Tosh Show - My Autopsy Performing Forensic Pathologist - Dr. Mario Rascon

Episode Date: June 2, 2026

Daniel chops it up with Dr. Mario A. Rascon, who grew up in Chihuahua, Mexico, and now lives and works on the U.S. side of the border as the Chief Medical Examiner of El Paso County. Join our Patreon for exclusive content: http://patreon.com/toshshow

Do you get nervous ever when you're alone around cadavers? We work office hours. It's never really, you never have, like, a hunch late at night and you have to, like, go back to work and go in and check on something. I'll check the next day. Ever? Tosh Show. Tosh Show. Welcome to Tosh Show.

Trump sucks. It's good. That's how we start the show. Yeah, we're political. It's a political show. And then we just say that We just say Trump sucks And then the rest of the episode

We just talk about things That have nothing to do with politics Exactly But we weed out the people that might want to hear that stuff Right you get the people right away Like oh you have to bring it up He's just the comedy Later

Turning off Oh man This is a good episode How do I know it's a good episode When it's just started I just got a hunch A vibe How was your week Eddie?

Good great week Did you do anything fun? Nope That's the best week. Listen. When you get to Eddie's age, a good week is like, oh,

nothing bad happened. Come back and talk about the dumbest things. I saw Hank from, from Breaking Bad at the gym today. Did you? I did. I sat next to Dimitri Martin at breakfast. This week,

but I didn't say hi because I don't know him. Right. Yeah. And I'm like, I don't want to do this. But you guys know of each other. I was with my family, my kids.

My kids were talking loud. he was doing something different. He's got the same haircut. Yeah. It doesn't matter. Listen, I do want to talk about my wife for a minute. Okay. A lot of times on this show, I poke fun at her,

and people have written like, oh, my goodness, the things that he says, whatever. It's only funny the way I will tease my wife because our relationship is so solid. but this week what she did i mean my love for her was was all time to begin with but what i witnessed i mean i don't know what it was like uh to watch jesus perform miracles but what i watched my wife do floored me i can't wait for never loved her more than than watching this feat of momism there's a play date at our house and my son has a few

few of his friends over. And then my daughter is joining in. And my son includes his younger sister, because he's a fucking decent person. Love it. And they're, they're running out, they're playing with the pig, they're doing random stuff. And they come back into his room. Uh, people are getting their, their bags to leave. And right around the time they're leaving, uh, he shows one of them, uh, his fish. And the water's murky. And that's on Carly, my wife. She doesn't clean it as often as should and she knows that that's her job. You know, the chickens were also her job, but she, you know, read one time that if you're pregnant and near a chicken coop, it could make your kid, you know, have a beak, be a right winger. So, you know, a re-republican. Anyway, her job is the fish tank.

And it was cloudy. Anyway, all of a sudden, I hear it from a different room. My son, it burst into tears. his fish is floating Uh-oh We've all been there Yeah Yeah You buy a gold fish You hope it lasts a week

And then you're done with it This has been around For a couple years So now there's just like a bunch of kids sobbing at a dead pet In the house I'm like It's a nightmare

And my Then my daughter Who is not She's not crying She just wants to play Or do something else And I'm like Bitch

I got to gotta fucking handle this right now. I can't be dealing with you right now. She's so I just yell at her. I'm like you go down find panda. Okay. Go go to go down to the guest house. You send her out. I just send her out and she's now she's screaming crying because she just got yelled at for no reason. But I was like I'm worried about my son who's just crying because of his dead pen. And meanwhile, the parents just show up at this exact moment. Right. So now they're they're grabbing their kids and they're like, why is everybody screaming? I'm like, ah, the play date went bad. That's dead

Get him out of the house I'll give you an update later Okay my wife Takes over She's I'm consoling my son I'm telling them you know You gave him a great life Yes it was we had fun with him

I you know I'm looking at her going Fucking flush it Let's go She's over there performing CPR I don't know what she's doing She gets a bowl She puts water she's like, I think I can get him to come back.

I'm like, what? I'm just confused. I saw it with my own eyes. It's floating. The fish is sideways on the top of the, on top of a dirty tank of water. Dead. He's swimming now in this other little tiny bowl. What?

She's got him. My son starts screaming again because she's, after he's like, look, I got the, he's, he's starting to move again. But he's got this weird, like bloody hemorrhage on his forehead. Uh-huh. I'm like, that's not good. He's different now. Well, yeah, he's been affected by my wife basically poisoned him for a couple weeks in this bad water.

My wife is like, we got to change 50% of the water at the most. You know, this happened a couple weeks ago probably because I contaminated it by changing too many things out. I'm like, always with fish. You have to like leave some gross water. You have to have some good algae. None of this stuff I completely understand. I just want the tank to be cleared, but we have one goldfish in one bowl,

and I'm like, I'm not hiring somebody for this. Figure it out. She's like, I don't know how to test the water. Okay, she calls a friend of mine who has a company that, like, handles all these rich people's coy ponds and everything like that. And she's like, can you save this goldfish?

And he's, you know, he was sympathetic because it's like a child's. Yeah. He's like, I'll bring over some fresh, you know, a couple gallons of pond water. And I'll fix your system. I'll make it right as rain. And she's like, when? He's like, Monday. And she's like, it's fucking Friday.

