Toni and Ryan - Toni is a Cereal Killer

Episode Date: September 22, 2024

Emphasis on CERIAL and not SERIAL PS hehehe love u! xoxoxCheck out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toniandryanpodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast. My name is Ryan. This is Dr. Arthur, best-selling Dr. Arthur Tony Lodge. And we are calling one of my favorite places, Virginia Beach. Oh God. I didn't think you were going to say Virginia.

This is Kayleigh. One of my favorite places, a vagina. Tony Lodge cannot be trusted. Sorry. Hello? Kayleigh! Hi! It's Tony and Ryan. Hi! How are you Kayleigh? What are you up to?

Oh, I'm so good. I am studying for a nursing exam tomorrow and I'm about to just stop because it's pretty much in God's hands at this point. Yeah. I know that. In fact, Tony's probably heard me explain that feeling to her very recently. Yeah. Yeah.

I've done all I can and we'll just have to cross our fingers. It's up to the stars now. I know you're studying to be a nurse at the moment, but where did you used to work, Kayleigh? I used to work in Disney World. Oh, cool. Oh my God. What did you do there? So I worked in one of the resorts.

So I wasn't in the parks or anything, but I did get to work in one of the really nice resorts. So I got to meet some pretty famous people, which was really cool. But I was in college the first time I went to college when I did it. So I was really young and I was just working during the day and going to get drunk and I've caught at night.

It's pretty much is that not living? That's not real. Literally the dream. Kelly, that sounds actually awesome, but will you approve it? This isn't as fun as that, but will you approve this podcast? This is so much as fun as that. I absolutely approve. Hi, this is Kaylee from Virginia beach and I approve this podcast? Yeah. It's a brand new week and we're excited and we're pumped, but we do have to start with

a disclaimer because we have a wounded soldier. A wounded soldier? Tony was in a fist fight at the supermarket yesterday. Yeah. I believe, was it in the cereal aisle? Yeah, it was. Yeah. One box.

Cereal killer. That's funny. That is funny. There was one last box of crunchy nut. Tony grabbed it, someone else grabbed it. They got into blows. Yeah. So I clothes lined her. Yeah. And so how have you ended up, mate?

Oh, I just, I've woken up with a real crook neck. And I woke up maybe two days ago and I was like, oh, that's a bit sore. You know what I should do? Pilates. You know what I should do? Like go and like do some strange stuff to my body. But sometimes Pilates would, the theory of like loosening up. Yeah. Very considered, like very intentional. But no. Nah, it's, it's not good.

So. I've got like, I look a bit like Hontbacker, much Notre Dame because I've got like a big heat bag, like under my denim. It's like, I'm wearing like a cool outfit, but it's like. It is a great outfit, but it's really not doing it justice. I know. Although to be fair, the heat pack, the color of the heat pack doesn't-

Cause it's part of the blues a little bit. It kind of looks like, well, if I have to have a heat pack that matches this outfit. Well, I've actually got 12 heat packs at home and I picked these ones specifically. Different colors, yeah. Yeah. Uh, what hex code color heat packs should I wear today?

Is anyone else in the heat pack fashion game? I'd like to know that. There's got to be like a Chanel fucking heat pack or something. So Tony gets in and we're like, oh, poor sweetheart, how can we help you out? Let's find a last minute physio or osteo. Yeah. And Sophie goes, oh, there's this great one in Collingwood. And you went, oh, the parking.

Well, do I need another burden on my mind today? Yeah. If I'm already sore, do I really need to be going in there thinking, oh, oh God. Imagine doing a reverse parallel park with a crook. I was going to say you try to do it behind. You'd never be able to. Yeah. Yeah.

That's tough. Maybe I'll Uber there. Yeah. And you just have a little cat nap in the back. Yeah. Have a little cat nap. Stay warm. I said to Tony, because Northland, the, you know, big, big shopping center. Supermarket, our shopping center.

Yeah. I predict there are seven massage places in there and you went, you wouldn't get a massage in the supermarket, would you? Well, I've actually never done one in a shopping center. What's the concern there? I think it's just that they're so like really normal life happening mere meters away. Yeah. I feel really strange about being naked next to a Coles.

