Toni and Ryan - Whose LION is it anyway?

Episode Date: March 20, 2024

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Welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast. My name is Ryan. This is Dr. Author Tony Lodge. Welcome. And we are calling Michael, who is in California. So Michael's a hot girl? I believe so. I believe that is. Debbie is the rose. Hello. Michael! How you doing? It's Tony and Ryan.

Hey, I'm good. How are you guys? We're good, Michael. Are the rumors true? Are you a hot girl? I might have to plead the fifth. Yes. He's modest. Does that mean yes? It means fucking oath that he's modest. On my fucking oath. Michael, will you approve today's episode?

I absolutely will approve today's episode. A hot girl approving the episode my dreams are coming true make it a good one hey it's Mike from California and I approve this podcast alright coming up today.

Yes. Guys, I've travelled back to 1994. Oh, what was it like? I was one. I read a news... Did you meet my mum? I didn't see her there. She's dead in the past as well.

Good. Well, I was more getting to the point that I've read a newspaper and, guys, I don't know if you know what's going on in newspaper world but they've fucking lost the plot. I'm going to read you a few headlines from this newspaper and I think we'll all agree that it's over. So you bought a newspaper? No, no, no.

Or were you in a doctor's surgery and they had some sitting out? No, I was in a cafe and sometimes we've got a few papers sitting around. Yes. So I was having to flick through and when you, I'm going to read you a headline later and you, Tony, and you listening, you're all going to spit. So I'm going to have to ask you to not like take a sip of your coffee when I get there.

So why would they put it in a cafe? You're sitting there enjoying your coffee and you've got to buy another one. Maybe that's how they get you. That's how they get you. That's how they get you. It's big cafe. A newspaper. They're working together. It's an oligopoly.

No, I've already ate. Thanks. That was really funny and I deserve more and that's okay. Okay. I agree. Thanks. I'm still just trying to finish my oligopoly word, which is used not only in the wrong place,

but pronounced terribly. It's opportunity cost. Normal or not. So I'm studying economics and Tony just loves studying economics. I'm just really, I'm trying to, you know when you're trying to like get on someone's level? Yeah. So I'm like, what do I know about the economy?

Oh, supply and demand. Yeah. Oh, pfft. And that's it. Yeah. What else is there? Got an exam next week and that's it. I'm just going to walk in and write supply and demand

and just hand the piece of paper back. I would. I think you'll pass. Do you reckon that'll get a mark? Because like out of 100, you go, oh, I'll give you two marks for that. My mum always used to say, make sure you write your name on the top and that's one mark done. I'm like, mum, I don't think that they mark you for knowing your name.

I don't think they do. Not at this level of tertiary education. One time I got 0% in a maths test in high school and when I wrote Ryan Dunn, D-U-N-N, the two Ns actually like touched a little bit. So not only did I get 0%, I actually wrote Ryan Dumb by mistake just to rub it in. You hate to call yourself out, don't you?

Yeah, because you know how they like give you your paperback so you can see? And so there was just like red, red, red, red, red. And then someone – he circled my name and I was like – He's like, what have you done there? Yeah, he's really how they like give you your paperback so you can see and so there's just like red, red, red, red, red and then someone, he circled my name and I was like, what have you done there? Yeah, he's really just rubbed it in. He go, no, this is someone else's. My name's Ryan Dunn.

Oh, yeah. You're talking about that dumb. Oh, you're talking about that other guy. Yeah. Normal or nah, thanks for submitting these, by the way. You can do it at tonyandryan.com.au or in the Tony and Ryan podcast Facebook group. Anonymous Avocado Eater asks. Anonymous Avocado Eater asks,

Anonymous Avocado Eater? Is it normal to de-seed an avocado by just shoving your hand in and just grabbing the seed out? I used to stab at it with a knife, but I just kept cutting myself. I'm old enough to have accepted that I'm too clumsy for that. Now I just grab at it, but my husband thinks I'm a psycho. Am I normal or nah? Ryan, did you submit this?

