Toni and Ryan - The Water in Vegas

Episode Date: January 11, 2024

We need to talk about returns and TERRIBLE make-goods we've received from brands. It's not good, friends 😂 LOVE YOU! xx [USED TO BE VIDEO EPISODE BUT NOT ANYMORE LOL TECHNICAL CHAT]Check out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toniandryanpodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast. My name is Dr. Ryan. Oh, Dr. Ryan. Dr. Tony Lodge here. No, I've just decided today. Sorry. Oh, yep. There's an emergency. They need both of us. Oh, no, actually. I don't do emergencies. I just do podcast approvals. We are calling Danielle, who is supposedly... Danielle! Danielle. She's supposedly in Massachusetts, but I think she might be...

Supposedly? Yeah, no, I think. What, do you think she's up to nefarious activity and lying where she is? She's scrambling the call. She's got a voice to code her on when we call. She's like, hello, it's Danielle. I think she's going offshore to celebrate, and I don't know if we're going to catch her before we leave

or we might be calling international waters. What's she celebrating? Let's find out. Hello? Danielle, it's Tony and Ryan. How's she celebrating? Let's find out. Hello? Danielle, it's Tony and Ryan. How are you doing? I'm doing great. How are you? I just told Tony that I think

you might be in Massachusetts or you might be travelling over international foreign waters because you're celebrating. Can you fill us in on where you are and what you're doing? And where's the body hidden, Daniel? The body is hidden here in Massachusetts. Great.

That's where I currently am. And in a couple of days, I am flying off to Belize with my wife to celebrate the fact that I've got a fancy new job. Oh, my God. Spend the money before you've made it. My kind of girl. Yeah. Total large energy. I've got a fancy new job. Oh, my God. Spend the money before you've made it. My kind of girl. Yeah. Total large energy.

I've just got a huge job. We can get whatever we want. I can pay for later. That's exactly right. Yeah, that's what happened. Then I got fired from Nova. Yeah. Yeah.

And she's over it. And I've let it go. Yeah, she's let it go. It's been fun. Oh, Danielle, what's the job? Well, so I am going to be managing an outpatient therapy clinic so i will be overseeing all of the therapists who work with patients incredible well i could help you danielle because i'm a doctor yeah tony's a doctor and i stupidly said i was before which is really inconvenient

while you're overseas if you need anyone to you know yeah tap it tap Yeah, tap in, yeah. Oh, tap me in. Is that an expression? You've got a job with me any time. Yeah. What's the – sorry. I didn't think one of Tony's ins for 2024 was going all in on sporting analogies that she didn't know what they were. Tap me – is it tap me in?

Tag me in. I have absolutely no idea. I'm with you, girl. None of us do. None of us do. None of us do. Okay, cool. All right, well, we'll prove this podcast, Danielle. Let's just nod and look cute and pretend like we know what we're doing.

Yep, nodding, looking cute. Yeah. Will you prove this podcast, Danielle? Absolutely, I will. Thank God. Hang up the phone. We ought to belize. You won't belize it.

Yeah. This is Danielle from Massachusetts, and I approve this podcast. All right, Happy New Year. Today is also a video show, so if you're listening on Spotify, you can also watch it on Spotify if you'd like. And you can put it on your smart TV. Happy bloody new year. It's 2024.

Technology is crazy. Yeah, it is insane. What's coming up today? Best-selling author, Dr Tony Lodge? We have discussed in the past, must have been last year, like a new age power move. Yeah. And someone's done it to me and we need to discuss it.

So you were the recipient of it. I was. I didn't pull the power move. The power move has been pulled on me and I can say no more. Can I ask one question? No. What is it? Is that the power move?

What's the question? I might not answer. Just overall, did you like it or did you feel uncomfortable? I felt uncomfortable that this person had this power over me. Oh, okay. We'll get there soon. First, what is wrong with this company's email offer? Do you need business experience to ascertain what the error is?

Because, as you know, I don't have a business. Well, you do now. You didn't for a while. Oh, we do have a business. I've got to make a call. You're accused of having a business for a while. I've got to let someone know. They'll be furious.

What is wrong with this company's offer? We're so confident you and your baby will love our cloth nappies. Oh. We offer a 30-day guarantee. As long as the nappies are unused and unwashed, just send them back and you'll get a full refund. Okay. Okay.

So this is an email that your wife, Bridget, received after ordering cloth nappies. Yes. Okay. So. We're so confident you and your baby will love our cloth nappies. Also, as if the baby's going to go like, yeah, mum, I love those ones. You know, the baby can't say anything.

