Toni and Ryan - THROWBACK: Toni's Dryer

Episode Date: May 14, 2023

Dryer Drama with throwback host Producer Cam! Love ya! xo Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey there, it's Producer Cam. It's your throwback episode and you are listening to the Tony and Ryan podcast. Hello and happy Monday. Welcome to another throwback episode of the Tony and Ryan podcast. It's Producer Cam taking you through for the week. Ryan is on baby leave and Tony is in the Mediterranean, I think. So I'm here to help out. Coming up today, Tony finally got a dryer delivered. You wouldn't believe what the pricks did to her. But first, let's jump into would you dump them? You wouldn't believe what all these people are going to say.

Take it away. Originally, I was going to call this reasons boys dumped girls. Oh. But I think I'm going to change it to flapped boys because these guys have got themselves into situations and I reckon you'll be with them, Toni. Ooh, okay. And you're like, this is awkward.

I don't like this. I don't want to be here. I didn't want to be in this situation. Are these all people from our Facebook group or are these just like stories you've had on BuzzFeed? Like where did you? A random mix of Reddit Tarpers tweets. Right.

Okay. Because you know how sometimes it's, like, easy to comment when it's far away but then when it's Tarpers I'm like, you're our friends. Why are you doing this wrong? Like, you feel like you're able to be like, hang on. Well, I reckon you'll be on the boys' side, so I don't think it'll matter anyway.

Oh, okay. One bloke. And there's names out of this because... Okay. In fact, this whole... It's an anonymous dumping segment. Yeah. Fuck, that sounds brutal. This girl I was dating was super lovely

to me, super lovely to our friends, to my family and everyone. Starting well. Right. Yeah. Except she randomly turned into this super rude bitch to wait staff, cashiers and all customer service people. Nah. See ya.

I would cringe going anywhere because it was so embarrassing when she treated people so poorly. And do you get second-hand embarrassment? I'm embarrassed. I've got third-hand now. You feel like you have to apologise for that person's behaviour and that's not okay. No, and I also think if you're with them,

it's almost like you're like rude by association. Yeah, it's like you're on their side. You want to go, hey, I know my friend's being a real bitch, but I, like, don't condone this. But then you don't want to, like, take sides with the waitress because then your girl's going to turn on you and freak you up. Have you ever been out for dinner or whatever with somebody who was like that, like whether it was like a colleague

or a friend that was rude and you were just like, I want to die? Yes. What did you do? It's very uncomfortable. Like because you kind of, yeah, you don't want them to get flapped with you. I have in that situation later apologised or like felt like I needed to explain and sort of, oh, like we were

in here the other day. Oh, I'm really sorry about that. Yeah. Or if the person that you're with is like facing the other way and the waiter's kind of looking at you and you kind of go, sorry, you do the mouth sorry. Or maybe, and I probably think it's subtle at the time, but it's probably not, when I'll try to like make up for it.

Oh, yeah. So you're overthinking. Oh, thank you so much for up for it. Oh, yeah. So you're overthinking. Oh, thank you so much for the service today. That's gorgeous. It's great. Really appreciate it. And then they probably think that you're just a prick anyway. Yeah.

They're like, well, if you want to make me feel better, stick up for the person that you're with. Tell your mates to shut the fuck up. So we're with the bloke on this one because he moved on. Oh, totally. He just went, I can't do this for the rest of my life. No, that's awful. And people that are rude to wait staff or people that are rude to anybody

but especially people that are trying to help you in a shop or serving you in a cafe or something, like how shit is your life that you get off being a cock to somebody who's just doing their fucking job? Thank you. Like how fucking unfulfilled are you that you are like power tripping over somebody that's got a job that's like less than yours? Like fuck off. I'm not better than anyone.

I'm worse than most people. I know I've been accused of bringing some boomer energy to the show. It says a lot more about them than it does about the waitress. Yeah, but imagine being a waitress, walking home every night and you're like, God, they were just a prick to me. That's an asshole. Yeah, you don't want that. Have you seen that?

The TikTok trend and it's the people that work in restaurants or juice bars or whatever and they go, Bella Hadid came into my restaurant and she was a 9 out of 10. She was so kind. Kylie Jenner came in and she was a 4 out of 10. She wasn't kind or whatever. Really? And they like rate celebrities.

