Tony Mantor: Why Not Me ? - Joe Gilotti: Thriving Against the Odds – Fostering Inclusivity and Independence in the Autism Community

Episode Date: August 7, 2024

Send us a text How does an autistic individual navigate life’s challenges to find joy and purpose in a supportive community? Join us on this episode of "Why Not Me? The World Podcast" as we welcome Joe Gilotti, a remarkable man who has turned his diagnosis of Asperger's into a journey of resilience and triumph. Joe takes us back to his childhood, sharing the hurdles he faced during his school years and the bullying that tested his resolve. With the support of his family and the nurturing environment at Winston Preparatory School, Joe found his footing and began to thrive. The Prospector Theater isn't just a place of employment for Joe, it's a cornerstone of his personal growth. We hear about the heartwarming moments that make the theater a beacon of inclusivity, like the joy of a young employee with Down syndrome celebrating her new job. Joe's nearly decade-long journey at the theater saw him evolve from working in embroidery to running a small business and exploring his passion for graphic design and cosplay. The theater's mission of providing meaningful employment to people with disabilities has profoundly shaped Joe’s life, giving him the confidence to live independently and fostering a deep sense of acceptance and friendship. Our conversation wraps up with a look at the vibrant community and strong sense of camaraderie that makes the Prospector Theater so unique. Joe shares the theater’s origin story and its mission-driven culture, emphasizing the importance of inclusive employment opportunities. As we conclude this heartfelt episode, we express our immense gratitude to Joe for sharing his extraordinary journey. We invite our listeners to connect with us for more inspiring stories and to consider how they, too, can make a difference in their communities. https://tonymantor.com https://Facebook.com/tonymantor https://instagram.com/tonymantor https://twitter.com/tonymantor https://youtube.com/tonymantormusic intro/outro music bed written by T. Wild Why Not Me the World music published by Mantor Music (BMI) The content on Why Not Me: Embracing Autism amd Mental Health Worldwide, including discussions on mental health, autism, and related topics, is provided for informational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed by guests are their own and do not reflect those of the podcast, its hosts, or affiliates.Why Not Me is not a medical or mental health professional and does not endorse or verify the accuracy, efficacy, safety of any treatments, programs, or advice discussed.Listeners should consult qualified healthcare professionals, such as licensed therapists, psychologists, or physicians, before making decisions about mental health or autism- related care.Reliance on this podcast's contents is at the listener's own risk. Why Not Me is not liable for any outcomes, financial or otherwise, resulting from actions taken based on the information provided. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Welcome to Why Not Me The World Podcast, hosted by Tony Mayator. Broadcasting from Music City, USA, Nashville, Tennessee. Join us as our guests tell us their stories. Some will make your laugh, some will make you cry. Real life people who will inspire and show that you are not alone in this world. hopefully you gain more awareness, acceptance, and a better understanding for autism around the world. Hi, I'm Tony Mantor. Welcome to Why Not Me the World.

Today's guest is Joe Jolati. He's here to tell us about his journey as an autistic individual working at the Prospector Theater and how it has transformed his life. He will also share his experiences and insights working at the theater and how it is. has impacted him. Thanks for coming on. Yes, thank you for having me. Oh, it's my pleasure. Happy to have you here. So tell me, when was you diagnosed autistic? I first found out when I was, I think I was about nine years old. And back at that time, I believe the term that they used was Asperger's. Right. And now it's just all part of the wide spectrum that is autism. Sure. So what year was that? I was nine years old, so that would have been 2003, I think.

Yeah, that makes sense. That would probably be the time that the doctors started putting the autistic label on that. Yes, I think that, as I recall, that's about right. Okay, so what are some of your childhood memories? When you was diagnosed, do you remember some of the things that you went through? That's an interesting question. didn't, at that time, I didn't think of it as a big disruption in my life. I didn't think of it as something that was really going to change very much. I was more aware that I was different than

others in a way that I hadn't really thought about before. Okay. When you say different, what's your definition of different? Because everyone's definition is, of course, different. That's a good point. As a kid, I struggle to pick up on certain social cues, and, And even to this day, I sometimes still am having a hard time with that. I'd like to think I've made significant improvements over the years, and I've had a lot of techniques to help me understand these things, that these nuances that might come easily to someone who does not have autism. Sure.