Oh, you can tell when they don't like it, though. No, but you know what I'm saying? I hear what you're saying. Oh, your baby will love it and your baby goes, oh, yes. I look great. So soft on my booty. Yeah. God, my booty's really popping in this one.

Because you know how Mabel's bum looks so big? So big because of the nappy? Yeah, it's so cute. It's a really huge booty. Yeah, and she like shakes her butt because she does that a lot. She's real sassy. She shakes her butt and she, like, knocks stuff over. She knows what she's doing.

It's so cute. She knows what she's doing. Do you see any issues here? Okay, so the idea of, like, only being able to return something with, like, the tag still on I think is fine if it's, like, a dress or a T-shirt because, you know, like you get your parcel, you pop the T-shirt on, you go, oh, that doesn't really fit or I don't really like it or the colour isn't what I thought

it would be or whatever. You pop it back in. You can't test how good a nappy is without it being used? So are they playing us or are they playing themselves or is the system rigged? But also being like, well, there's no way you won't love it, but if you do it has to be unwashed, unsanitized. If they don't wear it, how do they know that I don't like it?

But also why are you so confident that it will be, like you're so confident it will be fine, but then all of a sudden. We've got Phoebe and James in here today. Our new team members who are already really causing a fuss. Yeah. It's not all about you, mate. My name's first. And if anyone's going to sneeze in here,

if anyone's going to sneeze in here, it's going to be fucking me. Okay. No, bless you. Anti-bless you. She only does one also. My name's first and if anyone's going to sneeze in here, if anyone's going to sneeze in here, it's going to be fucking me, okay? No, bless you. Anti-bless you. She only does one also. I think just the thing about a nappy is that like you need to know whether, like. I need to shit myself first.

Yeah. Then I'll know. Yeah. And then I'll send it back. It's a bit like swimwear, you know, when they send it and it's got the like, well, women's swimwear. I don't know if boys has it. But if you like buy a bikini online or you try one on in a shop or whatever, it comes with like a plastic sticker on the conch.

So if you've got any moisties. That's a new word. There's two new words. I didn't know that. Yeah. It makes sense when you. But isn't that in itself quite uncomfortable? There's two new words. I didn't know that. Yeah. It makes sense when you. Yeah. But isn't that in itself quite uncomfortable?

Well, you're supposed to try bathers on while you're wearing your knickies underneath. Is that a thing? But do people abide by that? Well, I mean, I do because I don't know that other people haven't. It's not to protect others. It's to protect me. It's to protect yourself.

Yeah, no, fair call. But, like, also. You don't know how it feels, right? Well, like, because there's, like, something making it, like, hard and, like, flat in the bottom. So it doesn't actually fit you. Yeah. Because there's, like, a nappy on the inside.

But, yeah, I think the thing with the nappy is that it needs to be shat in because otherwise you go, oh, like, they fit, but, like, do they leak? We won't know until after. No, I think that's bang out of order. That's out of order. Just say that you won't take a refund. And I think for a nappy, totally, they go, hey, they're nappies,

we know what they're for, no refunds. And I think everyone would go, yeah. Or you go, okay, well, we'll only test one, but we'll keep the other four clean so we could send the other four back. Maybe, yeah. I don't know. A lot of people are like, yeah, if it's too hard to get a refund, just don't offer it.

Don't offer it. Or just say, like, if you don't love it, here's a 5% discount to try a different one. You know, there's other ways of, like, getting repeat business. So a few tapas have shared their stories about when something wasn't quite right, how did the company try to make do? I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.

That's your one. That's your one. Bless you. Are you blessing Phoebe? Just once. Bless her properly and mean it. Bless you. It is a video show.

We all saw that eye roll. Yuri, who's a tarpa, was on a sexy holiday with her sexy partner and they got a sexy hotel and they were having a bit of a sexy time one afternoon. Sexy. When another couple walks into their room. Oh, my God, I would die. Yeah.

Turns out the hotel got all mixed up and gave both couples keys to the same room. Or did they? Sex hotel. Swingers party. They didn't realise. To apologise. Oh, okay.

Hang on. Before you tell me what it is, let me tell you what I would expect. Yep. Full refund in, like, the fanciest room. What's they go? Okay, here's all your money back and you're moving upstairs to the penthouse. And we'll put you in another or we'll give you a free dinner or something. Yeah.

That like that is refund areas for sure. Do you think? Like even if you weren't fucking, which they were. They were. Love that for you. You're in a hotel. Of course, you're going to be fucking someone or jerking off. Yeah.

Like it's the rule. What else would you do in a hotel? I actually don't know. I actually don't know. No. I actually don't know. Room service. I mean, getting fucked that way as well. Yeah, but you can do it.