This sounds 100% like something that you would do. Good question. Valid question. I'll accept. I won't be offended by the question. I am not good with a knife. I think what I do with the avocado yeah instead of like i just like fucking whack it with the knife yeah because then it sticks in and then

kind of yeah that's what you're supposed to do it sounds like um whoever's written this anonymous avocado eater um a a e has um is saying like i used to stab at it so if this is the avocado and the seed would be here it sounds like they're're doing this when you have to do that. Yeah. And then when you pull the, you give it a little squeak and then you pull the knife out and it's attached to the knife and then you can just like pop it off the knife. This isn't a dig.

This is a compliment. Can you let me know on the episode thread if even though you only heard what Tony was saying, when you heard her go, instead of doing this, you have to do that, I reckon everyone went, I know exactly what you mean. Thank you. And I do take that as a compliment. I reckon everyone's going, yep, can't see what you're doing?

Yep. 100% get it. But when you're watching the video, though, let me know that you still knew. It's not submitted by me because I would never deseed an avocado with my hands. I've done some fuck stuff. We know I've done some fuck stuff.

I wouldn't do that because they're too slippery. You wiped your ass with a towel. And you've never done anything. That's true. Because nothing's ever happened on a valid day of bringing shit up. It's true. Don't say bring your shit up. What I will say is that the seed is too slippery.

Need a towel. You couldn't, I don't think you could de-seed it by grabbing it. Not without fucking the whole avocado. Yeah, or wearing like gloves that have like a coarse. Oh, yeah, like a chain mail glove that you use for cutting fish. Yeah, this is for my fish and avocado seeds. You know, back in the day when like plastic cutting boards first became a thing and they had the little symbol like this is for vegetables,

this is for chicken, this is for fish. You just got one knife and one glove. It's like my avocado and fish set. Yeah, when I'm doing a little ceviche and wasabi number. That actually sounds delicious. It actually does. Nah, just to confirm. Oh, nah.

Yeah. Sorry, I forgot what we were doing. Blacked out. Megan Haggett. It might be Megan. M. Haggett. Megan, Megan. That's funny.

Megan says, normal or nah, wearing your high school leavers jumper after you graduated. My girlfriend thinks it's okay for people to wear them 10 years after as it makes it vintage, but I think it's cringy. Okay. I've got a little bit of a formula here. Okay. I think it's fine the year that you graduate.

Yep. I think it's fine for the first two months after you graduate. Then after that, you can only wear it at home until you hit the 10-year mark and it's like cool again. We're back on. Yeah. So between. I actually think that there is a very strict timeline, yeah.

But if you graduated last year, no, babe. No. What about, so there was, you remember when I like blew up Melbourne Business School on LinkedIn about not getting a hoodie? A jumper, yeah. Yeah, and then they like. But that was just their branded hoodie. That wasn't a, are Leavers jackets everywhere?

So I think it's just like a hoodie, your final year, it kind of is like, you know, your class of 05. And it's got like, sometimes it has like all the names on the back of it or whatever. I think ours had the names and then like you have your own nickname on the bottom sometimes. Yeah, and your nickname's on the bottom or whatever. So it's like your names and then like you have your own nickname on the bottom sometimes. Yeah, and your nickname's on the bottom or whatever. So it's like your seniors only kind of.

Yeah. Yeah. Do you still have yours? I don't. I don't think. Ours you can put nicknames on it and I just had Dunn or Dunny or something because that's what I was called. And then Dave, for some reason, Dave Parsons had Goon Bandit.

Goon Bandit? Yeah, he's just like on the day of filling out the forms, he was like, oh, that's sort of funny. Like if someone goes, oh, someone sold a goon on the weekend, a little goon bandit, Dave was like filling out the form, he goes, oh, it's got a bit of a ring to it. That's really funny. Write that down and then the jumper.

Only Dave Parsons could get away with that. So this happens in like February. And then you don't get the jumper until fucking November. Oh, the day before. Like it took all year to get these fucking jumpers. And they're so expensive. Like you have to pay for them and stuff, yeah. But then basically like, oh, done.