Okay. So what was your school years like, especially your primary and, of course, your middle school years? middle school was tough because I was different than most others occasionally I was singled out it was which was you know it was not fun one guy in particular we know I'm not going to mention his name obviously but he was you know he bullied a lot of people but I was always his you know his favorite and he was actually it's a little ironic because because of him I am I have grown a lot of thick skin and this kind of stuff that he used to bully me for doesn't bother me anymore because

now I'm in a place in my life where I am happy and I'm doing a lot of incredible work that he didn't believe that I would ever be able to accomplish. I almost welcome the my new possibility that one day while I'm working at the prospector he could walk in to see a movie. I would be tempted to look him in the eye and tell him, you were wrong. Look at me. Look where I am. Look what I'm doing. And look what I will continue to accomplish.

Yeah, that's great. So your middle school was a little tougher. How did that transition to your high school years? High school? Well, I went to John Reed Middle School in the Reading and Eastern community. And then I went to Joel Barlow High School for my first year. That was the public school in my town. It was not a good fit.

because the workload and the class sizes were just too overwhelming. It transferred to a smaller private school in Norwalk, Winston Predatory, where I graduated from. And that was a much better school because that was more tailored to, you know, everybody learns differently, especially people with disabilities. And I found while I was at this school, Winston Pratt, they tailored their style of teaching to fit individual students. There wasn't just one way of teaching. And I think that really helped me. Okay, so what are some, if you have any, of your positive things that come from your school years? I think when I started at Winston Prep, those are the years of school I really enjoyed because I was among people who were like me.

And I became really good friends with them. I would get involved in a bunch of extracurricular activities. I was part of like the fencing team. I was part of the rowing team. I did the theater productions every year. Well, I mean, I've been doing theater since, you know, middle school, but it was really at Western crap that it was the most fun. Once you finally got through your school years and out of high school,

did you have any plans or did you go to college at all? I did. I got into Norwalk Community College and I was there. That was a two-year program where I went on and got my associate's degree in graphic design. And it was while I was at Norwalk that I was. I started working at the prospector. Okay. You know, I would have my classes in the morning,

and then I would get out at 3 o'clock. I would drive back home to Ridgefield and start my work shifts at 4 o'clock. Okay, so how's the family? Did you get good support from them? And has that continued through now? Oh, absolutely. Good.

My mother is a doctor. My father was a psychotherapist. A lot of my family actually is in the medical field. My sister, she has her BCP. in psychology, I believe. She works with children on the spectrum. And then there's me, the one who did not pursue science or medicine. I went into graphic design.

Well, that's okay. There's nothing wrong with that. I love what I do. And the graphic design really came to be very helpful when I started at the prospector because shortly after I started there, I started doing embroidery. Okay. And actually, I have my embroidery machine here in my office, in my apartment. Okay, that's great. Tell us a little bit about the prospector. What happened there? How did you get there? And how did it develop for you?

Well, I started there. I first found out about it before they had officially opened. They were in the process of gathering more employees and gearing off for their grand opening. Okay. I had my job interview in mid-October of 2014. And I remember I went in for my job interview and I had a lot of artwork. with me that I art that I had done. Okay. Most of it centered around movies that I really like, like Star Wars, for example. I'm a big Star Wars fan. Okay.

And I had this artwork in my portfolio, a lot of the Star Wars artwork that I had done, I walked in and I met Brad, Eligamba, who is our head of HR, and I met like Santini, who at that time was our director of development. They both greeted me for my interview, and they were wearing Star Wars themed sneakers. Okay. I thought to myself, okay, this is a good sign. I showed them the artwork that I had done and showed what I could bring to the table, working at the theater with graphic design.

Because I would see all the, you know, all those posters that you see on the marquees at the theater basically showing, you know, what's coming soon or what's now playing? And I thought to myself, what if I could put together designs for these movies that we could then display, you know, as an idea that I brought to the table. So my interview went really well. they brought me back for a follow-up interview. I had some more artwork with me. I had this acrylic painting of Darth Vader that I actually just finished.

It was actually here at this follow-up interview that I met Val Jensen, our founder and visionary. I had just shown Brad and Mike this Dark Vader painting that I had done. And Val kind of poked in just to say hello, and I was introduced to her. They had me show her this painting that I had done. first words that Val ever said to me beyond just the high, how are you nice to meet you? First words she said to me when she saw that painting were, oh,

you're hired. Nice. I thought she was being nice. So we laughed. I thought she was being nice until at the end of the interview, they asked, would you like to work here. I said,

I would love to. And they said, well, welcome aboard. So that was for me really exciting. I had a job. I was in college. I needed a job to kind of sustain myself.