Yeah, like, those things are all one and the same. You know what I mean? Like, getting room service, you're going to touch yourself. Yeah. You're probably going to, like, have a sick bath, touch yourself in the bath. Yeah. All that stuff. Get out, rehydrate.

Yeah, yeah, have a Gatorade, touch yourself again. Like, it's fine. Yeah, we get it. But, like, someone, even if you were in there reading, someone walking into your room is, like, a fucking not okay. Yeah. And just, like, they would have to do a massive refund, surely. To apologise, the hotel gave us a free bottle of water.

Rehydrate. Yeah, they get it. You are freaking joking. Well, at first I was like, that's pretty offensive. But then after we toured the US, you see what they're charging for bottled water? Water is expensive. Yeah, it's probably a $300 gift.

In Las Vegas. Yeah. So we, I mean, we had, we were in this new wing of the hotel, which was apparently so fancy. A bit too new. Yeah. Nothing was fixed yet. I think I told the story on the pod that all like my.

You flooded the bathroom. My bathroom. I woke up like 5 a.m. The whole bathroom was flooded. And I said to you, the water in here is not right. Like I wouldn't drink it. I reckon that's why we were sick. Me too.

I genuinely think that that's why we were sick. Me too. I genuinely think that that's how we got sick. Anyway, buying a bottle of Fiji water in Las Vegas, it was $23 US for a litre bottle. I'm not even joking. It's like $40 or $50. And when you had 87 margaritas the night before, heaven forbid you need to drink a fucking water the next morning. You know what I'm saying?

And so I spent more money buying water than I did on anything else while we were in Vegas. And that is saying something because everything else is expensive too. That's because you were just being a hot girl, letting all the boys buy your drinks. Yeah, I was. And that 80-year-old lady, Lorraine. Yeah, she gave me some of her money. I don't know. I hope she's okay. I hope she's still alive, drinks. Yeah, I was. And an 80-year-old Lady Lorraine. Yeah, she gave me some of her money.

I don't know. I hope she's okay. I hope she's still alive, yeah. Nah, not okay. I agree with you. That is expensive. But a bottle of water. Name and shame.

What was the hotel? I'll never stay at that hotel train again. Yuri, let us know. Yeah. Let us know. Because that is redonko. Yuri says, is it the worst make good ever? Or are they implying I was a thirsty bitch? They go, we know what you must be doing up there.

We'll give you a Gatorade and a bottle of water. Not even a wine? Not even a bottle of wine or champagne or something? Champ is in a prawn cocktail. Well, champagne just seems like such an easy win because they, it costs them nothing. They buy it in bulk, but they charge a fortune. Yeah.

And it feels right. You know, a champagne like, oh, we're so sorry. Let us lux up your night. Nah, that's. I tell you what's fancy that that doesn't happen as much anymore is when they put the champagne in like an ice bucket. Doesn't that just make you feel fancy? But do you ever order champagne while you're out? No.

I do because I really like it or like sparkling wine. I just can't. Well, you're not from the French town of Champagne. Exactly. I'm just a sparkling. Yeah. But the thing is about Champagne is that they do do that, but you just probably don't order it.

Or normally if someone orders Champagne out, you just order a glass. So if like multiple people ordered Champagne, they bring the bottle. If you've got a bottle, they do the bucket, yeah. But even in the hotel, like bring up a bottle of champagne. It just feels cool. Do you remember when we were at the QT in Sydney and they- Oh, they did. Yeah, there was a tarpa that was working there that sent us like a heap of drinks

and they send it in an ice bucket. I think I did at the time, but I would like to take this opportunity again to apologise to the great folks at the QT in Sydney. One of their lamps was shaped like a hat, so I put the hat on and burnt my hair and the whole floor smelled like burnt hair. I can't believe we didn't set the fire alarm off. I filmed it. I've got the video.

I'll post it in today's episode thread. No, don't. It was awful. I'll post it in today's episode thread. No, don't. It was awful. I'll post it in today's episode thread. It is hilarious. I can still taste that smell. Oh, it was just, and I was like, oh, I think that might be on and warm. And you're like, yeah, you could taste it.

Yeah. Morgan had an allergic reaction to some jelly beans and her mum messaged the company to like find out the ingredient list, find out what it was. Absolutely. Because you go, I just need to know what to avoid in the future. Yeah. They replied, sorry, our product wasn't up to our normally high standards.