Do you reckon that if there's a real prick celebrity that comes into your shop, you're like, I'm not going to fucking listen to your podcast. I'm not going to fucking buy your product. I'm not going to follow you on Instagram. I reckon that would happen a lot. Yeah, yeah. Just really rub them up the wrong way.

Yeah, and like take your version of a stand being like fine fuck you. Next flapped boy. I've been dating this girl for a month or so and she told me to come hang out with her on the weekend. Oh. And I was like oh cool.

We're planning. We're both like Star Trek fans. So he was like watch a bit of Star Trek, eat some food, maybe a bit of afternoon delight, just a real settle-in couple-y Sunday. That's cute. That is really cute. So I show up in a hoodie, sweats, and I've got a bag of Doritos because he knows what he's there for.

But also you're settling in. What are you going to rock up in jeans? Fuck off. No way. I roll in and her entire extended family is there. Mm-hmm. It turns out they wanted to like, her included, like test me and see what I was like.

Test me? Oh, my God. Now, he said, you know, he's a person that likes Star Trek. He's a bit awkward in front of new people and he's a bit like, oh, like. And also what a hoodwink situation. Oh, yeah, just me and you, sweetheart. And then. They made him hold a baby.

If you just turned up, if I said, hey, come around, and you rocked up in your trackies with a bag of Doritos. Yeah, which I have done. Many a time. Sometimes invited. And there's like 25 people there to like judge you and you're like oh this is her give her a baby see if she's good with it oh the girlfriend starts getting weird because he's a bit freaked and she's a bit like hey perform and

be nice to everyone because i'm trying to like show you off and prove that you're great to the family because they're like judging you right now so he's freaking out and then she's freaking out because he's freaking out and he's like, this is why I'm, like, a social, like, this is why we hang out just us because I don't like this. But also if you're meeting a family, you can, like, G yourself up a bit. Yeah. And you can put energy into being, like, cool, I'm meeting grandma.

I'm holding a baby. I'm fucking, you know, Celeste and John, they've just had a baby and I'm going to probably fucking have to hold it. You can kind of, like, put all of your energy into the one afternoon. I've got two hours tomorrow to deliver and I'm going to roll in hot and I'm going to kiss the baby, I'm going to dance with Grandma, I'm going to have a shandy, then I'm going to fuck off home. Yeah, and then I can just fucking fall in a heap because I'm done.

Don't surprise me with that. You can't surprise people with that. But for me, because I am quite good with people. Yeah, you'd work the room. Yeah, I can be charismatic when I want to be. So I feel like that probably wouldn't freak me out. But, yeah, that's a freaky situation. For example, my boyfriend Torbs would not like it if I was like, oh, yeah,

we're just going to go out for dinner. And then my whole fucking family was there. Or, you know, a new group of friends or something, he'd be like, why didn't you just tell me, bro? Bridget, my wife's nightmare would be a surprise party. Yeah. Gets home and is like, happy birthday surprise. No.

No. Three weeks notice. Yep. I need to know what to wear. Yep. Because I've, you know, got a bit of an ankle showing from these cut-off jeans, I'm going to have to probably shave that part of my legs.

Yep. She would be worried about the hair wash schedule as well. The hair wash schedule. Oh, if I'd known these people were coming around, I would have organised some food and I would have cooked for everyone. Tidy up the house a bit. There's some washing on the chair or whatever. Yeah.

Nightmare. Yeah. He left her. She goes, why are we so weird around my family? And he's like, I've told you I don't like to be surprised by stuff. I've told you I'm a bit awkward. You've crossed boundaries, bro. I'm out.

And when you're with a boyfriend or a girlfriend or any partner, you're supposed to be a united front. Yeah. She's fucking cut him loose. Yeah, I don't like that either. Yeah, I'm flapped. Yeah. No, that doesn't mean.

Yeah. Now this one, I reckon it's going to sound strange, but I reckon this happens way more than't mean. Yeah. Now this one, I reckon it's going to sound strange, but I reckon this happens way more than people think. Okay. I dated this girl for years, but I suspected she didn't really like me, like actual me. She just liked the archetype of what I represented. Oh, yeah.

