Trading Secrets - 228. Kelley Flanagan Returns! From lessons learned from previous relationships and importance of family, major updates from the last few years, and not worrying about a five year plan Episode Description:

Episode Date: March 31, 2025

This week, Jason is joined by a Bachelor fan favorite and one of his great personal friends, Kelley Flanagan! Kelley last joined us on Trading Secrets at the end of 2022 when we dived into her time on The Bachelor, her career as an attorney, and plans for her life as a content creator. Professionally, her content creation career has fully taken off as she shares fashion and lifestyle content with her 1 million plus followers. Personally, she has experienced some of life’s hardest moments as she continues to fight her battle with Lyme disease, going through a public breakup, and more recently the loss of her father.  In this episode, Kelley opens up about why she stepped away from podcasts for a few years, the joy she’s found in her life, and the personal, financial, and professional impact of moving for a relationship. She discusses how her goals were put on hold during her last relationship, the safety nets she kept, and her new golden rules for dating. Kelley also reflects on her parents’ marriage, why she’s not stressing about having kids at 33, her thoughts on The Bachelor fanbase, and the truth always coming out. From her Chanel bag journey to the work ethic instilled by her dad, Kelley shares why she doesn’t have a five-year plan, whether she'd return to reality TV, and what she would have done differently in regards to the show. Kelley reveals all this and so much more in another episode you can’t afford to miss! Host: Jason Tartick Co-Host: David Arduin Audio: John Gurney Guest: Kelley Flanagan Stay connected with the Trading Secrets Podcast!  Instagram: @tradingsecretspodcast  Youtube: Trading Secrets Facebook: Join the Group All Access: Free 30-Day Trial  Trading Secrets Steals & Deals! Hims: Hims is changing men's healthcare by providing you with access to affordable sexual health treatments from the comfort of your couch. Just answer a series of questions on their site and a medical provider will determine the right treatment option. If prescribed, your medication ships directly to you, for free. Start your free online visit today at Hims.com/TRADINGSECRETS Quince: Vacation season is nearly upon us. This year, treat yourself to the luxe upgrades you deserve with Quince's high-quality travel essentials at fair prices. Go to Quince.com/tradingsecrets for 365-day returns, plus free shipping on your order. GEICO: Invest in your future by protecting your car, home, pet, RV, and more with GEICO. Get a quote today at https://on.gei.co/41ppSLv

Welcome back to another episode of Trading Secrets. I'm your host, Jason Tartick, and welcome to the pre-market trading segment where I'll tell you a little bit about what you can expect from today's guests, an update from the market and something going on in my personal life. Before I go any further, please go to Apple and or Spotify. five and give us five stars and in that review make sure that you put either your username or your instagram handle because every single week we are giving something away from what i call it influencer closet a lot of packages show up here and some of the products i don't end up promoting and uh they're just sitting in the closet collecting dust and they range in value sometimes from like 25 bucks to 500 so make sure you just go give us a review and uh every single week we're

giving something away and this week it's going to c b s u t r uh you just like you just left the review. It's a new listener. Love this podcast and is now my weekly listen. Love the financial tips. And obviously that Jason has a golden retriever. Jason asked great questions. Lindsay Hubbard and Wes Wilson's episodes were your favorite so far. So go give us five stars. Now this week, we have Kelly Flanagan from the Bachelor franchise. She went on Peter Weber season and she came in, I think it was around fifth place or so. And then her and Peter ended up reconnecting after the season and dated for quite some time. and that didn't work out.

And then what you're going to hear in this episode is not about it all about Peter in her's relationship, but you're going to hear about another recent relationship that she was in with a gentleman. I shouldn't use the word gentleman. She was in a relationship with someone, and I don't want to use the name, so that's why I refer to him as gentleman,

and found out that he was cheating on her, amongst other things. And she went through the ringer in that relationship in a really, really tough way and spoke about it in depth on Chicks in the Office interview. And we talk a little bit about some of the struggles she had dealt with, but we don't really get into the drama as it relates to the specifics of the relationship. That's not as much what we do on this podcast, as you know. But we do talk about how the relationship struggles really impacted her professional work,

even her financial income and of course financial ties that connect to when you move in with someone and then when you leave that situation. So I did want to give you a little background when we do talk about that relationship, just a little context, and especially this is not Peter that we're talking about for anybody that's not up to date. It's about her last relationship. So anyway, there's that. This is just a jam-packed episode. I mean, we talk all about Bachelor franchise. We talk about what's next for her, her career, her earnings, some of her struggles.

She unfortunately, and then sadly just lost her father, talks a little bit about that. It's just like it's an intense episode with a lot of life lessons and a lot of personal lessons and a lot of business discussions too. And it's just a lot in this one. And it's a good one. And especially if, like, you or anyone you know is kind of going through it, it's one you got to listen to. So Kelly, thank you if you're listening to this for being so open and vulnerable and real and raw on this episode. We so appreciate it. The market. What is going

on? You know, it's a long episode. By the way, recaps. Recaps in the last 2025 recaps are electric. They're out of control. I don't know what's happening. It's like the wheels fall off with David and I and you're, we're sharing stuff. We definitely shouldn't be talking about. But we're just going. So I would highly recommend, especially for entertainment purposes, to stay tuned to the recap after this episode. This is a good hour and a half that you will learn a lot and laugh a lot, especially in the recap. Now, what's going on in the market? Man, on Friday, NASDAQ was down 2.7%. The S&P 500 is down around 2%. Dow Jones around 1.7%. There's just a lot of action happening in a lot of uncertainty in this stock market, and it is getting beat to shit right now.

You know, this week and the coming weeks, there is a lot that the market will be paying very, very close attention to. So there's a highly anticipated tariff announcement from the White House that's expected on Wednesday that will certainly dominate all the headlines out there. The Friday Jobs Report, that's another big economic event, because this will be the first unemployment report to fully capture everything related to these Doge layoffs and tariff-related uncertainty and earnings week, right? So what is earnings week? You'll see all the first quarter earnings from all the big companies start to come out. So it's just a lot of action. S&P 500 right

now is at a level that every stock trader and investors paying very close to 10. to because if it breaks through this 5,500 mark and goes lower than that, it'll be interesting because we've seen a lot of bounces and all eyes around the market. But you might be able to get good value of some cash sitting around. In a little update for my personal life, I'll be in New York City this week. I cannot wait. We are investors in the last five years, Nick Jonas's show, which makes us co-producers on the show. We invested $200,000 into it and put a group together. That came up with a $200,000, some familiar names in the group that helped us get to that point. Blake Horsman's in there.

We have Justin Glaze, Kyle Cook, amongst many others, and, of course, rewired talent. So if you go to New York City, go check out the last five years starring Nick Jonas. It is one hell of a show. Enough of me. Enough of Broadway talk. Enough of market talk. Let's ring of the bell with the one and only, Kelly Flanagan. Welcome back to another episode of Trading Secrets.

Today, we are joined again by a Bachelor Nation fan favorite and one of my great personal friends, Kelly Flanagan. Kelly last joined us on Trading Secrets at the end of 2022. Wow, that was a long time ago where we discussed your time on The Bachelor, your career is an attorney, and your plans for life as a content creator. A lot has changed for Kelly over the last two and a half years. Professionally, her content creation career has fully taken off as she shares fashion and lifestyle content with her 1 million plus followers.

Personally, she has experienced some of life's hardest moments. She continues to fight her battle with Lyme disease. In addition to that, she recently went through a public breakup, and more recently, she lost her father this past December. So what is next for her is Kelly looks to take this next step in her life. It begs the question of what it looks like to get started at a late age, to do things differently, both personally, professionally, and then also financially. So, Kelly, thank you so much for being on sharing secrets again.

Thanks for having me, Jason. I'm happy to be here. Can you believe that was two and a half years ago? I know. That was a wild. I stopped doing podcasts, and I don't know why because I genuinely always loved them, but yeah, I just, I denied when people had asked me to come on. Yeah.

