Tony Mantor: Why Not Me ? - Dianne Greeley: Redefining Advocacy for mental health reform

Episode Date: July 30, 2025

In this episode of 'Why Not Me,' Tony Mantor hosts Dianne Greeley, who shares her firsthand experiences and challenges in advocating for mental health reform. Dianne recounts the struggles her loved one faced with severe mental illness and the inadequate support from health and legal systems. She discusses the journey from personal caretaker to passionate advocate, emphasizing the need for greater awareness, education, and systemic change. Her story highlights the human impact of untreated mental illness and the importance of compassion and involuntary treatment where necessary. Dianne's Personal Story The Struggles and Decline Understanding the System's Failures Dianne's Advocacy Journey Future Plans and Goals Intro Music: T.Wild Mantor Music Publishing BMI The content on Why Not Me: Embracing Autism amd Mental Health Worldwide, including discussions on mental health, autism, and related topics, is provided for informational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed by guests are their own and do not reflect those of the podcast, its hosts, or affiliates.Why Not Me is not a medical or mental health professional and does not endorse or verify the accuracy, efficacy, safety of any treatments, programs, or advice discussed.Listeners should consult qualified healthcare professionals, such as licensed therapists, psychologists, or physicians, before making decisions about mental health or autism- related care.Reliance on this podcast's contents is at the listener's own risk. Why Not Me is not liable for any outcomes, financial or otherwise, resulting from actions taken based on the information provided. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

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Tune in, be inspired, and join us in transforming the world one story at a time. Hi, I'm Tony Mantor. Welcome to Why Not Me, embracing autism and mental health world. Joining us today is Diane Greeley. She is here to tell us a different perspective. If you listen to May 15th, the Jessica Ferguson episode, she shared her personal story of her brother's struggles with serious mental illness. She told her story of her and her sister and how they tried to help their brother. In this episode, Diane, who shared a loving relationship, offers her own deeply personal reflections, shedding light on his struggles from a different angle.

This profound experience transformed her into a passionate advocate for mental health reform and dedicated to creating change in a flawed system. This is a moving conversation that underscores the human toll of untreated mental illness and the fight for a compassionate future. So before we dive into our episode, we'll be back with an uninterrupted show right after a word from our sponsors. Thanks for coming on. My pleasure. I think the best place to start is the beginning when you first noticed something wasn't quite right. Okay. I first knew that he was really struggling when he invited me over to his house and he told me that he had just been released from

the hospital. We hadn't spoken for a couple of weeks, so I had no idea that he had gone into the hospital, but I found out that he had been in the hospital and had just been released. And he asked me to join him and his sisters in a Zoom call with his clinician at the community behavioral health center that he had been going to, had been a client of for 10 years. So that was the next day. So I joined in on that. He recognized that at the time he had insight into his illness and well-being, and he recognized that he needed some support around him. So that call went fine, and I think the next day his sisters and I exchanged numbers to sort of keep in communication about what was going on for him. Okay. And then what happened next? Unfortunately,

over the next couple of months, he just continued to decline, and his sisters and I were reaching out to many different organizations for help. We saw that. he was not well and that he needed help and support. And we were doing our best to get him that support. It just, we never really found what we needed. Yeah, that's unfortunate. Now, if I remember correctly, one of his sisters was living with him. Correct. Yeah, I tried very hard to sort of be with him and hang out with him to keep him safe. And so his sister and I talked a lot because I was at the house quite a bit. We were just noticing very, very odd behavior that we just, we knew he needed. help. We knew he needed treatment. We knew he needed a hospital stay. We really didn't have any power

to make that happen. Yes. So did he think there was something wrong? Did he fight it? Or did he just not know that he was going downhill? So I don't know exactly. I think it, you know, it progressed over between February. I think most definitely April, May, he had, he was experiencing anisagnosia and completely lost insight into even the fact that he had an illness. He He was, every time that I tried to convince him and talk to him about going to a clinic or seeking some help in a hospital, he was adamant. Just, he was fine. He didn't need treatment.

He was fine. He had completely lost the ability to care for himself, but he didn't, he thought he was fine. Okay, so was this the first time you've ever gone through something like this? Yes. Yes. So what was going through your mind? I was worried about him.