We've included a whole box of jelly beans that hopefully you'll love. Morgan says, are they trying to kill me? Well, yeah. A bit of a reaction. Can't get sued if they're dead. Well, yeah. Yes, you can reaction. Can't get sued if they're dead. Well, yeah. Yes, you can. That's actually definitely you can.

I don't want more of the product that, like. I think Christina's from the same town. Oh, no. We ordered three pizzas, two normal base, one gluten-free base. But when they arrived, there was no, usually they write gluten-free on the box or something. There's no markings. They all kind of look the same. So it seemed they'd forgotten to do the gluten-free on the box or something. There's no markings. They all kind of look the same.

So it seemed they'd forgotten to do the gluten-free one. Yeah. We called the store and they said, oh, sorry about the error. You keep that pizza. And to make up for a mistake, we'll send around a free garlic bread. So more gluten. They're sending for free. Christina also says, are they also trying to kill me?

Let's send you some more gluten. Yeah. And then take some toxic jelly beans. This is Danielle from Northampton, Massachusetts, and you are listening to Tony and Ryan. A massive shout-out to a few of our champion tapas, Brandon P. Good on you, Brandy. Thanks, Brandon.

Lavinia, Ben Scott, Jacob Clark and Kevin Beal. Good on you. Thank you so much. There's some of our champion tapas, Tony and Ryan. Speaking of tapas. No. I've got. Good on you. Thank you so much. They're some of our champion tapas. Tapas? Tony and Ryan. Speaking of tapas. No. I've got.

Hang on. Are you? Tony and Ryan podcast. Sorry. During the break, we were just talking about having sex in hotels. And Tony's just all revved up. Need a ciggy. My private.

My private. My private. I'd say the semi-secret project in Patreon I did this week. Secret project? Because I mentioned it on Monday and I can tell you half of it. Okay. I can reveal half of it to you now. Myself and the people in Patreon.

Can I just pause here? I don't know if I can deal with another secret project of yours. After yesterday, I think that I don't want to be kept in the dark on anything. I think I want to be kept across every single thing that goes on in this business non-business. Yesterday was, you're 100% correct because from yesterday, and if you're just joining us for the first time yesterday,

I pitched Tony B. Live dicks. Live dicks. A dick whisperer guessing if people wear hoodie or helmet with them. You know what? In a robe here in the studio. Listen yesterday. You have to.

If you dare. If you dare. I think I should be commended for not just arranging it, because what I was doing was asking and bringing you into the loop. Absolutely. Yeah, actually, great point. Because you'd rather nip it in the bud before I, like, wheel the dicks in.

Don't take nip it in the bud. Before I wheel the loop. Absolutely. Yeah, actually, great point. Because you'd rather nip it in the bud before I, like, wheel the dicks in. Don't take nip it in the bud. Before I wheel the dicks in. Yeah, that's a good point. Continue with your secret project. So people in Patreon and I have created Tony Bingo for 2024. What's that? What's Tony Bingo? Do I get to play?

Well, you're the ultimate player. I'm already playing. You are playing it right now. So there is a whole bunch of things that we've predicted you will say or do over 2024. No, I don't like that. Oh, that's what I was going to say. No, I thought.

Are you going to do that every time I do it? I don't think so. Because you. Maybe we'll have to come up with like a secret emoji that people put in the episode thread just to be like, I'm sure I'm not. Oh, okay. So should I start just saying really whack stuff? No, because we've made predictions on knowing you and your character, what we predict that you'll say or do in 2024.

And then the goal is for us, and we can't like cheat or sway the jury. We have to just let the year play out. And I actually don't know what it is. You don't know what it is. Are we playing for anything? I don't know yet, but I think obviously we'll tick them off as we go. But the big challenge is by the end of the year, will we have ticked off the whole board?

Okay. And I don't know where we'll get to. But I think that's. I bet you on that board is shitting in my car and I fucking won't give it to you. I promise. Maybe there. Would you like to place a bet that we won't? Like, I don't know. I think you're right.

There should be, we don't have to come up with it now, but I feel like you're right. There needs to be some sort of prize or. Yeah. Like, I think if I do all the things, you should get a prize for knowing me that well. That's what I mean, yeah. That's an amazing feat.

But I don't think I should win anything if you don't get it. Like I don't think that I should. It's not like a bet. It's just like what should we do if we. Maybe we'll think of something fun. Yeah, we'll think of something fun. So who created this list? Well, together I said what should I put on the board.

Yeah, in the Patreon. And then there was a lot of similar themes. A lot of people said something similar. I went, oh, okay, you're onto something here.? Yeah, in the Patreon. And then there was a lot of similar themes. A lot of people said something similar. I went, oh, okay, you're onto something here. But it was in the Patreon. In the Patreon. And we picked 16 final things. Here are the 16 things for the year.

