Trailer Park Boys Presents: Park After Dark - Episode 13 - Sunnyvale vs. Sunnyvale

Episode Date: September 21, 2026

Housos star Franky beams in from Australia, for the ultimate f**ked cultural exchange! Which country has the dumbest cops, greasiest strippers, and best jails? And could Julian outdrink a Māori?! Plus: How to deal with a face crab emergency!

To watch the video version of this, go to trailer park boys plus.com. That'd be a stooge. Welcome to the park after the dark. We got a pretty crazy one, I guess, happening today, no? Look who's got a lot of energy today? You know what? That would sound pretty fucking professional. Well, I smoked a joint.

About five minutes ago, it hasn't quite kicked in yet. So I'm probably going to be a little more quiet here shortly. But right now I feel good. Good energy. All right. So, yeah, we got a special guest today. all the way from down under From the other side of the world

Or as you say You drill a hole down Where we are You'll pop up to where he's at Here we go It's from another Sunnyvale Another Sunnyvale How's those

You guys have been watching On TPB Plus I've watched It's fucking pretty funny You know what Those guys are fucked up They are fucked up They could be more fucked up

than us But I want to get to know these guys I think there could be some potential here You know I was being some long time friends here I feel like Frankie's like One of our brothers From a different country mother

I feel like too. Anyway, all right, let's go. Let's chipper, get this fucker on. Hey, what's going on, Frankie? A lot, I'm from Australia, and there's a time difference. And I had some strippers lined up. I was going to put on a show, but it's peak, like it's middle of the night here.

It's their peak time, so they couldn't come. They canceled, so sorry about that. I did have a whole show, but it's the time difference, you know? It's all right. Hey, no worries, man. I worked at a strip club called Aristocrat for a lot. of years so this is the time they make the money man this is when the money starts coming out people start getting a buzz on the customers and money starts getting thrown around man i gotcha

i just want to say cheers to canadia thanks for having my shows on your thing thanks so much and i like them truckers what they did and uh i heard the maple soup's good but those mounted police things that's authority so i don't i can't them hats you know yeah i can't yeah i don't appreciate none of that. But the rest is good from what I've seen. No, fuck that. You know what? What was the... I can't believe you heard about the trucker thing, man. Like, I don't even know. What was that about? It was just, yeah, there was a lot of protesting going on.

See, I'm on the pulse of anything that's anti-authority, man. And they was trying to wreck the government and that. And you had that... Wasn't he like a prime minister or something who rooted for D'El Castro was the father and the mother was rooting around? I get into conspiracies, man. And that was a mad story. I mean, you know, look, they had just have a communist run on that country. That's weird.

Anyway, I don't know nothing about politics, ma'am. Now he's dating Katie Perry. Yeah, yeah, now he's dating Katie Perry. Do you see that? And I think it's dating. I don't know. I don't know her. But you know what?

He does look. He does look like Castro. You're right. When you put pictures up with those guys. So I don't know. His mom got around. She bang one of stones. He doesn't.

You can't miss a big head like that. No, you can't. That head's too big for a body. You can't. Plus, she hooked up with Mick Jagger. That's what they say. You know, she was giving it to everybody.

Yeah. I still can't understand how it's almost like it's the next day over in Australia. Yeah, it's, these guys are 13 hours ahead. That's, so it's like fucking, it's like, it's almost midnight there, man.

That's crazy. You know what's really fucked up? He thought that if you were to dig a hole straight down where we are, you went right through the earth, it would come up where you guys are. Be close. I don't know, man. Who knows? But some people say the Earth is on flat, so I don't know what that's about either. I mean, maybe you would just go ahead and space. I don't know, man. I heard the moons fly as well.

Fuck sakes, Ricky. Don't get me on conspiracies, man, because I can go all might. Do you think the Earth is flawed? Do you think people are fucked? Both? I don't know. I mean, you know, I went that far down the rabbit hole. I got a rabbit on back. So I'm right down the rabbit hole, man. Nice. We got to understand. We live in a bunch of trailers, right?

