Too Scary; Didn't Watch - DOUBLE JEOPARDY

Episode Date: March 4, 2026

Movie Intro @ 22:17Trivia @ 24:38Recap starts @ 27:21Follow the show: @TSDWpodcast on Twitter, TikTok, and Instagram.Check out our Patreon for bonus episodes and additional content!Rate Too Scary; Didn’t Watch 5 Stars on Spotify and Apple Podcasts and leave a review for Emily, Henley, and Sammy.Advertise on Too Scary; Didn't Watch via Gumball.fmSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a headgum podcast. This is Emily, Henley, and Sammy. And you're listening to Too Scary Didn't Watch. Hi, everyone. Welcome to Too Scary Didn't Watch, the horror movie recap podcast for those Too Scared to Watch for themselves. I'm Emily and I am too scared to watch scary movies. I'm Henley and I'm also too scared to watch scary movies. I'm Sammy and I love watching scary movies and so I watch them so that you don't have to.

And boy, boy, am I excited for this. week's episode. We got a fun one today. I really, I've been looking forward to it all week. Same. We need a little break, a little breather. Yeah. Yeah. Something for us. Something for us. And if you, dear listener, need that something for you. Immediately, you can jump to it using time stamps and the show notes. Because first, I think just a little bit of haunted housekeeping, I just wanted to quickly mention some of you may have noticed there was no new episode last week and you know nothing real crazy to report other than that it's just because we're all like extremely busy yeah and so we appreciate you sticking with us there may we may be taking an episode off here and there for our own

kind of crazy schedules right now so apologies it won't be forever but there may be a couple weeks in the next few months that we take off. So don't be alarmed. We're still going to be coming back. We're not going anywhere. We love you. We just are but mere mortals. And sometimes you got to make the hard choice to say, not today.

Not today. Today I can't. Also, we do, I mean, just to tease here, we do have some very exciting stuff coming up. So take the good with the best. bad, you know. Some breaks are a little sad, you know, but there's also a lot to look forward to. And we're not going to tell you what it is, but just trust us. Trust us. Okay, anyways, that's, that was all I wanted to say on the haunted housekeeping front. And now, as usual, I am going to ask both of you, Emily and Henley, did anything scary happen to you this week? To me specifically? Just me? What else could have

happened in the world. Something specific to just me in my life or anything scary to all of us forever? Kind of a lot to choose from in that second category there. Emily, are you going first or should I go first? I mean, I feel like I shouldn't. I feel like we should close with something small and stupid rather than start with something small and stupid and then say something real. Mine is not small and stupid.

Kicking off with something big and real. Say something real for us. Okay, okay. Say something real because there's a lot to choose from. Somebody's got it. A lot of topics. A lot of topics we could choose from. I'm going to pick one.

Okay. The thing that's top of mind for me is that we all need to be boycotting chat GPT. Everyone get it off your phone. This wasn't even one of the ones that. Not same. I'm like, wow. I had some other ones. Okay.

we need to not be using it, you guys. Not to brag, but I've literally never used it. I've never used any AI assistant. Well, I mean, other than the ones that I don't actively choose to use, like the Google that just pops up automatically, which I think you can turn off. But admittedly, I have not turned that off. And I do read it on occasion, but I will go on some sort of high horse here to say, I've never used chat, GPT.

Yes. I don't use it either, but I know a lot of people do. And I don't want to shame those people because I think there are probably good uses for it. Well, so this is what the context I want to give. So the big thing that just happened in the news is that Anthropic. The big thing. The big thing. One big thing. One big thing. One big thing. There's just been one big thing. Anthropic, which is kind of the competitor to open AI, like they're really the top of the AI game and they're competing against each other. Anthropic had a contract with the Pentagon. And Pete Hegseth just canceled it, canceled this billion-dollar contract

with Anthropic because the head of Anthropic kind of stood on his morals and said that they would not be using, they would not allow the Pentagon, the Department of War, run by Pete Hegseth, Fox News host, to use AI for autonomous weapons and mass surveillance of American citizens. Okay? Autonomous weapons meaning drones that would be used by AI. So Anthropic was like, we're not going to do that. And so they bowed out. They said no. And OpenA.

I got in there and was like, we'll do it. This is a rare moment of someone in power saying no to a lot of money. So I'm very like, great. That's so great. Literally within 24 hours, Sam Altman from Open AI, it's like, we'll do it. We'll do it. However, so here's the thing. They claim, Sam Altman claims that Open AI has basically signed this contract with the Pentagon Department of War, Pete Heggseth Fox, and his host, that they're with the same kind of like rules that Anthropic was going by before.

He's saying that they have not agreed to allow the Pentagon to use Open AI for autonomous weapons and mass surveillance of American citizens. Well, I'm going to take him out his word. This is what Sam Altman is saying. However, Sam Altman has a long history. a long history of line, lying over and over and over again. The co-founder of OpenAI had a huge article in the fall about how St. Malton has just lied.

They've had a lot of drama over there, yeah. Turns out you can, a lot of people are really using just lying forever as a step ladder to power and it's working on it. Nobody cares. You can just lie. Lai, Lyle, and we can all know it and we don't care.

We do care, though. We do care. It's crazy. The only thing we can do is like boycott JachyBTBT, like just get it off your phone because these are nefarious characters. Like they don't want what's good for us. Like they will use us to get like more power, more money. They're going to use our data. They're going to just anything you're putting into Jatch, EBT, they're taking.

I don't know what they could possibly use. me asking Chachabiti about astrological, you know, information about my, you know, my North node and stuff. But I don't want to find out. But they know too much about my astrological signs already. And yeah, it's just, it's scary. And I wanted to just voice it on this podcast in case anyone has missed this news, this thing that's happening to news. Yeah, that's true. There's no way to miss it.

It was the only thing that's the only thing. There's obviously a lot of other things going on right now. But this is something that could end up directly affecting us, depending on what happens. Like this is very serious. I mean, this is like the Department of War wanting to use AI to control drones that are weapons. And also to surveil all of us. So that's scary. That scares me.

And I don't trust Sam Altman. Sam Altman seems like a real piece of shit. His sister filed a court case that he sexually abused her when she was a child. It was like thrown out because his mom and his brothers claimed that she was lying. I personally think like pretty unusual for a woman to destroy her life publicly based on a lie. So again, those are just allegations. They haven't been proven in a court of law, but that there was, you know, that was an allegation against him. And that's just one thing in a long litany of things that make this person just deeply untrustworthy.

He's also donated money to the Trump campaign. He's clearly in the pocket of the Republicans willing to do whatever he wants to get as much power as he can. So that's at the rest of our expense. That seems to be the common theme right now with all the leaders. And I just really wish more of them could be more like Tommy Lee Jones from double. Jeopardy, but unfortunately. Spoiler. Sneak peek.

Yeah. So that happened wasn't really, honestly, wasn't really paying attention to that. I did really laugh. I just have to real quick say. Katie Perry tweeted like a screenshot of her Claude annual subscription, like signing up for Claude with like the caption like, done. Like I'm moving over to Claude. No more chat GPT.

She was taking a stand. Yes, which like really made me laugh as like, I'm not sure that this is the like thing that we're going to be applauding you for. She's like desperate to get on the right side of history. Yeah, she really wants to undo that. I went to space and it was the wrong idea. Oh, Katie. I went to space and I got some perspective on my life. Anyway, so that's my scary thing.

Yeah. It's a good one. That's a good one. Yeah, other ones are, if any of our listeners live in Kansas, oh, I'm sorry. And it's scary that that's not where this is all going to end. So, yeah, I'm just, yeah, it's scary. It's scary that we're just deciding who's allowed to exist. So brazenly, we've always done it, but we're doing it really, really brazenly.

And it's really scary and it's really sad. We also bombed Iran illegally did that. that Larry Ellison owns all the media that will ever consume. All the news outlets are going to be. All the movies. All the TV. Yeah. That's going to be tough.

I did today. Please tell us. Went to see Boslerman's newest Elvis movie, which is like documentary style. Oh, yes, I heard about footage of Elvis. I think I might. Mainly of Elvis performing, like intercut with other footage of him like rehearsing and some interviews and stuff. It was amazing. It was amazing. I was going to say, I think I would like this more than the other Elvis movie. Yeah, it was because so I fear what's scary is I fear I may literally never stop thinking and talking about Elvis Presley.

I already was a big, big fan. Our wedding, we only played Elvis music. Like we, Joel has been in an Elvis head. state of mind for many years. State of mind. But there's, I have not personally ever spent that much time watching him perform. Me either. You guys, I don't think there's literally ever been anyone as good a performer as him ever. Like, he is unreal. He is unfucking real.

It's making me realize I feel like I've seen so many people pretend to be Elvis Presley. but how much have I actually seen the original source? He is, I don't think anyone's ever had that much charisma. So much of his story is like so sad and there's so much and like, but just watching him perform is like close to seeing God. I like, I'm, I, it's, it's crazy. He's so good and he's so like doing exactly what he should be doing. and it is like so devastating that he was exploited to his death. But like watch, he's just like, it's just so it's, I'm.

He's in flow state. I'll never stop thinking about Elvis Presley. Wow. Also, like, he's just such a beautiful man and he just wore the best. Oh, the outfits. The best clothes, like clothes I'd never even conceived of. and oh talk about like a man you know putting out feathers and glitter and diamonds and doing the most got like that's like your kryptonite emily it's i truly i was like i made so i was like i need to watch

the eras documentary because i had this one where i was like well no musician or person has like literally ever worked harder than that was brusley and then i was like well i should maybe think about i don't like don't i was like maybe i have to maybe i'm into musicians now everything's It's really crazy. But I was like, there's one. I could start with Taylor. Because I was like, well, Taylor works pretty hard. And obviously, so do people who aren't white.

But I just, it's, I, I just, I just can't, I can't, I won't stop. I just won't stop thinking about him. I just won't stop thinking about him. I really don't know a lot about Elvis Presley. The main thing I know is that he married Priscilla when she was like 14. years old or something. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. There's a, there's a little bit of a sadness. There's, there is so much darkness. Yeah. In all, in his whole story.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like, it's actually like so sad. Um, and like I think, yeah, some troubling stuff that he's done, definitely some troubling things that were done to him. Really, really,

really, horribly exploited and, and like, drugged and worked and, like, taken advantage of. Um, like,

until he died at 40, two. Or did he, though? Is he still walking among us? If only... Oh, my God. We would feel it. But I also...

You know, I love Harry Styles, and I truly, at one point, in watching this, I was like, Harry Styles, you fucking hack. Like, I was just like, what? You wear, like, sparkly clothes and big pants, and you think you're... I was like, get you... Like, and again, it's not a competition,

but I was just like, there's literally no room for anybody else but Elvis, like, in my mind and heart in this moment. Okay. Guys, watch that fucking... Okay. Do you have to go to the theaters to see it? Do you have to?

Currently, I think you do. I think you currently have to. I doubt it will be in theaters for long. We also will absolutely be purchasing it on physical media. Yeah. It'd make a great... It'd make a great Marty Macs someday. But...

Yeah. It was glad to see it in a theater because it was like... It sounded so good. It looked so beautiful. I also just was like, man... And I get it because I now feel the same way. But I love that Bud Lundon was just like, I'm not done.