He's like, well, you want to do like an emergency call? And my wife is like, this, this $1 goldfish. Anyway, he brings over some pond water and the goldfish just jumps back to life. Wow. just happy as can be in this pond where. And he's like, don't worry about it. You know, if you ever need me in the future, just give me a call. I'm like, oh, my goodness, this guy, Kevin saved my goldfish.

My son is just happy as can be. Meanwhile, in like three or four days, this hemorrhage on his head is completely gone. I want to drink some of this pond water. Well, I don't know if it's a pond water. It was just my wife's quick thinking. All of it. I was just baffled. I was like, I can't believe you pulled this off.

No one's ever saved a goldfish. Right. In the history of a goldfish. Here's now, let, but I get involved because I was forced to be involved and I'm looking things up while she's in his room switching the fish from one aquarium to a bowl to some pond water. I started looking. So one goldfish, guys. How many gallon tank should a single goldfish be in?

Just a normal child's goldfish. Go ahead. place your bets. Five gallon. Okay. What's your guess? One gallon. Three.

What's your guess, Pete? One. The answer is between 30 and 50 gallons. What? Is what one gold fish should be in. If it's two, it better be 50 gallons. What was he living in? A three gallon bowl.

Uh-huh. He's about two inches now. He's getting too big. That blew my mind. So he says to me, my buddy says, hey, he's too big for this. And my wife doesn't want a big aquarium as one goldfish. He says, why don't you let me take the goldfish? I'll put it in one of our ponds, one of our nice ponds.

I'll have a beautiful life. Your son can come visit, being one of your neighbors, coy ponds or whatever. And I'll give you a tiny fish that's meant for this three-gallon aquarium that you got. And I'm like, that's a great idea. because the goldfish is now alive and well, and then we say he's outgrown this, he needs to go to a bigger place.

Let me run this idea by my son. I just cat. I'm just talking, like, what if you, what if you think maybe if your goldfish is too big for this, what if we know a big place that he could go to that we don't have? As soon as I bring it up, he's just wise to the whole thing. You're going to take my pet, just starts wailing, crying again.

I'm like, oh, no, no, we're not going to take them. No, mom and I just wanted to want to know what size. Should we go 30 or 50? Oh, that's good. You went with quick. No, we're going to do it. We'll buy a bigger tank. Uh-huh.

We haven't. We haven't yet, but we will, I guess. He seems to be thriving now. I might just have them just, I think what's happening now is I'm going to be on the hook once every two to three weeks having them come in and do the full water treatment, make sure it's clean and pay them 60 bucks and just be like, whatever. I have a 60 bucks every three week expense that I shouldn't have, but it's better than having the conversation with my son about we bought a fish

and we're not responsible enough to put him in what he deserves to be in. I mean, yeah. Should have gotten him a beta. Well, again, it's all my wife's problem. Now, if he were to die, I would have performed an autopsy on him. And I probably would have spent a fortune on that just to prove that it was my wife's fault in the first place that he was in that situation. She wasn't clean in the aquarium regularly enough. And then when she would, she would clean it too well.

Oh, good algae, bad algae. Lesson, life is fragile. Whether it's a goldfish or, you know, some guy who was murdered by the drug cartel. Today's guest, he can get to the bottom of it. Enjoy. The weather is finally warming up, which means it's time to liberate your thighs from their wintry captivity. They've been trapped in jeans for months, pale, confused, and forgotten, but now it's a fish. suns out thighs out season. I think that's how the saying goes. Uh, guys, it's Chubby's season.

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And right now, IQ Bar is offering our special podcast listeners 20% off all IQ bar products, including the ultimate sampler pack, plus free shipping. To get your 20% off, text to 64,000. That's TOSH to 64,000. Message and data rates may apply. See terms for details. If you ever die a foul play out in the West Texas area, there's a good chance my guest today will disassemble your body. Luckily, he's a doctor and the chief medical examiner of El Paso. Please welcome forensic pathologist Mario doctor how are you? We're doing well, thanks. First question, do you believe in ghosts?

No. I think this ends the bit. Yeah, that's it. If Mario doesn't believe in ghosts, then that's it. We know. I mean, if anybody were to have seen a ghost, it would be Mario. I think so. Mario, you were born in Chihuahua, Mexico.

Tell me what it's like to grow up in a city full of small aggressive dogs that never stop barking and shivering. No, for real. What is Chihuahua Mexico like? It's a lot like El Paso. It's the same weather. We're in the desert. It's relatively small. It's less than a million people. And it's pretty quiet. The dog, I think, it's supposed to be from there. But ironically, there's not a whole lot of chihuahuas in Chihuahua, I would say. Did you know that I replaced the Chihuahua for the Taco Bell campaign commercials? I did know that. And do you hold that against me, is the next. question. Oh, no. Okay. What's it like living in a border town? I mean, I've lived in El Paso for 14 years, and I was always familiar with it, so it's never been like an experience for me. I was just there.

The back and forth. Is it no big deal jumping, going back and forth? No, it's not big deal. Juarez and El Paso are basically, if you wanted to, they... It's twin cities. Right. They're just separated or joined by a literal bridge. You can go have launching Juarez and come back. and that should be fine. I mean, I feel like when people don't travel and they've never lived anywhere near the border, they have this idea of how, like that it's scary. Yes, there's some people from El Paso

that have lived all their lives in El Paso. And you ask him about this restaurant in Juarez and it's like, no, no, I haven't been there. Okay, when was the last time you went to Horitz? I've never been there. But they have an opinion. Uh-huh. So they even have an opinion there.