I think you guys asked me a couple times. Why did you know? Why? I think it was the new relationship that I was in. I don't know. I just, I think it put a little bit of pressure on me not to be. be like as open as I once was. I think I just felt like a little bit of judgment to not say the right thing or feel like I messed up or in some way. So I just felt like there

was immense amount of pressure on me where I just like didn't even feel comfortable speaking anymore. You're saying it specifically in your last relationship. Yeah. Yeah. Because before that I was doing them like all the time. Yeah. Because I was going to say, well, I listened to your chicks in the office podcast. We already talked about that a little bit. Actually, honestly, on our ride up, here if we were miced up that would have been a podcast holy hell tea left and right we'll see how much of that comes on here i always say i always say they need to do a show like with the bachelor people after the fact because there is so much more drama that goes on that is way better than the show itself yeah and i feel like you got the tea like you got like you got like you got the

ins a lot of it happens to me unfortunately yeah and you're also like connect i feel like people feel comfortable. They tell you everything just on that car ride. I'm like, oh, my God, Jesus. Some of the things are like, you connected in my world. So I'm like, how does that happen? Anyway, moving on. I was going to start off with just, how are you? Because you've gone, I mean, you said you haven't done many podcasts, but you did chicks in the office, and I listened to that. And I think everyone saw those clips and felt for you and are rooting for you. And we see you turn the page, which was a hard page to turn, and then the loss of your father. And in the general just like stay to the union with Kelly like how are you yeah it's been tough I still feel like

I haven't really caught a break there's been like other things that just happen or just like little things some other family stuff but I just feel like I can't catch a break and that's okay I think that's another reason why you know a lot of people will be like why aren't you dating like what are you doing like right now I'm just trying to be extremely selfish with my time focus on myself there's definitely moments where like I'm happy and I have a lot of fun and then there's definitely times where like I'm not so I'm just trying to like get through it all you know yeah just trying to work a lot do a bunch of like Instagram stuff I feel like I kind of didn't prioritize that the past couple of years either so it's something that brings me happiness and I know

people are going to be like you're an influencer but I genuinely like really like it like I like what I do yeah so I want to prioritize that it brings me happiness I enjoy a lot like going to the events seeing a lot of my girlfriends and so I'm just trying to like get back to being me yeah I think this is one time in my life where I could be 100% selfish um you know eventually kids are going to come and you get married and you're on your husband schedule to some degree you could still have your independence but I think right now is a time for me to be a hundred percent selfish and just do what I want to do and like get back to working out a lot like I used to work out so much I just want to get healthy. I just want to make myself happy. And life hits you hard. So in those

moments, like, it sucks, but, you know, you're going to have a better chance to bounce back. Someone asked me this recently, and it's making me think I want to ask you, this is like, when is the last time you experienced what you would define is real joy? And what did that look like? And how do you get back to what that looked like? That's a good question. I don't know. I I don't know if I could like necessarily put like a situation on it, like thinking back, like what brought me most joy. I genuinely, I think what brings me most joy at the end of the day is being with my family. And again, we've definitely been through it, but it's always like good to be around them.

We're a big family. There's a lot of us. So just being around them and being able to be your like 100% authentic self, know that all of them have your back. We're super close. Just I like being in that community. in that community to know that I'm like 100% accepted. I could be 100% myself and we all like love each other,

gonna support each other and be there when like things go bad. Yeah, 100% family is everything and I'm rooting for you. I think we're all rooting for you. We have so much to talk about. I just want to ask a couple things, just a couple things on your last relationship and then we'll get through it, okay? Because I think, and it's the intention of asking this is purely because I know there's someone listening right now

that's going through this and I know there's someone listening that can benefit from either mistakes you've made or things you've learned. And the first one is, I know on chicks in the office, you talked, we'll just call this individual. You called him A on that podcast. We'll just refer to him as letter A, anonymous. You moved for him. And there are every day people that start dating and think one thing of their partner

and then learn something later. But they move for that person. They commit to them. That takes a professional impact on you, personal impact. and a financial impact. Through that experience, what type of financial, personal, and professional impact did it have? And what would you tell someone that's maybe thinking about doing just that? I wouldn't recommend what I did. I definitely learned from that mistake. I immediately moved in. How long after date? Three months, if that. That's quick. Yeah, it was quick. But also,

I think it was just like, again, doing like the whole influencing stuff. We can kind of be wherever we want. So I was just kind of like staying in Philly for a while. And then I just started getting like my packages sent up there. And then it was kind of like just happening. And then we moved in apartments. I would not recommend it at all. Maybe after a year to do that. It impacted me in ways because one, there's not much like job opportunities influencing. There's there wasn't like a crazy amount of influencers there in Philly that I knew or it's just not like known for that. Yeah. So I didn't have much going on. So I moved up there. And even though we could be anywhere, like I just didn't really. I was like, what am I doing here? I don't have any of my stuff to

like do what I need to do. So it was just harder to kind of get jobs. I was like skipping out, you know, Art Basel is down in Miami. And I was like skipping out on big events that happened in Miami and I just kept like letting things fall through. I kept, you know, job opportunities would come and it would be like out the door. I think there was a little bit of pressure there too, to not necessarily take all of these opportunities from the person I was dating. Yeah. So something would come up and I'd be like, I need to go to New York. And it was kind of like, no, you don't. And I was like, okay. Like shame and blame associated with that? A little bit, yeah. Yeah. So I just kind of started like giving up things that I would never give up before and I don't know why I allowed that

or why I was like letting that happen because again like I love doing this but I was allowing that so me moving in with them is just like I just kind of like was giving up who I created which like I hate because I feel like I've created this beautiful life I have amazing friends I have an amazing job I'm so grateful for everything that I've created and then I start dating someone and I'm like okay everything's gonna go out the door like I wasn't even meeting up with my friends as much as I usually do like I put a huge importance on my friends and I was just like not really seeing them yeah like I gave up everything to be on someone else's schedule and it wasn't making me happy and I was like kind of trying to fight back for it and it was just like sometimes

always an argument where I would just get exhausted and being like okay whatever like you win you know Yeah. And looking back on it, I'm like, why the hell did I do that? Like, why? Like, I'm an idiot. Well, this is why I wanted to bring this up. It's a very interesting intersection of professional navigation in worlds and, like, personal impact. And the way I'm reading the situation is that there was some manipulation to take away the very thing that made you shine. And when that thing went away, it gave that person more control. And on The Chicks in the Office podcast, you kept saying, you know, maybe I'm weak or I can't believe I allowed this. But it was such a an intentional way of how it was done based on what I'm hearing, that it was so calculated

that if your professional shine could be taken away, then your weakness becomes magnified. And that's what I think is so important when you think about just love and money and just career is like making sure that you're with that someone that's bringing you from an eight to a 10 that's encouraging you to be better because it is an absolute form of manipulation to try and control that and then have more ability. to control you because you're not feeling good about what you're doing and who you are professionally. I was definitely being stripped of a lot of things. But again, like, I was allowing it. So that's where like I kind of blame myself and I know I shouldn't. But I was like allowing it to be stripped from me.

And there was definitely points where I would fight back. And I was like, no, like no, no, no. And it was still going in that way. Like I knew he hated what I was doing. I post goofy stuff all the time. I post stupid shit all the time. I look like hell a lot of the times. And I don't. don't really care. But it was always like casting judgment on, oh, why are you posting that? What, you know, what are you doing? Blah, blah, blah. So it's almost like it created a little bit of an insecurity within me where I was like, I just like didn't know what to do anymore because I like could not be myself when it came to posting when I came to this. And it was like, you know, I was like cleaning dishes and doing the housework before I was prioritizing like work stuff or partnerships that I

had. So it was like I was turning into this like housewife. And I was like, no, no, no, I love what I created? So it was like this mental thing going on my head where I'm like, what am I doing? Like that, that aspect is not making me happy right now. I have these opportunities. I want to take advantage of the opportunities that I've created. And I wasn't. And I always knew, though, Jason, I never got rid of my place in Miami. I always knew something was little off. And people would say, Like, why are you spending so much rent in Miami? Why are you spending so much rent in Miami? But I knew something was off and I wasn't going to.

So even though I was never at my apartment in Miami, I kept it as like a safety. So maybe that's a good rule of thumb. Like have a safety net, have an out, have an option. Believe me, I was an expensive one. A really expensive one. One that paid off, though. Yes. One thing I got to bring up is there's a book called Out of the Fog.

