Too Scary; Didn't Watch - SIGNS

Episode Date: October 15, 2025

Movie & Guest Intro @ 17:35Trivia @ 20:25Recap starts @ 28:40TrailerFollow the show: @TSDWpodcast on Twitter, TikTok, and Instagram.Check out our Patreon for bonus episodes and additional content!Rate Too Scary; Didn’t Watch 5 Stars on Spotify and Apple Podcasts and leave a review for Emily, Henley, and Sammy.Advertise on Too Scary; Didn't Watch via Gumball.fm.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a headgum podcast. This is Emily, Henley, and Sammy, and you're listening to Too Scary Didn't Watch. Hi, everyone. Welcome to Too Scary Didn't Watch, the horror movie recap podcast for those too scared to watch for themselves. Emily and I am too scared to watch scary movies. I'm Hemley and I'm also too scared to watch scary movies. I'm Sammy and I love watching scary movies. And so I watch them so that you don't have to sometimes and sometimes I don't want. Sometimes somebody else does.

And you'll just have to stay tuned and find out what this week is going to be like. Wow. Because first. Wait. I'm just reading the recap. Sorry, I didn't know that. Oh, my God. I'm so excited.

I'm so excited. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Are you spoil? Wow, wow, wow. But before we get into this week's movie, we have a little bit of haunted housekeeping. First, just to say that our H-Chella shirts are still available, and you can find those at bonfire.com slash two-held-2-C-E-L-C-L-A. And then one more little bit.

piece of on and housekeeping, which is that we are having a virtual live Halloween spooktacular yet again, we will be coming to you live on our Patreon on October 26th at 4.30 Pacific Time, 7.30 Eastern. And that'll just be available on our Patreon to the $10 month tier. We'll just post it there, and we are going to be covering, drum roll, please. Antichrist. We have invited horror spousant Joel Jensen to join us, and I told him first that we wanted him to join us before I told him what the way was. And he was, like, so excited and was like, oh, my God, you guys want me to do the hell

me to meet with us so nice, yes, definitely. I said, great, we're covering Andrew Christ. He went, oh, I don't know. And I was like, you were so excited two seconds ago. He's going to do it, but he doesn't want to. Has Joel seen Antichrist? No. No, and he's really not.

He doesn't want to. Oh, I'm excited. I love it. And I feel like Joel might like it. There are some things that nobody could possibly like, but sure. That's not the point. It's not meant for liking. Listen, here's what, okay, here's what I'm showing up for.

I'm showing up for the costume reveal. We are also dressing up, yes. That's why I, that's why I tune in, you know, I, I like to be there just to watch your faces shine as Tom Cruise or the Titanic or whoever you choose to be this year. And I'll tune out any of this, like, Antichrist nonsense. Any of it. Any and all of it. It would be like it didn't happen. I have been putting it off for multiple years, and I'm ready now.

It's just simply time. I'm ready. I'm ready. Yeah. I can't wait. Of course not. I'll be excited enough for all of us. I'm excited too.

Let's not joke around. I'm so excited. It's going to be great. So join us, won't you? Won't you? To get freaking pumped for Halloween. I'm already feeling. In the spooky season, I mean, I guess we're like halfway through.

But I hung up some Halloween lights and I'm just absolutely giddy. So, yeah. Oh, best time of year. Okay, that's all the haunted housekeeping. So will you guys tell me, did anything scary happen to you this week? Nothing major over here. I'll just say that I'm packing for a trip that I'm going on this week, going to Montreal. Don't give me advice for the trip

because I'll already be back by the tennis episode goes out. But it's going to be cold and it hasn't yet been cold here. And in going to pack, I had that thing that happens every season change where I was like, I

don't have any clothes I like. I don't know how to wear pants. Like, none of this makes sense. Can't possibly figure this out. What am I going to do? Just like as if I've never, ever worn pants in a sweater in my life. It didn't make sense. I couldn't make it make sense. And it broke me. Yeah. Yeah. We just had our first few quote unquote cold colder days in Los Angeles

where it got down to the 60s. And I had a similar feeling of just being so confused about how to dress. I'm so confused. I'm so confused. It's tough out there. Yeah. I don't. Yeah. I live on the East Coast where it's cold often and I feel the same way. I have 100 sweaters, 100 pairs of pants. I hate all of them. None of them look good together. None of them look good on me. None of them make sense outside. None of them keep me warm enough. No. They're too bulky, but they're not warm enough, but they're, um, I can't, what, like, what, what is a sweater? Like, how does one? How does one wear a sweater without looking like you're straight out of like an American Girl catalog or like 2008 graduation high school graduation. I see them on other people and

I'm like, well, that looks nice. But I don't, I don't know how to do it. I couldn't recreate it. I could get a gun to my head. I could not recreate it. It's really, it defies logic. I think it's this you get so into the habit and routine of dressing for warm weather. And that so it's just like, well, I don't know how that's, that's where my head is at. and I can't... I'm also like... I can't switch gears. I can see the number

in the temperature when I look up the weather. But I'm like... But what is that? What does it mean? Also, it can mean something completely different depending on like the wind

and the humidity. Oh, don't even get me started on wind. You know? Yeah. And like, I'm walking around. So is that going to mean like actually, oh, it's like so cold because you're outside a lot

or is it like when you're going to get warmed up? Right. Because you're moving around. And you also have to pack. So many variables. So many unnoticed. You only, it can only bring like one jacket, but what does that mean when like one day it's, you know, I just, I, I, I, I, I don't know, I don't know, man. God, good luck to you. Yes, seriously. I'm really awful. Honestly, it's really tough. It's really, really hard. It's really tough.

Oh. Yeah. Um, okay. Speaking of things that are tough. Yeah. I, um, got strep throat this week. Oh, my God, you did. Yes, you did. And I was so. sick. I was the sickest I've been since I was pregnant with May. I last Sunday felt like my throat hurt and was like, oh, I guess I'm going to need a cold, whatever. By Monday, I was like in bed, so sick. Took a COVID test. Didn't have COVID. Tuesday, so sick. Like knives in my throat. Like horrible, horrible, horrible. But I don't know, I don't know what was going on in my brain, you guys. I was like, it's a cold. I like didn't even consider that I had strep throat. I think maybe one of you guys, I think, Emily, you said strep throat. And I was like, yeah. Because when it was like, it's definitely COVID. And then when it wasn't COVID, I was like,

well, it must just be it. Because I all, every time I'm sick, I get a sore throat, not that bad, but it's always like, that's like my number one symptom. And I always think it's strep throat because I'm like, if it's just strep throat, I could get antibiotics and then it'll be better. And it like literally never is. Like it is, I never have strep throat. But I always kind of wish that I do because then you can get antibiotics. Right. So I didn't even, it didn't even cross my mind. Didn't even cross my mind. I was like, no, it's a cold, I guess, but the worst cold I've ever had in my entire life. Like, I felt like I was dying. I was a bad sore throat. Oh, horrible. Every time I swallowed, I had to like brace myself. My muscles like all my muscle clenched. You like break out in a sweat because your body's like,

ow, out, out, out, out, out. Yes, yes. Terrible. So finally, Wednesday morning, I'm still so sick. We wake up. It's like 6 a.m. or whatever. And I just like tell Tim, I'm like, I think I need to see the doctor. And then I go back to sleep. Tim gets up with the kids. And the next time I see Tim, he's like, okay, I'm taking off work and I'm going to bring you to urgent care. And that's how sick I was. He could tell that I couldn't even go to the doctor by myself because like I was that sick. And so I was so grateful because I didn't even, I was so disoriented. I was like, what? I don't even know what's going on. That's what happened to me when I had COVID in it's because I had such a high fever that when you're that sick, you're just like, well, I just want to sleep. And it's

like really scary because it's like, am I going to just like die? Am I going to die in his bed? Because I'm like unable to move. Because I was like, okay. So luckily Tim did everything. He like scheduled the doctor's appointment. He like got the Uber. We like went together. I went to the doctors. And then the thing I haven't told you guys is that the surprise of the sense. was who this doctor was. So I'm sick as a dog, like shivering in this doctor's office. And this man walks in, this older white man. George Clooney. And he looks at me and he goes, I wish, no. He goes, No, Wiley. He was like, Henley, what do you do for a living? Tell me about yourself. And I was like, Oh, I have a podcast. I was like, what? And he goes, and he goes, are you famous? Tell me. Tell me honestly, you famous. You look like you're famous. And I was like, what? No, I'm not famous at all. Like literally. You think you're like hallucinating? I'm like, no. And he goes, okay, open up your mouth. Open up you. And he like shines a flashlight into my mouth. And he goes, he shines it for a second. And he goes, oh, looks away. Shocked. Oh my God. Oh my God. He shines it again. He goes, you're three. You're three.

throat, it is redder than that trash can over there. That trash can. See that trash can? Your throat redder than that trash can. And he goes, why did you wait so long to come in, Henley? You waited so long. Men wait that long. Women don't wait that long. Women don't wait that long. Women don't wait that long. Women don't wait that long. What are you talking about? He said so many like non-sequiters in a space of like maybe four minutes that we spent together that my mind was ricocheting across the room. I was like, I was like, sir, please. I just need help. I'm not concerned with the gender split of when we go to the doctor. Please just give me medicine. He was like, you got strep throat. I barely need to test you. I'm going to give you antibiotics. Here. And then he like did the test, whatever. And he goes, I had strep throat once so long ago. I was a little kid. I saw my, I saw my mom. I kissed on the top of the head. That's it. You

kiss on the top of the head. You see your children. You kiss them on the top of the head. You see your husband. You kiss them on the top of the head. And that's it. And then you get out of the room. That's it. That's fine. That's all you need to do. Okay, Henley. Are you sure? Are you sure? Oh my God. I'm sure you're not famous. And I was like, I can't handle this. You're just like, please, sir. I couldn't handle this if I was like 100%. True. At peak health, my most rested self ever. I think I would still be like, I don't know what to do with this. You have to stop. You have to stop talking to me. So obviously, I walk out of this doctor's appointment office.

The first thing I look at Tim and I'm like, you will not believe what the interaction I just had. That was, and I tried to tell him everything. So then Tim goes and tells, immediately goes and tells everyone at his office about this doctor because he'd taken off work. So everyone like knew that I was that sick. So now over the past like three days, I've had various people from the church coming up to me being like, are you famous? or being like, I heard about you, a doctor. Or like, like, like, referencing the doctor. It's funny.

And it just created this like whole, I don't know. New lore. A lore. A lore. Going to get back to him and he's going to have his feelings hurt. I hope not. No, maybe he's going to make him feel famous. Are you famous?

And important. That's true. You show you're not famous. I was like, not today I'm not doctor. Not today. just a girl with a red throat looking at a doctor begging for medicine it's also really funny to hear that like someone who has a podcast would be famous it's like sir I hate to tell you but there are the only people who are famous with podcasts were famous before the podcast exactly they're

just famous people who have podcasts that's the only thing yeah so that was my weekend I got antibiotics and thank God for antibiotics because within 24 hours I was like completely fine, back to normal. Oh, yeah. Great. That's why I always want my sore throats to be strep. But, I mean, better to not have it at all, you know? Better to not have it at all.