Kind of like my brand was suited her brand quite well. Good on paper, but not actually a good relationship. Yeah. Not in a bad way, but it was like, oh, there wasn't the complete spark, but she was like, oh, I look cool next to this guy. You suit my aesthetic. Identity and personality. Yeah. So I think that's very common. This is where it gets a little bit more specific.

Okay. I think that's very common. This is where it gets a little bit more specific. Okay. Yeah. I grew out of listening to folk music. He liked folk music in high school and college, but, you know, you grow up and your musical taste change.

But he was like the folk music guy. Oh. And I think that she thought it was cool that her boyfriend was like a folk music guy. Did she? I mean, they're out there. Good for you. Yeah. Everyone's got someone, yeah.

So when I grew out of folk music and he used to be into country music as well and kind of grew out of that, she asked, why can't you just still like folk music? Why can't you still like country music? And like obviously he didn't just, like, wake up one morning and change his personality, but people grow and evolve. Yeah. And I used to like other sort of movies and now like these sort of,

like it's normal, right? Totally, yeah. Or you just, like, make a new friend who's into something different and you go, oh, I've never heard that before. Yeah. That's great, yeah. He said, like, oh, I haven't, like, cancelled folk music. I don't hate it now.

I just, you know. It's just not my whole vibe. Spotify's, you know, they find them what I like and they're spitting it back at me and I'm not hating it. So she got really petty and then said, well, if you don't really like folk music anymore, then I'm going to pack up all your folk music and I'm going to get rid of it.

Seems you hate it now. I mean, if there weren't any red flags already. Yeah, I mean, that's not great, is it? No. Because I hated folk. So she got rid of it. She goes onto Facebook Marketplace and goes, I've got a box of CDs and some old records for folk music. Fifty bucks, you can have the lot.

We'll use the money on something else since you hate it now. Oh, get folked. Couldn't have said it better. Yeah. So he's starting to think. What's going on here? Fuck this bitch. He's just like.

Fuck this bitch. Fuck this bitch. I can't believe what I'm about to say. Yeah. The girl ends up cheating on him with the guy who bought the box of music. He comes around and goes, G'day, I'm here to collect the folk music. And she goes, Oh, you're into folk music, are you? And he's like, Yeah, 50 bucks.

I'm going to take the whole box. I'm going to listen to this stuff. I'm going to enjoy that. And she goes, Oh, you like that? Folk music and folk me as well. And he folked the absolute shit out of her. And now they're together. Fuck off.

Folk off. Thank you. Yeah, that's a hard one because I'm like, oh, you know what? She knows what she wants. She wants someone that she can really fucking nerd out over folk music with. I don't know. And it brings me back to the original point.

Yeah. Did she like him or did she just? Like that he liked folk music. Folk music. I mean, fucking flip the coin and hope it explodes and kills me. I didn't know folk music had such a pull. Maybe we should try that. Have we got some folk music here?

No, I'm saying should we join Tinder? And that's not folk music. Is it? It just occurred to me that I don't know what folk music is. No, it's like Angus and Julia Stone is folk music. Is it? It just occurred to me that I don't know what folk music is. No, it's like Angus and Julia Stone is folk music. Bob Dylan, folk music. Not this? No, that's more country.

That song's called Kinfolks. Oh, close. But, yeah, like Bob Dylan, he's folk. It's like basically folk music is where they play four different chords on the guitar and that's all. And it's not great. Will there be a banjo involved? Could be.

Yeah. In a country folk kind of thing. But folk music like mainstream, I'd probably say like, yeah, Angus and Julia Stone kind of vibe. Or would you just never say folk music in mainstream, I'd probably say like, yeah, Angus and Julia Stone kind of vibe. Or would you just never say folk music and mainstream in the same sentence ever? Well, yeah, it's a tight competition. Well, all those three blokes are now single and I feel

like we can agree. Wow. Bullet dodged. Unflapp yourselves. Have you ever had a really bad dumping or, like, been like, well, that's a red flag? Like, what's the worst, like, red flag you've had? I can't say it.

