Trading Secrets - Colton Underwood Tell All! From $5k/week in the NFL to Business after Bachelor Nation! The BTS of building his expansive resume, impact of Coming Out Colton, his fertility journey, and the $ecrets behind it all!

Episode Date: April 1, 2024

This week, Jason is joined by reality TV personality, activist, entrepreneur, New York Times best-selling author, former professional athlete, producer, and podcast host Colton Brown Underwood! Many may know Colton from his time spent with Bachelor Nation having been a contestant on the Bachelorette, Bachelor in Paradise, and being the leading man on season 23 of the Bachelor. In 2021, years after his time as The Bachelor, Colton shared with the world that he was gay and showcased his trials and tribulations through his own Netflix series “Coming Out Colton.” In the years since coming out publicly, he met and married his now husband Jordan and the two of them embarked on a journey of becoming parents. He is an advocate for the LGBTQIA community, a philanthropist, and has leveraged his success to give back to matters that have impacted him, his community, and loved ones though the Legacy Foundation.  Colton gives insight to what the payment looked like as a professional athlete, what injury ended his football career, what his attitude was going into The Bachelorette, how Bachelor Nation builds beasts, how he was able to work around the two suitcase rule, how an energy healer explained his constant state of flight, and what loopholes he took advantage of during filming. Colton also reveals his best advice for leveraging your authentic self, which deal he was most frustrated with, overcoming his rock bottom moment, how Coming Out Colton came to be and it being the push he needed, his ability for storytelling, and behind the scenes of his fertility journey. Since when has he been independent financially? Which contract would he never sign again? What is his goal with his production company? Colton reveals all that and so much more in another episode you can’t afford to miss!  Host: Jason Tartick Co-Host: David Arduin Guest: Colton Underwood Stay connected with the Trading Secrets Podcast!  Instagram: @tradingsecretspodcast  Youtube: Trading Secrets Facebook: Join the Group All Access: Free 30-Day Trial  Deals! TurboTax: With TurboTax Live Business, you can file your taxes with ease and maximize your tax savings! You get unlimited, year-round access to a small business tax expert and they can even completely file for you backed by a 100% Accurate, Expert Approved guarantee. For more details, head to TurboTax.com/guarantees Twillory: Twillory offers stylish, performance-driven suits, shirts, polos, and jeans designed for every aspect of the busy man’s life. Our clothes are wrinkle-resistant with plenty of stretch to keep you comfy, and yes – they’re all machine washable. For Trading Secrets listeners use code JTA18 for 18 off $139 at Twillory.com

Welcome back to another episode of trading secrets. I'm your host, Jason Tardick, and welcome to the pre-market trading segment where I tell you a little bit about what you can expect from our guests today, one personal finance tip, and one update from my personal life. This week is a perfectly timed episode as we just saw. one of the best seasons of The Bachelor, Joey G. come to a finale. Now, we have Colton Underwood,

who created scenes and ratings that the franchise had never seen before. Colton has gone through quite the journey from the highest of highs to the absolute lowest of lows. Colton has seen a lot of it. And in this conversation, you're going to hear us go all the way back

to the good old days when Colton and I were best of best of boys and some of the funniest behind this. seen stories from when we were on the show to off the show. And you're going to hear all about his business venture through those days to where he is today. So this is an episode you can't afford to miss. Okay, one little personal tip. Well, talk money to me is released this week. So exciting. We have our DC stop today on Monday, April 1st. We then have Philly, April 4th, and then Boston, April 9th. And we are throwing a book wrap party, April 19th. We have 35 free tickets

for the book wrap party. All you got to do, buy a copy, send it to me, send me a copy of receipt, and then what you got to do is just go tag one friend in my post that has the giveaway. And that's how you're entered. Those tickets will be given away soon. All you can eat, all you can drink for a few hours at a cool venue in New York City. Personal finance tip I got for you, though, April 15th is around the corner. And so March 15th, that's when business taxes were due April 15th, personal taxes. And I have partnered up with TurboTax. And something you got to know is that we all know. starting a business, it's just not easy, right? And I have faced by fair share of ups and downs since starting my business from the early days of building it, just navigating operational challenges,

even like payroll and all the moving parts of that. And then the struggles, of course, of filing your taxes. It's been a ride. But the game changer that's been for me and my business is turbo tax live business. So you get this unlimited year-round advice and answers from an expert who specialize in small business taxes. And they can even completely file for you from start to finish, which is backed by a hundred percent accurate, expert-approved guarantee. So one thing I'd recommend is hand your taxes to TurboTax Live business today. So you'll have more time to grow your business, focus on that top line. Then you could see all those guaranteed details at turbotax.com slash guarantees. Experts only available with Intuit TurboTax

Live. That is a game changer. And in my book, Talk Money to Me, you'll hear me talk about all the many personal finance game changers out there. I'll give you another quick one since we're hot right now. Think about how much you spend on an annual basis. If you don't know that number in my book, I tell you exactly how to find it and calculate it. Multiply that number times 25. That's how much you need to retire. So if you spend $100,000 on an annual basis, multiply that times $25, that's $2.5 million. If you want to live the same lifestyle you do today for up to 30 years, roughly, and obviously it changes for each person, but it's just a rough estimate of what you need to retire. 2.5 million. In my book, I give you a full table of

what is your age, what is your household income. This is exactly how much you should have saved at this point. I then give you a table if you're not there, because most of us are not there, how much you'll need to save of your gross income to get there. So that's what you can expect today. A little update from a personal finance tip. And myself, it is a busy week. You got Good Morning America Monday. We have watched what happens live with Andy Cohen on Tuesday. have our live show, of course, in Philly. I have it in D.C. And there's a few other things happen in press-wise this week in New York. But of course, this is the launch week for the book. So it is full court press. If you could please buy a copy of Talk Money to Me on Amazon, Target,

Barnes & Noble's. It is $26. It literally will make my day. But enough of me. Let's get in to what is an unbelievably entertaining, educational, and extremely insightful episode with Colton. Underwood. Also, this is such a different week for trading secrets because the first time ever, we have two episodes this week. We have our episode Monday with our main interview. And then on Thursday, corporate Natalie is coming on to interview me about the book. If we get good response for a second episode, we are going to keep doing two episodes a week. This will be our first try at it. Now, David, the Curious Canadian, is at Nationals with his hockey team. in Vegas competing for the national championship. And unfortunately, he couldn't recap the Colton episode. But what we're going to do is once he's done this week, we are going to recap not only the Colton episode, but the Natalie episode.

And that will be at the end of the Natalie episode Thursday. So we have Colton Underwood, Monday on Trading Secrets. And then Thursday, we have Natalie. The other thing I'll tell you is go into the comments. Give us five-star ratings on Apple or Spotify. And let us know what you think we should call the second episode should we decide to keep it. Of course, Monday's episode will be trading secrets. On Thursday, what I see is a wild card episode. It might be an episode on life. It might be an

episode on love. It might be an episode on money. It will be a curveball. Sometimes it will be very intense business stuff where we have more sophisticated stuff. Sometimes it will be founders. Sometimes it will be people from the money mafia that come on and just tell us their story. So think about Thursday like the wild card episode. And I'm trying to think of names for it like opening the vault or i don't know i'm not this isn't my forte so you guys tell me and if we do pick the title you come up with we will have a prize for you so go give us five stars let's know what the second episode should be called a week and that will be out this thursday welcome back to another episode of trading secrets today we are joined by reality tv personality

activist entrepreneur new york times best selling author former professional athlete producer and podcast host, Colton Brown Underwood. By the way, I had to cut that list short. There's a whole hell of a lot more, but this guy has done it all. Many of you know Colton from his time spent with Bachelor Nation, having been a contestant on The Bachelorette, Bachelor in Paradise and being the leading man on season 23 of The Bachelor. In 2021, years after his time as The Bachelor, Colton shared with the world that he was gay

and came out. He showcased his trials and tribulations through his own Netflix series coming out, Colton. And the years since coming out publicly, Colton met and married his now husband, Jordan, who I got to meet. What a beauty. And the two of them embarked on a journey of becoming parents. He is an advocate for the LGBTQIA community, a philanthropist, and his leverage his success to give back to matters that have impacted him, his community, and loved ones through the Legacy Foundation. Today we are going to catch up with Colton and discuss his career journey from the Bachelorette to today and his journey to becoming. a daddy through fertility. Colton Underwood, thank you so much for being here on Trading Secrets. I need you to follow me around and just do that lead as I walk through doors. That was great. Let's be honest. I'm ready to run through a brick wall for some introductions here.