Sure. But medicine is so cool and I love it. I'm so glad that you're feeling better, Henley. Me too. What a roller coaster. I'm glad you went to a doctor, man. Like, it's hard to go to a doctor in this country. I know.

She got to go. And a lot of people do have COVID and the flu right now. So just a reminder, she'd go get. your shots if you can yeah um because you know it's out there yeah i my this in a roundabout way gets to my scary thing um which is that i had a housewarming party last night quite a few people canceled last minute because that they were sick and i said stuff's really going around stuff's really going around going around um the party was wonderful but and the party was wonderful but and This scary thing is almost scarier for Emily, which is that today, while we were cleaning up in the, like, further part of the backyard where you guys were standing by the fire pit, there is a big old dead rat.

Wait, did you see a rat? No. Oh, no. Hopefully it wasn't there at the time. Hopefully it wasn't. Hopefully it died post. Where in relation to... I think it's a little further.

It's a little further in. It's like where the trees get a little lower hanging. So I don't think anyone would have walked over there, but you were close to it if it was there. And it's also just I love rats. And I don't love dead rat. But circle of life. Circle of life. But yeah, and we found it this morning.

I actually didn't see it. Duncan just saw it and told me not to come over there. And I said, okay, you don't have to tell me. Don't have to tell me twice. But I'm not sure if he's dealt with it yet. And both of us were kind of just like, so what do we do? With it? You put in the compost.

I don't think you do. I don't think so. What do you do with it? Do we call someone? Do we just throw it in the trash? I kind of feel like you just throw it in the trash. Maybe put it, maybe bag it. Maybe double bag it.

Oh, you definitely got a double bagget. Yeah. Maybe you double bag it. Again, don't give us advice because by the time you all hear this, it's, we're way past it. The rat is long gone. But I guess for next time, let us know what to do. Because I sure as heck don't know. Yeah.

Burry it? Not pleasant. Is it very smelly? I haven't smelled it. Oh. But I'm, you know, maybe it just. Don't give it time. Don't give it time, yeah.

I imagine would smell worse. It's a fresh dead rat. So it probably wasn't dead yet. It probably wasn't there. It probably wasn't dead, yeah. It probably wasn't. Well. Great party, though.

But a fun party for all but one little rodent. And okay, so now we have arrived at the portion of the show where we will find out that I did. not watch this week's movie. Nope. Because Emily was brave this week, it is spooky season after all. And this movie is, I feel like, unbelievable that we have not covered it yet. This is a big one. This is a big one.

Okay, wait, hold on. Hold on. Unless she doesn't come back. This week, we are covering. Is that a tin foil hat? Signs. and this is a tinfoil hat so the aliens can't read my thoughts um you guys i'm so excited to talk about the movie signs i'm so excited i am so excited you guys i saw this movie when it came out and i

haven't seen it i had never seen it it was always one that i was like it's gonna be too scary it's gonna be too scary i can like remember when the trailer would come on tv when i was a kid being like oh my god oh my god that looks so scary um and i i it calls it was calling to me i was Like, I really, I, I really wanted to watch it. I felt like it was time. And you guys, I love the movie signs. Oh, I'm going to rewatch it. I'm so excited.

Oh, my God. Okay, you guys. Let's talk about it. Let's talk about it. Signs. Came out in 2002. Wow. And directed by M. Night Shyamalan, starring Mel Gibson, walking Phoenix, Abigail Breslin,

Rory Culkin, and Cherry Jones. Wow. Wait, can I just say, sorry to interrupt you? No, please. Just real quick. quick. I have this thing in my brain. It's feeling like a like crazy thing in my brain where I can't stop thinking that Timothy Shalame is in signs only because Timothy Shalame is an interstellar, which is so similar to signs in the sense that they're both in like a farmhouse and like creepy

things are happening with space. And every time we're talking about who's in signs, I want Timothy Shalomay to be in it so badly. That'd be really cool. Which makes no sense because he would have been like 10 years old. But he could have been in it. Rory Colcombe was in it and Rory Colcombe was a kid. He would not have been 10. though. No, he would have been like Abigail Breslin's age, probably, right? How old is Abigail Breslin now? Let's look it up. It was Abigail Breslin's first movie. Oh, wow. I just think that Timothy Shalamee should do a remake of signs. That's all I'm saying. Timothy Shalamee would have been seven. He was born in 95, so 2002. Abigail Breslin was born in 96. There you go. So there you go.

It could have been. Could have been. It could have been. It could have been him. Recast Abigail with Timothy. I'm going to be thinking about Timothy the whole time. Yeah. You could have it be whoever you want it to be in your head. I'm going to be imagining Timothy. Okay. So you both have seen the movie Science, but not since it came out. It's been a long time. I've probably seen it since it came out, but not in the last

15 years, at least. I think I've only seen it once. Great. Great. I don't remember anything about it except the general vibe. Okay, great. I'll just say, before we get into, I've got trivia and all that. Before we get into it, Mel Gibson's a piece of shit. Oh yeah. Like, we all, like, we know. We know. He's a bad man. Um, so just know that we know.

And this was a movie made in 2002. And we're just going to live in that, in that moment. Mm-hmm. For this we have. Mm-hmm. Great. Okay. Signs. Has a 76% on Rotten Tomatoes. A 59 on Metacritic and a 6.8 on IMDB. Kind of all over the place. Yeah. budget was 72 million box office 408.2 million second highest grossing of M-night's movies after six cents wow makes sense the tagline of this movie is the worst tagline I've ever heard the tagline is it's not like they didn't warn us what we've been warned about so many things also like The phrasing of it, it's not like they didn't warn us.

So we deserve it. And also like... Who's they? The aliens or like the government or like who? I think it's the aliens. I think it's referring to them like the signs. They left signs. But we didn't know what they were.

And we didn't know what to do. Where were we to go? It just is really a strange, really strange tagline. That is quite bad. It's quite bad. Okay. Joaquin Phoenix replaced Mark Ruffalo. Interesting.

Who had to pull out of the film Dudeway Brain Tumor which was later found to be benign. Still? Scary? Still? Really scary. Graham Hess, which is the character played by Mel Gibson,

was originally written as an older character. Paul Newman was offered the role, but turned it down, as did Clint Eastwood. Wow. The production used a new watering technique to make the corn grow faster, which the Delaware Valley, agricultural college, which is where they

filmed, was very keen to adopt for themselves. Wow. A lot of corn in this movie. A lot of corn in this movie. The crop circles are real. In what way? Done by aliens. They actually like bent the

corn and made them. But they did that. Yeah. They didn't go to. But they did that. The aliens did it. They didn't go to it. No, the aliens didn't do it. But like it's not CG. It's got it. corn bent in such a way? C-B-I-S-A-W. C-B-I-A-W.

C-B-I-A-W. Corn-Bent in such a way. That's what they said on set. Did you get the C-B-I-S-A-W? Ready? Copy that. Where are we on the C-B-I-S-A-W? Where are we?

I need it stat. M-N-N-S-A-W. really it's so stupid but it's going to make me laugh for a long time um am night shaman set the film in cornfields because the stocks are taller and more ominous than wheat which is true we've often said yeah corn corn is the scariest crop it's the scariest crop mm-hmm we've always been saying that yeah um emnight shaman said this was the easiest of all his movies to write

and direct wow flex okay um the birthday party scene has been named one of the scariest scenes of all time by this trivia just says by movie critics

I don't know who and I don't know where but I agree with them yes that's seared into my memory oh I have no memory of the birthday party scene

oh well you're gonna just have to wait because I did find the clip M Night Tomlin thinks the scariest thing in this film is that a good man

could lose his connection with God. Oh, my God. Oh, I got shivers. Wow. Wow. Was he talking about Mel Gibson specifically? Mel Gibson, the human actor. Mel Gibson, the bad man, who just, again, I know we said it at the beginning, but just to remind

everyone, Mel Gibson is one of Trump's special ambassadors to Hollywood, just in case we forgot about that, along with Sylvester Stallone and John Voigt. Yikes. Yes, I remember John Voigt. Sylvester Stallone, I actually didn't know that one either. Yeah, interesting. stuff it all tracks it all tracks um okay i actually think it's a good trailer that we can and should watch now okay oh this'll bring back memories probably yeah it just takes you right back

to it um okay oh boy oh boy oh boy oh boy oh boy What can make geometric shapes of a football field? What kind of machine can bend to stock a corn over without breaking it? It can't be by hand. It's too perfect. So the aliens can't read our minds? Oh Some animals around the county have been acting funny Some of them violent

It's almost like they act when they smell a predator around Amman, Nairobi Bengal and Jerusalem As the latest Sam shows on every station It is the 18th reported Cropside in that country in the last 72 hours

I'm a little scared All this stuff on TV Joe Gills was in here You're talking about the end of the world. They're staying in the shadows. It's called probing to make sure things are all clear. Clear for what? For the rest of them.

There's a monster outside my room can have a glass of water. Ground forces aren't being assembled. It's happening. Don't be afraid. It's like war of the worlds. I believe it's going to pass. Don't be afraid. They're in the house.

Here are cops. Don't be afraid. I got spooked. Wow. It's really spooky. The dog barks got me every time. Yeah. I can't believe this movie didn't scare me more when I saw.

I feel like I saw it pretty recently after. I don't know. I know I've seen it. I don't know when. But honestly, was that Merritt Weaver? Yes. A baby Merit Weaver. She is like so amazing. And the thing that's so funny about watching this is it's like, okay, this is from so long ago, 23 years ago. And all of these actors, I mean, Mel Gibson is on to other things. But like they're still obviously like very active and doing things. It's kind of amazing to know that you've watched them. age over this period of time like yeah yeah walking phoenix looks so young in this yeah polo shirt feels so he looks like such a little baby yeah really crazy it's wild and yeah merit weaver like is a baby in this movie it's crazy she's great and when i saw this movie i was like that's a full grown like big adult a big adult a really big one a really huge one yeah it's really it's really wild

stuff wow i'm so excited i don't remember what happens in this movie I mean, I kind of remember something, but I don't remember most of it. I'm really excited to find out. I'm excited to tell you. Should we get into it? Let's do it. Let's do it. Ever feel like your money just disappears every month?

I know I sure do. And one reason for that is all the subscriptions that I sign up for and then immediately forget about. But, you know, who has the time to go through and find all those sneaky recurring charges? thankfully you don't have to thanks to rocket money rocket money is a personal finance app that helps find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions monitors your spending and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings rocket money shows you all your expenses in one place and if you see a subscription that you forgot about they'll even help you cancel it you can also get alerts when

your bills go up or if there's unusual activity in your accounts if you're close to going over budget and even when you're doing a good job. We all need a little positive reinforcement here and there. Rocket Money has saved users over $2.5 billion, including over 880 million in canceled subscriptions alone. Their 10 million members save up to $740 a year when they use all of the app's premium features. That's a lot of money. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to RocketMoney.com slash Too Scary today. That's RocketMoney.com slash too scary. RocketMoney.com slash too scary. Mr. Monopoly here. Monopoly is back at McDonald's. Register in the McDonald's app so you're

ready to get your bag. Two ways to peel for a chance to get your bag. Physical peels with select items and digital peels with others to Get your bag! Play Monopoly at McDonald's. No purchase necessary. C rules at Play.mcd.com for full details and AMOE.com to play without purchase. Ends November 23rd, but bonus play at November 2nd.