Have you seen them, Phoebe? I have. What do you reckon? Do you reckon they can do it? I think they know you very well. Yeah, very well. Very well. I like that. very well. Yeah, very well. Very well. I like that.

Very well. That's really fun. I just, I won't, because I don't want to ruin it. Well, you can't because you're not there. But I can't wait until the end of the year when I can look at the whole list. Yeah, gotcha. Like, and see what people said that I would do, because it is like a real testament to how well people have known me.

Well, maybe we should reveal them as you tick them off. We won't reveal the ones you haven't done yet, but maybe as they happen. I reckon. Figure it out. I'm still figuring it out. Yeah, but I love the idea. That's so fun. If you'd like to join Patreon, you will be able to go in today and see.

And get a board. And see the 16 things and you can tick them off. Oh, so the only people that can see the board are the people in Patreon. Yeah. Oh, spicy girls. Yeah. All right. Okay.

So I mentioned before. Oh, saying that was a All right. Okay. So I mentioned before. Oh, saying that was a bingo. No. I mentioned before that sometime last year we talked about like a new age power move. And I think also it must be said credit where credit is due. The idea of a power move I think has been popularized obviously by Hamish and Andy. If you haven't heard of this, it's kind of like things that you would do socially that you obviously and you go,

oh, that is a power move that you've done that. Like one that I heard recently was, oh, it's like being taller than somebody but like. Standing over them a little bit. Yeah, but they're funny. They're not supposed to be nasty. They're supposed to be like a funny power move. But so there's this old business cliche one,

go shake my hand and you turn your hand so your hand's on top. Oh, okay. And it's just like a real, like, I'm on top here. Right. So it's kind of stuff like that where you just assert your dominance like a little bit. Yeah, just to let everyone know who's where on the here. Right. So it's kind of stuff like that where you just assert your dominance like a little bit. Yeah, just to let everyone know who's where on the hierarchy. Yeah, and I think especially in like a business situation,

you kind of go like, oh, I'm going to be the one like calling the shots. Even just like an overly firm handshake in itself is a bit of a- Or like a really nasty eye contact. Like, you know, when you meet someone for the first time and it's an intense eye contact, not like a, hi, nice to meet you. It's like a, nice to meet you. I'll tell you my funniest one from Hamish and Andy is they go, oh, Tony, what do you do for a living?

I do a podcast. Oh, that was my backup plan. Exactly. Right? Like this is perfect. Perfect. Oh, you're still doing that? Oh, I didn't know that.

I still do the podcast. But what are you doing for money, you know? I know you're doing that for fun, like on the weekends. What do you do for your actual job? And what do you do for work? Yeah. But anyway, so the idea of a power move, I think it's quite simple, but very effective.

Okay. And the person who pulled this power move on me is someone very close to me. Can you name names? Someone I trust with my life who I'd never expect to do this. Was it me? It was. I power moved you? You did.

And you didn't like it? From the look on your face, I'm guessing that you don't know what i'm talking about no you don't know what i'm talking about i'm embarrassed now i feel you don't know the power move that you pulled on me over the break over the break wasn't it during work time so maybe you know we don't have to take it to hr was it um rug or outdoor furniture related nope okay nope because i did a power move apparently is giving your friend free furniture that's not Um, rug or outdoor furniture related? Nope. Okay. Nope. Because I did a power move apparently is giving your friend free furniture. That's not what I just said.

I just want to put that on the record. I just wanted everyone to know that I gave Tony a rug and some outdoor furniture. I love that you're backpedaling before you even know what it is. Um, um, fuck. Was it something to do with the... This feels like the Power Move. This is the Power Move. Yeah, I didn't mean to do this. Okay, what the Power Move is, is you accuse someone of doing something bad.

And they name all the bad shit that they've done to you. And they just mentally crumble. They crumble. Was it Suzuki Jimny related? No. Was it Christmas or Christmas present related? No. This is good though.

I like this. Was it a saying something like, was it about like come round? No. Okay. Because I did invite Tony around and then didn't. Yep. But you could have invited yourself over. A few times.

You know that. Oh, yeah, I would have. No, but like way past that stage. You're shopping. You're shopping. I would have just been like, oh, it's hot today. Can I come through in your pool? Actually do that. We love that. Like I but we're past that stage. You're shopping. I would have just been like, oh, it's hot today. Can I come through in your pool? Actually do that.

We love that. Like I would actually just do that. So that's fine. You do the same with the spa? Yeah. Yeah. I want to be in a house without a baby in it for a few hours. Yeah.

