Too Scary; Didn't Watch - NOSFERATU

Episode Date: January 8, 2025

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This is a HeadGum Podcast. This is Emily, Henley, and Sammy, and you're listening to Too Scary, Didn't Watch. Hi everyone, welcome to Too Scary, Didn't Watch, the horror movie recap podcast for those too scared to watch for themselves. I'm Emily and I'm too scared to watch scary movies. I'm Henley and I'm also too scared to watch scary movies. I'm Sammie and I love watching scary movies and so I watch them so that you don't have to and Emily was lying earlier.

I lied. She watched this scary movie with me. I did. This week's movie. Emily was lying earlier. She watched this scary movie with me. This week's movie and a much anticipated movie. And I can't wait to talk about it. What movie is it? Guys, I don't even know. She doesn't even know and I'm not even gonna tell her.

Oh my God, it's a surprise. I'm never gonna tell her. She's never gonna know. You're gonna send the whole time guessing. I'm gonna guess the whole time. I like your background. Your background looks very vampire-esque. Ooh, is it?

Does it? Maybe you might be onto something. Is it Nostra Aetna? I won't say. I simply can't say right now. But if you're on the fricking edge of your seat dying with anticipation and you wanna jump straight to that recap,

there are timestamps in the show notes. But first, I gotta ask my two best friends, did anything scary happen to you this week, this year? Oh my gosh, here we go. Emily, you have to go first. Okay, well, mine's not scary. Ooh, okay, I like that. I'm lying again. I guess not lying, okay, I like that. I'm lying again.

I guess not lying, I told you the truth. I'm just gonna give, I finally feel, I'm even a little bit, I guess the scary thing is even a little bit nervous to reveal this, but I'm going to. I finally feel ready to provide a happy update to everybody here, which is that a miracle has occurred

and our wedding film was found. Woo! Woo, baby! Oh boy, oh boy. Think the stars. Crazy. Really, really wild stuff, everyone. And they just showed up, right?

It just like, they just showed right up. And they just showed up, right? It just like- It just showed right up. It just showed right up after two months of not existing and nobody having any idea what happened to it. It just arrived at the film. It arrived at the lab. It arrived at the lab on the very day that Henley, you had advised me via suggestion of somebody,

maybe, maybe one of you listeners to email the CEO of UPS. Yes. I think someone commented that like that worked one time. I think that was on like a Reddit sub Reddit about like how to get lost mail back. I'm telling you that's not what got it back, but I am going to props to the executive suite of UPS. I emailed all of them.

You can Google people's corporate email addresses. I could go the entire executive suite. Joel sent them an email within 45 minutes. They had someone call us back. It was so fast. He explained to them what had happened. This woman got the tracking number. And as Joel was on the phone with this woman, same day we had emailed, we had been like,

let's just email them, let's just see what happens. She goes, oh, it was just delivered. It had literally been delivered that same morning. Like it was already at the lab. So it wasn't the executive suite, like flying in to the lab. Get it there, get it there, get it there. No, but I feel like I told Joel, I was like, I think we should have dangers, So it wasn't the executive suite like flying in to the lab. Get it there, get it there.

No, but I feel like I told you, I was like, I think we Schrodinger's cat-ted it. You know, I think we like made it exist again by doing that because we are very powerful beings. And yeah, they still don't know what happened, but they think it must have gotten their best guess is it got mixed up with some Amazon shipments from the UPS store.

And that's why it was never scanned in because it was not in the right place. And it took them two months, I guess, to sort through all the Amazon stuff at the Amazon warehouse and find it. Because on there and they were like, oh, it reappeared in Las Vegas, which is where there's a big like Amazon place warehouse.

And then it made its merry way, made it to the lab. Joel, that whole day, Joel and I just kept looking at each other being like, because we had so come to terms with it was gone. We were never gonna see it. But then I couldn't figure out how to, we were thrilled, but we were also just like, what? It was like someone coming back to life.

It was like someone returning from the dead. Yeah, it was so strange. And I didn't say anything for a while on the podcast or even tell my parents because I was like, I need to wait until I've got like, because then the film still had to be scanned and processed and all those things that like, we still didn't have it, we still didn't have it.

And I was like, you know, maybe, maybe this is like cursed film and it's something is gonna continue to be wrong. We still have not seen the images, but our photographer has. I just talked to her, she's like, you can exhale. Like it's good. Like we've got it. Everything's there.

It all is working out. So we should see our fucking wedding photos soon. And I can't believe it. It's a Christmas soon and I can't believe it. It's a Christmas miracle. I can't believe it. It's really wild. It's something straight out of Hot Frosty. Something straight out of Hot Frosty.

And I did see him at the grocery store the other day. Oh yes. Oh yeah, Hot Frosty at the grocery store. He hangs out there a lot cause it's nice and chilly. Yeah, he was in the freezer section. I'm really glad that I can go back to loving UPS cause I really- They did great because I really love UPS. Amazing customer service.

They're the best. All the UPS stores I go to, everyone's always so nice. And their CEO is a woman. I know that now. Yeah. Most of the rest of the executive suite is men, if not all, but that's okay. And they were great. they were fucking great.

I like got a really, yeah, let's love UPS. Let's love them. Let's love them. Okay, I will. Oh my gosh. Okay, that's great. Wild stuff, you guys. A real roller coaster.

I'm so happy. What if all the pictures absolutely suck? They're gonna be great. They're definitely not gonna suck. They're definitely not going to suck. I'm so excited to see them. All of our eyes are closed in all of them. Someone's sneezing in every single photo. Or like our eyes are just X'd out.

We're like, wait a minute. Yeah, it's like all of a sudden it's a demon wedding. We look at the pictures and we're like, wait, what the fuck? Ghosts of so many children floating in the background. Yeah, the most haunted wedding of all time. It was all captured on film. It's just like children drawing terrifying photos in the background. Yeah, the most haunted wedding of all time. It was all captured on film. It's just like children drawing terrifying photos in every single.

Yeah, because we were like in a room with the whole back wall was mirrors and like we're going to see some crazy shit reflected back in those mirrors, trap souls. But it would be cool either way. Yeah, you know, like we had not, I was like, I can't even let myself imagine what we're not getting. And now I'm like, oh my God, all I can think about

is all the things that are gonna be on that film. All the lost souls. Very excited. So not scary, sorry. What about you guys? I don't know. I don't have anything good for this, but I did just want, okay, well,

let's keep the good feelings rolling, which is that I just want to give everyone an update that Tim is growing his yearly mustache. It's looking great. You guys got to see it just now. Every January, a switch flips in Tim's mind and he says, I shall have a mustache now. And I always equivocate.

I'm always like, I don't know about that. Strong start to the year. I don't like, I don't know about that. Strong start to the year. I don't know, I don't know about that. But this year, I'm really liking it. I really like the mustache this year. And let's just all raise our hands in glory and happiness because I love them. Glory.

I love the mustache so far. It's been four days, so we'll see. And then- Pretty good mustache for four days in. I know, I think he looks great. He's looking really, he's looking so cute. I, Tim, I love you. And then the other thing, which is not so fun, but luckily nothing actually bad happened.

Yesterday, May and I were walking to the grocery store. It's a short walk away, but there's one kind of busy intersection that has crosswalks that you're supposed to be able to, you know, cars are supposed to stop for you, but it's very busy and cars are driving. People are driving like maniacs in this town. Everyone, I swear to God,

everyone is in their fucking like test, like cyber truck or their Porsche and they're driving 75 miles per hour. They're like coked out of their mind hedge fund managers and no one is looking where they're going and it stresses me out so much. So it's such a short walk to the grocery store, but every time I'm like, okay,

I feel like I'm gearing up for battle. And so this time there's like a big truck, it It's red light. There's a big fucking truck. There's glare, so I can't really tell if the guy sees me, but I'm like, stop. I'm like looking at the guy. I'm like, pretty sure he sees me. Looking at the guy, pretty sure he sees me. So I start going. And then, still red light, the guy just starts to go.

Like, starts to just drive right into me and May. So I like swerve into the busy road. May almost falls out of the stroller, like fully like I let stroller fully like tips over. And I like, it's like happened in slow motion and I was so calm in the moment. Like it almost felt like, it almost felt like of course this is happening.

Of course we'll be run over by a truck. Like it almost felt like, it almost felt like, of course this is happening. Of course we'll be run over by a truck. Like, of course. I think that's literally how my brain was acting in that moment. And then the guy rolls down his window, he stops, he slams on the brake, he stops. I write May, be like, keep going.

I turn around, I look at him. And he like leans out the window and he's this old man. He goes, didn't see you there. I was like. I was like. I was like, speechless. So that's not an apology. Didn't see you there. I'm speechless.

I just turned around. I keep walking. Didn't see me and my baby in the stroller. He was so casual. He was like, it was like so casual. Not a care in the world coming from this guy. Meanwhile, I turn around, I keep walking. I truly, I take like five steps, I burst into tears.

Like hysterical tears. Like just by myself now, like walking down the sidewalk with my baby, like just tears like streaming down my face because it was terrible. It was like even in the moment, I did not feel scared at all but like it was so scary. It was like even in the moment, I did not feel scared at all, but like it was so scary. It was actually so scary. And then I had to go into the grocery store,

like feeling like my heart was racing. I was like, tears were still coming out my eyes. And I was like, okay, what am I gonna do? What am I gonna do if I see someone I know? Cause like half the time I see someone I know. And I was like, how am I gonna play it? How am I gonna say, oh, I almost got over out there. Some guy didn't see me there. Out there. Big truck didn't see me, huh?

How are you doing today? Because also our neighbor, Suzy, in the same grocery store parking lot right around Christmas time, a car backed up right into her grocery cart and ran over her grocery cart. Like people are driving like maniacs out there and I don't feel safe. I don't even feel safe in the car anyway, but Tim has a mustache and so things are looking good. It's 2025.

Highs and lows, highs and lows. Highs and lows, highs and lows, highs and lows. Life is long. How are you guys doing? I won, that just reminded me of a time that I was at a four way stop sign and it was my turn to go and someone just completely ran the stop sign

that was about to like T-bone me in my side, just like coming at me full speed and then like slammed on their brakes and honked at me,, slammed on the horn also. And same thing in the moment, I just kind of looked and gave a little like, that was your fault look. And then kept driving and burst into tears

and I was on my way to a acupuncture appointment and I walked in and was just, I couldn't stop sobbing and I was like, I'm so sorry, I can't stop crying. That's what I felt too, like it was uncontrollable. Like I was like, I was like, that doesn't happen to me that often. I was like.

Probably like a come down from the adrenaline of that moment. It reminds me of, have you guys heard of, this is in, I think the body keeps the score. They talk about how bunnies after they're chased by a predator and they like make it to safety, they start convulsing or kind of seizing like their whole body shakes and it's a way to release all of the adrenaline. And so I think it probably is something to do with that, like your body just needs to get rid of.

I thought you were going gonna say the bunny cries. The bunny bursts into tears. The bunny has a little box of Kleenex in their home. Oh. Yeah, man, being a bunny, being chased by things that are trying to eat you like all the time. That sucks.

That's why they have so much sex probably. It's like a tension reliever. Just make it count while you can. probably. It's like a tension reliever. Just make it count while you can. But I have been having a scary thing happen to me all year long. It's been happening for almost a month now, which is that my neighbors always put up really elaborate Christmas decorations that I really appreciate. It's like, even though they're directly next to my apartment and it seems like daytime all night long because it's so bright, I still appreciate it because I think it's very fun. They seem to really enjoy putting it up.

It's a big family and it brings me a lot of joy, usually. But this year, they added in a singing minion decoration. No, oh no. That sings nonstop jingle bells in Minion speak. So it's just like, Minion speak, Minion speak. Sorry, I don't speak Minion. You don't speak Minion. But it's gibberish jingle bells all fucking day, every day.

Why would anyone want that? It's so crazy. And it's just, it's like, they must know it's annoying. And so it's turned down. It's not like blasting. It's just loud enough for me to feel like it's inside your own head. But why would it, why would they even want it to be plain?

Like all day. Don't you want to just turn that on every now and again? And the weird thing is they turn it off at night when the lights go on. So maybe they're like, we need to make up for daytime, the light we can't see. We need a daytime decoration. We can't see the lights.

So we need some sort of audible decoration. Wow, that would really piss me off, honestly. Like if that was, that would be really annoying. Yeah. It's gotta be close to the end, right? You would think this is January 5th at the time of this recording. It's still up, it's still happening today.