It's so embarrassing. Oh. Can I say it to you? Oh, it makes me cringe. No, please share it. It wasn't even, like, I hadn't got to, like, dumping stage, which is, like, someone I just recently met. That's fine, yeah.

And she's, oh, no, I can't. No, you have to. It's so embarrassing. You have to. It's so embarrassing. Everybody is here. Everyone's supporting you. This is a safe space. What if I wrote it down and you read it?

Okay, yep, yep, yep. Okay, oh, my God, I'm so excited. I haven't dated enough people to have a red flag. And it's so embarrassing for me. And more her, but definitely still me. Oh, my God. Okay. So Ryan is currently writing down his red.

Is this the red flag that she had for you or you had for her? This is just a sentence she said. And then that's when I knew. Oh, she said. Okay. And I was like, absolutely not. Get out of the house. Okay.

So you guys met very briefly? As in met or met? With inverted commas. Met, okay. So met for the night potentially. Yep. And then she said. This in the morning.

So imagine you've just woken up and you're like at my place. Yep. This is in Mildura, by the way, very small town. Regional Ryan. Regional Ryan. And I've written there, I hope you can read my handwriting. You've woken up the next morning after a night of vivacious lovemaking. Yep, and she rolls over and says this.

See, that's why I couldn't say it out loud. I can't. Do you want to say where you worked? I was doing the breakfast radio show at Star FM in Mildura. I can't believe I fucked the guy from Star FM. You were her bingo card. In Mildura, there's a bingo card. Fucked the guy from the hardware store, fucked the guy from the IGA,

and for a ding, ding, ding winner, you fucked the guy from Star FM. She probably won a meat tray. She did. Hello. Thanks for sticking around. It's producer Cam here taking you through a throwback episode of Tony and Ryan. I think I mentioned this a while ago.

About three months ago, Torbs and I, my boyfriend Torbs, we bought a new washer and dryer. Lush. Yeah, it was like we didn't actually have a dryer. We only had a washing machine. And we bought it when we, like, lived in Perth and it's come with us to every new city. It's seen some things. It's seen some things.

And when we bought it, I'm pretty sure we bought it like secondhand and it was like, you know when well-known brands have like ripoff versions? So like instead of a Samsung, it's like Samsung or something. It's an LD. Yeah, the LD special that you get from fucking the best buyers in the centre. It was like a secondhand. I meant like instead of LG.

Oh. But now that I realise I've said LD. That's a different brand? It sounds like LD. No, no, you go. Okay. All right. We'll just skip straight past that one.

So we had this like. Because it's like an L and then instead of the G it's like a D. Last dude. Yeah. Very funny. Anyway, and so it was just like this shitty brand that we bought on fucking Marketplace or something. Would you say it served you and other people well, but its time was?

It was fucked. It was like have you ever had a washing machine that like shreds up your clothes? Yeah. And like doesn't really wash stuff well? Yeah. So we'd put things in and like woolen stuff would just come out shredded and everything just still smelt Yeah. So we'd put things in and like woolen stuff would just come out shredded

and everything just still smelt like damp after we'd washed it. At my old place, we had a dishwasher and we put stuff in the dishwasher and it would come out and there's still like food on the plates. Yeah. Like it wouldn't wash the dishes. Well, as you know, I don't trust dishwashers, so I'm actually not surprised by that story. I hate that I've said that to you now because I don't want

to confirm your conspiracy theory. But anyway, I get the concept of, hey, mate, you're supposed to do something here. Yeah. And you ain't doing it. Thank you. So, well, yeah, this washing machine had one job, but that's not where it ends. Okay. So Torbs and I were like, look, let's invest in something good.

We know that we'll have it for fucking 10 years or whatever. Torbs went online and bought these Samsung washer and dryer combo. They're black. It's like Schmick has. It's super cool. He orders it all and he goes to put in a delivery date. The delivery date for the washing machine, there wasn't a date for like a month.

So I was like maybe they're just really busy. It was like the supply chain issues and all that kind of shit. Yeah. So it ended up being that the washing machine was actually just not available yet. Yep. And then with the dryer, we ordered it three months ago. We got it this week.

Woo! Three months though. Should I be clapping? That feels like a long time for a dryer. It was such a long time. It's like obviously the most popular fucking washer and dryer in the southern fucking hemisphere. We're halfway through winter here in Australia, yeah.