I was pretty dumbfounded that all of the places we reached out to didn't really help us. I guess I assumed that, especially in a state like Massachusetts, I think Massachusetts has excellent behavior, health, services, and help for people with general mental illness, things like anxiety, depression. But for people with severe mental illnesses, Massachusetts has failed. Yeah, that's a sad thing. Now, I spoke with this sister. she came on my podcast and we discussed several things.

Now, what did you talk about with both the sisters in how you was handling this? Because it was one of those situations where none of you had ever crossed that path before. Right. So what was going through everyone's minds on how to address this situation? We were all really just clueless, and this was all happening to us. us, like his behavior, our concerns for him certainly grew as time went on, but we felt like we were running plain catch up, very, very unprepared. I have learned so much since, but at the time, I did not understand psychosis. I didn't even know what anisagnosia was. I didn't know treatment

laws. I really had no idea. What I tried mostly to do was hang out with him, keep him safe, and try to do my best to take care of him. Sure, and that's a tough situation. Now, if you can, to our listeners what your capacity was with him? I'm a caretaker. I spent my career as a early childhood educator, as a child care provider, and I recognize the humanity and everybody, and I just want to help people who need it. He and I got along very well. We really understand each other, but it grew to a point where I could not at all understand what was going on for him. I was watching as his illness was taking over, and And I had no idea what to do to help him.

Yeah, and that's just so tough to be in a situation like that. Now, as it progressed, how did that affect your relationship with him? I know that it was really exhausting to be around him. His mind was going a mile at a minute. Definitely his body was also. He would speak in Spanish a lot. I did my best to understand him, but he was speaking so quickly that it was hard to. We got along most of the time.

There were times I needed a break, and I would just, kind of, you know, I got to go, you know, I'll see you in a couple of days. I also tried to give his sisters a break because it was really challenging to be around him and to handle his rapid speech and ideas and all of the things he wanted to do. So I tried very hard to help his family with that, to give them a break as well. I love him. I mean, he's a wonderful person and I knew he was in there. I mean, I know he was in there. And we did not have the power to bring him out. And we didn't, we didn't understand it. None of us really understood what was going on. Yeah, that's tough. Now, how long had you been saying him? We met in 2021. Honestly, within a couple of weeks, I felt like

I knew, have known him forever. We were together for almost a year, maybe, and most definitely his illness affected our relationship, even before he was manic and then eventually in psychosis. He had definitely had mood swings. I saw him in depressed episodes, for sure, and there were times that he just sort of shot down and didn't talk to me, which was very hard at first. I didn't understand it was due to his illness. After this happened a couple of times, I understood it, but I think he's a wonderful person, and I was okay with that. So what were your thoughts? How did you figure out that he was actually going through psychosis at that point in time? If he was kind of going in and out over the period of time that you knew him. When did it actually set in that, hey, we've got an

issue here, we've got a problem, and we have to figure out how to handle this? I mean, the way that he was in 2023, I had never seen anything like that before. In the previous years, I had seen him just depressed. I had never seen him in a state of mania. It was mania in the beginning, but then there was definitely a clear shift in that he did not. He was not in touch with reality. It was really hard to talk to him. Okay. So he's still incarcerated at this point in time, correct? Yes. Are you still in contact with him?

Yes. So how is he now compared to before when all this had started? With adequate treatment, he's himself again. Unfortunately, he was hospitalized in 2023. Before he was arrested, he was hospitalized three times. He definitely came out of the hospital just as sick as he had been when he went in, which was really sad and hard to see. I went to visit him a couple of times, and both times I said, I asked to speak to the doctor, any provider that was working with him. He was right next to me and didn't object. I was never given that opportunity.

The hospital that he was brought to twice was going through a financial crisis, and they were focused on profit over care. It was severely understaffed. I remember being horrified when I arrived there at the hospital to see him and at the lack of staff. Just the very poor treatment that was being offered to him at the time. I have learned since that state leaders knew of this hospital's problems, yet didn't do anything about it. And many lives were lost because of their neglect. And that, I think, is part of what failed for him. Yeah, that's really sad. So have you become an advocate now? Are you advocating for him and while you do that, hopefully helping others?