Oh no. That's too soon. So yeah, I don't know. That comes down on December 26th. That's okay. Pray for me. Yeah, we gotta take the minion down on December 26th. Leave the lights, Praise me. We gotta take the minion down on December 26th. Leave the lights, take the minion.

Yeah, I'm done with it. I'm really done with it. So we need to go cut some wires somewhere. Yeah. So this is an every repeat next year. But there's no cover of darkness with those lights. Oh, that's true. Always be seen.

Uh-oh. That is true. No good time to go in and sneak in and destroy that minion. Yeah. cover of darkness with those lights. Oh, that's true. Always be seen. Uh-oh. That is true. No good time to go in and sneak into the story that Minion. Yeah, yeah. So just really hoping that they take it down of their own accord soon. Yeah.

You could just write them a really funny note, like a kind note that's like, I love your decoration so much. So as of today, it's Monday, January 6th and the Minions still up. And I would just wondering when you're going to take it down. Or at least turn the sound off. Yeah. So to the maker of that particular Minions product, may you burn in hell for all eternity. That does remind me. A eternity. A fitting punishment. My mom this year, when we went to my parents' house after Christmas, and when we arrived, there was like a life-sized nutcracker on the stoop with lights.

Life-sized like the size of a human man? Yeah, like playing a drum. Whoa. And with lights flashing. Was man. Yeah, like playing a drum. Whoa. And with lights flashing. Was he hot? And like playing music. Did anyone try giving him a kiss or a scarf? And we were all like, what is this?

And my mom was like, it's so tacky, I know. It's so tacky, I know, but I just couldn't stop myself. I couldn't help myself. And I was like, I don't think it's tacky. I'm just surprised to see it here. Like, who's it for? She was like, it's fory, I'm just surprised to see it here. Like, who's it for? She was like, it's for you, isn't it fun? And it was fun, but it also broke

truly like 12 hours into them having it. Like they just turned it on and it broke a mere few hours later. So- Was it like wooden? No, it's like a big mechanical cracker. Like a huge- Mechanical?

I don't know what it's made out of, plastic and metal. Okay, wow, this is. It's a huge nutcracker with a drum and lights and it's playing the drum and it would sing little songs. Where do you throw away something like that when you're done with it? I mean, it broke of its own accord, I don't know. You smash it up with a hammer into smaller pieces.

Yeah, that feels like, that's how you're asking for that toy to come to life and fucking haunt you. Yeah. Oh boy. Well, let's do what we came here to do. Let's do it. And talk about this week's movie, which is Nosferatu.

I'm excited. Written and directed by Robert Eggers, writer-director of The Witch, The Lighthouse, The Northmen. It was inspired by the screenplay of the 1922 film, Nosferatu, written by Henriques Galline, inspired by Bram Stoker's Dracula, starring Lily Rose Depp, Nicholas Holt, Aaron Taylor Johnson, Emma Corrin, Willem Dafoe, and Bill Skarsgård.

It is in theaters now. And here we are. This was one of my most anticipated movies of the year. I'm so excited to hear about it. I was just looking at pictures of Lily Rose Depp's costumes and like all the design stuff that went into that. Costumes, fabulous, the cinematography, fabulous, gothic architecture, spooky.

Visually stunning. And Emily saw it with me. Emily was brave. Mm-hmm. How'd you do, Em? I did great. I did great. I did great. You did really, really well. I was very nervous about it,

but then it was fine. We'll get into it, but I actually don't think it's that scary. Yeah, I agree. Personally. I agree. It's like gross and gory, but less scary. Yeah.

Moody. And I have not, I meant to try to watch the 1922 Nosferatu before this. I didn't. Have you seen it? Have you never seen it? I've never seen it. I've seen a lot of clips of it because they, it's like in film school, there's a lot of cool stuff. Also, one of the trivia things was like,

just phrased it as 1922 being 102 years ago, which like, obviously I know math wise, but seeing it written, I was like, whoa, that's so crazy. Yeah, I know. Yeah, that is crazy. I have seen it, it's been a very long time, but I did watch it once. Yeah, and then there's also a 1979 remake

by Werner Herzog starring Isabella Gianni from Possession, which I also have not seen. Lily Rose Depp said that Possession was an inspiration to her performance. I feel like possession should be an inspiration for everybody's performance for everything. Could all stand to add a little Isabella Johnny in possession to your performance?

Why the hell not? Just sprinkle it in if you can. Henley, have you seen any, either of the original slash 70s version? No, she's shaking her head. I'm pretty sure I haven't. I feel like that's a movie that I would have like seen in college by accident. Do you know what I mean?

But have no memory of. So yeah, I didn't realize how much of the plot I remembered until watching this, because it's a silent film and it's... I have read Dracula. It looks like a movie from 1922. So I remember at the time being like, oh, it's cool. But, you know, not like, God, I have to watch and rewatch it. But, you know, it's like visually very stunning

and they pulled a lot of cool visuals, I felt like, for this. It would be interesting to watch all three right in a row. Yeah. Like 22, 79, and then this one. I get the 1922 Nosferatu mixed up with The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari. I think they're both German films from about that time. And I think both just like had a big impact on film in general.

But again, I didn't see them and I didn't really do a lot of research. So do your own research. Do your own research. Go to film school, you nerds. Go to film school if you want. You care this much. Go to film school. Go to film school, you nerds. Go to film school if you want. You care this much. Go to film school.

You want to fucking learn about nose for mouth. Go to film school, dorks. Go to fucking film school. Like me. And the original 1922 film, this I did look up, this is as much of a fact as IMDB can be a fact, that it was almost lost. Bram Stoker apparently, or his widow took legal action against F.W. Murnau, the director of the 1922 Nosferatu.

And due to the similarities of Dracula, because I guess it was like an unauthorized riff on Dracula. Oh. And the judge ordered all copies to be destroyed, but some of them survived and... Wow. Okay. Pretty crazy.

Goodness. Goodness, goodness gracious. Goodness gracious. Like back in the day when such a thing could happen, where you could like destroy a movie, it still didn't work. Still didn't work. Still didn't work. This isn't a silent movie, right?

Is it silent? Okay. No, but it is, there are black and white scenes in it. And every time there was a black and white scene, I would be like, has this whole movie been in black and white this whole time? Same, same.

I had so many moments of that. And then I'd be like, no, her dress was blue. Like that literally is what brought me back. I remembered one of her dresses that I liked and it was blue. I was like'd be like, no, her dress was blue. That literally is what brought me back. I remembered one of her dresses that I liked, and it was blue. I was like, the dress was blue, the dress was blue. Because it really did confuse me every time. Yes, so the film is so-

It happens subtly. You're like, wait, all of a sudden I'm in black and white? That's cool. But the color scenes are so desaturated, and there's a trivia about it. It says, to get the film's eerie hyper-moonlit look, the crew filmed the night scenes during daytime, and in post-production ran it through a computer

to remove the red and yellow color spectrum. So it feels like color is missing, but it's not black and white. Got it, okay. Cool. That's cool. Did you guys see the Northmen, by the way? Yes. Yeah, I didn't like it. Got it, okay. Cool. That's cool. Did you guys see The Northman, by the way? Yes. Yeah, I didn't like it. All right, yeah.

But I'm open to a re-watch. I'm open to a re-watch. I didn't hate it, but I didn't. It's kind of big and silly. It's got a lot of great actors in it. Right. Got a lot of great actors. I just remember reading about it and his attention to detail is just very extreme.

His attention to detail is very intense. You can really, I mean, yeah, especially like visually, everything is so gorgeous and like purposeful and the sets, the costume design, it's really like a real feast for the eyes and feels so, so, so, so, like meticulously put together. He's very good at that.

And I guess I forgot to say that Nosferatu, this Nosferatu has an 85% on Rotten Tomatoes, a 78% on Metacritic, a 7.7 on IMDB, really high for IMDB. Really high. The budget was around 50 million and so far it has made 72.4 million. And it's only been in theaters a couple of weeks. So yeah, that's pretty great. Came out Christmas Day.

It's a fun Christmas Day film. It is. There is like mention of Christmas in it. I think just once they like talk about how it's like the holidays. Like, oh yeah, there's a Christmas tree at one point. It's a Christmas movie then. Yeah. Baby Girl, which also came out on Christmas Day, is also a Christmas movie. It's also a Christmas movie.

Just add it to the growing canon of Christmas movies. Yep. Carry On, which came on Netflix, I think, around Christmas Day. Also a Christmas movie. And I was thrown by Baby Girl being kind of a Christmas movie. I was like not expecting that to be part of it. Yeah, it was fun. The castle scenes in this were filmed

in the Czech Republic in the same location that was used for Werner Herzog's Nosferatu. Oh, that's cool. Kind of fun. Hey, if it ain't broke, don't fix it, you know? Yeah, I heard they got a castle that works really well for this. Some casting what ifs that you may know

if you were following the widely talked about news about this movie. Anya Taylor-Joy was originally supposed to play the Lily Rose Depp part, but I guess the film got delayed a while and it conflicted with Furiosa, so she had to drop out. Harry Styles was supposed to play the Nicholas Holt part. Again, scheduling.

Scheduling past works. Yeah, that would have been. Yeah, what's going on with Harry Styles' acting career? He's really dropped out of the spotlight. He really had too much. I think he had a tough time. He had too much attention. Don't worry, darling, out of the spotlight. He really had too much attention. Don't worry darling, it was too much. It was all too much.

It was really a movie, man. It was too much for me, I can't imagine. He's done making movies. I'm honestly impressed that someone at his level of fame has managed to be like, I'm out for a bit. He just shaved his head and everyone was like, oh, we don't like him anymore. I don't wanna look at you, go away.

Oh no, I didn't know that's what happened. Him and Britney Spears. It's exactly. It turns out if you want people to stop paying attention to you, you just gotta shave your head. Not that anybody ever stopped paying attention to Britney Spears, but. I like a shaved head.

Me too. I like hair. Okay, well. We can't agree on everything. Bill Skarsgard set, Bill Skarsgard, I guess was also originally cast as the Nicholas Holt part. And then- That's fucking wild.

Is yeah, really crazy. The man is made to be a monster. He's made to be a vampire. And he said that his voice was the aspect that he worked hardest on. He worked with an opera singing coach to be able to lower his voice a full octave. It's very low.

Really low voice. Like, no, it's far out. It's almost as low as the guy who does the AMC thing. Picture a better world. His voice is so low. It's shocking. He said that he spent six weeks before shooting, not doing much else than just recording himself.

And on set, he would keep doing these exercises that were kind of like Mongolian throat singing. Whoa. It really paid off. He sounds great in it. Wonderful vocal performance. And I mean, regular performance too, but the voice really, you really notice the voice.

I want to take voice lessons. I want to learn how to speak better. I want accent lessons. I want an accent coach. That'd be cool. That would be fun. Who was dying for that? And Robert Eggers revealed that Lily Rose Depp

brought him to tears during her audition. He praised her, calling her audition insane and referring to her as a feral actor. Whoa, release the tapes. I wanna see that. You know what, sometimes they release that. She gets kind of feral at one point. She does get a little feral in it.

Look, we've talked about this before. One thing we all can agree on is that we love an Epo baby. And- We're proud of them. I'm happy that she's got the juice. I really am. What? Her and Bill? What?

Yeah, they got the juice and like, you know, Johnny is complicated, but it would be so wild to have him be your father for so many reasons. But I'm glad she inherited that juice man because she is so, you just wanna look at her, you just wanna watch her. Yeah, she's captivating.

We've also talked about that, that star power to me is just like, I just wanna look at you, do your thing. And she really has it. Remember when her and Timmy Chalamet were a thing? Oh my God, that's right when they were babies. Remember that? Yeah, and I always moved on to Kylie Jenner. That was the one where they kissed on the boat, right?

That photo of them like eating each other's faces. And he looks so funny in that. They're so little. They're both so little. Oh, little tadpoles. Oh, how they've grown. And now they're full grown. They're huge.

Large adults. Almost nutcracker sized. Made of metal and plastic. And now they're full grown, large adults. Almost nutcracker sized. Made of metal and plastic. Two absolutely huge giant individuals. And then last but certainly not least, Willem Dafoe does a scene in this movie

with 2,000 live rats. And we watched a little interview with him and he loved the rats. He's a friend of the rat. On him, on his body, on his person? Not on his body. They're not on his body. The rats are on some people's bodies.

Yes, there are some rats on some bodies, which were done practically. You could tell they're real rats. Those are real rats. And I like rats, but there is something about seeing so many rats that even I don't like. You guys, I don't know if I've ever told you this.

