Tosh Show - My Haunted House Expert - Chris Stafford

Episode Date: October 22, 2024

Daniel sits down with scare attraction expert Chris Stafford, who has spent the better part of his career building the largest Halloween live event company in the world.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hey, Beau. Hey, Matt. Are you ready to tell the readers about the extra special episode we have coming up? I think we have to let them in on our little surprise. Yeah, if you haven't already figured it out, the queen of Christmas herself, can't believe this, Mariah Carey, will be joining us this week. Wow. Readers, publishers, caties, and finalists, tune in to maybe the most

unforgettable episode of Lost Culture Eastus yet. Listen to Lost Culture Eastus on Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. On Thanksgiving Day 1999, five-year-old Cuban boy Elian Gonzalez was found off the coast of Florida. And the question was, should the boy go back to his father in Cuba? Mr. Gonzalez wanted to go home, and he wanted to take his son with him. Or stay with his relatives in Miami?

Imagine that your mother died trying to get you to freedom. Listen to Jess Peace, the Elian Gonzalez story, on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Stick to sports. Shut up and dribble. Despite what some people believe, sports and politics have mixed from the beginning. Now you have a podcast that isn't afraid to explore the complicated relationship between sports and politics with a new podcast called Spolitics with me Jamel Hill I'll be discussing political social and economic issues through the lens of sports with some of the biggest names and smartest people

So here's the assignment listen to Spolitics on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcast Let's get Spolitical if I was in a haunted house and all of a sudden, like I go into one around a corner and I'm walking in like three inches of muddy water, that would infuriate me. I don't like, some haunted houses incorporate water effects. I'm not a big fan of those. Yeah, I don't wanna get wet. Yeah, me either.

I don't wanna feel moisture. Exactly. Every time, in a dark room. Tosh show. Tosh show. Tosh show. Hello and welcome to Tosh show. I'm your host, Dan Tosh. Eddie. How's it going Tosh man? Man, it's long and plump and ready to pump Okay. Yeah, huh?

Give her say that one back in high school. Never said that that one must have slipped through the vernacular in my school I used to say that I used to say it every day My teacher big how you doing? I'm long and plump and ready to pump and she's like, that's my boy Adults oh and ready to pump and she's like, that's my boy. To adults, it's crazy. Oh man, good times at astronaut high school. I'm in a good mood because I've almost fulfilled all the horrible parent obligations for Halloween. Which is one more. I just have one more to do and that is trick or treating.

Which I always thought was the only thing we had to do. You know, then I had a family and my wife's like, you know, we got to go to Underwood Farms. Oh, what is that? It's a place about an hour away, pumpkin patch. They got some rides. If you call them rides, a slide. You feed a couple animals, you give them way too much money for gourds. You sweat. The temperature of my house, nice 70 degrees, get there, 92. Lovely. Speaking of that, we were up in Tahoe the week before and my wife's like, oh, let's

go on over to this place called Apple Hill. They've got tons of fall festival things going on. You get apple pies, there's an orchard, you walk around. First of all, I go, okay, how far away is it? Oh, two hours and 10 minutes. What? Basically went to Sacramento. Fucking horrible. I don't, you don't live in Tahoe and vacation in Sacramento.

That's absurd. But we did it. We drove there and sure enough, it was boiling, 98 degrees out. Oh, this is super fall. I bought a turnover, had a turnover and two apple cinnamon donuts. That was all right.

Then we just like hopped around from bad orchard to bad orchard. There's a bunch of old obese. I mean, I shouldn't care about the size, but there was just a lot of old obese people. And me and my young family just, yeah, we're here too. Made no sense. Bees, yellow jackets everywhere.

Just, I'm like, this is awful. Let's get back in the car. That two hour drive back to the beautiful place we live. So you're four and a half hours in the car that day. So go get a turnover. I don't know. I don't get it. What's the next thing I did?

Knights of the Jack. That's up in Calabasas. Yeah, that I don't mind. It's at night and you get a, there's a bunch of food trucks and then you walk a mile and a half loop in this park and they've set up all kinds of Halloween lights. Kids seem to enjoy it. I don't mind it because I get to eat. As long as I'm eating, I'm happy. Just like that's the key. You like Halloween, don't you, Eddie? I do like Halloween. Yeah, because you sold your soul to the devil. I sold my soul to the devil.

Do you dress up? I don't dress up. I do decorate the house. You decorate the house. But you hand candy out? Hand out candy, yep. Are you proud of the candy you give, or do you not care? No, I do.

I get five nice bags at Costco. Good size candy bars. We have a ton of people come through. My manager, Christie Smith, just loves to brag that I give out whole bars. Last year I gave out 374. Who cares? I turn the lights off at our house. And we go to another neighborhood where it's more congested and you knock it out. You do one street, you hit 300 homes. I've never once been home to hand out candy. You don't understand this side of this. Yeah, I don't get it.

I don't get it, and I don't care. Anyway, my son's good for about 45 minutes, maybe an hour, of actual trick or treating. And we started at five o'clock and by six we're done. Now he likes to be scared, but you know, five year old scared. Where I hide in the house and he comes running around a corner and I scream

and he almost falls over. I don't think he's ready for like a severed head to be thrown at him like today's guest. This guy, this guy is cashed in on America's love affair of being terrified. Enjoy. Hey, Bo. Hey, Matt. Are you ready to tell the readers about the extra special episode we have coming up? It's raining. Yes. It's pouring. I see.

