Toni and Ryan - Working with Dizzee Rascal

Episode Date: February 20, 2022

We try and strike a celebrity deal, a Bagel faux pas and your pork sword feedback. Love ya! T x Check out our Patreon at patreon.com/ToniandRyan, and make sure you join our Facebook Group! Find #ToniAndRyan on Instagram @tonilodge and @ryan.jon OR on TikTok @toni.lodge and @ryanjondunn Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello? Is this Stockton? Yes, it is. Is this Tony and Ryan? Yes. It is. We're wondering if you would approve this podcast. Of course I would.

Yeah! Woo! It is. We're wondering if you would approve this podcast. Of course I would. Yeah. Woo. Hey, this is Stockton from Colorado and I approve this podcast. Welcome to the Tony and Ryan podcast. Welcome. Happy Monday. Happy Monday. Happy Monday.

And can we make a confession? This is my confession. One of us is hungover. And it's both of us. Which one? Both. We were fun mums last night. Not together?

Not together, no. That's tonight. Independently. Independently. Yeah, I'm actually excited about tonight. What's the vibe? Do I have to, like, look cute or is it, like, look like a sloth? Look like a sloth. Yes.

A few people coming around tonight for Bridget's birthday. Tony and Torbs are some of them. I'm so excited. Yeah. Because the same thing happened last night. I was supposed to go out for dinner with a girlfriend and then she messaged me. She was like, hey, dress cosy, let's stay in and have a cheese board

and a wine. How many cheese boards, how many wines? One massive cheese board, one massive wines. Plural. Quick question. Actually, before we get into today's episode, let me just tell you, you're about to learn a lot about Tony and Torb's business ventures. That's coming up soon.

Business ventures. And also last week after we talked about the pork sword, people from all around the world were, A, flabbergasted by the term pork sword, but people from all over have said this is what we call that piece of the body in our part of the world. Oh. So I don't know. Did we decide we're going to call it World Wide Wang?

Well, we both came up with some good names. Okay. Yeah. Well, that's coming up on today's episode. But yesterday I get tagged in a story by our local bagel place. I feel really bad about this. So I see this thing on Instagram and it's, is it Bizzle? Bizzle B.

Bizzle B. Bizzle B. Yeah. They go, oh, here's two bagels being prepared for Tony and Ryan. Yeah, Tony and Ryan, this is your breakfast kind of thing. And I was like, that's strange. I don't recall this. What happened? Well, so yesterday morning, so Friday morning,

it had been a long as fuck week, like a massive week, and I just needed some love in my tummy yesterday morning. I was like, you know what, I need some naughty breakfast. So I ordered Torbs and I some bagels. So I start work now at 7am. I delay ordered them for 9am. Yep. And I ordered two of the Wall Street bagels.

Oh, that's fun. And that's your favourite as well. It is. And they know that because they're big fans of the podcast. They always share our reels and stuff. It's so great. And so what I think they've seen my name come up on the ticket and gone to Wall Street, that's got to be Tony and Ryan. They must be together. And then they tagged you and I then had to text you and say, mate, surprise, breakfast is not coming. I thought I was getting surprise breakfast. I know.

Because I would have as well. Because I would have been like, Ryan's sending breakfast. That is so fucking kind. And then I was like, I really don't want you to get excited that a bagel's coming when it isn't. Well, I was excited. And so I said to Torbs, oh, my God, how embarrassing. Should I order him breakfast and send it to work?

Yes. And he was like, nah. Oh. Yeah. I see. So you can talk to Torbs. So you and Torbs had bagels and they assumed it was for the two of us. Yeah, but.

I just want to put it out there. As much as I love spending time with you, we don't spend every single waking hour together. No, we don't. Which is a real shame. It is a shame. It is a shame. It is a shame. Yeah, it's a crying shame.

Yeah, and Biz will be have made that incorrect assumption. Yeah, but also they outed me. They did. Imagine if I was like cheating on my boyfriend or something, right, and I ordered breakfast and they're like, oh, we love Tony. She's fucking, and then Torbs messaged me. He's like, hey, bro. Who's the other one for?