Oh, Ryan, there's yours. Yep, Katie, Katie, there's yours. Marley, Marley, there's yours. Goon bandit. And Dave goes, oh, fuck, I think that was me. Yeah, I think I wrote that down. Yeah, he's waiting for his one. And then it just says goon bandit. He goes, oh, no, that sort of rings that down. Yeah, he was waiting for his one and then it just says Goomba

and he goes, oh, no, that sort of rings a bell. And then he took it. His mum hated it. I'm not surprised. It was a big moment though, like getting your Leavers jacket. It's a big moment. But then, okay, specific in Australia, it comes in November, the day before school finishes.

So what's the fucking point? Anyway, it's also the start of summer, so it's hot as fuck, so you don't need to wear a jumper. So we literally spent all year waiting for a jumper and no one wore it a single time. And it was like at my school there was like a big fuck up at the printing embroidery place or whatever, and they screwed up everyone's names.

Like my friend Zoe, instead of Z-O-E, it came Z-O-W. Like there was just typos on all of them. Did I do it? And so all of the jumpers had to be sent back and we had to wait like another two months for them all to, like it was so ridiculous. Why don't they organise that in year 11 so that you've got it for the first day of year 12? That is a great idea.

Why don't they do that? Last week of year 11, put your names in, goon bandits aside, and then when you rock up for your first day of year 12, it's ready to roll. You can pick it up and you can wear it. You can wear it all year. And then if anybody, like, joins in year 12, like, they could get theirs but they just wait or whatever.

Yeah, that's fine. Get a few spares. That's fine, yeah. Get a few spares. You know what I mean? Yeah. You're smart. Yeah.

I'll have a chat with your mum. She's a principal. Yeah. So I'll put that idea forward. Okay. So with the knife, you can't do this. You have to do this. Yeah.

Mitchell Clark is a grown man. Good on him. Every day I go to work with my lunchbox and my pencil case and my co-workers tease me mercilessly. But I save money on lunch and I hate other people stealing my stationery. Normal. I pay that. Yeah.

I pay that. I bring my lunch to work every day. Yep. I bring a green smoothie and I bring like a sandwich or something. And what happens if someone asks to borrow any of your stuff? I give it happily and I say, here you go. Please enjoy. I've, here you go. Please enjoy. I've fucking heard it all.

I've heard it all. Do you know what? There actually was a time when I said, please enjoy using this until I never got fucking anything back. Here we go. And actually back when we used to share an office, not naming any names and it would be impossible for anyone to figure out what I'm talking about.

It wasn't ever stationary. It was like computer cables. Cables and chargers. I lost like 18 fucking phone chargers at that place. Yeah. So I think the rent where we used to be at Producey with Dil Buckley and crew was I think, which I think is every week you pay rent and you give them three charges.

Yeah, that was like the trade-off. It was like a deal. And then we get to use the space and have an office, which was a great deal. But over 18 months, that's what? It's really added up. 78 charges. Yeah, it's really fucking added up.

Yeah. Yeah, so my phone's dead so everyone's got a charge I can borrow. Well, normal or nah, buying a label maker to put your name on charges so they're not borrowed by other people in the workplace. You know what? I'm backing this in. Fucking normal. And I stand by that and I've always said that.

Yeah. As soon as I read this normal or nah from Mitchell Clarke, I went, well, I know someone who's going to be on your side. Did you think I'd go as hard on the lunchbox though? No, but I backed in for the pencil case. Yeah, nice. Yeah, I'll take both. No, but you are pro lunchbox and I think I said on the pod last week

how proud I am that you're coming in with your smoothie. Yeah. It's breakfast and then you've got your lunch made. Yeah. And when I come in with a shit breakfast and awful coffees and then I'll go, oh, must be almost lunchtime. Yeah. Pull out Uber Eats and you're just being consistent and getting it done.

There is a place around the corner that Ryan found the other day and they do like a croque monsieur toasted sandwich, like the bechamel and the ham and cheese and stuff, and Matt's got my fucking name all over it one day this week. I'll put my label maker on it. Hey, it's Mike from California and you're listening to Tony and Ryan. A massive shout out to a few of our champion tapas over at our Patreon. All of the details for our Patreon are in our show notes.