So, but you can do that kind of spooky scary. Well, yeah, but it's also because it's a ride. Yeah, I know. Up and down on it. But you're in it, you know? Yeah, exactly. You're in the spook. I think we have to let them in on our little surprise.

Yeah, if you haven't already figured it out, can't believe this. Mariah Carey will be joining us this week. I say, oh, I want to go work with such and such from across town. Yeah, from across town. My girl across town. Yeah, across town. I know a guy across town.

I know a guy. Readers, publicists, Katie's, and finalists, tune in to maybe the most unforgettable episode of Lost Cult Eastus yet. There's one more question which I promised myself I would ask. Can you drop that grunge album? I'm so mad that I haven't done that yet. But you don't have to be mad because you're in control.

I am, but who do I drop it with? Should we start a label? Maybe. Wow. Listen to Lost Culture Eastus on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. On Thanksgiving Day 1999, a five-year-old boy floated alone in the ocean. He had lost his mother trying to reach Florida from Cuba.

He looked like a little angel. I mean, he looked so fresh. And his name, Elian Gonzalez, will make headlines everywhere. Elian Gonzalez. Elian, Elian. Elian Gonzalez. Elian.

Elian Gonzalez. At the heart of the story is a young boy and the question of who he belongs with. His father in Cuba. Mr. Gonzalez wanted to go home and he wanted to take his son with him. Or his relatives in Cuba. Mr. Gonzalez wanted to go home and he wanted to take his son with him. Or his relatives in Miami. Imagine that your mother died trying to get you to freedom.

At the heart of it all is still this painful family separation. Something that as a Cuban, I know all too well. Listen to Chess Piece, the Elian Gonzalez story, as part of the MyCultura podcast network available on the iHeart radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Immigration, reproductive rights, why former first lady Michelle Obama will never run for president, affordable housing, exactly the type of discussions you'd expect on a sports podcast, am I right? Only if you listen to Spolitx, a new sports and political podcast hosted by me, Jemele

Hill, a sports journalist who has spent years writing about and discussing the intersection between sports, politics, race, gender, and culture. Join me every Thursday as I discuss, debate, and dissect the hottest and sometimes most controversial political and social issues with some of the biggest names and smartest people, all through the lens of sports. So here's the assignment. Listen to Spolitics on the iHeartRadio app,

Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts, because on Spolitics, no one is told to just shut up and dribble. My guest today has made his living lurking in the shadows, speaking in whispers and blurring the line between nightmares and reality with several insanely successful haunted houses nationwide. May God have mercy on his soul. Please welcome the architect of fear, Chris.

Chris, thank you for being here. Yeah, thanks for having me, appreciate it. Where are you from originally? Originally from upstate New York, Rochester. Rochester, you know Rochester gets a bad rap sometimes. I think it does, yeah, I agree. You give me a choice of where to live, Rochester or Buffalo, I'm taking Rochester every time. I agree hands down

I think lately it's gotten some press for great places to live or something like that. That's nice to hear. Yeah. I just want the people of Buffalo to know that their place is horrible. Alright so now you live in you live in Denver. I live in Denver yeah my wife thinks I live here part-time but I live in Denver. You do a lot of work in Los Angeles? Yeah, we have four events here in LA now, so I'm out here a lot. Talk to me about Sean Payton.

Were you happy with that decision? Yes, I was happy with that. And then you knew that the writing was on the wall for old Russ? It sure looked like that right away. Do you blame John Elway? I think John Elway just came out and blamed himself, actually.

John Elway, though, maybe he's just trying to cement his own legacy by never letting someone better than him become a quarterback in Denver. That would be a conspiracy but I could get behind it. Does he still have all those dealerships everywhere? He does yeah. Is there still one down in South Bay Eddie? Yeah I think I bought a Toyota from a while back. You bought a Toyota from John Elway? Good on ya. How many haunted houses are we looking at now? Yeah, we have 18 and 12 different markets. Are you the biggest company that does this?

As far as I'm aware, we are the largest Halloween live event company in the world. And you had a haunted house called 13th Floor. Yeah, it started in Denver originally. What floor was it on? On ground level. So the backstory is that the 13th floor is hidden underground so that they can hide it because it's absent in so many buildings. You ever hear Mitch Hedberg's joke about the 13th floor?

No. He had a joke about if you kill yourself on the 14th floor, you're going to die sooner. You're losing me on this one. Because they don't have the it's actually the third the 14th floor is always the third. Gotcha. You know what that I probably didn't do the joke right. Did I do the joke right? I gotta look it up.

Said something like that doesn't matter who cares. No I'll be honest with you my favorite holiday is Christmas and my second favorite holiday is Christmas Eve. To me the best thing about Halloween is getting ready for Christmas now it's acceptable to start celebrating. Well, now it's Christmas is in the stores

before Halloween even kicks off. It's pretty crazy. Are you one of these people that Halloween was always your favorite holiday or no? Probably, yeah. I mean, Christmas is pretty close, but Halloween, I think, was, you know, it was fun being involved in Haunted Houses.

It's a very unique way to celebrate the season, and you know, I like the fall a lot, so just kind of tied together. I do like the fall. You say fall over autumn? Yeah, I do. I do too. Now, is it just October or you're year round? Nah, it's year round.