I'm not done without all. Elvis. There's more. And like it was better than the movie Elvis. Like it's because it's like it's actually fucking Elvis and it's crazy to see that man go to work. It's crazy. I didn't even know this movie existed. Thank you for telling me. This is the exact kind of movie I want to watch. It's so good. I'm electrified by Elvis Presby. Wow. So imagine being like a teenager in fucking 1950s who's never seen anything. like that then. They were screaming and crying. They, like, they show a lot of footage of the audience, and people are losing their fucking minds. Well, just the fact that you're inundated with media, you're inundated with content all the time, and you're having this reaction. These people were in a dry desert, thirsty, thirsty, thirsty. Dersie. Tartessertest. Parched. This is what I mean. There's never, I don't just, I just don't think there's, like, ever been anything like, like, I'm just, it's,

it's, I'm like, are people going to be really mad at me? Because I was going to say, as someone who doesn't really pay attention to music at all, I'm sure there is. I'm sure there is. And I'm like, you know, I'm sure you're going to be mad at me. I'm sure you're going to be mad at me. Guess what? I love Elvis. I won't back down.

I think a lot of people feel the same way you do. There are a lot of Elvis heads out there. We should all be. Sammy, anything's great to happen to you this week? Anything? Any one single thing? Any one single thing to me and me alone? Well, just to add on to the music thing real quick, just because it reminded me that,

stay, I bought tickets to see Rosalia. Sammy. Where? Tell me the details. In Inglewood, Kia Forum, as I was called. That sounds right. Yeah, Kia Forum. Yeah, something like that.

But it was because I saw her performance on the Brit Awards. My algorithm knew to show me that. Thank God. And it was of Brigain and Bjork was there. And oh my God, go watch it. It's such a good live performance that I was like, I got to see her live. And luckily, she's on tour. I'm sure it's going on tour.

So I'm pretty thrilled about that. So kind of scary, yeah, two girls who hate music. It's pretty wild stuff. It's pretty wild stuff. Everything's topsy-turvy. Everything's topsy-turvy. And the other thing I was going to say, which is just so stupid. And, you know, it's probably not happening to me and me alone. Has this been happening to you guys? I get like 10 texts a day

asking me to reset my Venmo password. Oh, no. That hasn't happened to me. It's happening absolutely constantly. And I googled it. This is happening to other people as well. Yeah. And it's like a fishing thing where it's like, give me your Venmo password. Yeah, where they're just like, have your phone number and they're going to just keep sending it over and over until you click that link and Venmo is aware of it and can't do anything about it. And it's just, I'm just like, I guess I just get 10 texts a day asking to reset my Venmo password now for the rest of my life. Like, I guess this is like my life now. That's so annoying. Can you block the number? I have blocked it and it comes from new numbers. Yeah. Of course. It's never ending.

I get nonstop spam messages, too. They're not from Venmo. But like the ones I've been getting recently, I'll have to do with the fact that I have Maryland driver's license. My Maryland driver's license is about to be revoked because of my unpaid tickets. Oh, I get a lot of like your Florida driving toll. Your son passed. You paid your son pass.

We're coming for you. And it's like, you idiot, I live in California. Exactly. That's why I'm like, okay, I haven't had a Maryland driver's license since I was 16 years old. Like this is not, I know this is fake. But that's another thing with AI. I mean, literally AI is just for like grifting and scamming. Like it's and for taking our jobs.

I'm sorry. I don't see how it's going to help any of us. And taking our brains, our ability to think critically. That's all it's doing. I listened to a whole fucking interview about AI with another guy from Anthropic who I was just like, fuck this guy has a British accent, which like makes him sound legitimate. And I was like, no, with Ezra Klein. And he was, you know, the whole, it was like an hour and a half of them circling the conversation about how it's going to take everyone's jobs.

It's going to take everyone's jobs. And this guy from Anthropic is like, well, policymakers, you know, policy makers, I've been in this policy debate for a long time. And, you know, legislators, as soon as they see that their constituents are going on unemployment, that's when, that's when the legislators, are going to, you know, really it hasn't been a point of conversation yet because, you know, people are not on unemployment yet. It's like, it's a spectacular British accent. It's, yeah, sorry, that was me doing his, like, his, not British accent, but that's how he sounded in my brain. I saw that Jack Dorsey laid off like half of whatever company he has right now and he, like, posted a public thing being like, just so everybody knows, like, this was because of AI. And people aren't

going to tell you that, but like, this is going to start happening everywhere. And I just want to be transparent about it. I just fired half of my company because of AI. In the next two years, it's going to affect so many people. And we'll see whether anyone does anything about it or not. But we need to have a revolution. I guess I'll give it quick plug to our friends' upcoming documentary. What is it called AI or how I became an apocal optimist or something like that. Yeah.

What a plug. I'm not sure the title. It is Daniel Rower. He directed a documentary called Navell. Valny and his next documentary is about AI. And I think it looks really good. It does look really good. But I don't, I don't feel good.

No, I don't feel good. About it. But I like learning more about it in the context of a documentary. Same. Who doesn't? So I can watch a movie about it, you know. It's contained. It's in a safe container within a documentary.

I need my information, spoon fed to me. Absolutely spoon-fed. fed. For those of you who don't know, that's a callback to a review we once got. Anywho. Okay, well, speaking of being spoon fed. Spoon feed it to me, Henley. Are you ready to be spoon fed some information?

Oh, my. That's all I ever want. Yep. All right. So we are doing double jeopardy. That's right, you guys. The time has come. We're doing double jeopardy.

All right. Any guesses what year this movie came out? out? 99. 1999. The finest year, the best year of cinema. What other year could it be? All my favorite movies came out in 1999.

Everyone's favorite movies came out in 1999. You at least, everyone at least has a favorite movie that came out in 1999. I will say that with certainty. Yeah. So double jeopardy. This was a big hit in my household just for me, just for me. Every time going to Blockbuster. You've never seen it?

Oh my God. I'm so excited. I'm not only if I never seen it, I like basically know nothing about this other than the concept of double jeopardy. Emily, music to my goddamn ears. How did you learn the concept of double jeopardy if not from this movie? That's a great question. I am shocked beyond belief you've gotten this far in womanhood without double jeopardy is a foundational film. It all changes today. It all changes today.

Oh my God, double jeopardy and Elvis in one day. I'm going to expose. I feel like this. like Jennifer Lopez in enough was like the same era and it was like and Catherine Zeta Jones in entrapment. Yes. Catherine Zeta Jones in entrapment. There was like a real sweet spot of women like, I don't know, thrillers, like light thrillers that a 10 year old could enjoy, for example.

But in the way that they can enjoy things without understanding anything that's really happening. No, like I'm, it's just vibes. I think they're pretty dark, actually. It's pure vibes. One thousand percent. Okay, and Sammy, so you know this movie. Yes, so I don't know if you'll remember, but I once read you guys excerpts from my childhood diary.

And on one day in 1999, I have an entry in my diary that just says today I saw Double Jeopardy and is the best movie I've ever seen in my life. See, yes. Yes. Oh my God, Sammy, there is a moment. There was a moment when our movie taste intersected for one day, for one day in our lives. One day in 1999. How beautiful day it was. Over double jeopardy.

So this movie has a 6.5 on IMDB, a 6.3 on Metacritic. Crazy. And then when we do Rotten Tomatoes, do we do the tomato meter or the popcorn meter? We do the tomato meter, baby. Okay. Who cares about the regular folk? Okay, well, we've got to critics only. The white male critics say.

The white male critics give this a 28% on rotten tomatoes. Okay, what do the plebs give it? 61%. Oh, okay. Better, but still wrong. Still wrong. I don't think I've seen this movie since 1999 for the record. Oh, I had rewatched it a few years ago with Tim, but then before that, I hadn't seen it

since 1999. And it holds up, you guys. It honestly, like, is one of the rare ones that it's, you know, we'll, we'll, We'll go through it, but like, it's enjoyable. It stars Tommy Lee Jones, Ashley Judd, Bruce Greenwood and Annabeth Gish. It's directed by Bruce Beresford and written by David Weisberg and Douglas Cook. Just some trivia for us. So Jody Foster was supposed to be the main character, but she was replaced by Ashley Judd when Joddy Foster became pregnant.

This would have been such a different movie if Jody Foster had been the main character. I just watched Panic Room again the other nights. I've never seen Panic Room. It's really good. Okay, so then we've got some classic 90 sexism going on. Despite playing the main character and protagonist, Ashley Judd took second billing behind Tommy Lee Jones. She also only made $1 million while Tommy Lee Jones made $10 million for a period in the film. That's a big gap.

Yikes. Really big gap. Also, he doesn't even show up in the movie until like 40 minutes into the movie. Yeah, my memory is like this is Ashley Judd's movie. She's in every single scene. There's not one scene she's not in. She's the vehicle for the movie. So this is very frustrating.

Also, Timely Jones played essentially this exact same character in the fugitive and U.S. Marshals, the fugitives in 1993, U.S. Marshalls, 1998. And every movie that he's ever done. Yeah. Just kidding. In which he attempts to go, blah, blah, I'm not going to give it. anything away because Emily doesn't know. Because I've seen the futuredives.

All right. I think that's, there wasn't a lot of trivia. So I think that's it for trivia. And I think we're just so excited. You guys ready for the recap? Yeah. Should we watch the trailer or is that going to be, is it going to tell me too much? It's going to tell you too much.

So we'll do it. We'll watch the trailer at the end. Great. I just got to get my eyes on it at some point, is what I'm saying. Oh, you will. You will. Okay. I love to online shop.

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It's spooky music. We've got sun rising on the water. All the credits are, it's called double jeopardy. All the credits are splitting in half, becoming double, if you will, double vision. Wow. So disorienting. Spooky music ends. We pull up. We're with Ashley Judd. Her name is Libby. I'm going to call her Ashley Judd probably most of the time. But that's perfectly fine. Libby, I'll probably say Libby as well. She's with her son Maddie. He's supposed to probably be two years old in this movie, but this actor, this child actor is like five years old.

Very interesting choice. Yeah. They're sitting on a rock in front of this stunning mantis. that's tucked into the woods. It's overlooking the water. We're on Whidbey Island in Washington State. Have you guys been to this part of the country? Like Bainbridge Island, Widby Island. I've been to Bainbridge. I've not. So Widby Island is just like north of Bainbridge Island. It's like the same vibe. Stunning. Heaven on Earth. Beautiful. I lived in Bellingham for a little bit, not an island, but kind of in the vicinity. Absolutely gorgeous. I saw a lot of bald eagles. It was like a magical place. It's so magical. I would love to live there. I would really love to live there. So we're in a beautiful

location. It's like pine trees, rocks, beach, clear water, sailboats, clear air, stunning. Pine trees, rocks, boats. Clear air. What else do you need? What else do you need? Nothing could go wrong in this setting. She is teaching her son how to fish. They're wanting. Finding a fishing rod. As you do a two-year-old. Yeah, two-year-olds, that's when you want to start them. She's barefoot. She's wearing a cream-colored cable-knit sweater.