Monopoly is a registered trademark of Hasbro. Copyright McDonald's. Okay, first I just need to let you know the opening credits are really dramatic. Yeah. Really dramatic opening credits. I feel like that was like an early 2000s. It's like big strings going like do, do do do doon, don't do.

Yeah. And it's like it's just like a, a circle, an illuminated circle in the middle of a dark screen and someone's name comes up and then it goes away and it's like, the next name. And it's like, this name! And it's just like, oh my God, like it's like really, it's like

really intense and it goes on for a really long time. Then all of a sudden we see we're at a playground just adjacent to a cornfield. We're looking at this little swing set. We pull back. We realize we're looking through a second story window on

the nightstand we see a family photo two kids father wife father wife two kids the dad is Mel Gibson and he is wearing a priest outfit

watch the fuck up is this movie about me I hope not cut to Reverend's face Smell Gibson wakes up with a start gets up he's moving through his house is quiet he's kind of tipped on around brushing his teeth picking up a toy off the ground

when we hear children screaming from outside of the house he looks out he runs outside we see uh there's like a like a guest house right next to it same property walking phoenix his younger brother he runs out they both run to each other like where's screaming coming from where are the kids it's coming from the cornfield they're running through the cornfield trying to get to these kids they find Beau first. This is Abigail Breslin, little girl. They're like, where's Morgan?

Where's Morgan? We hear Morgan call Dad run through the cornfield to find him. We see Morgan first. The dad is like, Morgan, are you okay? What's going on?

And he says, the dogs were barking. They woke us up. I think God did it. And he says, did what Morgan? And Morgan grabs his dad's head and turns it so that they're both looking at the same thing.

He looks shocked, stands up. We're still on his face. He steps out and we pan up and he's in the middle of corn bent in such a way. CBISW. Big circle. Big circle of corn. Open clearing the middle of this cornfield. You've seen it.

You know what it looks like. Dogs are running around it, bark and bark and bark and bark. And they're all agitated, all upset. The whole family's out looking at it. It's pretty weird. We pan up. We see it from above. and we see that it's the shape from signs, you know?

It's like circles and then like a pointy thing at the end with like a little semi-circle. It's like this long thing. Fade to black, we have a Chiron come up that says, Bucks County, Pennsylvania, 40 miles outside of Philadelphia. See Mel Gibson on the phone. He says, Lee, you know, the kids are really freaked out. And I know it would make us all feel better if they knew that it was just Lionel and the Wolfington Brothers. he listens for something on the other end

and goes, huh, at the movies. All right, well, thanks, Lee. Hangs up. Goes into the kitchen. His kids are sitting with one of the dogs, Houdini is laying on the kitchen mat. And they're like, I think Houdini's sick. He just peed.

I think something's wrong with him. And they're like, go take him outside. Dad says, I'll call Dr. Crawford. Morgan says, he doesn't treat animals. And dad's like, he'll know what to do. do go to take Kudini outside and just then as the kids

are walking out we see Caroline arrive she is a cop top cop I don't know she's town town town town police officer this is Cherry Jones and

he's like oh wow it took you long enough I called you two hours ago and she says well you know it's taking me a while old Mrs. Kindleman said that she got run down by some skateboarders and so you'll never believe it She went into the bike shop and she started spitting on all the skateboards.

It's this long story about an old lady spitting on skateboards that I don't know why we need it. But it really goes on for a while and it's just like, okay. We cut to Morgan outside. Morgan's probably eight, maybe 10. Sure. Maybe the kids are like 10 and 6.

He's grilling some chicken. He's got his little pitchfork turning over chicken wings. I don't know when he started that fire or like how this happened, but he's 10 and a little. some chicken wings um bow is sitting in front of houdini and she's got a cup of water she's not drinking it morgan says well why aren't you drinking her water and she says it's contaminated and he says we'll put it in houdini's bowl then houdini will drink it she pours it in houdini's bowl

pushes the bull towards houdini and we're all this is all shot from like behind houdini's heads it's like looking up at the kids from almost the dog's perspective and houdini is like growling and his hairs are up and he's like being really weird and it's clearly like directed at Bo and he's like starts growling more and we're not feeling good about it. Yeah. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. Houdini like gets up and like snaps at Bo. Bo gets up as if she's going to run away. And Morgan says a good thing where he says, no, Bo don't run. You don't want to act like prey. We know this. Wow. We cut away and we see meanwhile that Bill Gibson has taken. Caroline out into the corn field, the crop circle, and showing it to her. And they're like,

who could have done this? It's so perfect. Like, a machin couldn't have done it. The corn's not broken. It's only bent in such a way. And she's like, it certainly doesn't seem like Lionel and the Wolfington Brothers could have pulled this off. And they're like... The Wilfington brothers are like, really about town. And it really was a big problem with the Wilfington Brothers. And she says, you know, I was just at Theo's farm yesterday because some animals have been acting funny and violent, almost acting like animals do when they

sense a predator, you know, peeing on themselves, acting all aggressive. Meanwhile, as she's talking to him, she keeps calling him father, and he is in civilian clothes. Okay. She keeps calling him father. Eventually, he's like,

please stop calling me father. Then he stands up, and she's like, what is it? And he's like, I can't hear my kids. So they run back out through the cornfield Back out to the playground And we see Morgan crying Sitting in front of Houdini's body With that grilling pitch

What do you call that? It's not a pitchfork But it's like a little mini one Oh the top like a like a Like a tongue Yeah, but stabby But a two pronged fork Kind of

Yeah, it's a fork It's a two pronged fork It's a two prong grilling fork It's a two pong grilling fork. It's a two pong grilling fork Of course. So Houdini has been stabbed with his two-prong

grilling fork in the neck. And Morgan says he fell on me. He was trying to kill Bo. And he takes a little... As Morgan says, he takes a little puff of his inhaler. Like, he's so stressed. He takes a little puff of his inhaler.

And so the dad grabs the kids, takes him inside. Caroline leaves. And as he's walking into the house, he tells his brother, Joaquin Phoenix, whose name is Merrill. Merrill and Graham are their names.

He tells Merrill, like, tie Isbel up, she's the other dog. Tie her up and make sure the tie is really tight. That night, Graham wakes up with the start to see Bo at his bedside. She says, there's a monster outside my room. Can I have a cup of water? And he says, what's wrong with the water that you have in your room already? She said, it tastes old. So he gets her a cup of water, brings her back into her room.

He tucks her in. And she says, why do you talk to mom when you're by yourself? He says, it makes me feel better. She said, does she ever answer back? He says, no. She says, she never answers me either. And he's talking to her. And behind her is the window in her bedroom.

And he looks up, gets startled, stands up. We look on the roof of the guest house. a big dark figure standing on the roof. Alien? I don't know. Alien, get out of there. Big jump scare. So he goes, he goes and makes up his brother and he says, Lionel Pritchard and the Wolfington brothers are back. The Wolfington brothers, get out of here. So they get up to the front door and they're like, okay, Merrill's like, what is what we're going to do?

We're going to run outside and we're going to, we're going to yell and we're going to act crazy. We're going to scare him. And you're going to go one way and I'm going to go the other way. We're going to corral him to the front of the house. like it's a perfect plan and they're like okay I just like you gotta yell and curse and you know he's a former reverend he doesn't feel

comfortable with cursing but he's like okay fine I'll do what I have to do I know it's so tough to curse it's so tough to curse and but they do it and they run out and they're like we're going to get you we're going to get you love it your brothers blah and we see just every time

they turn a corner figures ahead of them they can't see who it is but they're getting away from them. Finally, they run back in each other front of the house. We're like, what the heck? Where's these guys? And then they hear sounds on the roof.

They look up and they're seeing some sort of dark figure on the roof. And we're just hearing like pitter-patter, little clickety footstepys running around. And Merrill's looking up and he's saying, I don't think that's the Wolfington brothers. And just then at an inhuman speed, this figure goes from being on the roof

to all of a sudden it's Russell's, through the corn. And we don't see who it was, but they're gone. Oh, my God. Wow. What are your guys' feelings of aliens in general? Not like if they exist or not, but do you find them, like, scary in horror movies? We haven't done, like, tons of alien movies. I almost was, like, not wanting to watch this movie because I, I was like, I don't think I'm going to find it scary because I don't. You're not particularly find. Necessarily scared of alien. Alien scary. That being said, like, this would be really scary. Yeah. But it's not, it's not a fear that I have. no. It's not really a fear I have either. I mean, but that being said, I also don't have

ghosts or demons as a fear because I'm blocking it out. So who knows if that's the same with aliens? I think it's like the same, it's like so unknown. It's so unknown. That's like why even bother being scared of it? Exactly. Why even bother being scared? Because like they could be the worst or they could be great. They could be great. Why aren't we focusing on the fact that aliens could be great? They could be. We don't talk about that enough, and we should. And I know it doesn't make for a good movie, but maybe... Well, it does, because that movie's E.T.

Yeah, I feel like there's quite a lot of movies where that... And the point is that we're bad. And so if a good alien comes here, we're not going to handle it right. Right, right, right. Of course, you're right. But those movies are more... Yeah, I don't know. All of that to say, I don't stay up at night being worried about aliens.

I do, like, worry about the, you know, the stuff that's... in space that's apparently going to hit Earth like that kind of worries me a little bit or hit the moon we got to nuke it yeah exactly like there's just a lot the thing is there's just so much to be scared of right exactly

that I do know of on this planet yeah that like you know that's taking priority right now yeah I too am not particularly scared of aliens so but I remember being pretty scared by this movie

it's it does turn a corner at some point no it does it just does this well like it's like you're scared it's like tense and again the things that happen like would be scary yeah I mean the scariest thing is like seeing that something is in your space and you don't know what it is that nobody knows what to do and it like runs out of your oh view if I was in this situation right now I would all be scared out of my fucking mind we'd be scared last night I was reading on the couch while Tim was upstairs and a book fell down off the something. And I was like, and I was like, time for me to go away. I can't be in this room anymore. And I had to run out of the room and not turn any of the lights off even or turn the fan off or anything. I was like,

it'll stay on all night and I'll be upstairs. See ya. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And that was the right, that was the right response. That was the right call. It was the right call. So the next morning, Caroline's over again, and Merrill and Graham are going to, you know, put in a report about what just happened. But Morgan first is talking to her, and he's really interested in her walkie-talkie because walkie-talkies are cool. And she's like, you know, if you have an old baby monitor, you could like use that. It'd only work one way, but you could like use that as a walkie-talkie. And he's like, well, I think Bo does have an old baby monitor cool. meanwhile we do say that beau is watching tv graham comes in the room to just make sure she's doing

all right and she's got like three glasses of water in front of her that she hasn't finished and he's like beau you're too old for this like you need to take a glass of water and finish the whole thing before you get another one what's wrong with this glass of water and she says it had dust in it it said what about this one it had hair what about this one uh margin took a sip and now has his amoebas in it and he's like oh my gosh and so he starts he goes to pick him all up to take him out of the room, turns and sees like eight more cups of water on top of the credenza. And it's just like, I can't deal with this right now. Goes back into the dining room to sit down with Caroline. And it's like, okay, telling her what happened. Caroline does commit, she says to

Merrill before Graham comes back into the room, she's like, by the way, I want to like commend you for moving in with your brother after what happened and helping him out. So we do know that they've suffered some sort of tragedy. So Graham comes in. They're trying to describe to Carolyn what happened, but she's like, okay, you know, who was this person? They're like, I don't really know, didn't get a good look at him.

