Toni and Ryan - Who's The Toughest TARPer?

Episode Date: July 28, 2025

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Who's the baddest? Amy vs Emily. Amy carried all the groceries from the car boot to the kitchen bench in one go. Oh, she's the winner. Don't even need to hear the other one. Hi, I'm Annabelle from Dubbo, New South Wales. I'm Caitlin from Newark in the UK. This is Alison and Bailey from Dallas, Texas and I approve this podcast. Welcome to a Tuesday.

Hello. Big announcement coming up today. We'll get to that really soon. Very fun. But first, a brand new segment. I've called it What's the Toughest Tapa. Yeah. Who's the toughest tarpa?

I did put a post in the Facebook group saying, what makes you a tough. Carla Conti. Carla Conti, but we didn't want to use that word because. Too much baby. We'll say it a lot. Yeah. But first, Tony has some ideas for the name as well.

Well, I thought that, cause tough C word, I thought like, formidable floozy stiff shrew tough tramp oh so okay who's the toughest tramp is it renee or kate who's the strongest slut non-derogatory who like and then the last one that I had was well-built witch Who, and then the last one that I had was Well Built Witch. So who's the most well built witch? Okay, let's do the first one. Which one was that? No, it was in like the first one and we'll see what name feels right.

I do like Taffa's Taffa, but obviously I've gone down a different path. And I was laughing so hard when I was- What was the second one? Was Formidable Flusi, Stiff Shrew. Swift, Swift Shrew won't... Swift Shrew is good. It is. I did say Stiff Shrew.

Stiff Shrew, I just, I don't know if I've got the pronunciation skills to say that regularly. Yeah. I went with alliteration because that's your fave. It is. Yeah. Stiff Shrew. To say that regularly. Yeah, I went with alliteration because that's your fave. Yeah, it is. Yeah. Stiff Shrew, yeah. Who's the baddest bitch? I think who's the baddest bitch is good.

We've got a story here, who's the baddest bitch? So two top is going head to head. Yep. Yep. First is Renee Ladoux. Hi Renee Ladoux. I just completed my 30th chemo treatment and have finally kicked breast cancer's ass. Holy sh- 30th. Oh Renee.

Yeah, so Renee's up against Kate. Kate Stevenson. Hi Kate. I just came back from an all-inclusive holiday but they didn't have Diet Coke so I had to drink Coke Zero the whole time. Who's the baddest bitch? Coke Zero sucks. Coke Zero does suck. That's pretty huge from Kate. What were the other names you were liking? Baddest bitch, toughest tarpa. Well-built witch, strong slut.

Who's the strongest slut out of Renee LaDoux and Kate Stephenson? Can I just ask a quick question? Did Renee LaDoux post this on the thread that was like what makes you a tough Yeah, Carla Conti. Yeah, okay. She didn't know she was entering a fight. Yeah, I don't think the fight works in this very specific situation. I get the comedies as cancer or Coke Zero. Let's call it that. And today's episode of cancer versus Coke Zero.

What is the worst scene? Renee's pulled the cancer card. And I would too. Like no judgment, I absolutely would. Like, like no judgment. I absolutely would. So we've got to give it to Renee. That's the toughest tarfer. I will say that.

Kog Zero sucks. Kog Zero sucks. Who's the toughest tarfer? All right. Then our next battle is between Melissa and Rachel. Hi, Melissa. Hi, Rachel. Welcome to the ring.

Bing, Bing. Melissa, I drove myself to the hospital whilst in labor. Holy fucking shit balls. I had to stop a few times when the contractions got bad and then I continued on. I realized it's a bit dangerous in high type, but sometimes a tough tarp, I gotta do what a tough tarp I gotta do. Isn't that incredible?

I first of all, cannot even imagine the what's going through your mind. You're like, I mean, I just have to get to the hospital. Like you just have to get there. Um, and I, it's going to start getting there, but it's going to be better when I'm there. So I just got it. Oh yeah. And I am like, I hate it when people use their phone in the car. I wind down my window and talk to people at the lights.

If I see them using their phone, like I absolutely, it's disgusting. And she just said, I know it's not the safest thing in hindsight, but like, fuck me. Like obviously. Yeah. Like I'm saying that as like a, like witch in the car. Are you saying she's a tough topper? That's a pretty tough topper.