And I've actually always said that. I just think that there's something off put it. I just don't think I could relax in a supermarket. Do you remember the time when the lady was, she was getting a massage and she was at the front of the massage in the shopping center and she was looking out through the glass of the store. Yes, making eye contact with you. She was staring at me and I just stood there and stared back and she was like pulling those

faces and stuff. Runs like I can't look away. Yeah. Yeah. My, so I, if there's like a spare 10 or 15 minutes, I don't think I'd go in for like an hour, but it's sort of like, I actually do have a spare 20 minutes, just little neck and shoulders, like number or whatever.

I don't mind, but what fucks me right up is when you've got your face down in the chair or the... Yeah. Tony. Yeah, but it's those angled chairs, it's kind of like half. Yeah, but if you've got your face down, or if you're getting your back, or you're like face down.

Yeah. And then you walk back out into the bright lights of the shopping center and you can't see. Yeah. You're like blinded by the light. 100%. And like you said, there's so much normal shit going on around you. Yeah, it's too normal.

Who's that fucking zombie guy cruising around? It's like I've come out of a cave that I've been in for 400 years. 100%. You're like half comatose. And sometimes I could be oily. And it just feels like you're a public nuisance to be walking around in a shopping center that oily. Like you've got no business being that oily in a shopping center.

Where does one have business being oily? I think you can be oily at your home. I think you can be oily at the beach. Like you've been oiled up. Oh yeah. And you can be oily at like a strip of shops where one of them is a massage place or an osteo or whatever. But I just don't think anyone has any business

being that oily in a supermarket. And I've always said that. That's just the way I choose to live my life. So with all things considered, what is the plan remedy for today? Well, so I've got, yeah, osteo appointment this afternoon. We're locked in. We're locked in. And then, you know, maybe there's a pain threshold afternoon. We're locked in. We're locked in. Yeah.

And then, you know, maybe there's a pain threshold of like, this is how much pain I'm in. I can be more oily in public now. Yeah. You know? Yeah, yeah. The oil's pain. It's a self-curve.

Yeah. My, okay, we've talked about the cons of the massage in the shopping center. The pros are, is that when you're at a, like a strip of shops on the street, often in Melbourne, at least it's upstairs. Oh no, that's near. And it's like a really narrow staircase and you're like trying to like tip top the thing. And they're like, hi, like you're here for the thing. I'm like, I really hope it's not another level up. And then you've got an oily walk down, back down the stairs.

My thing is often they go, oh, it seems like your hips are a bit crooked. And I said, yeah, because I had to side step up a stairwell to get here. But you actually did. It's really narrow. Like it's not built for me. Also the parking. On a stupid shops one, often parking is an issue. So on a shopping center? Yeah. No, parking's never an issue. And it's always on the same level.

Unless it's at Doncaster. Of course I wouldn't be able to get a parking spot. They have a lot of massage places there. Wouldn't know. I wouldn't know. Wouldn't know. Wouldn't even know. How long is this massage?

Longer than four minutes. Got to get my car parked. Yeah. I call the bus here because I couldn't get. I wouldn't know. Wouldn't even know. How long is this massage? Longer than four minutes. Got to get my car parked back. Yeah. I caught the bus here because I couldn't get a fucking car park. However, yeah, we pulled our resources. I couldn't get into my guy. Ryan's guy was busy.

Sophie had three on the go actually. Yeah, Sophie's. She's fucking cracking and clacking and rubbing all over town. She's got three phones She's got a business phone a private phone I'm gonna rock out there and I'm not gonna know what what I'm in for and the third phone is an oil phone. Oh I need to get oil She's ready to go

Hi, this is Kaylee from Virginia Beach and you're listening to Tony and Ryan. A massive shout out to a few of our champion tapas over at our Patreon. Cat Sprat, good on you, cat. Cat Sprat, sat on my shat. Jasmine Rose, good on you Jasmine. Hang on, hang on. Yep. What was that? That was a good whistle.

Thank you. What did you say? Cat Sprat. And I just, a little bit of rhyming from me. Okay. Not that you'd be familiar with that because your grandma doesn't know how to rhyme. Cat Sprat, sat on my shat. She does, but poems don't have to rhyme. So some do. Did she tell you that? No, that's just how it is. She tell you that though. Gaslighting you about poetry.

Jasmine Rose, good on you, Jazz. Katie Laycock. Don't have any plans for anyone else. Jasmine Rose. That's actually very funny. So funny that you missed Katie Laycock. Oh, where do we start today? Yeah, we're on a real roll here. Jasmine's cousin. No, I don't think I have. It's called Jackaranda.