You live in a house, like, what the fuck is a housos? What is that? I don't understand that. It's short. See, in Australia, when you got, like, the government housing, they call it housing commission. And in Australia, we abbreviate everything. So if your name was like Barry, you would be Baza.

if your name was Darrell or David, you would be Daza, something like that. So instead of Housing Commission, they just abbreviated it to Houses. So if you live in the Housing Commission, you're a house. That's it, you know. It's on government. They give a fee for free. They'll give you a house? Are you fucking kidding me?

Oh, nice. There's cheap rent, but, you know, like, you know, it's basically free. Look, I mean, you know, we're on pensions, mate. I've got such a bad back. I can't even barely walk from all the freecums that I've had. So I deserve that pension and many of the other pensions that I'm on. I don't know. Don't you just have this sort of pension system in Canada?

No, not really. Well, your dad, your dad was doing that. Yeah, but you got to pretend. You're telling me, all right. So you've got a bad back. You're not like just fucking over the government or you just don't want to talk about it. Well, look, I mean, I can run faster than most of the cops in Sunnyvale. I don't know.

I knew it. I fucking told you, man. He was fucking... I can't believe. I hope this is his board... Look, just put this on in Canada and not in Australia, so that way the coppers won't know and the government won't know not keep the pensions, mate.

But it's getting hardy, mate. They're cracking down. You know, it's... It's getting tough. All right. How dumb are the cops there? On a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being really dumb? What do you think?

Yeah, it's definitely a 10. A 10? A stupid, man. Jesus. A bunch of George Greens. I love it. We got, look, you know, the crack. The crazy thing, they're going, they're going, are you allowed to have guns in your country?

Is it easy to get a gun? If you're going to hunt, it's pretty easy to get one. Yeah, they are illegal, but. You're not allowed walking around with one. Well, handguns. You can have rifles and shotguns. You just can't have handguns. Yeah, handguns are legal.

We can't have nothing. Well, the crazy thing is all the Lebanese gangsters who live next to me, they got all of them. They're shoot-outs every day. It's the regular studios don't get the guns, but the gangsters have the guys. It's a crazy. Australia used to be cool, man, but it's a crazy. Don't Murphy. Stay where you are. Oh, really?

I don't know. Do you have a problem with Indians everywhere, too? Well, there's a lot of people from different countries here. Yeah, there's a lot of people, man. A lot of Emmys. Yeah. We call them Emmys because they're immigrants, right? What do you call them?

Emmys. Emmys. We call them refos. For refugees. Oh, refugees. Okay. Emmys and, okay. Yeah, so, I mean, yeah, it's a bit different here now.

And it's a different world. It's a totally different. different world. So tell, all right, one thing about Ricky, he's fucking, he's fascinated about like fighting different animals. Like he's actually, he's wrestled an alligator before. He says he could beat a bear. You got, you guys got fucking bears there, like grizzly bears? No. No, we've got these little things called koala bears about this big. They're pretty cute. But they make a funny noise. They scream like this. It's a weird noise. That's when they're horny. But no big bears. No, but we got everything else, man. You want to wrestle.

stuff. We've got crocodiles. We've got the most deadliest snakes. We've got everything, mate, you know, I just, you know, the bulls and, you know, bullocks and wild pigs. What about kangaroos? Kangaroos are pretty good boxers, I hear. He wants to fuck over a kangaroo.

Yeah, I don't know. I'm a little bit afraid. One of those kicks in the days. I've got a whole bunch of I got a bunch of bush pigs who are my exes I can hook you up with if you want to wrestle them. They all started about 130 kilos. He's a metric system. They're Canada? You've never heard of this?

