Tosh Show - My Builder - Sergio Ortiz

Episode Date: April 29, 2025

Daniel sits down with architect and home builder Sergio Ortiz to talk about growing up in Spain, building Daniel’s house twice, and surfing when he should be at work.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Everyone who stayed behind during the Woesley fire saved their house. I couldn't because I was in Vegas doing a charity show. What was your excuse for not saving my house? I got scared. Welcome to Tosh Show. Eddie, how are you? I'm doing good. My son's here. Hit him with a Hootie Hoo. He's not here. We just recorded that. Whenever I'm out in a crowded area, I'll just say to my son, just real quiet, I'll whisper to him, I'll say, hey, hit him

with a Hootie Hoo. And he'll just scream, Hootie Hoo. And it just makes me laugh. Usually makes people laugh around us. So now I'm gonna do it on the show. I'm gonna start using it. Hit him again! HOO-DEE-HOO! Oh, guess what? What?

I was going to the bathroom the other day. Okay. Okay, this is not a poop story. So calm down. I was going to the bathroom and I found a tick crawling around on my waistline. Oh, yeah, a real tick. And I'm like, it hadn't burrowed in.

Now, I noticed a few weeks ago, I went on a little rant about Lyme disease and how they have to be in you for 36 hours. And people told me I was way off. Those ticks, those deer ticks can be so tiny that you don't even notice that they're on you. You don't feel it or anything like that. They're like a speck. This tick is what I'm familiar with, which is basically a dog tick and they don't, I looked it up, they don't carry Lyme disease. But they, if they bite you and start going in, you're going to feel it.

Okay. That's when you take a match head and touch them on the butt and make them back up. I don't know how it works. Anyway, I had a tick crawling around on me. That's Carl's fault. I think they live on the, I got a lot of rabbits on the property. They carry a lot of ticks is what I'm told.

Oh well. Isn't that a pig thing? No, I don't think it's a pig thing. I mean, it could be. Listen, I'm living on a farm. Yeah. You got a farm going on over there. Yeah. I'm guess what?

What? I'm going to start working out. I think. Okay. I think I am. Okay. Well, here's, I know people look at me and they say that guy, what? He doesn't need to work out.

His body looks perfect. Handsome. Well, just chiseled. Ch to work out, his body looks perfect. Handsome. Well, just chiseled. Chiseled. But here's the problem. I've been driving recently and I've been feeling my stomach and tits shaking

in the car. You ever ride on a road that's got like a bump every few seconds? And then all of a sudden you're just like, oh, I'm just jiggling while I'm driving. This is making me feel really, it's making me feel bad about myself. Everything's a little loose.

Yeah, I was just like, I'm not talking about rumble strips. I'm talking just natural, uneven pavement that's making me shake while I'm talking just natural, uneven pavement that's making me shake while I'm driving, and I'm grossed out by myself. I'm like, I gotta tighten this all up. So I'm gonna give it a shot. What are you gonna do? Right now I'm gonna try to just eat less

and play more. Like, a lot of times when I play with my kids, I kind of facilitate the games, and I think now I'm gonna get myself more involved I want to play more. Like, a lot of times when I play with my kids, I kind of facilitate the games, and I think now I'm gonna get myself more involved. I'm gonna physically get involved. Normally, if they're like kicking a ball, you know, I don't really hustle.

I think I'm gonna start hustling. And see if I can stop my tits and stomach from shaking while I'm driving over a bridge. That bridge is where you get those seams in the road. And you're just like, oh. And when you feel it, you're just like, oh, that's not, that's new. I don't like it.

Speaking of dad bods, my buddy's on the show today. My favorite Spaniard. This, let me tell you something about today's guest. This guy has been in my life for eight years, but like every day for eight years. And my wife hated it. She was, she couldn't stand how much I, how much time I spent with him. All right, listen, the heart time I spent with him. All right. Listen, the heart wants what the heart wants.

Enjoy. My guest today has built my home in Malibu twice. Cause the first one burned down. He's a surfer, a builder, an architect and my favorite Spanish person, not yet to be deported. Please welcome Sergio. Hola, como esta? Muy bien.

Y tu señor? No. Do you believe in ghosts? I do actually. I know. Yeah. You're from Spain. Yes.

The beautiful village of, where are you from? Malaga? What is it? I was born in Malaga. Malaga. That's where we were born because my hometown is too small back in the days to have a hospital or anything like that. So we were rushed to the main city, which was Malaga. And then after a couple of days, they take you to your village, you know?

And that was Marbella. Marbella is a beautiful town. Marbella. Marbella. I actually live in another town, you know? And that was Marbella. Marbella is a beautiful town. Marbella. Marbella, between, I actually live in another town, too. It's the Bonham Marbella. They're like 10 minutes away, you know? How close to the coast is that? That's right there.

Like, I was raised right on the beach in the Mediterranean. And you could wave to the people in Africa? Yes, I could see Africa from my house, yeah. Now, you are a builder, like a manly builder. Yes, a real. A real builder. But you're also an architect. How did you get into this?

Because your father, who passed away a few years ago, a wonderful man who was the butcher in your hometown. Yeah, my family, we were butchers for, I mean, since 18 something, you know, like my great-great-grandmother was already a butcher. She was a butcher? She was the butcher of the town. Like the butcher of the town.

All the generations, up to me, I was raised in the butcher, you know, cutting meat when I was a kid. And when you're in the family of a butcher, you're kind of royalty in the town. Yeah, I mean, you have dispensary staff, you know. But every place that you went, they like treated you guys with respect, your family, because the restaurants, they would take care of you.

Yeah, I mean, Marbella ended up being like the Beverly Hills of Europe, you know, like super expensive. Didn't know that. All the celebrities will go over there, you know. And my father, specifically at that time, you know, of the butcher, And my father, specifically at that time, of the butcher, when it became really fancy, all the town, we served the meat to like people from Onassis to the Kennedys to the Yom Bord, you like tennis.

So the Yom Bord wedding, I remember as a kid, taking the meat for his wedding. Did Nadal ever get to taste your? I'm a hundred percent sure. So that was that. That was where I was raised, you know? And then all of a sudden, I told my father that I wanted to be an architect really early on.