There was a dark figure. She's like, okay, tall, short, male, female. They're like, and Merrill's like, who's definitely a man because he ran so fast. She's like, well, there are women that can run fast. And he's like, I've never seen a woman run that fast. And she says, you know, there are some Scandinavian Olympians like can run faster than you've ever seen.

And he's like, he jumped onto the roof. The roof's 10 feet tall. She's like, there are some Olympian female long jumpers too. And she says, is there anyone who maybe is holding a grudge against you? Father, maybe somebody, you know, a church member who's upset that you left. He says, no, I don't think so. Bo comes into the room and he's like, can you help me find the remote? He's like, Bo, why don't you just change the channel on the TV?

and she says, I tried that. The same thing is on every channel. It's like, the same show is on every channel. What the heck could that mean? They all go into the living room, look at the TV, and wouldn't you believe it, it's a breaking news story about these exact same crop circles that they have in their corn popping up all over the world.

They're all watching the news, wondering what does this mean? And this news anchor says this is an exact quote. There's only a few plausible explanations for what this could be. Either this is one of the most elaborate hoaxes ever created, or basically, it's for real. Basically? It's for real.

It's for real. And Morgan takes a big puff of his inhaler and he says, extraterrestrials. Oh my God, cute. He's so cute with that inhaler. On her way out, Caroline says to Graham, She says, you know, I think you should turn the news off. We don't know what's going on out there, but, you know, your kids, they've been through a lot.

I think the best thing for you to do is just take them out, get their minds off of it. Let them think about just some normal stuff. And he says, yep, that's a good idea. We're going to do that. So they go into town. It's a really small little town, cute little main street. He sends the kids to the bookstore, give them some bookstore money. He needs to go to the pharmacy and pick up Morgan.

medicine and Merrill goes walking off on his own and Graham says, okay, we'll meet back here in 15 minutes for pizza. He's like, okay. Morgan goes into the bookstore and asks the bookstore owners if they have a book on extraterrestrials. And the woman running the store says, you know, I think we do have one book in here that we got for the city folk. It's on the third shelf, second book from the left. It's like how on, this is a big bookstore. How on the The whole store memory? She's got it mapped out, but she knows exactly where that extraterrestrial book is. Give this lady a raise.

Meanwhile, we see Graham at the pharmacy. The pharmacist is Merritt Weaver. Or I think she's just like working the counter because she's a young. She's a teen. Yeah. And she says, father, she's clearly very emotional. Father, can I ask you a favorite? And he says, I'm not a Reverend anymore.

Father, it's just, I need to clear my conscience, you know. people are saying this might be the end of the world and I'm scared and he says I haven't been a father for six months I haven't been a reverend do you know that she starts crying and he's like okay fine yes I'll I will hear your confession me and obviously that Merrill

has gone to an army recruitment office he's reading some pamphlets talking to the guy behind the desk and this guy has just one of the wildest jaws and ways of speaking of ever seen but he's like

I know what this is. This is a military tactic. It's called probing. You send in a few people. They get a lay of the land. They don't mess with anybody. They don't do anything. They're just kind of feeling it out.

Making sure everything's all clear. Merrill says, clear for what? And he says, for the rest of them. And he says, wait, hey, wait a minute. I know you. Wait a minute. Are you Merrill Hess? Oh my gosh.

I was there that day. hit that record-breaking home run, that 507 footer over the left field. Oh, my gosh. Is that you? He says, yeah, I have the bat hanging on my wall. He says, oh, my God, you have a couple of records, don't you? And he's like, yeah, I have, I actually have five. He says, oh, my gosh, what are you doing? Why aren't you in the majors? You should be playing major league, baseball earning stacks of cash, having beautiful ladies lick your toes. Oh, lick your toes. And from by, Behind him we hear another guy that says Merrill's not in the prose

because he's got another record that nobody knows about. Merrill turns around and he says Hi Lionel. This is Lionel Pritchard of Lionel Pritchard and the Wolverington Brothers. Oh my God. We've heard about you, Lionel. Oh my gosh. He says, Lionel says Merrill's a great A fuck up. He has the strikeout record

because he would just swing the bat every time he got up to play. It didn't matter. He would always swing the bat and he has the most strikeouts of anybody in minor league baseball. Lionel, that's enough. That's enough out of you. Merrill says under his breath, he just says, felt wrong not to swing. He walks out.

Cut two, we see Graham is still listening to Merritt Weaver's confession. She's got, she says, Father, I cursed 36 times this week. And she says, wait, is douchebag a curse? And he says, depends on how it was used. that she said, what if you say, Aaron, you're a douchebag for kissing Shirley? And he said, that's a curse. She said, okay, well, then I have 76 curses this week. He's late to pizza.

He rushes back and he tells them, I don't want any of you hanging out with Tracy, whatever her name is, ever again alone. Funny little moment. They're sitting down to eat their pizza when outside of the pizza parlor, they lock eyes on a man walking down the street. They all kind of still, Morgan says, is that him? Merrill says, yep, that guy notices them. He and Graham

share a look and he runs and rushes and like gets in his car and drives away. When they pull up back into the house in the car, we all of a sudden start to hear some static. Morgan pulls out Bo's old baby monitor that he had taken as a walkie-talkie. And they're like, maybe it's picking up static from up there.

And Merrill's like, these crop circles it's not real this is just nerds trying to get attention this is classic nerd stuff people who just like could never get a girlfriend are not cool they're trying to get attention like don't buy any of this but the static is getting louder

and it sounds like it's static but it's also like we hear like wow and they're like click these little noises and Morgan's like it's voices can't you tell it's not English but

It's voices. And Graham and Merrill are kind of like, huh, this does seem kind of weird. I don't know. This doesn't just seem like static. But they're trying to act like it's all totally fine. They're like maybe just picking up another baby monitor. Like, everything's fine.

And Morgan's like, it gets louder as it gets up higher. And so he like climbs on top of the car and he's holding it up and we can hear it and it's getting louder and it is like, wow. And he's holding it up. all like whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa it says and then it cuts out we don't hear anything anymore like okay that was weird that night graham is bringing dinner out to isabel who's still tied up outside and she is just losing her fucking shit she's staring out of the cornfields barking agitated really really upset so graham is like okay i got to go check this out i got to go into this

cornfield, which is like, sir, this is not what we need to be doing. It's pitch dark. Your dog's freaking out about something in that cornfield. Like, perhaps we let this one go. Yeah. But he gets that flashlight. He starts walking through the corn. He's not seeing anything.

We start to hear, we do hear a little, like, clicky noises, turns nothing there, nothing there, makes it out into the crop circle. And he says, we're not going to report this. I'm not going to even tell the, news that this happened like you're not going to get famous so you could just pack up your little hoax just freaking quit it already yeah just could you just cut it out because i don't even care and i'm not even worried and don't even just get out of here uh and so he's like he backs away and he starts to go back home through the corn but he's he's hearing noises and he turns fast and

drops the flashlight and it goes out and he goes to reach for it like in the pitch dark he's trying to find the flashlight and he grabs it and he turns it back on and he illuminates down a like hallway down the corn you know there's like a cleared path cleared path and he just sees one green looking leg just sloop back into the corn no that's not what you want to see runs home who comes inside he's visibly freaked out He sits down at the table. Everyone in the family looks at him. They're like, what's going on?

He says, okay, we can turn the TV on. We can watch the news. They turn the TV on and they see news coverage of hovering lights above Mexico City. It's looking like, these are looking like UFOs. Hovering still 14, they're calling them just 14 lights. And they've been there for hours. They're not moving. Nobody knows what it is.

And the family basically just watches the news until the kids fall asleep. So we cut to it's later that night. Merrill and Graham talking in whispers while the kids sleep next to them on the couch. Meryl's like, some people are saying this is the end of the world. Graham says, could be. And Meryl says, can't you pretend to be like you used to be? Show me some comfort. So Graham says,

people can mainly be broken into two categories two categories in they experience something lucky group one sees it as a sign a sign that they're doing things right that someone's looking out for them that there's magic in the universe group two just sees it as a happy coincidence you know things just work out sometimes sometimes they don't people in that second group look at these 14 lights they ultimately probably probably I feel that whatever happens, they're on their own, and that fills them with fear. Group one, when they see those 14 lights, they're looking at a miracle. And they feel that whatever is going to happen, there's someone looking out for them.

And that fills them with hope. So you have to ask yourself, what kind of person are you? Are you someone who sees signs and believes there's magic out there? Wow. Or is everything just a coincidence? The thesis of the film is too close. Clearly stated. And in response to this,

Merrill says, one time I was at a party and I was sitting on the couch next to Miranda McKinney. She leans in and I knew I was going to get to kiss her. And I lean in to kiss her. I realize, I've got gum on my mouth.

So I turn my head. I take the gum out. I put in a paper cup and when I turn back, she's vomited all over herself. And I know she could have been vomiting into my mouth If I hadn't had that gum, she would have puked into my mouth.

I would have never recovered from that. So, yeah. That was a miracle. I do believe in miracles. I'm a miracle guy. And he says, which one are you? And Graham says, do you feel comforted? Merrill says, I do.

Graham says, then what does it matter? Wow. Wow, Graham. You don't have to be a martyr here. Graham then tells Merrill, he says, Did I ever tell you what Colleen's last words were? Her last words were, see, swing away.

Do you know why she said that? Because the nerve endings in her brain were firing as she died. And a random memory of us being at one of your baseball games played in her head. And that was the last thing she said to me. There is nobody watching out for us. We are all on our own. Okay, well, wait to take that comfort. just right away in his hopeful, hopeful mood.

And suddenly we are, it's nighttime, and we are inside a car being driven by Graham. We see he's wearing his priest outfit. And what do you call it? I literally call it a priest outfit. I don't know what else to call it. I think you're wearing your collar. That's another way to say it. He's wearing his collar.

His collar. And we see he's driving down a dark, empty middle of nowhere road, approaching. Caroline, she's got her hands up to stop him. We see some ambulances, flashing lights. He pulls up. He gets out of the car and goes up to her and she says, Ray fell asleep at the wheel. And he says, what ambulance is she in?

And Caroline says she's not in an ambulance father. Cut back to real time. Graham wakes up on the couch to find that Merrill has moved the TV into the closet. There's like a closet under the stairs kind of vibe. He follows the, like, extension cord to open the closet door. Merrill's in there. Just absolutely glued

to the TV. And Merrill says, I took the TV in here because the kids wouldn't stop watching the news. It's not good for them. They need to be outside playing. And they just had to stop watching the news. But he's clearly been just like glued to this news footage all night. He says, there's a theory about these crop circles. They're

kind of a visual mapping system so that they can navigate. Graham's not really wanting to hear it. He goes to look for the kids. he finds Morgan and Bo in their room with foil hats on their heads and they are reading that extraterrestrial book and dad sits down with them

looks at the book Morgan says the book says there are two reasons extraterrestrials would visit us one for exploration to further their knowledge of the universe or two they're hostile they've used up all the resources on their planet and they're looking to harvest ours

dad's slipping through the book with them and they come upon a picture of a house that looks exactly like their house and they're all like this looks like our house huh just then the phone rings Graham gets up to answer he takes the book with him

he's like I think that's enough of the book for right now he goes to answer the phone man on the other line just says father and then the line goes dead but he grabs his coat opens the closet door to Maryland and he says don't stay here don't let the kids

I'm going to see Ray ready. What's fun about the, like, way that M. Night Chalmala has written this movie, which is unusual for this time, is like, it's not all action, action, action, like aliens are attacking. We need to, like, fight, fight. It's like there's nothing happening. They're not being attacked. Right. They just have the, like, ambient threat of aliens attacking them.