Yeah. I think what would have been worse if you were single and you were like, oh, me and Ryan are having one each and they're just out of tune. They're both for me. So Christian Hull used to do that when he went to the Maccas drive-thru. Yeah. He always was like, oh, I think Matt wanted a cheeseburger. Oh, I've done it so many times.

I think Steve, yeah, he wanted the thick shake and I'll just a small fries for me because obviously watching myself. Yeah, or when you're shutting the door to the Uber Eats driver and you've obviously ordered like way too much food. Way too much, yeah. You're like, oh, when are Mel and John coming over? Yeah, we do that a lot, yeah. Every time I think of that, I think of that Christian Hull video.

I reckon I'll watch that once a week. It's so good. All right, question for the Tarpers. Question for Tony. Question. Have you ever tweeted at a celebrity? Have you ever tagged a celebrity in the Facebook comments or on Instagram or something?

People do it to you all the time, mate. You must be used to it. As soon as I open my mouth, I'm like, Tony's going to make a joke about this. I'm talking real celebrities. I've tagged you in one of those. What comedian do you want to reply to your comment? And you've replied to me before, which is a big deal.

I'd be very careful about how much shit you give me because you know where this story's going. Yeah, I do actually. And luckily, Torbs is about a week behind on the podcast. Great. So I've probably got a boyfriend for another week. Did the celebrity respond to you? Did they not?

They didn't. What were you tweeting? Now, Tony, the other day I mentioned that I liked the mashup of the song Dirty Love, which is Florence and the Machine and Dizzy Rascal. Yep. And you said to me, oh, I'm actually mates with Dizzy Rascal. We worked together on a project before.

That didn't happen. Is that what you said to me? No, that's absolutely not what happened. What happened is I said to you, oh, my God, I started laughing and you're like, what the fuck is going on? And I was like, oh, mate, strap yourself in. So why is it that you and Torbs, your boyfriend, know Dizzy Rascal? As I just searched for Torbs on Twitter.

Oh, here it is. Do you want me to read out the tweets or do you want to explain yourself? Read out the tweets. Okay. So this is your- So anyone that doesn't know, Dizzy Rascal, like the DJ. Oh, yeah, everyone knows Dizzy Rascal. Oh, but I'm just like-

Bonkers, are you joking? Some people think I'm bonkers. Yeah, I love Dizzy Rascal. How does these songs go? Some people think I'm bonkers, but I just think I'm free. That was good actually, yeah. Yeah, that's what he sounds like. Mate, I'm a big Dizzy Rascal fan or Fizzy Rascal. So on the 1st of July 2018, which was, by the way, Torb's, Toblerone, Torbenstein's last tweet that he sent. Yeah, yeah. He's tagged Dizzy Rascal and said,

Hello, Mr Rascal. And this is a thread, by the way, the next tweet. Dizzy? Dizzy, can I give you a call? Dizzy Rascal, have you ever wanted to be a movie star? At Dizzy Rascal, I've got an idea for you. You know how your name is Dizzy? Well, it's like that.

But you're on a skateboard or heel is your choice. Yeah, we wanted him to have creative control. And you, Dizzy, are an animated cola beverage named Fizzy Rascal. So you and Torbs are sitting there on Twitter one night, you've had a few drinks and you're like, let's pitch this idea on Twitter to Fizzy Rascal. Yeah, because I thought it was a really good idea. I thought it would be a great kids cartoon.

You know how Peaking Duck have the Peaking Duck book? Do they? They've got a kids book. Really? Yeah. And I was like, oh, wouldn't it be great if Dizzy Rascal was Fizzy Rascal and it was like a little animated TV series like teaching kids about soft drink. I agree.

First of all, that's hilarious. Thank you. I agree that when you're having a few drinks and you're talking shit with your friends, what a great funny conversation to have to hypothesise and go, oh, how funny would it be if it was Dizzy Rascal versus Fizzy Rascal? Where I would have drawn the line would be somewhere before tagging him in not one tweet but one, two, three, four.

I'm going to say Alex is trolling him. No, but it wasn't. It was sweet. It was like an idea. There's 15 tweets. He did not get back to us. Can you just, sorry, remind me of what date and time they were sent? 1st of July 2018.