I was eight years old. Was he upset? Or was he like, no, this is good? No, he was happy. The only thing is, kind of interesting story here, because I got my eye, I hit my eye with a rock playing with my friends, no? Accidentally.

Sounds like a hate crime. So I had a bleeding in my eye. So they had to take me to a hospital right away. And they actually flew me to Barcelona to the Barracquer eye doctor, which was one of the best still is for eye doctors in Europe, because I was losing my vision. I remember that night I arrived there and my mother is holding me. I was like six years old, seven years old, you know?

And my mother was explaining to me the building and my eyes were closed. I covered everything. And my mother was explaining me this spiral stairs and things like that. And I say to my mother at that moment that I wanted to be a builder, I mean, an architect. Not if you're gonna go blind. And my mother was like moment that I wanted to be a builder. I mean, an architect. And not if you're going to go blind.

And my mother was like, oh yeah, sure. But ended up being the barraker, fixed my eyes. And I went all over the world, studying architecture, studying architecture in Seville. You went to a fancy school here in Los Angeles too, right? Yeah, at Sci-Ark. How many tests do you have to do to become an architect? I took 10 tests.

You took 10. Yeah. I don't know. I think- How many times did you fail them? I never failed. You never failed a single test. No, never. And yet I know tons of people that take these tests. You took 10. Yeah, I don't know. How many times did you fail them? I never failed. You never failed a single test? No, never.

And yet I know tons of people that take these tests, they can't pass a single one. Yeah, I did it all in one shot. Now, I interviewed a handful of architects and then a handful of builders, and you won because you're like, hey, I just wanna surf every day with you. That was the main reason.

Everything started because you wanted to live right next to the job site. That's your nightmare, right? Yeah, this is the worst nightmare for a builder. Is to have their client live on site. Their client live on the job site. That's like a no-no. You have to understand that Sergio and I,

every day, I would spend all day with him. Like for years. For years. Just, you know, and we would, I would. Daniel, like I would be working in the job site. I had a busy morning always, no? Like with the guys, there's probably like 20, 30 guys working in the house, no?

And Daniel is like at 9 a.m., he's like testing me when I will go surfing, you know? Oh, well, those are good days when I'm in a good mood. It's better surfing than when I'm angry about stuff. And then I like, I can't go. Yeah, I have a meeting, you know, I have this and that. And then Daniel will come up, you know, with like barefoot in the job site, you know, like come on, get your shoes on, you know.

Why don't we go surf for an hour or two? Now, do you think that affected how long it took you to build my house? A little bit, obviously, you know. Why don't we go surf for an hour or two? Now, do you think that affected how long it took you to build Myel's? A little bit, obviously, you know. I mean, we're surfing. How come you can't actually predict how long projects will take? It's very complicated. There is too many things, especially, you know, we, the kind of work we do is not usually people do in construction.

We are, in the company, we are like six, seven architects. Uh-huh. We each kind of take a project. Oh, no. And we are like very focused on the, on the design on the detailing. So we go back and forth, um, trying to get the idea of the project, you know, all resolved very nicely. And it's not, there is no shortcuts, you know, as you know, I mean, your house is a masterpiece of like detailing.

No, that's not, I mean, a lot of times the project manager on a build site doesn't have the experience that you have. Yeah. I mean, that's fair, right? Yeah. I mean, when I was interviewing these guys, a lot of the project managers were a little too, I don't know what the word is, like a redneck,

a little too gruff. Yeah, yeah, real builders, yeah. Well, I don't know. It was like you just, and then you are a surfer. When did you start surfing? I was 13 years old in Portugal, first time I got in the world. But you're more of a, just so people know, you're not a traditional short boarder.

You're old school, you long board, you like to ride first point in Malibu, you like to hang 10, you like to just pose, you do your thing. We used to surf constantly, and then since you finished my job, I would argue that you have quit surfing. Kind of, but it's gonna be temporary.

It's gonna be temporary. I'm building my house now too, so I'm like super busy. You're building your house. By the way, he's building his house in an area in the mountains. It's beautiful. It's like there's not a lot built around there, but the reason that you picked this lot was one day we were at the Old Place restaurant. Just coincidentally at the same time, my wife and I, you were eating with your family

there and then my wife, what did my wife say to you? So I don't know if everybody knows the old place, it's a really tiny, beautiful Western kind of building, no, and really loud inside. And I'm talking to Carly, your wife, and you're talking to Lorena, my wife. That's the way I like it. And Carly, you know, in the middle of all this sound, she tells me,

you should find a place to live around here, you know? You know, like in the movies, they do this, like they isolate the sound, you know? And then all you're listening is that very clearly in your ears, you know? And it came right into my brain. I'm like, you know, she's right. This is where I should be living, you know. And it came right into my brain. I'm like, you know, she's right. This is where I should be living, you know. So after we have lunch in there and all that, we were leaving and instead of making a right

towards, you know, the freeway to go back to Santa Monica, I told my wife, I said, you know, why don't we make a left and see the neighborhood here? And we go make a left one block away, there's a sign for sale of an empty lot. That was in a Sunday and on Friday I own the lot. Yep. You see that you guys?

My wife manipulated another man. Another man. Absolutely. I should bring this up, Roe, your wife way too attractive for you. Agree? 100%. Ah!

It's almost confusing. Now, now, is she half Mexican, half Chinese? Yes. Ah. She's gorgeous. She's a beautiful woman. Oh. Does she ever say things to you like, hey, Sergio, why don't you,

maybe you need to? Tune it up a little bit, no? Does she ever say tune it up a little bit? Sure. She does? Yeah. Oh, all right. And I have to keep up, you know?

Okay. It's one of the difficult, when there is such a difference in beauty, let's say, you know? You gotta keep it up, you know? Well, and, but are you keeping it up? You don't look as you, for a while there, you were looking like a sea lion,

but now you're starting to get back into shape a little bit. Yeah. But you're not doing anything to get in shape, are you? No, no. Of course not. Your brother. Oof.

