Tooth & Claw: True Stories of Animal Attacks - The Three-Day Supermarket Standoff with a Bear - News Stories Including an Influencer and a Rattlesnake, a Wild Hog Fixin' to Do Some Mowin', and a Sinister Plot Against a Show Goat

Episode Date: January 13, 2025

The Tooth & Claw guys wrangle up a batch of recent animal attack headlines for discussion. Afterwards, Jeff presents one of the trickier collection of categories ever featured on the show. Watch here: https://youtu.be/pb_SFRPK6sw ~~ To advertise on the show, contact us! ~~ Tooth & Claw is brought to you by QCODE. Support the show and get access to an extensive library of exclusive episodes like this by supporting the show on Patreon or joining the Grizzly Club on Apple Podcasts. For the latest updates on the show and all things wildlife, follow us at toothandclawpod.com and social:  Instagram: @ToothandClawPodcast Twitter: @ToothandClawPod Wes: @GrizKid Jeff: @jefe_larson Mike: @mikey3ds Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In Claw podcast, we have our wildlife expert, biologist, lover, West Larson. Yeah. Lover of animals and women. My girlfriend, Jesse. In different ways, though. The love manifests in different fashions. Yeah, I tried to clarify that. I think I just made it even murky here.

Yeah, you did. And then I am the lover's brother, Jeff Larson. Yeah. Still weird, man, but we always call each other. other always. Producer Mike Smith. I was kind of considering stirring a little bit of shit up at the start today. Oh, okay. Between who? Between me and you. Oh, all right. Been a while. Yeah, we need this. Every once in a while, just keep you on your toes, Wes. Mike was like, oh, great, not again. And then, now he's all excited. Yeah, I'm going to have to start looking for another job again. I knew it was

It's either going to be between me and Jeff or Mike and Jeff. Yeah. You guys are free to stir up shit whenever you want, all right? We don't have shit between us. Thank you for permission. Last year was a good year for Tucson Cloud. We got in some, like, HBO money. You know, I'm feeling pretty rich comparatively.

And I was like, what do rich people get each other as gifts? Yeah. So I got all of us a robot. Right. And the first day that Wes gets his robot, he's like, hey, can I return? turn this to get scuba gear? Yeah. Because I have nowhere to put it.

It's like a small robot. What? I don't. I don't. It was a great gift. And like, I do feel bad about this. But it was very nice of you. I have so many little gizmos and gadgets and everything.

And they're all just sitting in a box in my, I don't use that stuff. I just don't really like it. Like I've got all sorts of weird Alexa shit that I never use. I just don't really care for that kind of thing. So for me, it was just kind of like, I thought it was really thoughtful and nice, but I just know I'm not going to use it. Did you even try?

I mean, it's a robot. It's a robot. I didn't want to open it because... You can dance with it? I knew that I wanted to send it back. Using it like all the time. But yeah, turn it on and rub its belly every once in a while to make it like giggle.

I'm sure if I turned it on and plugged in, I would have like a great half hour with it. And then I would probably never use it again in my life. And that's just that I know myself. And that's just that I know myself. And you just pull out a robot. I'm not going to. And like put it to dance mode.

I don't think people would enjoy that. I just don't think I'm going to do it. This is crazy. You don't think people would be like, oh man, Wes is pretty rich. He has a robot. I don't feel very rich. Number one. I don't think I'm rich.

That's where we're just kind of joking about it. Number two, I share a house with someone. It's a small house. Jesse would not want me to have my robot anywhere in our shared space. So it would go in my shed. And in the shed, I'm not allowed, A, to have things on my table because Mike gets mad at me if I have anything on my table. That's true. If there's a tissue, if there's a moat of dust on my table, Mike gets mad at me.

And I don't really have anywhere else to put it. So I wouldn't be able to show it off at parties either. So I just thought, this was really nice of Jeff, but I should probably get something a little. little more practical. I told him you can't return it. Yeah. You can give it to Brent or something if you want, but you can't return. Do that.

Don't talk to Jeff. Don't even consult Jeff about it. Just do it and let Jeff continue thinking that you're living in harmony with the robot that he so generously gifted you. It was really good. You like a nice present. Right, Mike? I love my robot.

I keep putting little like food magnets in its hands. When we get together, if we connect them, they'll sink up and like fight each other and stuff. It's going to be. awesome. So it's like a bonding thing. So if you return it, you just like won't be part of the club. Yeah, I'll have to sit and think about that. If you return it, I'm not getting you a gift for a year. Jeff, that's not how this works.

You don't like my gifts. I've liked a lot of your gifts. Dude, your beetle I gave you is hanging up on my wall right now. Okay, but if you had to said, if you had to said, hey, Wes, I don't actually, I actually don't really like this type of beetle. and I might just get some, I might return and grab something else. I'd be like, yeah, sure. Like that's how gifts work.

Sometimes you get someone something they don't want. You're misunderstanding. I gave you that beetle and you left it when you moved out and didn't want my breath. Yeah, that beetle. That beetle. This is crazy. I just wanted us all to put our robots together and then to dance together. Yeah, I'm sorry I ruined that dream for you.

Well, you stirred some shit. You did what you promised. Yeah. I do think you're a good gift giver though, Jeff. I do. I don't know. I think I'm a good one too. I think when I don't give you what you asked for, you never really like it.

That's not true. You've given me lots of good stuff. Remember those like Texas longhorns I gave you. That was my first time. You gave me long horns that were like 12 feet long. The beetle I loved, but the beetle had mites in it that were eating it from the inside out. So I actually think those were from your apartment. Okay.

Could have been. I cleaned out every single bug in it, and then they went back in there. So then I moved it, and now they don't go in. Got it. I love the beetle, though. Well, how about we give a gift to our listeners and deliver unto them an episode to celebrate the new year? That is a pretty good transition. Straight from it.

Someone had to do something there. No, I like it. You're right. We're doing our news episode. It's been kind of a little. a little while. It might feel recent to people since we did some news stuff for the end of the year episode, but that wasn't officially a news episode. So the stories have been building up, and we just got to get them out there. We got news blue balls.

Exactly. So first news episodes are 2025, and we're doing only stories that have happened in 2025. So Wes, what you got? Oh, whoa, hold on. That's not true. Jeff's throwing all sorts of curveballs. I do have a good first one. Do you want me to go first? Sure. Okay. So something you guys might not know about me,

if you were to look at my explore page on Instagram, you're mostly going to see pictures of reptiles. Because I really like looking at pages on Instagram that are devoted to herping. And herping is pretty much like looking for collecting, usually not collecting, Usually just looking for sometimes handling different snakes, lizards, turtles, amphibians. I don't like the boink or yoink or whatever guy. The yonker.

Yeah. I like my favorite herpers tend to be the ones that take photos of the animals in situ, which means in the situation they found it in. So they took a photo of it just kind of in its natural setting. But I'm fascinated by it because there's so many types of snakes and lizards and everything out there in the world. They're so beautiful, and I think the photography around them is often really creative and beautiful, too. Anyway, as I was kind of getting into this obsession, I found this page that was, I think it was called like Herper Circus or something, and it was devoted toward people that Herp that are being irresponsible or get bit or do crazy things. That's like Tourons of Yellowstone.

Yeah. And they did feature this kid quite a bit. And this person they featured, his at was adventurin. His middle name is Orin, and his name is like Advent Orin. So adventurin. It's like adventuring. That's funny. Yeah.

The names people come up with, you know? Yeah. He's got a ton of followers. He's got like a million and a half followers now, especially since this incident happened that we're going to talk about. But I noticed he had worked with Coyote Peterson in the back. He's one of these people who, I think goes pretty hard with wildlife in order to get views.

And I'm just going to kind of not get too deep into that. I should mention he's really, really, really into Jesus. His bio reads, I'm David Oren, a 25-year-old slave to Christ. Yeah, he's got a poem that's all about why you shouldn't masturbate. He's got lots of... The hero? The hero. Yeah.

His stuff is. very, it's very, very religious to like a pretty high level and his wife's as well. They're young. That's pretty intense. Yeah. Anyway, some other rep pal experts I follow do have some issues with this guy. So I just want to bring that out. Some other herping pages I follow also really like him.