So it gives this family so much time. so much time to just like kind of live and dwell in this possibility and that's really like kind of fun and interesting to witness it also is like what it would feel like probably it's like to take all this time being like I don't know is this for real is it happening is it bad like I don't know if it's bad but it seems weird and like what are we supposed to do but yeah so he says to Merrill like I'm going to go see Ray Reddy and Merrill says why he says I think he just called here Bo and Morgan are, we cut back to them in their room and Bo tells Morgan, she says, I have, I had a bad feeling again. Morgan says, like before, she says, yeah. And then she says, I don't want you to die.

And he says, I'm not going to die. Uh-oh. Cutta Graham arriving at Ray's. We see a sign out front that he, that Ray is the veterinarian. So that also explains why he didn't want to call a veterinarian. for Houdini. This is the Ray that was mentioned as having fallen asleep at the wheel. We see, yes, in fact, it is the same man we saw outside.

The pizza parlor. He is sitting in his truck outside. And so Graham comes up to him. He's in the driver's suit. The car is packed up, ready to go. He's looking shaken. He's kind of looking straight ahead. Graham says, what happened?

Ray says, you know, I worked so long that night. I've never fallen asleep driving before And never since If I had fallen asleep earlier on my drive home There was nobody on the road I would have just driven into a ditch Maybe hurt myself, maybe not It had to have just been

Within that 10 to 15 seconds That she was walking past me on the road It's like it was meant to be Okay well I don't know if we should be saying that To this particular man And he says If this is the end of the world I'm screwed.

People who kill preachers' wives don't exactly get ushered into heaven. Graham's like, where are you going, right? Like, why's your car all packed up? And he says, I'm going to the lake. There's this theory, you know, none of these crop circles are near water, so I figure maybe they don't like water.

So I'm just going to go there. And then he says, he turns to him and he says, I know what I've done to you. I've made you question your faith. I am truly sorry. Scariest thing. Scariest thing that could ever happen. Scariest thing that could ever happen.

Graham, you know, looks at him, holding back tears, wanting to forgive him, you know, really... Look, I'm like, Mel Gibson's doing a great job here. That's the only time I'm going to say it, but he's doing a great job. I mean, he's an ambassador for a reason. It's because he's like, technically, he's technically good at acting. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But everything else we can just say he's a piece of shit.

He's just a huge piece of shit, yeah. And Ray... says to him, Don't open my pantry, father. I found one of them in there, and I locked them in. And then he drives away. Wow. A specimen in a pantry?

Bring me there immediately. Cut back to Merrill, still in the closet, watching that news. And a news broadcaster says, we've just received a video that a man in Brazil took at his daughter's birthday party, and now I should let you all know that all initial reports,

all initial reactions to this video are that it is genuine. This is the birthday party? And I have to warn you that what you're about to see is very disturbing. And Henley, I have to warn you that what you're about to see is very disturbing. Okay. I'm ready. I'm ready.

Okay. I will describe it for those who are not here with us to watch this clip. But we simply have to watch it. Okay. I'm excited. It is an incredible work of cinema. And I am deeply excited for you to watch it. And now Henley, I need you to watch it.

Eyes open. Like, don't shy away. You can handle it, I promise. But it's like, you have to just, like, really watch it. Like, really watch it. Because it's incredible. It's a minute and 35 seconds. I won't blink.

I won't blink. Don't blink. Don't blink one freaking time. Okay. Okay. Let's do it. The startling footage we're about to show you was photographed by a 42-year-old, Romero Valadares. This video was taken yesterday afternoon at his son's seventh birthday in the city of Pasifondo, Brazil.

It was sent to the local news bureau there and sent to us via satellite just a few minutes ago. All initial opinions are this is genuine. What you're about to see may disturb you. Move, children. Move, children. Come, children. Come on us! It's behind!

Oh! He's behind! He's behind! He's behind! He's behind! It's behind! You guys. You guys.

It got me so good. I screamed. Mabel was on my lap and she flew off, scratched my leg. I was like, I was, it got me so fucking good. Yeah. That's definitely the moment that's seared in my brain from the, this movie. And I feel like we've had a few guests bring it up before. It was just like the moment in signs. Like that is an infamous little shot. Paul or someone recently who was like the birthday

party scene in signs. And so when this, when I was watching the movie and this clip started, I was like, this is the thing. This is the scare. Like, what's it going to be? What's it going to be? And it still, I flew out of my fucking seat. Okay. So let me describe it for those who are listening to the podcast. So we're at a child's birthday party. We see chaos of children. running around. We've got the handheld camera trying to look past them outside. We see like an abandoned birthday cake

and balloons. There's like some rustling in the bushes. We can't really see what it is. The kids are screaming. Everybody runs from the like sliding glass door over to this other window. The camera comes up behind them. We're trying to see we're looking down

this alleyway with a street that runs perpendicular. And at the end of the street, it's like wall on one side, hedges on the other. And at the end of the street, there's like a parked car. And we're looking and we're thinking, oh, my God, something's like behind that car, something's hiding behind that car. All the kids are speaking, this is in Brazil, so the kids are speaking in Portuguese until at 1.1 child, thank you for our benefit, speaks English.

And he says, it's behind this alley. And we're looking down this alley. We're looking at this alley where we're looking and we're like, oh, my God, it's going to come out behind this car. It's going to come out behind this car. And then from the other side of the alley, a big green alien just walks across the alley. It's like a seven foot tall man. It's so big. massive massive and look like straight into camera too yeah he's just like oh hello he strikes a little pose you're having a birthday party hello i think the reason the scare is so effective i've been like trying to break it down like why why is it such a good jump scare because you're like you know it's it's not one of those where like the camera pans and all of a sudden there's something there it's like

you're just looking waiting for the thing that's going to scare you and i think the way the shot is framed you're true like at least i think you're like looking at this car like you're like it's like behind the car. Yes. You're like, it's over here. It's over here. It's over here. So then when it comes from the other direction, it's just like, whoa. I didn't see it. It's so effective. I'm, I'm obsessed with it. It's such, such a good little scare. Incredible. I loved it. I, I hadn't remember that at all. I blocked that out completely. I mean, okay, so now we've seen, yes, in fact, these are aliens. They are big. And they don't seem nice. Also, we should say that, like, the fact that this scene is buffeted by walking Phoenix watching it scared out of his mind from a closet.

Yeah. And then the news anchor seeming kind of scared. And then this is really subtle, but like someone walks behind the news anchor during that shot. And I think that gives it a sense of like the rules don't apply. Like it's like people are walking behind the news anchor. We are all, we don't know what to do. Who knows what's going to happen. Well, and there's also like a row of clothing behind watching.

Akeen Phoenix's character, and they're like saying, it's behind, it's behind. So I was also kind of like, does something come out from behind him? Like, you're just on edge. Terrifying from every direction. And also, we haven't discussed it yet, and we'll discuss it more at the end. But obviously, Sixth Sense was Ennight John Malon's first movie, huge success. And then Signs was like also, I mean, wasn't as big as the Sixth Sense, but it wasn't a joke. But it was big. It was a really good movie. Like, it was a solid movie. and there's some stuff that's pretty funny but well it's weird because usually you'd think like the normal cadence of like a genius at work is they have like their first work and then the

sophomore work is kind of like terrible and then after that they get better for my trauma the sophomore work was like kind of okay and then just got so much worse from there yeah which is unusual I'm an apologist I I feel like I love them all. I even love Lady in the Water. Hey, you know what? I'll be brave and say it. You know what?

Maybe we should make a new version of a genius. And maybe it's M Night Shyamalan's version. And maybe someone's just having a little fun. I had, I'm telling you, I had such a good time. Yeah. I'm, and I've also seen The Visit, had a great time in the visit. Old? Visit scared me.

Old. Trap. I'd watch Trapp. I just, I don't got a problem with it. We're having a good time. Yeah. We're having a good time. But yeah, he did go from like awards.

worthy like groundbreaking pieces of cinema to like old trap yeah yeah which again i'm totally fine with it and i love it um okay cut back to graham he has entered ray's house we see it's incomplete disarray upturned tables we see at the far end of the kitchen the pantry door it's being like barricaded shut by a shelf or something and we do see shadows under the crack of the door there's there's someone in there. Graham calls out the police are on their way.

I am the police. I'm a police officer. And we've got your friends. We know all about the hoax. And if you just tell me the truth, just tell me why you did it. I'm going to give you a good deal. So just talk to me. The man is a man of God.

He can't lie. And he believes in the police. He believes. He believes in the power. These are good. But he's not, you know, no response coming from the other side of that door. The alien is like,

police never heard of him. What the fuck does that mean? I don't care about that. So he crouches down. He's like going to try to see under the crack, under the door. So you know, you got to get way too close to that door to do that.

We're nervous. He's crouching down. He's not seeing anything. Looks around the kitchen. He sees a big old knife, kitchen knife, pulls it off the counter, looks at it and realizes it's reflective.

He can use. use it as a mirror, stick it in the under that door, shine it up, see if you can see what's in there. So he's doing that, slowly putting that knife in there, not seeing anything, pulls it out. Dang, nothing's happening. And he's like, you know what, fine, I give up. He gets up to leave. He's like, no, I got to, I got to know what's in that room.

So he grabs a knife again, comes over under the door. He's about to go look under it when we see clawed fingers reach out from under the door. They're gray, nasty, and not human. And he freaks out, slams that knife down, chops two alien fingers off. Wow. Alien screams! Cut away. Oh, no.

Graham comes home to find Morgan, Bo, and Merrill sitting in tinfoil hats on the couch. They're all believers. Meryl says, their skin changes colors. That's why that no one can see them at night. dad i mean he's shaking he knows now their aliens are for real and he says morgan what does your book say the aliens would do if if it turns out they're hostile he says they'd invade they'd use ground tactics hand-to-hand combat they wouldn't use our tech or fight an air battle because they wouldn't want us to use nuclear weapons and destroy the resources they came here for so there's two possible

outcomes either we find a way to defeat them and they come back in maybe a hundred thousand years with reinforcements or they win the dad says okay well um i just saw one and i did have the distinct feeling it wanted to harm me so i do think they're hostile and i just heard this theory that maybe they don't like water so uh i think we should pack everything up and go to the lake and morgan's like i says like let's take a vote you know we can either pack up a go to the lake or we can stay here and ride it out at home. All does in favor of going to the lake. Dad raises his hand.

Bo raises her hand. All is in favor of staying. Morgan raises his hand. Mayor raises his hand. The dad's like, well, I count for two votes because I'm, I'm the parent. So we're going to go to the lake. Morgan says, I don't want to go to the lake. I want to stay here.