That's another story. Is he older or younger? He's a year and a half older. He's older than you, but yet looks 10 years younger than you. At least. And he's just sexy. And he just lives in Spain and just all the women love him. He's dangerously sexy.

Like I cannot introduce like to a happy couple. Like I'd be scared to like introduce you with your wife. You know, you have a beautiful relationship. You think he would take my wife? I think so. But the problem would be your wife. That's the problem. Uh huh.

The whole question is like what I'm doing, you know, that I cannot take be your wife. That's the problem. They're all questions like what I'm doing, that I cannot take advantage of. Maybe the Iranian lover. You wanna talk about a time my wife was infuriated with you. You might not remember. First of all, you once walked in on my wife changing. Do you remember that? Really?

You saw her completely naked, yeah. She remembers that. What happens when you're building a house and you're there all the time, you know? Uh-huh. Okay, this was a meeting that we had. The house was complete, but, you know, there was things that we were going over a punch list.

So one time we're in our bathroom, and we're having a meeting in our bathroom. Now you have to understand our bathroom is not small, and there's a separate door for the water closet for the toilet. We're having a meeting in there, me, you, and like four or five other men. And we're going over the punch list. And then about 10 minutes into the meeting, she finally just gives up and she comes out of the toilet.

She'd been in there the whole time and we were in there having a meeting. And she was so embarrassed. And so, and I got in so much trouble. I can't remember that. I was like, well, we all know what you were were in there having a meeting and she was so embarrassed and so and I got in so much trouble. I can't remember that. I was like well we all know what you were doing in there and she's like well I was she was like I she was contemplating staying but she knew this meeting was probably going to go an hour she's like so she just had to walk out and she's like you caught me. Yeah. Oh she was furious about that. She also- Those things happen.

Do you remember when she fell in the septic tank? Of course I remember that day. She fell into the septic tank. Because the whole complexity of like, we had the pool in one house, next to the construction site, you were living in that guest house, so we were in the pool and she-

We weren't in the pool, we were talking up by the pool. Yeah, but you and I were in the jacuzzi. We were in the jacuzzi? You and I were in the jacuzzi. We were in the jacuzzi? Yeah, we were in the jacuzzi talking about surfing, whatever. And your wife decided to go to the guest house and she just walked out, go to the guest house. The lid on the septic tank wasn't, it slipped out from underneath her and she felt, no, they ran it, this was a brand new septic tank that was clean and empty. But she fell up to like this and was holding herself.

She was, and she was screaming for Sergio and Daniel to come help her because she didn't have the strength. Yeah. We're in the jacuzzi. There's bubbles. We don't hear anything. And 15, 20 minutes later, she comes walking up all disheveled and says, I fell into the septic tank, she's crying. Well, in no way.

And she storms away from us. She was so mad. Like you guys, you know. And then I found out a few weeks later that she was pregnant. And that I think that's what did it. Sometimes a little shock by that helps, you know. Do you remember the time that you came back to the office

and I had filled your trailer with gay pornography? Yeah. So you come back to your office on a Monday morning and there's nothing but gay pornography all throughout your trailer. Like all those posters, you know. You still have those posters? No, no.

It was very strange because I was actually leaving to Spain that day, I think. Like I was leaving early that day. I had another guy taking my place, you know, while I was going to Spain. And so the other guy is like, what's going on in here? You say, this is how I like it. Yeah. It was like, well, if you feel uncomfortable, just take it down, you know? Oh, so you left it for him. Of course. That's nice. You remember that one time, these are like the little things I would do.

What do we always say to keep it clean? The work site clean? Todo limpio. Todo limpio. Todo limpio. That's all that's in my head forever now. I just would scream, todo limpio. Todo limpio.

Todo limpio. Todo limpio. Yes, I like to work site clean, but sometimes what I would do, I did this bit one time. I took a bandaid, a used bandaid of mine, and I had placed it somewhere on the floor in the work site. And then a moment or two later, I went and got Sergio, and then we're walking around, and then I'm like,

Sergio, look, there's like a bandaid on the ground. And I picked it up and I ate it. Yes, I remember that. And that was so weird. And you were like freaking out. You're like, don't do that. Oh God. I'm like, if you're not going to clean up, I'm going to eat these things.

Yeah. And he ate it. Well, yes, but it was my bandaid. So I was like, Oh God, these guys. Those are just the silly things we did. Now everyone who stayed behind during the Woesley fire saved their house. I couldn't because I was in Vegas doing a charity show.

What was your excuse for not saving my house? I got scared. I was, yeah, I remember that I was like, okay, I, the fire started, you were in Las Vegas and whatever. I came next day, the fire was coming closer everybody was leaving Malibu. They were a line of under PCH going towards Santa Monica like literally like yeah and I was driving the other way towards your house you know.

Do you think if we would have stayed there you and I we could have stopped it? Yes I think so. I needed you there with me. Yeah I should have, listen I was doing God's work, but you just started the very next day cleaning up. I've got photos of you in a hazmat suit, just the next day. We didn't even wait for permits, and they, by the time we had cleaned up,

they were like, hey, do you guys have a permit to clean this up? And we're like, we're done. Most of the workers that build your homes are Mexican. Yes. Do they treat you differently because you're from Spain or no? I have the best relationship with the workers.

Best relationship. I always take care of them a lot. I take it very serious. I love them. I mean, well, there's so many of these guys that I got to meet now I see them on other job sites. Yeah, so I just yell at them, you know Whenever I see him and we have a good time the concrete guys. They're intense. Yeah. Oh, I love those guys the framing people I don't care much about framing guys concrete framing people. They always just make mistakes

You build houses and then you're just like people like oh like, oh yeah, yeah, we know that's wrong. We'll fix that later. I'm like, oh Jesus. How many times have you, you've been mad and we've been in screaming fights? You know, we had our things, but it's such an intimate relationship. I mean, I'm building in your house, you know, inside where you basically are all the time. Where I'm pooping. Where you're pooping and you have your-

You ever seen me poop outside and I get the beach? You have so many problems. Yeah. Do the people know this? Like he has this, he can panic if he doesn't have a toilet clothes, you know? Yeah. Many times we are like getting ready to go surfing,

you know, and I put my sweat suit on, everything, I'm ready to go in the golf cart. And then we're like, okay, we're going to go. And then all of a sudden it's like, Daniel turns pale, you know, sorry, I gotta go. I gotta go. I mean, he just ran to the toilet, you know? Yeah. And I'm waiting and waiting for him.