And it's Thursday today, tomorrow night, so Friday, we're doing a little live stream from my place. We are. Very exciting stuff for Champion Tapa. So if you'd like to watch that, make sure you join today so that you can join us. Have we announced the theme? I don't want to cut our own grass. No, no, it's fine.

It's Moe, Moe and Moe. Yeah. So a few weeks ago on the show show we talked about the Moe oyster, which is half a dimmer in soy sauce on the BBQ. Sorry, half a dimmer. And I said, wouldn't it be good if we had a Moe and a Moe? So we're going to get some really nice champagne, some Moet and Chandon, and we're going to fucking pop a dimmer

on the BBQ and I actually can't fucking wait. And you know what? The thing is crazy is that once the cameras get turned off, we aren't going to go, oh, okay. Can I stay the night? I'm literally like, are you guys getting Ubers to my house because there's no way you can drive home after the mowie and mowie. I'm going to have to get Torbs to fucking do a taxi service,

drive all you guys home. No, I think I might bring Mabel and the port-a-cot and just settle right in. We'll put P I might bring Mabel and the port-a-cot. Yep. And just settle right in. We'll put Pippa and Mabes in the cot together. They'll have a little snag. We could pop them in the spa. Bring your bathers.

We'll have a hot tub. Is that socially unacceptable for a boss to ask people to bring their bathers to their house? Is that weird? No. I'm HR, so I can say whatever I want. First of all, jokes aside, Tony actually is HR. I am HR.

You're welcome. Which is fucking problematic. I have to add that to my LinkedIn. Your LinkedIn's getting busy. Because I just added bird in charge. Yeah. Which is an inside joke for those on Patreon. What's more inappropriate?

See, bring bathers sounds weird. Yeah. But what's weirder is you go, oh, I'm going to have a spa. Don't worry about your bathers. You know what I mean? So in that context, bathers, yes. Yeah, actually, yeah, that's a really good point because imagine if I just didn't say anything right and then when you're over,

I go, should we have a spa? Oh, no, bathers. That's okay. That's all good. But I knew the whole time that I was going to bring the spa up. Anyway, so a few of the people that hopefully will be joining us for our live stream tomorrow night. Bring your bathers.

Oh, Diggity. Good on you, mate. Sean Houlihan. Oh, I hope you had a great St. Patrick's Day last week. Sounds very Irish. Taylor T. Good on you, mate. Shona Dixon and Victoria Rizzi.

Well, I'll be Shona my Dixon in the hot tub. Because you've got Victoria Rizzi. That's right. Yeah, that's right. That's right. Thank you so much, guys. Hopefully we'll see you tomorrow night. I want to send a shout out to Samantha who is a tapper.

Hi, Samantha. And she said. Samantha? I hardly know her. I do hardly know her. She got a surprise from her partner because her partner knows that Samantha loves the Tony and Ryan podcast. So her partner went to TonyandRyan.com.au

and bought her a hoodie without her knowing. Oh, that's a good surprise. Yeah, and surprised her with it and she sent that through as well. So TonyandRyan.com.au as Tony sips from her Tony and Ryan hot girl iced coffee tumbler. And I hate to, I know that we've got something we've got to get to, the newspaper, but James, our video guy, he's come decked out today. He's got his coffee in a Tony and Ryan tumbler

and he's got his tarp jumper on as well. He is drinking the- Like, you are not getting a pay rise. I'm so sorry, mate. It's not going to work. He's drinking the Kool-Aid. Yeah. They charged me full price.

Yeah. And shipping. Yeah, and shipping. The fucking Australia box. I sit on a desk four centimetres from you. Yeah, that'll be at $9.95, sweetheart. We've got 900 boxes in our office of all the merch, but we charged him shipping.