She doesn't have any makeup on. She's gorgeous. Also, Ashley Judd is just like, undeniably one of the most beautiful people I've ever seen in my life. Like, just naturally beautiful people. Okay, Maddie, he's just got a crazy bull cut. Like, he's cute, but my God, the bull cut. super strong. She's saying, Maddie, look, look. And they cut to a shot of a beautiful sailboat going by. And she's like, that's the morning star. That's the most beautiful sailboat that exists

on would be island. One day when you're older, I'm going to teach you how to sail. It's the best thing ever. When you're three. And then they're joking around. She's saying, but maybe I don't want you to grow up. You'll meet someone and then you'll never sail with me. Who will I sail with. And he goes, Daddy. She goes, nah, he'll never sail with me. Cut two. We're at the same gorgeous mansion. Some time has passed. We're at a quintessential 90s cocktail party. The men are all in billowing neutral suits, neutral colored suits, you know, and the women are also all in billowing neutral colored suits. Like, yes, this is such a moment, perfect moment. Joel and I recently

Duncan had a casino-themed party Casino the movie themed party but also casino like a casino themed party Anyway, we were told to dress up like the movie casino and Joel and I both wore Big Cream suits And so I I feel like I know how this goes

They looked incredible by the way And we did stop at a liquor store on the way Over and as we walked in I was like We look crazy This looks like we're doing how Halloween when we are showing up somewhere together. But you were just either cosplaying as Hillary Clinton or you were from the 90s. Or Robert Gineer.

Or Robert De Niro, yeah. So we're getting an inside look at this house. There is an indoor swimming pool that's like in the foyer. I don't know. This house is insane. I want to know who lives in this house now. It's a real house. It's beautiful.

I don't know. Anyway, so there's this really crowded cocktail party during the day. we land on Nick. This is Ashley Judd's husband. He is the host of the party. He's also wearing a cable neck sweater, except this time there's a billowing neutral suit over top of it. Two men approach him at this party. They're going, hey, did you get the notice from First Seattle?

We've got a problem on our hands. Nick, he's brushing him off. He's saying, we don't have a problem. Like, these martinis are a problem. I need a new martini. And these guys are saying, no, I think we need to like pay attention to this. Nick, he's not bothered. He's like, it's not a problem.

Just enjoy yourself, you guys. Like, it's all good. Then we cut to another character. This is Angie. She is like kind of like an Ashley Judd look alike. She's carrying Maddie over to Ashley Judd, hands him over to her. They're laughing. Ashley Judd and her clearly good.

friends. She's going, have you been carrying him this whole party? And she's like, yeah, like, whatever. I love, I love doing it. And like, he goes, oh, Angie, we're never going to marry you off. Like, you're the best thing that's ever happens. Like, they're friends. They're joking of, you know, about marrying each other off as you do. Next, we are watching Nick. You know, we're still at this cocktail party. We see just a little scene of him schooling another guest on some artwork that on the walls. The guest is trying to impress his date by talking about how it's Picasso in his blue period. Nick, you know, strolls by and is like, it gives him the lowdown. Like, that's not Picasso. He's like, this is Kandinsky and this is 1911, the Russian blah, blah, blah, it says a lot

of stuff. Henley, what was the time that Tim knew who about who a bust was? This was. This was, this was, this was, this was giving Tim. This was a real. Giving Tim knowing who a bust was. This was when we were, Tim and I were at his parents' friends' very fancy house. And he had busts of people everywhere. And someone called one of them Pericles. And Tim was like, that's not Pericles, it's Theseus. And I was like texted you guys immediately being like, get me the fuck out of here.

I feel so uncomfortable. Everyone is like talking about fine art in a way. A fucking thing about paraclys or Theseus. So funny to recognize Theseus and differentiate between paracliens. That's not pericles. That's theseus. Which really makes like Tim sound like such an asshole. But Tim like is just such a-

I know. Sorry to throw you under the bus, Tim. No, Tim is just such a pedant. He's so pedantic. He's so pedantic. He's not trying to like one-up you. he's just trying to make sure everyone's on the same page. Because if we're going to have a conversation, we need to be clear it's not about Pericles.

When this comes up later and somebody mentions Paracly, everyone's going to be really fucking confused. Because it's not Pericles is Thetka. So I'm just trying to set the record straight so that we're all on the same page. Because later this is going to get nuts. Like I won't be able to live with myself. I'll be going to bed at night and I'll be thinking,

everyone still thinks it's Pericles. Everyone still thinks it's perfect. What conversations were we had and we were standing by Pericles? And it's like, we were never searing by Pericles. We were standing by Precii is like, this is, This is crazy, you guys. Well, I'm like running away. We're living in two different realities.

So, I love you, Tim. I love you, Tim. I love you, too much. Nick is not like Tim. Nick is not just a pedant. He's also kind of a blowhard. He's being a dick. But he's also very smooth.

Like, he's, you don't really, you don't really notice it right away. Like, he's very charismatic. Also, I just looked it up and want to throw out there that Bruce Greenwood, who plays Nick, is Gerald in Gerald's game. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He is smooth. He's very good at playing this guy. Yeah, that's like, he's in a lot of things. He's got such.

He's a that guy. This vibe. He is a that guy. He's totally a that guy. I don't know. I can't remember what else he said. I meant to look that up, but I don't even know. what else he's been in. But you look him up and you're like, I've seen him in a thousand days.

I was going to say it's too much. I couldn't even list. The list is too long. The list is too long. So the next thing we see this charismatic man do is casually leap up onto a wall to give a speech. Onto a wall. This is on the deck outside. He's, you know, clinking a glass. He's saying, welcome everyone. You know, the point of this party is to support the small. Fri school. So it's the fundraiser. He's saying everyone, it's time for you to ante up. It's time for you to donate. He's introducing the headmistress to say a few words. Of course, he says, you know, the ravishing headmistress who couldn't be cuter. Like he, like, he, like, says some derogatory things about her looks, but she loves it because, like, you know, he's so charismatic.

Angie and Ashley Judder watching this, and Angie scoffs. And she's like, he's so insufferable. And Ashley Judd is like, don't I know it? She's holding her son. But she seems content, super happy. We find out that Angie is a teacher and head of admissions at this small fry school. And that's kind of the end of the party. Then we cut to later the party's being cleaned up. The caters are leaving.

Everyone's going home. Ashley and Nick are just making out outside on the deck. They're so in love. They love each other. So much. A lot of, you know, sweet little banter back and forth. He's smoking a cigar. While they're making a cigar. It's like he's holding a cigar. Angie casually walks up to them, interrupts them making out. Weird. Nick is like, Angie, should we break the news to her? And she says, I suppose it's better. She hears it from us instead of someone else. So then Nick

says, close your eyes to Ashley Judd. Ashley Judd's like, what are you doing? What are you talking about? He covers her eyes and then he dances her across the deck. They dance across the deck. And then with her eyes closed, he says, now Libby, her name's Libby, not Ashley Judd in this movie. Now Libby, what is your favorite thing? And opens her eyes. Sailboat. The morning star, the sailboat, sails across her vision.

Everybody's favorite thing. She's a vesselhead. She's a vesselhead. She's on our side. She's on our team. She's one of the good ones. She's one of us. And she's shocked.

She says, Nick, no. And he says, the owner agreed for us to take it out for the weekend. And if we like it, it's yours. She's like, honey, we can't afford that. What are you talking about? Nobody should be able to afford that, I think, personally. He says, has that ever stopped us before? And she goes, what about Maddie?

And Angie goes, I'll take care of him. It's fine. We're going to have so much fun. You guys go. And then she turns to her husband. And she goes, you hate to sail, which is like what the comment from the beginning to her son was about. And he goes, I can learn. I'm not going to murder you on this still.

And she smiles and she's like, okay, great. I'm going to learn to love to sail is what I'm going to do. Didn't even cross my mind to kill you and replace you with a woman who looks just like you. The strings swell. We get a drone shot of abuse. beautiful sailboat out at sea. And Ashley Judd is, again, absolutely stunning. She's just wearing a bikini top, a bandana around her hair.

She's at the helm of the boat. She's at the steering wheel. She's so confident. Is it daytime after this party ended? Yeah, it's still daytime after this party ended. They had a daytime fundraiser for the Small Fry School. That's what you do when you're a gazillionaire. Yeah, yeah.

And you're a part of the community. What's the word? You're the school board. You're the star of the community. You're the leader of the community. You're a, you know. You're the, you're a mensch. That's what his whole vibe is.

He's a mensch. He's a mensch. So, you know, he comes out from under the boat. He's cracking open a bottle of wine. And he goes, wait, where's the land? And she's laughing. And she says, well, Alaska's to the left. Japan is straight ahead.

And Australia is somewhere to the left. Where would you like to go? He looks at her and he says, bed. Then she goes, that can be arranged. Then they have very hot, very intimate sex, a sex scene that is reserved again for the 90s in the early 2000s where we don't see her boobs, but like it's pretty graphic. And they're really in love. They're really having.

Of course they are, both of them. They're really having the time of their life. The right intentions. Yes. Nobody's tricking anyone. Nobody's tricking anyone. Everything is good. Could they have sex like this if they weren't in love?

They're so in love. I've never seen it. Never seen it before. However, next thing. Oh, no. What? We cut too. What?

Something changes. Something changes. Ashley Judd wakes up in the dark, alone. It's the middle of the night. She hears banging, clinging in the distance. She says, Nick, Nick? She just kind of gets up. He's not in bed with her.

She looks down. Her hands covered in blood. Her bathrobe? Covered in blood. She's shaking. She's looking at her hands. She's going, Nick, Nick? She stumbles out of bed.

She sees blood on the floor. She sees blood in the kitchen. She's kind of like getting her bearings. Of the house or the boat? The boat. She's on the boat. She follows these bloody footprints through the hull. Through the hall.

Up the ladder onto the deck, keeps following the bloody footprints. The bloody footprints go straight off the boat. And that's when the strings really swell. She's going, Nick, Nick, Nick. And then she sees a knife on the ground covered in blood. She picks it up. She holds it up. Gets those fingerprints all over it.

She's going, oh my God. Oh my God. Oh, my God. Just in that moment, Coast Guard boat pulls up, lights blaring. In a way that couldn't be planned. This is the Coast Guard. Put the knife down. Step away.

She starts having, you know, a little panic attack. She's like, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know where my husband is. Cut too. These days, I'm all about quality of her quantity. especially in my closet. If it's not well-made and versatile, it's just not worth it to me. That's honestly why I love quince. The fabrics feel elevated, the cuts are thoughtful,

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The U.S. Coast Guard is coming back. They've been looking for her husband all night. The sheriff goes, Cutter goes to talk to him. Looks like there's. is not good news. He comes back. He says to her, like, they haven't found anything. They're not finding him. And she's saying, Cutter, please, please don't let them give up. He's very strong.

He's a very strong man. He can get through this. He can get through this. And he's saying, Libby, the raft and life preservers are all on board. The water temperature overnight was 51 degrees. I don't think that it's not like you. Probably stabbed. Exactly.

Somebody was maybe stabbed. She starts having another Panic connection saying, I can't breathe, I can't breathe. He helps her. She puts her head between her legs, which is,

is this what you do? Like, does putting your head between your legs really help? I've definitely seen it. I've never personally employed that tactic. It seems counterintuitive.

It seems like it wouldn't work, but I guess it must. If it's on TV, it must work. It must. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They wouldn't put it on TV. They wouldn't put it in a movie

if it wasn't real. So sometime later, she's on the beach in front of their house. She's with Maddie. He's skipping stones. The police pull up. For a two-year-old is. I know. Pretty good. It's very impressive. They're actually skipping? No, he's not actually skipping them. He's just picking some stones up. Took me a long time to perfect. You're right. I should not give him that quality. How dare I? He's throwing rocks in a lot. He's throwing rocks. Thank you. Anyone can do that. Thank you. He's throwing. Rocks. A bunch of police get out of the sheriff's truck, including one man that we recognize from the cocktail party. This is Bobby. He's a lawyer. He is with Sheriff the Cutter, the Cutter,

named Cutter. He says, Cutter asked me to come here to talk to you not just as a lawyer, but as a friend. They've reviewed all the evidence, and Nick has been officially declared dead. And Libby, they've determined it was a wrongful death. And you are being formally charged for his murder. Make no statements to the sheriff. And she's like shocked by this. She's like, she starts laughing. And she's like, what are you talking about? Like, what? And then Cutter takes out the handcuffs. And she goes, cut her. Not in front of my kid. Okay. Next. We got Ashley Judd in a jail cell. Oh, boy. She's still in all neutrals, still absolutely gorgeous in the jail cell. Bobby comes back. He tells her she's been denied bail. He asks, can Angie keep looking after Maddie?