And then finally he comes back like, because he gets scared, like we're going to go for two hours far away from a toilet, you know? No, the ocean is a huge toilet for me. One time we went surfing and you cut your foot, like a, you know, whatever. Like two inches, no? It was not a big cut.

Yes. All right, he had a- Not cut, oh my God. It doesn't matter. Half of it. What's the- The skin, it's cause you don't ever lube, you don't scrub your feet,

you have too much dead skin down there. Anyway, it was a big cut. Fine. I'll let you have that. But what I'm not gonna let you have is the rest of the story. You weren't feeling well and you're like, can I? And I said, I'll just give you two Tylenol.

Two extra strength Tylenol. That's it. Nothing fancy. He starts- He tried to kill me. He starts freaking out. He goes, what did you give me? And I said, oh, uh, two Tylenol. And he goes, let me see, let me see the box.

And I give him the box and it says extra strength on it. And he goes, it says extra strength. I don't take drugs. I don't take drugs. And he starts gagging himself. He starts gagging himself. And like he had taken some poison to make himself vomit to get the pills up, which he eventually did.

Oh my God. Yes. He had never taken Tylenol before, which doesn't do anything anyway. Yeah. I don't take those things, you know, but you give me two, it's wasn't overdose. That's what you did. Before you met me, had you ever heard of me before? No. Well, that doesn't mean anything.

I don't watch the TV too. No, that doesn't mean anything. It's just very insulting. No, well, it's not. I don't know anything. Have you ever seen one of my shows? Little bit, yeah. Not really.

It's not your cup of tea. We hang out for seven or eight years. He's like, I'm not gonna watch you. You're awful. I think you're very, very funny. I laugh with you so much. Where would you rank my house in the projects that you've done?

I think it's the best, you know? It's the best I've ever done. Well, that's nice to hear. I guess because I had to do it two times. So the second time was- Well, you had to do the main house twice, but we didn't- No, but the way is detailed, very good architecture, you know. And you modeled your home after my guest house.

Many, yes. Many ideas, I have to say, you know, I have the privilege of working with the best architects and the best clients too that they care about design. So you just steal their ideas? Little bit, you know. Okay. We all do that. Okay, and then, and also speaking of stealing,

how many things on your project right now for your home that you're building were actually at one point ordered for my house? They're gonna take me to jail now. No, no, no. I'm the one that would have to say that there's a problem. I would be like, no, no, I didn't need that. But then all of a sudden I see it.

I go to your place and look at stuff and I go, hey, that looks familiar. Yeah, you're gonna see a lot coming. Sometimes my tile, my concrete tiles, I'm like, you're like, you need to order more. And I'm like, are you sure that doesn't seem like that? And you say, no, no, you need more. And then-

I measure how much I need. And then I- And then sure enough, what one of your bathrooms is gonna have my same tile? I'm gonna put, for example, I have many tiles for you, but I have for your kitchen tile, those cement tiles that are so gorgeous. That's gonna go, for sure in my ADU, I'm going to make a wall out of that.

A wall. Yeah. On my, on my kitchen there. I like that. And it's kind of amazing. And I have some more leftovers that I'm going to see where I'm going to put it. Then I have other tiles that I, you know, I'm going to use the main house. I saw a door that took off.

Yeah. I have a whole door, my pedestrian door of the garage. Right. And that makes, it makes sense that you used it on a garage. Where we had it was in a powder room, and it made it look like it was at a detective office because it was like smoked glass. You hated it, you hated it.

And I was like, Carly and I were like, not a fan. I got toilets too. You got toilets for me? Yeah. Not the fancy one. The fancy one, I don't know. You did get the fancy one. Yeah.

It's like a $5,000 toilet. That's not my fancy one then. No, well, the real fancy one. Yeah. It's like a $5,000 toilet. That's not my fancy one then. No, well, the real fancy one that came later. Yes. Well, I have the one that you didn't like it. You didn't like it. No, because it left poop stains every time you went. I know.

You know, it's like, okay. What are you gonna do with that? It's okay. Oh, your wife is gonna hate you for that one. You remember this story? Huh. Like, I think you were in town or something, I don't know, you were working, traveling or something.

And it's like, Dennis like calling me, he's like, Sergio, can you go and poop on my toilet? Mm-hmm. And take a picture after you flush it. Okay, because I wanted to make sure that she was clean. She did a stain, you know? Like it really flushes well, you know? No, this is like, okay. And like on the job site, okay guys, I'm gonna poop in here, you know. This is like, okay.

I'm like on the job side, okay guys, I'm going to poop in here, you know. You don't have to tell them. You can just go. Nobody's asking you. Was I a relatively easy person to work with? Yeah. Really? I think.

Oh, I didn't think you were going to say that. Well, it's like everything, but a builder likes to be pumper, you know, like, like, and you are very good at that. Like you- Oh, pampering? Yeah, pampering. Like, like take me out for incredible lunches. Remember those?

Oh, yeah, back when I was trying to speed you up a little bit. Remember the seafood? We got lobsters and everything. Uh-huh. Yeah. And like that kind of thing, you know, we, builders love that, you know, that kind of treatment. I know. But now I can't even get you to hang out.

You're just gone all the time. Pierre, my French friend, you competitive with Pierre? You like Pierre or you hate Pierre? Well, it's the relationship between Spain and France. Who's got better food, Spain or France? Spain. It's not even close? Not even close, yeah.

Art, who's better at art though? I mean, Velasquez, Goya, you name it. Picasso. Picasso, where's he from? Miró. Picasso's from my hometown. I was born like two blocks away from him. Two blocks away from Picasso.

