Tony Mantor: Why Not Me ? - Dan Franklin: empowering Autism through awareness and understanding

Episode Date: April 8, 2026

In this episode of 'Why Not Me, Embracing Autism and Mental Health Worldwide,' host Tony Mantor from Nashville, Tennessee, interviews Dan Franklin, a passionate autism advocate with 31 years of lived experience. Dan shares his insights on autistic wiring, trauma responses, masking, scripting, burnout, and sensory processing. He discusses the challenges faced by autistic individuals navigating a world built for neurotypicals and emphasizes the need for mandatory autism education across society. Dan also touches on the importance of approaching autistic individuals with understanding and compassion, and how proper autism training can facilitate a more inclusive world. Meet Dan Franklin: Autism Advocate Dan's Advocacy Journey Challenges and Misunderstandings Learning and Overcoming Advocacy and Education Efforts Addressing Misconceptions Final Thoughts and Contact Information INTRO/OUTRO: T.Wild Mantor Music BMI The content on Why Not Me: Embracing Autism amd Mental Health Worldwide, including discussions on mental health, autism, and related topics, is provided for informational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed by guests are their own and do not reflect those of the podcast, its hosts, or affiliates.Why Not Me is not a medical or mental health professional and does not endorse or verify the accuracy, efficacy, safety of any treatments, programs, or advice discussed.Listeners should consult qualified healthcare professionals, such as licensed therapists, psychologists, or physicians, before making decisions about mental health or autism- related care.Reliance on this podcast's contents is at the listener's own risk. Why Not Me is not liable for any outcomes, financial or otherwise, resulting from actions taken based on the information provided. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Welcome to Why Not Me, embracing autism and mental health worldwide, hosted by Tony Miatore. Broadcasting from the heart of Music City, USA, Nashville, Tennessee. Join us as our guests share their raw, howful stories. Some will spark laughter, others will move you to tears. These real-life journeys inspire, connect, and remind you that you're never alone. We're igniting a global movement to empower everyone

to make a lasting difference by fostering deep awareness, unwavering acceptance, and profound understanding of autism and mental health. Tune in, be inspired, and join us in transforming the world one story at a time.

Hi, I'm Tony Manteur. Welcome to Why Not Me, embracing autism and mental health worldwide. Joining us today is Dan Franklin. He's a passionate autism advocate with 31 years of lived experience. He brings deep personal insight and extensive self-driven research to conversations about the full autism spectrum. Gifted with a sharp, thoughtful mind,

he speaks candidly about autistic wiring, trauma responses, masking, scripting, burnout, sensory processing, and the realities of navigating a world built for neurotypicals. His mission is clear to push for meaningful mandatory autism education across society so autistic individuals are understood, accommodated, and respected, not misinterpreted or overlooked. He has a wealth of information, so before we dive into our episode, we'll be back with an uninterrupted show right after a word from our sponsors. Thanks for joining us today.

Yes, thank you very much. Oh, it's my pleasure. So if you would, give us a little information on what you do to advocate for autism. Well, I've been doing a lot of autism advocacy work, you know. I've been in contact with, you know, the state senator's office and a lot of autism organizations to try to understand autism more and to try to contribute to, you know, gaining more mandatory training and education with places like public transit, police officers, prosecutor offices, schools, and just anywhere in the general public that may encounter folks. on the autism spectrum because I feel that it's very misunderstood. You know, this world sadly is

built around neurotypicals and for people like me who are level one functioning regarding autism. So when you travels, do you find it challenging? It's challenging because, you know, you have to learn these ways to mask autism, so to speak. But then when you do that, you don't get feud as being autistic from other people because they just don't understand how the autistic brain works or tendencies with it. And so I've been doing a lot of research to even understand myself more, but also to understand, you know, how I can help others understand autism. Okay, let's dig into that a little bit. When was it that you was diagnosed as autistic? Well, I was diagnosed with autism at the age of three, and it's been quite the journey.

