Toni and Ryan - Vicious Rumour

Episode Date: April 2, 2023

Something that FUCKS YOU OFF that your partner does - but doesn't realllllllllllllly affect you! Plus an awful rumour about Ryan. Is it true? Love ya Check out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Plus you can find the links to order Toni's book here! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to the podcast. Hello, I'm Tony. This is Ryan. Together we're Tony and Ryan. We're calling, who are we calling? Amy in Hamilton, New Zealand. Kia ora. I wonder if this is the Amy I was supposed to drop a Frank Green water bottle off to. Get fucked. Get fucked. Amy, how you doing? Hi. Good. Good. Now, Amy, are you the Amy I was supposed to drop off Frank Green Water Bottle 2 in New Zealand? No, but I'll take it. No, no.

We don't have any to give you, but. I said I was going to go over there. May have got COVID and not done it, so that's all good. That doesn't sound like you. No, thanks for Tony. I've spent far too much on Frank Green Water Bottle. Oh, there you go. Not my fault.

Not your fault. Not your fault. Amy, will you approve the podcast? Of course I will. Yay. Not my fault. Not your fault, not your fault. Amy, will you approve the podcast? Of course I will. Yay! Woo! Hey, it's Amy from Hamilton, New Zealand, and you're listening to the Tony and Ryan podcast.

All right, coming up today. I am intrigued. I've been thinking about this all weekend. The vicious rumour? Yeah. Because... I've been accused of something that I don't reckon I did. What is it?

I've read about it online. I don't like it. I want to address it. It's embarrassing. I need to spend more time on the Daily Mail because I don't know what's going on. I know that Tony Lodge and Cameron Hutchings will back me because we're friends. Oh.

All right. Let's just wait and see. Let's not throw crazy things around. Okay. Okay. We know who your friends are. First, though, what's something that your partner does that impacts you in no way at all but really fucks you off?

Because my wife has accused me, and let me just read this, of being a terrorist who thrives on chaos. Oh, my God. Strong words. All right, so if you... Are you just putting your teeth in sorry i'm just putting my muslim back in oh no you go oh everyone heard that too i just finished a green juice and i didn't want to yeah drink it while i was yeah all right sorry everyone oh yeah i was doing it

silently you didn't have to stop the whole podcast um if you've got some medication or like pain-killing tablets or whatever. Like ibuprofen or something? Sure. Yeah. Which tablet do you take out first? Like do you like do it in order, like down the packet? Oh. Or do you just pop anything?

No, there's an order. Okay, my god what you're so wrong i didn't even know what you meant because there is just there's such an obvious like structure to how that operates it does really stress me out that the numbers are always odd. Like it's always three or five across. So you can't just go two, two, two, two, two. You've got to go like two, two, one, one, two, two, one, one. So I've got some, I wouldn't say medication, wouldn't say, yeah, sort of like helps me get to sleep, relax at night. Is that like melatonin or something? Yeah, it's got melatonin. Yeah. And so each night i've got like a there's a sheet

and i'll just pop one out and then how much do you think this affects bridget considering it's my medication that i take at night i feel affected by it and i've only just heard about it let me just i've got some audio because she was on a fucking bit of a roll so I just put the phone out. You've got to, like, get them all from, like, one line and then the next line. Like, you've got to do it systematically. No, who cares?

No, but then you're like, oh, I've got no tablets left. And I'm like, no wonder you don't know you have any tablets left. You're just coming from random places. And she was distressed. That's the thing. It's the order and being able to be like, oh, I'm at the bottom right corner. I know that I need to get more or whatever.

Because if you go from left to right, like the same way as if you're reading a book, and then right at the end you go, I've got two left, I'm in the bottom right corner, that triggers something. Otherwise, if you're going random, like an advent calendar, you know how they're in random orders and you don't know what's happening. You can't really see all the windows. You don't, you know.

What day is it today? That's crazy. So I will. On an advent calendar, right, this is contentious. Do you go from 1 to 24 or do you go from 24 to 1? Do you go like the date or do you go from 24 to 1? Do you go, like, the date or do you go, like, 24 sleeps till Christmas? First of all, you would definitely go the date.