Fuck. Yeah, okay. Does it have a time on there? Like time of day? Yeah. 10.47pm. Yeah, see, okay. Does it have a time on there? Like time of day? Yeah. 10.47pm. Yeah, see, okay. We're understanding the mindset at the time.

I think that's a really good idea and I want to know if people think, well. Someone's retweeted it. Who? Oh, me? It's liked by Tony Lodge. Okay, nice. And retweeted by someone who's not on Twitter anymore because it's so long ago.

Maybe it was Dizzy Rascal, a burner account. So did Dizzy get back to you? No, we're still yet to have a response. Maybe if anybody listening knows Dizzy Rascal, it's possible. Do you want to go again? Maybe it's a good re-pitch. But can I, let me just, before we get too far ahead of ourselves. Yep.

If we tell the Tafas to get tagging, they'll get tagging. They will. No, no, no. We don't need you to tag. But that's what I'm saying. Are you wanting to, I'm not going to use the word bully. No. But are you?

It's not bullying because it's a good idea. I think it's a business opportunity. Another thing I want you to consider is we provide this podcast, you know, for free. We enjoy doing it. People enjoy listening to it. We can't like how many times can we ask the tapas to do something for us? Like I don't want to take the piss.

So what I'm saying is if this is the one thing we're all in on, are you sure you want it to be this one thing? Oh, no, actually because I ate an ice cream when I was a kid and I really want to find out the name of it. So we'll save it for then. Don't do anything. No one do anything. So if we're doing an online campaign, you want it to be to figure out.

It's about the ice cream. And I'm not going to get into it right now. It sounds like it's vanilla. No. We're into it right now. It sounds like it's vanilla. No. No. We're saving it because the whole time I worked in radio, the whole time I've been doing a job like this, I've saved this. And I was like, I'm saving that until I know that I'm going

to actually fucking find out what the ice cream is. So no more information. You and I, Tony and Ryan, we're going to have an offline brainstorm about how we do this and we'll talk about it next week. Was it chocolate? Mate. Strawberry. No, I don't like strawberry flavoured things.

Or mint. I don't like strawberry flavoured things because as a kid, mum used to put medicine in my strawberry Nesquik. And, like, I'd go to the doctor and I'd be sick and I'd be like, what do I have to do? And he'd be like, oh, two Nesquiks a day. And my mum was putting medicine in it. I know.

I have trust issues now. Hey, this is Dr. from Colorado and you're listening to Towing in Ryan. Tomorrow on the show, things you can say whilst gardening. Gardening. And also in the bedroom. Are you a gardener? We just planted that veggie garden. Oh, in the bedroom. Are you a gardener? We just planted that veggie garden. Oh, in the massive courtyard. And figured out the hose situation and stuff, yeah.

A lot of people on Patreon got a private video from your courtyard during the week. I haven't told you about some of the replies we got from those either. What? People were very impressed. Oh, okay. Mate. Anyway, speaking of the patrons.

A shout out to a few of our champion tappers over at our Patreon. Michael, Alan Atherton, Travis Pancake, Luke Tuckerman and Talia. I have some feedback actually before we get into feedback. Okay. Someone posted in the Facebook group and I don't actually know if I approved it but I saw it and I thought, that's really aggressive but quite funny. What is our paid subscription thing called?

Patreon. What are the people that pay and subscribe called? Patreons? Okay, they aren't called Patreons. What are they called? They're called Patrons. Oh, fuck me. How many times have we said Patreons? So there's this're called patrons oh fuck me how many times have

we said so there's this thing and it's like hey love you guys but this thing really fucks me off um they're called patrons and it's a patreon and i was like patreon is like the patreon is what it's no patreon is like what the thing is called but they're patrons but they're patrons what have we been calling them patreonsons. Fuck, how many times have we said that? How fucking annoying is that? As much, alright, who have you messaged? I can't remember. I saw it and I, it just Well, what I'll say to that person is, great

note, if you could email that to October when we started fucking saying it. Yeah, go back in fucking time. Because I've said that a thousand times and I feel like a fucking idiot now. I feel like such a dick and I didn't even think about it. Well, I'm just going to call them Patreons anyway. Me too because I feel like we just back it in. Yeah.