That's peculiar. Right. The only thing I know about Juarez is what I've learned from Sicario. Mostly accurate. I think people have the idea that violence would spill into the U.S., but that's really not the case. It's different law enforcement, different problems, different gangs. If anything, if you want to off someone in El Paso,

you may want to wait till they go to Juarez and do it there. Oh. Is that the right move? It may even reduce violence in El Paso. You initially thought you wanted to go into psychiatry. Tell me how many patients did you have to listen to drone on about their stupid problems before you decided to pivot to hanging around dead people all day. Hearing about people's problems was what I thought psychiatry was.

What drove me away from it was that you realize most true psychiatric patients are kind of like beyond treatment. You're just managing, you know, their symptoms or whatever. I actually thought psychiatry was more like psychotherapy. So when it was not that, just medicine for this medicine. for that, that actually straighted me away from it. And then I fell back on my initial, like, early medical school courses like anatomy, histology that concerned themselves more with the disease rather than treating or seeing patients. And I just kind of never look back.

Is there a difference among a forensic pathologist, a coroner, a chief medical examiner? Are they just simply titles? They're titles, but there's a difference. So the main concept, I guess, is everyone does medical legal death investigation. For the most part, coroners are elected officials. You have to run for the coroner's office. And medical examiners are appointed, trained doctors. They have to go to medical school, though you residency in pathology,

go subspecialty training in forensic pathology, and then you may or may not end up working for a coronary jurisdiction. The main issue is the shortage of forensic pathologists. So there's studies that have said that you probably need like around 2,000 medical examiners for every medical legal autopsy to be performed by a trained physician. And right now there's less than 500. So in comes the coroner's system, which has people other than doctors, I guess, signing those

debt certificates. So trained forensic pathologists much prefer to work under a medical examiner jurisdiction because they actually signed a debt certificate. How was your bedside manner? Or does it even matter? I think it matters because we have, I mean, we have other employees. We have sometimes visitors, law enforcement officers or things like that. So you always have to, I mean, you carry yourself.

When you're doing surgery on them, I mean, do you call it surgery still if they're dead? We call them autopsies. Okay. When you're doing just autopsies, are you careful? Are you allowed to just open up and go to town? I mean, depending on your definition of going to town. But part of the training is to make your motions efficient. And that means saving a few seconds here and a few seconds there that add up.

And that can look to the untrained eye as, you know, inelegant maybe. Okay. But if you know what you're doing, then it's just a dissection. How much has it changed your view on death, just being around bodies? I think for me, it has gone through this almost learning curve where, At first, it messes up with your head a little bit. You start thinking of your own mortality. Then you see a case of, you know, someone that age that does the same thing.

So you start thinking about that. Then it turns more your realization that you're there to document the findings and you're kind of how you feel or your opinion about that doesn't really matter. And then it kind of goes full circle where you do get some appreciation of, you know, like today, not to sound corny, but you start rearranging your priorities accordingly. Once you know, you can go any day for any reason. Do you get nervous ever when you're alone around cadavers? Well, I'm never alone around cadaver.

Never. No, that's never. Because at the very least there's an autopsy technician doing the case with you. We work office hours. It's never really... You never have like a hunch late at night and you have to like go back to work and go in and check on something. No. I didn't look under the fingernails.

I'll check the next day. Ever? Check the next day. They're not going anywhere. The case doesn't have to be cracked tonight. Oh, that's so funny. What's your success rate of solving why, when you have a case? Can you always figure it out?

Most of the times, I think the acceptable, undetermined determination for cause and of death, it's around like 4%. And most forensic pathologies that I know have that. And it's not really defeat on itself. Sometimes, you know, the body is decomposed and whatever cost of death was there is obscured by those changes. Sometimes you don't arrive at the cost of death, but you've been able to rule out a whole lot of things that he was poisoned, that they were beaten up.

And those are also answers. How do you distinguish between accidental overdose and suicide? So suicide as a medical term for manner of death determination requires proof of intent. So without that person sending out text or actually writing a suicide note or having prior past attempts or things like that, then the threshold gets pretty high to say, no, I think this was an attempt to hurt yourself. So no matter how many pills somebody ingest, unless there was like you can, it can be, it's considered an. accidental overdose. Sometimes in that specific case where there's like 200 pills, then I think most medical examiners would say, well, the sheer amount of pills that were injected by itself

represents an attempt to hurt yourself. So they may sign of that as a suicide based on that. How often do you have to do an autopsy? What constitute, I mean, when do you not do an autopsy? The reasons why you must perform an autopsy differ from case to case. Sometimes it's to figure out what the cost of death was. Sometimes it's you know the cause of death, but you have to properly document everything that it's seen there. Like a gunshot wound of the head, you really don't need a degree to say,

hey, that's the cost of death. But in that case likely we'll go to court, and then in court you're going to be asked about the range of fire, like how far from the body the weapon was, the trajectory. Everything is about covering your ass. Isn't most of medicine like that? I know. So forensic pathology is no different.