We're already working on next season right now when this season just kicked off really. Favorite horror movie, do you have any that you liked? I grew up with the classic slashers. I grew up in the 80s, so you know, Freddie, Jason, Michael, those are kind of my go-tos. Yeah. Nightmare on Elm Street as a kid, that scared me.

Yeah, it did. You really, you played to the one thing that's the worst for a kid, like you can't fall asleep. If you fall asleep, you're gonna die. Did you like to be scared as a child? Not really, actually, and wasn't really a big horror fan, but when I was a teenager, I was 15 years old, and a friend of mine called me up and said,

hey, do you wanna go scare some people tonight? And I said, well, are we gonna get in trouble or arrested, or what's this like? His family owned a local haunted house, and that's where I got started, went out there, started scaring people, got bit by the haunted house bug, and have been involved in one way or another for my entire life.

We started our first professional haunted house in 2002. Okay. But from 98 until 2010, I had a career in banking. And how did your wife handle you saying, listen, I really want to knock it off with the banking and just go full-time haunted house? Yeah, yeah. I went to her in 2006, and I said, hey, I think I can scale this haunted house business. She said, let me get this straight.

You have a great job. You have an awesome work-life balance. They pay you well. You like what you do. She's like, I'm not saying no, but I think you should really think about this. But then in 2008, when the financial crisis hit, my job became super unfun overnight.

We were doing land development and construction lending, which overnight was kind of a mess. So she said, hey, it's time for you to go do what you wanna do and have some fun. You know, they say happy husband, and they don't say anything, because they don't care if the husbands are happy. There's no saying for happy husband.

Just go to work. Were you terrified going into this, like diving in? A little bit. You know, it's funny, I hadn't thought about that in a while, but in 2008 I remember when I was like, all right, this is what we're gonna do. And I was like, man, I hope this works out. Is it more passion or is it profit at this point?

Like, is it cash cow? It's equal. I know that sounds like a PC response, but like, you gotta have both sides of it. You gotta have passion for the product, but you also have to have you know a business acumen You got to market it you got to finance it you got to you know do all those other things and I think that Successful attractions blend both of those together they say fear is an aphrodisiac is this whole enterprise rooted around kink

No Not at all What's the best state for enthusiasm for all the haunted houses? Honestly, California, LA has an incredible fandom over haunted events, like nothing I ever see in any other market. Because they're godless. I don't know. I think. No. No, I mean, that's impressive. I mean, there's a sheer numbers thing though. There is, yeah.

There's that. But I think it's a little more than that out here. I think maybe, you know, having the theme parks out here kind of facilitated that. And now I think they're seeking out alternative events to the theme parks as well. How's the Hayride doing? Hayride's awesome.

Hayride's like great to be in LA, but get transported to like, you know, it feels like the East Coast vibe or a Midwest vibe during Halloween. Can you rent out your own hay ride? A private ride? You can rent a private hay ride trailer. Uh-huh. Yep.

And just go solo? You can go solo if you want. Most people bring his group. I just wanna sit there by myself. Worry about you. You know, I think you'd trip out the actors if you did that. I just wanna sit there by myself. Worry about you. You know, I think you'd trip out the actors if you did that. If it was just you by yourself. Can you eat while you're on the hayride?

Not on the hayride. Ah, it's a shame. Yeah. I like that. A burger on the hayride? Well, I mean, I don't know. I just, I always like to be eating. Now, what's pulling these hayrides?

Tractors, like actual farm tractors. Do you own them? We do, yeah. How many do you own? We own 11 of them, I believe. What brand are we looking at? Are they Deers? This is terrible. Are they John Deers?

They're not, they're red. They're, okay. I don't know the brand. I'm in the market for one that doesn't run anymore. What are you gonna do with it? Put it in my yard. Yeah? Like as a pretty thing to look at.

Yard art? Yeah. Your neighbors love it. What do I care about them? I just want an old tractor, but I think- Put it in my yard. Yeah. Like as a pretty thing to look at. Yard art? Yeah. Your neighbors love it. What do I care about them? I just want an old tractor. I think old John Deere's are pretty badass. It'd be cool.

The problem is they don't, they keep restoring them. They're like 1940s and they're still running. There's a lot of people that collect them now. Yeah. I don't want to spend a lot. I just want an old junky tractor to put in the yard. Seems like something fun to climb on and get a big old rust cut. What about the boat?

What's the ship thing? Dark Harbor in Long Beach. Yeah, I mean, amazing old haunted ship. We do haunted mazes on the ship. There's three on the ship and then there's two in the harbor that are adjacent to the ship. What's the ship do the rest of the year? It's a hotel.

They also have restaurants. I didn't know that. Yeah. You ever been on that ship, Eddie? I have been on it. You have? Yeah, I've been to this event. Of course you have. Oh, man.

What's the scariest thing every year? Are new things being invented, or is it still just like jump out and startle people? When people say they're getting scared in a haunted house, it's usually they're being startled. So a loud noise, a loud effect, something like that, lighting changes. It's really hard to scare people,

and the emotional aspect of scaring people, but it's easy to startle people. And that's mostly what people are looking for, I think, when they go to a haunted house. Why do you think people like being scared? I think when people are scared, it's the same type of chemical release in your body, like when you're happy or you're excited.