And it's dealing with a partnership that feels somewhat, what you're dealing with. And the fog is instilled fear, unnecessary obligation, and guilt. And so it sounds like what he was doing was creating that fog for you. And as a result of it, you're handcuffed. And that impacts your professional success and also just the way you feel about yourself. Did this start to have an impact on you actually financially? Like your earnings and things? Huge. Wow. Like half of what you made the year prior? Yeah. Yeah. I was giving up a lot partnerships a lot so it was constant self-sacrifice yeah interesting a lot all right so and that's why I was like I used to be like I just like saw what I used to be doing and

and I was like oh my God like financially I've just I'm giving up so much and like they would be like great partnership why were you giving them up because it would like start a fight and it would be like I was like hey I got to I have to go to New York I have to do so and so bad but like I was like I got to go to New York I have to do a partnership with smart water sure and great company it's like a dream partnership by the way sure yeah it was great and he's like no I think he had like something else on his plans and he's like no I'll wire you the money he would never wire me the money but he would always say I'll wire the money and I was like what like why am I giving up this opportunity like it was just like he didn't

want me doing it and he would be like we have to do this that and the other and like I just didn't want to start a fight so I would be like okay whatever I'm not going wow okay I'm a big Takeaway guy, if anybody feels that they're going through this in any capacity, where their professional worlds are being constrained, where there's some control, where they're thinking about moving in, give me some Kelly Flanagan, new golden rules. Like what are some golden rules given your experience? Okay, take your time with a moving, have a safety net. What else?

Anything else for a money perspective about like splitting things or not splitting things, anything like that? I have learned throughout a couple of relationships that I pay for a lot of things in relationships. and I'm very generous. When you say pay like financially you pay? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like I'll pick up that entire apartment in Philly. I essentially either got some brand partnerships with it

or a lot of it was my own money that I was just paying. And again... Paying for what? The rent or just everything in there? And not the furniture. But the furniture. Like it would be like, oh, we're going to get this mirror

and it was like, well, that's expensive. And I was like, whatever, I just don't want to start a fight. And I would just like put on my credit card. One of the tough things with that is when you're not married, when you exit, who gets the property? Oh, no, no, no, it's all his. You didn't take any of it? Nothing, not one piece. You're an attorney.

What are we doing? Jason, I just wanted to get out and I didn't. I wanted out. I want a no conversation. I wanted, don't talk to me. Don't ever even look at me. Like, I cut it, whatever. You keep everything that's in there.

Yeah, just don't speak to me alone. But from the little I know, nor am I a psychologist. It feels like there's a little narcissism there. And the best thing to deal with narcissists is just cut it, end it. So I'm happy you did. Let's transition into something that you've been doing online with this transition. You've been talking about the fact that, you know, your parents started late with business, with having you, you're going through this new chapter.

So when you think about just professional endeavors, financial endeavors, of course, tying it back to the podcast, how do you feel and what's some of your inspiration given, like, what you've gone through and your outlook is, you know, becoming a mother and getting a mother and getting married and doing all these dreams that you have while there's been bumps to probably the way you imagined it. Yeah. So I actually just turned 33 last week, two weeks ago. Every birthday? Thank you. I appreciate it. But I think what I was posting, I was recently posting and I told people that my mom and dad had started a lot later in terms of getting married and having children. How late did they start? So my dad was 48 years old.

Wow. Yeah. Your dad was 48 when he got married? He was 48 years old. Your dad's my new inspiration. Yeah, so he was 48 and he used always go around being like, I was a bachelor until 48 years old. Never married before.

Wow. It's actually, it's kind of sad to some degree, but he didn't grow up, like, maybe in the most loving family he was raised by his grandma, his mom, like, wasn't really present. And so, like, I feel like before my dad had it, us, like, he didn't really know, like, a true definition of family or, like, maybe felt that way. Sure. He would always say great things about his dad, but I don't think he was crazy hands-on. Okay. So I think my dad just, like, went through life, and he was like, I'm not really going to get married or have kids.

Like, he wasn't really stuck on that. And then on my mom's side, it was a little complicated. Also, another reason why they started late was my mom is Greek and my dad was not. And my grandma, like, tried to overdose on pills because my mom said she was engaged to a non-Greek guy. Wow. It's that intense. Well, maybe not now, but my mom was, like, born and raised in Greece and, like, a small village. So I don't think, like, her lineage has ever had anyone, like, Marial outside of the Greek community.

Sure. So for her mom, it was very big. It was, like, big news, like, oh, my God, I raised this daughter, and she's going to be the first one in our lineage. to marry outside of the Greek community. So they were dating for a long time, I think almost like eight years. And they were like kind of on and off, not necessarily fully on. But they dated for a while. And then they finally were like, no, we're getting married.

My mom was 36 years old. Wow. My dad was 48. Yeah. And my mom had her first kid at 36 and then had me at 43. So she had six children within seven years. Oh, my gosh. And started at 36 years old, which.

is usually unheard of and every single time I post their stories a lot of girls will reach out and say thank you so much for sharing this is so inspiring I think when you get to you know your 30s and you're a girl I think it's hard not to panic like sometimes you're like oh god like I'm on a biological clock am I going to be able to have children and I mean I'm kind of like sitting in the same position I just turned 33 I'm now recently single I'm not even in a relationship so like when am I going to have kids? I don't really know. But I'm grateful that I do have parents. And especially my mom, they never really pressured us to be like, you have to get married. Like, we want grandbabies. Like, do this. Like, they were always very relaxed. They're like, listen, on your own time. If it happens,

it happens. You'll be very fortunate. But like, don't pressurize yourself. Like, do not put pressure on yourself. And you're going to be okay. So I think it's a good mentality where I haven't necessarily freaked out so much to be like, I need to have kids right now. My norm is my mom had me at 43 years old. So I'm like, okay, like, I know I'm getting a little bit older, but I'm also not freaking out because what I'm used to. Sure. You know, my norm is different from everyone else. But it goes to show you, like, anyone, girls, if you're in your 30s, like, don't panic.

My parents' story is there. All six of us kids are fine. Five out of the six of us are attorneys. Like, we're all healthy. And she started at 36 and had me at 43, seven years. You know, within seven years, I had six kids, and all of us are healthy. And I don't think either one of them would have wanted it any other way. My dad financially loved it because he was like, by that time, I was, like, established.

Like, he started his own law firm, and he was able to be financially free to some degree. Did he start that firm all by himself? Yeah. Wow. Yeah. There's another guy that helped him, but it's not necessarily a partner. It was like a guy. It was an employee.

but they were like besties. It's called Flanning and Bilton, so the other guy's name is Bilton. But yeah, he started the law firm, and that takes a lot of time. You're grinding in order to become successful. And he did, and he was able to become successful. So by the time he started having kids,

it was like one less stressor on him. Sure. You know, he was like, I mean, six kids financially, that's we bulldozed him. but he was always very like whatever you guys want would like try to give us whatever we wanted and yeah he he wouldn't want it another way because he was like it just took one stressor out you know financially i was like okay i could do this yeah i know finances within a relationship could be really tough and it's a lot of fights so i loved the way we were able to do it you know

i know they started later but it was like beautiful to me yeah do you think i mean that awesome inspiration, like you're continuing to live his legacy through, and then you have your mom there cheering you on, and you have so many people looking up to you saying, that's right, I could be 33 and crush my profession and everything's going to be okay. It's going to be fine. I've had this conversation with other people from the show, and there's always interesting perspectives on it and interesting takes from people listening. But do you think at all, reality TV, the creator space, this whole media entertainment space, do you at all think that it might have derailed you from a different life you might be living at this point?

Yeah, I mean, my life would be definitely different. Do you think at this point you'd be married with kids if you didn't go on reality TV? Okay, so I'm going to answer this in two different ways. Okay. Because I've seen you ask this question before. I actually had a conversation with Evan about it. I think the guys in the franchise are different from the girls. Okay.

How so? Because the fan base is girls. for you guys I think it's a little bit harder like I've been out when I used to date Peter and I was always with the boys the fan base reacts differently to the guys and they really do to the girls what do you mean by that

you guys date the people that are usually like watching the show like the fan base a lot of the guys who I would say we probably date like maybe haven't even really watched the show or like crazy fans don't know so much about it aren't like really involved with drama they're more so out so it's not like it's different for us because it's like the guys that

we're usually dating aren't like intertwined to some degree yeah with you guys there's a lot of girls that you know they're all like cool girls and they're like around our age and stuff like that and usually they're sometimes like a fan of the show so it's like you go try and date a girl and she knows all of your business she knows everything it's probably hard for you or like, who can I trust? Like, is this someone who, like, wants to know all of my deepest secrets? And they're going to go out and share it with other people that I don't want my business. Do you not feel that, though?