And I have one. I didn't know at, that time what it was going to lead to, but now I'm more aware of how impactful it is on the community around us and people with disabilities because it's really become something of a beacon prospector for people with disabilities who are looking for meaningful employment. And one of the moments that really I noticed it was really impactful in other people's lives. A couple of years ago, we hired a young employee with Down syndrome. And in working with her, since she's join. She has just the bubbliest personality. It was really when I saw her coming downstairs after

her job interview and she was really excited because, you know, she got a job. And then she walked out the front doors and her father was, had just pulled up into the driveway to breed her. And I could see her just jumping up and down, cheering really excitedly. You know, she ran over, she ran and jumped into her dad's arms and he hugged her. And that was a moment that I kind of realized, we are really having a a really big impact on people's lives that they are so excited to work here. And they love what the prospector can offer. Because, you know, when I first got higher before we even opened, I had no idea what it was going to lead to. I was just excited and happy to have a job. Sure. Sure. So how long have you been there? I started. My first day was October 29th of 2014.

I'm still there now. So I'm approaching about coming off on 10 years. That's awesome. way to go. How have you seen yourself develop over the years since your first beginning days of working there? I have really seen, looking back, I have seen that I've really grown in a way that I didn't expect. I started on the embroidery that we do there for the hats and the scars and all the stuff that we, the merchandise that we sell. Sure. Today, I'm running a small embroidery business out of my house. And it's just been something I never imagine doing. The art, the graphic design work that I've been doing has really been great at the theater. I'm also very much into into cosplay, which is coming to a big thing at the theater.

Whenever we have these big opening weekend events for big blockbuster movies, anything by say Marvel, Disney, Star Wars, anything like that, I would put together a costume and I would walk around the lobby as one of these characters from one of these movies. And it's really fun to interact with the guests who come in, especially the kids. For example, we had one of the Spider-Man films a while back, and the kids come in expecting to see Spider-Man on the screen. They are just blown away when they see Spider-Man walking around in the lobby, interacting with the kids, with their families, posing for pictures.

And that's just something I really love doing, because it's just so fun to see the kids get really excited about wanting to come in. Oh, absolutely. That's a really good thing. What is one of the things that you look at that's a major impact because you can see what is done by working there? By what you mean? What's one of the biggest impacts I've seen? Well, an impact that you've seen or maybe something this impacted you that happened only because you started working there.

Well, for one thing, when I first started, I was still living at home, but now I've since moved into my own apartment right down the street from the theater. Okay. And so, you know, I'm an independent homeowner, and not something I imagine I would have been able to achieve if I hadn't gotten the skills and just a better sense of confidence in myself from working at the theater. Sure.

Now, with any theater or any place that you were, once you start getting comfortable there and you have other people working around you that are comfortable, it can create a good friendship with those that you work with. So you mentioned that there was some people with disabilities that work there. So how has that changed, how you look at others, as well as how you look at yourself in trying to help those that you work with because, as you know, sometimes the outside world isn't quite as accepting in the first initial stages as you can be.

Oh yes, of course. Because, you know, the world we live in, you know, Reeve has come a long way in terms of inclusion and acceptance. But, you know, we still have a ways to go. Like working at the prospector and just seeing, I think it's the fact that, you know, we're all kind of in the same boat in that we all want to be accepted in this world. Despite the fact that we might have some differences from, say, other people, I found that there's this sense of, there's this really, this. excessive community at the prospector that that I haven't really seen much else places. It's just something that, how can I say this? It's like, you know how are you always hear people who say at this business, we're not just a business, we're a family. Right. It truly feels like that because a lot of these people that I've worked with, and I've been there since we open, so I've seen all the people that have come gone and the people who started around the time I did who were still there today. and it really does feel like a family because despite how different we may be, we're also very similar. And we have a lot of similar interests, a lot of similar passions, a lot of similar goals for life.

And I think it's very easy to coexist and get along with people who are very much similar to the way you are. In fact, there's often a joke I make among some of my coworkers who I've become really good friends with. Sometimes we'll get together outside of work. and with all the camaraderie that goes on between us, I sometimes just completely as a joke, I'll just say to them, you know, it's a wonder we managed to get any work done. The sense that, you know, that sense that, you know, when you work with friends, it could be a little distracting.

