIC for gold. And yeah, they made saxophones with them. That's really funny but that's brass. Like a really nerdy way to like correct you. Sorry. Okay we're going. We're going. Oh fuck are we still? Yes. Love you so much. Thank you so much for watching, listening, fuck and whatever you're doing. I have one more. For indulging me. Actually
Starting point is 00:38:44 don't even worry about it. I think there might be a few edits in that second half. Can I just say Donald Bradley has sent this through. I have a quick little... Oh my god I thought you were about to say Donald Bradman. I was like... He sent through and he says I'm alive! From the grave. It's a normal NA which we normally do on... on, it'll make sense why it's here. Okay. Normal or nah, freezing your face with a really awkward smile after saying goodbye until you figure out how to hang up the Zoom meeting. That was us on the Instagram live the other day.
Starting point is 00:39:18 Yeah. Are we doing this? So, if you're just the YouTube, we'll see you next Friday, but we are here every single day on Apple podcasts and Spotify so, um Bye Still there, bye. Oh, it's just the thing. Yeah. Sorry. Oh where's the button? Now streaming. What do you know about the happy face killer? He's my father.
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