Not really. It's different for the girls, I feel like. Okay. Interesting. I think it's pretty different for the girls. Like, to be honest, my last relationship, we barely ever talked about the show. A lot of guys that I feel like we date aren't going to be as intertwined. Sure.

I just don't. But I feel like for you guys, it's something. little bit different. Yeah, I think it's, I think maybe, yeah, I think if the, if the, if the, if the, if the viewing audience is, I guess mostly women, it adds different when I was, like, challenges when I would go out with the boys. Yeah. It was just different from when I went out with the girls. Yeah. The fan base. The girls, like, is it like, they get more excited about the boys than they do about the girls. And, and there's like, maybe, I don't know what it is. This is maybe, like, they have potential to date you guys with us. They don't have

potential like well maybe like if you're you know well if you're what if you're into that oh okay I don't know if you're referring to someone specifically or something okay that was a little eyebrow pop right there but do you see what I mean yeah I think I think there's I think suppose there's a lot of moving parts when it's I guess a women-based viewing audience right like if I if I suppose I was to date someone that has no idea what the show is even if they have no idea right like your situation and then online there's still 97% of people that are following you that are women like how will they react to that is maybe a different there's definitely going to be girls out there that don't know like that don't know of the show

of course yeah yeah but i would say the percentages are going to be lower than the guys okay so your thesis let me get your thesis here you think it makes sense why some of the guys might have come on my show and said that reality TV and media pushed back their expected timeline as to like where they would be. And you're saying for majority of the women on the show, you think like that's, that's not as applicable. Yeah. Okay.

All right. That's fair. And then, but also there's like for that situation, I think it might be a little bit harder for you guys to date after the, after the show. Whoever's listed in this pocket. Dating is just hard. Like, like, new, this new, this like nude dating thing. Like, it's, it's, it's, it's a whole different fucking ballgame out there.

And it's like, I find that dating is like a full-time job. Yeah. Do you feel that way? Yeah. It's a lot. That's why I don't understand, like, cheaters. Like, how are, how do you have the time? That's a whole different conversation.

And, well, the thing about, like, the time and effort. Yeah. Like, in your last relationship. Like, like, how, like, just break up. If you're going to cheat, just break up. Yeah. Right? What are you doing?

But I will be honest, okay, that's my first answer. I feel like it's a little bit more difficult for you guys than it is for us. Okay. Second answer is yes, I do think we were also pushed back in weird ways because we are given a lot of like really cool opportunities. I remember when we first got off the show, it was like me, Victoria, Kelsey, and we're like flying to St. Barts and like doing some of the coolest things that we would probably never get to experience without being on the show. So I think initially, right when we got off the show, we were prioritizing the social media world and doing all that, trying to figure it out, trying to learn, trying to do all this, that, yeah, that probably pushed us back because our priorities were a bit different. Right. But then also, too, here's another one.

There's been guys who I'm like great friends with, and they're not trying to offend me in any degree. They're like amazing friends. A lot of guys don't necessarily love the publicity of what we're doing. and he was like, I love you girls. Like, you girls are amazing, but I could never date you guys. And I was like, I don't take that offensively at all. I really don't. I don't think that's offensive.

Like, I mean, I'll speak to, like, my situation. The idea of dating someone again in the public eye is, like, absolutely terrifying. Even if I'm going, like, suppose I'm going on a date with someone and they are in the public eye. Like, I would rather just not be anywhere where anyone is because when things don't work out, I think I'm, like, traumatized by it. I'm like, it's just a lot. Imagine this, right? Yeah. Your last, your last boyfriend.

Yeah. From what I know, he deserved every little thing that you put out there and good for you. You should. And you empowered a lot of people that are going through the same thing, to do the same thing, call them out and speak. And that is beautiful. No one should be silenced. But like the idea these days that like someone can go on a podcast and like your career is ruined if you step left to right the wrong way, that's terrified. And that's like the world that we live in right now. It's wild. But at the end of the day, Jason, if you're a good person, that's true. Listen, I would never go on a podcast and ruin someone's like name, like literally go in. Listen, you know I could say so much worse than what I've said. Oh yeah. Like I literally just scratched the surface and you know that. But I would never go on and ruin someone's name if they were a good person. Correct. So at the end of the day, Jason, if you're dating a girl. And at the end of the day, you're just a good person. And at the end of the day, you're just a good person.

like you're not doing things like listen everyone's going to screw up in some always yeah but like at the end of the day if you're just striving to be a good person I do think your karma comes back I don't think someone's gonna go on and say you're a piece of shit this that and the other you know like I genuinely think that people only do that if you are horrible human being well and if if well I mean I've seen a lot of your situation hang out your situation fully warranted as someone that like we run a talent management see and that I've been in in this space. I've definitely seen people take things out of context that are completely untrue

to put themselves in a better position. Oh, that's sad. You did not do that. But what I have found exactly to your point is that if there's not merit to what is said, the wind behind the sails will stop and the sailboat won't keep going because there's no validity to it. Right? Like that is a that is a real thing. It's a very, very real thing. So that's a wild world. We're talking all things. Now, the next career stop for you. Let me ask you, you're single, you're 33. We know that the Bachelorette season got pushed back, but Bachelor in Paradise is coming up.

Would you ever make that career move? Would you go on Paradise? No. They reached out to me, and I just don't necessarily think it's moved for me. And, again, like, I'm sitting here being like, I'm 33, whatever. But I do feel like the show is maybe geared to a little bit younger than. me. So I told them, I was like, I just feel like I'm a little bit old for Paradise. You know, maybe if I was like 25 right now, it could be fun. But what, like I would need guys who are,

I don't know, minimum 35 years old. I mean, fine, 33, call it maybe even a little bit younger. Would you not date younger? I don't think I've ever really like done that. It's not anything against it. I haven't dated, I haven't seriously dated someone younger than me. I don't know. I don't know why I'm I don't know I don't know about that one but I told them I was like you guys are casting the golden bachelor guy sure sign me up yeah she was dying she was like you're not old stop it you're like put a bronze bachelor in there yeah someone in the middle but I do think I'm just at this point that's funny where I was like okay I'm actually serious about settling down yeah I don't think I really was crazy as about it before, but now I'm starting to get to a point where I'm like, I actually want that. Do you think your peer group? Like, if you look at the people that are your age from the

vatorette that are getting asked to go in Paradise, are thinking similarly to you or no? I mean, I think I just know from my friend's experience, but both of them, you know, Victoria Kelsey, they already went on it. But like, do you know, so you got some feelers out there with people? Like, are people that are in their 30s thinking the same thing you're thinking? I don't know, because my season, you have Hannah Ann who's married, you have Maddie who's married. I'm great friends with Victoria.

She's already done it. Kelsey's already done it. Like, so the ones that are already in my circle is the ones that, like, I talk to and I know. Gotcha. I don't know what their perception is. Is there anything that they could do to get you on that beach? I was just telling her. I was like, to me, it just didn't, like, make sense.

One, I don't even know if I'm, like, 100% ready to start dating just because, like, my dad's stuff. I don't think you should really go into a relationship when you're mentally, like, like not your strongest. Yeah. And I know that's kind of my situation right now. So I haven't been like super eager to jump in there. Jump in, you know, they're going to be like, how's your life? And I'm going to be like, well, my life's been in shambles.

Anyways, how's your life? Like, you know what I mean? Like, what do I really talk about? I'm still not like strong enough and myself to like give what I want to give to someone. Yeah. You're going through it right now. I could feel it. Like the second I saw you, like your energy.

It's not, it's not like this typical. Kelly energy. Yeah. And you're, I know that you're going through. As a friend of yours, I could feel that. Yeah. But like, you are going to you break through in so many unbelievable ways. Like this time is like, it's going to develop a whole different Kelly Flanagan and it's coming. And just that answer, like, I know I'm not there yet. And when I am there, it's going to be like glorious and you're going to get there and it's going to be unbelievable. Yeah. And I feel for what you're going through because it's, that's a lot. It's a lot. And when you come out of this, it's going to be watch the fuck.

how here she comes. Kelly Flanagan. Speaking of watch the fuck out. All right. Last time you're on this podcast, it's a beauty of having people on your podcast. You get to listen to what happened then versus what happened now. Yeah.