Second of all, I wouldn't really know because I'm an adult and it doesn't matter. Okay, cool. This coming from the hater of fun. And destroyer of joy. When was the last time you had an advent calendar? Last year. Can confidently say last year, Cadbury. I buy the nice ones now.

I was going to say, you're doing all right. Yeah, yeah. Not the... They do like fucking lint ones and stuff now. There's like beer ones. Oh, I have... Yeah, that's not my thing. No, no, no, no, no.

Well, I don't really drink. Like, I wouldn't have a beer every night. You'd be blind for the whole month. Oh, my God. If I had, no, no, no. Well, I don't really drink. Like, I wouldn't have a beer every night. Yeah, you'd be blind for the whole month if you had a beer a day. Oh, my God. If I had a beer a day, I would die. I wouldn't get anything done. I repeat. Yeah, actually.

Anyway, sorry, back to your tablets. So I'll, like, get the sheet of tablets and then, like, look around and go, oh, I'm all out. And I'll be like, fuck, I better go to the doctor this afternoon because I won't have any for tonight. And I'll be like, fuck, I better go to the doctor this afternoon because I won't have any for tonight. The thing that really annoys me about things that you do, right, like this, for example, is that you know it's a problem

but you don't change it. Well, I don't know. You've got to go to the doctor anyway. But, like, so then you go, oh, I've got to go this afternoon. What if you can't get an appointment or whatever, which I'm sure has happened at some point. You just go to another doctor. But, like, you can't just go to a random GP.

I did that on Friday. What? Yeah. I was out of tablets and this is what started this whole brouhaha. And so I just went. Can you go to a random GP? Yeah, I called them and said, does any of the doctors have any availability this other? And they went, oh, yeah, this guy does at 215. I was like, great, see you then. went uh can you go to a random gp yeah i called the doctor i called them and said is there did

any of the doctors have any availability this other and they went oh yeah this guy does it 215 i was like great see you then i actually didn't even know you could do that i thought you had to go to like because if they don't have your stuff on file is that a thing well i took a photo of the box and was like i've been taking these they're being really great can you give me another script and he went yep i did i, I genuinely did not know you could do that. Well, welcome to the Edgenational podcast. Edgenational. Edgenational podcast.

And I hope you and Bridget can have your stresses quelled. But the thing is, is I just don't know why you don't make things easier for yourself. Like if you know that this is something that happens, and I get that you found a solution, whatever. Every 30 days. Yeah, so every 30 days you know. So if it's every 30 days, wouldn't you, A,

just make a monthly appointment or, like, change what you're doing so that then it's easier? No, I'm fucking, I'm upset now. Because what did you tease me about? Because I was like, you know what? I will use Gmail. I'll put a calendar reminder every four weeks. Hey, Ryan, you've got a week to go.

Yeah. Because you're right. Maybe I can just automate this process. Yeah, but, like, you could make it so easy for yourself. What did you tease me and bully me about? Something has popped up in our shared calendar. I went to put something in the other day and I said, oh, Ryan, can you do that day because you have to give BJ his worming tablet.

There's like an hour block. Well, I put it in the calendar. Give BJ his worming tablet. And then Tony's like, oh, we might go film these. Oh, sorry. Someone has to give a dog a tablet. And you tease me mercilessly for a whole day it was more that it was an hour in the middle of the day that i was like oh well can you move

that you know it was just a little bit of fun just a bit of fun the thing is is that you can make these things so much easier for yourself and you're trying but if you want me to do it don't bully me when i do it but it's like it's the same as then you go, oh, my God, like my phone's dead and I can't use it. I'm like, put it on charge. Oh, I don't know where my tablets are at and I've got to find a doctor at the last minute. Organise it.