That is actually what strengthens us is that we're so coordinated and that we kind of balance each other out very well that it actually, in a way, it increases the productivity rather than causes distractions. That's awesome. When you can work in a place where the employees call each other family, that is just so good and definitely a plus. Oh, absolutely. In fact, you know, some people that are there, you know, their siblings work there. One of my coworkers, Andres, his brother, Santiago, joined recently. It could have been the other way around. I actually am trying to remember who

started first. I know one brother started there and then shortly after, the other brother joined shortly after. You know, it's a big community that comes together under one roof to, you know, achieve this mission that we have, which is, you know, to provide competitive and inclusive employment for people with disabilities. And it's not just the theater itself, but with the gourmet popcorn that we sell at the theater and on our websites. And it's just really just, you know, business is just skyrocketed. Oh, that's just so good to hear. So you've been working there For 10 years, you've grown in ways that you didn't think was possible. So what do you see in the next five years?

It isn't a little hard to think that far ahead, but, you know, when everything has had has been very consistent. But I think, I imagine five years from now, I may still be working there because I love what I do. And I love what I do because I get to do what I love. And I think that's what makes it so fun for lack of a more graceful term. Yeah. If you do what you love, it doesn't feel like work.

Exactly, exactly. So it's very fulfilling and very fun. That's so good. So now you talk about the family, the family of the people that you work with and have worked with. You've developed great relationships. So how about the other family, family that put this together? How's that work on a daily basis? You mean with the people that put the theater together?

Yes. I think, well, for one thing, I owe so much to Valerie Jensen, our founder of visionary, because she came up with this whole concept. She, at that time, before there was a prospector, she was, I believe the story was she had been working with an organization here in Ridgefield called Sphere. And her sister, Hope, who has Down syndrome, was a member of this group. And it was all these kind of activities and things that were put together for the members. of the group, many of whom are disabilities. And over the course of her time there, Val came to

realize that in between these activities, these individuals here had a lot of time on their hands, and they were saying, you know, they want to work, they want to have jobs, they want to earn paychecks. And Val was driving past the building that would become the prospector, which back in the 1940s was the original Ridgefield Playhouse. And then in the 70s, 80s and 90s, it was converted into a bank. In the late 2000s, or maybe it was like 2010, I don't remember the exact year, but Val was driving past that structure, which was going to be torn down to make additional parking space for the library. She was waiting at the stoplight, and she looked at the remains of the building in her rearview mirror, and it was like a light bulb went off, and she said,

I know what this town needs. This town needs a movie theater. And there's so many jobs that go into operating a movie theater and there's this untapped workforce just waiting to get to work. When I started, it was not like any job I'd ever worked before, which I technically consider it my first job. I had like a few brief employment bits that last very long. Prior to that, I worked for a few weeks at Party Depot, but it wasn't as enjoyable an experience. The prospector is just by far the best place I've ever worked. That's good. So how, What's your work week? Is it five days, six days? What do you do there? Well, I recently, last year I was promoted to full time. And my work week is anywhere from

35 to 40 hours a week. I work five days a week. Okay. I have Wednesdays and Sundays off. And I will work some days I might be working as an usher. I might be working on the cleaning through or I'll be helping out with service learnings, which we actually had one of those today. Schools or other organizations will reach out to us about bringing in groups to, you know, take a tour, learn about the theater, learn about what goes on there, come to see a movie. For example, today, Starsdale Middle School had a bunch of their eighth-grade class and some other teachers come in for a tour of the theater and then they went to sit down to the theater and watch a movie. Okay. So now you say people come in and do tours and

things like that. What has been from the time that you started and the time that they opened to now, how have you seen the business grow so that you can see the support from the community for what you're doing? Oh, well, well, the support from the community is one of those things that, you know, cannot be overstated. They have just, they lost. And even, and despite the fact we've been around so long, there are still people who come in who have never heard of us, which is actually, which honestly is great because it gives us a chance to, you know, tell them about what we do. And the people that, you know, that come in over and over again that, you know, love coming in, they just, they have such wonderful things to say.

And one of the things I actually hear most frequently from guests is when they talk about how much they love the prospector, they tell us they don't go to any other movie theater. They've just come to us. Nice. It's a little funny, but one of the, The biggest compliments we get is how to clean the place is, because our cleaning through is just top-notch. They really put in so much work to keep the place sparkly clean. In 2015, the New York Yankees actually came to the prospector as part of their hope week.