She's in shock. She's like, can't speak. She's just like, yeah, okay, yes. Fair enough. Yeah, that would be a tough situation for sure. Yeah, really bad series of events. really unexpected for her. She did not see any of this coming. And then she starts, eventually she starts talking. She's like, Bobby, okay, here's what I think happened. I had some wine. I must have fallen asleep. Nick, he must have tried, we must have snagged a line or something. And maybe he got the knife to try to cut something because the knife from the galley, it was on the deck. And then the boat pitched. And then maybe he cut himself and as she's like trying to explain it, she can't. She starts crying.

She noticed there are cigarettes in his bag. She lights one. And then Bobby, the lawyer, is like, did you know that Nick had taken out life insurance policies on both of you four months ago? And she was like, yeah, he wanted to make sure that me and Maddie would be okay if anything ever happened to him. he's like they're for $2 million. The jury is going to think it's pretty strange. There's a big difference between being okay and $2 million. The jury is going to think it's a little odd.

And they may see it as a motive. And she's like, $2 million in 1999. I was going to say. It's like, $2 million, that's it. She's like, that's twice as much as I got for making this fucking movie. Yeah, fucking excuse me. Yeah. So she's indignant, though.

She's like, are you telling me that they're going to think I killed Nick for money? That's insane. We had problems, but we were okay. We were fine. We didn't have money problems. And he's saying, well, two of his investors were suing him for embezzlement. And the first Seattle had put a lien on all of his real estate properties, including your house and your personal possessions. So Nick's death means that all of these problems disappear and leave you with $2 million.

She's taking this all in. She's like, fuck. Yeah. Seems bad. If I had planned to do that, that makes sense as to why I would have. This actually makes a lot of sense. She says, do you think I killed him? He lights a cigarette and says, no, of course I don't think you killed him.

At this point, I don't really know whether he means that or not, but I don't know. Have they, like, tested the blood and stuff? Yeah, they tested the blood. It's his blood. Okay. It's his blood. So then we have a trial that lasts about, you know, 45 seconds on screen. Murder trials are always really quick.

Yeah. It's a lawyer, female lawyer. Especially with nobody. Female prosecutor who's going real hard. She's holding up the knife in a plastic bag. Sure. Blood fresh on the knife. Yeah.

It's like, blood fresh. It's like, I'm going to dry. A blood fresh knife. It's like wet in the bag. It's like, that's not.

That won't work. The blood won't dry. That's how bad this murder was. That's how fresh the blood is. And then the other thing that's revealed in this trial, they play a tape that's Nick calling the Coast Guard saying, I mean, Mayday, May Day, I've been stabbed. Like, help me, help me. I've been stabbed. Like, I don't have much longer.

It was my wife, I think. He doesn't say that explicitly, but like, help, help, help. It's my wife. She won't remember this. But I think, but it was definitely her. Ashley Judd takes the stand. She's having another panic attack. She's like, I didn't kill my husband. I loved my husband. You have to believe me. You have to believe me. She's sobbing. She's way out of her depth here. No one believes her. she's going to jail, she's going to prison. There's a scene where she's sitting in a police station. Everyone is lit from above. Absolutely gorgeous. Angie is there. While Maddie's playing oblivious in the corner,

she's calm now. She's saying to Angie, I'd like you to adopt my son. Maddie loves you. Maddie is complete, like Maddie adores you. We can't let him become a ward of the state. As she mentions, like,

I barely escaped my son. parents' house. I'm not sending him there. Angie at first hesitates and then agrees eventually. She says, thank you. She has this moment with Maddie where she's like, you're going to go stay with Angie for a while. And then when all this is over, we'll be together again. Like, I promise we'll be together again. And you're going to have so much fun with Angie. Maddie is, you know, a five-year-old child actor. Playing two, though. Playing two with a bull cut. That's all we got from him. Then, cut two.

She's in jail. Ashley Judd. She's in prison. Prison. I was going to say. Probably. Prison. She's in prison.

Probably the big one. Yeah. Yeah. She's in the lockup. In the dog house. The dog house. She's in the dog house. She's in the dog house now.

Maximum security. Everyone's really mad at her and they put her in the dog out of it. She is sleeping top bunk, which I think is like preferable. I don't know. Top bunk, huge room. Oh, interesting. Tons of women. Not sure how the power dynamics work in that.

Do we all think top bunk is preferable? Oh, you're speaking like prison. In prison terms. In prison terms. Is it because of it's like a dominance thing? Yeah, dominance and then also like slightly more privacy, kind of. Maybe. You know what I mean?

I like a bottom bunk. I like to feel like I'm in a cave. Personally, what do you guys like? And the top bunk scares me. I don't want to roll off. Yeah. I think I prefer a bottom bunk as well. Yeah.

Yeah. I do too. I fell off the top bunk and. Oh, you did? That's a pretty far way to go. Yeah, I didn't wake up. I was a kid and I fell off the top bunk and my mom ran in and found me on the floor still sleeping and I had bruised a rib.

It was. shit. Really painful the next day, but it didn't wake me up the night of. Wait, how old were you when that happened? I'm a good sleeper. You probably felt like so limp too. Yeah. I think it was like eight. Wow, that is a remarkable. You are such a good sleeper. Yeah. Is this like your sleep apnea kicking in somehow? Yeah, maybe it starts. Maybe. Perhaps you should wake up when you fall from a top bunk. It seems like, yeah. Probably. Probably good. You could really get double jeopardy if you sleep that hard. Yeah. Yeah. Let's put a piece. pin in that and circle back to it later. So she's in the doghouse. Now she's got a huge white

t-shirt on and she wakes up to a siren. That's how they wake them up. Siren, that seems unnecessarily cruel. Tons of other women. Two other prisoners approach her bunk. This is Margaret and Evelyn. I think Evelyn's actually on the bottom bunk. Margaret asks, who's this? And Evelyn says, Rich bitch from Woodby Island. And then she said, she's not going to make it.

And they say five cartons says she offs herself inside of six months. Ooh, Jesus. And she goes, get away from me. And they go, hey, we're your new best friends. Margaret says, heard you did your husband. Probably deserved it. And then Evelyn says, mine did. These are her new best friends.

Nice, yeah, okay. These are new best friends. then there's shots of her doing you know manual labor cleaning a bathroom hanging in the prison yard she at one point talking to Maddie and Angie Angie has brought Maddie to visit her through the you know the phones glass ball Angie's saying I taught him the ABCs this is how you know he's two and not five because they should know it by five by five for sure so he's pretty easy for five-year-old actor to do that right exactly exactly Exactly. So he's singing the ABCs to her. She's putting her hand up. It's very sad and sweet. Then cut to shots of her at the phone. There's like a public phone. They all have to wait in line to do calls. And it's her like calling Angie, calling, calling, calling her not picking up, her not picking up. And everyone like behind her in line being like, yeah, you got to move on. Like we need the phone. Just calling Angie. No one's picking up.

up. Then it's her crying on the top bunk. Evelyn hearing her cry, looking a little worried. Eventually, she's out. She's alone. She's in the prison yard. Margaret and Evelyn approach her. They're like, we hear you can't find your boy. And she says, I don't know. She just disappeared. How much time has passed? How long have we not? Not long. Like, not long. It's probably been like a few months or something. at this point, which is, I guess, kind of long, but like... Long to not know where your son is. Yeah.

And Margaret and Evelyn are like, use your head, think. Like, think. She couldn't have disappeared that easy. Where did she go? Like, there must be a way for you to find out where she went. Just think, think. And so then cuts to Ashley Judd calling the small fry school. She pretends to be Angie.

She says, hi. talking to the headmistress, hi, how are you? It's, yeah, it's Angie Green. Like, I just, I haven't gotten a severance check from you guys in a while. I wanted to check to make sure you guys had my right address and phone number. And so then, like, the woman from small fry school just gives her the address and phone number. It's in San Francisco, not in Whidbey Island. So she immediately calls the number that they give her. She quickly dials it. Angie picks up. And she's like, Angie, where are you? I've been trying you. Where have you been? Angie's like, startled. She's in Sam's his going. She's getting it away. Laying her cards on the table that quick. I feel like,

she doesn't know yet she's being double jeopardy. She doesn't know. She's still like, she thinks that there's like a misunderstanding. She thinks that or maybe she thinks that like, Angie thinks she really did it and like is trying to like protect Maddie or, I don't know what her thought process is here. I don't know. And she goes, she can hear Maddie in the distance. So she's like, put Maddie on, put Maddie on. And Angie's going, I was going to call you. We just, we were going to come see you next week. Like, I promise. We just, we, everything, you know, she's trying to cover her ass.

And then she puts Maddie on the phone because she feels guilty. And Maddie's like, hi, mommy, like, miss you. I don't know. And then the door opens and in Woxnick. Yep. Mm-hmm. And Maddie goes, Daddy. And Ashley Judd goes, Nick, Nick?

And then everything slows down. Like the film like slows down. And she just hears Maddie going, Daddy, Daddy's home. And Angie being like, she's on the phone. Does he like, does Nick speak when he comes in? He doesn't say anything. But Ashley Judd knows. She knows.

She knows that it's him. He wouldn't say daddy like that if it wasn't actually daddy. It's daddy. Because also not that much time has passed. Like, again, she hasn't been imprisoned that long. Be excited about a new daddy. Yeah. And then Nick just walks over and like pulls, unplugs the phone.

And she probably should have done that herself. Just hung up. Yeah. And Ashley Judd immediately tries calling back. Like the line gets cut. She tries calling back. The line's cut. It's not.

It's just beep. Beep, be, peep, peep, peep. And so then she, like, really knows. She's like, okay, like, fuck. And so, again, everything slowed down. Ashley Judd, like, zoom in on her face just like, and then Ashley Judge is, like, walking through the prison with, like, everyone, like, moving around her while she's just, like,

walking through just being like, whoa, what the fuck? I mean, that would suck. But honestly, it would suck less. I think it sucks less than being there because you killed him and, like, you forgot. Yeah. You killed him and you forgot. Yeah. You slept through it. You know what I mean? If you're like, although I mean it would suck to like know you'd been framed.

I'd be really mad. I'd be so mad. Well, that's why this movie is so good. That's literally why this movie is so good. Yeah. We'd be mad. If you were in her shoes, we'd be really mad. We know that we can imagine that we'd be pretty pissed off. Oh, yeah. And I can't wait to keep going because I'm already like, like, oh, okay, the whole thing is like double jeopardy. You can't be, you know, you get to kill him now because you already, but I actually like, that wouldn't hold up, right?

Because it's like, well, no, but he was alive and then you did kill him. So it's actually a separate murder that we could charge you for. That was some of the trivia that I didn't want to say because Emily, you really didn't know anything about the movie. I would have said it if you'd like seen it before. But like, yeah, there's so funny. That's like, that's not double jeopardy. It's definitely not.