What's a Jackaranda? What's a Carl? Isn't the joke that Jasmine and a Rose are both plants? Jackaranda is her name. No, but wouldn't it be like Frangipani grass or something? Because it's like two plants. Not Carl. Carl's just another guy. Have you had Jasmine Rose as cousin?

Yes Steve. One name like Prince. Just the one. What's a Jack and Randa? The purple flowers. Okay so the name is Jack, first name, second name, Aranda. And Carl is his friend. But isn't the joke that it's like two plants?

No, but Carl is just there. No, no, no, but isn't the joke that it's like two plans? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, No, but still, I don't think that this is real Sally Stadium energy. The tree is a different tree to the Jacaranda. So what? Jacaranda gum. Do ya? I fucking hate working here. This is the worst day of my life.

I feel worse than Tony's neck. I would have liked to have today off to be honest. And maybe we should have. Maybe we fucking should have. Jackaranta Cubs! So anyway, Sally Laycock. Katie Laycock. You're thinking of Sally Stadium.

Katie Laycock, Grony Katie. Mel Sally Stadium. Katie Laycock, Goody Katie. Mel, Mary Dull. After all, is it just Mel? And Maryam. No, for Mel. Oh. For Mel. Fuck off.

You called her Dull. Fuck. That's brutal, Doug. I didn't call Mel Dull. That's brutal, Doug. I didn't call Mel Dull. That's what it sounded like. We did the Dull cast last week. It looks like it's back again. Okay, Mel, I don't call Mel dull. That's brutal. I didn't call Mel dull. That's what it sounded like. We did the dull cast last week. It looks like it's back again.

Okay. Mel, I don't think you're dull. And Miriam. Thank you very much. What's a plant that has Mel in it? Mel... Oh, that plant Mel's very nice. Plant Mel?

Mel-burn-grass. Melanoma. Soaking? Plant mill, mill, burn grass. Mel Melanoma. So no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, That's not a plan. Oh, root. Oh, actually, no, it might be. Fake eyes, right? What new lines? I've sent you one to crack out. Melaleuca iniferolia. Do ya? Melaleuca iniferolia?

I hardly know her. Are you going or am I going? I'd like to know, and I'd like for you, Ryan, to think about this and for everybody, all of our tables listening, when is a gift not a gift? When does a gift become so much of a responsibility that you're actually just now doing someone else a favor? Right. Uh, fairly Christmas, Tony, I will let you mow my lawn. Yeah, I guess I kind of that, but like, when have you had to put in so much effort to like make a gift work?

So I think, um, I think in London, did we, uh, at one stage come to an understanding that we would no longer buy each other tickets? Yeah, we're not going to buy each other tickets. Because we would buy each other tickets and stuff and then we go, fuck, now I have to go to that thing. Or like, it would just kind of be a bit of a bad omen, like something would always go wrong or whatever. So yeah, we have decided that as a group, we aren't, but it's just such a nice gift,

isn't it? It is nice. And you feel, but I think like when you give someone a really lovely gift, though, you're thinking about how nice the gift is and not what it puts the pressure on the person. Not the logistics. So one of my beautiful friends, Rachel, Sarah, as you know, a few weeks ago, she actually, she sent me this stunning orchid and for anybody that knows me and I'm like very vocal about this, I absolutely, I love flowers. Like it is on the record.

I've said this many times that if I ever won lotto, like the first thing that I would do is set up like a bunch of flowers to come to my house every single week. Like a big, beautiful bunch of fresh, like that is my thing. I fucking love them. I think there's one thing that everyone's thinking. Yeah. Is the awkward related to Daisy Rose, Jasmine, or is the, is that where we got?

I think this is a distant cousin. Yeah. They, they've met at a, they've met at a thing. That's why we're all, we're all thinking that. Yeah. That is what we're all thinking. this is a distant cousin. Yeah. They've met at a thing. That's what we're all thinking about. Yeah, that is what we're all thinking, you're right. Yeah. Okay. Sorry, sorry. No, no, no. Thank you for bringing that up

because it was a real rose bush in the room. Oh, they might have to do an Ancest tree test. Trey and I. I didn't realize I was going into player chat. I totally forgot. You fucked me right up. Yeah. So are we, do you want me to stop and do this tomorrow?