She's up against Rachel McLean. What did Rachel do? I dislocated my left knee at my 21st while dancing to the watch me whip, watch me nay nay. And I dislocated it as it said, break your legs. And I kept dancing that night. And then the next day went to the Groove and the Moon music festival before finally going to the doctor the following night.

Well, I mean, if she did it at the part of the song where it says, break your legs, that's not tough. That's just following instructions. Yeah, but to be specific, she didn't break her legs. She just dislocated her knee. So she didn't really. Oh, so that's not that tough. Yeah. I asked you to break your leg and you've just dislocated her knee. Oh, so she didn't real... Oh, so that's not that tough. Yeah. I asked you

to break your leg and you've just dislocated it. I don't know. During Watch Me Whip, Watch Me Nae Nae. Driving yourself while you're in labor. I cannot even... What a feat of a person. Yeah. That is absolutely insane. So that's Melissa. Are you saying she's the toughest tarpa? I love all my tarpas equally. Driving while you're in labor is just... When I... At least Renee was probably drunk or something. She was something.

You know, that was getting her through the pain. You know, like... Well, once Melissa got to the hospital,, that was getting her through the pain. You know, like. Well, once Melissa got to the hospital, she would have taken something for the pain. Yeah, the green whistle or something. What do you reckon? Fuck you.

It's pretty hard to keep dancing with a dislocated knee. Yeah, that's pretty brave. Yeah. I didn't, what I didn't consider when I was conjuring up the game of toughest tapas is that Tony doesn't like to say anyone's not the wind. Like, yeah, I just want to run to be a winner. And I did the classic mum thing of I love everyone equally.

But I just don't think that I can vote against someone who kept dancing for three days straight because that's amazing. But I also don't think that I can vote against someone who drove themselves to the hospital without giving birth. Here's what I want to make clear just because they aren't named the toughest half of them. Doesn't mean they aren't tough. And doesn't mean they're weak. Doesn't mean they aren't a bad bitch. Yeah doesn't mean they aren't a celestial slut. What was that one? A well-built witch. Yeah. Strong slut. That's it. So you're going with Rachel? No. Watch me whip. Watch me

na na. Is that what's the? Yeah. Yeah. Watch me whip, whip, watch me nae nae. Do you know what that song always makes me think of though? Like I whip my hair back and forth, I whip my hair back and forth, just whip it, whip it real good. No, I've got to give it to the lady in labor. Melissa. Charles, you disagree? I don't know. Like you've you dislocate, like, and then you keep dancing and then you go to a festival the next day. That's pretty fucking huge.

Her knee's fucking out. But also, I don't I would never do that. But that's not the question. I think it might have to be Renee. Women give birth every day. Rachel. No, I take that back. Rachel.

I take that back. What? Rachel. Renee was the- Renee was the- Chemo. Sorry, the chemo. Oh, good on you Renee.

Just too many tough bitches. Yeah, they're all tough. Finally, we have Amy versus Emily. Hi, Amy. Hi, Emily. Ding, ding. Amy carried all the groceries from the car boot to the kitchen bench in one go.

Shit's the winner. Don't even need to hear the other one. I had that last night where I'm like, I'm only doing one trip. One trip. And if it doesn't make it into my arms, it's staying in the car for the night because fuck no. That's me when I get to the office every day. I've normally got like, you know, my handbag with my laptop, it's staying in the car for the night because fuck no. That's me when I get to the office every day.

I've normally got like, you know, my handbag with my laptop in at my lunchbox, my water, like all my stuff. I'm only walking up them stairs once. Yeah, if there's any parcels in the car and I can't get that in my hand, they're staying. So Amy, after a good start. Yeah. Up against Emily Williams. Who dislocated her leg while giving birth during chemo.

Emily was on a very full hot bus. Isn't that just awful? And she's there with her toddler. And because of the heat and the movement and it's full, the toddler starts sort of going, like the toddler is going to throw up. So Emily Williams didn't want the vomit to go all over the passengers and the Oh no. Like the toddler is going to throw up. So Emily Williams didn't want the vomit to go all over the passengers and the bus and down the aisle because there's a packed bus.

So Emily Williams pulls her top open so her toddler could throw up down her cleavage and save the floor and the passengers. I quickly got off the bus and ran home. Absolute tough sea energy, says Emily. Oh, that not only is that tough, it's disgusting. But respectful of others, but respectful of others. And also, you know, when someone's about to throw like a kid or your pet or whatever, and you just are like, I've got to just do something.