I think they go to see their friends be scared. I think they go in a group of people with someone they know is going to be scared so that they can watch and see what that person's reaction is. Are you into the gore and those type of stuff? Not so much really. Yeah, I like the psychological stuff better. I think it's a little scarier as far as films go. Okay, forget films, but are your guys walking around

like severed arms and all that stuff? Yes. Yeah. What about torturing each other? Are they doing that stuff? No, not torturing each other, but everybody likes something different in a haunted house and there are certain fans that they wanna see the gore,

they wanna see things that look real that aren't real. So yeah, we have a lot of that in the haunted houses. What is the protocol if somebody gets too scared? Usually the actors or sometimes we have event staff in the attractions and they can identify that and ask them if they're okay and escort them out through an emergency exit. I don't want to be asked, escorted out by some monster.

Well, that's why we have to have event staff there as well. Because the last thing you want to do when you're terrified is have a monster come up and find out if you're okay. You ever have someone have a heart attack and just die? No, nobody died. Nobody's stroked out in the middle of one of these things? We have had people pass out and have it be a little too much for them, sure.

I've had that at a show before. I thought my jokes were just doing real well, then turned out it was really bad. You ever get scared walking through your own haunted houses? I don't get scared in haunted houses. For me, it's the dark, right? It's like the fear of the unknown to me is way scarier than what you might see in a haunted house.

You're just saying in the, just general, in darkness, you don't like it? Yeah, I don't like darkness. Not a big fan. Scared of the dark, I guess. Do you like haunted houses? Do you go? No. No.

No? No. The thing is, if I went, I would love it. But I'm also okay with, well, I didn't go. And that was really lovely. Not going out. Yeah. All right. That's where I'm at on most things.

You really have to persuade. I mean, my whole day gets ruined when I find out my wife has set up an activity. I'm like, oh no, honestly, the real nightmare of all these places is the parking, true or false? Pretty true, depends on the venue, but definitely pretty true. Cause everybody wants to go on the weekend,

it's the only time that all their friends are available. So it's not nasty to park if you come on a Thursday or Sunday, but if you're gonna go on a Friday and Saturday, it's at a premium for sure. You always have to do it at night too. That's a problem for me with the Halloween stuff. I wish we could do it there was like a matinee show and just not as scary though. That's the problem.

No, it's a, it takes the sun going down for people to get a little in the, in the spooky mood, I guess. The bathroom situation. That's the nightmare at all these places. Yeah. A lot of work to keep those clean and ready for use. Oh because you have to deal with the worst the worst group of people on the planet has to be like 12 to 16 year olds just

dealing with them constantly. Yeah. They're just monsters. Yeah I'm not sure I should comment on that. No you can't but I mean I see it I go to a local fair every now Yeah, I'm not sure I should comment on that. No, you can't. But I mean, I see it. I go to a local fair every now and then. I'm just like, look at. And then they dress like whores. You're just like, this is awful. How's a fire marshal feel about adding tons of walls and trip hazards to a dark room?

Yeah, I mean, they feel great about it. It's wonderful. Do they actually go, guys, you can't do this? Yeah, most of our fire marshals we have a great relationship with, we haven't really ran into anybody that is anti-haunted house or Halloween. They just want to make sure it's safe and we want to make sure the same thing. So having an open dialogue with them is always really helpful as well. What can't you do?

I'm just trying to think of things that I would hate. If I was in a haunted house and all of a sudden, like I go into one around a corner and I'm walking in like three inches of muddy water, that would infuriate me. Yeah, I don't think I'd wanna do that either. Are you allowed to do that though? I think we would be allowed to do muddy water,

but I don't think that would be. You wanna really upset people. Yeah. That go out in their sneakers. I don't like, some want to you want to really upset people. Yeah, they go out in their sneakers I don't like some haunted houses incorporate water effects. I'm not a big fan of them. Yeah, I don't get wet Yeah, I don't want to feel moisture exactly In a dark room, what about smell you mess with smells we do mess with smells Oh, yeah, I know and there's there's a company out there that sells disgusting

Smelling sense you can put in the haunted house The problem with those is as much as you might want to use them for the the guests coming through so they Catch a quick smell of that. I just feel terrible for the actors that are stuck in there with that smell the whole night I mean there has to be a pecking order with your actors and I feel like you know what you you mess up a couple times You're on the stink gun or you get to graduate from smell to nonsmell maybe. That's what you could do. You could have like some weird dead woman with a bottle of perfume,

like she's at like a Macy's at the holidays spraying people. And she just comes up to you and sprays you and then you're just covered in stink. Yeah, and that stuff does not go away. So. No, that's not good. What's the age range? What's the lowest age that can not? You know, it's determinant on the kid.

I've seen kids as young as five and six have a great time. There's no rule? There's no rule. We tell them when they show up that we don't recommend it for kids under 12, and we tell them that it's a ticket booth. Oh, under 12, OK. But it's kind of parents discretion. I think some of them make good choices

because they know the kids, and some of them make good choices because they know the kids and some of them make bad choices because their kids shouldn't be there, but they are. You know, we- Like a responsible drug dealer. Yeah. I think that the core age though is your pre-teen to 20 something,

but that's starting to skew older. I think haunted houses, the production value has gotten a lot higher and now it's more about a whole night of entertainment. So older people are starting to stick with haunted houses a lot longer than I think they used to. What are ticket ranges? Prices range from?