Comedy, who does comedy better? Spain, France, or the United States? Spain is great. I don't know, is there a comedy scene in Spain? Oh yeah. Yeah? Basically in the South of Spain. Oh the South, yeah the South.

We are having fun all the time. If you're from the South of Spain, they know that you're like almost like a comedian, you know? Oh. Because we're always having fun, laughing about everything. Who's better builders? Absolutely Spain. I mean, we have one. Who's better builders? Absolutely Spain. I mean, we have one of the best architectures in the world.

You love architecture. Yeah. That's my passion, yeah. A famous architect went to your wedding, true? Yeah, yeah. Michael Rotondi, he was one of the founders of Morphosis. And more than anything, he was the director of CyArk for 10 years.

And he was crucial educator for many architects in Los Angeles and in the world, incredible teacher. Who is the greatest architect of all time? Ms. van der Rohe. Who's that? He was an architect from Germany that later on came into the United States. He did the Siggerns building in Manhattan. Okay. architect from Germany that later on came into the United States. He did the Siggurans building in Manhattan.

Okay. And many other ones, including the Barcelona pavilion, beautiful little building. He's an architect that understood repetition, symmetry, and also being able to kind of stop time, and it makes this contemplation images of the landscape, this framing of the landscape at the Frank Lloyd Wright in Chicago. What's the deal with Frank Lloyd Wright? Well, he's-

Do I have to care about him? Absolutely. Okay. There is one very interesting building by Frank Lloyd Wright is the Guggenheim Museum in Manhattan, in New York. Well, I don't know if you've seen it. It's like a spiral.

You come up in the elevator and then you see the gallery. It's all about time. It's time moving through space. How can I explain it to you, Daniel? You can't. It's like, you know the Disney concert hall? No. The little flower like that with the stainless steel?

That's the complete opposite of the Guggenheim Museum in New York. It's about space. It's about space coming, opening up. LA is all about space. Guggenheim Museum is about time. Time is way more important in art. Okay.

Guys, you're getting a glimpse of what my days were like. Every day when my house was being built, where I would ask like, hey, how come this bathroom wall isn't finished yet? And then he would go on a 45 minute conversation about time and space. And I would just be like, all right. What architect do you think is overrated or do you not like?

Is there buildings or homes, oh, I can't stand their work, or do you just not say that because it's not good for business? No, I don't care. But you know, I don't know, it's hard to, like I just don't, I can tell you architects that I like. The Japanese guy that works only in concrete,

you think he's a genius, right? Tada Wando from Japan. I'm not into it think he's a genius, right? Tadao Ando from Japan. I'm not into it. It's just pure, just concrete blocks. I'm like, ugh. That's too- For me, it's very, very good. Oh yeah, it's very monolithic.

I love monolithic. You love things that look monolithic. You're always like, look at this. I'm from South Spain, and we have- We know, you've said it a hundred times. Like the Alhambra, you know, where this is like the ultimate monolithic walls, you know, sitting on the landscape. Where are you at on brutalist architecture?

It's good. Architecture should be kind of brutal because a building should be made to stand the time. This is what I enjoy when I go to Spain or the Humbra or I went to Rome and I see buildings that have been up for 2,000 years and they look more beautiful. Wait, what's the architect that invented that slide in that city in Spain where everybody gets hurt? Do you know what I'm talking about?

Yeah, it wasn't designed by an architect, that's for sure. It's the most dangerous slide you've ever seen in his town. Yeah, like, well, they had to shut it off, like, during the opening. Well, yeah, grandmas and children were going 300 miles an hour down this huge slide. There is a change of height, you know, from one street high up to the lower street, and the developer of that area, together with the politicians and say, why don't we do a slide, you know, so I get to build all these units, you know, and then I build you this park with a slide that goes all the way to the other street down there.

The day of the opening, the whole town is there, pressed up, you know, and they, they say, okay, it's open, you know, and they start people throwing themselves through the slide and they just like, wow, wow, people breaking the legs, burning because it was like a stainless steel, burning the whole leg. It was a disaster, so they had to stop it. That's very good. What is flamenco?

In music, there is a few hotspots for music in the world. Okay. Flamenco is very, because it's very deep. It's like in America, the blues, you know, but the blues, like the blues that they play just with the hands, maybe like really like slavery blues, you know. I guess. I'm not really familiar with the hand slavery blues. It came up from Africa, no?

I mixed with European, like the gypsy coming from Romania and that created the flamenco. Do you listen to it often? All the time. Every time I listen to your music, whatever you're listening to, it's just the worst club music, like Ibiza. No, no, no.

You love that club music. Yeah, yeah, well, no, but this is not what I listen. No, but you do rock out to some clubs music. Yeah, of course, yeah. What do you mean, of course? That's, you're always like, listen to this song. For us it's like, like, well, I kind of pump it up a little bit when I see you because I know you make fun of me.

What's your thoughts on Gazpacho? Gazpacho, Andaluz, no? It's from my region of Spain. I don't care Sergio, do you like it? Or do you love it? I love it. But, okay, here's the ingredients are very important. I have the privilege of my brother growing his own veggies for the gazpacho in the summer.

That's why his body's so good. He grows his own veggies. His top body. veggies for the gazpacho in the summer. Oh, that's why his body's so good. He grows on veggies. And so when I go there, I mean, the tomatoes he grows, it's called balls of the bull because they're like hanging like that. They're really large and incredible flavor, no acidity. And it's just, that's a perfect tomato to do the gazpacho. My wife makes gazpacho using cherry tomatoes.

She needs a little explanation on that. I'm teasing. I don't know. No, she does. She actually hates gazpacho. But he would admit Italy has better tomatoes. Yes, well, the tomato is more from the South. The salmorejo is from the South, from where I am, no?

So your tomatoes are comparable to Italy's tomatoes? Way better than Italy's. I didn't see that coming. I didn't see that coming. Don't even get me started on sardines, you know? Oh, I don't care that much about sardines. You haven't been in, you haven't ate the sardines from my town. You're very proud of Spain.

You have a lot of pride in your country. Very, very proud. You know, I think it's the best country in the world. But now you are no longer allowed to go back. Is that true? I can go there any time I want. You have dual citizenship. You became, when did you become a citizen in the U S? Maybe like 15 years ago. 15 years ago.