You know, and I don't know if I've spoken around on the pod, but listeners who don't know, I was in an Ozzy Osbourne music video when I was five years old. Oh yeah. Have you talked about this in the podcast? I don't know if you have. I don't think that I have. It Ozzy Osbourne music video when I was five years old. Oh yeah, have you talked about this in the podcast? I don't know if you have. I don't think that I have.

It's kind of like one of the craziest things about you that you almost never discuss. Well, I forget about it a lot, but. It's a hell of a good trivia. It would be kind of funny if you talked about it all the time though. That would be pretty annoying. I mentioned it every episode.

I don't know if I've actually ever mentioned it on the pod, but when I was... But it's, in the music video, there were originally going to be live rats running at my feet, and I was excited about it, because I like rats. My mom was very nervous about it. But the day of the shoot, the rats were acting up.

So they decided against it. Let's not put the rats on against it. But there was- Let's not put the rats on the child. But there was like a cage of rats ready to go that we ended up not using. She's so good at it, you guys. She's so cute. She's so freaking cute.

She's so cute. In a nasty nightgown of sorts. Yeah. Unbelievable star power. Yeah, unbelievable star power. My god. Sammy's smart. And I was not scared of the rats, but there was a scene where I had to flip a switch and

they said there was going to be sparks that would fly out and they were just like visual. They weren't hot or anything. They like physically couldn't harm me and I burst into tears. I was like, no, I'm not doing that. And so they had to add it in in post. I was a little div, scared of the sparks. Wow. So enough trivia about the movie and about me.

No, keep going, more trivia about you. Another day, another day, Henley. Another day. I'll think on it, think on it. But let's watch this trailer. Yeah, let's do it. Come to me. Come to me. Hey, Michael.

Come to me. Professor. My dreams are talking. I'm not going to let you go. I'm not going to let you go. I'm not going to let you go. I'm not going to let you go. I'm not going to let you go.

I'm not going to let you go. I'm not going to let you go. I'm not going to let you go. I'm not going to let you go. I'm not going to let you go. I'm not going to let you go. I'm not going to let you go. I'm not going to let you go.

I'm not going to let you go. I'm not going to let you go. I'm not going to let you go. I'm not going to let you go. I'm not going to let you go. Professor, my dreams grow darker. Does evil come from within us or from beyond? He is coming. He is coming. He is coming to us. He is coming. Who is coming to you, my child? We are here encountering the vampire. Nosferatu. Fuck yeah.

I love this. Great. I fucking love this, man. Really, really good trailer. Honestly, that trailer is scarier than the movie I thought. There are a good amount of jump scares in the movie, but they're the kind of jump scares that I like because there's not tons of buildup to them. So you're not like, oh my God, jump scares coming, jump scares coming. It just all of a sudden goes like, baa. They're just like very effectively like, because there's not tons of buildup to them. So you're not like, oh my God, jump scares coming,

jump scares coming. They're just like very effectively like, yeah. It's like editing, it's editing jump scares. Ooh baby. And also honestly, maybe I'm really brave. Maybe it is scary. It's probably both. I think you are really brave now, Emily.

It's also, yeah, it's not the kind of thing that makes, because it's not super tense. It's not the kind of thing that I get like very scared not super tense, it's not the kind of thing that I get very scared by. I really don't like the paranormal activity type. Where you're just like scanning. Yeah. Scanning. That I can't do.

Also, there's something about it being so stylized and thematic and such a period piece. And yeah, it kind of, it removes some of the emotion a little bit in like a good way for me. Yeah, I felt, I honestly felt very calm. I was also in those, you know, those AMC signature recliners.

I was sitting back. Ooh, I snuck in some In-N-Out. Oh, it's so good. What? Yeah, and Jenna had gotten popcorn and she put jalapenos on it, which I've never seen anybody do. She does do that and it's really good.

And it smelled so fucking good. Wait, like pickled jalapenos? Yes. What? Did she bring her own jar of pickled jalapenos? No, you can get them from AMC. Like for nachos. Oh, for nachos.

You just have to like ask for a side of jalapenos. That's literally blowing my mind. I would love that. It's really good. Yeah. Hot tip from Jenna. And it smelled so good the whole time. And Lily Rose Depp.

My God, can't take my eyes away. Truly. She looks amazing. Did either of you watch the idol? No. Because it's a terrible show. A terrible, absolutely terrible, hot mess of a show.

But I watched the whole thing, like kind of in a car crashy type way of just like, what is happening? Yeah, but the one undeniable takeaway is that she is like absolutely magnetic and- I know you always said that and made me want to watch it. And then I got scared. It's why I went to see this movie honestly,

cause I was like, I don't want to watch the idol. I'm not mad I watched it. I know. But I'll watch this. I'll watch this. Maybe I probably won't. Maybe I can get Tim to watched it. I know. But I'll watch this. I'll watch this. Maybe I probably won't. Maybe I can get Tim to watch it with me. You definitely could.

You definitely could. Yeah, I think you can. I know, but I don't want to watch it alone. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. You know what I mean? We were supposed to see it the day after Christmas,

but we were all hung over and Joel and our friend Marty went, but Sammy didn't. So I was like, well, I'm not seeing without Sammy. So I didn't see it and I waited until later because I wasn't gonna see it without Sammy. So I get it. Yeah, I get it. Do you guys, does Nosferatu, what does that mean?

Oh, I accept. This was actually in the trivia. It doesn't mean anything, I don't think. They just, the origin. Yeah, I think someone along the, somewhere down the line just invented the word as the name. And the closest, I didn't write it down, so I don't actually know,

but the closest translation was I think for something in Romanian that's close to the word for war. But- Oh, that's interesting. I think it's- Yeah, cause he's like, he's not Dracula. Sorry, Orlok is the closest to... Like Nosferatu has no meaning anywhere, I don't think.

So I think it's like a name, like they invented a name. Like a creature name. Like the creature is... Nosferatu. Okay, that's cool. That's a good name. It's a good name. It sounds spooky as hell. Yeah, it's great. Well, should we get into this recap? I can't wait.

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which is that it's in theaters, just watched it one time. Yeah, I got a really appalled on my end. Emily's going to tackle the first half. I'm gonna tackle the second half. And yeah, big disclaimer, I really could have used a second viewing of this movie, but we're going to get you. It's going to be fine.

But if you- Here's the thing. It's going gonna be fine, but if you- Here's the thing, it's gonna be fine. If you remember every scene of this movie, you might notice some differences in our retelling. But we're gonna do our freaking best. Because it's a lot of similar to like- The lighthouse, I imagine.

It's just a lot of similar moments that could happen at any point in the movie. So when do they happen? Not sure. Because it's like recurring dreams and visions. And yeah, so yeah, so here we go. We'll get you from A to B. We'll get you there and it's going to be fun.

It's gonna be fun. Everyone just strap in, calm down, take a deep breath. Calm down, it's gonna be fine. Okay. Just strap in, calm down, take a deep breath. Calm down is gonna be fine. Okay. We begin. Close up on Lily Rose Depp's striking face.

We stay there the whole movie, I'm already in, baby. And we never leave it. Coincidentally, that's how we start the idol as well. Well, if you got that face, you're gonna wanna start with a face. It's in her contract. It's in her contract. But you put your best foot forward. Exactly.

She's like, come closer, closer to me, closer to me. Her cheekbones are so sharp as to cast shadows. It's wild. It's like a doll's face. Truly, just remarkable, remarkable stuff. Her name is Ellen, and I'm gonna try to call her that, but my color, Lily Rose, so you get it. But she is, she's sitting up in bed,

it's the middle of the night, and she is crying and praying, asking for something to the extent of like, any companion, anyone out there, come to me, come to me. It's unclear, it's not like she's praying to God, but she's just sort of praying like I am alone. Okay, lonely girl. And we hear a spooky deep voice answer.

We just hear this whispered voice and he's like, you have awoken me from my eternal slumber. Whoa, it's that easy? It's that easy? It's honestly, it's too easy and it's completely unfair. This is so unfair to her. It's like, look, it just couldn't, anybody could have answered this.

I wasn't trying to wake you up. If you're this easy to wake up, you are too light of sleeper. Yeah, why? Why me? My God. And we see, she's like sort of like pulled up and out of bed. She's like walking, she's in a nasty nightgown.

Lots of nasty nightgowns in this. Blue, bright blue moonlight. She walks to her window kind of like arms out almost as if in a trance. And we pull back to see that she is like levitating off the ground a little bit. And we see her windows open, her curtains are blowing in the wind.

And every time they blow forward, we see cast behind them a shadow of. No, it's for the image we, you know, no big, tall, spooky, scars guard like monster guy. But when the curtains, you know, pull back, there's nothing there. But every time they pull forward, there's the shadow. So we're seeing him only as a shadow. She's sort of in this tr're seeing him only as a shadow. She's sort of in this trance, cut to she's being,

she's walking or sort of being levitated outside of her house, down a path into the dark night garden while this voice is asking, you know, do you pledge yourself to me? And she says, yes. She lays down on the ground. We're close up on her face. And from her face, it looks like she's having an orgasm.

Like she's just experiencing pleasure. And then all of a sudden we see a nasty, spooky, corpsey hand grab her throat. She opens her eyes and screams. She's like flipped to be face down on the ground. We, I'm not entirely sure how to describe this or if I'm even totally remembering it visually, but it's like we then see under the ground

and we like see a nasty corpse under there. Like they're like on either side of a wall basically, but like facing each other, but the wall is the ground. You get it. I get it, I get it. And she screams and she starts having a seizure and we like sort of pull back

and we just watch her seizing on the ground. The music is probably doing that like, just like high pitched thing. And catch black. And we'd see a Chiron come up that just says years later. Oh no. Okay. So. And we are in Germany in 1838, which I don't know if I used to do it.

And this one, when I was like, I don't know why I was thrown by getting a year. And I was like, 1838, what does that mean? What's happening there? What's 1838? What's the life like? I was like, I got really caught up in like the specificity of 1838 as like a specific year. You know Robert Eggers is doing his research, so we're going to be showing exactly what life is like in 1838. And so, you know, we're seeing gorgeous sets of this, like, you know, we're seeing gorgeous, gorgeous sets of this like, you know, looks, I'm guessing, literally completely exactly like 1838 Germany.

We see a slightly older Ellen in bed with her little cat, Greta, and her husband, Thomas, played by Nicholas Holt. He is getting dressed, getting ready to leave for the day. She doesn't want to leave. They're newlyweds. They're very in love. She's trying to coax him to stay with her.

She's kissing him. He's like, I gotta go. I have to go make something of myself. He seems to have some sort of appointment and it's very make or break. We get the sense either now or a little bit later on that they don't have a lot of money. He's very determined to change that for them,

prove himself to his young bride. And so he gets up, he goes out the door, and after he leaves, she sits up in bed and she has this realization to herself or vision or something. She says, he already has a position, he's going to be sent away or something like that. She like immediately kind of knows

and has this like foreboding about what's about to happen. But we see Thomas going through the streets, showing up to work. It's this real estate office. This is another one where like all the signs are in German and then they're translated and I'm like, but they're speaking English. Like always, it's like you're being so accurate, but then it's like one where like all the signs are in German and then they're translated. And I'm like, but they're speaking English. Like I always, it's like you're being so accurate, but then it's like, but wait a minute, they

can read German, but they speak English. German accents. No, they're, they have British accents, but the accents are great. The accents are good, but I feel like, yeah, that's something that they do now, which I completely understand why they do it. But it's always funny that they have some sort of accent and it's usually not like in Chernobyl. Well, Chernobyl is my favorite

because everyone kind of just does their own thing. Yeah. Yeah, which I do appreciate. Like just go for it, whatever. And it's somehow is not that distracting, but it is. Maybe as like a German person or something it would be more distracting. But as an American, you're like, whatever, it's an accent.

Right. I only thought of it when there's a sign in German that then a chiron translates where I go like, wait, so it is German. Well, and they call him like, Herr Müller a lot or whatever, Herr Hutter, and Herr is like, Mr. in German. And so there's like,

they throw a couple German words in there. Okay. Yeah, you know, whatever. I don't care. But he shows up to work at this real estate office and we know that he's hoping to be made into a partner. Like that will seal his fortune and he'll like make something of himself. And so he goes into the boss's office, the boss's hair knock and hair knock tells him,

I've got a job for you. I feel like they, do they pronounce it K'nock? They might pronounce it K'nock. But it's spelled Knock. Hair K'nock. That's more fun. We're going to call him Hair K'nock. I don't remember what anyone says or does.