This is where mom lived. And then Boe says, oh, I changed my vote. I want to stay here. So we're staying put. No, no, no, no. Okay, you should have done a better job convincing them. Yeah, also, like, do you even have to convince them? I think, like, you can just take your young children. You got to say, we're going to have me a fun little trip to the lake. How fun is this for us as a family? Yeah, we're all going to go to the lake. But no, they decided they're going to stay.

And so the dad says, Graham says, okay, well, we need to board up all the windows because this one had a hard time getting through a pantry door. So that's as much we have to go on. on the news we see there are more lights hovering above more cities and they say that all of these lights are appearing within one mile of these crop circles and Merrill says they're going to be within one mile of here yep you guys remember when those all those lights were popping up and people were like what are all these lights what were they whatever happened last year and New Jersey the drones yeah I was talking to so many people about those drones and then literally today I was thinking about that I was like do those people?

people think I'm crazy because I was bringing up to everyone I met. I was like, have you guys write about those drones? Why are you taking about the drones? Did they ever figure anything out? No, no one ever figured anything out. No, yeah. I think they're, well, oh well, they just kind of, we just stopped talking about them. We just stopped. Well, it's harder now. There's a lot of stuff to talk about. It's harder now because there's so much shit in the atmosphere. Like, there's all the Starlink satellites, which are quite, I mean, it's actually nauseating. If you love, look up the satellites, if you look up like they have 3D models of how many there are, it's like trash in the atmosphere. I went to Yosemite recently and there was a lookout point that

we were told is, you know, gorgeous to look at the stars. And so we went up there in the middle of night. And I had not seen satellites really before. We don't get great views of the stars in Los Angeles, but we just laid looking up at the stars. And it was crazy. There's just satellites like every couple minutes. They're just zooming through the sky constantly. I couldn't believe it. Well, they're providing like very needed internet access to certain people and like regions that didn't have it before. Like those satellites are helping people. But at the same time, it's like, it's just so bizarre to have. I was like feeling very. existential about it because previously looking at the stars is very like, you know, like this

film from technology. Filled with mystery and things we don't understand and seeing the human footprint in the stars was, it really rattled me. It rattled Tim. Tim just had this experience too. When we went glamping, when we stayed in the earth, he had the same thing. We were out looking at the stars and he was like shocked by the satellite activity we were seen. Yeah. Yeah. It was really weird. It is jarring. And I'm not saying there shouldn't be satellites,

but I was just, it just was very bizarre to see the experience of looking at the stars be different. Yeah. That's crazy that we change the experience of what looking at the stars is like. When the satellites break and when they like hit each other, they're like trash remains in the atmosphere. Right. And no one cleans it up. So it's also circulating. So it's like we got satellites. And then we also got the trash satellites. And we will just put trash wherever we go, huh? Yeah. I mean, I imagine that would be a pretty expensive cleanup.

Well, also people don't really care about, like, conservation. You know. Space. Well, also in general. Or anywhere. Yeah. Fair enough. It's scary because it's happened very quickly.

Yeah. It's happened very fast. Yeah. Crazy. Crazy. I mean, I wasted tinfoil for the purposes of making a half. hat just for this and it will be trashed too. No, you can throw that in the recycling bin. So as long as it's not food soiled, there's no food on my head.

You can recycle that. Also, you never know. Like, it could actually be helping. Like, could be helping. Like right now, the aliens might not be able to read your thoughts. And that might actually be making all the difference. Which is good because I don't think they'd like that I'm talking about size. Probably wouldn't like it. They're like the best we've ever looked on screen. How dare you? Why is she saying more things about how good we look? On the news, yes, we've seen more lights. They are appearing within a mile of crop signs.

The news person says they think that these are stages immediately preceding an attack maneuver. Mm-hmm. And the news anchor is really emotional. And he says, you know, all over the world, people are flocking to churches and mosques and synagogues. And may God be with us all. Wow. Graham leaves to go. He's like, I'm going to keep boarding up the windows.

And Merrill stays in the closet with the kids. And he's like, you know, how are you guys doing? You okay? Are you scared? He says, I'm not going to let anything happen to you guys. And Morgan says, I wish you were my dad. And Merrill says, what did you say? Don't ever say anything like that ever again.

We see the time has passed. It's getting dark. Merrill comes downstairs. he says we don't have enough boards for the bedroom windows. Graham says, well, we'll just board up the doors themselves and we'll all sleep downstairs in the family room. And Graham's not seeming great. He's got a thousand yard stare. He answered things in a pretty monotonous tone. He's not doing the comforting of the children that Merrill's been doing. He's he is elsewhere. And Morgan says, what are we going to do about Isabel? And he says, we'll tire up in the garage after dinner. Merrill says, all right, I'm going to go. go make some sandwiches. Boas says, I want spaghetti. Merrill says,

we should just eat something quick. And Graham says, spaghetti sounds great. It always does. Morgan, what do you want? And Morgan says, anything? He says, yep. He says, French toast

and mashed potatoes. And Graham says, perfect. Merrill, he's being weird. Merrill, what do you want? Merrill says, He says, perfect. I'm going to have a hamburger with bacon. Extra bacon.

Cut to the kitchen's an absolute mess. Bulls everywhere. Tons of food out. They're sitting at the dining room table. Somber as can be. Everyone is really upset. Nobody's eating. No one's having a good time.

Nobody's having a good time. They just had all those ingredients for all those things. Yeah, I guess so. Did you go to the grocery store? Didn't go to the store. but nobody's eating everyone's really sad and scared and upset Graham's getting mad he's like Why is everybody eating? We have this big feast in front of us

Now eat Graham Graham Morgan says Can we say a prayer? And Graham's like no we're not saying a prayer Morgan says Beau had a bad feeling and she says yeah I had a dream And dad says we are not praying Wow I don't believe in God anymore He's really hung up the cloth He says your mom is dead and aliens are here And Morgan says, I hate you.

You let mom die. Whoa. Ouch. Bo starts crying. Graham says, I'm not wasting one more minute of my life on prayer. Not one more minute. Wow. We are going to enjoy this meal.

Nobody can stop us from enjoying this meal. So enjoy it. Everybody's crying. Also, hold on. Hold on. Let me just like for a second. this is a common misconception about prayer. I personally don't give a shit about prayer. But let me just speak to prayer for just one second. Please speak to prayer. Prayer is not about like actually changing

anything. Right. No, for sure. So like for him to be like, I'm not wasting my time on prayer. It's like, man, you didn't get it to begin with. Did you never understand this, my love? Like, what were you doing being a priest, my friend? Well, I thought I signed a deal with God and he protects all my loved ones forever and nothing bad ever happens to me again. That's the deal. And if I just say, dear God, don't let my wife die, then she won't die. Right. That's not how it works. It's not how it works.

It's not how it works. Well, you're right. It's very much not because it didn't. And it didn't and it wouldn't and it never will. And if that's what you're resting your faith on, then you will always be disappointed. But prayer is more about just like asking for help. I think it's about not feeling alone. Well, it's about being vulnerable and saying, I don't know what to do.

Can someone help me? and like letting that opening exist and that energy yeah even for a moment if you can believe it i don't really pray but the times that i have prayed i feel it's like writing in a journal like i'm like kind of processing my day and my feelings out loud or in my head but in a way that feels more structured than just like end of the night anxiety and like oh god oh god i got what did i'm scared um dear white male god can you figure white male god yes fix my problems fix my problems because I asked nicely. Anyway, I don't really know about prayer, but I do know that it's not that.

It's not for that. I do know that it's not that. Yeah. Yeah. Well, you know, he's having a really hard time. Okay. And everything's pretty bad. And so, yeah, he does. He overreacts and everyone's really crying. Everyone's really upset. Kids are crying. He's crying. And then he's getting all worked up. And he says, all right. Well says, you're not going to eat. I'm going to eat some of everything. And grabs a big piece of French toast. He puts on his plate and he cuts a big bite and he shoves in his mouth and he's chewing and he's crying and Morgan comes up to him and hugs him. And they're really sobbing and then Bo comes over and she hugs him and Graham grabs Marilyn he pulls him into this hug and they all hug and cry and are together. And if you can believe

it, they're all just very scared. Yeah. And also that's the point of prayer is to be together and to like allow yourself to connect with someone else. Their moment, unfortunately, as interrupted by that baby monitor, it turns on and it's picking up some chitter-chatter sounds. And it sounds close. These are louder and closer than what we've gotten before. Oh, boy. Graham gets up. He goes over to the closet to go check the TV signals down.

We're not getting any reception. Uh-oh. And he says, it's happening. They're here. they're here they're here so they go upstairs to board up the last of the bedroom doors and as they're doing it graham says to bow he says did i ever tell you what happened when you were born beau you didn't even cry you just came out and he looked up at everyone with your big eyes and you looked like an angel everyone said they'd never seen such a beautiful baby and he looked at me and you smiled and they

say babies can't smile at that age but you did you smiled oh they all go downstairs and they're together in the living room and we hear isabel are really barking and morgan says we forgot about isabel and we hear her barking and barking her barking's getting louder she's gotten really upset really really upset and then we don't hear any barking anymore oh yeah and then we start sounds outside the house and we're following we're hearing the sound moving past the house keep them going walking around walking the perimeter we can hear these sounds these little skimperin scamperin and they're getting scared and merrill says should we turn off the lights and graham says they already know we're here which good job like don't turn the lights off

that doesn't help but we're getting scared we're hearing it's getting louder. They start rattling in the front door. We're looking around. We're freaking out. So Graham grabs Morgan and he says, Morgan, did I ever tell you about when you were born? When you were born, your mom was really bleeding so they had to fix her up. They took you

out of the room before I even got to see you. But the whole time they were fixing her up, she just kept asking about you. She just wanted to see you. Crash. Merrill says. They're on the roof. You know, I wanted I wanted your mama to see you first. So when they brought you in, they place you in your arms and she just looked up at you and you just stared at each other for the longest time. Crash, Merrill says, they're in the house. And she looked up at you and she said, hello, Morgan, I'm your mama. You looked just like I dreamed. Hearing wrestling is getting louder. We all look up. We look up and we see the attic door and we realize we did not board up that attic door. So everybody's running down to the basement.

We're going into the basement. As we're going down, we see under the front door, one of those nasty gray little clawy hands creeping under the door trying to get the door open. They get into the basement just in time. They shut the door. They're bracing themselves against. They're like, how do we get this door?

We need to find something to wedge against it to keep it shut. Aliens are in the house. We hear them in the house. They're banging on that basement door. Just in time, Merrill finds a big old axe. He's like, here I got it. Grabs it. As he grabs it, it shatters a light bulb.

It gets pitch dark. Oh, man. They get it under the doorknob just in time. The doorknob's rattling, but the door is wedged shut. But we're in pitch darkness. Morgan finds a couple flashlights, illuminating the basement below. And we hear a lot of banging happening upstairs.

But Graham's like, they're just banging. They're not trying to get in. They're just making noise. Why? Are they trying to seem tough? Yeah, they're trying to seem really tough. Yeah. Hey, hey, hey, we're in here, man.

They're like, we're throwing down a beat. Can someone lay in a freestyle? We're trying to party, guys. Do freestyle right now. Merrill says, they're distracting us. And Morgan says, the book said they'd be really good problem solvers, and they'd find a way to get in. Thank God, this book is so accurate. It's amazing how humans know everything.