That's real quick thinking. That's pretty tough. Do you think, saying like a creative, innovative agency that does creative and amazing things, they should get a dog that's about to vomit in the corner and be like, we need a solution in 10 seconds. Oh yeah. Because something happens to your brain where you just

you're in action. Instant creativity. Though your wife though, she's not good in an emergency. So maybe the vomiting dog wouldn't be that helpful. She's not, but she wouldn't be in the creative lab. Oh, rough. Poor Pritch. Well, she's not good under pressure.

Yeah, no, she's not. Now you already backed in Amy pretty hard. Oh yeah. In fact, have you, has she already answered Charles? It's like, I feel like Tony. It was. Direct quote, she wins back at in done. But that, oh, but that is really tough. As in like that's bad bitch shit. As in like that's bad bitch shit. Being a mom on a bus with your kid, I mean, even without the vomit that I'm being swayed that way. You imagine being on your bus with,

on a bus with your kid. Yeah. That would just like, there's so many people around. Emily Weems, you wicked witch. Yeah. Is Emily the one who did the vomit in the shirt? Yep.

I think so Emily. Yeah. Congratulations. Oh, yeah. I don't know if we can do the toughest tupper as a head to head fight. You don't like it? It's tough, isn't it? I'm the toughest tupper because I had to pick.

And you are the toughest tupper. I work so hard. Hi, I'm Annabelle from Darwin News of World. I'm Caitlin from Newark in the UK. This is Alison and Bailey from Dallas, Texas. And you're listening to Tony and Ryan. A massive shout out to a few of our champion tapas over at our Patreon. They're really keeping the lights on. Jennifer New, thank you Jennifer.

Jade Sage. Two greens. Green green. What's her last name? Green. There's no. Mint. Sapphire.

Is sapphire green? Isn't, I don't know. Isn't that blue? Sapphire. Is Sapphire green? Isn't. I don't know. Is that blue Sapphire? Yeah. Yeah. That's really embarrassing. Cat kiss. Eucalyptus.

Yes. Eucalyptus do. That's funny. You go. Tara McGinn. good on you Tara. Rochelle, love you Rochelle. Julia Gus, Furion Lust. I don't think that's a like, Furion Lust is all one word.

So I'm really sorry if I fucked that up. Lacey Allen, thank you very much for being part of the Patreon. Absolutely love to see it. Big surprise. Big surprise. Big announcement. Tony love to see it. Big surprise. Big surprise. Big announcement. Tony put on that hat.

Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. Sorry, wrong hat. Yours says captain, mine says vice captain. We're putting on our boat hats because the announcement is, hoo, hoo. Somewhere in the world, next Saturday will be the Tony and Ryan podcast's fourth birthday party.

You! Woo! Saturday the 9th of August a gym ball has just fired off in the office for some reason. A feed ball has rolled into Charles. Oh my god the ghost that lives here is excited about the boat party. Now the first official clue will be this Thursday. Every day next week, there'll be more official clues. But I think an unofficial pretty good clue

is the fact that it is a boat party. And have we decided that like... Sorry, it's really funny that you're wearing like a really warm jacket and a captain's hat. Sorry, vice captain's hat. Close your eyes. Oh, I can't be shirtless when I take my clothes off.

I mean, when I open my eyes. Okay. Now I look like a guy who recently did a tarpathon and had his chest waxed. It's coming back quite well. I feel like a child. Coming back quite well. We are having a birthday party on Saturday, August 9th on a motherfucking boat. On a boat.

And I feel like it's fair to say is that this city or wherever it is in the world is close to a body of water. Well, not necessarily. The boat. We haven't said that the boat will be moving. It's going to be docked in the desert. Might be in someone's front yard. Okay. The clue is there's a boat in that town.

There's a boat there. Yeah. There will be a boat there next Saturday. Yes, there might not be a boat there currently. Oh, also currents water. Next Saturday. Massive boat full of tarpas. You got to figure out the clues. Yeah. Figure out where the fuck this boat party is and meet us there.

When can I put my shirt back on? Now's fine. Yeah, okay, great. And I will say like last year we went to London and we met 1000 tarpers at a pub in London and we gave all the clues, people figured it out and like everyone was chatting about it. So we're really excited because it was so fun.