as I say. You know, I'm glad to learn how to kind of adapt and adjust to this world and things. And I just deal that the system is broken. You know, you see so many folks on the autism spectrum that they're tied up in the legal system. And you see just how much the legal system misinterprets and doesn't factor autism into things. You know, like even judges I forgot to mention previously, they, I feel need more mandatory education and training regarding autism because autism is completely different than mental illness in my opinion. And if autism is a factor in things, it needs to be fully explained to the right people so that there's a clear, full understanding in how autism plays a factor in things. And that it's not used as an excuse like a lot of people might say

or, you know, think or try to portray it as. Okay, now you have lived experience. You've been through a lot of things. You've seen different things. You have a good feeling for what's going on in the world. There are many people out there that are trying to learn about autism. There are many people that are autistic that are still trying to learn about autism. What can you tell them from your lived experiences that you see that can help better change

the perception of what you're trying to do? Well, you know, so there was a matter from Island County four years ago that I don't really want to discuss on this podcast just because, you know, I don't have the plea agreement in front of me. I don't know if it's something I'm even supposed to talk about. With everything that happened regarding that, that matter, I feel, has really pushed me to push for change with autism because autism with my case was not factored in. and an expert was not called in, and that's kind of just where I'm going to leave it at and things,

but I can talk to you on a different time, more into detail when it's not on this podcast. You know, with being done the ways that I was, and having gone through the broken system, so to speak, it's just opened my eyes to really see that I'm not the only person on the spectrum that has been wronged by the justice system and has gone through the tremendous, traumatic experience and having it affect mental health decline and just, you know, ruminating on it,

so to speak. Then years later, just realizing the ways that autism was not factored in. And since then is when I've really learned more about autism than ever before. What were some of the things that you learned? And how did you go about learning them? Who helped you? When I had met with Doug, you know, a while back, there were things that I had talked with him about, tendencies like the masking where it's like you have to find ways to mask the autism to kind of appear normal and fit in. But then at the same time, it comes at a cost because then when there's a challenging high pressure overstimulating situation, the autistic aspect or part in things gets completely look past, so to speak. And so that part is hard.

But then the other thing is, like I even told Doug too, people on the higher functioning and can learn to speak, normal and all folks in the spectrum have amazing high IQ and levels of intelligence, but they can really struggle with the interactions socially and things. Yes, they can have a very difficult time in that form for sure. Now, what other things did you see or hear that you learned about it? The biggest thing is, is also like the scripting part as well with it, to where it's like, you know, there's two aspects that I like to explain that I've learned. You may use words and phrases that you've heard other places, but you may use it out of context or not even know the meaning, but because you're feeling pressured to speak or say something, then you might say it but not understand it till later.

But then the other aspect with the scripting that I like to tell people is you may understand it, but you may not know if it's the right time or place to say it or if it makes sense with the conversation or topic at hand. you know and so there's that yes that's very interesting now you said there were several things what other challenges did you find that were important to be discussed the other part that i also talked to dug about was the deliberation challenges when under duress you know and dug had explained that when a person on the spectrum is under duress there's something in the brain with the frontal vortex part of the brain that blocks or clouds the ability to deliberate In other words, you know, you have challenges thinking before you say and do things. But there again, if you've at times showed that you can be intelligent and self-aware,

that it's always expected that you're supposed to be. And then so it's just, it's very challenging for people to understand. And so I've learned a lot about that and, you know, autistic burnout and sensory overload and sensory processing issues slash challenges and things. and a difficult condition to live with, but at the same time, it can be a gift in many ways, too. What are some of the challenges that you've overcome? You can sit back now and look back and say, hey, I used to do this, but now, because of everything that I've gone through, this is how I handle it. So what are some of those challenges?

Well, I know when I was younger, you know, as I told Doug before, too, I don't feel that my brain was as developed as is now with, you know, experiences of things and knowledge and things like that. Back when I was younger, I feel that I was more vulnerable and gullible to being taken advantage of in things and being set up and being used and taken advantage of. And then as I've gotten older, I've learned to recognize when that's happening and how to not let it happen. The social interactions have also been very challenging because I'm a very outgoing social creature, but then there are also as times where I get, you know, overwhelmed because so much

energy gets spent on masking autism to where you can't really put your energy into use the ways that you want because you're so focused on masking. So then, you know, you have challenges with like your interactions with people and, you know, and this person might think you're off or not understand everything and then you might get shut out or outcasted or not included on things. or whatever, or you might get talked about, people might try and slander you to try to gain that sort of power and control and that narrative-driven aspect, so to speak, it's hard, you know, and so I've had to do, as I said earlier, a lot of research about autism to not just understand