Do it in order. There's just so many simple things that you could do that as someone who loves you frustrate me because your life could be simpler. You could literally take that intention, worry, burden out of your brain and put it into a calendar or into a recurring doctor's appointment or into an organized tablet sheet. Hey, Cam, I've got to, let me reread the topic. I'm going to call Bridget. That's what I have to do. What does someone do that annoys you, that it impacts you in no way at all?

to do. What does someone do that annoys you, that it impacts you in no way at all? But it does impact me because I love you and I want your life to be easier. And that's what Bridget's saying as well. Your beautiful wife is saying, why don't you just make things easier for yourself? Speaking of my beautiful wife, what else is scheduled in the Google calendar? Bridget giving birth. Yeah. Yeah. That's in from, I think it wasm. to midday. Yeah. And I've got an interview in the morning. And so when I went to put that in, I went, oh, do you mind if I, is that going to conflict with what you've got? What is it? Oh, your wife's giving birth.

Yeah. And I invited Bridget. So Bridget got a calendar invitation. Oh, I'm giving birth. Yeah. Oh, I better lock that one in. Yeah. Oh, God, I've got to move my nails appointment.

Now, I put into the Facebook group, Tony and Ryan on Facebook, what does your partner do that fucks you off that impacts you in no way at all? Floodgates open. I mean, if there's one thing people love, it's talking about themselves and bitching about their partners. So here's the issue. Or housemate or whoever. It's so good.

I think people just saw what does your partner do that fucked you off and their eyes lit up it was like christmas finally i can get this stuff off my chest and i can't express how important the line was that impacts you in no way at all yeah for instance a lot of oh my husband uh trims his beard in the sink and the little hairs go everywhere and then i have to clean it that affects you back to you that affects it fucked yes but does it impact you also yes not what i'm asking so i have to weave through about 400 comments so i was like i'm with you girl not what i'm asking but not what i'm asking for example jordan says my husband is the most annoying person in the world and i fucking hate him okay because he can only read out loud.

Can you imagine how excruciating going to a restaurant with this fuckhead is? Okay. Imagine living with this guy during lockdown when he was at home, doing emails on the laptop. Okay, so that is incredibly infuriating, but it does impact you. Because that's annoying as fuck. It is annoying. Could you imagine? Could you imagine?

Could you imagine? Oh, sorry, that's actually giving me a headache. That's too much for me. I can't deal with that. You know what? Sorry. Do you know what? During lockdown. It doesn't impact Tony, though.

Just because you mentioned lockdown, when Torbs and I both had to work from home, he was on, like, one side of our home office. Like, our spare room got turned into our home office. He was on one side and I was on the other. And he has a fucking mechanical keyboard. You know those really clacky keyboards? So I'm, like, typing like a normal person on my MacBook. Like, really soft beautiful like

an angel dancing on a fairy's hymen and then literally in the background torbs on his fucking mechanical keyboard i'm sure it wasn't that bad oh my god the clack of a mechanical keyboard needs to get in the fucking bin why doesn't he have a proper keyboard because it's like a gaming keyboard or something anyway sorry that does affect me so i've done exactly what you asked people to not do um continue please within the 500 comments i found two or three maybe we need to open it up for next week and just let anybody go wild yeah it's like get something off your chest. Yeah. Chantel, I fucking hate it when my husband falls asleep so easily and I'm just laying in bed wishing I can sleep. Pisses me right off. Yeah, because, yeah, it doesn't impact you, but it's annoying.

Getting to sleep shouldn't impact my getting to sleep, but it does because it makes me so mad because I get so worked up then I can't sleep anymore. See, I'm that person in my relationship. I literally get into bed and I'm like, can you put the TV on? Torb says, yep, and then I fall asleep. Alex, when I ask my husband to do something

instead of a simple yes, he says sure. The absolute fuck out of me. Fuck off, Alex. Fuck off, Alex. You don't like that? Torb says, if I go, oh, what time's the doctor's appointment today? He goes, three o'clock, I believe.

What's wrong with that? It just fucking grinds my gears. Why? It's just so annoying. Just say it's at three o'clock or I reckon it's at 3. 3 o'clock, I believe. What are you, a fucking politician? So cute.