So we're not going to get too deep into him personally, his choices around wildlife. I do think there's some things that he's done that are, that aren't great. Like there's a video of him catching a wild badger that I just think, like you should shouldn't do that. You shouldn't go out there and harass wildlife. Or masturbating. You probably don't think he should be doing that either. I actually think he probably should. You know, might help him. Oh, wow. Playing with the snake, as it were. Leave the animals alone a little bit. Get some of that aggression else. Or not aggression. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway. But lately, I've been looking

at his page daily, and there's a reason for that. On December 18th, he was out with some friends and some people from, I think, a church group in the Gulf Coast in northern Florida. And they were having a hard time finding many herpes, snakes and lizards and stuff. And they were about to leave. And he noticed a piece of bark, a tree that had fallen. And the bark was kind of perfect habitat for hiding a snake. And he went over there to try and lift it. And as he was approaching it, he felt something clamped down on his leg.

And he said the pain was so intense and so crazy that he thought he was going to look down and see an eight-foot alligator biting his leg. leg. But what it actually happened is he had been bitten by an Eastern Diamondback rattlesnake. This isn't a snake we've talked about on the podcast yet. We've talked about Western Diamondbacks. This is like their beefier, bigger cousin that lives out east. This is the biggest venomous snake that we have in the United States. And I think maybe aside from like possibly an Eastern coral snake, this is the last snake you want to get bitten by in the U.S. This is a very, very, very dangerous snake.

For rattlesnakes, it's the worst. It is the worst. The Mojave Rattler has like some weird neurological effects and stuff. And some of the other snakes have some interesting cocktails. But this is the one that's going to give you the most venom. And it probably has the highest kill rate of any snake in our country. And David knew this. He knows snakes really well.

He knew that he had just been bitten by a really bad snake. And even before getting to the hospital. The snake has the right to bite him because he's invading its home and stando your ground. It's walls off pretty much. Yeah. You know? By ripping that bark off.

Yeah, I did. I read one of his posts where he talked about how snakes were peaceful creatures in the Garden of Eden and they used to eat plants. And now because they're not in the garden anymore, they had to become evil or not evil creatures, but violent creatures. Wasn't the snake like the whole reason of the downfall out of the, Whatever. This Orrin guy, we're going to have to talk off. But in Garden of Eden, all the animals, they won't eat each other.

Yeah, that's true. Anyway, so it microevolved, he said, to eat animals. So even before he got to the hospital, he started going to anaphylactic shock. He was having a hard time breathing. When he got to the hospital, doctors went to work. And he ended up staying in the hospital from December 18th all the way to January 2nd. during a lot of that time he was in the ICU. And I was checking in on his stories pretty much every day.

I found out about this, like the day after he was bitten, and I was looking at his stories almost every day, and it was a wild ride. You guys remember Clara Jessup that we interviewed, she was bit by the snake in Joshua Tree? Yeah. If you guys remember, when she went to the hospital,

her pain and her swelling and everything was progressing, even though they gave her anti-venin. And I say anti-venin. Some people say anti-venin. but I pronounce an anti-venin. But anyway, they were saying, like, we might have to do a fasciotomy because your leg just isn't getting better,

which is where they make these huge cuts in you. You might not ever have the same movement or mobility again. It's a really invasive, really kind of last-ditch effort to save a leg. And if you remember, she had to kind of figure out that she needed more anti-venin. And the same thing happened with this David guy. They'd given him a ton of vials, and he still wasn't getting better, and they were saying, we're going to do a fasciotomy, whatever. And he found this expert, this guy, Dr. Ben Abbo, A-B-O, who was, like, the leading expert on envenomations by snakes, and they consulted him.

And that guy came, or I think it was over the phone mostly. He worked closely with David's doctors and told them, like, no, just give him more. Give him more crowfab, which is the type of anti-venin he was getting. and it probably saved his leg, it maybe saved his life. The crazy thing is they ended up giving him 88 vials of antivenin, which is nuts. I think it ties the all-time record. I feel like they need to start making bigger vials than anti-benin.

Just one huge one. Yeah. This episode is brought to you by Netflix. Most valuable promotions in Netflix are hosting a Blockbuster Triple Headliner Saturday, May 16th. Rhonda Rousey returns to face fellow woman's MMA pioneer Gina Carrano in the main event. Plus co-main's Nate Diaz

versus Mike Perry. And the best heavy weight in the world, Francis Ngano versus Felipe Lins. Watch Rhonda Rousey versus Gina Carano, live only on Netflix. Saturday, May 16th at 9 p.m. Eastern Center time, 6 p.m. Pacific time. So he got a ton.

It was really touch and go. Like, there was some of his stories where I'm like, this dude's going to die. He's for sure going to lose his leg. He did get discharged from the hospital finally. He's at home. He seems like he has a lot of energy, and he's really stoked to kind of get back on his feet

and do whatever he can to get better. So I do think he's probably the perfect person to have to deal with this sort of thing, like where no one should have to deal with this, but for him, I think he has the best chance of having mobility and everything again. His foot is locked in one position, and there's a chance he won't ever get that back,

which would really be terrible because you wouldn't ever really be able to walk the same again. And then there's still some thought that maybe his muscles are deteriorating in his leg from the venom that's still in there. And if that continues to happen, they still, amputation is still on the table for this kid, which is crazy.

Oh, wow. This is a snake that I think it's, I can't remember the exact statistic, but I think like one in five people would die if they didn't get treatment after getting bit by an Eastern Diamondback. And he for sure, would have. Like this snake pumped in so much venom. I have no doubt in my mind. Had he not gotten to a

hospital in time, he would have died from this snake bite. This was a pretty intense one. So I hope he gets better. Good luck, Oren. Adventurion. Maybe someday we'll do a full episode on it. I don't, he probably's not going to want to talk to me after the control. Let's have him on. He can do some real evangelizing on our podcast. Yeah, we can have half of the episode just like, what's Garda me? He didn't like, dude. Dude, I've been thinking about that since you brought it up. I think I would have ate the fruit, too. I don't hold Eve accountable in any way.

I love fruit. I'm a big fruit fan. Go for it. If God's going to put that tree in the garden, he knows what he's doing, you know? Right. All part of his plan. Yeah. If I'm in a garden for thousands of years or however they're long there, they're there,

and God's just like, hey, you guys can do whatever you want. Just don't go near this one tree and these really tasty-looking fruits. That's all I would think about ever. I know. Yeah, really start nagging at the back of your brain. I bet it was so good. Good job, Eve. Way to be brave.

Knowledge of good and evil. Man. Yeah. Imagine how good that tastes. Yeah. Yeah. Dude, that's my freaking dad you're talking about. Your dad.

Your grandpa. Ancester. I mean, that's all. Sure. I guess if you're into that, those aren't the same thing. He's all of our. Dad. All right.

I'll go. It's hard in 2024, 2025 to, like, break out as a content creator. Can you guys agree with that? Yeah, harder than ever. Sure. Back in the 1800s. You got so many people trying. You know, everyone's got a camera.

Everyone's making content. So, like, you got to push the envelope. Unfortunately, for a man in Uzbekistan, he pushed it a little bit too far, probably. He worked at a private zoo. He's a 44-year-old. He was on a night shift on December 17th. And he made a video of himself to impress his girlfriend where he walked into the lion enclosure at the zoo. Just kind of like, check this out, you know?

Right. And it's like oldest form of content creation. Just trying to impress a girl. Actually, watch the video and it's like, there's these three male lions in the the corner and he walks in there and they are watching him but not really caring. It wasn't enough for him to just go and then closure. He like needed them to start doing stuff, I guess. So he like walked up to him and then he got five feet away and this lion like shot up.

It got up so fast and it scared him really bad. And he like backtrack back to the door. And then all three lions like followed him to the door. And he's pretty much just petting him, but then was still pretty freaked out, just like kept saying one of their names like Simba, Simba, Simba, Simba, Simba. But it was a weird situation because, like, he wanted all of this to be happening, you know? Right. This is what he was, like, trying to accomplish. And then the Lions walked out of the enclosure, which he didn't want.