A little depressing. Who do you deal with most at your work? Who is the person that is constantly checking on your work? Are you dealing with detectives, family? Yeah, there's a lot of phone calls. It could be attorneys, law enforcement. Families, I have to say, really only get to talk to me after they've gone through, like, other filters,

like the investigator that was at the scene or have some admin issue or help. Our family is not allowed to directly contact you? No, they are a lot. What I'm saying is most of their questions have to do with, you know, orientation for funeral arrangements or where can the body be released. And they don't really need my input. There's a whole administrative wing of the office that deals with that.

So my interactions are with, like, people I report to, which is the county administrator. And then, yeah, attorneys, the bulk of that would be setting up a trial where I'm going to be testifying as an expert witness. How fun is going to trial? Not very. How often do you have to do this? Personally, I probably will like once a month.

Oh, yeah. Oh, that's what a headache. It's probably one of the more impactful, important things that we do. But it's also, it's time-consuming. And, you know, the court speaks a language that is very counterintuitive to how we think. So it's a little eroding. Does it ever get contentious in there? Are they attacking what your findings were?

Yes. It's all sorts of degrees to that. Criminal defense attorneys are crafty, and they're supposed to be crafty, and they will argue with you on the science or on the facts or just on you. Now, there's no way that you're going to be able to answer this question. I'll give you that heads up. But has anybody ever, you know, walked in and said,

hey, why don't you take this huge stack of money? and go ahead and say that this is why this person died. You get any of that stuff there? Never. I thought I could trap you with that question. Very crafty, yeah. Very crafty. I've never even heard of an offer being made to any forensic employees that I know.

Seems like you're really, really trying to push the, I've never been involved in this. Maybe too much someone's argue. Can somebody just automatically request an autopsy? regardless and pay for it and you'll perform it, or is that not something you can just order? So in Texas, you're bound by this thing called the Code of Criminal Procedure that stipulates when a case is the purview of the medical examiner. So we're bound by law to take jurisdiction on certain cases. Now, if we decline jurisdiction because we think it's a straight-up natural

death and we don't really concern ourselves with that's due to disease alone, then a family can hire a private pathologist to conduct another. Okay. What are some of the stranger cases that you've had to come across? I don't know. I mean, like homicide staged as suicide can be striking. Do you feel like they're trying? Those are set up specifically like to trick you.

Are you, are some of them done poorly? And you're like, oh, come on. Yes. Yeah. The striking part of that statement is like, oh, man, that guy. wanted to get away with this. Yeah. It's so funny.

You had one case where someone had hung themselves with Christmas lights. That's correct. I mean, you have to be able to kind of chuckle at some of this stuff. It's just, this is what you do all day long. Were the Christmas lights on? No. Okay. Well, I mean, I just, and then my follow-up question to that would have been, were they blinking?

That's bad. All right. Let me compose myself. I get professional again. Have you ever considered lying to a family to give them closure that isn't so horrific? I mean, yes and no. I will omit certain details that I know will be painful if I can spare them. Mm-hmm.

And sometimes I may, yeah, I'll stick with the truth. But then, yeah, I may omit one gory detail. Are you speaking to them? or is this just like writing some form out? No, they will make an appointment and meet me at the office. Oh, and you have to sit down. Right. And I'll tell you this much.

So all the families are appreciative of, you know, the time that we spend with them. A lot of families hear something they didn't want to hear. Like, no, my opinion is that your loved one, in fact, committed suicide. And even if you tell them something they don't want to hear, even that still puts them a little closer to closure. So I think any interaction is a good one. Now, if someone says, my loved one died in a car crash and they said, you know, he made it to the hospital and they worked on him for two hours and then died. And then I would tell him, oh, you know, he had the type of injuries that I'm sure he didn't feel pain.

Right. And, you know, like that's not nothing. No, I know, but it's a lie. If I actually believe that there's a chance he didn't feel pain because of the structures and brain that we're injured yeah i'll say it how many bodies are rolling through a week anywhere between 10 and 20 is there a busy season no all right i don't know i didn't know if all of something this is when people drop off talk about the smells are there smells at work yeah is it horrible the first couple of times okay so it's horrible if you're telling me i have to get used to it that that's not good it's not case by

case yeah yeah some cases are not smelly okay that's good i'm good i'm I'd like just some cases are smellier than others, but yeah. Can a man have a boner after they're dead? No. Okay. That blood goes away. Now you're, this is good. I've never, I've never had to answer that question.

Hasn't someone died while, while doing something erotic or making love? And then I want to know if their boner sticks around. Or does it shrivel up immediately when you die? I think that's a case by case. thing, but mostly, intuitively, I would think it would seed. It will go away. Now, you're completely desensitized probably to a naked human dead body, but I'm sure in your time where you've seen an unusually large or unusually small penis, you've been like,

holy cow. Maybe, maybe, silently. That's not something we will discuss. Okay, that's fair. What about noises? How long after death are there? the body is still doing any twitches or gases or any of that stuff happening? Not twitches, but gases is pretty common. For how long? Weeks. A week?

Oh, I didn't know that. In fact, a body that's been decomposing has more gas in them. So if someone has been dead for three weeks and it's now bloated and green, if you turn them or whatever, then some gas is bound to exit. Any of it like liquid? Does it you get sprayed? Any of that stuff happened to you? I've never been sprayed.

But yeah, there's fluids. Oh, there's fluids. Have you ever solved a cold case? No. How often do you get cold cases? Every year or so, we'll get an email. But it's not, you know, everything about this job is like very compartmentalized. So I don't, I wouldn't ever even think of myself as solving anything.