That's what I'm saying. Which is great. It's going to be fine. Relax. Relax. It seems good to me so far. I'm good. Relax's gonna be fine. Relax. Relax. It seems good to me so far. I'm good.

Relax. Everything's fine. So Hare Knock tells Thomas, he says, if you do this sale, basically we'll make you partner. There's this rundown estate that this count who lives abroad has requested. He would like to purchase it, but he's too infirm to travel here.

We need someone to travel to him, to sign the deed and sell him this estate. And it gets to be you. And he points it out on a map. It's in Transylvania. It's about a six week journey. And Thomas is not excited about this, but is thinking, okay, this is my chance. I got to do it. Oh,

and Hare Kinnock does say like, Oh, you're a newlywed. So you're eager to, to make your fortune. He keeps calling it Providence. He's like, Oh, Providence, Providence. So Hare Kinnock is seeing like, this is a great opportunity for me to get this guy to go do this thing that nobody would want wanna do. But Thomas agrees and he asks as he's leaving, what's the name of this count?

And Harkinok turns and he says, Orlok, which we know is not good. Thomas returns home to Ellen telling her that he has to take this trip and she freaks out and says, you can't leave, you cannot leave me. There's some mention of that he is aware that she has had troubles in the past. They keep calling it her melancholy. Um, we get the impression that's been like, you know, fits of anxiety of terror, no, we saw what happened before, so we think we know what that is,

but they're thinking that she just has basically anxiety and depression, and she's like, you can't leave me, you can't leave me for six weeks, and she's crying, trying to convince him. He says, I need to do this, I need to do this for us, then we'll have everything we need, that's why I'm doing this,

and she tells him, she like admits to him, I had this dream the night before our wedding. She's like, I have these dreams that they, that are dark and disturbing these thoughts. I had this dream the night before we got married, where I was walking down the aisle towards you, only when I got there, it was death itself. It wasn't you, it was death.

And I turned and I looked and everyone there was dead. My family, you, everyone sitting in the seats, they were all corpses, everyone was dead and I was being married off to death, only I was the happiest I'd ever been in my life. And as she's telling this, she's sobbing, she's so horrified by the imagery and horrified that she was, in her dream, felt happy

because it's awful and scary and bad. And she's basically like, is something really bad is gonna happen if you leave? That's what this dream portends, you cannot leave me. Cut to- They're in a carriage going- Drop it off. Yeah.

At their friend's house, they have these very wealthy friends, Friedrich and Anna, or Anna again, I don't remember. This is Erin Taylor Johnson is Friedrich and Anna is Emma Corrin. And they're married, they have two daughters, she's pregnant with their son. They have this big, gorgeous estate with a Christmas tree.

And we learned that they're all very good friends. Thomas is talking to Friedrich saying, thank you so much for letting her stay here while I'm gone. And I just am eager to make something of myself and I promise I'll pay you back when I can. So we know that he really does need to make this money. Not having enough money has been a big thing for Thomas. And Ellen is looking calmer.

She cuts off, I don't remember if this is now or, I don't remember when exactly this happens, but she like cuts off a piece of her hair and puts it in a little locket for Thomas to take with him. And she comes to him and she gives him this locket and she says, you know, I'm feeling much better now. You know, I think it was just. Just a dream.

Yeah, yeah, it's, don't even worry about it. Everything's fine. I know that you're doing what you have to do and I love you and write to me every single day and take this locket with you. And they're very sweet. They like seem to really, really love each other and they kiss.

He gets on his horse and he rides away. Somewhere around this time, we cut to, we are in, we saw this in the trailer, if you watched the trailer, I do understand this is a podcast, so you probably didn't watch anything. We see a naked hair canok, sitting on the floor of his office,

in the middle of a pentagram looking, carving on the floor with candles all around him. Carving things into his arm, right? Isn't he like poking a knife into his arm, carving things? And he's totally cuckoo and he's all, he's like giddy and maniacal and is like, I did it, I did it, he's coming and you're gonna get with you wanton.

Woo hoo. You know, totally crazed. Not at all like the, you know, buttoned up real estate agent we saw earlier. Now we're seeing like, whoa, what is up with this guy? Do we think that at this point, do we think that like the vampire or the evil spirit or whatever that she summoned in the beginning

a few years ago has just infiltrated everyone in her life? Or like what, do you know what I mean? Is it just a coincidence that Air Knaak happens to also be like, possessed by the same? Is it the same? It's the same. It's not a coincidence. I think this entity...

I mean, we'll get there. This entity is using Air Knaak'll get there. It's obvious. This entity is using Hair Canach to get Ellen. Right, okay, okay. That's yes, okay. It's a long-term plan. Nosferatu has done this, yes. And we'll see. It's very funny that there is like bureaucratic elements to a vampire.

I gotta move in. Taking a lady. Next door. Exactly, it's like, you can't, is there a faster way to do this? No, no, I guess you have to go through everyone. Not in 1830. Not in 1830.

You gotta go the long way. Just before the internet. All right. He couldn't just look it up. How do I make this woman my bride? He only knows the roots he knows about. So, we see Thomas on his long journey. It's cold, he's riding his horse through the woods. We knew this was gonna on his long journey. It's cold.

He's riding his horse through the woods. We knew this was gonna be a long journey. He arrives at an inn. And this honestly, I thought was one of the scariest parts of the movie and a true, a true nightmare. He sees this inn, he starts walking towards it. You know, he's so tired. He needs a rest.

And there's like, there are people outside of the inn. They are referred to at some point as gypsies, but I think they're locals. He's made it almost of the way of his journey. And they're all outside and they all immediately turn their attention to him and are like jostling him and running circles around him as he's trying to make his way to the inn.

They're like playing music at him. Someone I think is juggling. They're just kind of swarming him in this way that's very strange. And then he makes it to the front door of the inn. But before he goes in, all of them, and it's probably like what? 20, 30 people, I'm terrible at this.

20, 30 people. Could be 50, 100, could be five. But it's some quantity of people all stare at him and just start laughing. They all just like break out into laughter clearly at him. And it's so unnerving and would make you feel so bad. I would feel so bad if this happened to me. You're like, man, I'm just so tired.

Why, what's happening? Don't laugh at me. Someone from the inn who runs the inn comes out and he shoes the people away. This is where he's like, go away, gypsies, you're gonna take all my business. And Thomas comes up and he says, I need a place to stay for the night.

I have business at the castle tomorrow. And they're all, everyone in the inn, there's a hush that falls over it and they go like, no, no, no, don't go to the castle and you can't stay here. Like absolutely not. And there's like crosses hanging everywhere and like garlic in the windows and he says, please, I just need a place to stay. I'll pay double. And they're like, well, okay. And a woman takes him to his room and when she takes him there, she says in a language he can't understand understand I don't think but she's talent we see you know translated because here they don't speak English. Don't

go there don't go to that place like please don't go that's evil there don't go don't go don't go. He can definitely tell these people don't want them to go there and that something's up but he's like I what the fuck am I supposed to do like here I am. So I gotta do I gotta make money and I'll to do? Like, here I am. That's what I gotta do. I gotta make money and I'll sacrifice anyone. I'll sacrifice myself. Yeah. So he goes to sleep that night

and he is awoken in the middle of the night by the sound of people outside of his window. He looks out the window and we see presumably the same locals he had interacted with earlier walking into the woods with lanterns. There is a naked woman on a horse, a white horse. They say something about her being a virgin, some translation, and Thomas is mesmerized by this,

and we follow them into the woods where they exhume a corpse. They either dig a hole to get to this corpse or they push a lid off a coffin and stab a stake through the heart of this corpse. The corpse like lunges alive at this and pukes. Oh, uh-oh. And Thomas is like totally,

it like cuts Thomas seeing all this and he's completely freaked out, doesn't know what the fuck he's just seeing. But then he jolts awake in his bed, holding this cross that that old woman had given him and she's like, don't go, don't go, don't go. She like gives him this cross. He's holding it and he's, you know, shakes his head

like, was that a nightmare, what just happened? And he looks down at his freaking shoes, which are all covered in mud from the woods. Oh no, it wasn't just a dream. Maybe it wasn't just a dream, I don't know. But he ventures out, it's the day to go to the castle. He walks out of the inn and there's no one around, not a soul in sight.

Nobody's there. And including his horse is also gone. So he's got to walk up to the castle on foot. And this ain't a closed castle. This castle is, it's up. It's the same as got to answer your background. Again, this is a podcast. You probably can't see that, but it's up a mountain.

And he's, so he's walking, it's cold. He's walking through the woods. Night has fallen. He still looks to be so far away from this castle. He's trudging along and he is walking down this path through the woods and we see in the distance, we hear the hooves of horses and we see this shadowy shape starting to take, come into focus a bit in the distance,

looking like it's coming towards him. And eventually we do see it looks like a horse drawn carriage, but something about it has Thomas absolutely like stuck to the ground. He's staring at it, but he's standing in the middle of the road and this thing is coming at him, but he seems incapable of moving. It's got him transfixed and it's running right up at him. And just before it runs him over, he like closes his eyes to brace for impact, but he again doesn't move.

But he opens his eyes. The carriage is now not running him over. It's a horse-drawn carriage and it's stopped in the road. And the little door to the carriage on its own just opens up inviting him in. Uh-oh, spooky. And he gets in, what else you gonna do? Yeah, this is a man who's not gonna fight back too much.

This is an un-chauffured, unmanned carriage. There's nobody, this is Waymo before Waymo. Yeah. This was. Or the Harry Potter carriages that you couldn't see until you saw someone died. Right, right, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, you guys know. But it's starting to feel as if he's not, it doesn't seem like Thomas is really capable of making decisions with all of these things. Yeah, 100%. Like something is compelling him to continue on that is perhaps beyond his reason.

Yes. But he rides the carriage, takes him to the castle. He arrives, it's really dark. It's really old and really spooky. And he's walking around, he's calling Count. Hello. And we hear a voice say, You are late.

It is past the midnight hour. And Thomas is apologizing him. I'm sorry. It was quite a long journey. He comes to the room with Orlok and is immediately terrified. Like in being in Orlok's presence, he becomes like visibly so scared. And we're only really seeing, we're seeing like shadows and profile. We're not really getting Orlok's face.

We're not, we are not seeing whatever he's seeing that's so scary, but it is obvious that Thomas is completely, completely petrified. And Orlok tells him to sit down, take out the contract. And Thomas says like, shouldn't we go to bed? It's very late. And he's like, no, we're doing this now. Thomas pulls out his contract. Orlok tells him to sit and eat. He's like, sit down, eat. I needed to repeat that. Otherwise he wouldn't have understood

that I meant. He gives him wine to drink too, he's like, drink. And Thomas is really, he's like sweating, he's so scared. And he is trying to cut a piece of bread, I guess, and is so scared that he cuts his finger with the knife and Orlok right away is just right up next to him. I think he, yeah, I think he does like lick the blood off of his finger. He first is like, be more careful. Oh yeah.

Use caution when you do that. You should use caution. This really puts into perspective all my previous jobs. I thought my previous jobs were hard, but nothing was like this. This was really bad. This was so bad. And Orlach licks the freaking blood off his finger,

and when he's up that close to him, he sees the locket that Thomas has that has Lily's hair, sorry, Ellen's, Ellen's hair in it, and Orlok pulls at the locket and he goes, "'You have a bride.'" And he says, yes, and Orlok like smells the locket and it's really nasty. Takes it from him. And then for some reason that I can't really recall,

he presents Thomas with a contract. He's like, okay, I signed yours, now you sign mine. I think there's like a dream sequence in between or- Is that before? Maybe it's before. It's so hard to say. It's really hard to say, you guys, but let's just say that there is,

that he goes to bed for the night, cause it's late, and he has a very scary, creepy, bad, weird dream, that's in the dream. I think it's Ellen is on top of him having sex with him. And then her face gets bloody and then it's actually Orlok on top of him.

And then Thomas screams and wakes himself up and it's morning and everything's fine. But he does look down at his chest where he has a freaky bite mark. Okay, it's not good. It's not good. Then perhaps Orlok presents him with a contract. Yeah, that I think he's like,

I had my person draft up this contract that you need to sign for this sale to go through. Oh, and Thomas is reluctant because it's written in a language he can't understand. He like looks at the contract and is like, what is this? And relax like, don't worry about it. It's written in my language. Just sign, just sign right here. But I need, I need your signature. Okay. And Thomas signs it. No, buddy. But he seems really, really scared. He really doesn't want to.

He doesn't want to do it. Don't make me do it, don't make me do it. But he does, he does do it. He's also feeling really strange physically. Yeah. Perhaps like something bit his chest in the night. And he's really scared and he's like, this isn't right. I don't like this, but I got to sign this contract.