And people brought it up when I asked them for questions. You talked a lot about the fact how like, you know, you're not a big bag girl. Like you didn't, you know, buy bags not your thing. At that time in 2022, you didn't own one Chanel bag. And then you go viral on TikTok because you have a Chanel bag. Some, you know, someone spills wine on it totally gets. the bag in good shape, but then he sends you the bag. And everyone's asking me, one, what is the status of Kelly with her bags and two? Is she going on a date with this guy who bought her a

Chanel bag? How much does this Chanel bag cost? Five grand? Five grand. I think it was like 50 grand. So for people that don't know, this guy spills wine on your bag. Correct. Okay. And did it ruin your bag? No. Not at all. No. Okay. So this is more of the story. I'll try to give some details here, but I also, I know he wants to stay private, so I have to respect that. But I went, it was like around Super Bowl time, we were at a table just like this, and he spilled a glass, like literally waterfalled on my bag. And I was like, oh, my God, it was like a burnt orange color. I should have brought it today.

I have it here. And I thought it was going to get in like the stitching and the seams, and I was like, this thing is ruined, completely ruined, red wine all over this bag. And I picked it up, immediately wiped it off. It was good. But he also had friends there, like mutual friends, and they were giving him such a hard time. So they're like, you ruined her bag, blah, blah, blah. I just feel like that kind of friend group would have never let him hear it down if they're like,

you're so, you know, you did this and you ruined her bag and whatever. So they were giving him a hard time. And I told him, I was like, no, it's good, it's good. And he bought me a bag and sent it to me. Did you go on one date with him? No, no. Like, actually? He's just like out of the goodness of his heart.

He's like, even though the bag was perfectly fine. The bag was perfectly fine. Wow, what a gentleman. Yes, I. Unbelievable. Standing owner of this guy. Is he single? He is single.

Why don't you go on to date with him? He is a friend of my brothers and my brothers. I don't think they would appreciate it. Interesting. Are you interested? He's a, listen, I've known him for years. I think he's interested. I don't know.

I'm not going to ask him. But I've known him for years. He's an amazing guy. He's a great guy. I think if that ever happened, my brothers would not be thrilled. Interesting. Yeah. All right.

But if it's your person, they should support it. All right, let's go. Let's transition to this. The last time you're on the podcast, too, you talked about your law work. You wanted to be. Well, wait. I didn't acknowledge, yes, I've been buying Chanel's. I said last time.

Oh, last time you weren't a bagger. You said your mom would kick your ass if you were buying these bags. She would. girl and it's really bad now what what is it the is it income is it more disposable income so right when I got off the show I think my priorities changed a little bit I wanted to save as much money as I can I was living out of my parents you said last time sorry to interrupt you said that every single dollar you made from influencing was saved and invested that was 22 as I did and then once I felt like I was comfortable enough to have like enough invested I was like okay why not I'm I think I was

31, 32, it was my gay best friend and he was like, you do not have a nice bag. Okay. Like, you were in your 30s, like, shape up. Like, and I was like, I don't know what that even means, but he really wanted me to have a nice bag. And he kind of manipulated me and he took a bite of the apple. And then once that happened, I was like, wait, this is actually cool. I love this. What was your first bag?

I think this one actually. I purchased this one myself. Okay. And how much does that cost? I think six. Six. And like, does this, can you sell that for more than six right now or no? Like, is there any appreciation?

That, that I'm, yes. Well, no, I don't know. I know they hold their value well. Yeah. But I don't know. The Hermes bags, definitely. Yeah, those do, right? Yeah, those do.

I don't know about Chanel, but I know they hold their value. How many bags got now? Now that this guy. From zero to. I'm not a great one. She's a bad girl now. Four, because he just bought me that one. Okay, four.

Okay, so not like a crazy amount, but I had three. Okay. Question for you. Yes. Finances. We're talking finances here. You making much more now than you were as an attorney? Yes.

Yeah. And how much are you making as an attorney? When I first got there, I think I was like, well, okay, this is where it gets confusing. Okay. So when I am an attorney, it was, I think we talked about this last time, but we have like a weird thing of how we're splitting it. So we essentially have a little bit of ownership. My dad said, you know, if you guys.

want to work at the law firm. If you want to have ownership of the law firm, then go to law school and all of that stuff. So I had a percentage of it. I have a percentage of the law firm. So our salaries were always shot. That's right. You said that. Yeah. So that's why it was, I don't, to be honest, I don't even know what it was, but it was like, I don't know, maybe 100,000, but the way we do things was. But I remember you saying comparative to other institutions and other law firms at that level in Chicago with like your education background, you were making far less than what they were because of the equity? Far less.

Right. Because it was like other things. Like, you know, the, we were, our rent was taken care of our, a lot of our bills were taken care of all that stuff and then we would get like a shit salary, which was fine. Yeah. Totally worked, you know. But I can't even remember specifically what it was. I think it was even less than that, but it was like kind of all of our bills, our cars, our

rent, all that stuff's taken care of. of you don't get a crazy salary, you're new here, you also get a percentage. I would take that any day, you know what I mean? But it wasn't, it wasn't. And my dad also didn't want to like to come in and being like, here you guys go, like you get everything. It was more so of work your ass off and work your way up.

Like you're not coming in here getting paid more than the person who's been working here for several years. Like he was hard on us to be like, if you want to work here, you work and we'll eventually like keep increasing your salary if you're doing a good job. He wanted us to come in, like at a very low level and work ourselves up, which I actually really respect. That makes sense. Yeah.

Have since, now in 2022, we talked a little bit about the social media thing and we're like, who knows, like, what the future holds? I know you had a year with, well, your relationship you weren't making as much of, but have you at all come close to what you're making that? Or have you always superseded it in this space? For what I was making as an attorney, yeah. Oh, no, I've always superseded. Always. And back in 2022, you were like, who knows what the future holds? It's now 2025.

2025, what do you, like, what's your outlook with this? Like, what's your goal? What's your dream? Where do you think it's going? So this sounds really bad, but I am, how do I explain this? I'm not someone who really, like, plans ahead. Like, if someone came and was like, what's your plan for the next five years? I've never been that way.

Yeah. Like, even when I was going to law school, some of my other siblings knew from, I don't know, 10 years before they were going to law school that they're going to law school. Mine was kind of like a last minute decision where I was like, you know, maybe a year and a half before. I was like, you know what? I'm going to decide to go to law school. And then I had to start studying. But I'm not this person who like has a five-year plan. And I always just say, I was like, it always just works out for me. And it's true. I mean, listen, my life's in shambles currently. I'm trying to get over that. But yeah, but things have just like happened to me

where it just like always works out. So I don't put like a lot of pressure on myself because I don't think there's something where I'm like, I have to be doing this. But there's like cool job opportunities that come my way that I'm like it's pretty cool it's try it out went on the bachelor like random you know I would have never thought I would do that so there I went from being an attorney to then going on the bachelor to then doing the influencing stuff like my life has turned a lot in a lot of different directions and I feel like if I put pressure on myself it would stress me out so much where I'd be like oh my god it was supposed to go there and it went there so maybe I'm not I'm not really good at like planning for the future it's more of let's take things day by day

opportunity as opportunity and let's see okay people always ask me too they're like would you get back into law and i was like maybe like i'm not letting my law degree go who knows if there's like some kind of position that opens up you know i know instagram and all the statistics and all the analytics and how all that stuff works who knows if something with that in law like a job comes into play where i'm like okay cool let's do something here you know i don't think many lawyers would know the back ends of Instagram, maybe they would. But like, I don't know. So you're vibing out. You're trying to, you'll see what happens. You're in the space. You're doing well in the space. And you're just like, let's see what's next with it. Do you have one thing you want to accomplish? Like, do you want

a signature line? Do you want to write a book? Do you want to be an actress? Do you want to go on another reality show? Do you have like anything that you're like, this is one thing I really do want to do while this space is still healthy and well? There is something. And I'm not going to talk about it because it's a bit complicated right now, but there is something you're working on or something that you have an eye on? Correct. Is it ownership, something you have ownership in? Yes, yes. Is it peril? No. Is it jewelry? No. Are you doing it with other people? Yes, am I? Is it like other creators? No. Can you mean anything at all? Nothing at all? It's if I get into it, then I'm going to have to get into it, which I really don't want to get into

right now. I won't push you. I won't push you. Yeah. Tease it. But I don't want to. But I don't want to. because like it's going to get really fucking messy right now okay let's not tease it then all all right talk to me about this other reality TV shows are there any shows if they called you right now you'd be like I'm in and what shows no not really do you're done no you want to know one that I reached out to right when I got off the show for some reason I am very into lineage stuff and there was a show I think Hillary Duff went on it I don't even know what it's cold but it was like they do a crazy amount of work on your family and they go trace back like where you're from

you go. I think she went to Ireland and found out that she used to be in like a royal family. Okay. And it's like through lineage. I remember I got off the show and I wanted to go on it so bad. I was like, how cool would that be to go like fly and being like, your great, great, great grandpa is this person. I don't know why I've always been obsessed with it. Okay. That's cool. Actually, 23 and me, we found out a couple years ago that my dad had two half brothers. He had no idea about it. Oh, wow. Yeah. And I'm not going to say the next one because it might complicate things in family. But, yeah. So I've always just been obsessed with 23 and me and lineage and all that stuff.