We're really just doing the autopsy and producing a report and having an opinion. But the rest is like law enforcement work. and the legal system doing its thing. Are you allowed to talk about cases? I think all of that is just whatever your common sense dictates. But there's not like... There's not a law that says you shouldn't... No.

You're not allowed to discuss an ongoing court case, for example. That's by law. But, you know, once it's done, it's done. No HIPAA rules. Yeah, is HIPAA a factor? Not for the medical examiner. How often is fentanyl the cause of a death? Are you seeing it?

Yes. This past couple of years it's gone slightly down but then cocaine compensates. Okay, so it's one of the other. Right. I think last year we had around, I don't know, maybe 80 fentanyl-related deaths

in the county. Fennell scares me just because I don't like it when I hear of something worse, oh, somebody else just thought they were taking some random sleeping pill and next thing you know, they're dead. And I don't worry about that for me.

I just worry about my kids doing something stupid when they're in college. Does this make you paranoid about everything? I would say worried, yes. Do people use bodies as drug mules? I don't think so. You've never opened up a body and been like, oh, no. Oh, we've had cases of mules that died while transporting money.

That's what I'm looking for. I thought you were talking about dead bodies being stuffed with drugs. Afterwards? Afterwards. I mean, I don't know if you're going to send a body back. over the border to a family, maybe, maybe that's, I'm sure that's been done. Right. Not a lot of people are like opening up a casket to, anyway, but you have seen people die

from being drug mules carrying bags inside of them. They exploded or what? Yes. So the way at least that case was, is just tightly wrapped cocaine bags. And then, yeah, one of them perforates and it's basically like you swallowed, you know, 50 grams of cocaine and then you get a heart attack and you die. Whenever I think of those, before, if I were the mule in this scenario, and you're like, either put it up your butt or swallow it, I would be like, you know what, hey, why don't we just try taping it to my leg? And let's just see if that works.

For one or two pellets, but this person had like a hundred of those. I'm guessing drug traffickers want a mule that can carry like half a kilo. Were you fine as a kid in school dissecting the frog? Yeah, yeah. I was that kid that was like, yeah, I got it. Yeah, yeah, I got it. Give him the big one. Give him the big frog.

He's fine with that. I'll tell you. I went all the way to rabbit. I'm 6'6. You're 6'6? Yes. Nah, that's a great height, huh? It is.

6.6. Are you the tallest in your family? I am. By a lot? Yeah, my... So I have two brothers. One is 6-1. That's the oldest, and then the other one is 6-4.

We make fun of the 6-1. As far as Mexican, I mean, are you guys the tallest Mexican family in your city? Maybe. I think you might. So I'll give you this piece of trivia now. Okay. There's some, and I don't know if there's a way to verify it. We won't verify it.

But there's like, if you order like cities by average male height, I think the top city is somewhere in the Netherlands. And Chihuahua specifically is like top five. So, I mean, what? That's... Northern Mexicans are tall. I'm a fan of that fact. Yes.

Northern Mexicans are tall and it's in the top five. Is it men or just all women too? The way I remember the start is male. Oh, man. That's a good step. And the irony from Chihuahua. Yeah. You were recently diagnosed with autism.

Do you think having lived with it your whole life has helped you in this particular field? Yes, very much. Wait, how old were you when you were diagnosed? I was 41. I was during the pandemic. If you would have had this diagnosis, let's say, at five, how do you think it would have shaped your life differently from where you are now? Or do you think it wouldn't have? No, I think it would with like the proper,

I guess support or strategies or whatever. Growing up wouldn't have been as weird. Or at least you would have an explanation for how this otherness that you've always felt that you don't quite belong into like any particular group. That was actually what was refreshing when I got the diagnosis as an adult because it was like, oh, so that explains why I've always been like this or like that. I mean, that's great. I've always wanted, there's a group of dads here that I live around that I've always wanted all of us to go get tested.

And just give me some closure. Because when I'm talking to some of these people, like, guys, we've all, trust me, I know I'm probably undiagnosed for a million things. IBS is at the top of the list. But what is the test? You know, up to, okay. Go ahead. I was just going to say, I was going to out you. You can cut it.

Up to 50% of people on the spectrum have GI associated illnesses. Yes, it all makes sense. I mean, that to me is as good enough as a... There's your test. Oh, it's so... 50%. That's great. 50%.

It's such a perfect number. Why is it so perfect that it's 50? And most people up to 80% will have another mental health stuff, mostly ADD. I think 80% of people on the spectrum have also ADD. And they can have sleep disorders. They can have all sorts of things from anxiety all the way to proper bipolar disorder, although that's a minority. If you don't mind sharing, what are some of the key traits that you had? Autism spectrum disorder, which is like the proper.

name, I guess. They don't want to call it Asperger anymore because he was a Nazi. Is that why they stopped calling it? Yeah. So we're not saying Asperger's anymore. I didn't know that. All right. Good. Hans Asperger was a Nazi sympathizer that ran a bunch of studies with children with autism. Okay. So he loses his title. It's a neurodevelopmental disorder, meaning your brain is formed in a different way than the usual brain. And it gives you difficulties in, let's say, five different domains. So it would be the social domain, communication, the verbal, motor, and repetitive behaviors.