I will never teach again from this experience. I am a different person than I was before this all happened. I will never stop advocating for better treatment, better medical care, and improvements in how our state, Massachusetts and the country treat people with severe mental illnesses. I'm horrified by what I have seen, witnessed, heard, and I have to do what I can for the rest of my life to improve things and to make sure that these people matter and that they are taken care of. Yeah, that's a great way to look at it. Now, are you working for any advocacy or what's your plans on that? I'm not working at the moment. I am sort of trying to figure out who I am now. Who I am for sure involves advocating.

I have reached out to TACT treatment advocacy center. People there have been wonderful, very supportive. I got in touch with Anne from National Shattering Silence Coalition pretty soon after this all happened, and she's been wonderful. I'm just learning everything that I can and trying to make things better. I think that's great. Your story is so different from everyone else, but yet it's the same as everyone else. Yeah.

I think where it's different from my podcast standpoint is a lot of the people I have on my podcast have a lived experience of their sons or daughters growing up and having to deal with it through over a long period of time. Some are advocates working like TAC or NSSC or any organization like that. You, on the other hand, was dating him and then all of a sudden it just started coming on. And then it evolved into a situation that was the big unknown for you. You'd never seen anything like that. No.

I always make the comment that it's the big unknown and people don't know what to do. So how are you navigating through this? So you'll be in a situation of where you can tell others how to navigate through it, kind of like you did. I am doing the best that I can, I think, is all that I can. say, I don't feel at all ready to be. I think that I am one day at a time, really. My experience is after his arrest, even with city leaders and people in the criminal legal system have been more traumatic than even the events prior to his arrest. Okay, can you expand on that some?

I can. What makes you say that about the city leaders? What have they done, or maybe what have may not done. So I was taking care of him the weekend that he was arrested. I had brought him to my house. He had complained that the altitude in his bedroom was too high. And I live in the basement of my parents' home. I invited him to stay with me, hoping that he would get some sleep, get some rest, wanted to give his family a break. My parents love him, and he was always welcome here, is always welcome here. I was visited by detectives. the night he was arrested. That experience was traumatic. I told them the truth. I did everything I could to help them because that was the right thing to do. What they did from there was not honest or professional or, um, it's been traumatic. I will say that. I had no idea how unfair the criminal legal system is. I've been lied to so many times by city officials, leaders and the people in the criminal legal system. I've done everything I can to help. I did everything I could to help him beforehand, and I've done everything I can to help the system do what it has asked me to do, and I've been treated terribly.

That, to me, is just a teeny piece of how he has been treated, and it's ruined me as a person, but I am building back from it, just slowly. So what stands out to you? It doesn't have to be anything specific. What stands out through the whole process that surprised you that made you realize things weren't as you thought they were? So I guess after he was arrested, I was so taken aback by what had happened, knowing that his sisters and I had done everything we could to try to get him adequate help. I just needed to understand how that happened. I just sort of dove into research and looked into everything. I could to figure out how this happened. And I learned that the city that he lived in has a community crisis intervention team created in 2021 to support residents of the city and their families when a person is going through a mental health crisis. Not one member of this community crisis

intervention team ever reached out to this family, his family. I learned that they offered mental health court sessions for residents. This was never offered. to him. None of the supportive services and resources that had been committed to by the city were offered to him or his family. I went to City Hall before I knew all this to sort of say, hey, how did this happen? Let's work together to make it better. That sounds really good. How was the reception to you? I was welcomed that first, but then when I started to ask more questions, that welcoming attitude changed. Many mistakes were made. The hospital, did not do what they were supposed to do.

The community behavioral health center that he was a client of did not do what they were supposed to do. I looked into it. His sister reached out to them 22 times. During these months, he was struggling. They never stepped up to help him. I, the legal system is not fair or just at all. So even with all the things that didn't happen the way that you'd hoped they would,

did anything good come out of this that you can look back and, say, okay, that was worth it, at least for that point in time? I know that I'm meant to be in this situation, as tragic as it is. I know that my life experiences and who I am, I am met for this. It has been extremely painful and hard to navigate, and I'm still working on that. But I have met some really incredible people because of this. My experiences have changed me, and I'm committed to this to making things better. I think that for the past couple years, for me, it's been educating myself, trying to learn how this world works and all of the pieces I can about severe mental illness and psychosis and anisagnosia.