And I don't even know if that show exists anymore, but I thought it'd be cool. All right. Maybe that would be cool. Has any show ever knocked on your door other than Paradise? There's another dating one right now that's been. Is it a new one or is an existing one? No. Interesting.

Yeah. Are you thinking about doing it? Potentially. We'll see. Give me percentage. It's not. 30%. No, I would actually, higher, actually higher.

50%, more like a 75 just because it's not, it's not crazy filming. It's, yeah. What is crazy filming mean? It's just, it's, yeah. What would you define as crazy filming? It's not extensive. Is love island crazy? No, no.

Oh, you're talking about length. Length. Length of time. Yeah, yeah, it would just be like fast and funny and yeah. Okay, once I heard you say that you think you might be too old to be the Bachelorette 33 because we already talked a little bit about. The fact, do you like older men? If they came to you next season and they said, whatever age men you want, we're going to do it, would you be the Bachelorette?

I don't, I don't, I don't know. I don't think so. Wow. Interesting. Listen, I like. So you're done with the Bachelorette. It's done. Kind of.

Kelly Flanagan retired. This is why. Listen, I'm always like. With Bachelor. A lot more things that you're not retired. Yeah. I don't regret that I did The Bachelor. When I do it again, I don't know.

that's like a big big question but also how do I say this when I got off the show it like caused a lot of anxiety and stress and I was very anxious it was a lot for me like I kind of like the position I am in now but you kind of go through a lot of trauma and it's like one am I ready to sign up for that again right now absolutely not to what I be ready to like want to go through that amount of attention and trauma and all that stuff that you have to work through from a year from now, I don't know. Like, it's a lot. It's a lot.

It's a lot. It's a lot. I got one last question on the whole topic of your journey in this space is if there's one thing you can do different from when you went on the show to now, what's one thing you would have done differently? as it connects to the show or just this space business-wise or personally, too? I mean, the way Peter and I started dating was one of the messiest things that you could get together with someone. So that caused a lot of stress. Maybe not as dramatic. Maybe not as messy.

Maybe. Maybe. Maybe a little bit calmer. A little bit more of a smooth sailing ride. All right. Let's end with this. So it's been a big topic on your social media. We've already talked about it. But wrap us up with this. One thing, someone is too, they think they're too late to the game. Starting a business, getting married, having kids, whatever it might be, they just think they're too late. It's been a part of your theme here.

So what's the biggest piece of advice you'd give to those people? Business, personally, professionally, whatever it is. To be honest, be easy on yourself. To be easy on yourself, don't put much pressure on yourself. And if you're going after your dream, go after it. Like, take advantage of all of your advantage. My mom always says that to me. She was like, take advantage of your advantages.

If it's there, like, come on, Kel. So just be easy on yourself. Go after what you want, do what you love, and go after your dreams. You know, people, what did they say? Oprah started at like 40 years old with her talk show. There's so many other people that created a massive success, not early on, and that's fine. Just be easy and go after what you want, and you could start at any age. I love it.

advice last question i got for your training secret you said go up to your dream i know it's hard for you to predict in the future but like what is the dream for kelly i don't know what the dream is what do you think it is Kelly planning his life is in shambles the dream is don't be in shambles is that the dream the dream is focus on yourself right now i don't know i mean listen i do want to have kids i do want to have a family i would love that i also like having something that i can independently do for myself and it brings me joy. It brings me a purpose. I think people having a purpose for themselves is huge. And so I think that's why I love what I do is because I'm like, you know, I have a purpose and I don't ever want to give that away. So I don't know what it's

going to look like. Right now I'm just focusing on myself and trying to get there. I can't wait because it's going to work. It's going to be beautiful. It's going to be awesome. And when it does, you're coming back on because it's going to be there. You're going to hear your now like I just got to get through the shambles and you're going to and it's going to be fucking perfect so it's coming I'm telling you the breakout is coming and I love where you're at given what you've gone through and not only where you're at but the things you're doing for other people that are in those spots and don't know how to get out you're really helping a lot of people out and you should be proud of that all right trading secret what can you leave us with

Kelly one trading secret from Kelly Flanagan I always say education is the biggest thing well listen education but knowledge yeah knowledge is the biggest thing and that's one thing unfortunate that my dad again my parents never pressured us but my dad was always big on he was like listen at the end of the day he would talk to us about going to law school and he was like the only thing I could give you guys like help me feel secure about you guys and like know that you guys are gonna be okay is he was like if you guys want to go and further your education he was like it makes me sleep easy at night which was the biggest gift that I

like he can give us, you know, like at the end of the day, something happens with influencing, I can go back to law, you know? It's not only that. It just helps me in like an everyday setting. I feel like my brain used to think in a more disorganized way. And going to law school, I learned how to really solidify thoughts and focus on one thing that's being asked and all of this stuff. So I think it just teaches you how to think differently. So I think knowledge is just huge. Like, I need to be with a partner who intellectually stimulates me. Sure. I need it.

Yeah. So I think just try to educate yourself and that doesn't mean having to go to extra school, reading books, all of this stuff, like just trying to learn. Yeah. I think it's really huge. I think it's great. It reminds me a little bit about your apartment in Miami. It's a safety net.

Like you're an attorney by law, like you're educated. You can do whatever you want, however you want, and that confidence. I chirp my cost my MBA all the time, but I know no matter what. If this whole thing dies tomorrow, I know I can go get a, great job at a large corporation. It's a safety net. And that confidence also gives you the ability to move forward in your career at a different speed and a different trajectory.

So that is great, Kelly. Kelly, where can everyone find everything you have going on? Instagram at Kelly Flanagan. Okay. And then TikTok at Kelly Flanagan as well. Amazing. And when, do we, you know, something's brewing here. Do we have a time of when this is popping?

What? Your thing that you teed that you couldn't tease. Oh, oh, oh. It's a little messy right now. So we'll see. A potential date maybe this summer. Maybe. Okay. Stay tuned to her Instagram and TikTok. Kelly Flanagan, thank you so much for coming back on trading secrets. Appreciate it. Thanks for having me, Jay. You killed it. Ding, ding, ding. We are closing in the bell to the Kelly Flanagan episode. One of David Ardoin's favorite humans from all bachelor nations. So I know he is lick at his chops getting ready for this recap. I'm sure he's got a lot of thoughts. So curious Canadian, bring it in high.

How are we feeling? What'd you think? Where are we at? Feeling great. Sunday night ritual. It's becoming for you and I recapping, which is it's just the nice little highlight to end my week. And we got Kelly Flanagan in the hot seat.

And like you said, huge Kelly Flan for those for a little background. I met Kelly a couple times. She always just makes like, she's just, it might sound like weird, but she's so normal. Like she's the most normal person in that of Bachelor nation,

where you'd have no idea that she was, you know, on the show or not just like someone that you're meeting of a friend of a friend. We went to a Kigo concert with her and Pete and Evan, and that's when we did our first, like, announcement to everybody that we were pregnant. And so she was there for that. It was just a great time. But, yeah, she's great. I'll listen to any podcast that she's on and she represents vaccination well.