This is the first unplanned thing he wanted. So he went out to try to get the... lines back in the enclosure so he weren't getting trouble and that's where I mean the video stops but that's where they went into the zoo that four hours later and found his like guts and everything like spread out and the lines oh man you said that wasn't part of the plan was his girlfriend impressed I mean it does make a more interesting video if I'm being honest yeah sure it wasn't in the video yeah that's true that's like that time you jumped in the ice and I I didn't quite catch it with the camera.

And you were... It is, it is, like, sad. He lost his life, but definitely one where it's like, come on, dude. Yeah. Just leave the lions alone in the zoo where he went in. They touched them and stuff. Like, just leave it.

Yeah, they're on the short list of the animals in the zoo that I don't want to be in their enclosure. Yeah. You know? And, like, where it's a private zoo, I think they are pretty accustomed. to people, but still, and then one other little headline since I'm on the topic of zoos is just Harambe got a little bit of...

He still got shooters out there. Someone got a little bit of justice for him today, or not today, but recently. At the Cincinnati Zoo, Bonobo, so that's pretty much a chimpanzee, right, Wes? It's a close cousin to the chimpanzee, but it's not. I mean, it's its own animal. It's its own species, yeah. Okay, but like think of a chimpanzee and you're like kind of think. They look very similar to chimpanzees.

But it bit off part of one of the thumbs of one of the zookeepers at the Cincinnati Zoo that was feeding it. And I like to think, you know, it's just kind of even in the score a little. Maybe it thought it was some Reese's whipped cream because we know that chimpanzees love that. McDonald's. Chicken McNuggets. Chicken nuggets, yeah. Poor Tonka. Pokemon edition.

Do you got a story for us? I do. So this story involves a man named Carl White. He's a longtime resident of a subdivision near the Sims Bayou in Houston. And after watching some newsreels of this guy in this encounter, I decided I really want to meet him. Seems like the kind of guy that spend a, you know, every once in a while just hang out with for a half hour and it'll be the highlight of your week. So White, Carl White, and his neighbors, they say, suspect that access to Sims Bayou is what's been allowing wild hogs to wander into their

neighborhood. And we've talked a little bit about the wild hog epidemic, we could call it, especially in Texas. Like, it's a serious problem. It causes two and a half billion dollars in damages every year. I think just in Texas alone. So like it's, it's a big deal. And there's not really a great way to deal with it as far as I've seen. Is that right? Well, yeah, there's also a lot of like disease experts that think it's a huge risk for our next like really big pandemic these are these pigs that that spread disease between because they're they're an animal that can transfer diseases to humans like they're a zoonotic or whatever um it's a huge problem destruction they're terrible for native and native ecosystems and then also disease

transmission huge is a good word for it too when i first did i think it i would say it i would subscription episode a while ago and then we've covered them since and I've gone and looked on Google images at the size some of these hogs can reach. Huge hogs. You Google huge hogs. Huge hogs. The Google results were a little mixed. Got some things I didn't want to see in there. But you'll see a hog that is killed by somebody. What's up with all these animals? Yeah. I got to filter the animals. out of here real quick. But every once in a while you'll see like a dead hog that someone just loads into the back of their truck. And the truck is bottoming out on the back side because the weight and size of these hogs is just like, it's crazy. It's like horror movie type stuff. But according to Carl Carl, there's a horror movie. Razorback. So good, dude. That's a big old hog. Everybody watched that movie. But according to Carl White, they've gotten into this neighborhood that he lives in. They've killed pets. They've intimidated and confronted pedestrians and just caused untold damage to property.

So one night while he was working in his garage, his dog moose started barking and came running to the side of White's wheelchair. He's confined to a wheelchair. He has a prosthetic leg and I think he's missing the other leg entirely. Herping? But yeah, possible. Eastern Diamond back bite. Yeah. But Carl knew that this behavior from his dog meant that there was trouble coming. So he quickly grabbed a nearby airsoft gun to defend himself from whatever the approaching danger was. And he flipped on the LED light that was mounted on top of it. And I actually want to play this clip, just because I think it's going to sound much better coming from him that it could ever come from me. I was sitting right over to the spot.

And he was coming full speed looking right at me and fixing him money down. And when I hit that light, you know, it startled him. And he turned to 180 right there in front of me. so close that I can smell him. Fixing to mow him down. Fixing to mow him down so close he could smell him, which is scary, you know. That is scary. When you smell the animal, that's when you know it's real trouble. I don't know, I get that's just, I just said that. Except with skunks. Except for skunks, yeah, probably not immediate danger. Skunks, a lot of times you can smell it and you'd be like, I'm probably good still. Right. So when the animal turned around again,

white-fired pellets at it, and that finally did the trick. He's grateful that his dog worn him in time to grab the gun, but now he plans to take extra precautions and encourages other neighbors to do the same. Quote, don't get yourself in a position where you're confronting or cornering them because that's when they get really nervous and come at you. But let them have an escape

if they want to run away. And you add one other quote I want to just play real quick again. I love this guy unabashedly. Don't get yourself in a position where you're confronting or cornering them because that's when they get nervous and come at you. But now,

I'm not going to get caught slipping. Not going to get caught slipping. It's going to have wet mines all over. He has, like, his reading glasses attached to his prosthetic leg. Dude, he's got, like, pens and stuff all jay. He uses, he uses that real estate real well. But I thought that was an interesting way to wrap up his thoughts, the right and the wrong way to retaliate against an animal that's coming.

Like, you don't want to be. so scary or like so trap them so that they are cornered and feel like they need to make some kind of desperate move. So I just saw this video on YouTube. My YouTube algorithm also serves me a lot of wildlife content. And there was, it was just a short, but it was the spear fisherman who had a reef shark in front of him. And the reef shark you could tell was acting pretty aggressively. It had like arched its back and stuff. And you see him reach out and poke it with his spear beer gun just to kind of like shoe it but like that's a poke you know that's something that feels antagonistic toward an animal like a shark and it just the second he pokes it it turns and

comes and bites him on the leg and it's kind of what you're saying here that if you're if your defense is too much of an offense for that animal in its mind it's going to retaliate even harder if it is an animal that has that option and so you do have to be careful you don't want to corner them you don't want to trigger them to come back even even harder. Glad Carl made it out of the situation all right. If you're listening, Carl, let's have lunch. You got to keep that thing on you, that airsoft gun. Yeah.

To shoot him. All right. And I got to clear my Google search results history. Got a lot of answering to do there. I got a story about that. John Travolta and stuff and the wildhogs. You got a story about. clearing Google search history?

Yeah. Let's hear it. It's just a quick one. It's, I don't know, it's not as funny as that sounds, but there's a funny part to it. Like one of your stories for today? Yeah. Oh, all right. A Texas teen is accused, but like pretty much she's guilty.

She killed a classmate's show goat for like fairs and stuff. So there's like, at first she was like, I didn't do it. And then she eventually, they had like video of her putting a syringe in the goat's mouth three different times and stuff. And she's like, well, I don't like cheaters. And this girl is a cheater. And they're like, well, I think killing a goat. Yeah, what's a bigger cheat? And like killing someone's animal.

And it never said like what she accuses this other person of cheating. but she did, she got arrested, she got out on $5,000 bail. She denied it, but then she said, like, yeah, I did do it. And then the investigation afterwards was able to, like, get access to go search her house. And they looked on her computer and her Google search was, how much bleach can kill an animal. If goats get injected with bleach, do they die? Poisoning pets, what should I know?

And then the last one was how to clear search. history. No. So yeah, she's pretty busted. Oh, that's so funny. But yeah, poor goat, you know, these people who act like they, like the show animal people who are just obsessed with the animals,

it's like sometimes they're just psycho about it. And actually, I think like Tanya with the chimpanzees maybe had a bit of this where it's like what they really care about is. the attention they're getting from the animals more so than the animals, you know? Yeah, right. So if she had a little robot and the police came to her house, the robot would be like, Hey, are you still wondering how to kill your goat or something like that? It's not an internet robot.

It's like a dance. It's just a dancing robot. All right. You can fish. You can't play with it. I watched a bunch of videos to decide whether or not to keep it. I did. Well, I got a story about a bear.

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Ooh, I love polar bears. There's not, yeah, there's not many of these. So they're always interesting when they happen. These are kind of the only bear attack stories we get in America for the winter, huh? Uh, yeah, every once in a while there's something weird that happens. I guess black bears in the south, maybe. In like Florida and stuff. Yeah.