3 o'clock, I believe. The studies would suggest around 3. Yeah, like I'm not asking for a fucking economic study. I'm with you. You and Alex can hang out. Yep. Beck says, when my husband watches YouTube, it fucks me off completely. When he's watching it on his phone, because he likes watching a lot of YouTube.

Fair. When he's watching his phone, I'll be like, oh, you can put it on the TV if you want. And he's like, nah, it's all good. And then she's like, oh, you know, you can turn your phone like this way. So the screen's a bit bigger. He's like, nah, don't worry about it. I'm fine. And then proceeds to watch on the tiniest fucking screen of all time. There are other options.

The screen could be bigger. You could enjoy watching more peacefully. This completely fucking sends me, even though I'm not watching, that impacts me in no way whatsoever. It just makes me so mad. I get that. I think that's the. It just makes me so mad. I get that. I think that's the same as the pill thing. Yeah.

I just think that I could make your life better if you changed one thing. I get, I totally get that. It's also like have you ever, like if someone's doing that next to you and you go, why don't you pop it on the big TV? And they go, no, it's fine. And I go, I can half hear what, like, it's more annoying that I can only half hear what you're watching. Whereas if it was on the TV, I could decide whether I wanted

to tune in or tune out. But something niggling away, like, in my half my ear is more annoying than it just being on the telly. If I was watching YouTube, like, a full-length 20-minuter like this, would that annoy you? Yeah, it would. It actually, yeah, it would, 100%. And the other thing that you do is you have screen lock on.

So whenever you go to show me a video, you go, oh, hang on, and then you go, oh, hang on, and then you go to fucking slide the thing down every time. You know that the screen lock is on. You know that it's not going to change when you... Sorry. Sorry. Sorry.

It's Monday. We shouldn't be doing this. Was this not a great start to the week? Was this not a great idea? If you have something, and I can't be more clear about this, that does not impact you in the slightest. Yeah, the great examples that you gave, yeah. Thank you, because it took.

Yeah, it was a comb of the, yeah. I should get a job with Rio Tinto. The mining I had to do to go through and to find those. Don't know if I'll pay that. Thumbs down. See, it does feel good, doesn't it? Yeah, it does. That hurt a little bit.

Please leave a comment on the episode thread in the Facebook group because I love this shit. Yeah, of something that your partner or housemate does that fucks you off but does not impact you. And I think what you get out of this is not only do you get to vent your frustration, but it turns out it's going to fuck Tony off as well. So maybe there's some, like, camaraderie.

Yeah. Yep. I'll stick with you. Amongst the flapped taffers in the community. I'll stick with you. Yep. All right. Coming up next, a vicious rumour.

Dun, dun, dun. Hey, it's Amy from Hamilton, New Zealand, and I approve this podcast. A massive shout out to a few of our champion tapas over at our Patreon. Blake Clubberley. Cubberley. Cubberley. Sorry, I said Clubberley by accident. One of the OGs. Yes.

Alice Brown. Bella Carlini Rath. Jenny Stowers. Sally F. And Lee Kelly Rapley. Thank you so much for being part of the Patreon. Absolutely love to see it. Thanks, Kelly Rapley.

Yeah. Her name's Moody as well. Lee Kelly Rath and Rapley. Yeah. What do you think of hyphen names? I used to have a problem with it, but I don't really know why. But now I get it because I understand why people would hyphenate if they didn't want to lose, like, their family name.

So you know how you semi-attracted to Nick Goldsberrydon, who drives the Audi? Oh, Nick Jr. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So his last name. I was just talking to him the other day. Really? Your mate Nick Jr., yeah. Last name Gold, Nick Jr. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So his last name. I was just talking to him the other day. Really? Your mate Nick Jr., yeah.

Last name Goldsberryden. Yeah. And when we were in high school, I think he might have been friends with my mate Vicky Law Sparks. Oh, yeah. And the joke was. If they got married. It's like, when does it end?

Like, surely it's only one generation that can do this because of a sudden, like. That's a really good point. Get out of hand. Well, yeah. I've actually never thought about that. But, yeah, what if all four names, what was it? Gosford, Reid and Lawspar.