I'll be honest. Let's just, you know what? Let's take a trip down memory lane. That's kind of what I did in 2018. Yeah, yeah. My hype man. Probably the reason they ended up signing me for Bachelor, even though you were in the running too. You were like on your call with production, probably interviewing and being like, Colton. And I'm like, you were my hype man. Oh, man. It was good stuff. And I kind of want to talk about some of that stuff because you and I have like sat down. But we, I don't think we like really sat down and talked about that time. And like, I don't know, either years or forever. And like what, just in general, what a wild flashback. Like when I met you, I think you were 25, now 32. Like, where the hell did time go? I know. I think that's what a lot of people forget is like that show,

you're like 25 when you're signing up for it you're at like a weird age typically you don't have a lot of money and also you're like don't have a great grasp on who you are and what you want to do for me even more so just coming out of like football yeah for so many years like I didn't have a social life I didn't have like the relationship maturity to even be in a position to be on a show like the bachelorette let alone becoming the bachelor but like it was a fun time like that's what you're you're supposed to do shows like that when you're 24 25 26 yeah that's the time to say yes to fun opportunities. Exactly. But what a ride. What a ride. I mean, the liability and risk, it's like, I was 29 when I did it, but the liability and risk at

doing it at 25, 26. That's when you should do it. But like, it is, it's much higher because you're still like developing into yourself. But I'll never forget when we got out of the hotel and we were in that lobby. And it was you in my limo. It was Chris, the Harlem Globetrouter. And then Wells, I see you guys. I'm like, I am a deep shit here. The small grease ball Buffalo Banker. But I want to talk to you before we get into that time, because we have some funny behind-the-scenes stories I want to talk about and just get your take on it. Is an NFL player. So in 2023, average salary, 860 grand. Percentage of athletes that claim bankruptcy within five years of the NFL is actually one of the

lowest of all pro sports. It is 15.7%. So I'm curious through your journey. I know you're a practice player. Did you also get signed? What did the financial business side look like of your journey as an NFL player? Well, to start, so I signed as an undrafted free agent with the Chargers for a signing bonus of $3,000. Oh, my God. I turned down a 49, 49ers offered me when Harbaugh was there, I think $35,000 signing bonus, which was much higher, obviously. But when I evaluated the roster with my agent, the likelihood of me making that roster was slim to none. Okay. There was an opportunity. My opportunities were better with the Chargers. So that's why I took an initial pay cut, which ended up paying off because I did stay on practice squad.

Yeah. The first season, I think I was on practice squad. I got cut, signed with Philly for literally a week when Chip Kelly was there. Oh yeah. And then returned back to the Chargers and finished out the season on practice squad. Okay. So as a practice squad player, like in a year, what can you make? Well, so I think what's important, like, when you're an athlete, you only get paid during the season. So like you don't get like this paycheck through like the entire year. It's only when you're actually in season. And it's like, for us, I think my weekly paycheck after taxes or something was like close to 5K. Okay, gotcha.

So it was like 8,800 or something was like my weekly payment. Okay. On practice squad. You make a little over 100,000. Oh my God. That's so, that's just practice squad is different than average salary, the number that I just rolled off. But I think that the perception is you're in the NFL, you're a millionaire coming into the batch. Totally.

Yeah. And did you like it from a money perspective? Did you have, like, did you have money going into the NFL? Was everything self-earned? Like, what was just your relationship with money, like going into the NFL and to into the Bachelorette? I didn't have much. I mean, my parents did really well for themselves.

And, you know, I had sort of like an allowance in high school. But the whole thing was as long as I'm playing sports year round, I never have to get a job. So I played basketball, football, and track. And then I got my, you know, my allowance. They helped me out. But also, like, they didn't pay for. college. I was a full scholarship athlete. And when I was playing football, our stipend was like $850 a month from the football program at Illinois State. So I, yeah, I had that, but I didn't

have a lot of money. I mean, it wasn't like, and once I hit college, I was independent. So I've been independent since I was 18. So like my parents, like my parents don't send me money. They didn't send me money. Like every once in all, they'd help with like nutrition or take, come and take me out. Typical parent stuff. And they visit you on campus. Yeah. But I didn't have. have like them writing me checks. Okay. Interesting. I'll never forget. We had dinner. I think it was like maybe when the first episode aired, we had dinner at your place. And I remember your dad making a comment. He's like, no one. And I mean no one has done as well or will do as well as my son who still has

never had a job in his life. And I'll never forget that comic. It was hilarious. And the dichotomy with your family with that was just. They still, I mean, they still tease me that I don't because the running joke is I asked after and fast forward a little bit after my Raiders injury I looked at my dad that we had like a long court settlement so as soon as like that Raiders settlement hit I looked at him I was like I just need a year off what's the settlement about I injured my shoulder okay there was there was some misdiagnosis going on okay and we just had like you know through arbitration just had to like go through and reach a you know an agreement and did that when you finish, finalize that agreement, did that end your career? Yeah. I was, I was advised by

the Stebman Clinic in Denver that if I got hit my shoulder in a specific point that I wouldn't be able to lift it over my head anymore. Oh, jeez. I ended up getting surgery, getting three scopes done and just like cleaning it up and then just calling it quits. I wouldn't be doing my job if I didn't ask, can you share what the settlement was or no? It was, it's all laid out in your contract. So, so like how that happens is like when you sign a contract, so I was at that point signing a third year. a third year NFL players contract. Yeah.

It is allotted for however many games that injury would have had you miss. Okay. Interesting. And then when you go through an arbitration process like that, I mean, one, it took a year. Okay. Even reach a settlement. Yeah. And then two, there was just like some discrepancies in how many games.

Oh, all sorts of things. I mean, like I took the attitude I would have, I should have taken in college. Like, I did take in college. I shouldn't have taken it in the NFL. Okay. I played while having been a broken shoulder. Oh, geez. They ended up using that against me.

Interesting. I'm like, look, he's healthy. He practiced. Yeah. He did it. And I was like, yeah, I did it when you shot me up with corner zone and put a pat, three pads on my shoulder and then told me to go play. The things you don't hear about in the NFL.

Well, I was trying to make it. It was my third year. I was spitting my tires. I was on my third team. I just switched positions to tight end. And I was like, I have a lot to prove. Yeah. I can just sit out in camp and I get hurt.

Yeah. Should have sat out in camp and got paid. That's what I should have done. I mean, that's what some of the best guys do. They just sit on the bench and get paid. All right. So give me, let me take a,

like a six or seven figure amount, the final amount that you. Six. Six figure your amount. Okay. So enough to, at this point, like when you start to cross over

into potentially this entertainment space, you get, like, give me an idea of like how much runway you have with cash. Like, are you saying to yourself, I got a million bucks. I'm going to give this a shot for 12 months.

See what happens. Like, give me the business mindset of Colton there. Yeah, It was very much, I set an amount, and I told my dad, this is the amount that I'm investing in me. And I was like, how much was it? You can't say that.

I got $50,000. Okay, cool. I said I have $50,000. If this doesn't work, and as soon as I run out of the 50, I'm coming back and I'm getting a sales job. Wow. And I actually turned down the week before I got the approval for Bachelorette, I turned down a dental implant sales position.