Yeah. Like the lead up was so fun. Yeah. Like the lead up was so fun and sharing the clues and everything. So very exciting stuff. Watch this space. Thursday is the next official clue. These are great, by the way. Shout out, Lily, for getting these captain's hats. Well, one of us has a captain's hat.

I've got a vice captain's hat. Yeah. Charles, what's your hat say on yours? Um, it's. I wanted Charles's to say head of se hat. Yeah. Charles, what's your hat say on yours? Um, it's I wanted Charles's to say head of semen. Yeah. Charles's second mate. Charles's second mate. And guess what? Everyone, Lily has put on her own hat. Masturbate.

Chief mate. That feels pretty senior. That feels higher than a captain almost. I feel higher than a vice captain. Do you reckon? Chief mate. Do you know what we should make you the advice captain? That feels higher than a captain almost. A chief. Definitely feels higher than a vice captain. Do you reckon? Chief mate? Do you know what we should make you the advice captain?

Like, cause you're good at giving advice. Who said that? Sorry. I did just Google and it says no, the captain is a higher in rank than a chief mate. The chief mate is second in command after the captain though. Yeah so that's when where am I at? So yeah where's the vice captain for? Oh it's not it's not.

It's unclear. Yeah. No you you and me we'll be up in front steering the ship. Yes the chief mate is higher rank than a vice captain. That's bullshit. In fairness, the way that things work here, that's probably accurate. And I don't know if we're committing to this,

but I believe the Monday episode will be recorded on the boat at the party. Well, Charles is gonna do a bit of a recce. If possible. Yeah, if possible. Once Charles gets on the boat to see if it's possible. But that's what we're hoping for. Yeah.

Yeah. As well as obviously hanging out with everyone and food and drinks and everything. But yeah, it's going to be a big party. Light lunch. Not heavy. Not heavy, because you'll sink. Light lunch.

Yeah. And I'm just trying so hard to. I know. So yeah, shut the fuck up. No. Not to give anything away. But because we are going to be... Oh hang on.

No, shut the fuck up. More details, but it's next Saturday, somewhere in the world, on a motherfucking boat. Mmm. And details later. But we are going to be somewhere warmer.

And no. Well, well, because I'm like wet for life. What's the temperature in Hobart this week, Charles? Well, the public pool is heated. Facts. But because we were talking about, you know, where we're going potentially or where we're staying. Melbourne. Tony's house. The hot tub. There's a boat on the hot tub. But I was like, oh, I wouldn't mind up getting some new like bathers and stuff. And also Torbs and I are like going to Bali for Christmas.

And we've got like the little villa that we've got like has a pool. So I was like, I'm gonna be wet for two weeks. Like that's it. So I decided to, I was like, oh, I might order myself some new bathers. I kind of need some new ones. And they came and they did not fit. And it just makes you feel so shit.

Like bathers especially, cause you're like, oh, I just wanted to get something cool. They like, it's like that they're like too short, but then they're also too long. And like, it was just awful. So I've sent, like I sent them back. And then I was like, you know what? I'm gonna order some more,

but I'm gonna order like a couple of pairs in a couple of sizes, try them all on at once and then send like- The ones I want I'll keep and the rest I'll send back. So I was like, oh, if I'm ordering four pairs of bathers, I'll probably keep one or two and then send the rest back. And is that pretty common practice for a lot of people? And like, because when you try on bathers, they come with like, well, like, I don't know

if this is, oh, maybe you don't even know this. When you buy like women's bathers, they have like hygiene like stickers in the puss so that like you can send them back. Yeah, so they've got like plastic over the puss. I didn't, yeah. I was wondering, I was like, do you have to like wear something? Or you wear them over.

Yeah, so you can try it on with knickers on. Yeah, underneath, yeah. Or like the ones that I bought, and this is pretty common, like they've got plastic on the puss so that then if you're gonna keep them, you peel that off. But if that's being peeled off, you can't return them.

Very fair understanding. And then I'm guessing what they do is then like, if you return them, they peel that off and put a new one on. So that like the next person that gets them then isn't like my pussy juice on their pussy juice and like, can you get pregnant? Like I don't know. Anyway, so then I ended up ordering some bathers and I was like, let's be calm about this. Like you know how you kind of like get yourself into the zone and

you go and they arrived and I went, not today you fucking bitch. Yeah. And I thought I'll try those on tomorrow. Yeah. I thought not today. Great self-awareness, sweetheart. Thank you so much. I have days where I go, it actually doesn't matter how good the pant is. Yeah.