myself better, but to understand how I can advocate. You know, where I met Doug was at D3, the decriminalized developmental disabilities organization, and they have the once a month meetings that I attend. And they've been responsible for passing laws and policy changes at the state level regarding autism nationwide, trying to get that education and knowledge and aspect to things out there. And so just meeting with them has even given me so much confidence to want to, you know, be a part of that and see how I can talk to like the state senator's office and autism

organizations to really open people's eyes on the real true advanced aspect of autism that I don't feel has really been introduced and how it's important to understand things so that the right support can be gotten but also the right understanding can be made so to speak the legal system if needed or mental health and things like that you've mentioned that you're an advocate and that you spend time speaking with senators and legislators from those conversations whether at the state or regional level, what have you actually seen that gives you hope? And where do you think that the lawmakers can make a very meaningful difference? What stands out to you?

What do you see happening that truly can move the needle in the direction you need? Well, it's hard because, you know, I've talked to Hayden from Senator Patty Murray's office, and I had talked to him once before, and I know that Doug and people from D3, We're going to set up another meeting to have, you know, us all meet with him. Because the thing is, is if you only have one person that's kind of pushing for these things, it's not going to be as likely to be heard or factored in or recognized or have things done versus if you have more than one person that's kind of pushing for these things. And so, I mean, I've tried to do my part, but we need to get more voices in on the matter.

And I feel that it's very crucial that people on the spectrum are dead. definitely included in these things because when they can hear it from the client the most and from the autistic people directly, that's going to make some of the biggest differences out there because they can hear from those people directly and see how it's such a challenging condition to live with and how easily misunderstood it is, unfortunately. Yes, that's for sure. I hear that from every person I speak with is that people just do not understand how you have to live and what you have to go through and the challenges that you face. But I feel that just gaining the education about autism is the first step because you can't

really advocate and push for change and do the things necessary if you're not educated to know these things. And so the biggest thing for me has been to understand autism more and the brain and how it responds under pressure to certain things or how it might give trauma-based responses because of the past or things like that. Yeah. Now, there are people that work with police and first responders. They go out and tell them their stories and try and educate them. Have you done any of that at all? You know, I actually gave a speech at the Bellingham City Council back on June 23rd at the seven-minute mark. It was about three minutes long because they only allowed everybody three minutes to speak because of the amount of people that want to speak and they

want to get everybody included. I know that there's this gal named Beverly who works with the Ark of Watcomb County and they have been an amazing support and help to me as well. I know that there's the Ark of Washington State that I've even attended the Zoom meetings for and there's been the National Arc that I've been in contact with a little bit. But I know this gal Beverly, she wants to go down to the Bellingham Police Department eventually and bring me with her and kind of educate them about autism and how to appropriately recognize and respond and how to de-escalate versus escalate and understand that certain folks in the spectrum may have had previous traumatic interactions with police. And so if they're resistant to things, it's not that there's something

to hide, so to speak. It's clearly a trauma-based response to things. And then you're stating that maybe instead of sending a police officer, maybe there needs to be an autism. trained crisis worker. I think that's a great idea that you can get out and give information like that that would help so many people. I know that's something that I've been trying to push for as well, especially in Washington and hopefully across the nation, but I feel that there needs to be autism foundations built. Like there needs to be autism trauma-based certified specialists and counselors that

understand autism and trauma and how to best appropriately deal with them. There also needs to be specific autism lawyers and things and whatnot so that people can be best assisted in things. There also needs to be a reform with the justice system. Like if an autistic person gives a false confession or is done wrong by the justice system, well, where's their ability to have justice for being wrong and having the mental health suffering and the job opportunities lost and all these things. Where's that ability? Where's the recognition how they were wrong? I've also learned that if an autistic person feels injustice, they're going to sit there and ruminate, but they're not going to stop feeling injustice until they can get the justice that they're seeking. Yes, those are all good

points. Any other things that you feel that are needed? I just feel that there needs to be more mandatory training. There just has to be because then the general public would understand how to recognize and work with it more, but then the autistic community would feel more comfortable and accommodated to and understood. And I feel that the pain and suffering would end all around, but without the proper training, it's not going to end for as far as the pain and the suffering goes. We got to start doing this. So I'm just doing what I can as far as working with these organizations and trying to get a lot of people with me to push for these things. but I can only do what I can do, you know.