Yeah. Say it with confidence. Not with too much confidence we've had. But if you would like to become a Patreon, patreon.com slash Tony and Rowan. Ciara in Arizona. Is it Chiara? Hey.

Is it with a C? Tomato, tomato, Patreon. Ciara, Ciara, yeah, okay. Yeah, S-I-E-R. Oh, is it an S? It's a C. Oh, you just said S? Please don't yell at me.

Do you know anything? Read this. I think that's, I would say that's Ciara. Ciara from Arizona. Not what I said. Ciara. Ciara. Ciara.

Ciara. Yes. She's like, hey, it's actually Sierra. Steve, tell me what your name is. Shmiera from Shmarishmona. Well, this is in the comments, so if you're listening, please tell us how to pronounce your name in the episode thread of this video. Help, I'm sitting in my car enjoying the nice weather

with the windows pulled down on my lunch break. I'm just going for a bit of a cruise. I want to get out of the office, sit in the car, play some tunes. I've got an hour for lunch. I'm going to spend my a cruise. I want to get out of the office, sit in the car, play some tunes. I've got an hour for lunch. I'm going to spend my time doing what I want to do. That actually sounds really nice. A lunch break at an office job is fucking sacred. Yeah.

Yeah. My boss pulls up next to me as I'm listening to the Pork Sword episode and made eye contact as Ryan says, make the trouser snake disappear. Schmiera. Oh. I can't go back into work now. So I was like, I wonder what happened. Then Rachel Brown, no, Laura Rachel Brown's her name,

replies, time to quit your job. Good luck with your new identity. Yeah, I would, yeah. Oh, my God, how embarrassing. And it's probably what it sounds like is maybe a boss that you don't love. Yeah. Because if it was a boss that you got along with really great, they'd be like, Shmira, what are you fucking listening to?

And she would have been like, lol, this amazing podcast they tweet at celebrities. But, yeah, oh, okay. And especially the trouser snake. Well, Shmira, if you have had to quit your job and you need some support, Ryan is good for it. So he could do that. You love adoption.

If you need adopting. Call Ryan, John is good for it. So he could do that. You love adoption. If you need adopting. Call Ryan John. I know someone. My mum will take you in. She's got experience. Tweet at Ryan John and Dizzy Rascal. My mum is trying to adopt a dog and it says, do you have experience with adoption on the form?

And she's like, well, I adopted a whole human. Yeah, does that count? And they're like, no. She's like, oh, well. It's actually so hard to adopt a dog. Yeah. There are so many hoops. Well, with me, they couldn I adopted a whole human. Yeah, does that count? And they're like, no. She's like, oh, well. It's actually so hard to adopt a dog. Yeah. There are so many hoops. Well, with me, they couldn't get rid of me.

Yeah, they're just like, fire sale. Like, take him. Supply and demand between dogs and humans is like not comparable. Speaking of the pork sword episode. Yeah. I asked people in our group to tell me, what do you call the pork sword? Oh. So, Tony, I thought.

What do you call it? I don't really think I have a name for it. Like, it's just, I don't know, it's just, we'd never come up in conversation. Is that weird? No, I don't, I guess not. But, like, if you, you know, zipped your jeans shut and you went, oh, it's caught me tallywhacker or something, like, would you say that?

Or would you say, like, oh, it's got caught on my penis? Is that what you would say? Like... I think the only time it would be used, if I were to use it in a sentence that might be used in our house, it would be Bridget saying, stop shaking your dick at me and put some clothes on. Oh, yep. Okay.

So it's just dick for you? I think so. Okay. That's fine. Because I think I've said before our bedroom and bathroom are at opposite ends of the house. So you do a little runway show. A shower shimmy.

Yeah, so I run from one to the other and go. That's pretty funny. Not that I've seen it. If you've seen it. Yeah. Yeah, thank you. So Hannah Gale is from North Carolina. So she calls it the meat stick.