You know, on average right now, they're about, you know, $35 for kind of your base ticket to get you in the door. And that really hasn't changed drastically. When you look at inflation over the years, over leave in the last 10 years, haunted houses are still a pretty good value as it comes to live entertainment. And you handled COVID without any major wax? COVID was rough, but the nature of what we do

in haunted entertainment is we social distance by nature. Like you don't wanna be more than six feet from the group in front of you. So there was a lot of educating to the people in charge to say, hey, we can open this safely and we can keep people apart from each other and keep them in their family groups. Cha-ching is what I heard. Yeah. Or just trying to lose less money that year.

I mean, yeah, but at least you weren't in the concert business. Yeah, exactly. Do you guys have a thing where like at a big scare moment, there's a photo taken of them that they can buy later So we don't have a photo moment, but we are currently experience or experimenting with a video moment So we have a RFID tag they go through the haunted house And there's five different scare points and it records like a couple seconds before they go into the room until a couple seconds after It's pretty cool. Yeah, I don't want you leaving money on the table. Yeah, I'm trying do that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You got a gift shop there too? We have big gift shops now.

Uh-huh. Yeah, people love buying spooky things for Halloween. You sell a faulty pregnancy test in your gift shop? Oh no. That might be a big seller though. It's a good gag. Put those in there. That really scares some people. What's it cost to run one of your attractions? You know, it depends on the venue. On the low end, multiple of hundreds of thousand dollars on the larger end in the millions of dollars trip run the different events.

Do you look at your daily, oh man, this is what we're spending so much money on every year. Payroll, yeah, actors, staff. I mean, that's the number one expense, hands down. And the amount of actors that you have. Once again. Do you audition these idiots?

No, I don't personally audition anybody anymore, but we do have auditions, usually for the more specialized roles, more acting intensive roles. People are just screaming and running up to me. Yeah. Are they allowed to touch you? No, we don't touch.

No, it's kind of an unspoken rule. A lot of people say, oh, I was touched in a haunted house, but it's usually the actor, they're in a dark space, they'll bump into you, run into you accidentally. I was touched in a haunted house too, but that's for my therapist to figure out. What's the oldest person that you guys hire? I don't know officially the oldest,

but all of our attractions, I always see an old actor that makes you question. It's amazing how many different people from different professions just wanna do it for fun. You use children actors ever? We do not. You're not allowed to? We just find kids just terrifying.

So we- You put a kid in there. We actually have some actors that are child sized. I like-huh I like what you're saying. Yeah and when they're made up you you would swear they're a kid but they're you know legal adults. Uh-huh. All right. Loopholes. I love it. What kind of background checks are you doing on all these actors and employees? Everyone gets a background check before they become an employee. Everyone. I mean I don't want to talk about worst case scenarios, but are you guys prepared for all that stuff?

Yeah, no, we stay very diligent. It's an actual real crazy. Yeah, we stay very diligent in keeping the actual crazies out of the haunted house. Those makeup artists, the amount of time it takes, is there a sped up version that you guys are doing with all these actors? Yeah, a lot of the makeup artists use an airbrush makeup

so they can move really fast. So they can draw in different details and you know. But they're putting like gels and flesh. Not everyone, you know, so different levels of actor depending upon how visible they're gonna be in the haunted house. So the ones that are gonna be more visible might have like a prosthetic treatment

like you're talking about. But a lot of them are airbrush. And with shadows and things, they can do some really cool makeups with their brush. You ever put a mask on and scare people? I did I mean that's how I started. No but I mean now. Now they undercover boss style. It's been about eight years and I think the last time I did it I was absolutely exhausted after about 20 minutes so I gave up, hung up the mask. That's a misconception with people.

They all think they want to work in a haunted house, but it's hard work. You're in a mask or a hot costume, you're in a dark cramped space, and it's hard jumping out, doing the same thing repetitively for over like a five hour night. What do you think about these Gen Zs?

How's their work ethic? Different, questionable maybe. I'm trying to stay correct here, I got a lot of Gen Z actors. Look, you know, the- I mean you're really in it. Yeah. You really can see every generation go,

oh, this is awful. Yeah, I think the one upcoming is pretty good. I think the next one up is gonna be good. I can't get my kid to do anything. There's good luck with a boss telling him to do something. I loved working as a kid. Yeah? Oh yeah.

Well, I mean, just because that was the only way I was ever gonna get money or get to do anything. Yeah. Like my parents just didn't care. They're like, yeah, we're not giving you anything. Yeah, no, that's changed a lot. I have two kids at home that I'm like wondering when they're gonna get kicked out of the nest.

Oh, would you kick them out? Would your wife let you kick them out? Probably not. Yeah. That's all right. There's worse things to have in your house. Your kids are what? My kids are 18 and 20.

My son actually turns 21 on Thursday this week. You're kind of an empty nester. Is that even a thing anymore? Because it seems like kids just stay with us forever. Yeah, they have not left the nest yet. Yeah. They've failed to launch, for sure. Did your kids, did they like Halloween as a kid?

They did not like it as young kids. Up until the time they were about 12. In fact, when my son was really young, he used to be excited about the different catalogs and things that would come in the mail. He'd say, I wanna look at the spooky stuff. But when he was five, my stepfather decided to scare him when he was over at his house. And from the time he was five until he was about 12, he wanted nothing to do with it.

Really scared him. I think he just figured out what fear was. You know, he figured out he didn't, he wasn't jazzed about that. So, but. Smart kid. Yeah. What do you do personally at your own home on Halloween? When my kids were young, my wife would get crap from the neighbors because she said, So, but. Smart kid. Yeah. What do you do personally at your own home on Halloween?