Nah. I don't know. I actually, I feel funny. Which is, no, that's okay. Yeah, I feel silly. You're wearing a silly t-shirt. I am wearing a silly t-shirt. Do you want to say what the t-shirt is?

It says, it's a... Sorry. If this is your first episode, we're usually better than this. Oh, shut up. It's got a huge close-up picture of a duck and it says duck around and find out. I fucking love it. And it's got this huge picture of a rabbit on it.

This is only a recent foray for Ryan into printed t-shirts. It's quite fresh. I was always a plain guy. Like a fresh trend for me or it's like, it's fresh? Fresh trend for you. Okay. Is it like also like fresh? So anyway, Jacaranda came over from Rachel Sarah.

No. She sent me a beautiful orchid. Orchid beautiful orchid. And I do, I really love flowers. However, this wasn't a bunch of flowers. It was an orchid in a pot. Now I'm going to show you a picture of it. This is the day it came like stunning.

That is stunning. And like really just like really beautiful, like a very generous gift had a lovely note with it and it was just gorgeous. And so it's a single kind of stem and then the orchid flowers flower on their beautiful like flowers. They are beautiful, bright. Yeah. And there's a couple of like buds at the top that you're like, Oh my God, they're going to open up soon. Um, but for anyone that might not know, and Ryan, I'm guessing that you might not know, is that an orchid is like famously very hard to care for.

Were you originally in charge of the plants in the office? Yeah. How'd that go for you? Sophie has now taken that job on. Didn't the people at Melbourne Indoor Plants say you'd have to be a fuckhead to fuck these up? Yeah, she did. Yeah. And then what did you do? Just was myself fucked it up. Yeah. So what I just thought what I'm getting at is for and I'm not really a plant guy And I just I'm no better to be you to be fair

Yeah, but what I'm saying is if a regular plant was tough a tough plant plan is What I'm saying is if a regular plant was tough, a tough plant is extra tough. Oh, so thanks for the gift, Rachel Sarah. Yeah. And so it's like this all getting apart and I'm like, fuck that. Like as soon as I get, I sent my sister a photo and she's like, oh, orchids are tricky. Like, and they're all so expensive. Like you feel like there's so much pressure. And she's kind of like written this beautiful note about like, thank you so much for being such a great friend.

Blah, blah. And I'm like, this is a symbol of our love. And I'm going to piss on her. I'm going to kill it. Definitely. If you kill that, that's probably the end of your friendship with her. I would have thought. So I did a bit of Googling.

How's that awkward going? And you go, and I go, oh, this is awkward. But anyway, so I do a bit of Googling. I'm like, all right, I'm going to give this the best chance for survival. And I Googled it. And basically it's fuck it. It's sensitive to heat, cold, humid, dry, wet, hot, cold, dry, wet. Like it can't be any of those things.

It's basically me. She's gifted me me very sensitive, not very good at surviving. Tony just said survive. I guess you ducked around and found out. It was the surviving surviving. And I survived. Oh, spat everywhere. But I can tell how stressed you are by the amount of saliva leaving your face.

It's too much, isn't it? Um, yeah, fuck it. And where does it go? Um, well, this is the thing. Is it indoor or outdoor? Are you supposed to like move it around the house, like follow the sun, but it can't have too much sun because then it will dry out. Can you pop it on top of Janine and tell Janine, yeah, she needs this many hours of sunlight, this much time in a cool room.

You do what you gotta do. So Janine, my robo vac is looking after the orchid. Yeah. And Rachel's like, God, I'm such good friends with your robo vac, Janine. And then, so a few weeks after I got the orchid, it's not looking good. And so this was a few weeks ago and this is where kind of it was at. Oh, wow. That is.

Yeah. So I'd had the orchid for a little while and it was, I just like could not. And I was like, maybe I'll be able to bring it back. The orchid looks like it's just seen Les Mis. It is. That's really funny. It is sad. It's Les Mis a shrub.

Yeah. It's Mayris a shrub. And. Yeah. A is sad. It's like, yeah, it's maybe is a shrub. And I interested like, again, I don't know the dynamics of the tree, but you do. You do. The picture is in what I would say the darkest room of your house. Well, so with the curtain down, it was and you can tell by her mood. It was because it was drying out.