And then the spectrum part of it comes from, not everyone has the same difficulties to the same degree in the same domain. So that's why it's a spectrum. So some people are just socially awkward. That's when you hear, you know, the eye contact, it's a bit of an offensive thing. Your energy gets drained when you're out in public and you need to recharge on your own.

So that would be one thing. The communication thing is with the literal thinking, like if you're not told exactly the instruction, then it's like it never happened. And then there's inflexibility with your routines that you get really distressed when, you know, some people like to eat the same thing every day, some people on the spectrum. Or at the same time. Or, right? How accurate are TV dramas when it comes to your line of work?

And can you watch them or do they make you cringe? So they're not accurate. I've never really watched a whole episode. You never watched a CSI or anything like that? I watched the first season of the first CSI. The Vegas? Right. Okay.

And I liked it enough. I mean it was a decent show. I wasn't even into forensics at the time. So this is when I was in medical school. I haven't even discovered forensic pathology. Weekend at Bernies. How did that affect you as a child? Or did you watch that and go, oh, my goodness, this is my calling.

How could you keep a body from stinking? By the way, how long can a body actually be pliable like that to move around on vacation? They were a warm place, right? There was a beach. I mean, yes. Yeah, they were definitely doing the whole. You wouldn't have more than 12 hours before. They shot that whole movie in under 12 hours.

It's weeks. That is impressive. Walking around weeks with that guy. That's great. All right. Well, everybody's on my show, Mario, gets gifts. It's just stuff around my house, okay? So don't get excited.

But I know that you're going straight from here, and I appreciate you stopping here first before you go fly. So we got some of these new ear buds, Ray Khan. You're going to love them. Awesome. Don't. Have you heard of water cremation? No.

Oh. You got to look into this. this. Are you going to be... Is this thing where they turn you into a plant or something? No, well, they do whatever afterwards. No, it's just a way, the same way of getting your body down to ash, but you're putting this water and they put this chemical in it, and within like four to six hours, you're done. Some people don't like the idea of fire. Right. Burning the right. So this water cremation is starting to get popular. Our buddy, Steve, does it in Florida, but he lives here. Anyway, he, uh, he gave me an urn.

and this urn dissolves in the water. So if you wanted to throw your body into like the ocean, then this would dissolve. And anyway, I'll be honest with you, there's no chance my body's going in this. So I want you to have this urn. It's nice. You're welcome.

Then here's what I got you. I know you're traveling. You need to keep, you need to have a hip sack on you at all time. You get the planned pair to lets people know, hey, I'm American, but I'm also an ally. Yeah, whatever. I got you an adapter case you didn't have one today.

this one's got all the chargers on did you have an adapt? I bought one yesterday Oh you bought one yesterday? Now you got two and that's fine Awesome that's good Here this right here I got I travel with these two okay You know what this is? This is sink suds It's laundry detergent for your sink

You put your underwear in it you clean everything up That way you don't have to I bought this a long time ago Gilbert Godfrey used to do his laundry in the sink On the road as a comic and I always thought these were hysterical. Anyway, you'll like that. I will use it, dude.

This, I got, just some fun bracelets to give your daughter when you get back from the trip. This one was, I took my wife, this is from Europe. So you can say that some of them are nice, I don't know, but my wife just is like, yeah, just give her a bunch of these. She's an eight-year-old. They'll love it. I can tell she liked them. Yeah, there's some real things in here.

I don't know. But some of this is, some of it's probably garbage. Who knows? Some of it's not even open. This one's got an eyeball on it. Are you an organ donor? No. Why are you not an organ donor?

Is there going to be a real sad answer that I'm going to be mad about? Yes. Okay. Let's hear it. I'm sure it varies from jurisdiction to jurisdiction. I don't like how, I guess, Eager is too much of a benign word. Their organ procurement organizations are really sneaky and pushy. and I think treat the families in an unfair way.

And then there's some other layers to that where I think organ procurement, sometimes it even violates the very rules that they're supposed to operate under. There's this thing, and I don't know how in-depth you want to go into, there's this thing called donation after cardiac death. So it typically, the way organ donation is you're pronounced brain dead, and that is irreversible.

No one has ever come back from being pronounced brain dead. Now, there's different layers now that they have added saying, oh, he's not brain dead, but his dead is impending. And then they call it, you know, cardiac imminent cardiac death. Now, some people have actually come back from that. There's people that just recover in the OR minutes before the procurement took place. So I don't really like to roll with that. Oh, man.

Imagine being in there waiting for that. And then they're like, oh, man, he's back. Okay, look at that was the longest I've ever gone with stuff on my desk. My head was about to explode. By the way, here's just a little journal, in case you ever want to. But I left one of the jokes that I started writing in there. It's a negative joke about my wife, but I don't want to get into it. Put this over here and let you put this on the desk, okay?

That was good. By the way, I didn't think I was going to stumble across such a gem. when it came to the organ donation. I am an organ donor, but I am just all for my body being ripped apart as soon as possible and scattered everywhere. Just let it happen.

I want my eyes in, hopefully my wife's new husband's face. That would be nice. That's kind of neat. And I'm still around. Is it only if someone else can use it? Because some people can donate their cadavers to like anatomy labs in medicals.

What about that? Would you do that? I wouldn't do that, no. Not personally, but I know the medical school. You got to help your own, your people. I am helping my people by doing the autosies. You brought me something as well? I did. I did. Okay. Here's a spleen. In his World Series of Poker Backpack, hopefully it's a stack of high society.