Wow. That was offering me like $300,000. like it was it should have been my career and your dad definitely kicked you in the head right oh he was the one who like set it up he like he helped set it up it was a friend of his I was running it and like I was like this is it and I'm like this doesn't feel right like I want to try this and I ended up you know rolling the dice with my $50,000 that is wild I'm still rolling my dice and you are rolling a few more zeros at the end of that all right let me ask you this though so before then you know you're famously known before the Bachelorette for

dating former gymnast, Allie. Don't want to get into the specifics there. But what I am curious is the business mindset. You go from practice player. You see some of the best players in the world in the locker, making all the millions of dollars. But you are an athlete. And that's what you've always been your whole life. When you start dating Allie, though, you know, you're going to SPs. You're getting a little bit of that like entertainment life. You're getting a little sip of it. Was any bit of that like attractive to you? Is that the part that may be sparked? Because I've heard you on podcast say, like, I just really liked this entertainment industry. Was that maybe part that, like, sparked it?

Or tell me just a little bit about that. Did that change anything trajectory-wise? Not so much to lights camera action, but more so, like, the profession. Tell me more. Seeing how that whole group, like Simone and how they all operated and carried themselves as, like, young athletes and professionals, that was motivating to me. Okay. It was really cool to see, like, you know, the deals that they were making, the commercials that they were part of, like, granted, they're performing, like, they're gymnasts and athletes and,

like, they're really good at what they do. Yeah. But, like, the way that they handled everything. And also, like, by the way, they were, like, going through one of the most heartbreaking stories in, like, our entire country. Right. That is ever going to be out there, you know, that still performing at that level. And still performing at that level with that pressure. Oh, my God. So it was just, it was more motivating than I was, than I would say, like, I remember, like, even the first picture of, like, the first red carpet I ever walked, you know, in that situation. And I was, I was way out of my league on multiple fronts, but way out of my league. Yeah.

Okay. I always end up where I'm not supposed to be. Like, I shouldn't have been on that carpet probably. Like, somehow I did. Yeah. I mean, there is something about, like, when you get a little glimpse into people that are outliers at that level, run their life, you see a little bit about how much they make. And you learn about, like, their discipline. there's something that's like addicting and attracting to that.

You're just like, I want that. I can be that. Or I can take little pieces of it, implement it to my life because those are what outliers do. So that happens. How does the actual show find you? So I go through the breakup. It was hard.

I was sure. Like it was like, it was weird. Like every time I reflect now and after therapy, I reflect after exiting a straight relationship. I went through this like, so I go back in. or do I just, like, try to come out? Like, that, that sort of is sort of my deal-making. I was like, I'm going to go back in and try it again. And, like, maybe the next person will make me feel straighter.

Got it's like, that was sort of my attitude there. I walk into 16th Street Mall in Denver. There's a open casting call for, because I'd watch the show. Yeah. There's an open casting call for Bachelor. Oh, yeah, real quick. All these women. But you watch the show, who is your favorite lead?

I liked Ben. Yeah, I mean, who doesn't like. But I also like Chris Sol's. I liked all. Like, there was a bunch of good ones. Yeah. Oh,

yeah, Chris is from, I know he's not. But I was thinking he's from Denver. Yeah, there's plenty. But anyway, walk into it. I walk into it.

And like, I'm like looking around. I'm like, am I supposed to be here? And like, within a second, they were like, yes,

you are. And like, had me in front, like I skipped all the lines. I was like, what is going on here? Yeah. And they had me in front of a camera and miced up in a matter of like minutes.

I'm sitting in the chair and they're like, talk to us. and I just like shot the shit with this dude for like 45 minutes and then like you know the next thing I know there's like emails coming in and like everything's moving forward yeah I'm on a plane to LA unbelievable all right so much time has passed you've had so much success since then and I think once you you've kind of found yourself and you find success in your area it's it's easier to be more honest with a question like this when you signed up for the bachelorette it all was the intention to be the lead like to take this to the top me yeah i had no no i shouldn't i wouldn't say that i

signed the bachelor contract thinking i was going to be at the top okay obviously as i enter you enter that house with all these guys your competitive juices start flowing oh yeah not only for like love but like then everything everything starts everything it becomes survivor right and that's something like we bonded over too is it's like and also why i think like pete did so well a traders like what i So Jordan said to me, and I'm going to get off on a side tangent here because I know you just had Pete on. Just had Pete out, yeah. Jordan looked at me and goes, how is Pete so good at this game? And I said, we paused it.

And I was like, so here's the thing. He's playing against game players and reality shows. The Bachelor, he was playing game strategy. If I'm at least taking my position. Yep. And I think Pete's similar to me. Yep. Pete played game strategy against production.

100%. When you have to play with and against them. With and against them. Yeah. So like. all these game players look i love ct love bananas respect their game we would run circles around them when it comes to game strategy around a production because like you have so many producers trying to produce you trying to produce the women around you to make this show that you're thinking 12 steps ahead

yeah so like the fact that like pete did really well didn't shock me at all no and i think any lead anybody this is what my comment was in the recap of that episode i said any lead or anybody from that franchise that has figured out a way to entrepreneurial do something after the show as a launch pad in this crazy world would go on any of the like you see it special forces bachelor wins right it's with the stars bachelor wins traders Peters the MVP like I'm telling you there's so much so much franchise makes beasts yeah and it's it's yeah it does I remember like I learned I have a lot of book smarts I learned a lot of my street smarts from you and I'll never forget first night you and I are sitting there and it's like 3 a.m. We have still haven't talked to Becca and I'm

panicking. I'm like, dude, I did not come this far to not get past night one. And you're like, I think we're good. You and I strategized, speaking of that, to get one of the producers, I think it was Bill at the time. And we're like, listen, talk to us. Like, what do we, and he goes, you two, you're fine. You know, remember that? He looked at you guys are fine. Look at you two. You're good. You're good. We're like, we're like, we're good. And it was from that point on, I was like, all right, Colton is going to be the guy. I, we bonded, but also I'm like, you are super smart. And I was like, I got to follow your lead. Then I started to see all this stuff. Like, I'll never forget this as long as I live. Like week two, I think, and correct you if I'm wrong. But I believe you had a bag from one of

your stylists sent to the house. I had like American Eagle shirts and cap shirts. And I'm like, I was a stylist. I styled the entire cast. I wore everything you had. Even though it was like four sizes is too big. My one-on-one date. Literally that jacket, by the way, I still have it. It was from your stylist. At one rose ceremony, I looked at him. I was like, if I go home, there's seven of my suits right now that I'm not getting back. It's unbelievable. But yeah, I had a stylist mail me at a certain week more close. How did you get the mansions? Andrew? Because they only, they only let you take two suitcases. I was like, I need more than this. So I was like, what I'm going to do is I'm going to have my stylist mail a box. Like, that's sort of, I was like thinking ahead. I was like,

I'm going to, I'll probably be on this show for a while. So I'm I'm going to need more clothes. Now, in my defense, that was like Buffalo Banker, Jason. If I went on a show now, not only would I have a stylist send it, I'd already have brand deals lined up before I went on the show, right? And you had steps ahead. So, like, tell me, like, the business side of call. Like, was that part of it?

Like, I'll get, because you also remember, you had a wine company. Your wine was sent there to. Like, talk, give me, like, the business side. Well, the wine was all for my nonprofit, which, by the way, like, the nonprofit that I set up, you know, people had opinions on that too. I was like, I set that up in Illinois as like a regional charity to support the Children's Hospital was never designed or built to have the infrastructure for like a national foundation. So we had a lot of catching up to do right away.

Yeah. But yeah. And I think like that was great. But I didn't really set up brand deals. I did know that I wanted a stylist. One because like once you see yourself on a red carpet and you're like, that's not it. You're like, I need to get help. Yeah.