Mate, you come on over. Work stuff. I need urgent work help. Sonya, can you call me back and say it's for work? Yeah. Call me out with an emergency. No, none of those. This makes me feel physically ill.

Last year. Don't. We talked about the power move of turning on red receipts in iMessage. Have I done that? Are you telling me that you don't know that you've done this? Yeah. On the 23rd of December, I sent Ryan a hot as fuck selfie. Oh, I know the selfie.

Yeah, I bet you do. Looked at it a few times, I bet. Yeah. You know when you send someone a text in iMessage and it says delivered? I send the selfie. It goes delivered. Yep. And send the selfie. It goes delivered. Yep. And then read immediately.

And I go, who's turned on red receipts? Have I? And then you didn't reply for a little bit. How do I unturn off red receipts? Well, I thought that you'd done this on purpose. No, I didn't do that. Look at that. See, so this isn't the text messaging question.

This is just our conversation. We made yesterday. Yeah. And you haven't replied. I haven't replied to that one either, yeah. You turned on red receipts on our message and I could not believe and I thought this close to Christmas you've done this to me. To you.

First of all, I don't know how I've done that. Second of all, even if I did, I wouldn't have done it to you. I would have just turned them on. So your story's changing because just then you said, I don't know how I've done it. No, I didn't do it to you. I just turned them on. No, I said if I had done it on.

Because what I'm saying is me changing and setting my phone isn't doing something to you. Because you can do it to just one person. Really? You can, yeah. So if you click on their icon, see there where it says, like, you can toggle on send red receipts. Hide alert, send red receipts, share focus status.

So, like, you know if I'm on Do Not Disturb and you go to text me and it says, like, Tony is in Do Not Disturb? Yeah. Yeah, that's like so I can send you that so that you know, like, that I'm not going to see it. Not going to reply, yeah. Yeah. Which I fucking rate, by the way.

I rate Do Not Disturb. Yeah. It is good because then you're like, oh, they're busy doing something. Well, I just know that then you can text me and I won't, it's not going to bother me, but I'll still see it when I'm, anyway. Okay, so this is all new to me. Okay. And I'm not actually fucking with you.

Get your phone out. I want to see if you've done this to everyone or just to me because I almost fell out of my Uber when I sent you this hot as fuck selfie and then I get the red receipt and nothing back. I fell out of my Uber. I was in the Uber and I'm like. I almost fell into a taxi again. I almost fell out of another taxi. I'm in the Uber on the way to French. I almost rolled into a taxi again. I almost fell out of another taxi.

I'm in the Uber on the way to Friend Christmas. I almost rolled another ankle. I don't have any more to roll. I don't know what you need to look at, babe. I'm sitting in the back of the Uber on the way to Friend Christmas, looking hot as fuck, like really feeling myself. And I just pops up. Oh, is Friend Christmas what that was for?

Yeah. And it just pops up red. And I went, it was like I was waiting for a boy that I liked to like, like my Instagram story or something. Well, I am a boy that you like and you were waiting. I mean, it was like I was waiting for a boy that I liked to like my Instagram story or something. Well, I am a boy that you like and you were waiting. I mean, you're pinned? You're my number one pin. You're in front of my wife.

This makes up for it, I think. You're my number one pinned as well. Really? Yeah. Torps isn't even pinned. Why is James, who just started working with us, naked? Oh, well, that's work-related, so that's private. Is that your emoji?

What the fuck was that? Send red receipts. You've toggled it on. Is it on for everyone? I've just gone into your wife's. No red receipts. It's a conspiracy. Try a third person.

Okay. Because I want to know which one's the anomaly out of you or my wife. Okay, I'm going to go to Phoebe, our new team member. Okay. No red receipts. So I have turned them on for you. You've turned them on only for me. It's not looking good for you, mate.

There's no way that was an accident. Well, if you had said, can you turn on or off red receipts, I wouldn't have been able to show you how to do it until you, mate. There's no way that was an accident. Well, if you had said, can you turn on my offering receipts, I wouldn't have been able to show you how to do it until you showed me. I'll be honest, though. Did you do it? No. Before I left for Christmas, you were like, I'm going to turn this on. No, no, no.

Because heaven forbid I needed something to talk about on the first Friday back. But you know what I will say, right? So I got this and I was like, oh, that's so stressful. Like, because then I know that I've sent you something. James, get that clip and put it on the end of everything. Every single thing that I've ever said. Put it on my fucking tombstone. That was very stressful.

Yeah, life. That was very stressful. It's got the dates, 1993 to 2025. That was very stressful. Yeah, I'll be dead next year. No, mortgages, mate. Yeah. Life's expensive.