Oh, no. Tony, would you, in your best North Carolina accent, be able to use that in a sentence? Did I tell you this is what we're going to do? No. I'm hungover and you're going to make me do the accent. Just give it your best. Okay, meat stick.

I'm from North Carolina. Is it a bit like that? Yeah. North Carolina. Hey, boy, show me your meat stick. No, that was a bit too southern, wasn't it? Carolina. Put that meat stick in my mouth.

Show me that meat stick. I'm going too southern. Yeah. And also just it's very casual day-to-day chat. Yeah. I think you need to give it the energy and the passion that it deserves. I want to see your meat stick. I just don't like the term meat stick.

Yeah, it's aggressive by Hannah. It sounds like something that like a butcher would talk about. Okay, imagine you're Hannah and you're going to the butcher and you're trying to pick up the butcher by using the meat stick term. Okay. I'll grab a kilo of chicken breast and a meat stick. And then he goes, what's that? And she goes, well, I'd like to see yours.

I've never picked someone up. In a butcher shop or ever. All right, next one. Luke Grasby is from Cold Lake, Alberta, home of the Cold Lake High School Royals. Go Royals. Go Royals. He calls it the beef needle.

Yeah. Yeah, and he likes to use the phrase, you know, like the needle and injection. So this is Luke Raspberry from Alberta. Okay. Canada-y? Oh, Canada-y. Oh, you want to touch my needle?

Sorry, just going to stop you there. Canada is not located in Sweden? Yeah, I know. Oh. But it's kind of like sing-songy, like a Canadian voice, isn't it? Oh, Canada-y. Oh, Canada, eh? Oh, yeah, how are you going? Is that kind of Canada?

No, you've gone over to England, I think. Oh, okay. Which is the opposite. From Sweden, you've gone away from Canada. You've gone back the other way. Okay. I'm Canadian. Is that Canadian?

Oh, I used to be addicted to heroin and now I'm addicted to the meat needle. I mean. Different kind of injection, but it still gets me high. Is that too much? Could I talk about heroin on a podcast? Well, you just did. I think. Because you can't talk about heroin on the radio? Well, you just did. But they're radio. Because you can't talk about heroin on the radio.

You can. I did once. You can't just be like pro-heroin. You can talk about the concept of it. Yeah. Okay, so do you reckon that's all? Well, you've said I've moved off the bad stuff and onto the good stuff. Yeah, so I'm a vision of health.

Yeah. Although I don't think if someone was like, are you a vision of health, you'd be like, let me show you the perfect example of audio, and it's you doing that. And it's me saying that. Well, Your Honour, as you can tell, the person from Sweden, the UK, and Liverpool, who's in Canada,

actually used to do heroin, not currently, so we're fine. Yeah, so it's all good. Yeah, and it's actually James Brasby that's doing heroin, not me, so. Yeah. Justin Beale, which is Ali Mack's brother. Ali Mack Beale? He's from Liverpool.

That is very funny. My mum loved Ally McBeal. It's a classic show. Whose mum didn't, but my mum loved Ally McBeal. Jeez, that was a big four years. Callista Flockhart. Late 90s. Gorgeous.

Gorgeous. Gorgeous, yeah. He is, in fact, from Liverpool. Oh, fuck off. And he calls Russell the love muscle. Liverpool. Oh, you want to touch Russell the love muscle? Oh, yeah, I do because it's so cold outside in Liverpool.

The Beatles are from here. I don't think the Beatles are from there. Aren't they? Did I mention it was Liverpool, the suburb in West Sydney? Are you fucking serious? We have to take it up with Justin Beale. All right. Oh, yeah, Darl, do you want to touch Russell the meat muscle?

Oh, yeah, I'd love to, sweetheart. Yeah, okay, great, Darl. I'll see you in five. I'm still not good at an Australian accent either. Final one. Oh, please, stop. Arthur is from Northern Ireland. Okay, yep.

I can't say this with a straight face. It's so bad. Russell calls it. I can't even say it can't say this for the straight face. It's so bad. Russell calls it, I can't even say it. It's so cringe. Can you just read it? Oh, yeah. Okay. No, I'm not saying that.