I know. I've wanted to be drying this whole time. What have you been doing? So, well, we had the washing machine and we were just putting it up on like a clothes horse and that doesn't dry your fucking clothes. Not in winter. And I know that definitely we've got like mould on the lung, fucking legionnaires or something.

Like it's so fucked and it makes your house like damp when you're washing clothes. Yep. Anyway, it's so fucked and it makes your house, like, damp. Yeah. When you're washing clothes. Yep. Anyway, so they ended up, they dropped off the washing machine and we're fucking pumped because this dryer's coming. You've been talking that for a while. You were excited. The day before my boss on tomorrow, you're like,

ooh, fucking dryer day. Yeah. Look out. So exciting. Anyway. Can I come round today? No, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no, no.

Dryer's coming. The day is scrubbed. Yep. We need to make sure that when they ring, we're fucking ready. And obviously, because I've got a Toyota Yaris, I've got like a tiny car, so we obviously paid for delivery. You ain't picking up a dryer in the Yaris. Absolutely fucking not.

Anyway, and so they had one option where it was like they basically like tip it off the truck and it's just at your front door and you have to go out and grab it and stuff. Then they had this like nice delivery. Yeah. Yeah. For $50 or something. They'll come up and they'll plug it all in.

Yeah. And like they take away the old one. Yeah. So I was like fucking hell. It's real worth it. So when the washing machine came, they came up, they like took all the plastic off, took the old washing machine because we couldn't sell it.

It was like fucked. Yeah. They took it away and plugged it in. It was ready to go and it was fucking, it was done. Like, we could put washing straight in. Yeah, so they left and you loaded her up, pressed play. Good to fucking go. Yeah, sick.

We got the dryer delivered. We've paid for this, like, premium delivery because we're like, fuck, yeah, we'll get them to put it in, all good. They, like, fuck around in the, oh, it's probably a good time to explain, the footprint of my bathroom. You've been in there. It's quite pokey and there's two like cupboard doors and that's where the washing machine and the dryer sit.

So if you open up the doors, there's like no room to move in the bathroom. You literally open them to put the washing in, close them so that you can move around again. A European laundry, if you will. Is that what they're called? I think so, but not in the kitchen. It's like in the bathroom. You literally open them to put the washing in, close them so that you can move around again. A European laundry, if you will. Is that what they're called? I think so, but not in the kitchen. It's like in the bathroom.

And anyway, so they kind of drag the dryer in and stuff. They take it into the thing. We've paid for this premium delivery, so we're like, holy fuck, we've already had a load in the washing machine. So as soon as the dryer was good to go, we could fucking bang it straight in. Good to go. Here we go. Here we go. They fuck around for a while. straight in, good to go. Here we go. Here we go.

They fuck around for a while. We're like, oh, fucking here we go. Like, I'm so excited. I can't believe how. I know, how boring has been going up. Tony and Torbs were genuinely so pumped about this. If you think this sounds boring, welcome to the real world of Tony Lodge. I never grew up with a dryer,

so I didn't know how life-changing it would be. And let me tell you, after the last couple of days, we've washed everything in our house three times. Just an excuse to use the dryer. Just for the fucking sake of it. Washed our sheets and they were, like, warm and crisp and delicious when normally they're outside on the balcony for fucking three weeks trying to, yeah.

It rains again. Oh, fuck, we've got to start again. Yep, start again, put them back in the fucking washing machine. Anyway, so they're fucking around in there for a while. We're like, fucking here we go. They come out. They go, yep, all good. And we go, oh, bro, thank you so much.

The guys leave. We walk into the bathroom. It's still got all the plastic on it. What? They haven't moved it back into the spot that it's supposed to go. So just sitting in the middle of the bathroom? Literally, it was just sitting in the middle of the bathroom. Are the doors open?

Of the laundry? Yeah, because you couldn't close them because it was, like, in the way. Well, that's what I mean. The doors were closed and they just dumped it there. No, no, no. We were like, yeah, just pop it in there. And all they had done was plug it in. No, mate, that's not what this is.