I've got 28 years to go. It's hard because he lives. No. So at first, right, I'm like, I wasn't angry, but I was like, fuck, what a power move. That's so stressful. And I was going to message you back and go, like, read receipts. Fuck, that's rough.

Then I was like, no, I'll save that because five eps a week. But at first I was like, that's really annoying because now I'm going to see that you've read something and like not replying because I'm so neurotic. But then it was actually awesome because you know what I realized? When you don't reply for like three hours, you actually haven't read the message. You never look at something and then don't reply. Except for the selfie. Must have been jerking it.

Well, the thing about the selfie is I literally, I remember I was sitting on the couch. Naked. Naked. Hard as a rock. Hard as a rock. I reckon if you had a camera on me, and I know this is hard for people just listening today, but this is the visual,

like this is what you would have seen. Phone back down. And just carry it on with it. And you know what? I reckon you posted on Instagram straight after. Yeah, I don't think you liked it. No, but I think I commented and liked it. No, I don't think you did.

I could look at the receipts on that. You love a receipt. Yeah, I'll fucking check my receipts over here. I'll check my receipts on that one. Oh, it won't be hard to find it. So hot. Such a hot selfie. Okay, I'll fucking check my receipts over here. I'll check my receipts on that one. Oh, it won't be hard to find it. So hot. Such a hot selfie. Okay, hang on. This is not good audio. Where is it? Here we

go. Oh, turns out I do. I haven't liked it. You just liked it. I just got the notification. I did. Ryan John likes your comments. Red. No. Let me just type. Looking good, no. Red. No. Let me just type. Looking good, sweetheart.

Holly. Shit. So hot. Too hot to text back. And if everybody could go and like Ryan's comment, that would be awesome. She got gassed up on this pic, though, didn't she? I did get gassed up, actually.

It wasn't good for my health. My head almost fucking popped open. Yeah, I was trying to. You were trying to save me from myself. Oh, my God. Steph Claire Smith called you gorgeous. I know. The hottest person alive is like Tony Lodge is hot.

I know. Yeah, it's framed on my wall. Georgie Young liked it, the person making you a wedding dress when you finally get fucking proposed to. That's a nice on my wall. Georgie Young liked it, the person making you a wedding dress when you finally get fucking proposed to. That's a nice touch. I love Georgie Young. Anyway, so the red receipts, I think they can stay. Would you like me to reciprocally, would you like me to turn mine on?

First of all, let's not push on and pretend that reciprocally is a word. And second of all, you can do whatever you like. Third, I just want it to be on the record that the amount of trust we have for each other, that we were just giving each other our phones. Not a lot of people would do that. Oh, 100%. But, like, a lot of people wouldn't do that.

Oh, no, I trust you. Yeah, I trust you. Yeah. Like, a lot. Like, I trust you heaps. I would tell you anything, and I don't. Yeah. But not just on the pod. And often I don't heaps. I would tell you anything, and I do. Yeah. But not just on the pot.

And often I don't even ask. Fuck you. You know what? No. No, okay. All right. Well, you know. I apologise for the power move.

No, no, no, no. That's okay. If you didn't mean to do it, I mean, it's still not great, but you didn't mean to do it. I'm sorry that it caused you a lot of stress on your break. No, it was actually awesome because I could see whether you'd actually read something and I wasn't like...

Panicking. Hanging around. How can I live knowing if Ryan saw this photo or not? The selfie, it was so hot. I've got to love to see it here. Please. And I don't want to say this is the start of a theme, but I... Okay.

Tapa Ian sent this through. He gave me the intel. Ian, are you fucking kidding? No, Ian Ottoms. Oh. Read receipt. Actually, I'm going to send this to you. Okay.

Well, you'll know that I've read it. No. A horse has won the Leopardstown Christmas Festival in Dublin, which is like a horse racing museum. Fuck, that's a lot of words. Yeah. Leopardstown horse racing in Dublin. And when they say it in Scotland, you couldn't fucking pronounce it anyway.

But tell me what the name of the horse is. Oh, the horse's name is Carla Conti. Yep, straight up. You are joking. Carla Conti wins day one of the Leopardstown Christmas Festival in Dublin. That's amazing. There's a picture of this, like, on the screen. Can we do that?

Yeah. New person James, can we do that? Is that possible? We can. Great. Yep. There you go. It's there somewhere.