And you and her have, I'd say, good chemistry. Good chemistry on the on the on the on the on the on the mic there jay what do you have she's great she's dead like she's just awesome she's easy to be around she's funny she's kind she's sweet she's smart uh she's great she's great so yeah you you thought we had good chemistry huh yeah yeah actually i got to bring this up because i'm curious i'm just going to come out the gates swing in here she talked she talked about um some work project she sounded pretty excited about that she was teasing. She said it would be messy if she

talked about it. So I am on the edge of my seat curious to what that is. But then you said right after, at the end of the podcast, after Trading Secret, you said maybe we'll, maybe we'll have a potential date this summer. Were you referring to

a date of what when we'll hear about a project? Did you just slyly say, hey, maybe we'll have a potential date this summer? like I need to know because the people need to know too you're like us weekly taking things out of context I'm voice of the viewer here

I said what like do you have a potential date like not like no you said what did I say you said so can we count on a potential date this summer something like that something along those lines it's very sly put in at the very end of the episode and you know you call you got to run it back Let's put John here right now.

John, play the clip right now. I wonder what it is. Let the people hear it. But you play it right now. A potential date, maybe this summer. Maybe. All right, we just picked it back up. Well, let me just clear it up.

I was referring to, I'm referring to the project. But you know, who knows, David? Hey, you guys, you mentioned a bunch in the episode, how good of friends that you guys were. And sometimes the best relationships come from people who start as friends. But I'm not going to force it. I'm not going to push it. I would be a fan of it.

Regardless, she will always be, you know, one of our favorite guests that we have and she'll always be... You would be a fan of it. You would, you would push,

you would push this, I feel like. I'd push it. Yeah. If I was allowed to push it, if it was, if I could, you know,

do the, where you buy it, where you want to push a post on social media and you put some money, I would push this. I would push it forward. You would boost us?

I would boost it. I would boost it. sure so Kelly if you're listening to this no pressure but I'd be a fan of it if you're looking for support and I feel like others would do but that's neither here nor there um yeah that's that's that's that's I just wanted to do my due diligence there and just kind of push it over the edge and see what you were referring to thing well there could be we are talking about I will say this We're talking about getting a rewired talent management house in the Hamptons this summer. And she was like, I want to, like, I want to be part of it.

I'm down to throw it. Like I'm down to chip in, whatever it is. So like, yeah, maybe, you know, we'll be doing the Hamptons this summer. And that excites me because I think some good content would happen and not because I'm pushing you guys being together. Truly, I hope it happens because I will say from. having met her a couple times and obviously last time she was on the podcast she definitely and i texted you right after i listened i was like i just feel bad because she definitely she definitely is down like she's definitely lost a piece of her she's definitely lost a little bit

of i don't even want to say her confidence because it's not her confidence i think no i think it's just had a really hard time and and for those who haven't you know listened to that chicks in the office episode about her breakup i mean the guy is is a scumbag control feet manipulator um disgusting Um, and so, you know, my hope is that she does things like the shared house or does things that like you said, focuses on her again and she gets back on her feet because we're definitely rooting for her 100%. We are rooting for her. Uh, she will get back on her feet. I know that's the kind of person she is. Uh, and it's just a tough string of stuff like between the breakup and then, you know, losing her dad and just a lot of, a lot of things, but like she's a fighter.

She is great. She is, she is going to be, like I said, it's going to be a massive. breakthrough and I could already like feel it I could already feel it coming for her so yeah we keep in touch man I talked to Kelly like I would take Kelly and I talk on the phone at least like once a week catching up especially in the last like month or so so like I already feel like I heard I caught up last week and I already feel like things are are looking up she's obviously you do work for her on the talent agency side right yeah yeah okay good love it yeah yeah yeah we like we need we we we Oh, no. Now we're talking business, Jay. Come on. Turn the page here. We're talking business. All right. What? What are you doing? Oh, what are we doing? What are we doing here? Are we dancing? Are you and I dancing?

It's a shame we don't dance about. It's a shame we don't record the recaps for the pupil there because we're doing a little. We're doing a little eye. It's like an eye war right now. Where are you going with it? All right, David. I'm back in the middle of our recap. My, uh, My memory card said it was full. So I went to Walgreens and here I am. Yeah. Yeah, my memory card. We've done 315 episodes and the first time your memory card is full is when I'm absolutely putting in the hot seat.

Saved by the memory card. Like saved by the bell. Listen, we're off that. Let me just clear it up for the people. I am doing my job here as Voice of the Viewer. I'm asking the questions that you guys want to know. So thank you for entertaining my questions. Oh, yeah.

My pleasure. That's what we're here for it, David. that's what you know what else we're here for i don't know what the hell's going on with these recaps but it feels like every recap since january something is said that makes a headline last week it was my back i talked about my back all week on my instagram no one said a word you and i start talking about in the recap boom boom bang bang it was i fucking it was on e news my back what the hell's going on well maybe maybe it's an internal little challenge for me that you aren't uh pick that you know to get on the headlines so any dates last week jay

eight eight um no actually it's kind of sad i didn't go i was working like a like a sicko last week i went shocker shock i did seventh wheel on yes which was very fun very interesting a lot of interesting talk out of seventh wheel with three couples eight total kids that was interesting that was good content that was good content you liked it i did i did i'm starting to if you can tell i'm starting to really care less about what I put out there. Yeah, it's way better too. I'm like, ah, fuck it. Let's talk about married couples bitching about not wearing or wearing condoms. I mean, it's wild. Like, I just didn't even think that that was like, I thought that was like one of the perks about like getting married is so you never have to wear a condom again ever. So,

so you don't wear a condom. Oh, no, it'd be a one way street to like divorce if that was. I am in like, I am a condom king it's good for you yeah like as a single guy like if that those things ever do ever

I feel so weird talking about this shit but like yeah I'm big on wearing like in relationships no but like yeah yeah congrats on the sex

thanks what are you talking about who are you talking about? I'm not I'd say I'm just saying congrats because that's great. I'm happy to know that when the situation occurs like that's good. Do I wear a condom? Yeah.

Yeah, I'm a condom king. Yeah, it's great. That's good. It's a good title. Yeah. You got a shock. Shocker, if that doesn't make a headline, I'm the condom king. Jason Tartick. I really hope it doesn't. I'd throw up. Oh, God. This is great. Great.

Jason crawls on for the hospital with a broken back. and claims Condom King Well, I will say the conversation that you had with Kelly about the dating dilemmas

in the bachelor world between guys and girls when you get off the show. I thought that was interesting. It was actually interesting to hear her take. Me too, because I was shocked.

I didn't think, I have no, you know, like the whole like gender specific, like the guys versus a girls type thing. Like I don't, I never thought about it

or nor do I have a take on that. It was interesting to hear her take. Her take makes sense from the fact of, like, I feel like the next person you date, there's a 90% of chance they'll know that you were on a show. If not before they met you, you know, fairly, fairly soon. I feel like if Kelly, for an example, dates someone the next, I think there's a 30% chance, 20% chance that they know that she was on the show before meeting her. I think, okay, I see what you're saying. So I think that's where she was coming from from the sense of like it's harder for you guys

because you're meeting someone that has this preconceived notion of who you are, what you are, why they might be with you, et cetera, where she can date a little more freely without having that in the back of her head. That's, I think, what she was saying by making it more challenging. Speaking of which I have lately, we've got to get back to a Kelly episode, but whether it's me going on a date or me meeting somewhat. new or like just the amount of people that I'm like I had a preconceived knowledge of like what you'd be like and you are so much better than what I'm not saying that to be like cool

but I'm like well like you're they're like you're funnier you're nicer you're like you're like you're so sweet I didn't expect blah blah blah I'm not trying to put my tires here I promise what I'm trying to get at is I'm like what I was like well why is do you have that preconceived knowledge like is it my content is it reality TV is a bachelor like why did you have this preconceived thing that I was something that like I wasn't in person. That's kind of through me, you know? Especially when they think, well, especially when they think you're 5'9 and then you show up and you're six foot. It's like, yeah, no, it makes, it makes perfect sense. But that's exactly

what Kelly, I think, was referring to because if 90% of the people know you were on reality, that means there's 90% of the people while dating you are already have a notion or have read something or click something or heard this or that where that's part of it too. I also think that that is also the best part about dating. If there's anything that I miss from dating, it's being able to learn and hear how people got to where they are. Like everyone's truly got such a different story. And the good dates are the ones that like someone captivates you simply by how they've lived

their life, what their story is, what their experiences are. It's nothing materialistic, flashy. It's not their job. It's not their career. Those things aren't really that engaging on the first few dates. it's like oh my god this person cool story ever yeah yeah i agree i agree all right it was an interesting it was an interesting conversation interesting take from her perspective i think people have a lot of opinions on that what else did you hear from kelly the guy you think and got

you buzzing yeah i mean it i was a little upset for her um for to hear how much you know deals that she was turning away from from her ex and i kind of alluded to that at the start are you is she back on you is she back in there i know how that i know that's yeah that feels like oh yeah but is she back are you able to get her deals is her you know is her value despite kind of going into the abyss for a little bit on the on the career side is her value still really high from you know from that perspective she's doing a great job she's really doing a good job on ticot too uh which is which is helping her uh with her social stuff so it's it's easy to pitch her uh we just got a really cool deal actually with visit anaheim where she went uh on saw that lane yeah with with the

anaheim tourist board she went on the plane with the anaheim ducks to nashville to watch the preds game she brought her sister her nephew who's a huge hockey fan and then one of our agents went with her then they flew back and they had a great time so yeah there's a lot of active deals and yeah kelly is still very very much uh wanted to work uh brands very very very very much want to work with Kelly. That's awesome. I mean, she's got, listen, she's got, she got great style. She's people like her.