So he does. Right after he signs it though, Orlok goes, we will be neighbors. He's like, I just want a buddy. Now we are neighbors. Do you want to stream a show with me later? If you need a cup of sugar, you know where to find me. We can share wifi.

So Thomas is like, I think I'm gonna go. This was really great, but I gotta go now. And Orlok's like, you cannot, you are not well enough to travel. Yeah, cause he's like, I feel pretty sick. I should get home. I feel pretty sick, I gotta go. And it is bad luck to travel

when you are not in good health. It is a bad omen to travel. I like that he's trying to use like excuses. I think at this point, dude, you could just be like, no. I won't let you. And Thomas is like, please, I'm having the most peculiar dreams. I need, I think I need to believe and our locks like, no, and leaves the room. Matter is settled. And Thomas yells out to him, you still have my locket.

and matter is settled and Thomas yells out to him, you still have my locket. And we're like, don't care. So Thomas is like, I gotta get out of here. I gotta get out of here. And tries to let himself out. He's just trying all the doors. You better believe these doors are locked. He ain't getting out.

This is a big old castle fortress thing. He's not getting out of here. He's in castle fortress thing. He's not getting out of here. He's in the courtyard zone. It's the middle of the night. He's trying to find his way out. He finds a door he hasn't tried and he takes like a big rock and sort of smashes the lock and is able to open the door.

I think it's daytime. It's so dark, it's hard to tell. Maybe it's daytime. Maybe it's daytime. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's like, I'll leave in the morning when I can see the castle better. Yeah, that makes sense.

And Orlok is nowhere to be found. Wonder why. Yeah. Because he's trying to break his way out, gets into this room, breaks open this door, see if he can get out through there. He literally leads down a dark, damp staircase.

So he's going down. He almost slips and falls. He's going down a dark damp staircase. So he's going down, he almost slips and falls. He's going down this dark damp staircase into this dungeon-y dark, dark room. And he sees at the end of this hall, a big sarcophagus, big stone coffin. He approaches it over the top of the coffin, sarcophagus, sarcophagus is that same pentagram thing that Hare Kinnock had, you know, scrawled into his floor. And so Thomas is like, oh shit, this guy's a vampire. And so he grabs, there's like a pickaxe that he finds.

He holds it up. He's like, great, I'm gonna open this fucking sarcophagus. I'm gonna pickaxe Orlok and then I will be good to go. Cause he's also, he's noticed these bite marks on his chest and he's like, yeah, this dude's probably a vampire. He's drank my blood. He speaks like a vampire. All the people with the garlic and the stuff.

The villagers had all these crofts. They don't go there, they don't go there. So he grabs his pickaxe, he pushes the top of the lid off the sarcophagus to reveal, yep, look in there, that's Orlok, naked, buff, looking good, asleep. And he's like, okay, here we fucking go. He looks dead as hell.

This is probably the best look we've ever gotten of him. And he's like, okay, here we fucking go. He looks dead as hell. This is probably the best look we've ever gotten of him. And he's like, you know, nasty. Thomas raises that pickaxe, goes to stab it down into his heart, went up from the sarcophagus, or locks hand, grabs the pickaxe. He stands up in the sarcophagus.

He's really tall. He's Bill Skarsgard. He's a big tall freak. Six-four. Six-four freak. Naked with a, if you see full frontal, it's a prosthetic. Oh, too bad. Dead penis.

It'd be so funny if that was Bill Skarsgard's actual penis. They put like dead makeup all over his actual penis. No, he just has a dead penis. He just has a dead penis. He was like, oh my God, wait, I shouldn't play Thomas. I should play Orlick because I have a actual penis. No, he just has a dead penis. He just has a dead penis. He was like, oh my God, wait, I shouldn't play Thomas. I should play Orlok because I have a dead penis. This is actually perfect for me.

And Thomas is like, oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck, starts trying to run away. Orlok gets up and out of his sarcophagus, puts on his cloak, and he's got these mean big dogs that start chasing Thomas. They're like wolf-ish. Yeah, they're big and scary. Thomas manages to get out and shut the door.

I mean, we know again, I guess if it's daytime, Orlok can't leave that room right now. But it must be nearing nightfall because he escapes, he makes it up to his room, he's looking for a way out, he can't get out, he can't get out. Orlok comes into his room, pins him down, and starts drinking blood from his chest, takes a big old bite, and he's drinking.

From his chest, ugh. Is this kind of the first time we get a good look at it? This is the first time we see it really happening. Because it's a really way of sucking blood that I feel like I hadn't seen before. It's like from the chest. Right from the center of your chest. Like your heart.

Like your breastbone. It would like break your rib cage. Yeah, your breastbone, yeah. Yeah, and he's hunched over the body like it's. Very like gollum-y. It's very, yeah, gollum-y. It's nasty. It's way nastier than the neck.

You know what, it takes kind of like the sexual aspect out of it a little bit. Like I feel like when it's the neck, it's like a little sexual. And you can hear him inhaling the blood. It's very like. Yeah, it's really. But it's like very throaty.

It's like May eating. May makes the craziest noises when she eats. It's probably just like May eating. There's a lot of breathing in the audible breathing in this movie. Oh yeah. When, when any, every time he speaks. Oh my God, I was feeling out of breath

when Orlok was speaking. He goes like, he's fairly like, he goes like, he's fairly like, he goes like, he's fairly like, he goes like, he's fairly like, he goes like, he's fairly like, he goes like, he's fairly like, he goes like, he's fairly like,

he goes like, he's fairly like, he goes like, he's fairly like, he goes like, he's fairly like, he goes like, he's fairly like, he goes like, he's fairly like, he goes like, he's fairly like, he goes like, he's fairly like, he goes like, he's fairly like, he goes like, he's fairly like, he goes like, he's fairly like, he goes like, he's fairly like, he goes it kept making me feel like, remember I had to breathe sitting in the movie theater because it's like so intense, his nasty breathing.

And he sort of in voiceover or like in his head or saying to Ellen as he's drinking Thomas's blood, your husband is lost to you. So yeah, I mean, it's not looking good. We cut to Ellen going for a seaside walk with Anna and Friedrich and the girls. And she's thanking Anna for, thank you for letting me stay with you.

I just didn't wanna be alone without Thomas and Anna's, they clearly have a real lovely friendship, the two of them and Anna really cares for her and also seems to know about Ellen's previous melancholy and is happy to have her there with her. The kids start running around and Anna and Friedrich go to follow them. And just then we hear a scream. We look over and Ellen is seizing on the ground.

Not well. So they call their doctor to the house. They've got Ellen in bed. Friedrich calls Dr. Sievers to come and see her. And they tell Dr. Sievers that, you know, it's at night she's been having these terrors. She like seizes up, speaking like nonsense in the middle of the night. So he basically just gives her a bunch of opioids and says, like, just keep drugging

her. And yeah, he has her sleep in a corset because he says like, it'll be, that'll help her. Just put this corset on her. And she, we're going to drain some of her blood because I think the problem is probably she has too much blood. They used to do that. I'm a doctor, I'm a doctor. I'm a doctor. Yeah, I'm a doctor and we're draining her blood. Doctor Sivers, by the way, played by Hot Dad from The Witch.

Hot Dad from The Witch. Talking to Hot Dad from this movie, Aaron Taylor Johnson. True, Hot Dad in real life, Aaron Taylor Johnson. Yeah. We see the next morning, perhaps, Thomas coming to, he's still alive, but he's pretty fucked up. And he manages to escape out the window of his room. The dogs are coming to chase him.

I think Orlock is coming to like, okay, time for you to be all the way dead now. Yeah, finish the job. And he escapes out his window, but the window is like a tiny, tiny little ledge, and in him trying to escape off this ledge or figure out what to do, he falls off the ledge, obviously,

and plunges into the sea. So, better than plunging onto the ground, but he falls into some water. But not dead yet. Not dead yet, we see, again, there might have been something that happened, maybe more seizures, maybe Ellen's still doing bad, but we see Thomas' body wash up on shore and get discovered by some nuns.

Oh, nuns. Not bad people to discover you. Great. They take him to their convent. That's the right word, yeah. And start nursing him back to health. They seem, they know what's up. They know what has happened here.

They know about Coralock. Oh my God, this fucking vampire. And they're tending to him. They're like spraying holy water on him and holding crosses and chanting. It's Sydney Sweeney. Exactly, Sydney Sweeney's there. Ciao. Ciao, ciao. Exactly, Sydney Sweeney's there. Ciao.

Ciao, ciao, ciao. Ciao, ciao. And he jolts away. He means to come for Ellen. And he gets up and he's like, I gotta go, I gotta go get my wife. They're like, you are really ill, you can't leave. And he says, I gotta go, I gotta go.

Stumbles onto his horse. He is really not looking good. He had a bunch of his blood drank by a vampire, but he is off to get back to Elin. Now he knows what's up. They say at some point that it's like safe there that the shadow can't reach him there. Like once you leave these walls,

the shadow, his shadow will be able to reach you. Yeah. So he respects the rules of not going inside the church. I don't know, he likes bureaucracy, he likes rules. He really does. Okay, at some point, Ellen is now getting very anxious in her waking hours about Thomas. She said there's been no letters.

She's like certain that Thomas is dead or something terrible has happened. Friedrich thinks she's just getting herself worked up. He's like, it's fine, it's fine. I'll go talk to Herkanok. I'm sure everything's fine. I'll go talk to his boss. It's all fine.

Well, turns out Herkanok has been institutionalized because he was found eating live sheep. Okay, that's funny. He was discovered biting into live sheep. Wait, is that the same guy we saw in the trailer biting the bird? Yes. Okay. We're about to see that.

We're about to see that right now. So Friedrich and Dr. Sievers are like, let's go see what's up with Hare Canok. They find him in his little cell. Really not nice. And we had seen him get brought in earlier at some point. And it's not nice treatment that they're giving him in these times. They do say we don't usually put people down

in these horrible dungeons. And they're like, I don't wanna put this guy in the horrible dungeon. This guy's pretty freaky. And he is, yeah, he's ranting and raving. They bring him in to the dungeon. And yeah, Friedrich and Dr. Seaver has come to see him. And he's got a whole row of dead pigeons

that he's been eating, taken little bites out of. He's sitting on the ground, he's holding another live pigeon, and he tells them that his master is coming, and he's so excited, and he's like, he's coming, he's coming, and he takes a bite of a pigeon's head, and I think it's Dr. Sievers who says, now my good man, why would you do a thing like that?

He really made me laugh. Why would you do a thing like that? I thought that also biting the pigeon head off looked really good. Nasty. And it sounded, you can hear the like crunchy little bones. It's like, how did they do it? I mean, gross.

I know he didn't actually eat a pigeon's head, but it looks pretty real. Yeah, it's nasty. And so Dr. Sievers says, you know, perhaps we should talk to my friend who is, he was my teacher, my mentor, and the best doctor I've ever known. He did kind of get excommunicated

because he is obsessed with the occult, but perhaps. Might be a good person. Something weird seems to be going on here. Let's talk to him. We go talk to him and you better believe that's Willem Dafoe. Yay, I was wondering when we were gonna see. His name is Dr. Von Franz. He's just standing in a room with his penis as a tripod.

That's the first shot of him. He's taking a nap leaning on his penis. And they go to see him and convince him to come and take a look at Ellen. And so he comes to visit Ellen's bedside and immediately is horrified that they've tied her up. And Friedrich is like, she was freaking out. Like, I don't know, tied her up. And he's like, she was freaking out. Like, I don't know, tied her up.

And he's like, untie this child. And then, and he also demands they stop drugging her. He's like, she is not having seizures. She's not having fits. She is like, she's in trance. She's in a trance. She's somewhere else. And we will only learn what's going on with her

if we let her fully go into that trance. So stop drugging her, untie her. They hold like a light to her pupils and her pupils don't contract. So it's like, she's not here. That's, she's in a different place. That's cool. And to really prove that point, he takes a needle

and he, a big needle and like stabs it all the way through her arm. I feel like he could have proved it. And pulls it back out. In a different way. I know, but she doesn't react at all. He's like, see, she's like not here. And so they, he's like, we need to observe her trance.

She goes into this trance. She says the same thing that Haruka Naka said, like he's coming, he's coming. She does really, her physical acting is so good. She like sits up in bed and is clearly in another place and opens her mouth really wide and sticks her tongue out in this way and it's like, bleh.