Today is not going to be the day. Today is not the day that I want to find out. Yeah. Or I just feel like a little bloated today and maybe nothing's going gonna fucking fit today. Yep, and that's fine. And tomorrow is a brand new day. And I just thought, you know what, I can't handle this going wrong today.

I thought I've had a bit of a long day. Great self-awareness. Love it. Love it. Thank you. So I put them to the side. I wasn't really like, didn't think about it. And then I get home the next day.

I'm like, I'm ready. It's done. I'm ready. It's done. So I opened up the thing and they're like, beautiful. Like they look stunning. And they actually all fit. So like, like I'm one up like it's fine. And so some of them Yeah, I bought like two different sizes in a few different styles. One piece two piece. So there's two one pieces and yeah, hang on. Yeah, okay, everyone just, whatever you're doing, just take a moment. Two one pieces. Yeah. And two two pieces. Okay, yep. Yep. And they were just, the difference in the two

pieces was just the size. Yep. They were the same style, but the one pieces, I'm actually, I can send you one of them. Ooh. Yeah. This one I ordered, I've just texted you guys the link. It's a little loud for me, but I was like, you know what, that's pretty fun. It's bright red.

Torbz called it a little bit Baywatch. Like, so I tried it on and I was like, you know what, that's pretty fun. It's bright red. Torbz called it a little bit Baywatch. Like, so I tried it on and I was like, what do you reckon? He was like, yeah, you like it's very Baywatch vibes. I read One Piece is very Baywatch vibes. Have you been inspired by my daughter, Mabel, with the white stripes around the outside? You know how her new bathers? That's just in at the moment. Okay.

Yeah, I think that's just a thing though. That little purple One Piece that the long sleeve is so cute, anyway, so of all of them, that was the one that I was like, everything fits. I'll send back the other size of the two piece and probably the red one. Holy fuck. No, that's not. I know. Yep. I know girls' babies cost fucking news. I just didn't realize how much. No, no, no, I know. That's why I was like, I'm obviously gonna send a heat back.

Yeah. Like I literally, I actually- Well, did ya? Okay. So I was like, the red one, the red one, I'll probably send that back because it fits and I quite like it, but it is a little loud.

It is bright red. So, cause I was like, oh, how am I going to pick what to send back now? Like is kind of what I was thinking. It's a good problem. Yeah. Rather than me like they both don't fit. I wasn't like nothing fit, I have to send it all back.

Anyways, I was like, cool, I'll send that one back. All good. I just like pop it all on the bench and I'm like, yep, I'll figure out which ones I wanna send back. But like that one's feeling like the one I'll send back. Later on, like I'm like fucking dealing with Pippa and whatever, Torbz gets home, we're talking about baevers and whatever. And then we've been doing like,

like you foods meals at home because neither of us can be fucking cooking. And Torbz has been getting home at like fucking 9. meals at home, because neither of us can be cooking. And Torbz has been getting home at like fucking 9.30 at night. And so it's just like so much easier because we were just ordering heaps of fucking food and eating shit all the time. So we've been doing that just to take something off our plate and literally,

and I go to like heat up my food and we're like having butter chicken and like you pierce the, you know how you like fork the top and then you put it in the microwave? The food's done in the microwave. And as I go to get it, I've got like a tea towel on my hands. And then as I go to like pull the food out, the container is really hot and like the tea towel's kind of slipping. And I went, ooh, and I dropped it out of my hands,

like onto the bench and through the prick holes of the film on the top, butter chicken sprays out of the plastic. All over the red fucking bathers that I've decided I'm going to set back on the white parts as well. Yeah, like on all the lining around the side. Oh, my God.

And because I've got the tags on, I can't wash them. Like, so then if I was gonna, I have to take the tags off and I can't do that because I can't send them back. So I am- Send them back. No way. I can't send, they're not gonna give me a refund. Imagine you're getting an email going-

And then what? I don't get the bathers and they don't get like- Might as well keep them. Yeah. Imagine you get this email and it's like, is that by the chicken? And they're like. Oh. But see like how it's like. What's spice level though? The little like dots because it's come out of like the pricks. Yeah. Like it's not like a huge like, it's just like sprayed out of the thing. Also, curry, could you think of literally anything harder to get out of clothing? Butter, oily, bright, like just the honestly,

and getting something out of bathers. It's not like getting something out of cotton. Yeah. Like. It's something designed to hold color in liquid. Yes. Like, and so I love though that you guys were like, oh, they are a bit loud.