That's right, but the main thing is you are doing it. Yeah. Do you have the opportunity to get together with other people? This way you can put your heads together, come up with new, fresh ideas, then pitch them to the people that can help make change. Yeah, you know, one thing that I've even talked with Beverly from the Ark of Waukem County here in Bellingham, Washington, about and a few others, too, is I've got so many pages, bookmarked,

and screenshot and about autism and the brain and executive functioning challenges and cognitive deficit challenges and things. And I want to be able to put like a meaningful PowerPoint presentation together for the general public. And I would love to be able to give it to people and have people share it with everybody so that people can really see advanced aspects of autism, so to speak, that are currently just not educated or understood. You know what I mean? And so I wanted to do that because being on the spectrum has been hard, being able to find the strength to interact and do things, trying to put my sentences together and be competent at time. And that's the other thing that I forgot to mention is folks on the autism spectrum, just because at times

they can show amazing instances of competency does not mean that they're always competent right then and there or at the time that things occurred. And so that's another thing that needs to be factored into things is that aspect of things. But I know that I've just tried to be able to attend these meetings and do the research because I know I feel that the more people I can talk to it's at least a step in the right direction to make the right changes done. Without the right work, it's not going to get done. Yeah, that's absolutely correct. How do you address this? I was speaking with a guy about six foot to 250 pounds. Really rugged looking good. guy. Yeah. He made a comment to me and it went like this. If I told someone that I had cancer,

they would say, oh, how can I help you? How can I help you? But if I tell them I'm autistic, they say, you don't look autistic. Oh, yeah. How do you address that? Here's a guy that looks like everyone else, and you try to explain the differences that his brain works, and they just don't get it. So how do you handle that? Well, so that's the thing. So it's all about the headspace and mindset and digs. So basically, you know, you can tell it to somebody, but if they are ignorant of autism, as I say, or want to be and don't want to understand, then it's not worth wasting your time and breath with that person or people because you're just going to drain your energy and become frustrated. And so it's all about finding the right people. But then you also might get

frustrated because they just simply misunderstand. And so then it's like, do you get frustrated and get worked up and really emphasize that, yes, I'm autistic and this is how. And then when they sit here and they still are resistant, so to speak, then it's like, you know, you might have an episode, you might have a meltdown, or you can just choose to, you know, whatever, I'm just not going to speak to you. You can say and think what you want kind of thing. And so it's just based upon the current.

headspace and mindset, so to speak, how the response is given. And even when I was younger, I didn't even want to tell people I was autistic, because I was afraid of, you know, certain things happening to me or getting looked at as off or whatever. But as I've gotten older, I've learned to become comfortable with it. I would hope that by sharing it with people that I have, that they would become sympathetic and understanding. But unfortunately, that's not always the case like we would want. But the biggest thing is, is I've even been told too, well, I would have never known you were autistic unless you told me. Yeah, and I've heard that from so many people I've spoken with. And it's like, well, I wonder why that is, because you just don't take the time

to do the research and understand autism like me, and you haven't lived it, and you don't have someone who's autistic, but a lot of the problem is what this world is, they don't think that you're autistic unless you're nonverbal or your hand flap, and so to speak. And that's a problem And you know something that I've even done with like understanding autism more is even like an example is people on the spectrum, especially level one, can get wrongfully misjudged and assumed to use autism as an excuse. And that's not true. So then the simple solution to understand it more is do the research and look it up. So I'll do things like go on the internet and search. Why does an autistic person get wrongfully assumed or misunderstood to use?