I do not know how she did it. It's really intense. I wonder if there was any added little bits of VFX in it because it looks crazy. Her eyes roll up into her head. And I mean that part of feeling you can't do. Yeah, she's, it's, she's, it's clear to anybody observing which is all of them that like, oh, something's up.

Like something's really up. And she kind of comes back to where she's like present enough that Von Franz is like, tell me what you're seeing. Tell me, you know, my child, talk to me, talk to me, where are you? And she basically reveals that she's like, he's been haunting me since my childhood. You know, he's coming, he's coming for me.

Gives him enough information to be like, something evil has been possessing me and he's coming here. And he tells him, has been possessing me and he's coming here. And he tells Sivers and Three-Drick and Anna, he's like, keep an eye on her. He tells Anna, stay with her at nights, observe her visions, like write down what she's seeing. Like I believe that she's not mad, this isn't melancholy, she is like seeing something

that we need to be aware of, like something bad is coming. And he's gonna try to figure out what it is. And everyone believes now and it's on the same page? Kind of, Friedrich isn't really, he's not a big fan of this occult stuff, but Anna is convinced. Okay. Because she's just seen it happen.

And the rest of them, Severs is convinced too. He's sort of like, man, I don't know what the fuck this is. Like something really weird is happening. Right. Yeah. They are determined now to figure out as much as they can about like what is she seeing? What is this entity? What is she talking about?

And they say, well, something's up with Herakhanok, obviously. So let's go check out his office and like see if we can find any information about what this entity might be like he said Something's coming. She said something's coming. Let's find out what it is So they start raiding here Canucks office trying to find it They open a cabinet where there's like a skull a dead like a dead head and like all this all these markings It's like oh, it's in here Like whatever the answers is right here and they pull a big spooky book out that has that same pentagram

Etched in the top and they open it and this book out that has that same pentagram etched in the top and they open it and this is old spooky book that's talking about Nosferatu and we see a picture and it don't it's mostly just words but there is one image like painted in the book of like a big nasty corpse on top of a beautiful young woman, like killing her, slash fucking her. And so Von Francis is like, Oh, I know what this is. This is this is Nosferatu. Oh, wow. OK. All right. Meanwhile, back in Transylvania,

Count Orlok is being packed away to like, I don't know. I don't actually know how this starts, but he is in a little wooden crate. Like a shipping container. That's headed to Germany, stowed away below deck. And it seems like, yeah, this part of Dracula. I know they made the last voyage of the Demeter recently. They did.

Very much those vibes. A vessel. Vessel. Love much those vibes. A vessel. Vessel. Love to see it. Love to see it, yay. So he's coming. He's bought the house. So he is on his way, just like they all said.

And back to the prison cell where Knok is being held, a guard comes in to check on him. I think here's some loud banging or yelling or something. And he's screaming like, help me, help me. Yeah, and so he goes in and sees that the chair that he's tied to has fallen over. And yeah, Kanoke is playing like, oh, I've fallen and I'm hurt, help me.

He's like, has like foam coming out of his mouth. He like looks really like vomiting or like, yeah. Yeah, seizing or something. So the guard runs to his side to try to help him. And as soon as he's close enough, Knok reaches up with his mouth and bites his throat. Okay. That just reminded me, if anybody knows,

I will send it to you guys. My very favorite Smothers Brothers song, which I love Smothers Brothers. I love the Smothers Brothers. I grew up on them. I've heard of the Smothers Brothers. They were a sibling musical comedy duo in like the 60s, but they have this one song called Mediocre Fred and it's so fucking funny.

I'm gonna send it to you, anyway. If anybody knows it, shout out Mediocre Fred, it's really, really fun. I'm curious how that has to do with whatever's happening here. You'll know immediately once I send it to you. Eric Knoch is not a vampire or anything though, right? He's just- No, no. He's kind of the Renfield stand-in.

That's the vampire, what we do in the shadows. They do it, he's what's space is. What is that called? I'm gonna call it a cuck. I feel like he's a vampire cuck. He's a vampire cuck. He's like the human companion who thinks that if they do everything that they'll be turned into a vampire eventually.

Familiar. Familiar, yes. So yeah, we cut to him having escaped from the prison, dancing down the streets of Germany. Little naked butt. Little naked butt and like essentially clicking his heels and jumping for joy. It's so funny.

This guy's, I think my favorite part of the whole movie. This is Simon McBurney, excellent performance. And so now we see back on the ship where Count Orlok is, sailors on the ship are starting to come down with the plague. And we're a little like, are to come down with the plague. And we're a little like, are they coming down with the plague or are they being killed by the vampire? And it doesn't like ever super clearly say which witch,

it's kind of a two for one situation. Seems like Count Orlok just kind of carry the plague with him. Yeah, I think it was like in the book. I think Von Franz says that at some point that he's like, Nosferatu is a plague carrying vampire. So it's like kind of one and the same, which is like, pick one. You can't be both, you asshole.

So we're seeing some like nasty wounds on these sailors, rats everywhere again. They're panicking, trying to throw dead bodies off the side of the ship. But think about plagues. They really, they spread fast. They don't know a lot about medicine as per the corset. Try draining some of the blood. Just put a corset on her.

And one of the sailors seems to know, there's like, well, there's evil aboard this ship and I am going to go kill the source of our problem. And I'm like, how did he get on the ship? I gotta see the last voyage of the Demeter. But he goes below deck to where the crate is that we have seen before that we know Count Orlok was in. And as he's approaching it with an axe or something, it's really dark and spooky down there, obviously.

And he's moving towards it. He looks really scared, but determined to kill this motherfucker with the plague. And as he's getting close to it, we see Count Orlok's naked back, like illuminated by some moonlight behind him as he's draining someone of blood. So you just kind of see his hunched frame going like. So like out of the crate? He's like not in there. He's out of the crate, baby.

He's out of the crate. Okay. He's not in there. So the guy eventually makes it of the crate. He's like not in there. He's out of the crate. Hell, he's out of the crate. Okay. He's not in there. So the guy eventually makes it to the crate, opens it up, it's empty and- No, it's not empty. It's full of rats. Oh, full of rats.

It's full of rats. They come spilling out of that crate, running everywhere. Nasty plague rats. Plague rats. I still think they're pretty cute. Pretty cute. It is interesting though, this was a moment where I started thinking about my cognitive dissonance,

I guess, about rats versus mosquitoes, because rats are like very disease carrying. That's true. Yeah. Creatures. But it still is the mosquitoes' fault. The mosquitoes bite the rats, I think. Oh. I mean, I do think the rats are probably kind of nasty

on their own, but I still think it's tied to mosquitoes. I would love that if we could just still keep it all pinned on mosquitoes. Also, rats are cute and smart. Yeah, they are. Mosquitoes aren't cute or smart. No. Okay, so I'm right about everything.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I feel much better now. So this guy is, yeah, attacked. He's fucked. He's attacked by Orlok, attacked by rats. And we get the sense that hell is being unleashed on this whole crew. There ain't gonna be any survivors of this situation.

Dang, who's gonna sail the ship? Well, maybe nobody. And we do see eventually that it crashes right into that harbor. Oh, okay. Rats running from that ship in every which way. Yep. Meanwhile, Thomas has also arrived home

back to Germany on horseback. He is looking rough. He did not finish healing with the nuns. So he is in and out of like delusions as well, kind of seeming like he's dipping in and out of consciousness. But I kind of don't remember their reunion. Obviously she's very happy to see him,

but I think it's pretty quickly like we got gotta get him in bed and tend to him. Yeah, she like wakes up screaming and then runs outside where he has collapsed on the ground. She like senses that he's there because she has this sort of psychic ability. And yeah, brings him in, but he is not, he ain't doing good. Yeah.

We see Knok is rowing a little boat down the river towards the Count's new abode, new like dilapidated nasty rundown castle, being like, I'm gonna get it ready for you, master. It's gonna be so nice when you get here. And then we see Orlok does arrive at his castle And then we see Orlok does arrive at his castle and Knok is basically like, it's everything. Like you said, the girl is here, like ready for the taking.

And Count Orlok says, well, she has to agree by her own free will to be my bride. It will not work if she is forced. Oh, well, that's like kind of a big deal, dude. Cause yeah, the contract that he made Thomas sign was basically dissolving Thomas's marriage to her. Oh, that makes sense. So now he's like, okay, great.

Now she is unwed. Now that the bureaucracy is out of the way. Now we can do another wedding, but she must agree. Wait, so she's at the house that he bought? No, she, it's just in the same town. He's their neighbors. I see, oh, okay. She is still at Friedrich and Anna's,

along with now Thomas, who they're nursing back to health. Sharing Wi-Fi with Orlok. Orlok, yeah. Exactly. So we see back at Friedrich and Anna's house, Anna is putting her kids to bed. They've had a few moments of being very scared of a monster. They're like, mommy, there's a monster, a monster, a monster. And we're all kind of like, ooh, there is a monster. But she's like, you guys just say your prayers

and go to bed. And she tucks them in. But she's like, you guys just say your prayers and go to bed and she like tucks them in. But she's a little freaked out too, because freaky things are happening. And so she's in the hallway of their house with a little lantern looking down a hall and there's this long panning shot of her looking all the way down the hall and then slowly all the way back. This is like the most paranormal activity-y moment.

And as she gets back to where she started, Ellen, Ellen? Ellen. Ellen, yeah, it does feel wrong. It does feel wrong. It does feel wrong, but it was her name. Well, because Anna, Anna calls her Lenny a lot. Oh yes. That feels better.

It's a cute nickname for Ellen. Even when you first said Ellen, I was like, that doesn't feel like the right name. It took me so long to know what her name was. Yeah. I had no idea what her name was for such a long time. Yeah. And Ellen standing right there,

jump scare startles Anna. And I don't know where Friedrich is at this point, but he's out for the night for some reason. Maybe he's with Von Franz somewhere. I think he's, um, cause he's in, his money comes from shipping. He says that at some point, I think he's been called to see what's up at the port, which is that there's a bunch of plague rats that crashed into the harbor. So he's dealing with that. Yeah.

And so Ellen asks if she can sleep with Anna because they're both spooked. She says, can I sleep with you tonight? Thomas is like having his fever dreams and is not well. So. So they get in this big four poster bed together and are saying, your friendship is so dear to me. And they do have a very sweet friendship, it seems.

And they fall asleep. And then Count Orlok appears to Ellen. We see his like shadowy hand cast over, like the shadow of his hand cast over all of the town, like making its way to her room, which is really cool. And that's a big thing I remember from the original is like, it's very, his shadow is a big part of the motif. Yeah, it's like, and he's got spooky little nasty clawed,

long fingery hands. Yeah, really long fingers and long nails. And it wakes her up and he appears as if he's in the room with her. And I feel like these moments are maybe black and white, but again, I can't tell. Hard to say. They're very, really close to black and white,

if not black and white. And he's now saying, you know, I'm here and I'm ready to get married basically. And he's now saying, you know, I'm here and I'm ready to get married, basically. Let's do this. Let's end this thing that you started. And she is now really disgusted by him on like sees that he's like a horrible monster. Not that she like loved him before, but into it, yeah. There, it's like she's. She was a lonely child and now she's.

She was a lonely child and now she's. At the beginning, she had talked about how all of her nightmares and night terrors, which were real visions of Orlok, ended when she married Thomas. So that's also why I think she was so panicked about him leaving, because Thomas has been her soul. Being in love with someone else has, I think it's why her marriage needed to dissolve

in order for Orlek to come back, because it's like, she can't have two men in her life. It's one or the other. And when he signed those papers, I wonder if that's when her visions got really back. Yeah, okay, got it. Right. Okay, wow, bureaucracy really does play a heavy hand.

Marriage is powerful and important. That's fascinating. So she's saying, I'll never be yours. You disgust me. I abhor you. And he's like, but your husband signed you over to me. Like he doesn't care about you. He signed you away on a piece of paper.

And she's like, you're lying, I don't believe it. And they're getting kind of close and there's some sexual tension, but I'll be honest, not enough. Not enough. He's like not hot enough. There should have been the nose for a two design. I think she just could have been a little bit hotter.

Still nasty. It could have been. I have some, I take some issue with the creature design. Yeah, there's not enough sexual tension here. Not for me. So she's saying, no, I'm not gonna fucking do that. And he's like, you must come to me of your own free will. And if you do not, every night I will kill somebody you love.