Well, I am stuck with them. Will you wear those on the boat? That's a great question Charles. At least if I drop food on myself, no one will be able to tell. That's what I mean. Like sometimes, so I've got a few like only at home t-shirts.

Totally. And when we're having a curry and I'm like wearing a white t-shirt, like I'm now Bridget goes, yeah, and me too. Go put one of the other tops on. Yeah. So maybe this is one of your other bathing suits. So if you're, for instance, going on a boat party with lots of tarpers, that if someone spills some bourbon, someone spills some food, someone wants to jump overboard

and go for a swim, you're You're just living the Vedar look. I'm ready to go. Well, the thing is- Great cool tiles. We'll all wear them. I think if I take the tags off, I'll be able to get the- Well, I hope I'll be able to get the stain out. It's just that I can't get it out and then send them back

because I'll have to take the tags off. Yeah. So I'm hoping that if I take the tags off, I'll be able to put them through the wash and get the stain out. You just send the other one back. Or is this too loud? The other one I really like.

What color is the other one? The other one is the same, but black with the white around it. So it's just really like classic. Like that? Yeah, it's that one. They look great. And they are real.

It'd be a shame to send that back. Well, cause that one I definitely will wear. Yeah, the red is a And they are real and they be ashamed to send that back. Well, I because that one I definitely will. Yeah, it is. It's a moment. Well, the red I was like, that's a bit fun and a little bit different. But yes, I can't send those back. Unfortunately, maybe it's the universe telling me that I should just rock a red fucking bathing suit for the better. Do you reckon Charles is wearing a red hoodie today? Oh, you've wearing a red hoodie today. Oh. You've got a daddy gang red on you. Yep.

I am just ready. I love that. Yeah. So. Can you fucking, like of all the things, of all the, and I just went, fuck. And she was like, are you okay? And I was like, you are not gonna fucking believe.

Which part of the bay is this on? So it's on, there's a bunch on the inside of the strap, but then there's a bunch on the lining on the outside. But it's probably, it's here and up, so the top of the tit, and then over the back. Fuck. So it's like, like it's... You'll probably have to jump overboard off the boat

to, and that'll wash it out. But it might, when it might not be on water. We might be docked in someone's driveway. If I jump out of that, I'll die. Concrete. In the hot tub though. In the hot tub, yeah. Subscribed, yeah. But yeah, can you fucking bully, like... Shattered. Especially now I've seen the tub, yeah. Subscribed, yeah. But yeah, can you fucking bullet, like.

Shattered, especially now I've seen the price, fuck. Oh, the price isn't part of it. I know, but like, but it is a bit because that would have refunded it. Well, that's literally why I was like, I'll order a few and keep one. All right, you've had a bit of a loss there. I've got to love to see it here.

And cause I feel like last week when we did the are you cool quiz, like you felt a bit added and we all felt a bit added. So I would like to turn the tables because Tony is back in fashion. Today is actually Tony's day. Butter chicken on stuff is cool. That feels oddly specific. In 2025, nighties are in and people who wear nighties are cool. Sabrina Carpenter, nightie wearer. Kaya Gerber, nightie wearer. Daisy Edgar Jones, nighties. The searches for night dresses are up 21% from 2024 to 2025.

And the company that made the nightie that's in too much on Netflix, which is a new show, has gone up 90% in sales and it's the moment. But guess what? What? Tony Lodge, cool girl, has been wearing a nightie before they were cool. And she didn't give a fuck.

She just wore it because it felt right. And now society's trying to keep up with her. So my love to see it is that my best friend is fucking cool. That's really nice. I love to see that too. Yep. That's my love to see it. And I love wearing 90s. 90s are in.

90s are in. That's awesome. Oh, well, I don't really want to go second now. I've got a love to see here. Katie Jenkins shared this into our Facebook group. Jenko! And it is our favorite slang terms for penis over the last, you know, like period of time.

So the first one starts 1602. The slang term for penis then was kikiwiki. There's quite a few here. 1720 was the silent flute. My favorite though is that- Do you like to play the silent flute? In night, I do, I'm very good. Although doing this feels weird, doesn't it?