Yeah. Yeah. Can I buy a vow? Fucking hell. Would you give the kid a middle name? You would lose, you would run out of room on, like, any form. You know, like on the passport form, there's only, like, 18 boxes or something.

So when Nick and I played volleyball together, you have your, like, surname on the back of your jersey and he hated it because he sometime and it was always a mystery like what's going to turn up yeah because with my last name done like they just printed so easy yeah and so sometimes it'd be like an extra small font and he's like that's a bit embarrassing it's really tiny yeah only one or the other name oh no because that's like a big taboo imagine if the the dad rocks up and goes, well, where's fucking my name? Oh, yeah, sure. It's a bit of a political thing there.

And then so one time it was like Goldsboro Dash and then a second line. That would be better, wouldn't it? Because it's at least not just really small font. Yeah, but it still just takes up a lot of space on a shirt. Yeah, and also when the referee's like, oh, and Dunn bloody does this and Goldsboro, you know, like, you know, that's how I lodge. Easy. Easy, done.

No, fast, no, mass. Wait. No, anyway. It's time to talk about this vicious rumour. I have no idea what this is. I'm very stressed. You actually do know. Am I involved?

You may be called as a witness. Oh. And where was the, you said you found this online? I've just heard rumours. Oh, okay, sorry. Rumours have been coming from within my household. There's been little side comments, little side eyes. And Cam, you may also need to be a witness for this as well.

Am I in trouble? No. No, no, no. But you may also need to be a witness for this as well. Am I in trouble? No. No, no, no. But you may need to. But I've been implicated in the case. No. You may need to help get me out of trouble actually. Oh, okay. Yeah, I can do that.

Because I'm the one who's been accused of doing that. I'll lie to anyone for you. Great. I mean, tell the truth. It's a year of honesty. Yeah. There's been a vicious rumour circulating about me. I've been accused of doing something.

Fuck off. And I didn't do it. Say I didn't do it. Well, no, I want to hear what it was first. Year of honesty. I'm not going to lie. Well, no, I want to hear what it was first. Year of Honesty.

I'm not going to lie. I've been accused of having one drink and blurting out my baby's name in a restaurant. Oh, I find that a found and guilty. So there's been some comments. So, yeah. Yeah. But my friends will back me up, won't they? That you did it, yeah. No, that I would yeah. But my friends will back me up, won't they?

That you did it, yeah. No, that I would never. Well, that you did it. So this happened. No, no. The alleged happened. The alleged occurred. No, the alleged did not happen. No, but the alleged event occurred while we were together.

There was Ryan, you and your wife. It was me and my boyfriend, Torbs. Our producer, Cam, was there. And my editor from the publishing company that made my book was also there. Well, when you say was there, already blasphemy because saying there implies that it happened. No, I'm saying the alleged event. Don't get defensive. I am defensive.

The alleged event occurred and we were all there. I am defensive. The alleged event occurred and we were all there. I went home with my boyfriend, Torbs, and producer Cam. And when the alleged event occurred. It didn't happen. Everyone said, oh, I didn't hear anything. Cam heard.

No, just hang on. No, I mean, what did he hear? Everyone went, oh, I didn't hear anything, don't worry about it. Three of us got in the car and I was like, did everyone hear? And they're like, yep. So it did happen. All three of us heard it. But we pretended to be cool because I didn't want to upset anyone. No, I know that you heard.

It was my night as well. Yeah, it was your night. I was trying to steal your thunder. I knew that you heard because you're not good enough. And I just didn't say anything and I never did that. No, you said a lot. You actually said a lot. Did I?

I was pretty drunk. Tony, yeah, I mean. And again, I don't drink and I just get drunk so quickly. It's not good for me. I don't want to like characterise, incorrectly characterise you. Character assassinate. Yeah. But tell me if this is like a common Tony Lodge trait.

You like to know the plan. You like to know what's going to happen and what we're going to do and what time we're leaving and what's going to happen when we leave. You like a plan. Yeah. And when things like go off script, you're like, oh, I didn't plan for this. Yeah. So after

the alleged happened, you said, I don't know what to do. I don't know what to say. Do I acknowledge it said, I don't know what to do. I don't know what to say. Do I acknowledge it? I don't know what to do. I don't know what to do. Addy's ringing a bell. Yep.