When my kids were young, my wife would get crap from the neighbors because she said, they're like, your husband is Mr. Halloween and your house is the most boring house on the block. You tell your neighbors, if they shell out 50 bucks, you'll up the game. Cause I was working, you know, I was out, you know,

and the kids weren't old enough to be celebrating. But once my kids were old enough, I did start decorating the yard, and I would take things from the haunted house, fog machines, speakers, I did projections in our windows, different props, and you would think I created the most incredible haunted house at all time. My neighbors are out there with their phones out,

and I wanna say to them, I'm like, right down the street, there's a place we invested millions of dollars in that people are still going through and coming out the other side going, eh, it was okay. Are your kids going to take over your empire? You know, I did not push either one of them to get involved in any way, but they both are involved now. They both work at our location in Denver. My daughter's an actress and she also does some makeup there.

And then my son is more on the tech side, so kind of the behind the scenes. But I felt like I didn't want to push them to be involved I wanted it to be their own choice to be involved but yeah they're both involved and I see them growing with the company and probably taking on more responsibility. How do I forget this first question do you believe in ghosts? You know I want to believe in ghosts and I feel like I should believe in ghosts but no I don't believe in ghosts. Because you've seen behind the curtain too much. Exactly. Ah, that's a shame. That's a shame.

I really wanted you to believe in ghosts. The people that care about Halloween too much, do they freak you out a little bit? I think anybody that cares about anything too much is a little scary, but you know, I don't know. It's like those Disney adults that have to go to Disney constantly. What about international?

Have you put one overseas yet? We're not open overseas yet. I bet you could do some weird stuff in some of these Asian countries. Oh man, they're probably into some freaky scary stuff. I might not be tuned into the Asian horror scene quite yet. Oh, but I bet I'm talking about money on the table. Yeah, I mean Halloween is growing fast in in other parts of the world You know it was always traditionally more of an American thing, but now I don't even know it

I don't even know that that's true. It was just yeah, it's an American holiday And now it's it's growing fast in Europe Asia the Middle East people used to ask me Where are you gonna expand to I said take Denver draw about a two and a half hour flight radius That's a pretty safe bet. Yeah, you got one in Aspen yet? No, no, I don't think it'd work out up there. What other cities? Well, you got Colorado Springs. Those people are, talk about scary.

The people in Colorado Springs, there's a bunch of loonies over there, aren't there? Great people in Colorado Springs. Oh, my fault. They love driving to Denver for LaHonid House. Yeah, good. What about those, the things where I hear of people being completely actually paid

to be tortured basically? I don't know exactly what I'm talking about, but. Not haunted houses is my big statement on those, right? It's like, you know, to your point, it's like a simulated abduction or a simulated torture. Not what we do. And I, and you know, it gets a lot of press around Halloween, but I don't think anybody that really just

wants to celebrate Halloween is into that stuff. You know, I think that's more of a unique person. It's like a fun date night. Come on, honey. If we can make it till sunup, we get a hundred thousand dollars. Yeah, there you go. Everybody that's on my show gets a gift and it's just

stuff that I have around my house. So I was like, oh, I don't know what to give you. But then I thought of something. I got you. I've never used it. Not one time in my life. Got you my chainsaw. Oh my God. This is awesome. I don't think I've ever had my own chainsaw. Yeah. I figured I was like, well, I don't need this. Look, I even, I even have all the stuff because I'm like, they're like, oh, you're gonna need barn oil cleaner and you're gonna need all, whatever this is, low smoke. What was the plan for it when you got it?

I'm like, because I was a man, like I have a house. And they're like, well, you need a chainsaw. Well, this is part of the man card. Now I have one. I haven't had one before, so this is good. And then you're supposed to sharpen a chain. All of it just seems like-

How do you sharpen this thing? Don't they have like a file that goes in between each single- You have to file it, you kind of run across it. No, listen, it's never been used. That's a 16 inch chain, so that's a craftsman. I appreciate it. That two year warranty's gotta be void.

That thing has been sitting in my garage. The box is discolored on the top. It's been here a while. Oh, it's been there many, many years. Never thought to use it. All right, get that off my desk, please. This is my mask that I've done a bit on. I had an old TV show and I did a bit and it was...

Oh yeah. I love this baby. I know the artist that made that. You do? Yeah. Big ass baby. Yeah, his name's Landon Yeah, land it landed good work because this baby is hell. Oh, I know. Yeah, it's the right It's the right amount of McCree. I'm not giving it to you, but I just This is the worst thing in the world. That is the worst thing in the world

100% my wife bought that and goes hey, I go. What are you talking about? That is the worst thing in the world. 100%. My wife bought that and goes, I go, what are you talking about? That is pure shit. Yeah, you cannot carve a pumpkin with this. Do you carve pumpkins? I do. Go ahead and get that off my next tube. I finally stopped carving real pumpkins and now we have these forever pumpkins.

So if you carve your design into it, at least you can keep it year after year. Now that the kids are older, they don't care. Oh, you blew my mind. Forever pumpkin. It's a foam pumpkin. And you cut it. Yeah, and you can cut a design into it just like a regular pumpkin.