Two different crimes. Yeah. And no. One is a real murder for real. Yeah. Like, you might have a lighter sentence, but like, yeah. And also, again, I'm not a lawyer and I was just looking at IMDB trivia, which certainly shouldn't be looked at for legal advice.

But there's some stipulations about, like, being tried within a specific state. So, like, you have, like, the state. Right. It's also like it's state of California or wherever they end up going. Yeah. And, you know, I'm not trying to, like, Henley this whole movie and, like, you know, but, like, but, you know, like, I. I can imagine that's where we're going here.

Then figure out a way to probably try you for the murder. They could probably try you for it. If they found out that he was actually live and then you did it for real, they'd be like, well, okay, but now you, sorry, we messed up the first time. That's on us. But this time you did it for real. And so now we got it. It's a new crime.

So also I just want to know, have we met Tommy Lee Jones yet? No. But I think whatever he's yet to do is worth $10 million. $10 million. Not having you seen it? I think whatever's coming. 10 million dollar performance. So she does what I think is very smart.

She immediately the next day she calls the insurance company. And she's like, he's still alive. Like, don't you want your money back? Like, don't you want to invest? Like, he stole money from you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He took your money. He's still alive.

Aren't you going to investigate? They're like, bitch, we don't give a shit. They don't listen. Oh, because it would have gone to Maddie. I guess so. Yeah, it would have gone to Maddie. Yeah. In a trust, in a trust to Maddie.

Because it's like he can't be like Thank you for the checks And who do I make these checks out to? Oh me! The one who was murdered Yes, they all go to the two-year-old So she's frustrated Christmas time rolls around

She's stirring a big old vat of tapioca pudding In the kitchen Prison kitchen I really got a craving for rice pudding today So good Margaret approaches her and she's like, hey, like, you're in prison. Don't you get that? No one listens to anyone in prison. So you can just forget about reopening your case or getting a jailhouse appeal. They're 95% unsuccessful. You just have to do your time. And Ashley Judge is like,

what are you, a lawyer? And she goes, once upon a time, but they tend to disbar murderers. and she comes up to her real close. And she goes, here's your Christmas present. Pay attention because it's the best goddamn advice you're ever going to get. You ever hear of something called double jeopardy Fifth Amendment to the Constitution? The state says you already killed your husband. They can't convict you of it a second time. That means when you leave here, you can track him down and kill him.

But which state, Washington or California? Exactly. You ever hear something about double jeopardy Fifth Amendment to the Constitution. you walk right up to him in Times Square pull the trigger and there's nothing anyone can do about it.

Pretty sure people could do something about it if you murdered him in public with the gun. Just can't be possibly be true. Maybe you kill him in secret because nobody knows he's alive then how can they try for killing a man that they get in?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But don't shoot him point blank in Times Square. Movie magic, movie magic. Sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, it's a fun. It's fun.

It's fun. It's a thought. It's a fun thought. Sure. And then she says, kind of makes you feel while warm and tingly inside, doesn't it? And Ashley Judd is like, yes, it does. So. But like, how long is a murder sentence in prison? Probably pretty long. Well, so we cut to a workout montage. This was my

favorite part of the movie. This is my favorite part of the movie when I was 10 years old. It's still my favorite part of the movie. I was going to say, I feel like, again, Jennifer Lopez is enough. I think there was some of this in there as well. It's probably 30 seconds long. Time to get strong to kill my ex. I'm fucking love it. I'm like, go, go, go, you got this. Maybe this is my workout. This is what we need to be motivated. Yeah. Watch this scene like every single morning. She's lifting weights. She's doing pull-ups. She's running laps in the prison yard in the pouring rain while Evelyn smokes a cigarette cheering her on. And she yells, I got a hand it to you, honey. It's just sheer hate driving you on. And I'm like, Yes, go, Ashley Judd.

So then time passes. Ashley Judd's hair. It's longer. That's how you know. She's like prison is old half for her now. She's working in the hair salon. She's giving haircuts. She's telling it like it is. An inmate hands here a photo of a model from a magazine.

Ashley Judd looks here and she goes, honey, the only way you're going to look like that is if I staple the picture of your forehead. He goes, just trust me. Okay. So she's, you know, no nonsense down. Then Evelyn, the woman who called her a rich bitch from Wouldby Island, she comes out around the corner. She has a cake, homemade cake, candles on it. She goes, it's Maddie's eighth birthday. And the inmates all stop. That's why he was five. Yeah. So that's why it's confusing because, like, he's definitely five years old, but he's supposed to be two because six years have passed. He's eight now. Same actor? You'll see. She flows out the candles. Everyone's cheering, including Margaret, who's next to her, cutting other people's hair. Then she's walking the prison yard with Margaret, who's coaching her.

She has a parole hearing coming up. She's telling her exactly what to say. Ashley Judd is saying, like, I'll say, like, I've grown a lot these past six years. And Margaret is like, no, they don't give a shit if you grow or not. They don't care if you're a tree. Listen, you're going to copy me exactly. Repeat after me. If I could trade places with my husband, I would, but I can't.

And then you transition to her into this parole hearing. She's saying exactly what Margaret told her to say. And it works. She gets out of prison. Wow. So she's been in prison six years. She gets out. But she is on conditional parole.

So next we see her carrying a cardboard box and a crowded street. She's getting cat called, walking up to this dilapidated building. This is the halfway house where she's going to live for these next three years. And this is where we finally meet the man, the one and only, Tommy Lee Jones. He is the hard-charging, tough-talking, no-nonsense parole officer. For the next three years, she's supposed to live in this building. She's supposed to find employment. There are all these rules.

He's, you know, she walks into his office. There are papers everywhere. There's an old TV. He's, like, drinking something definitely seems like he's a drinking scotch. There are people everywhere. It's kind of chaotic, but he's very serious. He's like, curfew is at 8.30 p.m. Here's my cell phone number.

If you think you're going to be even five minutes late, I'll have you picked up. If you violate any of my rules, if you violate any of these conditions, you'll return your get out of jail-free card and go back to prison. finish out your sentence and maybe more. Then he, like, looks in her box and picks out a photo of Maddie that she's been holding on to. He looks at it. He goes, is this going to be a problem for you?

She's like, no, sir, it's not. He goes, I don't believe you. She goes, it's not. I promise. And he's like, I don't give a shit about your contrition. Like, just don't make any problems for me. Get out of here. Behave yourself.

So she's like, okay. Sure. She's not going to behave herself. Spragile alert. She's going to kill her husband. I think I'm going to kill her husband. She's like, sure. It's her thing.

Then we get a scene in the library where she's on a computer tapping away. A kind of shmarmie young man approaches her. And he's like, hey, like, you're not going to get anywhere fast that way. Like, let me help you. What are you trying to do? She's like, I'm trying to find an old friend of mine. He goes, a boyfriend. She goes, no, my girlfriend.

She goes, someone told me to use the internet. He's like, oh, yeah, let me help you. Don't do it, Ashley. So it's going to be AI before you know it. And he like helps her search for Angela Green while they're waiting for the results to load. You know, he's like, hey, you want to go get a drink? And she goes, sure, I just have to check in with my parole officer first. The results are going to take that long to load.

You have time to get a drink in between? Oh, those were the days. And he goes, you're a parole officer. What? Unpaid parking tickets? She goes, I was convicted for murdering my husband. And he's like, bye. She's like, see ya.

Okay, see you later. And he leaves, the internet finally loads. Angela Green, over a thousand hits. It's no dice. It's too many options. She's back to square one. That night, she's back at the halfway house. She watches Tommy Lee Jones put his money where his mouth is and he's having a woman arrested.

It's clear that there are no second chances in this house. If you fuck up, he is putting you right back in prison. She's asking the other women there like, what's the dude's problem? Why is he like this? And one of them says he used to be a law professor, but he got a DUI and totaled his car and He hasn't seen his wife or kid in years. So that's Timmy Lee Jones's sad backstory. Okay.

The next day, Ashley Judd goes to Whidbey Island. She goes straight back to that small fry school. She goes to the headmistress and she's like, listen, I really need to find Angela. I need to find Angie. Please, can you help me? I really need to find her address. Like, can you just tell me where she went? I want to find Maddie.

The headmistress, not helpful at all. She thinks she killed her husband. She's not going to help her. She's just like, no, you have to leave. Like, please get off the property. Yeah, I mean, reasonable. Yeah. So she waits until nighttime.

It's definitely past her curfew. She waits until nighttime. And she sneaks into the school. She gets inside the administrative office. Immediately the police come. I guess that one of them is like, it's probably just a school. squirrel, I guess they got alerted there was a break-in. We got a lot of tense, tense shots of her,

you know, trying to get into the filing cabinet, trying to find the keys to the finally cabinet. The keys are in the back of the filing cabinet. She gets them finally. She's sweating. She's sweating. She has a flashlight in her mouth. The police are coming. The police are coming. Ah, will she get it? Will she get it? They're coming in. They're coming in. And she opens it finally. Ah, they're coming to close her. She gets the information that she needs. They're right on her tail. they see her just in time, but she gets the information. She shoves it in her pants and then she leaps out the window. But the police are, you know, they see her. So now the police are chasing her. There is a long, yeah, there's a long chasing like through the sand dunes. It's such a long

dramatic chasing, you guys. That's actually very funny. It's almost like Ashley Judd had to run through the sand dunes so much. It's a poor Ashley Judd. This was too much. They did not need the scene. The scene is completely... Who'd have another million on for that? We don't. We didn't. We didn't. Tommy Lee Jones running through sand dunes. Yeah, this is like, give her some money for this. It's Cutter, the sheriff, from the beginning.

He's chasing after her, that motherfucker. Long story short, after a dramatic car crash, the sheriff's car, she's on foot. They're in the Jeep. Through the sand dunes, they crash, they roll several times. She's been trained in six years for this. And then the police get out. They're totally fine. And they still catch her.

So she's gone. she's got she's in jail what the heck yep i know they catch her uh Tommy lee jones shows up to the jail he bails her out he uh is like thanks to the police officers

for catching catching my girl this one's mine puts her in the car gets her on the ferry to go home he's you know giving her a piece of his mind he's saying you were a lot closer to your son three days ago than you are today.

And she says, you have no idea what it's like to wait six years in jail. I didn't have a choice. Fuck your curfew. And he's not having it. He handcuffs her to the car. They're on the ferry. He gets up, leaves, goes to the top of the ferry. She's in the car alone, handcuffed daytime, morning time.

He leaves the keys in the car. Like, what is he thinking? Well, first of all, he goes up to put more scotch into his coffee. So he's like an alcoholic. That's part of the problem. He's troubled. She sees the keys. She's immediately wheels spinning.

She turns the car on. A lot of wheels need to spin for that. There are going to be some wheels that are spinning. She turns the car on. Car wheels spinning. Backs up into a pipe and like hits. But she's on a ferry, right? She's on the ferry.

The ferry's like. in the middle of the water. Yeah. Yeah. And there are a lot of people on the ferry. There are cars parked all around her other car. So what's the plan? So this is the plan.

The plan is she's backing up the car to break the handcuff. She slams into the car behind her. She's like, oh, fuck, fuck, fuck. Then she like goes forward to try to slam the handcuff. It's like kind of working. She's like getting it a little bit, but she hits the car in front of her. The car in front of her goes off the ferry. Just flies right off the fucking ferry.

No one notices. Sure. Not a person notices. Sure. So she keeps going. She's doing it. Just keeps going. And then...