It took nine weeks to get there with Australia Post. Yeah, trusted brand my fucking ass. Okay. Top ten. Newspaper. Here we go. What's your first reaction to this headline? Everyone, I just want you to feel it in your heart and your soul

and probably the bottom of your sphincter. Ooh. Eight-year-old girl becomes world's youngest homeowner after buying her first property. I've seen this. I also travelled back with you to 1994 and read the newspaper. This article has been doing the rounds this week. I saw it and I, to be honest, I don't click on this shit anymore

because every time it's like, oh, 19-year-old part-time McDonald's employee buys first house. Wow, how good is it to be on the property ladder? And then they're like, you too can do it. And then you read the article and it's like, yeah, so i saved two dollars a week and my granddad gave me half a million dollars yeah and if i can do it then anyone can do it um i'm like fucking love it like if i had a granddad that gave me half a million dollars like i'd be fucking buying a hundred houses yeah that's not how that works but you know what i mean like like it's actually no shade to people that

get an inheritance or get like their parents help whatever i actually i love that for you and if my parents were alive i'm sure that they would help me as well um so i don't click on this shit anymore because it just makes me angry because it's like anybody can do it and i'm like yeah your parents did like yeah you know you ate but Was she selling lemonade for like 900 bucks a cup? Like, is she a gymnastics hero? Is it Simone Biles? Do you think Simone Biles is eight years old? I think she is.

Yeah. She's still got about four or five Olympics to go. Yeah, she does. She's had a good innings and she's got a few ahead as well. What is it with news organisations? This is what I imagine news organisations. Say we're at the Daily Mail. Yeah.

And they go, oh. Hey, I'll look and see. That other company, just other newspaper, they've got an article about a 10-year-old buying a property. You know what we need? An eight-year-old. Yeah. That'll show them.

Yeah, yeah. Oh, everyone will be buying our paper. And then the other company goes, fuck, they've got an eight-yearyear-old does anyone have a seven-year-old they can lend a house has anyone met a newborn baby that's bought a house um do you this is my reaction okay yeah i know i've done the reading mate and it's fucking worse than you've imagined okay give me your reaction first no but this is my reaction when i just read that headline i just went give me a fucking spell i'm done i'm actually done with these articles as well and like we've peaked what's a spell like a witch like a break

oh give me a fucking witch yeah why it's a movie to your house you've got a lovely house mate the child saved two thousand dollars out of her pocket money that her dad gave her for doing chores and he chipped in the other $617,000. Oh, there it is. You know, fuck. Give it a fucking rest. $2,000. She spent the other 10 on a new Lexus.

What are you talking about? $2,000 in pocket money. My mum used to give me five cents that she found on the road. She'd go, that'll do. Yeah, if you can be bothered picking that up, Tones, it's yours. Yeah. And it would be like hard yard work all weekend as well. Like we used to have to fucking like dig trenches in the backyard and shit.

Did you ever have to do that as a kid? No, because I didn't grow up in a fucking. Chain gang, I know. And so literally it would be like, oh, yeah, we're going to repot all of the trees in the backyard. And it would be like hard yacker all weekend. Child slave labour. And then mum would be like, oh, a tree will make a stew for dinner.

I'm like, oh, goody. Just what I want after fucking working in the sun for two full fucking days. A huge hot wet thing. You're already a hot wet thing outside. Give me a fucking cold water and fuck off. Sorry, mum. Love you. R.I.P.

But honestly. No, this reminds me when I said, where did you buy Christmas trees when you were younger and you said, no, dad dragged us into the woods so we could cut down stuff illegally and then have to hock it back to town. Did you get a couple of extra trees and then like flip them? So that would, we didn't do that for Christmas trees. We did that for firewood. Oh, my mistake.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, because we had one artificial tree that we had until I was 18 years old and then the year that my mum got cancer, we were like, let's buy a really nice one. I was like, oh, it's going to last longer than her and it did. It did. Still going. Yeah, still going. Yeah.

Is it illegal just to go into a national park and hock down trees? I don't think we should talk about it because it definitely is, yeah. Okay, great. We never would. Different times. It was different times. It was different times. We're talking, you know, 20 years ago.

But, and there weren't laws 20 years ago. But we would never cut anything down. We would cut into things that had fallen. So natural causes. I love it that your dad's like, wait in the car, and then he comes back to the car 10 minutes later and goes, a couple of big ones have fallen over. A couple of big ones have fallen down.

Yeah, right next to that chainsaw. Yeah. And he's covered in wood. Anyway. Next article. And by the way. Sorry, but do we know how she got the $2,000? Yeah, pocket money for doing chores.