They were covering different organizations, spotlighting for the community, on their hope week, and they came to us. So that was very insane Because I'm a big Yankees fan We all went inside the theater For what we thought was going to be A professional development meeting But then they started on the screen And it was this thing that talked about

The Yankees Hope Week And then the side door opened And in-locked Joe Girardi And a bunch of other people from the Yankees Brian Cashman, Chase Hebbly A member of the Steinbrenner family And they talked about how impressed they were by everything we do.

They gave us a very nice, they gave us a very terrible donation. And then Valerie Jensen was invite, and a bunch of prospects, our employees were invited out at the stadium for the game that night. And Val got to throw out the first pitch. Oh, that's good.

That's amazing. And we've received a lot of support and a lot of praise. We've been featured on several news segments. In 2021, we were featured on Good Morning America, which was amazing. I was among the large number of prospects that got to speak on national television about the theaters. I think that was a really, a really amazing way to kind of just to kind of tell the public on a grand scale about what we do and how our work is important.

And how the people who work here are really important to society. We can work, we want to work, and we love what we do. And I think that was really important to be able to have that opportunity. Oh, it is. It is. I mean, that's awesome. Because when you can get national recognition like that, that takes it to a bigger scale to where people really will look at what you're doing and respect what you're doing. So this just goes to show you that those that are autistic and special needs can really step up and do what they want to do if given the opportunities to do so. So you're standing in front of 100 people, whether it be at the theater or wherever you might be. And they want to. want to know more about you and what autism is, what would you be telling them? I would say as far as I understand it, because, you know, I am still learning about this myself. It's something to do with the brain. It's my brain is wired differently than, say, a person who does not have autism. And it can, it's growing up, for example, I was very rigid in my way of

thinking I was resistant to change. I do pick up on certain social cues that would come easily to other people. Over the years, I've gotten much better at that. And there are things about my autism that have actually really benefited me. Like, I have a really keen eye for small little details that might otherwise be missed. And that really helped in my graphic design work and in my embroidery work, because if I'm able to focus, some of the smallest details I can increase the quality of my work.

And that's really been, I think, beneficial to everything that I've done. I'm glad that you brought up focus. Autistic people are well known that once they focus on something, they do not give up, they learn everything they possibly can about it, and then they just keep learning. Is that how you've been through your life as well? Absolutely. over the years I've come to find that's true if I'm locked in on something it can be very difficult to break me out of it which can be a tremendously great advantage at times but then there are other times where that could backfire in that it could leave me it could leave me for lack of a better term it could leave me blind to the world around me it's like it's like a blessing and a curse I guess but it has served me

very well overall because in my line of work, that's very important to be able to pick up on those small things that otherwise might be missed. So do you feel now with the way things are going, do you feel like you've hit your comfort zone where you really kind of hit your stride where you're satisfied with everything that's going on in your life? I would say so. Yes, I'm in an amazing, I'm working at an amazing job. I've got my own place. I'm, you know, I have a, you know, I'm in a very happy relationship. My girlfriend and I are celebrating, you know, we're going on a year and a half now.

And yeah, I'm very happy with where I am. Maybe 10 years ago, I never would have imagined any of this. So I owe a lot of it to the prospector, which is one of the reasons why I work as hard as I do is because I really want them to understand how much I appreciate the opportunities they've given me. That's awesome. That's great. So how do people find you? You must be on social media and have websites.

Oh, yes. Well, for information about the prospector and the movies that we show there, you know, if you're in the area, you want to come see a movie, you can go to prospector-theater.org. You can check us out on Facebook. We have a TikTok account. We are on

I believe we're on Snapchat, I think. We have our gourmet popcorn. You can go to prospector popcorn.org and you can order it from wherever you are in the United States and we will ship right to your door. That sounds just so good. So this has been a great conversation.

I've really truly enjoyed it. So thanks for coming on. All right. Well, Tony, thank you so much for having me on. It's been my pleasure. Thanks for taking the time out of your busy schedule to listen to our show today. We hope that you enjoyed it as much as we enjoyed bringing it to you. If you know anyone that would like to tell us their story, send them to tonymentor.com. Contact, then they can give us their information so one day they may be a guest on our show.

One more thing we ask, tell everyone everywhere about why not me the world, the conversations we're having and the inspiration our guests give to everyone, everywhere that you are not alone in this world.