I'll notice when they get off that ferry, though. Where's my car? At one point, Tommy Lee Jones looks out into the distance, sees like the top of a car kind of sink into the waves. And he's like, huh, that's not normal. So then he looks down. He sees all her shenanigans that she's up to. he's like shouts, screams, runs down. She realizes that he's coming for her.

So she just like guns it, goes for it, gets like one last, like really good knock on her handcuff. But it doesn't fully come off. And he like gets in the car with her right as she like drives the car right off the ferry. Wow. It's a bold plan. This woman. I don't think I would have done it this way. This woman is just like balls to the walls.

like it's like she's on such a time crunch. It's like a woman has never been on more of a time crunch in her life. Sure. So, which to be fair, I mean, like, at this point, at this point, you are fucked. Like if you get back, they're going back to prison. Sure, but if you're handcuffed to a car, you probably don't want to drive that car then into the ocean. Into the water. I feel like, you know, you want to be free to swim out of the car.

Yeah. Ideally. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So Tommy Lee Jones, humanitarian at heart, freeze her under the water, gets the key to the handcuffs, freeze her. They both swim to the surface, beautiful what lies beneath like shot. Because probably then he would be arrested for murder.

Yeah, maybe. Right? Because it's like you left her handcuffed. It's her fault, but like you left her handcuffed when he could have unhandcuffed her and she died. so you manslaughtered her? Yeah, it's pretty tricky. But I don't know what the laws are in this movie.

I think they have a different sort of experience about murder. And also not wanting a person to just, like, die would probably be also a motivating factor. You probably, yeah, maybe just don't want to let her die. But she clocks him in the head. Oh, my gosh. Swins away. He's clocked in the head, like out of it. In the water.

In the water. So she's kind of another murder slash manslaughtering him. Kind of another murder slash manslaughter situation. Yes. Yeah, I guess that one's murder. But the fairy's fully on it now. The fairy life guards are throwing him a life preserver. Oh, sure.

He's got a life preserver. Clunk. He's been clonked, but he's got the life preserver. She's swimming to shore. So she just swims to shore. Wow. And it worked. It worked.

She escaped. She's got that well. That ass paper in her pants or they take that from her in prison? Yeah, no. She has that wet ass paper in her pants. And jail. Sorry, that time it was jail. Oh.

To take it from her in jail. I see. Then Ashley Judd hitchhikes to her parents' house. Really quick scene outside her parents' house in the middle of nowhere. Her mom is digging in her garden. Ashley Judd is saying, like, where's dad? And her mom's like, he's at the VFW. like drinking gin and Ashley Judd is like, okay, well, nothing much has changed.

And then her mom digs under a big bush, finds a rested old tin, takes it out, hands it to her. She opens it up. It has a big wad of cash inside of it. Ashley Judd's mom says, I always said there was good money in tomatoes. So now she's got money. I guess she uses that money to buy a truck, big old pickup truck. She drives this pickup truck to a BMW dealership. She's looking at the BMWs.

She's walking around. A salesman comes up and is like, you want to buy this one? And she's like, yeah, why don't you? Can you just see if I can finance it? The name is under Angela Green. And then I guess maybe she did lose the paper then. I guess she did lose the paper. I don't know.

Because this whole, like, ploy is to get this man to tell her Angela Green's address. And he does. He says, 20 Oriole Terrace Evergreen, Colorado, that you? And she's like, yep, that's me. And then she just walks out of the BMW dealership back into her truck and drives to Colorado through the Rocky Mountains. Wow. Really stunning shots of the mountains, I will say. Then she arrives in Colorado. This is so not Colorado. I thought it was Pasadena at first. It ends up, it's Vancouver. But, like, I was like, this is not Colorado. She gets to this address.

This is a woman on a mission, all right? She's not stopping for anyone. She's not stopping to eat. She's not stopping me to eat. She's not stopping me to do anything. She's just on a mission. She parks her big pickup truck in front of this big, fancy mansion. She grabs a gun.

Oh, she stole Tommy Lee Jones's gun, by the way. When they were in the water, she stole his gun. So she grabs her gun She walks up to the mansion Well, but wet guns don't work Do wet guns work? I'm just kidding I think

I mean I guess I have no idea But I think yes But I just know that in movies Sometimes no So pretty interesting to think about Weird how But presumably maybe it's dry now Unless it follows the same rules

As the blood from earlier Yes Was it in a plastic bag Well double jeopardy works in this movie So let's say a wet gun works as well Correct. Those are the rules. Okay. A boy opens the door.

Boy looks like he could be eight. She's a moment she's saying, Maddie. She's like, what is this? And then quickly another woman comes up behind him carrying a baby. And she's like, oh, hi, I'm just looking for my friend, Angela Green. And she goes, I'm sorry. I don't know her. Like we just moved in.

And she goes, but maybe the woman next door would know she's lived here forever. So she goes back outside. There's a woman in the garden. And she says, I'm looking for my friend, Angela Green. And the woman is like, Angela Ryder. I knew an Angela Ryder. And she goes, I'm so sorry to have to tell you that the accident happened like three or four years ago now. I'm so sorry to have to be the one to tell you.

The stove exploded, the gas stove exploded and Angela didn't make it. And Ashley Judd is like taking us all in. She goes, what about the boy? And the neighbor says, oh, he and Simon, they weren't here when it happened. Simon. And she says, oh, that poor man, that poor man. I've never seen anyone so grief-stricken. So we go back to the library.

We're looking through some micro-feesh. Ashley Judd finds a picture of Angela Ryder's obituary and she notices while reading it there is a picture of the Kandinsky print in the background and she has this sudden thought which is again like why I could never be a detective or would never succeed in any of these movies is she's like hmm hmm I know, I know. I'll go to a fine art salesman and ask him about the latest sales of the Kandinsky's in the area. That's what she does. She goes to a, like, gallery, says that she's interested in purchasing a Kandinsky print or Kandinsky original, I don't know, from this time period and has him go look at his, you know, records. The books, yeah. The books. Check the books.

Check the books to see if there have been any Kandinsky sales or purchases in the past few years. As reasonable question as there ever was. I would like to know, does anybody else want to buy this or sell it? Hasn't it? This doesn't occur to anybody else? Do I have some peers? Well, also just the idea that, like, he would have even bought or sold a Kandinsky print is such a wild, like, shot in the dark. Oh, well, he can't go.

Six years without buying or selling a Kandinsky print. I guess so. I guess she knows him too well because she's right. However, while this is happening, the tension in the movie is Tommy Lee Jones is hot on her tail. Yeah, yeah. Hot on her tail. He's following her. P-Oed, probably.

He's P-Oed. He's following her truck. He knows what her truck looks like. And he's found her in this town. He's parked his car right behind her truck. She's in with a gallery guy right when she gets, she, address pops up a Jonathan Devereaux in New Orleans. Ooh, Devereux. Ooh, Devereux.

Oh, Devereux. That's from Detroiters. I actually don't even remember which. Devereux. This is from Detroiters. Detroiters. They write a song for Devereux Wigs. Detroiters is so good.

It's so really good. It's really. It's so funny. I think about that song. Joel and I say that song a long. Can you sing it right now? We sing it a lot. Can you right now?

Ooh, Devereux. That's the whole song. It's so funny. God, I love them so much. Well, so they were inspired by this movie. They were inspired by this. Of course they were. So she.

darts out of there right in time. Tammy Lee Jones turns the corner to go in and she's not there anymore. Where is she? She's back in her truck. She's slamming into his car. She's like, I don't get a shit that you tried to block me in. She's kind of rude at this point. Yeah. She just slams right into it. Zumes off. I guess to slow him down. Or just to be just well she can't leave otherwise. He tried to block her in and so she like doesn't have a choice. Really. Okay. Well, she didn't have a choice. Nothing she's done here has been. Her fault. Truly no. The gallery guy just goes, she seemed so refined. He's shocked. Tommy Lee Jones rolling his eyes.

He's like, ugh, got me again, this woman. Then she's on an airplane. She's sleeping. Somehow keeps the gun with her, by the way. Pre-9-19. Yeah, but can you bring a gun on a plane pre-9-11? I doubt it. Especially not yours.

Probably not without like some questions. You could, I think, yeah, you think you could, honestly, with a license. They're like, this is licensed to a parole officer. She was like, yeah, that's me. I don't know, man. I don't know what they fucking did in 1990. Well, it doesn't matter. Because she has the gun and she's on an airplane and she's going to New Orleans.

Joel's dad once brought an iguana secretly on an airplane. They didn't fucking see you. Secretly. Yeah. Before x-rays and stuff. Before x-rays and stuff. Yeah. Pre-9-11.

Pre-9-11. That would have been big. In iguana for Christmas when they were visiting. Florida and they of course wanted to keep the iguana but they had to fly back to Iowa and his dad put the iguana on his shoulder and just put his sport coat over the iguana and flew from Florida to Iowa with an iguana under his jacket that's so funny so if you can do that with an iguana I'm sure you can do with a gun what's the temperament of an iguana is iguana really friendly but somehow I think it was probably absolutely fucking shell shot he was probably just I think he was just like

frozen in panic fuck is happening to me But also it's probably toasting and warm in there, which, you know, is a cold-blooded creature. Probably just snoozed. So. You probably just snooze. So Ashley Judd, she follows the address that she found from the gallery men. Leads her to a fancy boutique hotel. This is where Jonathan Devereaux, nay, Simon Ryder, nay, Nick Parsons, lives.

This is a whole lot of work he's gone through. I know. She sees a sign that night. There's going to be an annual bachelor's auction. She's the gears are turning. She's thinking, hmm, okay, that would be a dramatic way to confront my husband. Perfect. It's not quite time square, but it'll do.

She kind of sidles up to the front desk. She overhears a woman talking to one of the. hotel workers. She's saying, my name's Jane Critch, room 1420, please send Jerome up to my room as soon as he's available. I need a massage, ASAP. Ashley Judd hears all of this. And she goes into the fancy boutique at the hotel and she has a pretty woman moment where, you know, the saleswoman is eyeing her suspiciously, which again, you wouldn't, because it's Ashley Jed, the most gorgeous woman you've ever seen in your entire life. She's just wearing neutrals. That's it. that's her big crime. But the saleswoman says to her, are you lost? Bitch? Such a bitch.

But Ashley Judge is so smooth. She goes, oh, no, I'm found. I just had an hour with Jerome. And the saleswoman is sold. She's suddenly like, oh, I hear Jerome. I hear he's fantastic. And, you know, Ashley Judd is looking through all the fancy dresses. And she goes, I'm thinking the Armani, charge it to my room, critch, 1420, Bada Bing, Bada Boom, works like a charm. Nice. Tommy Lee Jones, he's now in New Orleans too. He's followed the sent to New Orleans. He's in one of the police stations there. What about all his other people? I guess they're on their own. He has, this is the White Whale. He's on a mission as well. Yeah. He introduces himself to the

police chief, he says he's looking for this woman. Please, can you help me? The police chief at first is dismissing him. Like, we've got enough crime in New Orleans. Like, I'm not going to help you. And he goes, okay, that's fine. And this is when Tommy Lee Jones starts, like, putting it on the charm. You see a little bit more of, like, this side of him. He's like, oh, okay. Extra nine million on top of Yeah, this is where the $9 million comes up. He said, I just came down here as a professional courtesy, considering she came here to kill one of your most prominent citizens. The guy's like, okay, how she's going to do that? And he says, well, she'll probably use the 38 special she stole from me.