But it was so far out of where it was supposed to go. Did you go call them back? Oh, you're bad. No. Could you just chuck it in there for us? No. Did you like when they said we're leaving, did you have a quick look and make sure they'd done what they're paid to do?

Well, no, because I was like I'm not a teacher. I'm not checking your work. Like obviously you've done it because you were paid to come in and do one thing. But don't when they're installing it you kind of just wander in and go, how's it going? There's no room in there. Oh, of course.

So there was these two guys that were delivering the thing and Torbs and I are just kind of standing outside the door. They didn't introduce themselves. That's rude. And also smart because I was about to slander them. Yeah, no. So I don't know. But anyway, so literally the power cord is plugged in, but it's so far away that it was, like, taut.

So not only have they realised that, like, that's obviously probably not where it's supposed to end up, they've plugged it, like, they've, like, reached in, plugged it in at the thing and it's fucking, yeah, like. All right, you know what? You could have done fucking limbo under there. You know. Like, it was fucking.

You know what's fucked me off about this story? What? The fact they've plugged it in, if they didn't plug it in right, I would have gone, oh, maybe. They just didn't know. They misread and thought it was just a regular delivery and wasn't a Tony's gone all out for the premium delivery. But the fact they've plugged it in means that they knew what they had taken

your money for and they have not delivered. Have you called Samsung back? What's their number? No. 1-800-SAMSUNG. So anyway. Sam! Sam?

Hello? Sam! Mr. Sung? So anyway, we were just like, what the fuck? So then what did you do? Well, I was a bit head up about it and I was like, well, they've gone. Like, there's nothing we can do. I'm not going to call them back.

Like, that's so dickhead. Is it? That's like a real dick thing to do. Not if you paid for something. Anyway, so we tried to. It's not a Tony thing to do because you wouldn't like to cause a fuss. No. And anyway, so we tried to shimmy it back into the spot

that it's supposed to go. Yeah. And it didn't fit. What? It didn't fit? Yeah. Like it was too thick? So.

Like the width of it? Yeah, the width of the dryer. So we're like, obviously they've gone. They've tried it. They've realised it doesn't fit. Let's get the fuck out of here before they realise. Instead of being like, yo, it doesn't fit, and us being like, well, can you take it back or can you help us out or whatever.

So what are you doing now? They fucking gapped and fucking they fucked off. So is it still just sitting in the middle? Okay, so then Torbs and I, we had to take all the hinges off the door. If I find out it's in the fucking lounge room. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. We had to take the hinges off the cupboard doors. Torbs like shimmied it into the back of the thing

and then put the door back on. It's like now when we move out we're going to have to fucking take all, yeah, the whole thing. But they realised it didn't fit. What a shitty fucking thing to do. You paid the $75 for this fucking. $75? Whatever it fucking is.

Oh. Which one of your team members approved that? Bro, you just said before it was $50. For them to not even do the job. And then, but they realised it didn't fucking fit and went, cool, all done. What would they have done if we walked in there and went, oh, bro, could you like shift it back? They would have been like, oh, it doesn't fit.

Like how fucking awkward. I don't work here. I can't help you. I don't work here. I'm the cleaner. Yeah, I'm sorry. That was someone else that put that in, not us. When I got a washer at my apartment in Bunbury, I snuck it into the slot

and then when I moved, I couldn't get it out. Yeah. I snuck it into the slot and then when I moved, I couldn't get it out. Yeah. So you're like, comes with what goods? I don't. Added bonus. Thank you so much for sticking around on the Monday episode of the Tony and Ryan Throwback episode.

My name is Producer Cam. As always, we love to do what you love to see at the end just to wrap it up and keep our spirits high. Now, the guys there, just see really between you and me, the guys are kind of dog people. I'm a cat person, so now that they're not here and I get some time to throw my own, you'll love to see it, I'm going to do a tweet about a cat because I'm allowed to.

This is from E underscore Davishow on Twitter. She says, cat ownership is hearing a single soft clink from across the house and yelling, get away from the butter. We've all been there. If you're a cat person like me, that had me howling. So thank you so much for sticking around. I'm going to see you tomorrow for a Tuesday throwback episode of the Tony and Ryan podcast.

I've been Producer Cam. You've been beautiful. I love you. See you soon.