But I can go back and forth. I have my kids too. You go back usually every summer and you pull one of the craziest husband moves I've ever, ever witnessed. You have your wife and your two kids go ahead of you, fly to Spain, and then you go two weeks later. So you get two weeks to be by yourself here and you don't have to travel with the children. Now, now your kids are a little bit older,

but back in the day when they were just babies, you were like, no, no, she does the flight by herself. She goes for two and a half months with the kids. I know. And I only go three weeks. So I get all that by myself here. What's the best region in Spain? Andalufia.

Is that where you're from? Well, yes, that's where I'm from, but I'm biased, no? No, you're very biased. Every region is very different. It's hard to pick one because you're not, you don't have apples to apples. Everything is just so different. But I'm from the south and that's kind of like, you know, obviously where I like the things from the south.

I like the people from the south. I like the food. I like the things from the South. I like the people from the South. I like the food. I like the flamenco. You know, Pete is now a resident and bought property in Spain. Well, through his wife and his wife's sister lives there full-time. So now he feels like he is a local in Spain.

It's probably the best move. What region do you live in, Pete? Asturias. Asturias. Asturias, you hate that? Pete? Asturias. Asturias. Asturias. You don't, you hate that? I love Asturias. Oh, you love it.

Picos de Europa. Well, okay. I mean, the quality of the food there, it's not comparable to anything in the planet. I mean, on the whole planet. I'm talking about, for example, the Cabrales cheese, you know, from there, from the mountains of the Picos de Europa, is the most expensive cheese in the world. It's like a little cheese this big, like a four pound.

It's $25,000. $25,000. For a little cheese that Shepherd makes in the middle of the mountain. Oh, I'm gonna make a quesadilla for my kids with that cheese. This is what I'm talking about. The beef, I mean, the beef is Asturias.

It's good. Very close to Asturias, it's Leon. And Leon has the number one beef restaurant in the world. Shocking. Yeah. You sound like Trump, just always talking about like, but like you're like the Spaniard version, just the number one. Everything is the number one.

The seafood over there, I mean, you can just, you don't need to go anywhere else in the world. Once you get used to the food there and you go somewhere else, you know that you're going to eat horrible, you know? Should I buy one of these houses that's $1 in Spain? Do they have, are those offered in Spain? Yeah. You know what I'm talking about.

Up in the hills in the middle of nowhere. If you buy them for $1, but then you have to agree to renovate them and stuff like that. 100% recommend it. You do? Yeah. Oh brother.

That's gonna cost me, isn't it? There's actually a lot of people doing this now in Spain. It's just going far away in the middle of the country. Do you think you'll ever move back there permanently or no? Yes. You think you will? Yeah. Interesting.

I have to figure it out, you know, but I can't, you know, just be here. I miss Spain a lot. Why not have two places, a place there and a place here? Yes, that's fine. That's okay. But I have to go more than a month a year. You know what I mean?

Like I have to spend. Well, you're gonna, once your youngest son, you know, we're talking about 10 years from now. Yeah, yeah. I need to, yeah 10 years from now. Yeah. Yeah. I need him out. Yeah. Yeah. It's not, I gotta get him out.

No. How big is your paella pan? Well, mine, you haven't seen my new one. You got a new paella pan. Yes. I'm going to point out. Mine's pretty big. It's pretty big.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I can feed like easily like 20 people. 20 people. Yeah. It has a three ring burner with independent so I can control everything. One time you were telling me like we have to do paella.

We have to do paella. I'm like fine, we'll do it. And then you're like, okay, I don't actually know how to do it. I have a friend that does my paella for me. And you're going to like made you're going to bring another guy to my house to cook for me. No, I'm not inviting another member. So then you're like, no, no, okay, fine.

I'll do it. So then in Tahoe, you came. You always talked about the thing that's the most important paella is being level. Everything has to be level. Very important. So when you have it level, the liquid, it's the same amount, so the rice will cook evenly. If you are off a little bit,

there is more water and more dry in another area. So the rice is not going to cook at the same. You don't season it enough is what I'd like to say. Season? Like this, like it's the paella you put like saffron. And, and. I still have some of the fancy seasonings you gave us. Yeah.

Well, the pimenton, you know, I give Danny when you've finished the house finally, like I give you a little paella. I know. And then my wife made paella one time and you stood next, don't get mad. You stood next to her and you critiqued her for over an hour. And she was losing her mind. She couldn't handle you just telling her what she was doing wrong for over an hour.

Well, the problem, okay. I think I know what happened actually. She took a recipe for 15 people and put it in a little pan, a paella pan that I gave you for like three and a half people. Ah, her proportions were wrong. Yeah. So she- The rice needs to be thin. So when, you know, when I, when I got, I remember when I got there to your

house that day, Amanda comes to me and says, Sergio, Sergio, you know, Carly is cooking paella for you. You know, like what? Yeah. Yeah. But you know, I'm like, okay. So, you know, I go over there and I see her cooking my paella pan, a mountain of rice. She was not cooking a mountain of rice in your paella.

I'm like, Oh my God, what is that? She said, I'm making a paella for you. You know, like a paella, but look at this. This is like, you know, this rice here for like, I don't know. You can't cook it like that. Her proportions were off. That's what you're saying. So she took a recipe that I think my wife gave her to her,

or I don't know, when she learned, when I cook it in taho or whatever, and she put all that into a little pan. That's no good. No, no, no. It was like some kind of Chinese rice or something like that. Huh?

You know, one time my wife cooked for your family and she made Mexican food and your wife says to my wife, you know, as a Mexican woman says, oh, this is so many flavors. That's what she said. So many flavors. I'm like, why would you cook Mexican food for a Mexican woman? I mean, maybe she meant it as a compliment, but I don't think she did. Um, I don't remember that.

This was in, this was in Tahoe. Oh, in Tahoe. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And gelatos or something like that.

And your wife was just like, yeah, I remember that now. Yeah. Yeah. That was, didn't cut it. Yeah. Now, do you take naps every day? Yes. That doesn't.