Yeah. Okay. So I knew that I needed to get help with some looks. Yeah. Well, you nailed the looks. You nailed the looks. You nailed the game. You nailed the show and I remember us just be, I kind of would be like, dude, I haven't gotten

one of these group date roses and you came back from, I think it was like week six or seven. You and I are sitting in and you just got, you're taking it off in the bathroom. You're like, this isn't good, man. I'm like, well, I'm like, what? You go, I got another group date rose. I was like, yeah, what's the problem, but I haven't got one? And I remember you saying, like, I don't know, man. Like, I don't know if I don't, I don't think I could do this like with her down.

but like, I don't think this is my girl. Like, I know, you were confused in the bathroom. You and I lights camera off, just saying like, I don't know what the hell to do because I have the whole Tia card too. But, oh, because I know, you had the Tia card going into it. But you all, but they addressed that week too. You and I sat down, remember that? But by week six, you at least in this moment thought there was a chance you might end up

with Becca and you're like, shit, I don't, I don't know if I'm ready for this. And I always ask myself, was that more like Colton gameplay? Like, I want to make it to the end and be the Batchel? Or was that more like, were you dealing with some of the things that you've dealt with about being straight, being gay? You didn't know if like you were really actually into? Like, what side of that was? That's a good question.

I don't, I really don't know. Maybe I think deep down my subconscious always protected me. Yeah. So some way somehow, like it always sort of steered me. back to my true and authentic self, however that looked, whether it was disastrous and like not healthy or good for me or like just like little simple course corrections, right? Yeah. And I definitely think there's moments where like that was popping up.

I'm like, but I wanted like, I wanted to be straight so bad. Yeah. Like I wanted to end like, look, I for on that, I wanted to end up with her. Yeah. So then like maybe this is going to force my hand to get engaged. And once once I'm engaged, then maybe. I'll feel like this is, this is it. This is it. Okay. So it's this constant battle. The next thing will give me the clarity. Correct. Okay. Okay. So it's a really toxic approach. Yeah. Well,

but when it's like your survival mechanism. Yeah. And you're as deep in the closet as I already was just between everything that I had in my life. Like, yeah, there was no turning back. You had mentioned that, you know, what Simone and Ali had been dealing with outside of the professional success. I don't know that you would even want to compare the two. But clearly you, you, you were dealing with a lot mentally, but it's interesting, you were still having so much success in everything you did, even the batch, all the things you did. Is there something there about the way you protected and safeguarded, like you put the wall up, almost all your focus was only on work? Because it feels from the outside. You had so much success while you were dealing,

especially in this 2018, 19 timeframe, while you were dealing with so much internal disarray. Yeah. I mean, that's, that's definitely accurate. I think, think that I definitely compartmentalized a lot of my life. The one thing that always was a through was my work and how I approach things. And like I've said this a couple of times. So like I was never the most athletic, never the most talented. But I always worked the hardest. Yeah. And like, even if I'm not the best or most talented in a room, I'll still try to, I'll still find a way to get the job because like I'll work harder than the people around me. Yeah. That was sort of just my attitude and how I took it. But I actually went, I'm not a woo-woo guy. Yeah. Okay. I went to an

energy healer. Okay. Like recently? Recently. Okay. And here's how, what happened. I sort of told him some stuff that was going on and he looked at me and goes, you have daddy issues. Not in the way that like it gets thrown around. Yeah. Daddy issues. Yeah. He goes, you grew up in the Catholic church. Say the Lord's prayer. And I saw our father. And he goes, stop. Father. I was like, okay. And he goes, you have learned your entire life that Father is Almighty. And Father does not just represent your dad. It represents your coaches, the producers, all these people.

So anytime you face conflict, you know not to fight against Father. So your body has always been in a constant state of when it enters fight or flight to fly. So you're always on to the next thing. You never confront your father. So you never confront authority. You never go against who that is. So you're in a constant. it makes sense that like once I was done with the Bachelor franchise, I just turned my back on

it, burned it down, like we're trying to get out of it and just flew on to the next thing. Yeah. That's sort of been the story of my life with like NFL with that. Like I'm just on to the next and I'm always in a state of flight. Interesting. I just thought it was such a great perspective. Like whether it was accurate or not, like I don't know, it helped me. Yeah.

It felt cool to do. Yeah. And I think there was something there. Well, I think that even ties into the question I asked, which is like when faced with some of those predicaments, you just kept flying. And your flying was, you know, get your rows, do your thing, like, be the best. You're the best on the show. I'm always on to the next one. On to the next one. Yeah. One of the things though, okay, I'm going to dig even a little deeper there because one of the things that I was like, I would always take from you because I learned it from you was you were so

good with production and the higher ups. You were like the best. You were the most beloved and loved, but you're also getting like finding different things out. Do you remember when we were, I'll never forget. We were going to the treadmills to work out. Oh, yeah. And then you figured out how it was connected to the internet and you were able to look up like things that we needed to know. I took that. And in hometowns, I did, I did that like four times.

Like I was like getting emails from people like run. I mean, the old ellipticals and treadmills had the Twitter you can log in. And I was like messaging my family from my Twitter. You were like hitting your family up. I'm like, dude, did you see anything? You're like, I don't know. I ended up getting caught too.

Yeah. I remember you guys. They flagged it to production. Yeah. But you know what? The rest is history. I got a question for you that relates to con and my book talk mind to me. I talk about contracts all the time.

Yeah. I could be right. I could be wrong. You could say pass here if you don't want to deal with this. Right. But my understanding was, and I think it's one of the smartest moves I've ever heard anyone make in any contract. My understanding is that in the contract, there's some type of liability risk of

which you could be sued up to. And you got an insurance liability, insurance protection. So if you're sued up to that amount, you had insurance, so you recovered. True, false pass. True. Okay. I have multiple policies.

You're genius. In ways to protect myself. We're through an umbrella, through life, through so many different things. Do you think that strategy connects to exactly what you just said about like the fatherhood? Like there, like protection against the fatherhood. So like you were always in defense of the people at the top that had the control. I think there was a mix of that. And I also think there's a mix of like there was a legitimate.

most the time if production ever sues talent, they know that they're going to win. Yeah. Oh, yeah. My guess is the reason why they never, like, really, really pursued me is because I had a good stable of lawyers ready to go. Yeah. And like, they just knew that, like, I was a least savvy enough to figure it out. Yeah.

So I had loopholes. I mean, that was like, look, like I said, I was never always the most talented. I, there, I shouldn't have been in many situations that I've been in. But I always put myself in the best position possible once I was there to, like, succeed or have, you know, do a good job. Yeah. And there's another, like, I've learned so many business lessons for you that I continue to carry forward. One of the biggest ones was, and we've talked about it, and I think you've talked about it. I've heard you talk about it on podcast, too, is when we were interviewed for The Bachelor. Yeah. So me, you and Blake are interviewed. And I remember, like, I remember exactly what I did. I went in there. I'm going to tell them everything they want to hear.

I'm going to be the boring vanilla guy. I'm here for love. And I'll never forget when you told me you told them, listen, Blake and Jason, I'd want to grab a beer with them too. You want a good show. I'm your guy. There is so much that people back home can listen and learn from that. Because you, when you're interviewing for a job,

when you are, if someone's selling medical devices, like a job you almost took, insurance. You have to know the people that you're talking to. you have to know how to create value for them and stop trying to be something you think they want to be, but be the best version of yourself at that time for the value they need to hear. All those people there, they didn't give a shit if I wanted to be married and happy with kids. They need a good TV show. And like, I wanted to see.

They needed a $7 million profit. They needed to see what they wanted. Is that like, was that part of the thing they said? No, I mean, I don't know with the exact numbers where I knew it did really, my season did really well for them, profitability wise, but look, you're walking into Flyce's door to his office. Yeah. By the way, I don't know if you paid attention when you walked through it or if you were just nervous and didn't it.

He had that door custom made flew in. Wait, really? You never noticed his door? Dude, see, this is why I want to hang out with you all the time. You know everything. You can't walk, like, this man's, like, office and just, like, how he presents himself. I mean, you guys get a glimpse of him on Twitter. I walked into that meeting and, like, kicked my shoes off and threw my feet on his desk.