All right. So in Fort Severn, which. is a First Nation community, about 400 people in the far north of Ontario. There was an unnamed man, an unnamed woman. They left their house around 5 o'clock a.m. to go find their dogs. So they just don't have birth certificates? They just didn't want to be named, I think. Sometimes parents wait a while to name their kids, like even after they're born.

Maybe this is just like an extreme example. It could be. I don't think that's what it was, though. But this happened in early December. I think it was December 3rd. They left their house. I think they had lost their dogs, their dogs weren't around for whatever reason.

It didn't give the details, but they were trying to find their dogs when a polar bear was actually in the driveway of their home. And as they came out of their home, the polar bear lunged at the woman, and she slipped to the ground as this bear lunged toward her, and the bear was about to grab her when the husband leapt onto the polar bear's back

to stop it from attacking his life. The polar bear then did switch its focus towards this man. It bit him. It attacked his arms and his legs, causing serious but not life-threatening injuries to this man. It probably would have killed him had a neighbor not arrived with the gun and shot the bear several times.

The bear retreated into the woods where it died of its injuries. This man was taken to a community nursing station and he was treated for his injuries. They couldn't have been too bad because I don't think they ended up taking them to like a major hospital. But I know I worked a bit with Polar Bears International and they were all over this story

talking about how rare these things actually are and they are very rare. Polar bears do enter communities from time to time, but usually they just kind of are looking for maybe some discarded food or whatever else they might be able to eat. They rarely attack people. When they do, really all you can do is fight back. This isn't one where you ever want to play dead. You need to use a deterrent if you have it. And then if you don't have one, you just have to try and fight back.

This is part of why I hate that poem that's so popular. The masturbation one from Oren. Yeah, that one. I hate that poem. Just let me masturbate. No, the one, if it's black, fight back, if it's brown, laid down. If it's white, good night. We've talked about this before.

on the podcast. It's a bad poem because it starts off great. Like with a black bear, you should almost always fight back if a black bear's attacking you. If a brown bear's attacking you, it's much more nuanced. You only lay down if you don't have a deterrent and you've exhausted all your options. But then this polar bear segment of like, if it's white, good night, which pretty much means you have no recourse.

If a polar bear attacks you, you're just going to die. That's not true. Bear spray works great on these animals. flares work really well on them. There's a lot of things that can really discourage a polar bear from attacking a person. Guns, yeah. Honestly, like guns, this is probably the best bear to have a gun for it because they don't often come in really fast. They approach at a good clip, but just kind of like a direct approach.

And you often don't have a lot of stuff in between you and the bear. There aren't usually like a lot of trees and stuff where these animals live. But so if the neighbor hadn't come out with the gun, would playing dead work with polar bear at all? They don't care about it. Like, they don't lose interest until you're dead. They don't attack territorially. They don't attack to neutralize a threat.

Like, if they're attacking, they'll probably kill you. They're almost certainly trying to eat you. Almost certainly. Like, sure, there are every once in a fluke surprise polar bear attack where they're not trying to eat the person, but almost always that is their end goal, and they're very opportunistic. So I think even if it was, say,

this crazy defensive attack that a polar bear decided to do, if it suddenly had you on the ground in front of it, there's a good chance that it's going to say, you know what, I am going to eat this. I know that you hate the poem and you're not going to want to give it any credit. If you're butt naked, that poem kind of works. Like if you don't have any deterrence

There's no people around No because you would still want to fight back And there's still a chance Yeah there's still a chance that you could convince it to stop It's not likely but it's possible And it has happened Where people have put up enough of a fight Where the polar bear just decides it's not worth it

This story is kind of like the childhood fantasy Or just like masculine fantasy That guys get sometimes Like I'm going to save a woman by fighting off a bear. Bare-handed. Like, it worked. It's pretty sick.

I'm kind of jealous of this guy. Maybe he's set this up, and his neighbor just didn't show up quite in time. That's a wrinkle. Yeah. No, honestly, in a way, their safety stuff is really close to a black bear. Like, you kind of treat them the same way as a black bear. It's just that if it does decide to attack you, it's a much worse situation than you would be in with a black bear. It's a much bigger animal.

So, anyway, really interesting story. I hope he heals well. I hope he's okay. Yeah. Yeah, this is a true hero. I mean, that takes a lot of guts to jump on an animal that big and dangerous to save someone. This guy loves his life. Yeah.

When he dies, he'll be in the tomb of the unknown soldier or whatever. No one knows his name still. But he did something so rogue. We're going to need to memorialize him somehow. Yeah, that's how you know this guy's a true hero, too, is he didn't give his name to the news. Oh, yeah. Yeah. It's so cool.

The neighbors. Probably kind of pissed though, like, dude, you could have like made me look so cool. Right. Hey, Wes. Yeah. Siamese crocodiles are critically endangered animal, right? Correct. Yes.

How do you feel if I told you someone in September killed 125 of them? I wouldn't be happy about it. But are they farmed? Well. Or are they wild ones? Yeah, you figured that out. Okay. September 27th.

A Thai crocodile farmer But that goes by the name of Crocodile X Had to kill 125 of these endangered animals I don't know Crocodile Farm

I think he was making his living from it Maybe trying to marry that one lady Lina Delo Who's the like actress who just married an alligator? Yeah Lana Del Rey Married an alligator You know she got married so then he was just like I guess I'll kill him all

No, not really. What happened is he had this crocodile farm for 17 years. He loved his crocodiles as like, you know, most important thing in the world to him. But Thailand got hit with Asia's most powerful storm this year is Typhoon Yagi. And it really hit them hard. So one of the walls of his enclosure was like breaking down completely. The whole town was like, getting hammered by rain and floods,

and people were like already not doing well. Nine people were killed, and his wall collapsed, and these crocodiles were going to have a straight access into the town nearby. 125 crocodiles just like entering your flooded town. Yeah, that's like that's, I mean, that's it. That's trouble.

So he made the hardest decision he ever had to make in his life, and he had to kill all of his crocodiles. Really sad story. We all dreaded. Could have been like a real crazy tooth and claw story had he not killed him, though. Maybe next time just let him do their thing. Yeah. But yeah, that's my story.

That is really sad. Yeah. So I'm curious if his crocodile farm, though, was he farming them for meat? Do you know? I think it was like a tourist thing. A tourist attraction. I don't know, for sure. Yeah.

I know that his desert. having crocodiles anymore, though. He's out of crock. He's pretty sad. Yeah. I don't think you farm Siamese crocodiles for meat, right? I don't know. Like endangered animals?

Can you farm endangered animals? Probably if you're like breeding them in captivity and not letting them. Yeah, I think you probably. You should let them go. That would have helped like the population. Yeah. Yeah. I think so.

Well, I have, are you done? Jeff, I don't want to cut you off. I have two more, but I think I'll save them for the end. Okay, but speaking of tourist attractions, I have a story from Thailand out of Thailand. This happened at the Kow Yao Center in southern Thailand at a place that offers elephant care packages that let tourists, they can make food and feed the elephants when they go there, take them out for walks, just like interact with elephants in a way that isn't recommended nor ethical, probably. And I remember when I was in, I was in Thailand when I was like a year. young teenager. And even back then, without really knowing very much about the ethics of animal enclosures and all that, I saw a bunch of elephants when I was there, and it was just really

depressing, you know? Just even the slightest, quickest glance at a distance told me that, like, some pretty bad stuff was going on. But I think a good rule of thumb for people out there that, like, want to do this sort of thing when they're on vacation is if the animals are restrained, like if they're in like chains or something like if you go to a tiger place or an elephant place or something and they're all chained up that's never a good sign and then if you are allowed to approach the animal and touch the animal that's also not good like if you are just put it in a location like you guys went to one in Zimbabwe that I thought was great where the elephants were kind of free roving and then yeah they actually like came up to you that's okay like that's that animal and they could leave if they wanted to free will yeah yeah yeah And I've been to one in India where the rescue animals are, you know, there's this kind of same thing where if they were able to come close to you, that's okay. But if you're, if they're like chained up and you get to walk up to it and touch it or whatever, it's not good. I can just like pretty much blanket statement say that's not good for the animal. Especially elephants, sometimes they have those really gnarly ankle chains with like spikes and stuff on the inner ring.