That's a huge part of what I'm doing now is educating myself. That's great. So what are your plans for the future? Now that you're diving into this, you're learning, you're absorbing it all, where do you see yourself going from here? Make change. Improvements have to be made. As a society, we have completely neglected and abandoned people with severe mental illness. Our leaders have chosen to look away and not acknowledge the reality.

Families, I feel good when I can support other families who are in similar situations. I mean, nobody's in the exact same situation, but it feels good to be able to do a little bit to support other people. I care for people. That's who I am. I can't see this problem and then look away. I'm just going to keep learning and doing whatever I can to make. improvements. Yes, do you have any plans on how you're going to implement that and what you think needs to be done so you can help to make those improvements? I think most definitely educating.

I think that education is a huge piece. I think that the general public needs an education, but I think also that public defenders, district attorneys, judges, people involved in the criminal legal system need an education. They need to be educated about severe mental illness. I think that providers and clinicians need to be educated on protocols for sharing information with caregivers of people with severe mental illness, as well as many other things. I have specific goals in my state that I'm working towards because Massachusetts has failed people with severe mental illness so terribly. There are lots of things to do in Massachusetts.

Where he is now is the only state forensic psychiatric hospital in the country that is run by the Department of Correction and not the Department of Mental Health. That is absolutely not okay. So that's one goal to work on that bill to change oversight to the Department of Mental Health. Yeah, that's good. So you're planning on reaching out to senators and legislators trying to make changes through legislation. Yeah, I have. I mean, I send a lot of emails.

That's great. So what's the response been? It's been tough. Most people don't want to hear me, but I'm going to keep at it. I just, what happened to me, what happened to him, this story needs to be told and it needs to be understood for the failures that happened along the way. That's the other piece. I think that city and government officials have not acknowledged at all the failures and that needs to happen because you can't improve things if you don't understand them. One of my goals is shedding light.

I think that's great. What you're doing is very inspirational and hopefully you're going to others get through a lot of things that they're going through that they don't understand by doing what you're doing. I think it's really great that not only are you standing by him, but you're becoming this advocate. So you just have to keep moving forward with it because you're going to help a lot of people. We've been good friends. Even the times that we were not dating, we've remained good friends. Yes, and that says a lot about you and what you're doing. So, like I said, you just got to keep moving forward. Now, it's all about information, education,

and getting as much information that you can out to the people so they can learn about what's going on. I just thought of one other thing. I have been making videos as a way to educate people. One thing that I felt like soon after this all happened was that we treat animals in this state better than we treat people with severe mental illness. And it made me think about commercials on TV

for the ASPCA and those really heart-wrenching commercials that I know that if I watch them, I'm going to donate immediately. So I felt like maybe I could reach people with that. I think that's a great idea. Videos can be great tools for people to learn by. Something like that. So I've made a couple of videos as a way to highlight what's happening. Yeah, that's great because people just don't understand sometimes. Yeah, and people just don't know. I absolutely agree. And I was one of them. Before I started this podcast, I knew nothing about it.

The more I've taught with people, and it's been consistently talking with people over the last five or six months that I've learned so much from it. So you are right. I think what you're doing is definitely a very good thing. Now, is there anything that you would like to tell the listeners that you think is just very important that they hear about what you're doing and serious mental illness?

People living with severe mental illnesses are human beings. They deserve care and compassion, like everybody else. And sometimes that care and compassion requires that we make sure that they receive involuntary treatment because when a person is suffering from anisognosia,

they are not going to voluntarily go along with treatment. I think that people need to understand that that is care and compassion sometimes. And I think a continuum of care is very important. He was, my loved one was dumped on the streets each time that he was released from the hospital. No communication with family or caregivers, and that's not okay. Yeah, I think just shedding light, my goal is to shed light on what happened to make sure that nothing like this ever happens again to anybody and to just push that we need to care for people with severe mental illnesses because they deserve that.

Absolutely. Well, this has been great. Great conversation. Great information. I really appreciate you taking the time to join us today. Thank you very much for having me on. I have listened to many of your podcasts recently. Amazing.

I think what you're doing is incredible. And I want to thank you because our voices are not heard. And you are doing such an excellent service for people. It's wonderful what you're doing. Thank you very much. It's been my pleasure. Thanks again. Thanks for taking time out of your busy schedule to listen to our show today. We hope you enjoyed it as much as we enjoyed bringing it to you.

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