I think that might have occurred. Because, again, you hadn't had time to plan because we weren't. It wasn't because it hadn't been planned. It was more just that I was like it had obviously happened. No, like let's not be crazy. It had obviously happened and I wasn't going to insult anyone's intelligence by being like, oh, what? And pretend I hadn't heard it.

Well, you said 10 seconds ago that's what you did. Well, that's what I thought I had done. New evidence has come to light. You know, because that's just rude. Yeah. But you did do it. Tony. You did do it.

Like, you did. You did do it. You did say it. Rumours. Vicious rumours that I thought were going to be quelled by my friends. Or quashed? Quelled. I don't know what you're saying.

But you did say it. Cam? It was buttress by the fact that all the awkwardness after meant that you had said it because if you had not said it, you wouldn't have been so awkward after, but you did that. Yeah. But also you went, you said the name. Yep.

And you said the name and then Bridget went, mate, and you went. Yeah. I did not do that. That is a Tony Lodge sound. Yes, you did. I did not. You did. You, like, fully overreacted as well.

So no one could just, like, let it go because everybody acknowledged it. Bridget acknowledged it. You acknowledged it. I said, I don't know what to do. Torbs and Cam at least were polite enough to be like, I didn't hear. But I was just like, I've obviously heard. And I was sitting the furthest away as well. I was like on the other end of the table.

You were sitting the furthest away. Many disputes there. First of all, Torbs worked poker face I've seen in the biz. Okay. He goes, oh, I didn't really hear it. I was like, mate, I can read the name on your forehead. Yeah. He had had a martini.

Yeah. So, I mean, that's just rocket fuel. Torbs, that's just really lightningini. Yeah. So, I mean, that's just rocket fuel. For dwarves, that's just real animal. Yeah. I think someone went, oh, we didn't hear her. And Cam was like, no, I did. Yeah. So the thing is, is that you're actually, like,

trying to make us feel bad for hearing when you're the one that said it. No. And I actually hate that you're saying that. No. Because what was I supposed to do? You're victim blaming. It's actually the opposite. You're victim blaming.

That's what a victim blamer would say. But, like, you said it. Everyone ignored. It wasn't just me. Even the waiter was like, oh, that's a nice name. Yeah. Fuck up. I didn't say anything.

Yeah. Who is? So, like, I don't know. You know, I don't, I, again, don't know what to do. But, like, I haven't told anybody. I obviously haven't said it on the podcast. And I'm, like, obviously not going to say anything. Why is it a thing that we don't say it until they're born?

I think it's to keep something a surprise, isn't it? I actually don't know. It's one of those things where, is there an answer, Cam? Oh, I think it's just a convention that a lot of people have experiences where if you say oh little maxi's coming and they go oh i know i know a fuckhead called maxi oh yeah but wouldn't you want to know that max is a fuckhead before you call it max is it a bit like when you say oh we're due on x day and they go oh my husband's mom's wedding anniversary is that day or you know how know how you hear those stories of like, I thought it was going to be Max, but when I held him,

he was clearly a Ben or something. And you're like, well, if I tell everyone what it is and I can't, we're backing ourselves into a corner. Because we chose one at Christmas and it was locked in, done and dusted. Really? And that's not it. It's out. Yeah, right.

So is the name that I heard, is that the final name or is this like a top five situation? There's a top three. Okay. And that is like. But this is the front that I heard, is that the final name or is this like a top five situation? There's a top three. Okay. And that is like. But this is the front runner at the moment. At the moment. But again, we.

Can I say something? Sure. It was beautiful. Thank you. Like I. Actually though? Yeah, like I heard it. No, and I was like, that wasn't, it wasn't what I expected,

but I was like, but it is lovely. Cam? Yes. He's a partial. I know an arsehole. But I think, well, again, if I had blurted it out at Christmas, it would not be that name now. It's the name at the moment.