So her rich dad's gone, can you unsack the dishwasher? Great, here's two grand. I'll take that back and give you a house. He goes, you got changed for a $2,000 note. She goes, nah. Nah, I don't. He goes, can you cut a check? She's like, nah, babe.

And he goes, fucking hell, okay. Give you the whole lot. Do you want to know a fun backstory to it yeah the guy wrote a book four years ago called my four-year-old property investor yeah and then so he he's pushing his kid out in front of the news and then he's like oh by the way like buy my book and i'm the ceo of property investing oh so it's a marketing ploy so he's actually going to be able to claim this house on tax. He's like, oh, no, no, that was marketing material,

that house that my daughter lives in. Did she move in by herself? Like she goes there for dinner. Do you want to come in for dinner? Yeah. I'll cook. Yeah, she's got an easy bake oven. They have raw dough for dinner because that's all chicken man is

and a fucking mud pie. She's got an easy bake oven. They have raw dough for dinner because that's all chicken mani. And a fucking mud pie. Did you make mud pies? The more I learn about your childhood, the grimmer it sounds. Child labour, mud pies. The wood from the forest. Artificial Christmas tree. Yeah, nah, all good.

Next article. Not that we fucking need one. You can read about my childhood in my book. I don't need one. Yeah, as soon as we mentioned he was an author, you're like, oh, nah, but, you know, authors. Oh, my, yeah, we've got to do what we've got to do. Hard to sell books these days, yeah. 8% of men think they could take a lion in a fist fight.

Is the headline. Over 1,000 people took part in a YouGov survey and 8% of them were like, yeah, no, I reckon I could fucking, if it came down to it. I'm throwing you under the bus a little bit here, but this is very reminiscent of the, no, no, no, not because of that, but do you remember? Into a bus or a lion? No, no, no, no, no, no.

Do you remember the start of men that thought that they could beat? Was it Venus Williams in a tennis match? Serena Williams. Yeah, and she fucking smashed them. Yeah, no, no, no. But it was like, do you think that you could beat her in a tennis match? And all these guys were like, yep. Have you ever played tennis?

She's like the world negative five. She's that high up. Yeah, that high up. There's just no fucking way. A lion in a fist fight. Like if they had to fight a lion. Let's all just assume that. Nah, I can't.

Fucking hell. I've got an idea. No, we're not doing this. Let's get a lion. As a species, I think we need natural selection to do its thing. That's a great point. Pop them in the ring. If the 8% reckon they can take them, then let's find out.

Let's find out. Do it. Yes. Don't just say you can take them. Do it. Show us. Yeah. And then bump the rest of us up a little bit.

Fucking raise our average. And let the pyramid, what's the food chain? The food pyramid. Fuck, I haven't heard about the food pyramid since grade three. The food pyramid. Do you remember the food pyramid? It's got little calves on the bottom. No, I know.

Little streets at the top. I saw them. I'd hate to see my real pyramid now. Oh, mine's flipped. Yeah. I saw this thing the other day and it was like, it's a food pyramid, but they only show you one side, so I wonder what's on the rest of it. Because it's like what's on the other side?

Oh, no. That's Uber Eats on one side. Yeah, pyramids are 3D. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So where's the rest of the fucking food? Tutan, come on. Okay. Sorry.

Do you think you could take a lion, Toni? Absolutely not. Couldn't take a lion down. No, I couldn't. There's no way. I also like a lion. I think that people are misjudging how big a lion is. They're real big.

You wouldn't even have a height advantage. It's huge. I think most people overestimate. And they don't all sing. You know what I mean? Like are people just watching? I don't think any of them sing. No, but are you just watching The Lion King? People have watched The Lion King

and they're like, oh, it's fine. I could take that. Like the hyenas and everything. I don't think that you could. Have you seen The Lion King? No, I haven't. You know a lot about it considering you've never seen it. No, I just know that they sing and I know that there's hyenas because Whoopi Goldberg voices one of them, which I think is so funny.