Russell from Northern Ireland calls it the pussy plummeter. Russell from Northern Ireland calls it the pussy plummeter. I just want to bet that none of these blogs have ever actually slept with anyone. I don't think they've ever had to use it. Well, in case they haven't used it, now they'll know because Tony Lodge is helping them with their day-to-day business. Now they'll know because Tony Lodge is helping them with their day-to-day business. Top of the morning to you.

Northern Ireland. Northern Ireland. Do you want to go and get a Guinness tonight? Oh, yeah, I'm going to take out the pussy plometer. I think that was a bit Scottish, but can we please move on? Oh, sorry, did I say Northern Ireland? Oh, fuck off. I meant North Melbourne is in the northern suburbs.

Yeah, show me your pussy plometer. Yeah, all right. Oh, my God. That was a bit graphic. Oh, it was. I don't think that I ever thought that I would say the words pussy plummeter, let alone on a podcast that people listen to. That's a real shame.

These things happen, though. You get that on the big jobs, don't you? My, oh, my love to see it this week is that I've put a lot of time into myself this week. Have you? Yeah, I have. I had a therapy session. A friend of mine is a life coach, so I had like a session with him and I went for walks most days.

Did you? Yeah, and I put time into my calendar to know that I time-blocked everything this week to make sure that I would. I'm glad to hear that you're walking. It's great. Yeah, it was just nice to get out and do some stuff. What happened with you being working from home, living at home, cooped up in the apartment,

just getting some air sometimes? And just because I think it's like, and I've said this before, I've got time but I don't make time. And this week I made time for that a lot and it was just really nice. I'm really exhausted today. That's because you drank three bottles of wine last night. Yeah, it is not going to help. I time blocked myself. So by Friday, I was feeling so great. I drank 28 bottles of Guinness and brought myself back to where

I started. Yeah. And so now I'm just so confused. Why didn't it work? But I love to see it because it's nice to make time for yourself. It is. Yeah. And don't worry, this isn't going to become a hashtag grateful podcast. No. But I do. I mean, the difference you can feel. Oh, you actually can. Yeah. There's been much debate in the Tony and Ryan podcast about who gives good recommendations. Originally, I was the one giving shit recommendations.

But I feel like the tide turned and everyone started to realise that, in fact, Ryan gave the good ones and Tony was shit. Yeah. Last week, what did you recommend? Oh, Only Murders in the Building. With? Steve Martin, Martin Shaw and Selena Gomez. Oh, for fuck's sake. Obviously, you didn't like it.

It is fantastic. It is so good. Oh, you love to say it. You know how it's got a bit of quirkiness about it? Yeah. It becomes a musical and then it's not. Yeah. Sometimes those things rub me up the wrong way,

but I just really got into this. It was really good, hey? I just think it was just a bit of a different concept. Yeah. And individually, like, I didn't realise, not in a bad way, but Selena Gomez is a great actress. Yeah. And her character's so baller. You're just like, oh, I didn't realise, not in a bad way, but Selena Gomez is a great actress. Yeah. And her character's so baller.

You're just like, oh, she's awesome. Yeah, she really shines in it. She's, like, very good. So the episode I'm up to, and I won't spoil anything for anyone, Only Murders in the Building is the TV show. I just watched the silent episode. Oh, amazing. Incredible.

And so different, like, such a, yeah. You're kind of waiting for it to, and then after a while, I'm like, I think this is. Just what they're, yeah. And it just shows how good an actor and actress you need to be to tell a story without using words. Yeah. I thought it was great.

A great way to highlight deafness in the media as well. Yeah. Like it's very interesting. And didn't make it weird. It's just like this is what it is for this person. Yeah. That's how they experience it. Very special.

And didn't make a huge deal even though the whole episode was tough. Yeah. It was nice. It wasn't like performative. It was actually just tough. Yeah. It was nice. It wasn't, like, performative. It was actually just great. Yeah. It was. So, Tony Lodge, you gave a great recommendation.

Yay. You are good at recommendations. I actually could cry. Thank you. I'm so glad that you liked it. It's really good. I actually could cry. Thank you.

I'm so glad that you liked it. It's really good. Meow. I gave her a great recommendation. Yay.