She's got an engaged community. And yeah, she's, she's doing good. And it was just so, you know, commend her so much for being so raw and open about how she is struggling. I think you could, if you clip like her saying, my life's in shambles, you could make like a little like new techno remix off it because she literally of all the little clips and cuts because she probably said my life's in shambles. gambles 15 times in the episode, which she's not shying away from and kind of leaning into

it, which I think will help lead her to the next best big thing, like you kept mentioning that I think will happen for her, no doubt. It will. She's great. Future is bright for her. And that's like, to her point, it's interesting. I actually had a phone call with Joey tonight when we talked for a while. There's a, there's a, the whole five-year plan, which we talked about in this episode.

Yeah. it's really tough in our industry and our space like what is the next play what does it look like what do you want it to be how big of an impact does it have you know you go on another show what does that do like that's a big topic of conversation is like what's next and it's kind like that it's healthy and unhealthy are you a five year plan guy or were you i feel like you were maybe you're not now i was i feel like i was and i'm not now and i think i need to go back to that at least like a two-year plan, you know? I live, I was saying this again recently. I live so grossly below my means, like grossly below my means. Oh, yeah. Like, so I have done financially

well, as people know on the podcast where I talk about it, but like I don't spend much at all. As a result of that, it allows me to take the wealth that I built and make a good amount of money on it. And I don't know, man. I'm fucking tired. I'm like, I don't know. I need a break. Like in five years, I can't do this. You know what my five year plan is, dude? Honestly, five years, please for the love of God, give me the fortune, health, and happiness

to be married with a couple kids. That would be a dream, truly. Like that, I'm not thinking about it in five years. I'm just done. And you and I talked about before we started this episode, money doesn't make me happy. Like, it doesn't make me happy. And there is a dollar amount. I'm going to research it and probably do a video on it.

There's a dollar amount, it's somewhere between like 95 and 120 grand, something like that. Because it used to be 75 grand. Once you make over that amount, your happiness level doesn't increase. It's like a Harvard business case study up to a certain tier, like up to like a million and a half of something of income, something like that. I don't know. So I don't know. I don't think money means happiness.

Well, if you're tired now just in your five year plan when you do have a wife and two kids, just know you'll be more tired. It'll just be different tired. Yeah, because this is stress tired. Correct. This is miserable and you can't really see in front of you. You can't really see in front of you what you're like investing in because it's just work. Whereas at least if there's a wife and kid, you're investing in your family. It's joy family. Yeah. I'm like it's like nonstop. It's like hamster wheel tired. It's interesting to hear that you say because

I don't feel like there's a lot of people who used to be five year plan people and not be five year plan people and have their perspective of like maybe what they what they prefer where they get back to because I'm the biggest anti five year plan guy ever shock why I always thought that like if I'm on a five year plan I'm going to be so narrow focus on what's on that plan that I might be ignoring the big opportunity or the breakthrough path or the you know new network and the new connection or maybe I don't feel like I need to go to this event or do this networking because it's not to do with my path whereas you know if you don't a five-year plan, you're a little maybe more open-minded because you're not so set in your

ways about conversations or different things. Yeah, that's fair. Okay, good take. Another take. I'm going to transfer. I'm going to go back. I want to talk about a little bit about Kelly forgiving deals and self-sacrificing her career for someone else. I cannot diagnose this guy at all, but I will say my read on it because I've done a lot of research. on this in a lot of research is that he has some form of narcissism like there's has to be some form of narcissism because what narcissists will do is and there's a there's a book called out of the fog that I've read several times and I would suggest anyone that feels as though they may have dealt with a narcissist in their life in a bad way should read it they will create fear obligation

in guilt that is magnified and unworthy to gain control and so like for for this guy to be like, you shouldn't be at sponsored dinners or out with other people from The Bachelor or, you know, you shouldn't be taking these brand deals. I'll wire it. He's creating some kind of fear, unnecessary obligation and or guilt that does not at all make sense with out of context with storyline and manipulation to gain control. That's all he's doing. And that's a lot what narcissists do. And then what they do is they put you in a fog where you can't think straight. You can't, nothing is making sense. And that's what I believe she's still a little bit currently in, this fog.

And once you break out of that, it's beautiful. But breaking out of that is extremely hard. You know, her turning things down, her trying to live to his expectations, her saying, I was manipulated, I was controlled. I gave up brand deals. Think about that, right? For his safety or security? No, for his control.

And so I thought that was just a really important topic that we shouldn't overlook on that episode. Yeah, I couldn't agree more. Never met that guy. Don't plan on it. Probably never will. I don't get how there are people like that that think that that's, you know, the way that you support. They can't help it, David. They can't help it.

But it's, yeah, when you have, when you have any form of, like, narcissistic behavior or tendency, it's not they can't, it's not like to control it. Yeah, it's just their reality. just their reality so yeah but like you said it you know her sharing that being open about it you know podcasts are beautiful because someone every you know this especially this recap this recap's got 10 gone down in different ways but that means that there's 10 different people that'll be impacted in different ways because they'll all resonate to something so her sharing that is just such an important thing but and she's doing the right thing when you're dealing with someone like that who is has that type of like abuse and control your only option in dealing with a narcissist like that is you

have to sever the relationship period and the store you sever it you run there's no other way you can't there's no negotiating there's no compromising there's no making sense of it there's no fair rules there's no equal game equitable solution it will never happen they will keep training you and keep trying to take control and um kudos for her and i'm like truly from like the bottom of my heart like thinking like long and hard for her and sending her all the things thoughts positive energy prayers all the shacks it's tough well you know that trading secrets is here for her her glow up her come up um and supporting her and everything that she's um that she's doing and uh we'll will have her probably back on like clockwork in two years and she'll be bubbly and smiley and you'll feel her

feel her energy through the phone and she'll have a bunch of amazing things to update us uh on at that time So we're all rooting for you, Kelly. I love it. Dude, I feel like, I feel like you warned me because I had to go to Walgreens that you made out of tape. You made David before we started this recap, was like, just so you know, I took an edible. We better get through this thing quickly.

And then I had to go to Walgreens. I feel like I could sense the edible hitting on you. It's great. It was a great episode. It was a great episode. Safe space. I told you it comes, safe space comes up once every recap. And this is how many Miller Grant, how many.

Oh, we're good. We're good. All right. Trading secrets in a safe space with David Arnaud, Kelly Flan again. Wow, what an honor was to have you on this episode. We are all rooting for you. And trust me, that light is at the end of the tunnel for you. I truly feel it.

We all love you. And thank you so much for me. this episode, Trink Secrets and David, thank you for hanging in there this long. You're welcome. You're welcome. And the last second shout out to our best friend, the one the only, Kurt the Hawk Jameson and live, get engaged. Hawks bet on the podcast before you've heard it pop in here or there. We went to college with them and we are so, so happy for Kurt the Hawk Jameson, number 23 at Geneseo, and Liv. We are so happy for you guys.

David, if you got any words before we sign out? No, congrats to them. They're the best. Yeah, they're the best. And we are so happy for them. Thank you for tuning into another episode, Trink Secrets. One you can afford to mess. Making that money, money, pay on me, making that money, money, living that dream.