So it's just like, it's. like it's basically pain that's controlling these elephants. I'm not saying that's what's happening at this Kow Yao Center. This actually seems like, well, I don't want to say anything about it. But I will say it. One of the popular tourist activities that they offered to people that came was to shower and scrub the elephants with mud, which 22-year-old Blanca Ojongeren Garcia was helping to do when a 50-year-old named Fong Samboon, she was a big female elephant,

decided that she had enough of interacting with tourists for the day. Garcia, Blanca Garcia's boyfriend and 10 other workers were nearby. Fortunately, they were uninjured during this encounter, but the elephant did turn violent. And initially, they thought that Garcia had gotten gored by the elephant's tusk. And this is kind of the scary part to me, but what actually had happened was the elephant just kind of quickly brushed her aside with her trunk, just like, get off me, move away. It wasn't like a huge violent gesture or anything. it flicked her away with its tusk and she got sent tumbling

and somewhere along the way she hit her head somewhere like on a wall or on the ground on a rock. I'm not sure exactly but her condition was serious enough that they rushed her to the hospital and she quickly succumbed to her injuries and died pretty shortly after arriving.

And that's just like crazy to me that it's still standard practice that people can get so close to an animal that can just flick its trunk or flick its trunk and kill you, you know? Accidentally, of course. Or maybe not, maybe this elephant really didn't tend to do some damage. It's crazy.

The elephant was probably just moving her out of the way and, like, has no idea it killed her. Right. Yeah, it's like when you bench less than 200 pounds, it's like, this is nothing. You're just throwing it around the gym, right? Yeah, I do. I don't, I haven't killed anyone with that. Sure, but you could. that I know of, I guess.

Maybe I've like, push someone out of my way and they'd kill them. And I just didn't realize. There's videos out there that you can see of, like, circus elephants that escape. And we've talked about them a bit. I think we talked about, Jeff talked about Tyke. There's been some other ones that we brought up. When those elephants decide that they've had enough, there's very little that people can do to stop them. Like, they can really just kind of get through any barrier, do whatever they want, until they

were like got brought down with force. And yeah, I totally agree with you, Mike. It's kind of crazy that we're allowed to interact with an animal like that. That it's so powerful. It can kill you literally with its trunk. We also know just how emotionally complex elephants are. And it made me think of even when I go to good establishments like the Hogle Zoo, I'm not saying they're wrong in how they do their elephant stuff.

But like, they did get rid of that recently, right? They got their elephants taken away. A closure wasn't big enough, right? Yeah, it just made me think of artilicum story, the orca, that these animals are just too big and emotionally complex to be kept in those kinds of corridors. And they just literally can go insane because they have no real source of enrichment that could ever meet their needs in those kinds of situations. So it's just really sad to me to think about.

I know we're really pro zoo. And I do think AZA zoos do a really good job to take care of all of their insubes. animals. But if there was one animal that I would really say we probably shouldn't have in zoos, it would probably be elephants. You know, I'm not counting orcas in aquariums, but I mean like land animal. I really think elephants are just too big and too complex of an animal to keep in captivity. But I don't know nearly as much about them as an elephant zoo handler does. So I'm not going to, you know, I'm sure there's arguments for having them in zoos too. You think you should just let them out. Just let them go. Yeah.

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Should we do it? Let's go. This one happened in Japan. And I really like bear stories that happen in Japan because they always have very creative kind of solutions and ways that they deal with them. And this is something that's happening more and more. Japan has a really a growing number of Asiatic black bears. Hokkaido has a lot of brown bears.

They have a subspecies of a brown bear that live there. They have actually quite a few bears. And these Asiatic black bears tend to be a bit more onry than our black bears. They can be kind of an aggressive animal. We haven't done a full episode on them yet. But they definitely are on our roster. We will do that. I did a subscription episode and they're using robo wolves to scare them off.

That's why you should keep your robot, Wes. Come on, dude. That's true. I do need it for bear for bear safety. Yes, it's really fascinating, but this bear actually wandered into a store in Akita City. This was at the end of November, November 30th, and it attacked a 47-year-old employee who sustained a minor head injury. So I was reading through this story, and it was like then talking about the response to this bear and how it took authorities a couple of days to get it. And in my mind, I'm thinking like, oh, so it went in the store, attacked this guy, left the store,

and went out in the woods and it took them a while to find it. Like that's kind of where your mind would go. It's not what happened here. It took them two days to get this bear that was still in the store. It never left the store for these two days, which is crazy to me.

During that time, it ransacked the meat section, it damaged a bunch of shelves, it destroyed this store. Two days of a bear. That's like Mr. Beast. video I bought this grocery store and put a bear in there to see you have to you have to stay yes right can you imagine though if there was a Disneyland for bears it'd be like the deli section and a grocery store oh yeah just go wild there's the photo that I saw with this

article there's 12 police officers like decked out in swakier and they're all holding riot shields entering this store and like that was their plan wow it's just to go in there and try and get this bear with riot shields and like batons, I think. So it stayed in that. I think it's sad if it didn't find the honey because it's in like plastic bottles so you can't tell. Oh, that's true. Yeah, that's true. It's in the store for two days.

They sent a drone in to try and find it first. Try and find it. How big is the store? It's not that big. Like it's a grocery store, like a supermarket. But I looked at photos and it's not. like our supermarkets that are just expansive. I don't know, a pretty normal-sized supermarket.

So then the police put on protective gear, like riot gear. They went in the supermarket in an entrance covered by a piece of plastic. They found it in the storage area. So they set up a trap, like a box trap, similar probably to the traps that me and Jeff used to trap bears. They baited it with honey and apples, and the bear was caught a couple days later. Or sorry, it was caught the next day. it would be hard like a bear that has that much human food that it has access to it'd be really hard to entice it into a trap so i am impressed that they actually were able to catch this bear especially just honeies and apples it's just yeah you got so much food around you like why are you going in this really small space right right so somehow they'd manage to do it though and then they put the bear down because it had attacked this guy and obviously yeah i do think like this is an interesting response to this.

And I know our culture has like a gun issue. But I do think if you were to say, if this were to happen in Missoula and they were like, oh, let's send in a drone. Let's send in a riot team, whatever. I would just say, send in like one bear expert with a 12 gauge and some slugs. And this will be over in 10 minutes, you know? And that is like where they knew they were going to kill this bear,

I don't really understand why they didn't just go in and shoot it. Like they still killed them. that's crazy yeah yeah so it seems like a lot of effort to like trap and then kill the bear

but um and I think the guy got out the guy that got mauled I don't think he was like stuck in there with the bear for these two days if he was we need to interview that guy for our podcast

but it was such this was a wild ride from you because when I read it I was like oh a bear hurt someone in a store and then laughed and then when I realized like no no it was in there that whole time. It's so crazy.

So, yeah, crazy story. I love. You know that, like, supermarkets got, like, bears all over it now for, like, because, like, Japan loves mascots. Yeah. It's just got, like,

so many bear mascots now. No, in Missoula, yeah, that would be solved so fast. Well, like, there's that one, there was a buck at the golf course by our mom and dad's house that was, like, going up to golfers and like nudging them with its head and stuff and so then the golf course eventually

after like two days of it called the fish wildlife and parks and they came and they're like this is the buck doing it and it like walked right up to the guy and they like yeah look at it and the guy just like pulled out his gun and shot it without even like warning anyone just threw it in the truck Yeah, it wouldn't have lasted long here. But it was interesting. The picture of them going in their riot gear, it's got to be wondering what's going on in those guys' heads. That's amazing. I love it.

I have two, just of two different five-year-olds in big U.S. cities. One's a coyotes be wilding, and another one's a mountain lion. Don't tease us. Tell us, dude. What's a five-year-old? Is the Jerry McGuire kid? he's probably about five years old, right? Sure.

So just think of that kid. Maybe it's a little too young. I love that your references from a movie, 1996. 30 years old. I think I mentioned this the other day, but L.A. is actually a pretty unique big city because it's one of the only big cities in the world that has big cats, and those are mountain lions that live in the city.