Like, what else? Did they not have the view then? Do you know what I mean? She's busy. So, do you want to voice this? I'm busy between 11am and midday. Yeah, and they go, fuck, could you come in at one? And she goes, alright. I could. I haven't done a movie for 15 years, so I reckon I could do that. Have you seen the movie

Jumpin' Jack Flash? It's got Whoopi Goldberg in it. It's quite scary. We had it on DVD. Is Sister Act a horror? No. What is it? It's a delightful film. I haven't seen that either, but I know the music.

Joyful, joyful Lord, we adore thee. God of glory, Lord of light. I've got a normal on R. Anyway. Oh, yeah. Okay. What's normal on R? Knowing the movie's soundtrack without having seen the movie.

Normal. 100% normal. I know most of the music from The Lion King, but I don't know the film. Yeah. I know the music from Sister Act. I haven't seen the film. You have seen Kung Fu Panda.

I have seen Kung Fu Panda, the original. I haven't watched the other three, though, unfortunately. I have to put those on my list. Exactly right. So is Christmas. For those who- A bit of chaotic energy in this episode today. Yeah, for those of you that are new to the pod,

every Easter Tony battens down the hatches. I do. And doesn't leave the house and only watches movies. Yeah. Could the Kung Fu Panda- That. What's after a trilogy quad quadrille what'd you say before quadrilleopoly no i already ate

i've just got black spots in my eyes. I just laugh so hard. I'm my own fucking shit joke. Do you want to do your love to see it first or second? Yeah, I have to. Oh, no. Oh, shit. Oh, I've got a you love to see it you're going to hate.

I think this is really good, but Dylan Vanderloo sent this to us in Patreon. We check all the DMs in there. Is that Dylan Friends? No. Dylan Vanderloo. Dylan Vanderloo? No, I went before. Hey, Tony and Ryan, I've got some February 29 coincidence chat.

Is that allowed? It is allowed because this is really good. Obviously, he's listened to the episodes from when we talked about like, um, coincidence chat, but also we talked about, you know, February 29 and how crazy it is that you're born that day. I think it's actually really good, which is why I find out someone's bragging about marrying a nine year old again. I'm going to fucking lose it.

Well, they're a homeowner though. So that's pretty good. Maybe that's how the eight-year-old bought a house. That must be. Yeah. Okay. It all makes sense. Yeah, it all makes sense.

I've got some February 29 coincidence chat, says Dylan. My grandparents on my mum's side are both born the 29th of Feb, so they're married to each other, but they were born the same year, same day, same hospital, like a couple of hours apart. They weren't twins, were they? No, a couple of hours apart. That's like a couple of minutes, I think. Anyway.

Is it? How far apart are twins born? Normally like, yeah, three to seven minutes apart. Did you just make up those numbers? No, no, no. That's very specific. No, no, no. Normally it's like quite quick.

Anyway, so they were born same year, same day, same hospital on the 29th of Feb. When they turned 72, they turned 18. They went and had a beer. And so, well, Dylan's mum got them on the news in Adelaide, not Adelaide, hang on, as Adelaide's oldest teenagers and the segment had them like legally buying alcohol and like, you know, buying a lotto ticket and stuff like all that stuff.

I will pay that. That is good. Isn't that so good? Yeah. So you love to see that. I think that was a really fucking sweet story. You do love to see that. Yeah.

My love to see it is a bit of a wild card. Oh. Because I was thinking about fighting a lion. Yeah. It reminded me of this movie called The Ghost in the Darkness. Have you seen that? No, I'm Googling now. It's got Michael Douglas and Val Kilmer.

Michael Douglas though. Val Kilmer back in the day. Michael Douglas. What's the film I watched the other day with him and it's him and Brittany Murphy and they're trying to work out a cryptic clue. Oh, Eight Mile. Oh, Just Mar. Oh, just married. So, The Ghost in the Darkness, I think when I was seven or eight,

I must have got it on like VHS. American historical adventure film. Yeah, right. So, they're in Kenya and basically they're building this train line. It's set in like the 1800s. But they're these like man-eating lions that are just like taken out the railway. Because these two of them, it's based on a true 1800s, but they're these like man-eating lions that are just like taken out the railway, because these two of them, they're based on a true story.