That's what we thought in 2002. Yeah, we'll have this figured out for sure. and Graham says they used to pour coal in this basement so there's a coal shoot in here somewhere we've got to find it so they start walking along the perimeter meryl on one side gram the other

they're feeling around in the dark like try to see if you can feel the air coming in they're like I feel it it's getting closer it's getting closer point our flashlights we see a grate in the wall you know to some sort of tunnel behind it and Morgan's standing in front of it and they've got their flashlights on

and they're like great we found it and just then from the shoot itself and the black metal grate a hand reaches through and grabs Morgan and is pulling him against the grate and they're like oh no drop the flashlights there's just a shuffle we don't see what's happening it's dark screaming oh no get Morgan get Morgan flashlight comes back on we see merrill has stacked up like bags of cement in front of the grate fuchs that's handled he's got bow shine the flashlight over to graham and morgan morgan's in graham's lap and he's having an asthma attack and they realize we don't have his medicine no and he's well that was pretty short-sighted pretty short-sighted he's gasping for air graham's got him against his chest and he's saying breathe Morgan we're going to get through this breathe feel my chest feel my chest breathe like me take some breast you're okay you're okay feel my chest breathe in breathe out stay strong it'll pass but he's really

having a hard time he's like gripping his leg oh beau it's like I dreamed this I dreamed this oh no and Graham has got Morgan in his lap and he's saying under his breath he says don't do this to me again don't do this to me I hate you oh my god this guy just is he really didn't understand like

in seminary he was really getting a lot of the wrong messages he really viewed it as personal gain or personal tragedy but he says to Morgan

he says Morgan believe it's going to pass the air is coming believe don't be afraid believe we look over at Meryl and Bo.

We see Meryl is mouting something to himself. We think maybe a prayer. Mm-hmm. Slowly, Morgan starts taking breaths. Ah. Ah. Oh. Do you know what?

To be fair, this is literally me earlier today when I had many coughing fits. I keep having coughing fits. Oh. And like, and I choke. and I can't breathe, and I have to, like, go and get a cough drop immediately. And if I can't have a cough drop, then I don't know what happened. You have to believe this one, but I literally have that moment of being like, you're fine. Just breathe.

Just breathe. It's like, it's like I don't want to think of it as Mel Gibson in my brain because that's probably that's possible. You might have to now. You might have to. You might have a choice. You're fine. You're fine.

Just get your cough drops. You're fine. You're going to make it. through this you're going to make it through this um so we're okay we're okay for now the moments past merrill says we should save the flashlights and so they turn the flashlights off in the basement is plunged into darkness wow we're hearing sirens we're seeing cut back to that memory of driving up caroline waving him down getting out of the car she tells graham gray swerved and he hit Colleen, and then he hit a tree

pinning her between the tree and the car. Oh, that's fucked up. The truck has severed most of her lower half. She won't be saved, but her body is pinned in such a way that it's alive when it shouldn't be, and the

truck is holding her together. No. She doesn't feel much and she's talking. Nope. But we didn't pull the truck out because we want to do to be with her as long as she's still awake, but it won't be very long. She says, father, do you understand what I'm telling you? And he says, this is the last time I'm going to talk with my wife.

And she says, yes, it is. Oof. Back on Graham's face in the basement. And the lights are on. He opens his eyes. Merrill says, I found some light bulbs. And Graham says, how long have we been to sleep? And he says, about 12 hours, which I was like, Jesus Christ.

12? You've been sleeping for 20. 12 hours? Are they recovering from the plague? Like, why are they? What? So tired. Scary night of your lives

and you've been sitting for 12 hours. That was really unexpected. I would be lucky if I would get 45 minutes in this situation. If any, yeah, 12 full hours. And Merrill has found a radio and has turned it on. And the radio

broadcast is saying the aliens have left. They weren't here to harvest our resources. They were here to harvest us. They have a poison gas. They secrete in small. This is Merrill telling him what he heard in the news. The poison gas, they secrete in small amounts. A lot of people died. But they left real fast this morning. Something must have scared them off. People must have found out a way to beat them. I mean, everybody has a weakness. And they're like, oh my God. The aliens are

gone. Wait, wait, hold on. Sorry. They were getting a... They were poisoning humans and taking them with them. Okay. Harvesting the humans. Okay. Okay. But something scared them off. They're gone. They left. They all left really fast this morning. Pennsylvania's clear, they say. What? And Graham can't believe it. And Merrill says to him, you didn't think we'd make it through the night, did you? He shakes his head. And Merrill says, there are some things I can take and some things I can't. One thing I can't. One thing I is when my older brother, who's everything to me, starts losing faith and things. I saw it in your

eyes last night. I never want to see your eyes like that again. Promise. And Graham. Nods. I mean, yeah, it's the scariest thing. It's the scariest thing. They look over to Morgan who's sleep still, but his

breathing is still, it sounds quite labored. He's not doing great. And Graham says if he has another attack while he's like this, They're like, I know we have to get him his medicine, but we have to be sure that they're actually gone. You know, how do we know?

And they see in Morgan's pocket that baby monitor. They pull it out. They turn it on. Nothing. And they're like, okay, it's good enough for me. Graham picks the kids up. Merrill walks up the stairs, goes out into the house. Everything's calm.

It's been absolutely ransacked. The aliens had a huge party. but he gives them all clear we're good graham comes upstairs he lays morgan down on the couch he tells maryl grab a syringe he might need an epinephrine shot he's like okay and beau comes in the room and she says they're doing this on the tv she's dancing and graham says they're dancing and she says yeah like this and he's like oh my gosh wow they're celebrating and he says uh morgan do you want to see it And Morgan says, yeah, so he goes to get the TV out of the closet. He goes in the closet, he unplugs it.

He starts wheeling it into the living room. He's wheeling it in. And we're close up on the black screen of the TV. And I see wheels it into the living room. We see in the reflection. Big alien! No! In the living room.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I remember this one really getting me too. I actually got confused when we watched the clip because I thought maybe they both happened at the same time because I remembered there's a reflection in the TV and so I thought I was like scared he was going to turn it off or there was going to be one in there with them. Oh, it's a good one. It's a good scare. Go home with your friends. It's a good scare. I know. I'm like, what's this guy's playing? Like, everybody else left. Why are you still here? But Graham slowly turns around to see this. He got so drunk, you guys. He's way, he didn't even know everybody left. What time is it? He's slept for 12 hours.

he's holding Morgan he's got Morgan in his arms Morgan's pretty limp the alien is he's staying there he's holding them and we see that this alien is missing two fingers wow he has a bandetta against this family

wow Merrill comes into the room sees the alien drops the syringe everyone's at a standstill we're looking at alien alien's looking at us he's standing he's holding Morgan we're all just like uh uh The alien has this like a little nasty spike thing

that comes out of his wrist and it's like hovering over Morgan's face this little nasty hand spike cut to memory one last time of Graham approaching his wife to talk to her and she tells him tell Morgan to play games and that it's okay to be silly

tell Bo to listen to her brother because he's always going to look out for her and tell Graham see and he says I'm here honey she says tell Graham to see and tell Merrill to swing away

she dies cut back to the memory earlier of Graham and Merrill sitting on the couch and Graham says to Merrill so you have to ask yourself is it possible that there are no

coincidences. Back in the living room, we see that Meryl is standing right next to his record-breaking bat on the wall. Hell yeah. Fuck yeah. And Graham looks at him and he says, Meryl

swing away. Oh, my God. And Meryl looks up. He sees that bat. He grabs that bat. Meanwhile, aliens just watching all this happen, not doing a goddamn thing. Stop it. This is actually amazing. It's incredible. It's incredible.

He grabs that bat. And then finally the alien's like, oh, shoot, he has a bat. And he sprays the poison in Morgan's face. Merrill takes that bat and he whacked that alien with the bat. He drops Morgan. Graham grabs Morgan, grabs the medicine. Meryl's swinging the bat at the alien, hitting him because he's so good at baseball.

And as he hits the alien, alien backs up, stumbles into the credenza, and a glass of water, one of Bose glasses of water falls off the credenza, spills water on the alien. The water is like acid on the alien's skin. It burns away and the alien goes, ah! And they all have this light bulb moment. Oh my God, we're in a room full of cups of water. And Merrill starts sweet that bat and he's knocking cups of water onto alien and beating the shed out of the alien and water's falling on him. we have a close-up with a water cup dripping water down on this alien who's like, ah!

Graham takes the kids outside, he lays Morgan down, he stabs epinephrine shot in his leg, but he's not coming to. Meanwhile, we just see this alien getting absolutely fucking destroyed by four ounce cups of water. Triumphant music is playing. We see the bat is now destroyed, shattered into pieces. The alien has been defeated. Merrill comes outside. We're sitting in front of Morgan's body. Morgan is not coming to. But Graham is sitting with him and Graham is saying, no, no, no, his lungs were closed. His lungs were closed. It's not a coincidence. It's not a coincidence. His lungs were closed. He's going to be okay. He's going to be okay. Bo's crying. Meryl's like, Graham, Graham, we're like, oh God, oh God, Morgan's dead. But Graham believes Graham's saying, nope, it's not a coincidence. It's not a coincidence. He's fine. He's fine. He's fine. And then we hear, Dad.

Morgan is alive and Morgan says did somebody save me and Graham says yeah baby I think someone did my white male gods stop it and we pull back and now we're back we're looking at the scene through the second story window that we looked through the first scene and the camera pans slow pan through the house through the windows as the seasons change very new moon and we're seeing out the window now it's snowing and we see a picturesque white snowy lawn and I'm like thank God these guys didn't come in the winter like they can't touch water oh yeah well they probably thought of that they probably they probably thought of that they probably knew that they probably knew that uh they came to a planet that was 75% water but they knew and we we pan over to the side

of the bedroom and we see Graham come out of his bathroom in his priest outfit. Oh yeah. All he needed was cold hard proof. Yeah. All he needed was proof that God was there to save him and him alone. All he didn't know is that his wife died so that his brother could know to swing a baseball bat at the alien and save his son. That was God's plan. So when people come to him and they say, why is this terrible thing happening to me? He can say, well, it's just because you're not a priest and you're not as good as I am. Or it's just, it's just so that God can tee you up for like another thing down the line. Yeah, yeah, yeah, right,

right. Pay attention to any last words anyone has, because it's going to be clues for later. If they seem weird and random, probably it's a clue. It's what it is, it's a clue. And he's buttoning up his little cuffs and we hear the sounds of children laughing. Screen fades to black.

And that's signs, baby. Wow. I remember the first time seeing it because Because I was not a seasoned movie watcher at that point, just being like, having my mind absolutely blown by the cups of water. It's so funny. Oh, my God. What fantastic filmmaking.

And I mean, and it's, and it is. And it is. It's so funny. I, I was so delighted. It's the funniest thing in the world. world. Okay. So this is speaking to like an actual personal problem I have, which in our house, we call it water blindness. I have water blindness. Do you guys have water blindness? I have restaurant blindness. I have so many types of blindness, but one of them is water blindness where I will, I will have

cups and cups and cups of water that I have taken and filled halfway and taken a sip of and then put down and then forgotten about and then gone into the cupboard and get another cup and take a sip of. And then also, I don't know which cup is mine and which cup belongs to anyone else. So I will drink out of anyone's cup. Anyone's cup is my cup. And I was walking around this world thinking everyone acted the exact same way literally until recently. Like Tim was like finally, I guess it was eight years of him putting up with this. And like a couple of years ago, he was like, what's going on? Can you stop taking my water and why are there so many cups everywhere? Stop taking my water.