Yeah. The other one is in, There's like a couple Yeah, Mumbai, India Uh-huh Are like the two that are like I think Nairobi kind of has lions We were in Nairobi and there's lions right by it

But they don't I mean like LA and Mumbai They actually go into the city You know Yeah, they live in the city limits They'll go in and get prey Yeah So in L.A

Normally you don't hear too much about Mount Lions really Doing anything like people will see them, but they don't really go after people is what I'm trying to say. But on Labor Day weekend, they were out at a park. Yeah, it's a little bit. They're at a park in Malibu, and a five-year-old boy got attacked by a mountain line, and it just pretty much just came out of the bushes, grabbed him with his mouth,

and was trying to pull him back into the bushes. So it was really quick, and the family got up right away. way were able to scare the cat off but then the cat like stayed there and just stared at him which is kind of scary and they were able to like get the boy he had some pretty good injuries but nothing life-threatening yeah i just thought like you don't hear that from l.a too much but honestly for me kind of makes me like want to live in l.a. more than i would otherwise like them having mountain lions that live in the town that would make me want to live there more than if they didn't is what

I'm saying. Yeah, right. And then there's another similar story just like 10 minutes outside of Seattle. A coyote went and grabbed a five-year-old boy and was like bringing them into the bushes and then. Not the same five-year-old? It could have been. They're both unnamed. Very lucky five-year-old.

Just give your kids names. It's not that hard. The mountain lion one, I do remember that one. And from what I remember it, and I'm going to look it up really quick, it was like in a state park in like Malibu. It was Malibu Creek State Park. Okay, yeah. So it wasn't like in the city. Right.

They were like up in the hills above Malibu where there are like a number of mountain lions. This isn't a place that you would not expect a mountain lion to be. When is Labor Day? Liberty's in September, early September. Okay, that one's not too far back then. It's like three news episodes back, but that's okay. September? Yeah, two?

I had two, the crock one was September, too. All right, yeah, that's fine. I think that's, marked by the beat of your own drum. Sure, it's all right. September is not too bad. Look, all those animals are sleeping that I want to talk about. All right. Mountain lions aren't, coyotes aren't.

Coyotes, yeah. So, yeah, that one happened. The coyote got him on New Year's Eve. It was pulling him into those bushes. So, you know, Cahos B. Wiling, you got to keep your head on a swivel, especially our five-year-old listeners. Because, like, an adult coyotes won't really go after you. But if you're five years old listening to me right now, like, keep your head on a swivel. There might be around you right now.

Keep that airsoft gun on you. Especially around New Year's, because you know, there's not a coyote out there that's going to have a New Year's resolution to while less. They're going to be wanting to while more. It's like people go to the gym a lot more in January. It's probably a coyotes are thinking. But no, because it was New Year's Eve.

So it hadn't quite, maybe it was last year's resolution to, like, attack at least one boy. And it hadn't done it yet. Procrastinated. Well, that reminded me of something. I think we need to do a little correction corner. A lot of people wrote in about your tourniquet thing in the Tiger Shark episode. They're just like, don't loosen it.

Don't do that. It can let in toxin blood that's like on the part below the tourniquet, and it's just a bad idea to loosen the tourniquet to let out of blood. Keep it tight. Tight, tight, tight, tight. We might even just go back and cut that out because we don't want to give anyone bad medical advice. You didn't say that like it was good, though. You just thought it was an interesting consideration.

Yeah, people have been too hard on you too. It's all right. You know, we put out a lot of information. Every once in a while we're going to get something a little bit wrong. We don't have a fact checker here. No, we do. I'm Jeff's fact checker a lot. But Tiger Sharks.

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epglysis. Don't use if you're allergic to Epglyss. Allergic reactions can occur that can be severe. Eye problems can occur. Tell your doctor if you have new or worsening eye problems. You should not receive a live vaccine when treated with Epglis. Before starting Epgless, tell your doctor if you have a parasitic infection. Ask your doctor about ebbglis and visit ebbglis.lis.lid.com or call 1800 LilyRX or 100 545-975-9. I don't think I gave West Mike a very good description of what I was thinking on these categories, but I was going for more of like a literature-based themed one this time.

So first is craziest news story from literature. Yeah, we should define literature here, I think. I want to keep it a little bit open to like comic and stuff like that. So that, yeah, typically literature is defined by, it's like the canon, higher elevated art is pages doesn't mean literature. Like speculative fiction or novels is not necessarily literature. What I was going for is just we do movies and TV a lot and I want to go like something we read. Yeah, like the written word or the, yeah. Yeah, got it.

Okay, in books. And yeah, we'll count. I can start with this one. So to me, like, if I was in the world of books that I've read, the craziest new story I would have ever read would be that all the dementers escaped from Alcaband. Ascaband, yeah. Yeah. It'd be like, holy shit. All the dementers, I thought that place, there's, like, no way they could escape.

They're all out. That's insane. Those things suck your soul. out. That's a good one. Like the worst possible thing that can happen to you. Yeah. Yeah.

And they don't really serve any master. Also on that same thing, Harry Potter theme as a backup ahead, Voldemort killed by a baby. Like if you were just waiting for Voldemort to come kill you. Yeah. And then in the news, you're just like, Voldemort killed by a baby. That would be like a pretty crazy news. It would be. Endline to read it.

Upset. Yeah. I picked, so I was kind of thinking along the same lines of like something that happened in a movie that would be a crazy news headline or in a book, sorry, to have like delivered to you. And I thought of Ender's game. And if you don't know the plot of Ender's game, it's like this kid who's kind of a military savant. Mike's favorite book. Yeah, he's forced, well, it's one of them, right? It was a one college you claim that.

That would have been a weird one. play this kind of like virtual reality simulation and he's so good at it that these military leaders are starting to have like a really market interest in him because they're fighting this galactic war with these kind of race of giant ants and at the end ender is forced to do this crazy thing where he actually destroys the planet of these ants and in the process wipes out like their entire galactic fleet like his fleet and a bunch of his friends. and everything. And he's thinking that he's playing this game when really he was actually controlling the military

apparatus and he actually did a genocide. Zenocide. And killed a bunch of people too. And to me, that would be the craziest thing if you're Ender to see the news like war over hero boy blows up alien planet. Yeah, that was kind of what I was thinking would be. That is a bit of a shock. crazy one. So I'm going to go with the opening chapter of World War Z. I don't know if you guys

have read the book. It's an awesome book. I actually kind of like the movie quite a bit too, but the book is awesome. Just the first outbreak that happens, it's all loaded with foreboding and suspense. You know that like there's nothing is going to stop this from happening and you're about to witness the downfall of the entire civilized world. That is great. That book, especially audiobook form is amazing. There's like a varied cast of voice actors. that are all doing different parts. I highly recommend it. But that's one story, news story that I think you wake up and a zombie apocalypse is actually

happening. I think we've gotten so saturated in that market that it kind of stopped really like clicking in our brain how crazy that would be. And that's one that still feels like kind of plausible as like a zombie apocalypse, you know? Yeah, just a crazy big epidemic kind of thing. You guys remember? I've only heard about it from my parents, really, but there's a news station that decided to read War of the Worlds on, like, broadcasts.

And, like, a few people just, like, freaked out because they thought it was all true. And, like, people, like, killed themselves. Yeah, Orson Wells read it. It was, like, a big mass spread hysteria. Yeah, it was his book, and he read it. Yeah, he read the story. And is it a book? or just a story, like, that he wrote.

I'm not sure if it was his creation, but he was the one that right. Yeah. Tuning in and being like, wait, what? Yeah. That's great.

I think that's fun. That's just like something that could never happen again. All right. Yeah. So this is the one that I did a real bad job giving you guys what I meant. But Animal Attack News headline from a book

is what I told you. So what I was thinking is like, think of a book. where there's an animal attack and make the news headline. But if you interpreted it different, that's fine too. I interpreted it animal attack news headline from a book. And so, which it was written as. So I went and like Googled for a long time trying to find one and was like,

this is a very niche, hard thing to find. And I think I did an okay job. Oh, wow. The news headline isn't actually in the story, but it kind of is written like one. and it's James and the Giant Peach. And on the first page, his parents are attacked and eaten by an escaped hungry rhinoceros. And I thought that would be, A, it's close to a news headline, and B, if there was an actual headline, it would read, like, you know, English couple eaten by rhinoceros. That's something we would cover for sure.