Yep. But I think what's been the trickiest thing is when we're at home, we'll say like, say the baby's name's Tony. We're like, oh, in Tony's room. Yeah. We don't say like. In the baby's room. We say in Tony's room.

Oh, that's a nice outfit for Tony to wear. Yeah. And so then when people come over. I can't believe you're calling your baby Tony. I'm so flattered. You're welcome. Yeah. But then it's weird because when people come over, I'm like, yeah,

and that's the baby's room. Like I've seen that. And then I um so my mom to combat that my mom called me ernie they gave me like a name is that why they have a what is it called like a like a baby name yeah because i know uh my mate taylor it was it was peanut yeah so like i think so that you can name it without calling it it or whatever so whenever my dad would come home or whatever and he'd be like, how's Ernie going today?

Right. Instead of like because they didn't know whether I was a boy or a girl, even though that doesn't matter because they were going to call me Tony whether I was a boy or a girl anyway, which is like fuck from the beginning. Yeah. Maybe we should have implemented that because maybe people do that so they don't just blurt it out in a restaurant. Yeah, like my sister called one of her sons was Sesame.

Yeah. Because I think when they found out they were the size of a sesame. I thought it was because he planted the seed. And then the other baby was Raspberry because I think that when they found out. So it was like, how's Rassey kind of thing, which is quite cute. Because I've spent a lot of time talking to the baby. Yeah, of course. And apparently you don't need to.

So one of the issues at the moment is because I'm like, hey, baby, it's dad. And he's like, you actually don't need to yell at her. She's like, she's just there. She's in the room. She's just there. Yeah. And my face is like right up in there.

Yeah. In there? No, like in the stomach. The tummy. Yeah. Don't make that hand gesture. Well, sorry. Yeah.

Well, you said right up in there. Yeah, I did. In fact, when I said it. And that is where the baby is. Yep, that's where it comes from. Oh, my God. I almost said the stomach. The tummy, yeah. Don't make that hand gesture. Well, sorry. No, Valida. Well, you said right up in there. Yeah, I did. In fact, when I said it, it felt weird. And that is where the baby is. Yep, that's where it comes from. Oh, my God, I almost said the name. I didn't know. I said the baby.

I've been not hearing any vicious rumours that you've been saying names. I have not. I didn't even. I would like to present some evidence to the thing. Blah, whatever. Producer Cameron, none of us even said the name. We just said, did you hear it? And I was like, we all heard it, right?

And they went, yep, yep. But none of us said the name because I was like, I don't want to say it. It's not my name to say yet. I'm like, that's your name to say. I love the name though. I do like it. I think it's beautiful.

Okay, thank you. It's a bit different as well. I didn't think it would have an X in it. There's a little xylophone. I don't know any words with X in it. How should we, like, say the name? Will that be, like, first step back from the journey leave? Yeah, I guess so.

But, I mean, see, do you know what's also crazy? Is that, like, the IG post, et cetera. You know, there's, like, a whole thing, isn't it? Things you can say with a new baby and also in the bedroom. Because it's like. That'll be our post. That's funny. Is it?

Yeah. Okay. Because it's like, is that the official announcement? Is the podcast the official announcement? It's like with anything now. And this is live brainstorm. And why does everyone think they're needed? Can't you just have the child?

You know what I mean? No, no, no. But like, because obviously people want to know what you've called it and that it's healthy and how heavy it was and whatever and see the first pictures or whatever. I don't know what weights mean. Like when people go, oh, welcoming little Patrice to the world. They weigh this much.

Is that big? Is that small? I have no idea. And because they use pounds. Is that good? They use pounds. That means nothing to me. To be honest, I'm a metric girl and kilos probably wouldn't mean that much to me either.

The exchange rate's killing us. I go, well, what's that about hot chicken? Like, you know, what are we looking at here? What are we looking at here? More of a stuffed turkey. Yeah, or a bag of taters. What's that? A kilo? You know, how's that, about hot chicken? Like, you know, what are we looking at here? What are we looking at here? More of a stuffed turkey. Yeah, or a bag of taters. What's that, a kilo? You know, how much are we really looking at?