Is it like hard to cut like a real pumpkin to where you will slice yourself? I like that. Yes. Yeah, it is. The nice thing about it is once they're carved, you can keep them every year and just kind of keep adding. You don't have to run out and get a live pumpkin every year. We get pumpkins lots of them. I never knew that. I always thought you bought one pumpkin. Yeah. My wife we go to a pumpkin patch and she's getting gourds and pumpkins and she gets like ten to put next to each other by the end of it. All the different colors, all the

different. And then we don't carve a single one. No? No. How come? I don't have the answer to that. It's just like they just look nicer. Maybe when your kids are a little older they're gonna want maybe they'll want to carve one. I don't I hope not because I don't want to do it. No. You guys decorate your house for Halloween? Yeah. You do? Yep. What do you put up Eddie? I do that you know that glass garage door. I do a projection from the inside. Nice. So like it's a bit like a skeleton dances around Can you could you just play something yeah, you can just play a movie oh yeah, why don't you put why don't you just put like this the saw

anthology You know a lot that you can't play play those type of movies right that the neighborhood shut that down I think neighborhood be upset about that one. My neighborhood, they used to just do one section of the street and people would go crazy and do all kinds of things. And then just recently a few neighbors have moved and they dropped the ball.

It's no longer exciting. Yeah, I remember when I was a kid, it was like Halloween and trick or treating was huge, especially back East. People would stop by your house and you'd welcome them in, but now it's like people come and ring your doorbell, you don't want anything to do with them, so. I never went into a house though.

You went into houses as a kid, that's dangerous. No, no, no, just ringing the doorbell. Okay, all right. Anybody says come on in, it's like, aw. Yeah, don't go to that house. What's your favorite candy given out at the Halloween? Reese's. Peanut butter cups? Peanut butter cups. Not Reese's Pieces. Those were at the Halloween? Reese's. Peanut butter cups?

Peanut butter cups. Not Reese's Pieces. Those are good, but peanut butter cups. Yeah, peanut butter cups. I'm not liking that they've tried to diversify so much. This one has extra peanut butter. This one is twice as thick. I saw one with potato chips in it or something.

Don't need that nonsense. No. You guys perfected it a long time ago. That's right. Just knock it off. What's the best store to go to for Halloween decorations? I like Spirit. I think it's fun.

I mean, for what it is, the prices are pretty low to do something fun at your house. I can't do those where you step on the buttons and the kids, it's too much for them already. I bet. I've already found that I've gone too far. Least favorite holiday? Probably Labor Day because it's so close to our season

and once Labor Day hits I'm like, oh crap, here it comes. I mean, it's kind of nice though that it's truncated into October really, isn't it? Yeah, I mean for us it's like mid September now through mid November is our season. Is your goal to become the scariest or does that not? I think my goal is to become the most entertaining. It's like, nowadays we all live our digital lives

where you know what your family's doing, you know what your friends are doing, you look at your phone, but creating unique events that people can share together socially is really what we're all about. So, and not everybody likes to be terrified, right? So we like to add the scary elements, but also add elements where people can just hang out

and have a good time and celebrate Halloween. Are you happy or sad that you're right before the election? I think people need a diversion. So I think it's good. Oh, of course they do. Yeah, I think people wanna get out and not think about things, and ultimately that's what we provide. If we give you 30 minutes where you're not thinking

about anything else while you're in a haunted house, I think that's a pretty cool thing. You think people are prepping for the Civil War that's what we provide. If we give you 30 minutes where you're not thinking about anything else while you're in a haunted house, I think that's a pretty cool thing. You think people are prepping for the Civil War that's coming? Oh, God, I hope not. All right, Chris, well, I know you have to get back to work. I know, I'm gonna bring my new chainsaw, get back to work with it.

Ah! Thank you for being on the show. Yeah, I appreciate it, man. Thanks, man. Yep. Hey, Bo. Hey, Matt. Are you ready to tell the readers about Yeah, I appreciate it. Thanks, man. Yeah. Hey, Bo. Hey, Matt.

Are you ready to tell the readers about the extra special episode we have coming up? It's raining. Yes. It's pouring. I see. So, but you can do that kind of spooky scary. Well, yeah, but it's also because it's a ride. Yeah, I can't stop.

I'm down on it. But you're in it, you know? Yeah, exactly. You're in the spook. I think we have to let them in on our little surprise. Yeah, if you haven't already figured it out, can't believe this, Mariah Carey will be joining us this week. I say, oh, I want to go work with such and such

from across town. Yeah, from across town. My girl across town. Yeah, across town. I know a guy across town. I know a guy. Readers, publishers, Katie's, and finalists, tune in to maybe the most unforgettable episode of Lost Culturistas yet.

There's one more question which I promised myself I would ask. Can you drop that grunge album? I'm so mad that I haven't done that yet. But you don't have to be mad because you're in control. I am, but who do I drop it with? Should we start a label? Maybe. Wow. Listen to Las Colteristas on the iHeartRadio app,

Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. On Thanksgiving Day, 1999, a five-year-old boy floated alone in the ocean. He had lost his mother trying to reach Florida from Cuba. He looked like a little angel. I mean, he looked so fresh. And his name, Elian Gonzalez, will make headlines everywhere. Elian Gonzalez. Elian Gonzalez. Elian Gonzalez.