Yeah. Oh, that'd be insane that it eats them. I'm impressed you found something. I struck out. I looked for quite a while last night. I can't find anything. I came up for one this morning. Yeah, so my attack, in quotes, and my animal, I guess, too.

It's a little unconventional, but I want Twilight at the end of the saga, when Jacob. So my headline is, local werewolf imprints on baby. Other inmates' fists imprint onto werewolf's face. So werewolf, not a real animal. Maybe. Beast of Jevodon. Who knows? But that's all, that's what I could come up with last second when we were preparing right before we started recording.

I like it. I like it. Yeah, I guess I... You don't have one? Well, I guess I didn't really write mine like a headline. I just have the stories that I would make into a headline. All right. Let's go.

like do it. So one of them is from keeping the Harry Potter theme in the first Harry Potter where Dudley falls into the boa constrictor cage and then the boa constrictor gets out and then he's just stuck in the cage. Like that would be a crazy next morning I read that in the newspaper. Boy and boa constrictor switch places. Yeah, like boy trapped in Boa Constrictor with no entrance and Boa constrictor. Constrictor gets out, glass is unbroken.

I'd be like, wait a second. You know, I also had for Game of Thrones, is Dragon Warfare unethical? That's a good one. Okay, favorite system of news in literature. I'm going to go. Oh, yeah, go ahead. No, I want to hear you explain,

because that might change what I'm going to say. What made me think of this question. Go ahead. Yeah. I'm going to guess yours is Hunger Games and the way they announced the dead people. Oh, that is pretty good. I thought about staying Harry Potter theme the whole time, too. But I went with me and Mike's favorite show, One Piece.

And I just like how birds deliver the news. And then, like, a lot of times it's like a wanted poster. But also just, like, so much stuff in that world. happens between like their news cycles. Like reading the news would just be the most exciting thing in the world. It's like they get the news like three times a year or something and just like warlords are defeated like the government's completely changed and it's just like everyone learning that at the same time would be so exciting.

I kind of wish that's how we got our news twice a year. That's what I'm saying. That's my favorite system of news. It's like, they just get like one huge burst of news every like couple months. I'm going to pick the one I thought you were going to say, which is like in Hunger Games, when someone dies, there's like a cannon and their face appears in the sky. It's an interesting way to learn that. I like in the show on Netflix, I think you should leave. the baby of the year

skit that they do they're like doing it in memoriam and it'll be like this 80 year old woman throat slashed I liked how they like included

how they died in all of them I'm gonna go I think with they're called the clacks it's these towers that are built for communication purposes in the disc world books I don't know if you guys have ever read anything by Terry Pratchett

really fun funny inventive author. But it just plays a really funny role in a couple of the books, especially going postal, where these towers are kind of taking over the responsibilities of like this small, like news delivery team, postal service team. I just think it makes for some fun conflict. Not the most imaginative thing he ever came up with, but still made for some good conflict. I like whenever they use like the tubes that they use at banks to like,

I love those tubes. Sand envelopes. Yeah. Paddington. Paddington has some great tubes. All right. So last question in category. What's the last time you read a physical newspaper and how much did you read?

My last one was our parents, they subscribed to the Missouian for a really long time. And that's the local newspaper here in Missoula. And they canceled their subscription probably like a year ago. And their last issue was probably the last issue. read because I used to go over there and read it. Oh, they don't get it anymore? No, they're done with it. Yeah.

So that's, that's my answer too, actually, because me and Cindy would do Sudoku together sometimes. That's the extent of my engagement with newspapers. I can't remember the last time I read like an actual article from a newspaper. That's really funny. It's my answer too. It's just our parents' house. It's kind of sad because I remember especially the Sunday edition, I get so excited.

to have like the funny pages that we're all in color. Oh, yeah. And like read the new Cowanin'Hobbs and all of that. It is like kind of sucks just. I mean, it's so much more efficient to get your news just on Reddit or wherever on the internet. But it does like really sap a lot of that, like charm away from just waking up and seeing what happened the last day, you know? Yeah. I just want to see old people with slippers on in a pipe reading a newspaper.

Yeah. I don't like that that's dying. Maybe this is naive, but when it came in a newspaper, I felt like a lot of eyes had to see a story for it to be published. So it felt like there was probably at least a bit of truth finding and fact checking behind it. But when it is just something on, like, Jeff, you just brought up Reddit or Twitter or wherever, you never really know if it's just one person just posted something. or if you're getting it from a good source.

I know we've talked about this a lot, but I don't know. There's something nice about that kind of... Do you know what's a crazy trend that's happening now is people making YouTube shorts and like TikTok reels and stuff or whatever, Instagram Reels, TikTok videos, where they basically just tell the AI to create visuals and a script for like a true crime incident.

Jesus. And it's just not real. Like, no part of it is real. And people are, like, ingesting this as if it were news. With animals, too, and it's really. Shark attacks that are just so stupid. It's crazy. There's that.

Dangerous, really. Like, raised a moose or something. Yeah. Well, some of those, they'll, like, piece together actual footage of animals. And then they, like, create a fake story behind it. The polar bear one. Where there's, like, a black, there's, like, a white black bear that they kept. saying was a polar bear and like moving it and it's just like so dumb happened and it'll be like

wildlife conservation specialists wanted to move it back to the arctic and it's like oh this is the dumbest thing i don't know anyway i do want to say too just like our hearts go out to anyone in the la area with the fires going on right now yeah but like i was thinking about those fires and it's like i think that's why it is the way it is and it'll stay that way is is like you're like you're You can go on, like, Twitter or whatever and see, I mean, X the everything app. Everything's on X. Just get on there and access GROC. You can, like, see the fire burning homes.

You can, like, see how widespread it's gotten. You can, like, have live updates as you're on your phone, which you have with you all the time. And to just, like, read it the next day and, like, learn about it in the newspaper would, I don't know, you'd just be way behind. you wouldn't even have as much information type of thing. Yeah, but I get for them it's really important, but like do we all need to have access to all of the world's information at all times? I don't know. Anyway.

I'm just saying that's why it's going to stay. It's like you can actually like. Yeah. For sure. Like it is more efficient to get the news. Yeah. I was laughing. I was just thinking of a Norm MacDonald bit.

I wasn't laughing about houses burning down. I just wanted to clarify. But he was just like, I was little we had a half hour of news because that's really about all the news that there is and elk maybe attacked a woman one day and that's about it locally that you'll need to know about this is really funny like 10 minute joke that he told you actually kind of got into how news changed too it did i don't know you did i kind of like anchorman too almost more than anchorman i didn't hate it okay so should we do a few listener questions all right this one's from gabe Gabe Gabe says

I love fishing. I know Jeff and West do too. So where's the most beautiful spot you've fished? And then for Mike, what anime would you recommend to someone who's not sure where to start? My most beautiful spot I've fished. I really, really like this spot that me and Jeff found on the North Fork of the Blackfoot in Montana. Every time I go there, there's nothing like that crazy beautiful about it, but it's just like a kind of perfect mix of everything I love about Montana there. So that's probably mine. What was the question? Our favorite place to fish? Your most beautiful spot you've ever fished.

Oh, most beautiful. Glacier is pretty. Yeah, that's a really good one. We should bleep that name just so we don't put it out there. But yeah, that's a good thing. The old Cindy special. A lake and glacier that we really love. I'll just say it different.

I mean, there's just a lot of fish in glacier and anywhere you fish in glacier. It's beautiful. So I'm not going to give you my exact spot. somewhat in glacial. Mike, what's a good of anime to introduce someone to the world of anime? Yeah, I always like getting this question, but it's tough because there's just, it's such a broad spectrum. It's like saying what movie would you tell someone to start with?