Yeah. In the hot, like because we have the fire on the other end. So I was like, maybe it needs a little bit of like, aren't I? You know, like it's a little bit off to be in. It's it's in its little thing. That was a few weeks ago. OK. Here is a photo. From today, I hope I'm pleasantly surprised. In the bin next to the door. I'm not, it is in a bin. It is in a bin. Next to the front door, ready to go out for bin day this week. I can't quite tell by looking at it. I don't know if it's my eyesight

or whatever. Is that the plant in the bin or is that your friendship with Rachel? It's both. whatever. Is that the plant in the bin or is that your friendship with Rachel? It's both. Sorry. Fucking tough way to find out as well, Rach. It really fucking hates you. It really is. And I feel so bad. But like. Did you also feel bad that you left Tobbs Moccasins in the back of the shot? No, they're cool.

I could. What are you talking about? Okay. What are you talking about? Before I was doing a photo shoot, I would just get the set right. Well, it's not a photo shoot. It's a horrible dark day. Sorry that you're not happy on my day of fucking morning. No wonder she's legged it with that attitude.

It's sad, isn't it? It is sad. So have you told Rachel? I did tell her and I said, I'm so sorry to like, she listens to the pod as well. Yeah. So I didn't, I didn't want her to hear the news on the podcast. Do you know what I mean? So I gave her a quick text.

I went, Hey mate, just letting you know that tomorrow. Um, but I would once again, like to ask the question, when is a gift, not a gift, because this feels like quite selfish. She's given me this beautiful, expensive plant and now I feel like an asshole, but she's like, gets to then be like, it's okay. No, she doesn't get to sympathize. She created this fucking mess. She made the problem. Who is your number one fan and supporter?

You. That's on fucking Rachel. That's not on Tony. Thank you. That's on Rachel. If you want a friendship and a flowership to flourish, don't send whatever the fuck that plant was. And do you know what I would send you?

Orchids. Fuck you. What I would send you? Nothing you had to fucking keep alive. Thank you. You know? I've got a baby for that. Yeah, you're already busy. I'm keeping shit alive as it is. There's enough happening. Do you know, Sophie told me right about a girlfriend of hers

who had a baby and someone gifted them a fucking swing set for their backyard. For a baby. But it's like, Oh, like, no, but it's more like, so we've got to put this whole thing together and air tasker to put the fucking swing set up. Or is that on me now? So the friends had to put the whole thing together and they're like, Oh my God. Right.

And don't you just open that, like, unwrap that gift and go, oh, oh. Is there a guy in here to assemble it? Who's doing it? Sophie, tell us the end of that story. They asked them to take it back. Wow. You don't get to decide the aesthetic of my backyard either. Like that's a huge, that's like buying someone a fucking couch.

Right? Where's the swing set now? The back at bloody the shop, the swing set shop. I'll take it. I won't put it up, but I'll take it. As for the principle. Yeah. But like, isn't that so brave being like, no, actually I'm not taking this on.

Imagine if I bought you a pool table. But that is actually the same amount of gaudy shit that you're like, Oh, but where do I put this? I don't have a billiard room. Yeah. Well, who are you to decide? And also are you then buying me a pool table so that you can come over and play pool? Yes.

But like that's the other thing, isn't it? That you're like, Oh, so you just wanted to come and do that. Yeah. I don't have room for a pool table at mine. So I'd love to bring it to you. Yeah. That's fucking, that is. Yeah.

Fucked up. So in today's episode thread, I'd love to know if anybody's is related to a plan. That too. Yeah. Either question is fine. Um, but if you have either received a gift that you went, this is, there's too much, uh, like being asked of me.

Yeah. Or whether you did what, like some people have done and gone, I actually can't take that on, like you'll have to take this back. I would've sold it. Facebook marketplace. Can't pick it up. And then take the 50 bucks. Yeah.

Okay. But also then it's like, you can pick it up. 50 bucks. Yeah. Okay. But also then it's like, you can hide that it's not there. Then those friends come over. And then you never invite them back. But those friends come over though. Then you introduce them to your friend, Rachel, and hope they make friends and start their own new life together.

Give each other orchids and swing sets and stuff. Yeah, do whatever the fuck they want. But like, then the people come over and they go, where's the swing set? And you go, oh. Oh yeah, I saw that. That terrible wind we had the other day. Yeah, oh, oh yeah. I saw that terrible wind. We had the other day.