I'm like, let's go. Wait, that's what he did to me. When I walked in, he kicked his sandal. He wore his sandals. Well, that's the problem. You let him do it. You didn't do it. See, dude, I'm still learning from you all these years later.

It wasn't exactly like that. Yeah, the glasses. You can't see through it. And he didn't look at me once. I think there was, there was a part of me that thought, like, because he was a big Chargers fan too. So, like, immediately I'm like, yo, did you call Telesco, the GM? And I was like, what do he said?

Like, is he excited for me? Yeah. Like, something like, like, we were shooting the shit off that. Alon and Bennett were there. It just was like, and it was very much like this on the couch, chilling, just being like, let's do this. Yeah. It wasn't, it didn't feel like a business meeting. It didn't feel like an interview. Yeah. It was just sort of like a fun, like, I'm going to go, like, walk into this dude's office and be like, let's go. Yeah, I was scared, shitless, nervous. And I think they're probably its most boring guy ever. All right, but I want to say,

I want to bring this back to the listening base. Yeah, yeah. You're very skilled at that, obviously you're observant and even seeing the door. You, you kind of mirror his behavior. for people back home that don't have that confidence or don't even know how to prepare for stuff like that. What is some advice you'd give them? Whether it's an interview, it's a sales pitch, maybe if it's even a date, like some of those things to be like,

no, I am going to be here and I'm going to do my best so they see the best version of me. Well, there's this saying, and it goes like fake it until you make it. I don't like that exactly because like it catches up to you. I mean, like, look,

it caught up with me at 1.2 because like I was trying to be somebody, I wasn't. Sure. But always trying your hardest and like preparing as much as you can and just also having like the self-awareness to know what your weaknesses are. Yeah. Like, you know, there, I didn't have, you know, the smoothness that maybe you did or like the authenticity that sort of Blake had. And you guys, I was never trying to be Jason or Blake when I entered that room. Yeah. I was just like, this is what I'm good at. This is like who I am. So I leaned into that. So I think it's like not so much of like fake it till you make it but it's like really just like what makes you

good and hyper focus on that and bring that to the table because like that's what got you into this position in the first place yeah i love like so finding what differentiates you and just lay into that yeah like and obviously a lot i have to find a picture of this door to show you i got to see the door i remember like yesterday i think it was like i think it was like i think they even did an article on it i want to say the door i remember like i could paint you the entire Because I think when you have these like, I don't want to say trigger moments, but these like really important moments of your life that are just so outlined, you always remember. I remember the door, but I would never remember it special. That office I could paint you a picture. I want to say, I don't want to misspeak. I'm almost 90% sure it was the door. It might have been the desk. There was one, all I know is like there was something so crazy that I asked one of the producers like, what is the deal with this? And like he had it flown in. Something like to that extent. I was like, okay, like this. This. man means business. So like, let's do it. There's things to take away from that. That is good stuff. The other thing, too, I got to bring up because you and I talked about in Savannah Chrysley's

podcast, you and I were buddies after the show, Becca Tilley was doing a non-for-profit. I don't know. You remember this. She was doing like a non-for-profit. It was like a can. She was like fundraising for like getting cans and giving them back to like one of the food shelters. And you're like, we got to go. I think you said at the time, you had a crush on Becca. I was like, all right, let's go. We stayed at my brother's place. Now, you know, my brother's gay and married. You left that weekend. And he was like, you know, he's gay, right? And I was like, wait, you know, I'm about Colton? And my brother's like, yeah. And I was like, no, he's not. And he's like, yeah, he is. And I'm like, no, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just like, I'm just like, did you think you, like, did you know you were gay at that point? Were you certain? Were you

still fighting it? Like, and then it's like, gator. I'm like, how did he know that? Oh, gay men terrified me when I was in the closet. Why? Because they could just like see right to it. Yeah. I mean, yes, that and I think there was like, obviously there would be emotions I would come up

within me when I saw somebody living an outlife. Yeah. That I'd be like, oh, I can never have that. Whatever, however those emotions presented himself. Yeah. I, look, I always knew. But I also, like, thought that there was a pathway for me to just become straight. Like, I bought that version of, like, you know, all the way from, like, print, trying to pray and end it with, like, I don't want to be gay.

Like, there's so many things that I leaned into. Yeah. But yeah, gay men scared me. I would say I knew. And it's sort of L.O.L. now with Becca coming out and finding her love. Oh, yeah. I'm like, oh, we could have had, like, an arrangement in our straight life. That's interesting.

All right. And, yeah, Steve, you were right. You nailed it. All right. So you go on The Bachelor. We know that spoiler. I'll still never forget me, you, Blake, we're all on one group text. They tell us Labor Day.

We're going to call one of you guys tomorrow, and you will be the guy. They call you, you're the guy. You have a great season. Ratings off the charts. Let's fast forward through Bachelor stuff, but let's talk about a little business after the Bachelor. You were very intelligent with how you navigate your business. You know, you were one of the only bachelors that were able to turn a book at the speed

you did after your season and become a New York Times bestseller. selling probably if I had to guess the most units of books ever been sold from a former bachelor. And I think even with like your branding strategy and brand deals, monetization, you did it differently. But I've never got a glimpse into that. So whatever you're comfortable is sharing,

like how much did you make compared to the NFL? What was part of your strategy? Tell me about the business side of Colton when the show's over and you have all that momentum. Yeah. I mean, look, I think I shared you with some numbers. Like I made 100x plus what I made in the NFL.

like off of that. You're making millions off when you finished a show. Yeah, but I also like the reason why I think there was a lot of tension between me and The Bachelor was never, there was some on camera. They gave me like, look, I hate even saying it gave me the edit because like you're the one who's in front of camera. Yeah. You can, it's really hard to edit somebody to look really, really bad when they did really like when they were and like who they were and how they handled things. Yeah. I never had like beef with that. There was some things behind. the scenes that happened and then also just like contractually i would never sign that bachelor contract again i mean you you got the same once you knew too like there's a tail on it and like they get to

approve some of your deals like i bet i left north of four or five million on the table because of my contract the one that really ticked me off was i was in talks with halo top oh yeah yeah yeah Nick did that. You see where I'm going with this. I see. I was in talks with them to do social media campaign and possibly like a commercial with it. And my agent was negotiating it. We were in talks and like we submitted it to ABC for approval.

Okay. All of a sudden it goes cold on my agent's end and we followed up and they're like, hey, we're actually going to go in a different direction. Like so weird. Like they had like the deliverables. They had the contract. They had the price. They had all this game plan.

And then all of a sudden they're like going in a different direction. I get to my finale of my season. Like, hey, like, we want, like, the shower scenes were a big hit for everybody. It's like, hey, we want to, like, show out, like, film a mock shower. Yeah, we have Ken the Barbie doll. We're made to have to have a show. I'm in the green room at, like, the live stage, and I'm hopping in this shower. I'm, like, faking my shower, and they're like, hey, hold this.

I'm like, they're like, what? And he handed me a halo top. And immediately I got hot. And I was like, this is where the deal went. And they product integrated into my finale with Halo Top. and then they booked Nick to do the commercial. So the ABC, like, obviously, look, you're smart.

That's in the contract. I signed it. I shouldn't be, I'm not mad at, like them. You feel like you got out thought. Like, they,

oh yeah, they probably, they made the money that I was supposed to make, but then they product integrated it and then used my likeness because they could because they had the green light in my contract. And honestly, at this point, like,

well, it ticks you off from a business leadership. Oh, from a business. I'm like, touche. Touche. All right,

but you move on. You're making a ton of money. Things are going well. I don't want to get into the specifics of everything, but you have your rock bottom moment. You've talked about it. You've taken accountability for it. And all that happens.