And the police chief is like, okay, all right, that's enough. We'll help you. He assents. That's enough. Just a few quick one-liners from Tommy Lee Jones. We'll do the trick anytime. Next, we got to Ashley Judd. Her, she's all that moment.

She's looking stunning. She's wearing a floor length, body hugging, black, diamond-encrusted gown. Her hair is up. Her makeup is perfectly done. She's walking into this black tie, fancy gala in this fancy boutique hotel that her supposedly dead husband now owns. There's big party, live music, chandeliers everywhere. fountains in the middle of the party. There's ice sculptures.

Remember when there are ice sculptures? Yeah. Yeah, we all remember. We all remember. Immediately, the emcee is getting everyone's attention. He tells a joke about the War of Northern Aggression, which is like, yuck. I don't want to hear about that. Then he introduces our host, owner of the hotel, Jonathan Devereaux.

Snick walks on stage. He's in a white tux And Billowing It's billowing Billowing And this is a bachelor's auction Which is so funny

Is this Do people really do this I feel like there's a thing in movies too Like It's the thing in I've seen it in a TV show Was it in the OC Or

Oh like you get to bid on this This young gentleman This handsome gentleman Yes Yes Yes Yeah that was in the OC And they probably

were like because Ryan was the handsome gentleman and was I believe a high schooler so so that's inappropriate yeah so maybe let's I'll have to I'll have to rewatch to make sure everything's go pathetic yeah I got to make sure that's all above four we're gonna have to do some research I'll be doing some research on that um so guess who's the first bachelor up it's Jonathan Devereaux. Right with himself, huh? I'm really going to call him Nick for the rest of this, though. Women are bidding back and forth, bidding more.

Then we hear Libby's voice in the distance. $5,000. He pauses. What was the bid at before? I think like $3,000 or something. I don't know. He was $5,000. He stops, stunned.

He recognizes the voice, but he can't see her, can't locate her in the crowd. She gets into a bidding war with another woman who was like dead set on winning Jonathan Devereaux. But it's over. She calls out $10,000. It's too much. And what is Jonathan Devereaux expected to do? Oh, I don't know. Like when he is won and purchased and paid for. That's my main question with this is it's like, are you supposed to do, are you supposed to have like one on one time? Is it implied there will be sexual acts that will happen, will be romantic? Yeah, very... That's prostitution and that's illegal.

Right. But not in this movie. Or the OZ. Right. Not when it's wealthy people. Not when it's men. Not when it's men and not when it's wealthy men. And then the woman who's bidding was like, you can have him, honey, believe me, he's not worth that much.

I know from personal experience. She's like Ashley Jett. She moves through the crowd to live. Well, voila, there she is. They lock eyes. She goes up on the stage and she says, well, aren't you going to give me a kiss? I think I've earned it. He goes in a kiss around the cheek.

She moves away. The whole crowd sees it. They're like, oh, humiliating. Wow. They walk off the stage. She immediately gets to it. She's like, listen, I'm going to make this really easy for you, Nick. I'll make you an offer you can't refuse.

You used to love a good deal. He's like, can we go somewhere private? Let's go somewhere private. And she goes, I don't think so. No, I don't think so. No. If I were him, I'd want to stay as public as possible. Well, she says...

Yeah, both of them, I think. Yeah. She says, I'm not going anywhere private with you. I remember what happened last time we were alone. And she says, you know, how long were you and Angie fucking before you decided to get rid of me? And she says, where is he? Where's Maddie? You destroyed my life.

I will destroy yours unless you give me Maddie. She says some of this in front of like the other. women. And so, like, it's implied, like, she's perfectly happy to, like, blow up his entire life. He immediately starts explaining. He's like, listen, let me explain it. Let me explain to you. You have to understand. We were going to lose everything. I didn't have, I didn't have a choice. I didn't have a choice. I got the life insurance to protect you. I never thought that they would convict you of this. I never thought they would convict you of my murder. She's like, they did Nick, they did.

And he's like, and the thing with Angie, that happened later. That happened later. It was a nightmare. She goes, is that why you killed her? He goes, that was an accident. She's obviously not buying any of it, but she's just here for a reason. It's clear in this moment she's not planning on killing him. She doesn't want to kill him.

She just wants Maddie. That's all she wants. That's all she care about. She's like, give me my child. And he says, I can't. His school is too far away. And in that moment... There's another daytime party.

And in that moment, Ashley Judd sees in the crowd, Tommy Lee Jones, kind of sneaking his way towards her. So she says, I'll call you tomorrow, Nick. And she slips away. Nick is like, okay, that's weird. Where'd she go? Tommy Lee Jones approaches him. Show us him a picture of Ashley Judd is like, this woman thinks that you're her husband, who she was conviction of killing.

Nick is like, oh, that's crazy. What? This is huge news to me. That's insane. Tom Lee Jones is like, why would she think that you are her dead husband? He's like, I don't know. I have no idea. And he's like, okay, well, this woman has a gun and she is looking for you.

So just be aware. Tommy Lee Jones is at this point, I think, is like, I think he's starting. to believe Ashley Judd a little bit, but not fully. Like he's like still confused. I think Timelaide Joe is still confused. Next, we get a chase scene through very crowded, rainy New Orleans. Ashley Judd is eating dinner. We see her eat finally.

Thank God. She hasn't eaten since that tapioca pudding six years ago or however long it's been. She's eating. A bartender takes pity on her, shows her a picture that he's like, The police have been passing this around everywhere. They're looking for you. And like the police are coming into this very crowded bar in this moment. And he's like, he can't throw an umbrella.

And he's like, you better get out of here now. So she takes the umbrella, goes out into very crowded. Nola streets. It's packed. It's jam-packed. I've never seen so many people in one place in my life. Pouring down rain, so many umbrellas. Chase scene ensues.

Tommy Lee Jones. chasing after her red umbrella, neutrals, full body and neutral clothing, finds her, loses her again, loses her again, finds her after her, gets right up behind her, grabs her shoulder, turns her around. It's not her. It's another woman.

She goes, hey. She goes, hey. She goes, hey. You jerk. He's apologizing. We see in this. that moment, Libby's in a store. She's like peering out, watching it happening, hiding. So she's safe for now. The next morning, Tommy Lee Jones, he goes to visit Nick.

Nick is in his suit. Everyone's wearing all the matter wearing suits all the time. But he's in a big fancy suit in his big fancy office in the hotel. He's smoking a cigar, first thing in the morning. And Tommy Lee Jones hasn't been able to like glance at a photo of Nick. So this is, that's eventually, this is we're finally getting to that point. It does take a really, longer than you would think. He's been all caught up trying to find her. It's 1990. Yeah.

It took a really long time for photos to load. Yeah. It's been loading this whole time. He's been waiting for it. He says, like, you know, welcomes him in. He says, as you can see, I'm alive and kicking. Tommy Lee laughs. He's starting to be like, this guy seems kind of like a douchebag.

He's like, listen, I just wanted to let you know that we spotted the Carson's woman in the quarter last night. I just wanted to come by to see if you'd heard from her. He's like, not a peep. Having heard a thing? He's like, any idea why she would have fixed her lunacy on you? And he's smoking a cigar going, well, the world's full of crazy people, right? Tommy Lee Jones laughs. And there's a way that Tommy Lee Jones laughs where you're just like, Tommy Jones fucking hates you, you know? Like he hates you right now. If I know Tommy Lee Jones, I think I recognize that laugh. I recognize it. And it's bad for you.

And he points to the wall where there's some Kandinsky prints. And he goes, hey, those are nice prints. Do you your kids make them? What is that, Picasso? What is it, Picasso? You're a fucking idiot. And he goes, no, they're by a great artist named Kandinsky. And then he stopped.

The only artist. He's not the only artist I know, I mean. I could name other artists easily, but he's just my favorite. It's, yeah, it's funny because Silas learned about Kandinsky last year and his three's program. So I'm kind of like, yeah. Yeah. Oh, you've heard, you've had enough. I've had enough of this. And then he pauses and he looks at him.

He goes, but I kind of think you already knew that. So, like, he's kind of picking up, like, maybe Tommy Lee Jones is, like, onto him a little bit. Investigating. Investigating a little bit. And then his phone rings. He picks it up. He goes, oh, this is a business call. Like, I got to take this.

Tommy Lee Jones, like, okay, all right, I'll get out of your hair. Sounds important. And then Nick says, oh, take the back entrance down to the. kitchen. So like also a douchebag move. Tomlin Jones is like, all right, I'll see you later. And then guess who's on the other end of the phone call? It is Ashley Judd, the actress. Thank you. Thank you. She said she was going to call. And she did. She's a woman of her word. She says, I want you to bring Maddie to Lafayette Cemetery number three. It's a big tourist place, lots of people around. And he goes, okay, I'll have him there by four. Cut two.

band playing St. James Infirmary, that song, you've all heard it. The, I can't sing it. It's, you recognize it. It's like a funeral dirge, classic southern funeral dirge as there's funeral possession walking into the cemetery. On one side is Ashley Judd. On the other side is Nick. They spot each other. She yells, where's Maddie? And he goes, relax. He was nervous. I told him he could play inside the cemetery. She goes inside the cemetery. She sees a kid in the distance. She starts chasing after him.

He runs away. Immediately you're like, this is not fucking Maddie. She doesn't know that. She thinks it is. Starts following him, follows him deeper into the cemetery where there are not so many people. The kid is sitting in front of a specific mausoleum.

And she approaches him. He gets up, runs away. Nick approaches, slams Ashley Judd's head into the side of the mausoleum. This guy's bad. He is bad news bears, pulls her inside. Then we're back at the police station. Tommy Lee Jones is looking up the name of Jonathan Devereaux. He's saying to the police, the Nola Sheriff, he's going,

did you ever arrest anyone you thought was innocent? The sheriff is going, no. It never happens. No, that's never happened to me. That's never happened. It never will. And it's loading, it's loading. And he's going, there's no information.

There's been no information on Jonathan Devereaux before three years ago. And the sheriff is like, that doesn't make someone guilty. Like, people change their names all the time. It doesn't mean that you're guilty if you change your name. Which I'm kind of like, I don't know about that. I mean, do people change their names all the time every three years? Like, I don't think people do that. Certainly not to, like, not hide something.

Right. It's worth taking a closer look at. Tommy Lee then calls someone in Washington State. I don't know who it is. They're pissed at him for leaving his station. They're like, you're going to have your job. Like your job, we're going to fire you. Like, what the fuck are you doing?

And Tommy Lee is like, I think this Parsons lady is telling the truth. I need you guys to send me a DMV photo license of Nick Parsons. Immediately, like, I'm asking you politely. You give me that goddamn picture. The whole police station gets quiet. Tommy Lee Jones means business now. They fax over a picture. We don't see what it looks like yet.

Then we're back at the cemetery. We see Nikki. We know. We know. We pay. We see Niki pays the kid. The kid walks out of the cemetery. Cut to black.

We just hear the flick, flick, flick, flick, flick, flick. Of a lighter. Flick, flick, flick, flick. The flicks on. You're breathing. Ashley Judd, she's in a coffin. Yikes. He put her in a fucking coffin, that piece of shit.

She's trying not to panic. There's a dead body next to her, a mummified body next to her, which is like, oh, really sick. That's where those go. Yeah. She gets her gun. There's like a tense scene. She's getting her gun. She slides it out of her pants.