That's amazing. Carla fucking Conti. Carla fucking Conti. That's amazing. And what a Carla Conti. That's so good. What do you love to say, Tony Lodge? So I know that earlier this week I did a coincidence chat that you absolutely hated for my love to say it,

but I hope that you like this one. So I posted this in Patreon, so you might have actually seen it. This is a great clip, yep. When we were in the USA, we went to Canada and we did a meet and greet there. It was actually our biggest one, the one that we did in Toronto. We were in the cold for many, many hours. But that morning I woke up like really early.

It was like 5 or 6 a.m. And I booked a car and drove all the way to Niagara Falls, which was like an hour and a half away or something. Plus traffic. Plus traffic. And back before a five-hour meet and greet. And back before the meet and greet because I really desperately wanted to see Niagara Falls. And I actually

said to you, do you want to come? And you were like, nah, I don't really know why you so desperately want to go, but that's fine. Anyway, and I ended up going down there. And the reason I really wanted to go was just before my mum got sick, like a few months before my mum found out she had cancer,

she was in the USA for her brother's 50th birthday it was like a big family trip they all went yeah wow and um and they went to Toronto or they went to Canada and they went to Niagara Falls and um they were on the Canadian side just like we were and in my I remember this photo of mum standing in front of the falls um and I was like oh i want to try and take the same photo but i didn't have a copy of it um anyway and like i went it was like really emotional it was really nice it was such a great experience um and then but i didn't have the photo so i was like oh hopefully i got it like um and then i was behind me it'll be similar and then um

i got like this weird charge on my bank account and it was for Dropbox and I hadn't seen it before and I was like, $18 a month for Dropbox? Like, what the fuck? I don't even use Dropbox. Is everyone getting a hearing? Fucking hell. What's the financing thing of just throwing $18 a month? Anyway, and I saw it for the first time and I was like, holy shit.

Anyway, and I log in and my login works. And in this Dropbox is this photo of my mum at Niagara Falls. It's the exact photo. I've just sent it to you. I just sent it to you in a text and we'll pop it up on the screen. But you kind of had a, you just knew that this photo kind of existed. So it was just in my memory. I knew that there was this photo of my mum and I was like, hopefully I'm in the right spot.

Hopefully, like, we're kind of doing the same face and whatever. And I've just sent it to you and everyone that's watching the episode on Spotify today can see it. And coincidence chat, what, 12 years apart? Yep, about that, yeah. You guys are standing in the exact same spot. Yeah. Crazy.

And, like, she's obviously there in fucking summer because she's only wearing a T-shirt. I'm wearing a hat, a scarf, a puffer jacket. No, I think don't tell them which season is which and everyone can guess. See if you can figure it out. But, like, just by chance, like, I am actually standing, like, in the exact same spot.

Crazy. But, yeah, and I just, like, it made me, I could not believe it. Like, I had not seen that photo since it was taken. So when I read the blog post in Patreon, I didn't know that you didn't have the original picture. Oh. And I thought you were doing, like, shit coincidence chat. No, I.

Guys, would you believe it? We're both standing in front of it. And I was like, oh, fuck. Yeah, here we go. And then I read the thing. Because I usually, you just look at the pictures. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then, yeah, I mean, how uncanny is that?

I just can't believe that I got the, like, the exact same photo. Yeah. As her. And, like, yeah, I had no idea. There's even, like, a boat in the same spot in the water. Can you see that same rock sticking out? It's crazy. Like it's honestly insane.

You'll have to see that. And yeah, you'll have to see that. I just wanted to share that because it made me, I just could not believe the luck that I found that photo. Yeah. Because I would have just closed that Dropbox down and gone like, oh, well, I don't need that. I'm too scared to get rid of old folders and photos in case something like this happens.

Your mum dies. Don't say that. Oh, Mandy will be listening. Why would you say that? No, Mandy, she's going to live forever. Well, hopefully she'll be listening. Maybe she won't be listening because she's dead. She's already dead.

Maybe. She's away this week. Where is she? Heaven. They don't come back. Don't they? Not in my experience. Not a return ticket.

Anyway. That's a real shame. But experience. Not a return ticket. Anyway. That's a real shame. But, yeah, you'll have to see that. I just wanted to share that because it made me so happy when I found it. On Monday. Now, a study has come out that said which side of the bed you sleep on says a lot about you and your personality. And I just got to read the headline and went, oh, yeah.

And then I read the things and I was like, oh. Okay. So on Monday I'll tell you what that means for you. And also because we were talking about this, Atapa has shared some very disturbing news about how they sleep and I don't think anyone's going to like it. So we won't be able to sleep after we hear this. Yeah, exactly.

So enjoy the sleep this weekend because that could be it. But we'll chat to you on Monday. Love you. Bye.