How does that, and you've talked about the mental aspect of that as well. I also have to imagine a lot of this stuff with NIL is connected to like credibility, likeness and like what's happening. How bad does a setback of that nature? impact your business and like just even the monetization and like income flow. I would imagine that has a huge impact. Of course, mentally first, but also from a business perspective too.

I wasn't at that point, I was doing well enough. Yeah. To be mainly just concerned for my life. Okay. Just speaking transfer. So much, it's just so much deeper. Once you have that type of experience that I had, like that was really, really bad. Yeah.

And then it wasn't just, there was one night in particular that was like the worst. Yeah. But it was going on a few weeks of just like really, really abusive medication that I was like abusing my medication to a point where it's like, it was not healthy. And like I shouldn't have been. I shouldn't, I wasn't in my right mind to do anything. So once you have the perspective of like your life, it just like I truly wasn't worried about money. And also like at that point, I'd left L.A. I went and moved back in with my dad.

I gave him my medications. I was seeing a psychologist and a therapist two times a week. Like I was like fighting for my life of like just basically being like I have to figure this out. Even when I was doing that, I didn't even come out. Like when I asked for help, even from that psychologist and that therapist, I didn't get like, I didn't tell them what was going on. Wow.

So people back home, if they're hitting rock bottom or they've hit rock bottom or they've hit rock bottom in a standpoint that people still label or characterize for something that happened. And they need to work on growing and changing so they're not that person, whether it's professionally, financially, or personally. Being there and having done it yourself and grown from it and have become the man you are today, what advice would you have for those people? even if you feel like you don't have a support system lean on like that one person that you think might be there for you just like having that faith that you have somebody to support even though like I know even in my darkest times I was like I don't have any support system in this I can never like I can never do this like I don't have that team I don't have that support

you do you just don't understand it and there's like this mental block so like as soon as I sort of worked up the courage I think, I mean, I told my publicist first because he was dealing with like photos and stuff. And then and then I dealt with my professional team. I told them. And then I came out to my family. Yeah.

And it just was like, really, it was like you get the confidence after you tell like the first couple people. Yeah. But it was a slow crawl back out. I'll say that. Yeah. And like once I got out, I got kicked again. I might, you know, so it's like, it was tough. And the thing I'm hearing and tell me if I'm hearing this right, but it's like, in that darkest, deepest, worst place of your life, like, just find the smallest step

forward and like get off that momentum and then another step will come. But there is that step forward. There's someone you can step on to get that step. Just find it. That's what I'm here. It's kind of. Yeah, you're not going to step into the light immediately. Yeah.

You're going to get closer to the light. Yeah. And that's like your goal every day should just to be to like, make that little, that light at the end of the tunnel a little bit bigger. Yeah. A little bit bigger. And then as soon as like you get to the point where you're finally feeling, you know, better, hopefully you're out and you're in that light.

Okay. That's, and speaking of light, you got to that light. And then you were able to actually create a show through Netflix coming out Colton, which is very supportive of the LGBTQIA community. And a question I have for you there is with that, you had to, you had to really put some of your darkest times on blast after you're just coming out of it, come out of it and put it into a show. What was like the personal and the business balance and the decision of doing that? Well, I just had to work through how I was going to own it. Like at

this point, I ran from it for 28 years, 28, 29 years of my life. Yeah. And I had on multiple occasions said, I'm not gay and or alluded to my, I mean, even in my book, I, like, had a sentence in there saying, like, I am not gay. Like, I addressed my sexuality in my book, and I, you know, probably shouldn't have. And it just, like, the, the backstory there, though, was like, that production company was already in talks with me for another project in which I took, when I took my mental health break and, like, moved back in and my crisis. And I sort of backed out of but it was led by two gay men who sort of knew enough to know what was going on similar to your brother okay they were like okay we have an idea but then like i dropped out and like was

like i can't do this project anymore and then they re-approached me and we're like let's you know next time you're in l.a let's grab coffee so we grab coffee and they're they basically alluded to it and i came out to them i said this is what i've been going through like i don't know what to do right now I don't know what's next. I don't know, like, what I have to do. And they're like, we'll get right back to you. And then, like, and they were like, Netflix wants to talk to you. So like, once I talk to Netflix, everything was like in like immediately in, you know, going.

Yeah. But there was a lot that we had to sort of sort through just because I had so much distressed of like reality TV. Oh, of course. Yeah. So, but personally, I want to hear for the personal reason you do it. Yeah. Because you're like, I needed to, I had a story. Let's tell the story.

do it in a fashion which it can make as much impact. Is that the personal side of doing? No, the personal side was because it held me accountable to have those conversations. Interesting. So do I wouldn't know it forced you to do it. Yeah, because I know like in this scene I'm coming out to my dad. In this scene, I'm coming out to my mom. It, it forced my hand. Wow. Actually come out on camera. Interesting. Because I'm like, I had a crew. I had a schedule. It was like, call it whatever you want. People's coming out. Experiences are different. Yeah. I knew like it helped. in my coming out experience to know that like in a certain scene I was coming out to my dad and I had to have this conversation. Right. And it's like things like that when you step into it, it accelerates getting to your place of happiness where you're at now.

We're going to get to that in just a minute. Talk to me about the business side of the show. Like when you do a Netflix show, can you own rights to it? Is it just a talent fee? Like how does how does business of doing a show that's your own on Netflix work? Well, I told you earlier I would never sign the same contract that I signed as a bachelor. And I took that into that. And I didn't sign the same contract. I was an executive producer on the show. And that was one of the main things at the very beginning before we've been engaged was this like, this is my life, my story. Like, I've been through a lot. Like, let's do this together.

And I will say to their credit, it was one of the best experiences in my professional career. Just from like the process or like the whole Netflix team. Just everything. Money, no. Okay. I think like. So it's not a money place. Something I could like comfortably say.

is you take a haircut on the finances when you go to Netflix. Okay. Okay. And like I understood that. Okay. Like their reach is greater than any other streaming service that like it's, they don't have to offer you the top dollars. Like, and once again, you're not, people don't get excited about the $100,000 that comes with The Bachelor.

They get excited about like after. Like obviously they have a chance to find love and then also they have all these fun, crazy, cool experiences. We talked about you, I'm pretty sure you and I both. both talked about doing reverse negotiating. At least I did. I was like, I was, I didn't do it, but I was really considering don't, because the offers of a hundred grand. We have talked about that a lot. And I said, I was going to say, don't pay me anything because the value of that

screen time and everything's millions. Like, who cares about the hundred grand? Right. Right. So your thought process was Netflix. Take a haircut on what payment comes in. I'm going to make an impact. I'm going to be forced to come out to the people I love. And on top of it, it's going to be, you know, I'm an executive producer. Yeah. I mean, once, once again, the content of that show, it was like me coming. I wasn't really thinking about the money once like it. I had the understanding of I had to get out of like this whole personally that I was in of like owning my shit for the first time and also like reintroducing myself in public and be like this is who I am. This is why I did what I did. This is what my process was and like this is

this is me. Like I and like in a very like in a way that like I was still figuring it out as we filming. Wow. So interesting. Up into that point you have probably the most wild track and wild resume of anybody that touches reality TV from your stories NFL player through the Bachelor franchise to your coming out Colton on Netflix. And you have built a celebrity status and a brand that is unlike anybody that's ever come in the 20 years from the franchise. So I'm going to get into Jordan and your fortility story now, and I'm excited about that. But I want to make sure I address this, business-wise. Where do you go?

Like, you got your own Netflix show. You were one of the best batchers of all time. Ratings were off the charts. You're making your millions at this point. You had a huge, huge growing pain you learned from overcame, took ownership, and our new person. Where is it, do you think, like, more reality TV? Do you go to acting? Do you get into ownership?

What's like the business process from this point out? The thing that I just, I was just talking to somebody and at the end of the day, if I like use words to describe me, it would be like storyteller. And the first story that I had to tell was my own. So once that's now out of the way, I have an opportunity now to like tell other stories. And that's sort of what I'm doing with my production company is working with other humans out there. and just doing different unscripted shows. I have a scripted project.