Yeah. The blue down the street. Blue on down. Yeah. Shit. That is fucking bold. Isn't that crazy? I don't like that.

But I reckon we'll get some cracking stories about that. I've got a, my love to see it is a two-parter. If it's Jack Aranda, I will leave. OK. It's from Bobby Boone, who's a tarpa. Hi Bobby Boone. I've decided to follow Tony's lead and if I want to learn something, I just do it no matter what. It doesn't matter if I stop, doesn't matter if I'm great at it, at least I had a go.

This year I've learned to knit and skate. That actually sounds really fun and Bobby Boone, could I come and hang out and knit and skate with you? That sounds like a good time. I can't obviously do either right now. I'm immobilized. Oh, is that your knitting shoulder? Well, I don't think I could sit and hunch over something. Work the pins. Yeah.

I'll find a way. That's the first you'll have to see it. My second love to see it. It's a bit meta, but in my mind, I imagined him knitting while skating. Oh, absolutely. Me too. And I just, it just, but it, it took me a bit to go, oh, like two hobbies. Not like- Oh, two hobbies for Bobbies. No, but I was like, this year I learned to like, like knit skate. Like it was like,

yeah, there's a group of guys that like get together and skate and knit at the same time. And I was like, oh, that's a fucking pretty random combination. But if you had a group of friends that wanted to do that, that'd be pretty fun. Yeah, opposite the skill. Or maybe you knit yourself like, oh, that's a fucking pretty random combination. But if you had a group of friends that wanted to do that, that'd be pretty fun. Yeah, but I did the skill. Or maybe you knit yourself like some knee pads, like a helmet cover. Like, so you got your helmet on and then on the top, you got your- You get arrested for it.

The police officer's like, do you have a helmet? And he's like, not yet. Yeah, it's actually, it's on its way. It's on its way. I'll do it right now. Bobby Boone, love that. Love that you're getting amongst it and you'll have to fucking see it.

Also just love that you're starting the fucking blog. Yeah, get around it. The Tony Lodge way, just do it. Nitskate.com. Absolutely. I feel a bit bad now because my love to see it is actually quite good for me. Makes me sound pretty good.

Oh, you feel really bad. So I'm really actually getting gassed up that like both you love to see it's quite Tony based. However- So just this episode, feeling bad about that. Fuck you. What about the other 700 we've done in the last three years? Oh, well, if you wanted to

bring some life, no, that's all good. I'm happy being your sidekick. Like if you wanted people to say good shit about you, you just do good shit, all right? That's my advice. And yeah, that's fair. Yeah, duck around and find out. This is from Jess.

Duck around and find out, mate. I'll get me rabbit onto you. Like in the sex toy way? No, in the like, that's the picture of this, this rabbit. Oh yeah, good, yeah. It goes with my spoon. Jess says, just went to buy my fiance a present for our anniversary,

chuck some things in the basket and then remember Tony's hack of the potential discount. You know how I said like, whenever you're going through a website, you just try a couple of like, hello 10, welcome 20, couple of things like that. Yep. I tried it and she goes, I'm skeptical that it wasn't going to work.

You don't have to be skeptical because there's actually no losers, but there could be a winner. Yeah. And Jess is a winner. Holy shit, 10% off with the welcome 10. Don't you just love to see it? And then Jess says, I'll be taking the doctor's orders more seriously in future. Well, that's on her for questioning you in the first place.

Don't question my integrity. Thank you. However, she says, all good news. Literally can't move. Yeah, I'm moving like this. I'm a robot. Don't question the integrity of the robot. Tomorrow we are doing confessions.

Don't question the integrity of the robot. Don't question the integrity of the robot. Don't question the robot. Tomorrow on the show. I don't know if we can come back tomorrow. Do you wanna have a day off? Maybe tomorrow is the mental health day. Yeah, tomorrow is the day that we will go to the gynecologist and get our teeth done.

Sorry. Was that, yeah, that's. Let me read the first sentence of one of tomorrow's confessions. Yeah. There is a local park in my area that I go to to have anonymous sex with other men. And something's happened.

I was about to say something's gone down, but obviously. But not what you'd expect. Oh. Not what you'd expect. Okay. All right, we'll chat to you tomorrow maybe. Love you, bye. Bye.