So kind of an interesting interpretation of free will. So tells her she has three days and he's gonna kill somebody she loves every night until she agrees of her own free will to be with him. Of her own free will. Up to you, up to you. So the vision ends, we see her waking up in the morning and-

He does tell her, he was like, this was the first. Oh, this is the first night. To have two more nights. And Ellen wakes up in bed, looks over, sees that Anna is not there and has a confused look on her face, kind of slowly, she's hearing something at the edge of the bed and slowly peers over and the camera is just on Ellen's face

as she sees whatever is down there and screams of the bed and slowly peers over and the camera's just on Ellen's face as she sees whatever is down there and screams, great scream, and we reveal that Anna is on the floor being bitten by, like covered in like 10 plague rats being bitten. And she's like half hurt, nightgown has come off a little bit. And so it reminded me of the scene in The Witch

where the crow is like biting the nipple. It has like rats biting her boobs essentially. Gross, gross. Pretty awful image. And now Ana's got the plague. We're seeing the plague spreading all around the town, people dying in the streets. And it's funny how our brains have changed since COVID

because I'm just like, not a mask in sight. And everyone's just like getting up in everyone's faces. Like, I think this guy's got the plague. Like, come over here. I know. And yeah, and like Frusica was like lying in bed with Ana while she has the plan. I'm like, get, get her away.

You can't do that. So yeah, there's just dead bodies strewn about the city, zero sanitation. It's spreading like wildfire. At some point we're seeing von Franz is still doing his reading of this book that they discovered and he's trying to find a way to end this plague. Oh yeah, cause all the bodies that they're finding

of plague victims, they definitely have the plague, but they also have no blood left in their bodies. And so, right, right, right. They're like, this is not normal. This is connected to Nosferatu. When he goes, the plague will go. And there's a passage in this book that says, basically, if he gets the object of his desire,

he'll leave everybody alone. So, he just needs to get exactly what he wants and then everyone else will be free of the plague. Classic power hungry man, just give him exactly what he wants and then everything else will be free of the plague. Classic power hungry man. Just give him exactly what he wants and then everything will be fine. Oh, he's asking first exactly what he wants. Have your own free will.

It's not so hard to just give me the thing I want. Mm-hmm. Give it to me. So back at Anna and Friedrich's, we see, yes, Anna is in bed with the plague, stuck in bed with the plague. Friedrich is snuggled up super close next to her, kissing her, caring for her. Getting the plague too.

And she's asking, can I see the girls? Can I see my daughters? And he's like, um. No, I can see them. I can see you and see them, but you can't see them. Babe, oh, I wish you could, but you have to, you have to plague. So, and he's at this point getting pretty angry

with Ellen and the whole situation. Like you've brought this into my house. Obviously all this is happening. Cause them, he's like, I want you out of my house. There's a moment where situation, like, you've brought this into my house. Obviously, all this is happening because of them. He's like, I want you out of my house. There's a moment where Ellen is like, why don't you like me? You've never liked me. And he's like, I need you out. She's like, Thomas isn't well yet.

He's like, I don't care. You need to just leave. He's not wrong, honestly. Yes, I mean, I would've kicked them out a while ago, to be honest. Yeah. Like, mm, Thomas is back time out a while ago, to be honest. Yeah. Like, Thomas is back. Time for you guys to go to your own house now. I'll help you out getting there. But yeah, anyways, whatever.

Now they're being kicked out. We see them trudging down these bleak streets. People dying, people being bodies in carts. Yes. Thomas is kind of half, he's looking like half recovered. She's still supporting him, like holding him upright, but he's kind of able to mostly walk on his own, but you know, not ideal. They get back to their house and I think, I can't remember, but she's like caring for

him eventually he's like caring for him eventually, he's like pretty much himself again, so that they're able to have a conversation that kind of quickly devolves into a fight, where she's like, I told you not to go. This is like the whole thing that I said that this was gonna happen. But it's getting so mean at points

that it seems like it's maybe not fully her that she's a little bit under the pull of Count Orlok, who's making her be a little extra vicious to her husband. I think this is where she tells him about the deal she made with him as a child, and she's crying, I was lonely. But she's kind of going back and forth between herself and this kind of possessed version of herself. There's a moment where she's like, you would never please me the way he could please me, which seems like not. Not true. Not true at all.

I can't imagine that's true. Nicholas Holt? I think he could. And she's convulsing in this, she does this, holds her hands to her chest and it's really, yeah, just like very physical. It's like screams and like- Inhuman moment, movements and yeah, she like rips her dress. Tearing her clothes off her body, it's really intense. But you know, Thomas is like, I love you no matter what.

And I, you know, don't care what you did as a kid. I love you now and I'm gonna be here for you and support you. But yeah, at the moment, yeah, I don't remember the order of this conversation because when she says, you could never please me the way he could, he kind of gets this look like,

we'll fucking see about that. And like, yeah, starts ripping off her clothes and fucking her and she's like, harder, like, bite me or whatever. She's making it crazy sex. It seems like they've never had sex like this before, but it's also seeming like she's trying to show Count Orlok this and be like, fuck you to him.

And that night we see, we go back to Anna and Friedrich's house, this is night number two, we see the shadow of Count Orlok's nasty fingers wave over Friedrich's sleeping face in bed and he says, do not wake. And then we hear the daughters in the other room screaming and Anna is trying to shake Friedrich awake and she's going, Friedrich, Friedrich, Friedrich. So crazy to sleep in bed with someone that has the plague.

It's so funny, so funny. Oh my God, but he is obviously not waking up because he is under a spell, and Anna is caught in this moment of like, fuck, like I need to go help my kids, but I have the plague. And eventually, I mean, he's just not waking up and their screams are getting louder and like blood curdling and she just, she gets up, she runs into their room,

she opens these double doors to see what is truly a pretty horrifying sight. Sorry, Henley. It's okay. As soon as they were daughters, I was like, that's the things things aren't going to end well for those daughters. Yeah, it's really a horrible image of him.

He has one, Count Warlock is in the room with them, has one basically in each hand, has drained the blood from both of them and just kind of like drops them like ragdoll, like they're drained ragdolls. They are dead. Dead, dead, dead. And drops them to the ground, turns to face Anna who screams, another great scream, a lot of really great screams in this movie,

and he lunges for her and cuts away, but. She's done so. He killed, she did, she did. He was like, you're going to have crazy sex. I'm going to kill your best friend and her kids. Yeah. Yep. Oh, we cut to the funeral, I think.

And tiny little coffins really sad. Wow. This is so, is that like literally the next day? It seems pretty quick. I think it is literally the next day because of the timeline of the three days situation. So they really got their shit together pretty quick. Wow, okay. I mean, the funeral is really just them, you know?

It's not like a big ceremony, but you gotta put those bodies in some coffins because they're not gonna be good. I guess that's true. The burial industry is probably running like a well-oiled machine at this point because there's just people dropping dead left and right. And they're rich, so they could also,

they already had like a tomb at the ready. Yeah. Friedrich is doing really, really bad, obviously, and sobbing, he's really angry at Ellen and Von Franz and just the world and is really upset. Von France is kind of, Ellen I think almost looks like she's gonna go try to console him and Von France is like,

no, no, I don't think it's gonna help. Like holds her back to talk to her for a bit. I'm a little fuzzy on how the plans get arrived at, but he does. Is Severin still there? The doctor? Sivers. Sivers. Yes. And-

It's Sivers and, yeah, uh, yes, I think he is. Basically Von Franz tells them and Thomas that to get rid of Orlok, that he must be stabbed in his original coffin where he sleeps at night. And that, I think they do talk to Friedrich at this point because they're like, so Friedrich, you know that this shit's fucked up, right? Like this isn't just regular stuff. We gotta do something.

And Von Franz says that in all the, everything he's learned about Nosferatu, he's always asleep, he's always back in his sarcophagus before the cock crows. So they have to... Keep him out into the sun? Yeah, he had to be in the sun or they're like, we have to kill him before the sun goes down

when he'll be in his coffin. So they make a plan to go after him and get him in his coffin. Yeah. But then Von Franz does pull, no, Ellen pulls Von Franz aside and is like, let me walk you to your door. Let me talk to you for a minute.

Okay. And so everybody's grabbing their gear to go to Orlok's house. I don't know, we need probably some weapons or something. It's like, okay, meet back here in five or whatever. And this is third night, so this is it. And- Sorry, when Ellen pulls Von Franz aside,

she tells him and he, she's sort of like, I know it has to be me. And he says- Oh, see I totally missed this part. Cause when at, well, yeah, we'll get there. Yeah, so before they're getting their gear, they're like, okay, everybody go get your gear. We'll meet back at five.

And she's like, let me walk you to your door, von Franz. And she tells him it needs to be me. And he's like, it does, it needs to be you. I'm positive you're the only person who can end this. And so they sort of have their own silent agreement that yes, Von Franz is gonna go with the men to Orlok's castle, but Von Franz and Ellen both know that that's not what's gonna do it.

Like she's gonna have to give Orlok what he wants. And yeah. So everyone's gone their separate ways. give Orlok what he wants. And yeah. So... Everyone's gone their separate ways. Friedrich is alone at the tomb. And he walks in and opens the coffin, Anna's coffin. And we see her dead body and he's crying. And he leans in and kisses her and just kind of like

lays on top of her and then everybody else is coming back to the meeting spot where the hell's Friedrich and they see that the door to the tomb thing is open and they go inside and we see yeah yeah, Friedrich laid upon his wife's corpse. He is now also dead. It didn't seem like he fucked her. Oh, I don't know if he fucked her. I think he, they're like, he's like spooning her. Yeah. Okay. He's, yeah, sort of like that Yoko Ono and John. Yes. Lenin.

I was, thank you. I I was gonna say John Legend. Yoko Ono and John Legend. Yeah, he's like over her like that, but he's got a boil on his head. He's, he got the plague. He got plagued. He got plagued. Oh man, all right.

So they discover this and they're like, we need to burn the bodies. So they discover this and they're like, we need to burn the bodies. And so they grab their little torches and light it up. And now this is taking a little longer than expected. And so now it's getting dark. And I think, why can't I remember the doctor's name? Hot dad from the Witch.

Seavers. Seavers is like, maybe we should wait till morning because like, what if he comes out? Thomas says, no, I will not wait a moment longer. We're rushing over there right now. We got to do this. Okay. So they set off to Count Warlock's castle. We see Ellen in her room, getting up looking kind of determined.

She knows that come nightfall, he will be coming to see her. Oh, and he's told her, not just is he gonna take something every night, he told her that if she doesn't agree, he's gonna kill Thomas. Oh. So she knows that it's basically her or Thomas.

Oh, so sad. So she- Wait, this movie has a happy ending, right? Yeah, just wait. Okay. We see him coming for her again with the shadow moving across. She invites him this time.

Oh yes, she says, she calls to him. Come to me. She like puts on a white dress. She makes herself look bridal. Yeah, and she says, I'm ready. She's calling him. We see his shadow moving across the stairs of the building below very like the 1922,

his famous image of his fingers reaching out in shadow. He's making his way up the stairs. You see his shadow of his hand reach the doorknob and open the doorknob. Door slowly swings open, revealing Ellen standing, holding her head high at the ready, and she welcomes him in. Back to our crew going to Count Orlok's house. They find the coffin room that he sleeps in and they're approaching it. I think Thomas has the knife that he's going to stab him with. And there's rats absolutely everywhere in this room. This is the 2,000 rats.

They have to, I'm like surprised, well, not surprised because rats are smart and would know how to avoid being stepped on, but like looks literally hard to walk through the amount of rats that are on the floor. Yeah. Oh. I was thinking about this shot too. I feel like, because once they're actually walking, we're like waist up on them that I wonder if there were like guards. Probably.

You know, like there had to have been a place where rats weren't going. Yeah, because I was like worried about the safety of the rats underfoot. But then I was like, oh, they're not showing us their feet. I bet there's some sort of rat prevention system here where they're walking. But the rats are everywhere. Yes. Yikes. But they make their way to the coffin that he sleeps in. They push open the lid and without even looking, just immediately start stabbing. And inside is not Count Orlok, it is Erkanok.

Oh, brother. Is he a vampire yet? No, he's still human. He's devastated and he's crying like, he was supposed to turn me into the prince of rats. Is that what he says? He says something funny. I don't think so, but let's say him.

Let's say that, yeah. And he's- He sort of realizes he was fucking- Yeah, played. He's really sad about it. And he's really like going on and on about all the ways that Count Orlok has slighted him. And I feel like Von Franz at one point

just kind of gives Thomas a little like, come stab him, stab him all the way. So they kill him. They like take a hammer to the stake and like push it in deeper to kill him. It's gnarly. And at this moment, Thomas realizes that Count Orlok is obviously going to be going for Ellen.