You know, because you've seen me sleeping in the car. That's right. You did used to take, you used to go out to your car and take naps. I take it every day. It doesn't matter. I cannot do, I cannot function without it. How long do you nap for?

Usually just two hours? I've done it all my life in Spain. I can't change it. Those are kind of things that are a problem in my brain. I eat lunch and I fall asleep. I mean, I'm with you. Fall asleep. Not resting, like fall asleep, completely. I know. I do the asleep. I mean, I'm with you. Fall asleep, not resting, like fall asleep completely.

I know, I do the same thing. Do you remember how young you looked when you started working at my house? Yeah. Oh, we both aged. Yeah. We both aged. I was single.

I'm coming back now. I'm coming back. You're not coming back, it's over. Hey, everybody's on the show, get some gifts. So let's start giving you some gifts. That's the reason I came. I know. By the way, where'd you get that shirt

that you're wearing right now? This is a famous comedian gave it to me. I've always given him clothes. Sergio is one of the people that gets my clothes first dibs. He also is like, for a builder, you're pretty bougie. Yes. You care about brands. Like sometimes he would see something on me,

he goes, oh, I like that brand very much. I'm like, oh, okay. And then he would tell me, he goes, I've got a hookup in Palm Desert at the James Purse outlet store, and she hides the good stuff that comes into the outlet store, lets me know, and then I go out there,

and I get to buy a bunch of stuff. Yeah. Okay, here, for a couple things here, there's some nice sweaters for you. You like sweaters? This is Vince, you'll like him. Yeah, this is beautiful. Oh yeah, you'll like that.

Oh, this is totally in. Uh-huh. Yeah, it's got fun pockets to it. And it's got a, here's another sweater. Yo, let's see, that one has a hood. Do you wear hoods ever? Yeah. I didn't think so, but don't take your coaster.

Yeah, maybe my. You'll like it. Now you have tiny feet. Not really. Man, it's for a man, for a builder that's small. No, no, no, excuse me. You have strangely big feet. Yes, well okay.

But your son, your son has man feet. Yes. He's using, he's got like three or four pairs. Okay now. He's using that. Now I'm gonna blow his mind. Now I'm gonna blow his mind. This is gonna be for your son. Oh this is gonna be for your son. He's gonna love that. Oh yes. We're just gonna give your son every, look at these shoes. These are, some of these have never been worn. Yeah I know. Look at these. Oh he's gonna love all these shoes. He's gonna love these. Incredible. Look at these shoes these are some of these have never been worn yeah I know this look at these oh he's gonna love all these shoes he's gonna love incredible look at these shoes oh my good oh my god oh my some of those some dirt on there you know you see like this is too big look at this these shows say Tosh point oh on him Adidas made me a pair that said touch my all right all

these shoes no there might be 40 pairs of shoes in there. Get that off my desk. Go ahead and put that over there. You can keep the bag too. I'm not done giving you stuff, but get this off my desk so we can get to the next set of gifts. Get that sweater off my desk too, please. There's rocks on this table.

That interview was so worth it. Hold on. Next, next gift I have for you. I don't know why I found this today. It... I know that. because you changed the model. I changed the model. So I want you for your house. I don't know if I can use that, but yeah, I'll try.

Yeah, this is a, uh, yep. This was in your, in the little closet. I remember leaving this in there. Well, now you're taking it back. It's an intercom. Really beautiful. It's really beautiful. I always thought about taking it, but you know, no.

No. Hey, it's good. I always thought about taking it. All right, so you can take this intercom. Cause I want, that's nice. If you don't use it, that's fine. What else do I got for you? I don't know what these things are,

but you left them. I don't want them. Yeah, that's a zip wall. Yeah, this is great. Here's some zip walls. This is like when we have to put temporary walls. Yeah. Well, I've never used those so I don't know why they're my house I use it in your house. Actually here take this what is oh, no. No, that's no that's no mine. I don't care It was left in my work site. It's got a dry creed in it. Like whatever that dry cement stuff Get a quick dry quick dry, whatever it is.

You know, don't open it in here. It's nasty, man. It's nasty. He said that is not mine. How many photos are in your phone? Oh, I don't even know. You don't do you? I want to know. 69,000.

69,000? Yeah. I just, no one takes more photos than you. And then like, I'll call you and I'll have a problem at my house and I'll be like, Hey, do you have photos? I need to know if it's a straight shot from the telephone pole to, I need to know if this conduit is a straight or if there's a junction box. And you're like, hold on.

And you scroll through 69,000 photos and you're like, I think it's a straight shot. It's a straight shot. You're good. Explain your plan to get, of Wilshire Boulevard, a major road that runs the entire length of Los Angeles and turn it only into a pedestrian road. Los Angeles has a couple of problems. One is the public space is a disaster.

You know, like we don't have a good public space. Like you go to any European cities and you see a plaza or something like that, it's so active. Here, plazas are half empty, parks are 100% empty. And the reason, there is a reason, is because everybody has a park in their home, backyard and front yard. We have so much open space.

Los Angeles is a very low density city. And when we make a park, it's not relevant, you know, for the urbanistic. It's just another empty space, you know. It's the opposite of Manhattan and the Central Park, you know. Over there, it's relevant. You need that because you have so much density. So every time we try to do an open space here

in Los Angeles, it's very difficult. So I think what needs to be done is create open space and parks like a transportation system. Los Angeles is designed based on freeways and based on moving through space for long distances. You know, we love commute. If you stay home one day and you don't commute, not you, but two hours, most of the people get nervous. Oh, I didn't drive for two hours today.

You know why? Because we have problem on us just moving through space, through freeways, you know? And everything is so thin, everything is far away. So a park has to be designed with that logic where we connect big distances, like Santa Monica to downtown. Literally, it's a linear park, a linear freeway of pedestrians and, and also

bicycles, electric bicycles now that completely change the distances. You know, like we are from Santa Monica to downtown. I think we are like maybe, um, 12 miles away. You still got that rad wagon. I got you. I love it. You still got it. wagon I got you. I love it. You still got it? Oh yeah.