Elian Gonzalez. At the heart of the story is a young boy and the question of who he belongs with. His father in Cuba. Mr. Gonzalez wanted to go home and he wanted to take he belongs with. His father in Cuba. Mr. Gonzalez wanted to go home and he wanted to take his son with him. Or his relatives in Miami. Imagine that your mother died trying to get you to freedom. At the heart of it all is still

this painful family separation. Something that as a Cuban, I know all too well. Listen to Chess Piece, the Elian Gonzalez story, as part of the MyCultura podcast network available on the iHeart radio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Stick to sports. Sports and politics don't mix. Or my personal favorite, shut up and dribble. I've heard these complaints throughout my sports journalism career but despite what some people believe sports and politics have mixed since the beginning. Now you have a podcast that isn't afraid to explore the complicated marriage

between sports and politics with a new podcast called Spolitics with me Jamel Hill. Join me as I fearlessly explore political, social, and economical issues through the lens of sports with some of the biggest names and smartest people. You might even learn something. So here's the assignment. Listen to Spolitics on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. And let's get Spolitical. I want to thank Chris for being on the show. That was delightful. Yeah.

I'm not into being scared. Speaking of things I don't enjoy, Nazis. You see a swastika and you know that is bad, right? Yep. Yeah. Where are you guys at on the rising sun flag, the wartime flag during World War II from Japan, correct? Mm-hmm. I don't ever trust anything that I say, but I'm told that some people view that

similar to a Nazi flag. And I was unaware of that. And then the other day, I was organizing my belt drawer. Do you have a belt drawer? It doesn't matter. And I see this belt that I own. And I'm like, is that the rising sun flag on my belt? And I never knew about this.

Is that what that is? Sure looks like it. Sure looks like it, right? Yeah. So I'm like, I can't wear this belt. And whose fault is this Carrie? Carrie my stylist she buys all my stuff and she's buying me basically a Nazi belt No idea

Are you guys aware of this or not? I was not aware. You're not aware of it. Yeah, I'll tell you the real irony here the back of this belt I don't know if you can zoom in on that, says made in China. Wow. You telling me that the Chinese people were making this belt going, these assholes, really rubbing it in our face with all their war atrocities. Anyway, I'm not gonna, I'm just gonna get rid of this belt.

I'm not gonna give it to anyone. I'm just gonna throw it away. Now I don't know why I didn't flag it, pun intended, the first time I saw it and put it in my drawer. But man, you know, that's one of the things where I stroke out and die or something and then people come through my stuff and they say, well look at this. Collector.

Well looky here. By the way, I could be completely wrong and that flag's not offensive, but I just, you know, I like to err on the side of what the fuck and just blame Carrie. Anyway, all right, it's time for some plugs. And we got some good plugs now. You ready for this? Carl, boyswearpink.com, uh, uh, ToshShowStore.com,

get your ToshShow merch, and then get a free tickle, if you see me in the streets. Go to eddygosling.com, check out his tour dates. Go to danieltosh. com to check out our tour dates Come on come see us do stand-up. It is really fun To watch me live You just you just learn so much about me and my wife and how strong our relationship is

That she can put up with my shit. Okay now for our new segment. Not so new, it's been like a couple months right? The free plug. Hit the free plug music Eddie. Oh look at this. I didn't know the music was gonna change every week. I like it. I might need my glasses for this. Today's free plug is for those of you in Oscoda, Michigan. October 26 at 7 p.m. is opening night for the Shoreline Players production of The Addams Family, a new musical comedy. Tickets are $15 for adults and $10 for students, which seems like a steal. $10 to see the Addams Family, a new musical comedy? Well, let's just say you live in a Tawah City or Saginaw,

you can't make it up to Oscoda for opening night. Don't worry, this production's gonna run through November 3rd, down at 6000 North Skille Avenue in Oscoda, Michigan, right across from a Robert J. Parks library. I don't know what the parking situation's gonna be like there, I'm sure on the opening weekend it's gonna be a clusterfuck.

Head on over to shorelineplayers.org, and they'll straighten it out for you. I don't know, maybe the parking situation's great there. That's always my fear, where do we park? You think they have valet? I'm guessing they don't. You like valet? I always prefer not to valet.

I always like to get places early, find some street parking, and then just walk in. And then I take that $5 savings, put that in a jar, and I save that jar. And then one day I'm gonna give that jar to whichever kid I like the most and Say this was for all the times. I didn't use valet Now go get yourself something. Carl. What do you think of that idea?

You dying over there? Your hair looks cute. You little top pony. Alright guys, we gotta get out of here. See you next week Hey, Bo. Hey Matt. Are you ready to tell the readers about the extra special episode we have coming up? I think we have to let them in on our little surprise. Yeah, if you haven't already figured it out, the queen of Christmas herself, can't believe this, Mariah Carey, will be joining us this week. Wow.

Readers, publicists, Katie's, and finalists, tune in to maybe the most unforgettable episode of Los Culturistas yet. Listen to Los Culturistas on Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. On Thanksgiving Day 1999 five-year-old Cuban boy Elian Gonzalez was found off the coast of Florida. And the question was, should the boy go back to his father in Cuba? Mr. Gonzalez wanted to go home and he wanted to take his son with him. Or stay with his relatives in Miami?

Imagine that your mother died trying to get you to freedom. Listen to Chess Peace, the Elian Gonzalez story, on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Stick to sports, shut up and dribble. Despite what some people believe, sports and politics have mixed from the beginning. Now you have a podcast that isn't afraid to explore the complicated relationship between sports and politics with

a new podcast called Spolitics with me, Jamel Hill. I'll be discussing political, social, and economic issues through the lens of sports with some of the biggest names and smartest people. So here's the assignment. Listen to Spolitics on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. Let's get Spolitical.