Yeah. Not silent. Oh, sorry. My favorite though, I reckon is from 1935. The slang term for penis in 1935 was kidney buster. Oh my God. Isn't that fucking brutal? That's fucked up.

In 1888, it was the liver disturb. No. Hey, when have you been on the internet and something wasn't true? Come on. Maybe the kidney buster. Was that during war times? Oh yeah.

Everything just had to be described as a weapon. But in 19- They've got helicopters. Well, we've got liver busters. 1975, it was the corned beef torpedo. That's fucked up. Bit of mustard on there. You know what I'm saying?

Hey, Tony, how about- I don't like silverside, eh? Yeah. How about if someone said, I'll come around and give you the corned beef tornado. It sounds like a beef roll and you'd be like, fuck yeah, give me three. Yeah, I'd be like, yummy. Bring some friends. Yeah, yeah, let's have a BBQ.

Okay. Yeah, I think that sounds pretty good. But it just, I thought, you know what? I love to see that. I do love to see that. Yeah. Can I do an extra one from Samantha? Cause Samantha Peterson has said, I've got? I love to see that. I do love to see that. Yeah. Can I do an extra one from Samantha? Cause Samantha Peterson has said,

I've got to be able to see it. Do you want to just save it for tomorrow? No. Okay. Cause it's that good. After fucking 15 months after we went to the Webby's, our actual Webby turned up the other day. It's turned up and we had a little video

about when it arrived. I don't know if you've seen this in the Facebook group, but so, do you know what I'm talking about, Giles? Sorry, I'm trying to, I just can't figure this out. Oh, Tony's trying to figure out how she can grab it in the, she's holding it in the screen. That's alright. It took a while, sorry. Okay, So do you remember what sound you made when it actually arrived in the post? Close you kind of went oh So anyway Charles makes a little video it goes into patreon and patrons like shout out to Charles

showed up Charles and the auto captions tried to caption you going And have a look what I've just texted you and we'll pop even remember the video. As in, like, I don't remember making that noise. There's about 17 rows of Es and then it just ends with a oh no. Oh no. Yeah.

Did I really E for that long, Charles? I think the oh no might've been Lily when she goes, is it actually springy? And then nearly ripped the thing out of the fucking socket. Oh yeah. That's what she's, we call her the destroyer. We call her the destroyer. We call her the corned beef tornado.

We called Charles the kidney disturb. Charles was at my place yesterday. So I've had a second serving. Charles was there and my boyfriend was also at home. Was it awkward? It was. Was it tense? It was, yeah. Cause I think Charles was like, oh, I thought this was something else.

And Tord's like, oh, this is the guy running my marriage. When Tord's actually answered the door, and like it wasn't even Tony answering the door, it was like, oh. Did you think about leaving? So I'll go, I'll just come back tomorrow. Because it's still your turn.. Because it's still your turn. No, it's still your turn.

Okay. I do love silverside. I feel like that's one of those things though. Like my mom used to make it. And like, you know, you like boil it in the vinegar. Like you boil it in the vinegar and then you put the potatoes and stuff in there. And then she'd make like a cheesy mustard sauce. If I can have some of your cheesy mustard sauce.

Okay man. Alright. Oh my god. I can't say anything these days. How many staff members are you gonna take a slice of beef off today? Okay. of beef off today. Oh, me saying about your cheesy mustard sauce was like a zero compared to that. I think I'm just laughing out because I've just realized between Torbz and Charles, I'm not even in your top two anymore. Yes you are. Am I?

Yeah. Torbz is number one, obviously. That's fair. You know. Torbz is number one. I'll take that. Yeah, that's fair. Tomorrow on the show.

You could be two from the front and... I'll give you two on the front. We have to stop legally. Yeah, tomorrow, of all the things to give a fuck about, is back. Of all the things you gave a fuck about, that's the thing you gave a fuck about. Your brain could have gone a different route,

but that's the thing you gave a fuck about. I've been singing that in my house, like, nonstop. Yeah, I think we all have. I think we all have. And I'm not gonna mention it tomorrow until it happens, but I have one of the things someone gives a fuck about. I've written in advance my response and it is the best thing I've ever written in my life. Okay.

It is the height of comedy. Okay. Love it. Chapter. Reheard. Gold Coast. Subscribe. And I might just... You know there's something nice about going out on top? No, don't look at me like that. No. Okay. See you tomorrow. Love you. Bye. See you later.