But your kids are huge now, so you don't need that. Yeah, we still get all of us on top. No you don't. Yes, we do. What? It's incredible. You're in Bobby or something like that. Yes, yes.

Yes. Anyway, I think Los Angeles, especially now with the Olympics, I'm from Spain, so we went through the Olympics in Barcelona, and we transformed the whole city. Are you excited for the Olympics to come here? Well, yes, but I don't think we're doing enough. Who are you going to cheer for?

Spain. But if Spain is not playing... Traitor. And U.S. wins, I'm happy. Oh, what about in soccer? Who will you go for? Spain, that's not major. You know, that's not, that's not the negotiate rule. Did you overcharge me? No, it's just, it's the things that it costs, you know, like, like to do things right and to redo,

many things would redo many times, you know, and it's just, that's up, you know. You didn't overcharge me? You did. No, you didn't. All right, Sergio, thank you for being on the show I tell thank you. I hope your son fits into all the shoes and I can't wait for you to finish your new home Yes, thank you Daniel for having me. This is a pleasure a strong hands I

Want to thank Sergio for being on the show and I want to thank Sergio for building my home. I love my house. Oh I'd hate to sell it, but I will You give me the right offer I'll kick my family out of there tonight Carl you know what to do now a couple updates from people that have been on the show a couple your favorites our Barclay marathons Runner this year John Kelly guess what what didn't finish? Oh, man. He finished three loops three of the five loop No one finished this year's course. They made it harder, too hard.

You know why? Why? Because last year a woman finished and they're like, well, we can't have this. We can't let, if women are finished in the race. So anyway, they made it a lot harder this year. John finished three loops. Congratulations. You finished two thirds of the race.

That's just a funny race to be in. Yeah. Hey, I was in a race. How'd you do? No one finished. No. All right. Darrell, the ex NFL player that's now a chef.

Remember he was sniffing around. Remember he's kicking the tires on the show, asking me parenting stuff? Yeah. Ah, guess what? They're expecting their first child. Come on. Good job, buddy.

Nice job. Oh man, he fucked up. My wife's best friend Jocelyn, Dr. Jocelyn, who's been on the show, she's still pregnant and she's keeping the baby. Oh, come on. Mm-hmm, gonna be a little girl. Isn't that sweet?

All right, let's get to the plugs. What do we got? ToshShowStore.com, Eddie's Tour. Where, Eddie? Eddie, you're gonna be in Austin. Tomorrow night. Wow. Cap City.

Man, that brings back some memories. I know it's a new location from the one that we used to do. Yep. But memories nonetheless. Oh, I used to have a nice Austin friend. She worked at the Yellow Rose. Oh man. Oh, I miss her. every day I think of her

Then you got my tour this summer in the Midwest also on sale this week is some NorCal locations on Monterey Santa Cruz San Francisco Central Cal if you will or nor Cal if whatever. Let's do the free plug, hit the free plug music. Now that's good church music right there. Hosanna, all right. What are we free plugging? Iowa's most popular bacon festival. And one of the oldest and largest bacon festivals

in the world is returning to the Iowa state fairgrounds, uh, this May 3rd, the 17th blue ribbon bacon festival organizers will transform the agricultural building into a bacon boat for a yacht rock themed bacon extravaganza. And aside from all things bacon, there will be live music from Southern California's very own yachtachty by Nature. Come on. Yep. This event will feature unlimited bacon samples

for all attendees. Is Bako's welcomed or no? Oh, that's good. I don't know. They're probably not welcomed. It's not real bacon, you know, in Bako's. I used to love putting those on my salad. Anyway, that's not part of this.

The event will feature a renowned bacon eating contest. Jesus Christ. Is that just how much bacon you can eat? Or like, is there, you know. Here it is. A style of bacon. You ever had raw bacon at a sushi place? Ah, no.

Yeah, you probably shouldn't order that. The first contestant to eat 10 strips of bacon without throwing up or losing any large pieces will win a hundred dollars. Ten strips? That's that's something on that's on the Denny's menu. That actually that line might be taken from a Denny's menu. You also get a trophy and some Lipitor. Ah Lipitor's probably that's not real. I'm just joking about that Unless Lipitor is a sponsor the bacon festival, which those that those things would pair up nicely

Anyway, if you think you can defeat defeat Ryan Ploo who has won the last two Get over to blue ribbon bacon festival comm ASAP to fill out your entry form because only 12 lucky to fill out your entry form because only 12 lucky pork tripis, tripis, trisipitans, how do you say it? Participants. Only 12 people get to compete. That's at 315 and doors open at 11, but make sure you're there by 1. Oh God, so many numbers.

For the presentation of the 2025 bacon queen. Oh That'd be kind of cool the bacon queen if you were dating somebody you found out they were the bacon queen Isn't every woman's dream in Iowa to wear a sash with bacon queen on it? I think so I wonder if you have to be born into that Tickets to a porkabalooza are $29 for general admission Tickets to a porkabalooza are $29 for general admission Which I mean 29 bucks not a bad deal if you're if you if you say to yourself Well, I'm gonna at least eat $10 worth of bacon today, right? Yeah, cuz now now you're talking about just paying $19 to hang out

If you're willing to spend $49 for the VIP ticket You will get the koozie plus a pastry to build up your bacon eating base And a one-hour early entry into the festival. All right. Oh, that means you're gonna get to get the good bacon the crispy strips. Yep My wife always orders bacon extra crispy everywhere we go and I'm always just like It's just stop Just let them make the bacon the way they want to make it I get it if you're at a gross place and it's just rubbery, but... Extra crispy please? Oh, okay. My grandma here wants to have, you know, no taste, just some chard.

I wonder if I'm allowed to bring my pig to this bacon festival. Ooh! I wonder if that's considered cruel, this is a 21 and up event. What? That's nonsense. Children love bacon. Why is this 21 and up? I don't know. I, if I would have known it was 21 and up at the beginning, I might

not have plugged them so well. All right. The Iowa state fairgrounds located at 3000 East Grand Avenue in Des Moines, Iowa. Stay crispy. See you guys next week.