Oh, what is this? It's a bag inside a bag. It's a bag. It's a bag. Oh, geez. How many T-shirts? There's five. I thought, well, yeah. We mean to give to other people? Yeah. You get to pick, I guess. Is it all El Paso related? El Paso stuff.

It's a lot. So our AAA baseball team is a Chihuahuas, in fact. The Chihuahas of El Paso. Do you watch, do you ever watch the games? I've been to a couple of games, yes. Okay. It's fun. It's a nice park.

University of Texas El Paso. I just like the image there. It's kind of funny. Why are they minors? I don't know. Say mine. What is this? That's just like an El Paso thing.

That's just an El Paso shirt. Yeah, he has like a mountain. I get it to you to describe the shirt for me. This might be my favorite. Guys, this is right here. You're going to see me wear this. You know a city in Texas? I can't, I just can't stand.

I'm going to go say. San Antonio. No, I like San Antonio. Well, I hate the, good gosh, much more. What is this junk? Oh, this is nice. This is, guys, this is official.

office of the medical... Do you think... By the way, can you hold something up? Do you hold up a wallet and, like, show a badge and get in places? We have a badge. So many mediums. I don't know how to the old one that's tall?

We're all... You're a bunch of mediums. I'm six four. Not everybody's tiny just because you're six six. Well, I'm sure you know someone who's a medium. Dylan. There you go. His mom drank while she was pregnant.

Uh... I like San Antonio. I love San Antonio performing there. I hate the Riverwalk. The River Rock's garbage. I don't care about that at all. No, the city that I hate in, Lubbock. Oh, Lubbock.

I cannot stand it when I'm in Lubbock. Well, it's the worst. That's all. Anyway, this is very nice of you. Thank you for getting so many shirts. Did you actually peel the tag prices off? I did. I thought it was weird.

Well, yeah, I get it. But, like, I can't believe you bought stuff. That's even crazy. He's at the airport. That's nicer than one I... Did you get this at the airport? I didn't. God damn it, no, no.

I didn't. I would love that so much. These are nice. Thank you so much. Are you like a firefighter that when you see kids, you go, hey, here you go, have one of these. Nah. No, you should start. Neither.

It's a funny keychain for a kid to have on the office of the corner. It's funny if a kid has a keychard. It's great. It's not the corner. Medical examiner, okay? He's not an elected official. You think you'll ever run? Never.

Oh, you'd get my vote. Thanks. You'd get my vote. We'll be right back. Are you a Spurs fan? No. Do you watch any sports? I watch football and the NBA

when it's the playoff flight right now. Right now, you're not watching the Spurs? I grew up. idolizing Sean Kemp at the supersonics, which then turned into the thunder. Remember when Sean Kemp grabbed his testicles at the Olympics, hanging on the rim, and he just grabs his nuts? Do you remember that?

Oh, are you kidding me? I actually don't remember that. The Rain Man dunked and grabbed his nuts, and it became like a big, it was like, oh, we shouldn't do this as Americans. This is so disrespectful. I've been a Sean Kemp lifelong fan, and I didn't know that. Do you know how many children he is? Seven, I think.

I'll take the over. Yeah, it could be. I take the over. I'll take the over. I'll take the over. Look it up. Somebody give me, how many kids is Sean Camp has? It's seven.

Wait, six women. You think, all right, all right, you might. Mario's a super fan. I can't believe you don't remember the nut grab. At least seven, it says, it says at least seven. With six different women. It says at least seven. Well, that's a good.

He's a good guy. In your medical opinion, was Mike, Jackson murdered. So murder and I'm going to get, I guess, pedantic on words. So murder is like a legal term. Mm-hmm. And the term, I wouldn't even see equivalent, but the terminology that the medical professionals use,

specifically in death certification, would be homicide, which literally means death at the hands of another. So in that sense, if he was injected, right, is impromptuble by someone else, and then he died because of that, technically the certification of death as it came out as homicide is accurate. But I wouldn't say he was murdered. All right.

Well, in your follow-up question, in your medical opinion, was he a pedophile? I don't know. I don't know. You have to answer it. But follow up to that. Can we still listen to his music and should we go see this new movie? I don't know. I know there's always a debate about separating the artist from the other.

And I don't even know where I stand on that. So if you like their music, just listen to the music. Yeah, well, I mean, some of their songs you have to listen to. I'm not going to stop listening to Man in the Mirror. I love that song. If I go, suspicious or not, when I die, I need you to perform an autopsy. Not because I think my wife is up to some shady stuff, but I just want her to have to deal with this for a little bit,

where some people are questioning why I died. So the way to turf a case to the medical examiner and some of them may not like hearing me spill the beats is to introduce either trauma or drugs. That's kind of like the keywords that would make us go like, okay, yeah, maybe we need to take a look into this. He was found dead in bed, but, you know, yesterday he hit his head and he was woozy.

So basically, even if I'm 100, right before I take my last breath, I need to whip out a hammer, give myself a couple bruises. All right, listen, I'm not above doing this. What's the end game? Are you going to just do this? Like, are you going to be one of these doctors that,

oh, I love my work? I'm going to do it until I'm 85 years old. No, the plan is definitely not doing that. Okay. I want to do 20 years, 25 most, and then maybe pivot into just something else. Write a book? Yeah, maybe.