So hang on, Michael Douglas voices a lion? It's real. No, so he's like in the army. Oh! I thought they were the lions. Val Kilmer and Michael Douglas voice a lion. No, they're real lions. So is it a cartoon? No.

But they voice the animals. Like in the movie Cats and Dogs. It's real animals but they're voiced by people because they couldn't voice themselves. Based on a true story. It's like the film Madagascar. Animals don't talk. Oh, okay. See, this is where you've gotten me.

All right, yeah. So the animals don't talk. And Michael Douglas is a person. And Val Kilmer are both like. They're people. Yeah, they're playing people. Batman. In the army. And Val Kilmer are both like. They're people. Yeah. They're playing people. Batman.

In the army. Well, this was just after Batman, actually. So he's a bat in the film. No, he's a regular guy who works in the army who's been assigned to kill the lions because they're stopping the train. Kilmer. Hardly know him. So apparently.

So the lions are driving the trains. What is happening to them? So I watched this movie when I was seven or eight. The Hat. So it is a kid's film. No. Oh. It's not a kid's film.

It's a horror film. It's scary. Where was your mum at work? Yeah. Oh, she left by then. It's scary. Where was your mum? At work.

Yeah. Oh, she left by then. Being abandoned does have its downsides, but one of the upsides is watching PG-13 plus movies way earlier than you're supposed to. So when you're seven or eight, you're like, this is the craziest, scariest thing ever. A hundred percent. But it turns out like, and I haven't watched it since then,

so I just remember it being this like amazing movie because everything's kind of amazing when you're seven or eight because you've only got like six other films to compare it to yeah so i hadn't thought about this movie until i was thinking about taking on a line yeah and so then i went oh fuck that movie yeah so i looked it up and it turns out it's actually one of the worst movies ever made in like history is it one one of those movies, like The Room? How it's like so bad that it's good? It's got like a cult following. Let me read these reviews. And it's funny you said that.

Roger Ebert, who's the famous film critic from Chicago. Some movies can be so bad it's funny, but this movie wasn't good enough for that. The special effects, this is another review. The special effects were so terrible and out of control because there's maybe like a bit of CGI to make the lions do what they needed it to do. Well, you told me that they were real lions, but okay, yep.

Well, they were real because they were from the zoo in Canada that they use and it's the same lion in another movie. He's like a showbiz lion. Whose lion is it anyway? It's the Canadian zoo's. Sorry. The special effects are totally... Drew Carey owns a lion, takes it to work with him. Yeah.

Did you know I own a tiger? Do you? No, I don't. I'm lying. The special effects were so terrible and out of control, it made the animated Tarzan cartoons feel subtle and realistic that's very funny the director said after the final edit was rendered i never looked at the movie or the poster or anything to do with it ever again because i knew already it was such a fucking

mess guys ghost in the darkness go and check it out this weekend oh god i feel like i have to watch it again now because i remember it being so good. I think you do have to watch it again. So that's the name. One's the Ghost and the – so the two of them are known as the Ghost and the Darkness. Oh, so it's like a bad cop film. Like the two cops, that's their catchphrase.

Oh, the Ghost, the Darkness, you know, and they're back to back like this. It's really not a slapstick. It's people getting mauled by lions in Kenya. No, I don't think it's slapstick, but you know those like old. Yeah, but they're not like killed him. No, no, no, but they're like. Yeah, no, they're not posing. Feel the ghost.

It's not Starsky. You're thinking of Starsky and Hutch. No, I'm actually thinking of Mac and Cheese, which is the show that is made in the TV show Friends and then two cops and they're called Mac and Cheese. Anyway, okay, well, go check that out. You can do that or watch our live stream tomorrow night. You have to do one or the other.

One or the other. Your choice. They're the choicest. Tomorrow on the show, a tarpa has a sugar daddy who's propositioned her and she says, I don't know what to do and I want some advice. So all of us are going to give our advice. Oh.

What's the sugar? They're called sugar baby, right? Yeah. Sugar baby slash tarpa needs some help from all of us. Sugar smarpa. Sugar tarpa. Sugar tarpa. Yeah.

All right. Tomorrow on the show. Love you, bye.