No, man. You know, there's a... We heard of ditch pigs. There's a threshold. You've ever heard of the island called Tasmania? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's the bottom, huh? Now, down there, if a chick is over a certain weight limit,

they call them an obesity. Because obese and beast, obese and beast, obese, obesity, they call them obesity. So maybe you can import that to Canada. Canadiah. Do you pronounce a Canadian or Canada? Canada. Canada. Yeah. Canada. Sorry.

Sorry. We're all good. Well, Canada is good, though. Yeah. But yeah. Okay, what about weed? Do you guys have weed down there? Like, how do you make money?

We don't. Mate, it's legal here now. It's legal. I didn't know that. My conspiracy, you know, my conspiracy is on that. I think that these governments are doing it, and they're putting stuff in it, man. I don't think we're getting the good stuff anymore.

I think they're giving us these weird hydroses with brain-connecting like stuff. to make us compliant. Because all the stoners are they used to want to stumble. You know, they used to hate the government. Now they're just lie back. They're snooogers, mate. They're like, they're inert.

Something's changed, man. Something's changed. That's what he's saying. They're saying they put in, like, chips, computer chips in the vaccines. So maybe they're doing that with the weed. I don't trust the government with the weed. I don't either, man.

No. I think the weed's shit here. That's the government weed. Plus is putting him out of a job, which is bullshit. I avoided that vaccinations, man. I should have seen the lengths I went to back. then. They locked us all down, man. The houses, we was all

locked down in a house. Me and all my mates, Shazer and all of them. And we had to sneak out just for weed and for weed and drinking strippers, you know. Yeah, that was a fucked up time. Basically the same thing here, man. Yeah, it was bullshit. We didn't leave the trailer park much

at all, man. They wouldn't let us, man. We was like had coppers making sure we wouldn't leave. We still got out, but, you know, they was watchings. The government, but I hate a party so much, man. You know. Tell me so. Me too. I'm a passion.

What are the jails like down there? Like straight up? Because you know what? From what I heard, like in history class growing up, they used to take a lot of convicts and stuff and then they'd sail over to Australia and just dump them off there and that's how it was basically populated, wasn't it?

Which is pretty cool. I'm only finishing it free. So I'm not real good on histories and that, but I have visited some of the jails personally. You know, look, you know, it depends. depends on some. There are some more modern ones

and some more old-fashioned ones. To be honest, I know half the people in there because they're all from my area. So usually it's just like being at home. But the meals are more regulated and there's less alcohol and dope, just less, but not completely out. We smuggle them in.

There's not what shelving is. You ever heard of shelving? No. No. It's an Australian prison term. Well, there's a secret spot in the human body where you can sneak something in. And that's what we do.

We shelve it and then we take it into the prison. Oh, you put it up your ass. Yeah. Right up the ass. We have different terms for that here. Yeah, it's called sneak it and in up your ass. That's basically. Prison first.

It's a prison purse. Prison purse. I never heard of that. Yeah, yeah. See, you can use these terms, mad. Like, you know. I like this. See, this is mad, man.

This is a mad cultural exchange. It's like we're both the same, but we got different terms. Brothers from different countries. Brothers from different countries, man. Look, I think, you know, from what I've seen on Canada, you know, yes, we love drinking. You know, we hate authority, you know,

and the English originally started with both the countries. Not that that means nothing. You've got those Frenchies over there, too. That sounds confusing. I know nothing about that. It's confusing, man. Yeah, there's a whole province that's peaceful. How does that look, man?

How do you just have half like French and half English? It sounds like you just, everyone got the shits all the time. Kind of like that. And everything, like everything like, you see in the supermarket, it's got to be in French and English. So everything's in French and English, man. Yeah. And that's only, I don't know, I can't speak French.