I'd read that book. How do you handle dealing with death day in and day out? Does it ever just bum you out? It does, and I think it's a good thing that you feel it. Most people think you're, you know, you're desensitized already. You don't feel anything. And that's not totally accurate. I think you do feel it, but you get good at compartmentalizing.

So you're there to do a job, and then you get good at not taking that job home or work stuff. So I think the key to dealing with is leaving work at work and just keep your interests outside of medicine and balance your life. I'm not wired to where I could do it, where I could keep it at work. I mean, it's just if you have a sad case, it doesn't, you can't just, you just go home and go, oh, okay, well, now it's Friday. Let's get to Benegans. Is Benegans still a restaurant? I don't think so. I don't think it is.

Let's get to Benegins. I don't know what people do after work, all right? I never have had a job. Do you tell your daughter what you do for a living? Yes, she knows. And like, how do you talk about it? So you're being gradual. Because she started asking when she was maybe four.

Right now we're up at, like, when someone dies, daddy examines the body and he figures out what happened. So she's very comfortable talking about death already? To that degree, yes. I'm so, I'm struggling. My oldest is seven. And now death is a real thing and knows about people. getting killed and I'm just like oh I'm like every time I'm like oh here we go I got to

explain this to you yeah no her petfish died a couple of weeks ago and that was it surprised me how how affected she was so I don't think she's fully ready to talk about human death what you needed what what your daughter needed was my wife she is a goldfish miracle worker I'm just saying flat lining that won't stop her she'll bring her him back. Mario, thank you for being on the show. I hope next time I see you, they're slicing me open and framing my wife. Deal. All right. Deal. Pass show. Oh, what are they Mario for being on the show? Can you believe that, Carl? A six-foot-six Chihuahua. That's not racist. That's where he's from. That's right. From the city of Chihuahua.

I love that guy. I mean, what a life. He's seen. He's seen. it. Man, has he seen some stuff. Patreon.com slash toss show. That's where you get some extra. Extra laughs. Real stuff. I'm going right now.

That's where you go to get the extra laugh. Right. Look at that. Yeah. Toshoshoshostore.com. That's where you go to get all the cool wares. My first farewell tour. Tickets are on sale now.

Guess what? Blue dot fever. we got vaccinated. Yes, we did. Okay? We got vaccinated on my first farewell tour. So we are not suffering from blue dot fever like the rest of the entertainment industry is. Now, if you don't know what blue dot fever is, that's where concerts this summer are canceling.

And the artist will say personal reasons or some other bullshit. But the reality is it's blue dot fever that they have. and that's where when you go to the seat map for the concert, there's blue dots everywhere because they're not selling tickets. I like it. That's why you get vaccinated.

Okay? Important. Trump sucks. Now, there's music and when there's music. Carl, where did you go? Come on. You used to sit up for this whole segment.

And now you're completely laying down. Up. Let's go. Up. Come on. Let me see you. Those will just side eye me. Are you a part of the show or not?

Please. Oh, man. Let's do they love me, they love me not. What do you got? Okay, from Josh Bizarro. Daniel is so cool, he makes me wish I had IBS. Again, I want to point out, I've never actually been diagnosed with IBS. I just shit my pants a lot.

I feel like that's a diagnosis. No, that's not professional. Well, not professional. I've never had it written down. Can you die from IBS? Probably. Did you like it when he dropped that bomb today? About 50% of people on the spectrum have gastral issues.

Oh my goodness. That was like, by the way, he said three or four things that I was like, oh, my goodness. I have to get tested. But I'm only getting tested again if my entire wife's friend circles, husbands also get tested because I want all of these autistic fathers to be outed. I like it. I'll do it. IBS cannot kill you.

IBS cannot kill you. Non-life-threatening does not shorten your life. Shut the, are you drunk right now? What is it happening? He knows a lot about IBM. She'll start to start. The celebration, Daniel. You're going to live.

I asked the question an hour ago, Dylan. Well, this gin and tonic got in the way. All right. Let's do they, uh, well, the first one was they love me. Yeah, it was a weird way to say they love me. But okay, I'll let it slide. What do you got for they love me not? From Natch Derringer, uh, from the Heather Alfano interview,

Daniel interviews the one who got away. Oh, stupid. I read comments too. And I was even joking with Heather about it where people thought that there was a strong sexual bond between us or, or I bet they had sex. I don't get these people that have, never had a real relationship with a person of the opposite sex that wasn't sexual. And I've never had sex.

I would never have sex with her. Certainly not now. Oh. But it's just, and these people are like, like, oh, you can't have a relationship with a woman. And it not, you know, be, what are you fucking Mike Pence? Yeah, that's right.

Oh, I can't sit next to a woman. Remember what? I don't think we can say his name. You remember what's his name? The comic, and he would tell stories like, oh, he got sat next to a good-looking girl on the plane, and he had to, like, go to the bathroom in the back and jerk off. I've never understood guys like this that they can't have a relation.

Listen, I guess that's why it's scary to be a woman, because you don't know if you're sitting across from a guy that could go 25 years just being your friend genuinely, or somebody that's like, oh, the second I get the opportunity. I'm going to pounce. Mm-hmm. Well, anyway, no, I've never had a relationship with her or, you know, half of my good girlfriends.

And anytime I do cross the line with a girlfriend, you know, it ruins the relationship with my current girlfriend. As it would, yeah, I guess so. See you next week.