I have a documentary that I've been, you know, producing and developing. Wow. So there's a handful of things that I have and I'm building on the back end. Just because like, you know, my Netflix show wasn't the most well received right when it first got announced. There was obviously some blips and people had opinions and everything. I remember, you know,

people were calling for me to like donate my talent fee. And I was like, I don't even know if I'm in like the top. hundred paid off of this project and you're asking me to make this contribution like yeah you know i think that it's just you know there there's so much more to be done on the back end yeah excites me just from a creative standpoint and also just longevity in this career so i can't i'm not going to go back on like i can't ever at this point go back on like a reality type format like I just, I just, it wouldn't feel right. Like even like a competition show.

Oh, I would do competition shows. Okay, so you would do that. Okay, gotcha. I'll always be a competitor. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So like that. And I always don't like to speak, I don't like to speak in definitive either because like, you should like people like to hold you to whatever you say.

So it's like if I say, I'll never do that. It's like something's going to come up. Well, people shouldn't hold definitive after it learns it through therapy. You shouldn't hold people to absolutes because that's suggesting. People change. People change. Yeah. So anyway, I would definitely do competition shows.

So I just, I'm having. like fun and I'm enjoying building shows right now and I'm enjoying telling other people's stories. I'm enjoying the experience that I have and like helping other people through it. Yeah. Like I made a lot of mistakes in my entertainment career so far and I've only been in it for a few years. Yeah. But like I'm, you know, I'm going to try to put my best foot forward. Yeah. Okay. Well, so now I got, I'm going to play devil's advocate. I'm going to defend the producers a little bit. So now the idea is you were the main character. Right. He worked with producers. And now you're going to go into production.

it. How does that make you feel? Like, do you have any bit of like, like, do you find any bit of like, okay, wait, there's a little hypocrisy. I'm doggot on these producers, but now I'm a producer or are you taking a different angle? Like, tell me about that. Yeah. So one thing we're doing different is all of our unscripted content that we make, the talent gets free therapy for a year after the show. I think that just stems from my own personal stuff. I needed help. I didn't get it. I didn't have access to it. I didn't, you know, I was sort of shamed when it came to it in a way. Yeah. Anytime I wanted to talk to the therapist, like, why don't you go sit in for a confessional? I'm like, yeah. No, no, no. I'm not the same thing. I need a professional. So that's one change that I'm making that I think should be standard in most production agreements now. Because like what you're blowing these people's lives up in many ways. Yeah. You're making them rich. You're making them famous. But then also you're giving them anxiety, depressed, like you're setting them up for bad habits if you don't protect them.

Yeah. That's one thing we're doing. And then two, I, I'm just really working right now. My goal and like if I had like a, like, a summary of like what as best friend productions is, it is. bridging our country. The content that we put out, I'm trying to unify and be positive and uplifting, but also introducing new characters to people in towns that might not have that exposure. Wow. So there's a lot of towns out there and a lot of different states that are cultural deserts. Oh yeah. So like they don't see a black person. They don't see a queer person.

They don't know what it means to be transgender or gay or they don't have that representation. Right. Right. But when they turn on a show, they have an opportunity. And so for me, it's like, how do we do this in a way that feels like they can understand that character and what they're going through? Yeah. It's really cool. You're using experiences to now be behind the camera, produce things that are impactful to visibility people need to see. Yeah. And tying it back to the podcast, trading secrets, I'm making an assumption, but I have to assume when you're on the production side and you all, own the shows, the upside's got to be massive, right? Yeah, way more than the talent field. That's what I'm saying. So there's also, so you're doing all these things that like are great and there's change that has to happen. But it also is a hell of a business plan too. Well, hell of a business plan. And you don't have to have the stress that comes with being on on TV anymore.

Like I think people are like, oh, how fun was that? I'm like, yeah, the anxiety that I had every Monday night when I turned that show on, not knowing what, like, what I said or what the mics picked up or what was caught, they don't give you screen. Like, they give you, as the lead, they give you a couple screeners here and there. Yeah. And, but, and the feedback. Like, that, that was one thing, like, just like the comments, the DMs, like, you're not prepared for like a title wave of either good or bad to just come at your plate. And it totally. Yeah. Yeah. So, yeah, that it definitely and the long just like the longevity like people you know i people who still are like you're 15 minutes of fame it's like i've been doing this for a few years now like it's not and i like

i'm not seeking that like i do want to have long i love the entertainment business yeah it is so much it's like it's like it's like nothing moves like you talk about selling like you're like you almost did devices like that there's a there's a high of selling the device going into the search sales they're selling yourself yeah there is no high like the entertainment right and the speed at which it goes. Right. But the speed at which it goes away. Like it's this, it's just a, if you're a game player, it's a wild game. Right. See, that's, that's, that's some of my problem with some of the people from reality in our, even our franchise is they get that. So what they do is they start their podcast. They go on their red carpets and they run their mouth. Yeah.

Saying things that they actually don't really believe. Yeah. And or as soon as they get off that red carpet are going to text that person and be like, so sorry, I did this. And it's like, they're, they're playing that game. Yeah. I'm just like, why are you doing? Like, where are you doing? You're like, I am the game. You're like, I have to deal with this. Yeah, I have to do this. And I will take ownership. I fell, I fell for that

once with Colton. There was a few. We had a talk. I think it was just once or twice. No, no, not you. No, but I'm just saying a few people. Yeah. I did once. I said something I shouldn't have said in an interview when I was asked. It was about our relationship. I was yeah, I was triggered because we weren't friends anymore. And Colton and I

had to have a heart to heart. So I don't, I usually don't typically do that. Yeah, no, no, that was, that's not, while we're on this, while we're on this, there's, you know, that was like the one thing as I was working through this is the dog pile mentality is a very real thing. I think it's easy for people just to like, when they see somebody down, it's easy to just jump on the dog pile and, like, kick them while they're down and or just, it's easy click bait. It's easy. Whatever you want to call it. But like, there, there was a lot that, like, there is always, and I have such an appreciation now for people who are going through a hard time. because like I'm sure there's shit in the media right now with you and oh yeah yeah like that is not

true yeah oh yeah you're like do I fight this do I own it do I own part of it do I not fight like you have to make so many decisions that's why like even like the comments like I my I have to be calculated in my life yeah if I'm not I'm going to be hurt yeah so like you have to calculate a certain degree to prepare yourself to protect yourself too yeah like I like the reason why I I'm calculated is because I have to protect my mind. I have to protect my body. I have to protect who I am. So like that's why I'll always go to bat and say like, fair statement.

Yeah. But there's, it's not for the reasons that like maybe most of the public thought. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I also think ever since I said that comment, I always took it back because I think calculated has such a negative connotation. And I've been called calculated often.

But sometimes like you said, calculated is literally just the process of like, I don't trying to defend and like create a safe place for yourself right like sometimes it's just creating safety right it's not the intent to hurt others or do anything else it's just literally creating safety yeah and so there's something there and a game plan and a game plan yeah i also know it's real quick i'll say this and then i want to quickly get to your fertility because i know your time is limited here but the idea i think a lot of people come off the show and then or any show and they get this quick hit of fame and they lose sight of who they are and where they were six months ago and they think they're the next George Clooney and Articaprio, and then they don't want to, like, put in the work

and do the things you have to do. And then they create this ego. And then six months later, it's all gone and nothing's there. Like, that's a real common thing, too. So this space is a wild space. We talk about it often on this podcast, but it's always interesting to hear from you, Colt. But Colt, you have a new journey in your life on top of now being an owner of a production company. I can't wait to see some of your work. But I had read that you have worked with a nine-person medical team, lawyers, an egg donor, and a surrogate to go through the whole process of fertility to now become full circle, the father, the figure that you have worked so hard to understand, get to know, and now fill into that role and maybe do things differently

for your son or daughter. Talk to me a little bit about this process. When I was reading nine-person medical team, lawyers, egg donor, and surrogate, this, my brain, I'm just like, time and money. I mean, more now. Every week, there's a new extension or person added into it. So go through the, so I assume step one, get your sperm tested to see if the sperm is healthy. Is that correct? Yeah, everybody.