Von Franz looks like not shocked by this news. And Thomas realizes that he has been played and he's like, you knew this. And Von Franz reassures him, he says, this was Ellen's choice, she wanted to do this. Still, obviously Thomas runs out of there, charging over to save his wife, leaving Vend-France to burn this whole place down,

a lot of burning buildings down. And back with Ellen and Orlok, she, I think, does a verbal agreement. I willingly accept you as my husband, I suppose. I don't know what she says. Yeah, I think she says, like, I pledge myself to you. Yeah, always. And she disrobes and lays in bed.

And it's like... Well, I mean, obviously it's not horny, but I feel like, yeah, there could have been a world in which this was like a little bit horny. Yeah, I just think it could have been, that's the whole point of vampire shit is like, I feel like there is an element of the women being like drawn to, both horrified and desiring it.

And yeah, I mean, there were moments earlier where it looks like up on her face, she is experiencing some sort of pleasure from these interactions with Orlok, but it's not, it ain't enough. It's not enough. And she honestly doesn't even look that horny. Yeah, they should feel like,

strong to each other. There should be so much tension there. And there just isn't as much as I would like personally. It's really just only very upsetting. Yeah. And I mean, there's like positives to that. Like this is at a face value, a very upsetting scene. And so I guess there's merit in it being played as upsetting

but it is yeah, just different from what we're used to in terms of vampire sex scenes. And we also know Bill Skarsgard has a lot of potential to be very hot as a monster. So for them to just disregard that is really a shame. Well, we haven't mentioned, they gave him a little mustache. Oh no.

I would say a pretty big mustache. Yeah, big mustache. Wait, really? Yeah. Just like Tim? Oh my God. It's just like Tim. Tim's in his Orlok era.

No, it's like, it's the big and bushy and you can't really see his teeth. And Robert Eggers very committed to accuracy has been like, this is what a count would look like of this era at this time. And it's like, I don't care. I want to see freaky vampire too. Oh yeah.

I want him to look like a vampire because that's what he actually is. Right. Is a vampire. Yep. And I can appreciate wanting to separate yourself a little bit from the original Nosferatu design, but I'm also like, but I don't want you to

because it's Nosferatu, so like make him look like that little freaky demon creature. People always get mad whenever anything is different from like, remember when Sonic first, the first Sonic trailer came out and people fucking lost their minds so much that they went back and like redid all of Sonic. Yeah Oh, I didn't know that was very expensive. Yeah, it really made people care about Sonic that much

There have been three movies man people care a TV show people fucking love Sonic I don't know something that is so not on my radar like deeply like Sonic the Hedgehog Yes, yeah the hedgehog. Yeah the hedgehog that we don't know when the last time I saw a picture like Sonic the Hedgehog. Yes. Yeah, the Hedgehog. Yeah, the Hedgehog. I don't even know when the last time I saw a picture of Sonic the Hedgehog. You're not going to AMC theaters because he greets you now every fucking movie. He greets you. Stop it.

Because Sonic 3, I believe, is in theaters now. Okay. I've heard they're good, to be honest. And I also really like, I've heard Idris Elba talking very seriously about how he prepared for his role as the bad hedgehog in Sonic. Wait, Idris Elba's in the Sonic the Hedgehog movies? Yeah, it's Idris Elba talking very seriously about how he prepared for his role as the bad hedgehog in Sonic. Wait, incredible. Idris Elba's in the Sonic the Hedgehog movies?

Yeah, it's Idris Elba, Jim Carrey. What is the world that we live in? It's a weird one. It's a weird one. Okay. But maybe they're good. Maybe. So they are looking at each other,

kind of not horny. It's an intense moment for sure, but it's not like lustful in the way that you're expecting, but he does look like hungry for her, I suppose. And she offers up her chest to be bitten and he disrobes, we see his body like pretty well in this light and he, yeah, just looks like a mummy, basically mummy body.

He looks like he's like rotting. Yeah. But he's too dry. Yeah. Interesting, okay, yeah. Yeah. Got it, crumbling, kind of crumbling. Not, no, actually that would be,

that would be interesting. Not chalky, just hard. He looks like plastic. Yeah. Oh, okay. He should be both dry and wet. Like I feel like there should be crumbling bits of him revealing wetness underneath.

Yeah, he should be, in my perfect world, he's both hot and like not solid. He's like too solid of a form. Yeah, there should be parts of him like breaking off. Decaying, it should be actively decaying. Yeah. Anyway. But he does get naked.

He gets naked, he gets on top of her, he's biting her chest and maybe also fucking her. It's not, we don't like- Does seem like perhaps it's both. Yeah, there's definitely like thrusting, but from both ends, because he's also biting, like thrusting. This is so gross.

It's really upsetting. It really is. Yuck. And, you know, Thomas is rushing back, rushing back, rushing back. And the sun is almost starting to come up. We see it's the hint of dawn. That was part of the lore is basically like,

if she can just fuck him until the sun comes up. We're all good, we're all good. And he's in kind of a days of it all, like milk drunk type of thing. Yeah. He's like kind of out of it. And so he like starts to kind of notice the sun coming up, but then Ellen kind of redirects,

like grabs his head again and redirects it to face her. And it's like, Moore like offers up Moore and it looks like she's really being drained of all of her blood. And so this is like Moore is probably gonna kill her. offers up more and it looks like she's really being drained of all of her blood. And so this is like more is probably going to kill her. And she just says like, keep drinking, keep drinking. And he does.

And then the sun rises above the hills and shines into the bedroom. And now he notices it and gets a face full of sunlight. And she's holding him and he starts bleeding from his eyes and mouth, and his mouth opens really wide, and he's just like, ah, as he's melting internally almost. And then collapses on top of her. He is dead. He doesn't turn into ash or dust or anything.

There's a corpse there, and she is also dying. You see the light kind of leaving her eyes, but Thomas arrives just in time to see her final breath. Do they say anything to each other? Thomas arrives just in time to see her final breath. Do they say anything to each other? I think he just calls out to her, but she's kind of too far gone. But she looks at him with a loving look, like saying, I love, she's smizing.

She's smizing. Smizing. That face can do a lot, that face can say a lot. And then she dies. He drops at the bedside next to her, he's sobbing, he's devastated. Von Franz is maybe there as well, everyone's looking very sad, but also knowing that this sacrifice is, you know, going to save the rest of the village and prevent further deaths from happening. Very brave, very noble. Thank you so much, Ellen.

But God, we're gonna miss you, especially Thomas. It's just. It sucks. I really want that to be the voice of her. We're gonna miss you so much. Thank you, Ellen. Your contribution will not be forgotten. So brave.

So brave. Dang, no, dang, we're really gonna miss you. Your contribution will not be forgotten. So brave. Dang, no, dang, we're really gonna miss you. Your husband's really gonna miss you. Darn, darn, darn. He's gonna miss you the most. Most of all. It's just a retrospective of Ellen throughout the movie, just like black and white photos of her.

Ellen, remember when you did that? Oh. Oh. Like at the Academy of the Awards when we see Trudy die the past year. It's just cross fading between photos. Is that how it ends? No, he's sobbing next to her

and then we get an overhead shot of both of their dead bodies, Orlok on top of Ellen. And you see his, his corpse seems like it has kind of shrank. Like that's been part of- It's like shriveled. Like shriveled up.

Wait, so when Thomas comes in, Orlok's still on top of her? Oh yeah. Yeah, yeah, oh yeah. Oh, damn, that sucks. Yeah. But he like understands. I feel like I never felt like he was like jealous of Orlok.

No, no, it was never a matter. No, he was never mad at him. He understands. It'd be really funny if he came in and he's like, "'Babe, did you cheat on me? "'What the fuck?' "'Wait, what the fuck? What the fuck is going on in here?

No, but you just see this horrifying overhead shot of their dead bodies. Absolutely surrounded by blood. Yes, so much blood. Like there's blood all over the bed. And it's beautiful. It really is a beautiful shot. Yeah, it is.

And that's the end of the movie. Damn. Damn. Not the end of the movie. Damn. Damn. Oh, not a feel good movie. Fucking sucks, Ellen, we miss you. Ellen, we love what you did, girl, thank you for that. Ellen. You saved us off from the plate, that was so cool.

It was really cool. We're really gonna miss you. So cool. Girl, you're the coolest. So cool what you did. You're like a role model for all of us. We're gonna miss you. So cool. Girl, you're the coolest. So cool what you did. You're like a role model for all of us. We're gonna miss you. We're gonna miss you, Ellen.

Pour one out for Ellen tonight, guys. Cheers to Ellen. Cheers to Ellen. Ellen's a real one. But yeah, that's Nosferatu. Okay, here it is. 2024 Nosferatu. I got to say I was a little underwhelmed by it,

but I had a really good time still, and I've had a really good time retelling it. Yeah, expectations were high. I think we really- My expectations were absolutely through the roof. It was really hard not to go in. I wanted it to be everything. I wanted it to to go in. I wanted it to be everything. I wanted it to be really scary.

I wanted it to be, it was the thing that always happens to me when I go to see a scary movie, when it's then not too scary and I'm like, aw, but I already, I was gonna be here no matter what. And it wasn't even scary. It really wasn't that scary. It was beautiful, but it wasn't as scary and it wasn't as horny as I wanted it to be.

Yeah, it could have been hornier. I wanted it to get a little more unhinged, a little more feral than it did. Yeah, it wasn't as horny and evil as I feel we were led to believe. Yeah, yep. More horny, more evil, please. Okay.

But man, Lily Rose Depp. Yeah, she's a star. She's got it, she's a star. I do wanna see, I wanna watch the idol. I wanna watch like the first like five minutes of the idol. You should, because it starts like on a very long, one continuous take of her face as she's just doing all different facial expressions for like a photo shoot and it's really, really cool.

Interesting, okay. They're like, now be really sad, now be really angry. And so it's just like close up on her face as she's like doing all these facial expressions. It's a very fun beginning too. I'm excited to see what else she does. Yeah, I wonder what her career is gonna be like. I can't wait to see. Cause I feel like she hasn't been in that many things,

right, has she? She hasn't been on my radar long. She's like a model, she's young too. Yeah, exactly. The only other thing besides the idol I can think of, or two other things, she was in a movie I think called Silent Night or some Christmassy horror movie with Keira Knightley

and Matthew Good that I really liked. Ooh. It's not quite a horror movie. She was in The King. And The King is the other one. That Netflix movie that no one saw with Timmy Chalamet. Oh, is's not quite a horror movie. She was in The King, that Netflix movie that no one saw with Timmy Chalamet. Oh, is that how she and Timmy met? Yeah, I think so, I would imagine.

But yeah, she was great. Okay, that's exciting. I'm excited to watch her career, and I'm excited for whatever Robert Eggers does next. Yeah, yeah, I'm definitely, I'll stay tuned. I want him to go as wild as he did with the lighthouse. Yeah, that's the thing is I just, I feel like I love- We know he can get freaky.

The levels of insanity that the lighthouse went to, I feel like- Yeah, there's not enough masturbating in this one. Was there any masturbating in this one? No. Could have been more furious masturbating. Coulda, shoulda, woulda. I got confused because I just watched Baby Girl

and there's definitely masturbating in Baby Girl. So for a second I couldn't answer the question, but no, it's not in Nosferatu. You're getting confused between Nosferatu and Baby Girl. Like Nicole Kidman masturbating, was that Nosferatu? Okay, well, I personally loved it. I was not underwhelmed at all. I was overwhelmed with emotion,

especially about Ellen at the end. And it's worth seeing for sure. I mean, it's really a good, like a good theater experience. Yes. Yeah, we didn't do some of those visuals justice. There were moments as we were going, I was like, oh yeah, there was this thing that happened that looked really cool, but I don't know when

and I don't know how to describe it. So just know that there's other stuff in there that was cool. I believe it. Oh, you guys, I love you so much. I have to go. I love you so much. I have to go right now.

We'll be back next week, listeners. We love you very much. And from all of us here, I'm too scared I Didn't Watch, goodbye. We did it. We made it. Thank you all for listening to another episode of To Scary Didn't Watch. If you enjoy the show, please remember to subscribe and rate us on Spotify and Apple podcasts. Five stars only or we will haunt you. And if you simply can't get enough of us, we have good news for you.

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That was a HeadGum Podcast. Hi, I'm Caleb Herron, host of the So True Podcast now on HeadGum. Every week, me and my guests get into it and we get down to what's really going on. I ask them what's so true to them, how they got to where they are in life, a bunch of other questions, and we also may or may not test their general trivia knowledge.

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