use autism as an excuse when that's not the case and the answers are right there. Why do autistic people get wrongfully accused of manipulation, so to speak, when that's not the case? It's like the answers are right there, you know? Sure, that's the case so many times all they have to do is look it up and find out. Now, where you're autistic, I'm sure you've had several times where you've been overwhelmed, close to a meltdown, or even having a meltdown. So how did you handle? that or how do you handle that when you feel it coming on so that way you can get away from others and handle it yourself so that they don't have a clue as to what's going on well you know it's it's

hard because it depends upon the headspace and a lot of things at the time that things occur and sometimes you're so overwhelmed that you just cannot control the episode of the meltdown or you may have felt so injustice and misunderstood that you may want to leave a barkish voicemail or send a barkish email, so to speak. And I was even learning that when an autistic person leaves a voicemail for a place or sends an email, it's not with malicious intent. It's to express emotional distress and not get interrupted or, you know, halted. And I know that another thing I want to include that's important to things, is the problem is what like when an autistic person does things like that, it's a way to cope with things. But also, when they feel wronged with these kinds of things, the way for them to stop

fixating and ruminating is to kind of get it out of them how they could or can and feel heard, whereas they're in direct situation at hand, they might not have that opportunity. But then when you go on the internet and someone else who's neurotypical minded, or just simply ignorant of autism, you know, they're not going to understand these things. So even something I've done is I've got on the internet and search, why does an autistic person leave a barkish voicemail or send a barkish email, so to speak, to a place that they feel has wronged them or given them injustice? And there's a whole list of things.

And it's not meant to, you know, necessarily harassed. Maybe that's a little part of it, but it's more so to get out the emotional distress and feel heard because otherwise they're just going to sit there and illuminate and fixate on it and then it's just going to consume their soul and their life. In closing, what do you think is important for the listener to hear about what you're trying to do, the message you're trying to put across to everyone not only about your autism, but about the autistic society and what they need so that people can understand that they're just trying to live a life like everyone else. What's important for them to here. Well, I think a big thing that I wanted to mention is the word approach. You know, the way that you

approach an autistic person is going to make a world of difference how the overall interaction goes and how they perceive it and how receptive they can be to what you're saying and whether they're going to shut down to you or the situation at hand. The approach is very key. But then also, there needs to be the actual generosity to want to help people, not just going in it for, you know, hidden motives, so to speak, but actually having it in the heart and soul to understand autism and understand that not all high-functioning autistic people are the same, not all lower-functioning autistic people are the same.

It's all based upon the level of support, past trauma, and it's like, you know, if we want this world and people on the spectrum to get better and thrive, we need to make it a same. a functioning environment to where they are understood and they are accepted for who they are and we stop trying to change them to a gap to neurotypical world in society. Like if a person is in a wheelchair, they have to have accommodations made. You have to be able to build a ramp for them to get up when they're stairs and they can't get up at and they need to be able to accommodate and build a ramp. Well, where's the same kind of aspect or approach with people on the autism

spectrum. It's a big work in progress, but we just have to keep pushing for it, you know, try to understand autism more, understand that autism is not just hand flapping and nonverbal and things. There's a whole spectrum, understanding everything that goes with it and like stop trying to force things on them and stop making them uncomfortable because it's like if people would just let folks in the spectrum thrive and be able to express themselves, they would be a how much intelligence and high IQ that these folks offer and possess and how they can offer so much to the world. But when they're not giving the opportunities, then they just shut down. They have meltdowns.

They go into anti-social isolation mode. And then they don't feel like they're helped. You know, they feel helpless, hopeless, depressed, everything. And then they never get a chance to be able to thrive like the rest of the world. And then the mental health decline just takes over. then you never get to see these folks offer these great things about themselves to the world. Now, would you like to have the listeners contact you? I would love for that.

Okay, give us your contact info then. If they want, you know, they can email me at Big Dog, B-I-G-D-A-W-G-1-2-9-4 at Yahoo.com. Big Dog was my football nickname growing up, even though I've become accustomed to playing basketball in recent years. the rest of it's just my birthday. Well, this has been great. Great information, great conversation. I really appreciate you taking the time to join us today. Hey, thank you, Tony.

You have the good rest of your day and take care. And yeah, let's talk soon. Thank you. It's been my pleasure. Thanks again. Thanks for taking time out of your busy schedule to listen to our show today. We hope you enjoyed it as much as we enjoyed bringing it to you. If you know someone who has a story to share, tell them to contact us at why not me.

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