I didn't fuck you up. So I'm just like, I don't know measurements. I don't know it. And so then I'll go to the deli and they go, oh, how much do you want? And I go, oh, like a fist and then like two little pincers. Yeah. People would say that at the deli and it would be good because it's like a,

like a, what's the word? Tangible. Tangible, yeah. Yeah, okay. A handful, that makes sense. What about when I rock up and I go, oh, just enough for three, but like I'm pretty hungry, but Bridge doesn't love it. Oh, no, that's annoying.

Because I don't know who you are. I don't know who Bridge is. Yeah. What are you throwing it off for, Bridge? I don't know. I don't know what those words mean in that situation. All all right so i think we can all agree it didn't happen is what i'm here yeah i'm gonna be so surprised to hear the name oh fuck you if you do the same thing that you did oh no so when the pregnancy post went out and you were like oh so glad oh

why does it have to be an official post when we said we were expecting and then you did the really lame comment of I'm so glad we can. So glad we can tell people. Are you going to do that on this post? No. Welcoming the baby. Nah. It's too important.

Daughter McDaughter face and you'll go, oh, my God, I'm so glad we can tell everyone the name we discussed. This is too important, I think. You did it last week. Yeah. Well, I'll see how. Maybe if I'm in a, like, silly goose mood on the day, maybe I will. Okay.

All right. What do you love to say? Well, I've got a tweet that I saw that I fucking absolutely loved. It's from AtVeryFawny, and it says, the girl in front of me in a lecture was watching Grey's Anatomy and looked back and saw me staring. So she put on the subtitles. Girls support girls.

Women for women. Yeah. I love that. I just feel like if that was me, I would take, I'd be like, oh my God, how embarrassing. I'd like shut my laptop. But instead she went, oh babe, if you want to watch as well. She fucking hit the subtitles and then they both enjoyed it. The fact that that was her first, because she's like, oh, poor sweetheart,

she can't hear what's going on. Yeah. That is very selfless and considerate. Isn't it? I love that. I loved it too. I thought you loved to see that. I do love to see that.

Do we know what the class was? I'm hoping they're not like. I'm hoping it wasn't nursing. Yeah. Yeah, or, you know. Or maybe they're like, oh, look, I know the lecturer reckons do it this way, but as you can see, Dr. Gray reckons if I can just stuck a knife in there? Yeah. Yeah, or, you know. Or maybe they're like, oh, look, I know the lecturer reckons to do it this way, but as you can see, Dr Grey reckons if I can just stuck a knife in there.

Yeah, or like many years later, are you in the ER? And they're like, this man's about to bleed out. What do we do? They go, fuck, that was the day I was watching Grey's Anatomy and that tweet went viral, but at what cost? At what cost? This person's life. Greg has tweeted,

my husband stayed home from work because the dog was coughing and was like, I'm going to have to take the dog to the vet. I'll have to call in sick and not go to work. Yep. So we took him to the vet and paid the $85. The vets, they don't miss you, do they? No, they don't. And the dog kind of looks like BJ, which makes me love this even more. We paid the vet $85 for the vet to tell us that the dog was fake coughing

and knew what he was doing and got to spend the day with his owner. I love that. If I just cough a little bit in the morning, I already love the day off. We'll get to go in the car. Yeah. We'll drive down. And he always passes me a little bone when we're at the vet as well. A little bone.

Then we'll come back and I'll curl up on the couch and I'll just have a day with Dad. I used to do that as a kid so I could hang out with my mum so it makes sense. Oh, the little puppy eyes. Yeah. Oh, Dad, I'm sick. What a sweetheart.

I might do that later in the week so that Torb stays home from work. I might do that later in the week so that Torb stays home from work. Tomorrow on the show, Confessions is back, but it is a true crimes confession. Did you know there's criminals in the tarpa community? What? Yeah. How much do I say about it?

Okay. No, don't say. It involves some sticky buns and a disappearing man. I've said too much. Can you... Like come and ghost. Sorry. What? Sorry, nothing.

See you tomorrow. Love you, bye.