And it's like, well, what are you into? Do you like romance? Do you like action? What are you into? But I mean, the classic is full metal alchemist brotherhood. That's just like your standard, extremely solid, fun characters, some cool. fights, good action. If you're into sports, I would go maybe

high cue or slam dunk. That's volleyball, basketball, respective. If you're into romance, maybe check out Kimini Todoke. That's just a really cute, kind of fun, high school, two awkward teens trying to get together. I don't know. I just, I would talk about this

all day with somebody who's like really interested, but I can tell 90% of our audience is like, uh, uh, yeah. So Gabe, I guess you got to get a little more interested to get Mike's attention. So yeah, that's your answer. All right, this one's from Abby. Abby says, which type of vampire would you like to be? Sparkly Twilight, interview with a vampire,

Nosferatu, Dracula, etc. I think I'd want to be the sparkly one from I think I would too. Just because like they still have all the cool things about being a vampire. They're like super strong and immortal and everything, but they can go out at like during the day and they can be somewhat normal living things. Right. I think the downsides to all the other ones are too great. I think I'll Zach. I think I'll go with Nosferatu.

Me and Wes just saw the new one. I like the Dracula. West didn't love the mustache. The mustache threw me off. Uh, but. Historically accurate. You know,

I guess does. I know. I liked it quite a bit. And I would want to be that one because I just think, like, if you got to live thousands of years, like trying to be just like going to school and like being just like a normal person would be insanity for a thousand years. Yeah, it's dumb to true.

That's he kept going to school. I'd want to like live in my own place by myself, just sleep all the time and maybe once I get extremely bored, go into town and try to fuck shit up. Okay. That's what it does. Mike? I think I'll sparkle. I was thinking trying to make a case for interview with a vampire, but it just seems like they're all

super unhappy. I just not having a great time. But you get to hang out with Brad Pitt or Tom Cruise. I do that. Tom Cruise is so fun. Have you guys seen the series, the interview with the vampire series? No, I haven't. It's pretty good.

I liked it quite a bit. I like the books a lot. The first few at least. I think they're really good. Abby also asked this for you, Mike. If you've read the storm, well, she, Abby said, if you guys have read the Stormlight Archive series, which I know Mike has,

which creature from the series is your favorite? Oh man. I just, it's a tough one to say the spren, just because that encompasses so much. But I just like the idea of like living little mystical spiritual beings, embodying like basically every element on Earth. But I really love in the first one, the big chasm crawler crabs that have the big gems in their,

like their carapace. I think it's on their, mounted on their heads. But it just makes for some really, really fun set pieces. and fights with their big glowy lightsaber swords trying to hack off this big old gems down. Dude, those books are sweet. You guys got to...

I honestly, I do want to read them. Yeah, but I think I went around in the wrong way because I tried an audio book. And I think with that one, it's too dense for an audiobook. I need to be able to like reference what I just read and stuff. The prologue and opening chapter

is pretty discombobulating too. Once you get through that, it gets pretty streamlined. Yeah. That really crossed me up to like start. When I like start out and I have no clue what's going on, I get real crossed up. This one's from Deborah. Deborah says when I was about four years old, I was totally in love with Bugs Bunny and told everyone who'd listen that I'd marry him someday.

What cartoon character would you consider dating or bringing home to mom? Lo, but. Oh, I want to go home to mom. That's a good thing. just bringing her home I mean like Jessica Rabbit Jessica Rabbit That's the one

Tough to bring home But Bugs Bunny Sometimes could be like a pretty sexy lady When he checks up Elmer Fudd Yeah Writing on that huge cow

What's her The one The really old one That was like the pinup girl Oh Betty Boop? Why can't I think? Yeah Betty Boop Sure

She looks like one of those funco pops Like the weird like rectangle head She's cute though It Jessica Rabbit's my answer Like that was the first like feelings I had for a cartoon Is Jessica Rabbit same Crazy cartoon is Johnny Bravo Just like a cartoon for kids about some guy

Hitting on like women Yeah That's all it was There's like no like But I think I think the message was like, he struck out every time, though. I think the message was like, don't be like this guy. He's a, he's a, he's a, he's a weirdo and a creep and he sucks.

John Arbuckle in Garfield always had like really hot women around him too, which was a little weird to me. True. And I would read those. All right. I think that's good. Yeah. Thanks patrons for sending questions. I got a couple from Instagram, just like two maybe.

Janet O303. if you could move one of your eyes, where would you put it? So, like, if it's, like, spying on something. I'd put it, I'd put it on, like, the back of my hand, because then you could move it wherever you want it in any given time. Or maybe the front of my hand. I mean, I was thinking, like, the White House or something. Oh.

I thought she meant just, like, put it on somewhere else on your bottom. She didn't specify. Like, put your eyeball somewhere, but it still works. Oh, okay. So you're, like, spying on something. Well, having two eyeballs is important for depth perception. So realistically, I'd move one of my eyeballs like a millimeter to the right on my face to just keep it kind of in the same spot because it's useful to have two right there.

I'd want one in like a really beautiful location, like in the jungle and Borneo. Just so you can like, like if commercials are on, you can just close that eye. I can just close one eye and be like in Borneo in the jungle and be like, ah, this is so nice. And then, yeah. Yeah, I'd want it to spy on someone. I just don't, I can't think of who would be like the best person. You're trying to think of one that's not perverted. I mean, maybe just the Oval Office.

Probably that's a great answer. Interesting to see what goes on in there. Or the best would be like on someone who travels around a lot, like phone or something. Like an important person, but like you're going to all the meetings with them. Yeah, it'd be tough because you could see everything that's happening. but you wouldn't really be able to be hearing anything because your ear isn't going along with you. You'd have to do a lot of inferring and kind of guessing.

But if you saw, like, you know, I'm not going to get into specifics. But you see some interesting people walking to the Oval Office, I'm sure. But like no one's going to believe you. Yeah, that's true. Like my eyes in the Oval Office. You don't get it. What's that fort with all the gold?

Bragg. Knox? No, that's not. Fort Knox. Yeah. Fort Knox. Like on like the main security guys? just like learn all the codes and stuff.

That's a good one. I think you would wonder why there's an eye right next to like the keypad code though. Well, that guy might just be like, well, maybe I'd put my eye behind his eye. That's a good one. Just see the back of his eye for the rest of your life. And then let's just do.

Jennifer Lee Dumas wants to know how we feel about the Disney movie Brave what type of bears in it? Oh yeah, we all saw this together, I think, for the first time. That was like very early days of our friendship. I saw it in Missoula. I don't know if it was your guy's first time, but me, you, and Cindy, we all went. I really like it. I think it's great.

What type of bears? I think the bear, the bear design looks like a brown bear, but they're really dark. So it's kind of like a black brown bear almost, but they're designed like brown bears. And I really liked, I think it was more dune. is the name of the evil bear. I really liked the way it looked. It just looked really scary and cool. I like that movie a lot.

I think it's a great Pixar movie. Yeah. I like bows. Is it Pixar? Bows and arrows. Yeah. No, it's just Disney. It's just Disney.

I think he's right. Are you right? Disney. Oh. Yeah, I don't think it's Pixar. My whole life, I got to think about everything. Because it's like more cartoon-y looking to. Yeah.

Pixar always goes like more TV. Yeah, but they've ventured out. Yeah, Disney Pixar, Brave. Oh, snap. Okay. We'll issue a correction corner next episode. I like Pixar most all the time. So I like Brave, but it would be in my bottom half of Pixar.

It's in the middle for me. But it's still a movie. Be right in the middle for me, too. All right. All right. That's good. Thanks, guys. Yeah.

We'll talk to you guys later. We love you. If you want more content, check out our Patreon or Apple Gris Club channels. Constantly posting new stuff there. Our new schedule is four main feed episodes a month and two bonus episodes a month. So we're putting out a lot of episodes. I do think we're going to kind of experiment with new types of episodes, too. I'm kind of putting together a story that might be one that doesn't really involve a lot of animals,

but it's still kind of a survival adventure story. So we might just kind of zig and zag a little bit, but we hope you guys are on board, and we're excited for this year. Yeah. And thank you to all of our subscribers. We aren't actually rich as just kind of a robot joke. But you guys do really help us to be able to focus on tooth and claw financially. So that's been huge for us and just want to say thank you for that.

Yeah. We appreciate it. Without a doubt, had it not been for our subscribers, this would not. The ship would not be putting out as many as we're putting out. Yeah, exactly. All right. Love you guys. See ya.