She finds the hinges in the coffin. She lines up the gun. Bam. opens one hinge, bam, opens the other hinge. Is there like dirt and stuff coming in? Yeah, there's dirt.

There's shit everywhere. Like, she's trying not to light herself on fire. She's relaxed to a dead body. Like, it's like, things are not good for her. Right, right, right. Desperate times and all that. She pushes open the coffin. She's so strong.

Gets out. Oh, all that working out. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It wasn't for nothing. We're back at the police station. The picture's faxed over, but it's not him. It's not. Nick Parsons.

He's good. Good. He's covering his tracks somehow. The New Orleans Police Chief. Surely the police aren't corrupt. The New Orleans Police Chief is, like, the thing is every now and again, we all want to believe in something, but we keep forgetting that 99.9% of the time life just doesn't work out. And Tommy Lee Jones goes, I hadn't thought of that, mangled, thanks. I feel a lot better now. It's so funny, it's like, were these lines written for Tommy Lee Jones? Because the only person who can pull them off is him, like anyone else saying them wouldn't work. He has just constant sarcastic one-liners that are written simply for him.

We're back on Ashley Judd. She's broken out of the mausoleum. She is a mess. Her hair is askew. She's covered in cemetery schmutz. She's going through Norlands, look at a mess. Tommy Lee spots her. He runs after her.

He grabs her. He says, it's over Libby. It's over. And she breaks down crying, sobbing hysterically. Later, Nick is back in his hotel. Tommy Lee knocks on his office door. He says, I've got good news. I've got good news for you.

Mr. Devereaux. And they'll go into his office. He goes, turns out, I owe you an apology. After that last conversation, I started thinking maybe that Parsons lady was telling the truth. So I asked the Washington State DMV to send me a driver's license photograph. And this is what came up. He brings out the wrong photo. make laugh, see, lights another cigar. He goes, oh, well, we all make mistakes sometimes. And then

Tommy Lee Jones goes, yeah, but then I thought about it some more and realized that there are a lot of Nick Parsons, probably in Washington State. It's a pretty common name. So it ends up there six altogether. So I had them all sent over, and this one's photo number three. And it's a photo of him. And Nick is like, all right. He's like, okay. Darn it. Darn it, darn it. Dang. Got me. Got me.

He goes, all right, well, clearly you came to make a deal. Otherwise, you go straight to the police. So what do you want? What's your price? And Emily Jones says, one million dollars. Nice round number, right? And he goes, oh, one million dollars, I don't have that much money on me. You're going to have to give me a couple days.

He goes, nope, right now. Otherwise, and he takes out his cell phone, starts opening it up. He goes, okay, I've got $100,000 in the safe. you can have the rest tomorrow. And he's like, okay, sounds good. And he goes, but we have another problem, Mr. Parsons. What about Libby? What are we going to do about her?

And he goes, oh, that won't be an issue. It goes, oh, that won't be an issue. Let's just say that problem has been buried. And he goes, ha, ha, ha. Oh, really? Buried. And just then the door opens. Who walks in?

Ashley Judthi Act. Ashwitzy Libby. Ashley Judth. She's wiped the schmutz off her face, the cemetery schmutz. Her triumphant moment. She walks in, she's got the gun cocked and loaded, pointed straight at him. She goes, you're not very good at keeping promises, Nick. And Nick looks at Tommy Lee Jones.

He says, are you going to do something? And he's like, what are you talking to me for? She's the one with a gun. So she rocks right up to him. And that's my gun, so I don't have one. Exactly. Right. And Nick is going, they're tough in Louisiana.

be they're going to give you the gas chamber if you do this. Jesus. And she goes, no, they won't. It's called double jeopardy. Yeah. And I'm absolutely using it correctly. And I know that this is for real. She goes, I learned a few things in prison, Nick.

I can shoot you in the middle of Marty Gras and they can't touch me. She goes, where's my son? And he says, St. Albans School in Georgia. Then she shoots, it hits the Kandinsky print behind him. Nice. She smiles. laughs. She says, I haven't felt that good in six years. She goes, I don't want you to die, Nick. I just want you to suffer like I did. You're going to go to prison for murder, Nick. And he's like, what? Who did I kill?

She goes, me. You killed me. He goes, what evidence do you have? All you've got is this old photo, this old license photo. And she goes, that supplies the motive. Your wife, whom you'd framed, tracks you down and to keep her from exposing you, you kill her. He goes, you won't get away with it. And then Tommy Lee takes out a tape recorder from his jacket pocket, rewinds it, plays it. Nick saying, the problem has been buried. Then he stops it. And he goes, tape confession plays pretty well in a trial.

Also, all the physical evidence in your car, you know, of the whatever, all the physical evidence in your car. Shuffles and stuff. Sure. Yeah. And she, like, they've got him, right? then they have this moment where she's This is going to start all over again

He's going to go to prison He's going to make some friends Margaret and Evelyn They're going to tell him That now he can come out He can get her again If he tries to kill me Every six years We're going to have to do another big road trip

I mean when does the cycle stop It's a cycle of violence So Basically She starts to walk away He has a gun Nick has a gun under his desk, of course.

Sure. He shoots Tommy Lee Jones in the shoulder, starts trying to shoot at Libby. She dies behind a couch. He's trying to shoot at her. He's about to do the final kill shot. Tommy Lee jumps up, pushes him to the ground. They struggle with the gun. Nick is about to shoot Tommy Lee when Ashley Judd, bam, kills him, shoots him right in the head or right in the back.

I don't remember. Fully legally. Yeah, there's nothing anybody. can do. That's the end. Cut to Tommy Lee being wheeled out of the hotel on a stretcher. Police sirens everywhere. The police chief says to her, he's like, you're technically still his wife, so you just inherited a really nice hotel here.

It's crazy. Not only can we not arrest you, you just want a hotel. Those are crazy for him to be like, I know what the will says and I know all these details. She rolls her eyes. She says, not interested. And she says to Tommy Lee, she goes, well, I guess I'm going to take off now. And he goes, no, you're coming back with me back to Seattle. And at first friends now. And at first she's like, what are you saying? And then he goes, back to Seattle where I will demand a full pardon and a parade for you. And then he says, and a little pink poodle on a key chain like this. And he's like holding up this. I don't. know if this is a reference from something in the movie that got cut. I don't know what,

or if this is just like Tommy Lee Jones, like being like, like, like, like for this next take, can I just kind of do a thing? I just kind of be a little silly. I kind of brought something today that I think they'd be fun. Hopefully we could just kind of like. You paid me a lot. So I think you're going to let me do my thing. They start giggling. They're giggling together. They love each other now. They're best friends. And the next thing, you know, they're in the car. They're driving up. But the two of them, he's got his arm and a sling. She's driving. Driving up to St. Albans' school.

In this version of reality, everyone's like, well, now she killed her husband for real. And she was right all along and we feel good about it. Like, no. Like, I kind of thought maybe the deal was going to be that it's like she kills him in secret. And it's like it doesn't matter because we all thought he was dead already. So it's like, no, but they're just like, wow, congrats. You fucking did it. Yeah.

You fucking did it, girl. Yeah. To be fair, she didn't want to kill him. Like the plan was never for her to kill him. Yeah, no, she did nothing. That was, it ended up being self-defense in the end. Yes. And we find out that they're driving up to St. Alban's school.

This is where Maddie is. They stop. There are a bunch of kids playing soccer outside. She turns to her best friend, Tommy Lee. She says, I've never been so scared in my life. What if he doesn't recognize me? He's not taking that. He says, woman, because of you.

I've lost a perfectly good car and a not so good job. So he got fired from his job. Fair. And he goes, if you don't go get this kid right now, I'm going to have you arrested for stupidity. What authority. And they're laughing again. They have so many inside jokes. She says, thanks, you saved my life.

She gets out of the car. He says, you saved mine too. Oh, wow. She walks up to the soccer field. She spots a little boy playing. there's some very heartwarming, tinkly piano music. She's like, Maddie, he turns around, he looks shocked, he runs up to her, very cute little boy, not the same actor.

I was going to say, does he look five or eight? Different actor, same bull cut. Oh, for six years he's had that. Different actor. That's how you know it's him, though. Right, of course. He runs up to her, this poor little boy, she says, do you know who I am? He nods, he's shocked, stunned.

And he says, they told me you were dead. I thought you were dead. And she said, no sweetheart. And she smiles. She starts crying. Tommy Lee is in the car. He's looking on. He's crying.

She like reaches out to hug him tentatively. And then he like leaps into our arms and starts crying. They're all crying. Everyone's smiling. Everyone's crying. Wow. And I'm crying. I'm crying.

Yeah, yeah. Of course. And then freeze frame on Ashley Judd crying. Nice. Smiling tears. Roll credits. Incredible. Incredible ending on a freeze frame.

I love a freeze frame ending. What do you think, when do you think was the most recent end on a freeze frame? Like how many years has it been since a movie in full earnestness? Not as a joke. Yeah, that's the difference. Was like ending on a freeze frame. I kind of think the brutalist did it, but I don't know. Whoa.

I don't, I can't say for sure. But let me know in the comments if I'm right. Yeah, let us know. I haven't seen. any movies in so long. I don't watch any, like, recent movies, so I don't know. Oh, no other choice did it this year as well. I feel like it's more common in foreign films. What did they freeze frame on exactly? Just anything. Anything. Oh, anything. Whatever's happening in that final scene. Like, is it a, like, it's a facial expression? Do you know what I mean? Because in this, it's, like,

I can't remember what it was, but I'm pretty sure it happened. Okay. Okay. Okay. I believe you. I believe Yeah, so. Wow, Hen. Em, what'd you think? I loved it. But I loved it mostly because you told it to me. You would love it just for Ashley Judd. Ashley Judd.

I'm sure I would. She makes the movie worth watching, I'd say. She does such a good job. Which is why she deserves one-tenth of the... I know. Of the salary. It's pretty nice. A totally ludicrous movie.

Loved every second of it. Absolutely perfect. Probably the reason I wanted to be a lawyer my whole life. But they asked me. So that you could understand the concept of double jeopardy? Yeah, and realize it's all wrong. They asked me in my law school interview. They say, why do you want to do this?

I say, you've ever seen the movie, Double Jeopardy? Changed my life. Double jeopardy? Fifth Amendment to the Constitution. The fifth amendment to the Constitution. Listen up. Yeah, it's a good one. What a thrill.

Thank you so much for giving me the opportunity to really like dig into it you know no thank you henley thank you for retelling it perfectly it's just as good as i remember yeah sammy is it i'm gonna go right in my diary update heard about it 2026 heard about it is it just like you remembered is there anything different about it um i don't feel like i remembered really any of the details other than her like getting revenge and being like I get to kill him now. I felt the same way. When I rewatched, I'd completely forgotten the whole part and when she goes back to Woodby Island and has like the crazy sand dune chase and the fairy stuff. That was totally gone from my memory. Yeah, I don't remember any of that. But yeah, it's a fun one. Wow. Wow. I love you guys. What a treat.

I love you. Love you. What a perfect. Love you all. Love you listeners. Everything's only good. Everything's only good as far as I'm concerned. Nothing bad. I can someone do a Norlands accent? Norlands. Nallands. From all of us here.

Too scary. Too scary. Just as some somewhere in that region. Were they in Norlands? Norlands. Now Orleans. No Orleans. From all of us here. Why do we all go so deep from all of us?

From all of us here. From all of us. We're not. Didn't watch. Didn't watch. Goodbye. Goodbye. Goodbye.

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