I've been holding on this for eight years. Always take my water. He was keeping it on the inside. I mean, I've been doing this my whole life. I've never acted a different way. This doesn't happen only because I always drink out of my big stupid water bottle. I was going to say I don't have this problem either because I drink out of a 32 ounce glass jar that I've filled to the brim. You guys don't think I also have a 32 ounce glass jar that I'm drinking out of?

There's a gazillion other fucking huge cups out there. There's so many. I guess I'm a little protective of my water. I'm like, because Duncan sometimes will like, grab, take a little sip of mine. And I'm like, that's mine. That's my wine. Don't you fucking dare. See, this is a perfect example of Sammy.

If you and I live together, I wouldn't think twice about it. I would be, I mean, if it's like your actual water jug that you're constantly, I wouldn't drink out of that. But if it's like a nondescript, like, cup, I will drink out of any cup in the house. It's my cup. in the house it's in the house in the house specifically not at like a restaurant my house my cup my house my cup and now with that we're adding more people to the house it makes that situation a little bit more tricky you know not currently adding more right they've been added they've been added no no I mean just checking in I don't know adding all these water drinkers into the house that I don't know

We've added a little process of constantly adding more people to our house Who like to drink water, how dare they Anyway, it's something I've tried to I'm aware of it now but I can't help myself It's like I can't stop myself from my water blindness I have no control over it. I feel like I carry my water cup around with me I think is part Not like in my hand constantly but like when I move from room to room

I bring my water with because I'm always thirsty. Yeah, it's like a safety blanket for me. I need like, I'm just now, I'm like, I got to have here. No, I know. As we're talking about water, I'm like, well, I'm dying of thirst now and I need to have some water. I'm looking around the room and there are four water cups in here. Well, it might be the thing that saves your life.

Exactly. So here's the thing. But why wouldn't the aliens have, like, thought of that? It's really, it's pretty silly. It's pretty bad plan. It's so funny that when they realize this, they go, well, I guess, we just need to throw, like, use the baseball bat to get all these, like, get a fucking hose. Like, just go get a hose right now.

Right. Like, also, the, the fact that this, I'm telling you, the amount of time they all spend standing around looking at each other being like, oh, oh, oh. And, like, this alien fully watches him, like, grab a bat, grab it off the wall. And then he's like, oh, like, it's like, it's so funny. It's so funny. I am obsessed. I love it.

Obsessed. Also, the whole movie, I was just like, oh, it's so clever. They, like, very rarely show you, like, the actual alien. You're just getting, like, little bits and pieces or, like, far away.

Or even that, like, that video, like, birthday party video, it's like, it's not. And so I was like, oh, they're, like, making a deliberate choice that it's scarier to not, like, show you the full thing. And at the end, they're like,

here's the guy. And he's just standing around. It's really silly. It's incredibly silly, and I love it. It's perfect. Amnichamelon, yeah, he shines in like interpersonal dynamics, and that is what made six cents so good and signed so good, too. It's like, that's what was compelling about it, was the aliens were interesting, but it was like also, it was the family story and it was the family dynamic. And like Abigail Breslin, she's really cute, an amazing find. Like,

she is an unbelievable actress. And to have her, this is her first film, like, unbelievable. as a seven-year-old. I mean, kids shouldn't work, but... Yeah, they shouldn't work. She did a great job. Well, now we have AI, and AI should exclusively be used for children acting.

Interesting. It's a wist, weird. You guys aren't Tilly Norwood fans? I can't even begin. It feels like extra gross and disturbing that it's like a young woman. Right.

We can make this young woman do anything we want because she's not real. Oh, I really hate it. I really hate it a lot. I eat it so much. This young woman won't ever complain about anything because she's not real. Yeah. Anyway.

For now, for now. I mean, she'll come to life eventually. She'll come to life eventually is the thing. Kill every director she ever worked for. Exactly. Exactly. And only directors. And only directors.

Maybe a producer or two. It depends how involved they are. But this made me think of another question, which is, you know, an hypothetical situation that all of humanity dies, right? Of course. Including us? Yeah, including us. Us too?

Yeah, no, no, we're included. So would you guys prefer for that to be because of us, for humanity to kill us? Would you prefer for it to be a mother nature situation or like Earth kills us? Or would you prefer for it to be an intelligent, alien life form that kills us. This is a very funny question because I really, I mean, options one and two are happening, so it's hard. It's, I feel like also just like, I mean, at that point, you know, who cares?

At that point, I do understand. I care the most about how fast it happens. I want whatever option, like I don't want to know it's coming and I don't want it to happen and to mean to not know that oh i'm dead like and so is everybody else whatever this is another dark thing i like feeling i had during this which is in all the news broadcasts how just everything is being portrayed as it is actually happening and it's we're all on the same page globally about the aliens is something that happened in the movie contact too where the the government and news were just like very open and honest about everything that was happening.

Oh, sure, yeah. And that feels almost more unrealistic than the threat of an alien attack. Like, being given the information as it's happening is like, I just feel like that would never, never happen in real life. And like, there's no way we'd have like a moment of like, well, we're all live on the news and like, hold your loved ones close because this is it. It's like that moment's never going to occur. And so that feels very.

Monoculture is gone, including with news. Like news monoculture is also gone. I completely agree with that. Where it's like there's a sense of community back then, even in 2002, where we're all watching the local news, like a sense of community of like, okay, we're all watching the same thing. We're all watching the same home videos. Certainly it's true if this is what they're telling us. Yeah. Right.

And now we have a president who's literally retweeting like, AI slop about like the most gratuitous, violent things ever. And it's the president of the United States. And that's happening today. Yeah. I mean, it's just like the like there's a hundred million different realities that people live in. And so the thought of like having a consensus on like, hey, we need to like treat this one threat seriously is like, yeah, well, that's not real. Yeah, that's not going to happen. That's going to happen. That's going to happen. Um, but. to answer your question, I don't know. I think, yeah, I'll go option C just because it seems It's the most interesting. It's the most interesting. A grab bag of what can be. I think I go with

B. I think I want Mother Nature to do what she intends to. Yeah, I mean, she's doing it. I know. And I think that that's the natural way of things. Yeah. I mean, I don't want it to be the asteroid. Can I just say that? I don't want that one. Yeah. yeah unless it hits you right away it could hit you and you don't see it coming but we're gonna see it comes from it comes from behind and you don't turn around the whole time and you don't even know I don't want the thing of like the the count down period of fear yeah I don't want that although maybe we'd like have such a fun time I do remember the moment in a quiet place part two being like so deeply scared just by the moment of them at their kids baseball game and seeing a huge asteroid

just like flying through the sky. And that happened a little bit in Alien Earth too where when the thing is like crash, the spaceship is crashing down. Like seeing a huge object falling from the sky would be so scary. It would be so scary. And, but like, yeah, I also don't want to get plunged into an ice age, you know. totally totally totally I totally feel you on that totally I totally agree oh man yeah yeah I am not equipped for that nah I ain't even equipped to wear pants and a sweater I could not me either I could not simply could not I can't crack that combo I can't crack it well we're gonna have to start praying shoes in the mix my god we're gonna have to start praying yeah to God

with very God specific and we know which one and yes exactly and we're going to have to give very specific requests of how we want life to go and that he's just going to have to honor that he he is just going to have to yeah of course that's i think that's the takeaway from the movie that's the moral of the story is that if you lose your faith you just need to have an extraterrestrial attack to restore it to restore it an extraterrestrial attack that proves if you just ask ask enough that God is on your side. God will pay attention.

And it has been since your wife died. Right. That was actually good. That actually the worst thing that ever happened to you is actually a clue for later. It was a clue. And your wife died so that your family could live. Look for clues in the trauma. Your wife was a martyr for a greater cause.

Yeah. Again, I... That's all good wives are. I will argue vehemently against that, which is that there are. is no white male god in the sky. I'm so sorry. Disappointing. Well, that's what you think. And I see you as someone who's lost her faith and I'm terrified. I know. A good woman losing her face. No. I know. I know. I know. It's so, it's like so ridiculous. But I do, I do think about this a lot because obviously this is Tim's profession. And I feel like for me more and more, like not to get

You're the calling of your home. Yeah. Not to get too real, but I feel like I'm the calling and I'm about to be pinned against a tree. Would suck. It sucks. No. I think that God is just humans acting in harmony with each other. Like that's all God is.

That's it to me. And like the only way to like reach God, God is to be vulnerable. She's doing air quotes. I'm doing your quotes. It's to be vulnerable and open up yourself to the podcast. possibility of connection to other people. And like that's literally God. That's it. And God is like humans acting together. No, that's really lovely. That's literally it. Well, we just answered one of life's biggest questions. We just did it. Oh, I know. If anyone wants an update on where I am in my

spiritual journey, that's it. And I don't have much else to say. What God is. That's it to me, personally. That's how I think of it. Don't walk it back. Now, I think that is what it is. You said, you said what God is. Okay, if, no, here's the thing. If everyone, if I could say that and everyone agreed, like, okay. Okay, so don't walk you back. So stop trying to, trying to minimize it.

Shut the fuck up. Shut up. That's God. And Henley decided. And we all agree. And we all agree. Her husband's a priest. So.

God, we don't. just have to hope no one makes it to the end of these episodes. I'm still listening. I hope no one ever makes it to the end. I hope when we put these out that people never make it to the end. No one's still listening, right? No, no one's still listening. That's what I'm planning on. They've left long ago. Besides my own. They've left long ago. White male God. Okay. I've been wearing a tinfoil hat for two hours. Honestly, you look so cute in it. It's not comfortable. Oh, take it off. I assumed it was because you make it look comfortable. It was for a while, but I've started to be really, aware of it on my head. Is your head warm at all? It's a little warm. Oh, it's boiling. It's burning. It's

burning up. You're giving yourself a perm by accident. You look exactly the same. Yeah, it looks like a big Hershey kiss. Well, thank you, Emily, for that perfect recap and that making your head uncomfortable for two hours. That's my pleasure. It enhanced the experience. I appreciate it enhanced it for me as well. I thought immediately, I got to make one of those hats. Yeah. I love you guys so much. I love you guys so much. I love you listeners so much if you are listening.

Probably not. I hope not. And not really any voices. It's just like little Abigail Breslin who's like, there's monstrous out of my room, can I have a glass of water? Mom's here too scary and watch. Bye. Bye.

We didn't. We made it. Thank you all for listening to another episode of Too Scary Didn't Watch. If you enjoy the show, please remember to subscribe and rate us on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, five stars only, or we will haunt you. And if you simply can't get enough of us, we have good news for you. We have lots of bonus content available on our Patreon at patreon.com slash TSDW podcast. You'll get access to video trailer reactions, two bonus episodes a month, the power to vote for upcoming episodes and more. And last but not least, you can follow us on social media at TSDW podcast. We'll be back next week with a new episode.

We love you. That was a hate gum podcast.