And like, I'm a big advocate for this. Right now, when the word IVF comes up, you think of it as last resort. Yeah. Oh, shit. Oh, they had to do IVF. Yeah, they're going through IV. How I challenge people is IVF should be viewed as preventative medicine. Listen, testing your sperm, you should do at 20.

You should freeze your sperm at 20. You don't know what's going to happen. Like, our military freezes their sperm. Interesting. I didn't know that. Like, there's a lot of people who are at risk and or doing certain jobs that have to freeze their sperm. Oh, my God. I want to go freeze my sperm test recently.

Numbers were great. I was thrilled about, but I should freeze my sperm. Freeze your sperm. I would advocate all of the men out there that want to be fathers. Okay. Get your sperm tested. If the numbers are good. and or great, freeze it.

You can always, like, come back. Like, you don't know what's going to happen in your life. Like, and I mean this all the way down to, like, you know, what just happened in Alabama with the IVF ruling. Yeah. What people don't realize is anybody who battles cancer, childhood cancer, they have to have their eggs taken out and frozen. They have to, like, going through radiation and chemo sterilizes you.

So, like, there are other health factors that go into it. My case and what, like, why I struggled with my sperm, was through testosterone and other lifestyle activities that I was partaking in. Yeah. But I'm a huge, huge, huge advocate for freezing your sperm. There's an at-home, not to like plug any way, there's an at-home sperm testing kit called legacy sperm. That's great.

Okay. So easy. Okay. Like in, out, boom, done. How much does it cost to freeze your sperm? A couple hundred bucks. Okay, okay. But like, it's affordable to do.

Once again, pretty affordable. Okay. You can't put a price tag on your kids. You can't. Yeah. That's just like, find a way to make it work. life. That's what I tell it. It's like we have to find a way to make it work. Okay. So you go through the process. You suggest everyone gets their sperm frozen. You'll find out your sperm from a testosterone

other stuff has some issues. What are some things? Like how long is the process to get your sperm back to where it should be? Six months. Six months. And then I'm assure a whole medical. Yeah. So when I'm I got my results, Jordan got his and it was 55 million, something like that, of like just a ton of sperm. Yeah. And I get mine in like four. Three of them are dead. You're like What the hell? I looked at that I was like, excuse me? Yeah. And he, like, moved on to the next topic.

And I was like, oh, we got it back up here. And we retested at three months after I, so I stopped to Sasha. I stopped a handful of things. I talk about it all in like one of the episodes on Daddyhood that's out right now. Okay. Go listen to that. Everything that I like did to change that. Tested at the three month mark, trending in the right direction.

Doctor's like, great. Let's get it better. Okay. Three months later, six months now. I got it to where they wanted to freeze it. Okay. So six months got to where you wanted to. You're spending about a thousand bucks or so. Next process is you have to get an egg, right? Yeah. But so you're doing them all simultaneously because right now where there's a surrogate shortage and like there's a wait list, about a six month wait list for surrogates. Six month wait list. Yeah. Interesting. So you do everything at once. Yeah. We hired a concierge service to help connect us to everybody. Okay. I got to ask the dollars and cents. Dollars cents and time for the whole package. What does this cost?

for just that donor conciergeers or like all in for fertility. Like if you Google the average price for a surrogate, it's insane. Yeah. It's like a six figure dollar amount. Are we talking about like what stage? Just everything that we've done so far? Yeah, like because I'm so lost at the stages and you're telling me you guys did it all at once. Like I know you obviously have to have an egg.

There has to be fertilization. It then has to be you have to have a surrogate. Like there's all these stages. Like what are the stages and what are the dollars like that you've had to spend on these stages? our baby will be equivalent to a vacation house or two at the end of the day. Wow. So, yeah, it was, it was a lot. And we, you have to, you have to start somewhere.

Starting with a fertility lawyer is what I would like to say. So start with your fertility lawyer right after. Get the lay of the land. Grab an agency. So you have to go through an egg donor. Once you have your egg donor selected, you're, you're still going through, at least we where we were still going through our surrogate and who that was going to be in what agency we were going through there.

And like what people don't realize is like our doctor that we're using services three people. We are one of his patients. But then the egg donor is his patient and the surrogate is his patient. And we are. So he has three patients right off of the bat. Wow. And which for the most part we're responsible for all those bills.

Oh my God. So none of our insurance covers it. All out of pocket. a vacation home or two is a seven-figured dollar amount close to yeah i mean look i'm talking about like down payment i'm not i'm not buying my vacation homes and cashier jason we're mortgaging them but uh eight percentage eight percentage i mean yeah the interest rates a little high now i don't know if i would even go for a vacation home but um yeah i would say right around just shy of half a million my gosh to go through what we went through and how so we know six months for the sperm

how about the other process? How long have you been going through this? Two years. Two years. Yeah. And what's the current? What's the most latest update? The most latest update is that we're waiting for testing to come back from our surrogate to do like all of the transfers. We're doing like mock cycles and making sure everything is like lined up. Yeah. Because we only have three embryos. We have three shots at this. And I say only in like the most appreciative way. Of course. Of course. We're blessed to have three embryos. But you know, I have friends who have 20 in storage, right? And like they have 20. shots. Yeah. We on the other hand of three. So it's like how do we, you know,

we have to be a little more strategic and or we have to go do another egg retrieval and go through it all again. Another more and a half million bucks. I'm like looking around like when is this going to end? Before you know it, Colton's like, I'm done with reality TV. He's like, all right, I'll be the bachelor. Two million bucks.

God. George, no. I would, I can't do that. I'm just having fun. I'm just having fun. Oh, that's good stuff. Well, Colt. Congratulations on everything. I mean, you're full circle of life. Your growth is a human, professionally, personally, obviously, financially, soon to be, knock on wood, fingers crossed, a father. It's been seven years of knowing you. And there's been these highs and lows and lefts and rights. But from the day I met you,

I gravitated towards you. I always learned from you. I'm continuing to learn from you. And I appreciate our friendship. I wish you the best. And it's been so much fun having you on trading secrets. Yeah. But I got to wrap with a trading secret. So you've had a wild journey. You've learned a lot through your days and you've done a lot. And a trading secret is something you can't get in a textbook. You can't get into a YouTube or TikTok tutorial only from Colton in your experience. So what trading secret can Colton Underwood leave us with? I would just say the overall arc of this is going to be start somewhere. You have to, you have to start. You can't just like have it. And I mean that from even like from as recent

what we were just talking about my fertility journey. There is other. paths to parenthood. I'm speaking from a very privileged place where I have resources to spend to build my family. It's a choice I made and I'm lucky to have that and I'm appreciative of having that. There's other options. There's adoption. There's foster. You can go through. So we want to start somewhere. If you want a family, go down the path of exploring something that is right for you and that you can afford and that you can have. Same with your career. Like if you want to be on TV, start somewhere. like look up an open casting call walk in try to like take your shot and like you never know so just like starting is a big deal and that's also authentic to my like start somewhere if you need to come

out start somewhere if you are trying to be the best version of you get better yeah i love it i love it you got to start somewhere if you don't there's no way to end up where you are and even through your lessons you starting somewhere sometimes it was proactive in your initiative and your competition and your drive. And sometimes, like you did with your Netflix show, it's like you forced yourself with other people's push to start somewhere. But at the end of the day, all those things led to a theme of start somewhere. So that's a perfect way to wrap up this episode with Colton Underwood. Colton, I know you have so much going on with your legacy and your podcast and everything else. Where can people find each of those things? At the Daddy Hood podcast on

Instagram at Colton Underwood and at Colton's legacy. There we go. Yeah. We will be following along. Thank you for being on this episode of Traying Secrets. There we go.