I don't know what the fuck. I guess I am French, but I don't speak French. His last name is Lafleur. Yeah. Do you ever hear of Guy Lefleur, the hockey player? We don't really have hockey there, you mean, it's too hot, you know? Oh, fuck, yeah. There's some ice rinks and that, but, you know, it gets,

it's pretty hot here most on the time. So what do people do with what kind of sports are they play? They're like football is it which is like soccer? We call it rugby rugby. We have like a different sports man In Sunnyvale there's a lot of different sports There's bong throwing there's you know the 200 metres sprint from the coppers with the taser

But generally like in the most part of society They like rugby league is probably the big one And Australian rules we have our own game called Australian rules they're the two big ones. The rest, I don't know. I mean, I don't really watch much sports. I've had a bit of a crack at MMA, but I prefer to use weapons, you know.

Yeah, me too. We're too. A lot easier. Yeah. Who has time to roll around the fucking dirt, putting people in chokeholds? Tell me something. Get to, I train.

I've done that training once, man. And the guy's balls is right in your face the whole time. The UFC, I mean, I don't know, man. There's choke. I think there's just a little bit, I mean, I'm, you know, it's just not my thing to get that close to a guy's balls in a fight. That's what I say the same thing. I'd rather buy.

I'd rather stand up and fight, you know what I mean? Yeah, it's just grappling and shit. I can't, I don't know, ground at that. I'm not, I don't want to be hugging with some dude sweating on me and shit. 69 and yeah. Well, look, look, nothing, nothing against, you know, people who swing the other way, man. Look, I'm a big fan of lesbians. Look, I've seen all their movies.

I love lesbians. I've collected all their DVDs back in the day, you know, so, I mean, actually, I have a joke on lesbians. What do you call lesbians in a bushfire? What? BBQ. He's had barbecue's dead, don't you? Jesus Christ. I've heard that one before, man. I'm using that.

Yeah. That was fucked up. So tell me something. We were down in Australia years ago, and we went all to a bunch of different fucking places. It's big. You got, that's a big fucking... He should have called me, much. He should have called me. I would have hooked you up with the best knife and fight the striven.

We had no idea, man. We would have been there in a second. Yeah, I would have fucking spent the whole time in Sunnyvale. But Tell me something. Is there, what is it like between you and people? Because we went to New Zealand, right? What is it, what is it like between you guys in Australia to the New Zealand people? Is there like you guys like, hey, my buddies?

Or you're like, fuck you guys. We're better. What is it like? No, no, look, we get along, but the New Zealanders, unfortunate have a bad reputation of rooting sheep. Routing means fucking. I think I don't know. Like, that's, I don't know where that can come from.

But that's just the reputation that they have. I don't know why. There's a lot of sheep in New Zealand. So they're known, like over here, we would say that if you're a New Zealander, can I say sheepfucker or you? Yeah, yeah, yeah, you can cheat. No, look, the New Zealanders, we don't care. Look, I care for the Kiwis, my good mate, he's a Maori, you know.

I'm that's the thing, there's white New Zealanders, and then there's the Māori and there's big differences. Like, the Māori's pretty tough, man. They're like, they're all pretty crazy. I tell you what, you don't want to go drinking with them one for one, because you can't keep up with a Maori, mate. You know, like drinking with a Maori is like trying to, you know, box with Muhammad Ali or Mike Tyson.

They're champions of drinking. I did it once and went south. Went bad. I don't want to take my own horn here, but I can drink a fucking ton. Let me tell you. I've been over to Ireland where they're like major whiskey drinkers. And I've,

those, they couldn't keep up, man. I'm sorry, I challenge you. I'll give you some money today. Fly over to New Zealand. Take on the first Maori, you see.

We'll be on the floor and they'll be still drink a party. I'd like to see. Like Annie Mary, I can, you're talking. like any Mary. I can just say, hey, buddy, we're going to get drunk. A seven-year-old will beat you. I'm telling you. Oh, fuck that, man. Frankie. No, man. I love it.

This is the only thing we're not going to agree on today, because I can fucking drink a lot, man. I'm telling you, like a lot. I'm telling you, I'm putting my money on the Maori if you're putting some, if there's imbents on it. I was going to have to put my money on the Mary too from the sound. Fuck you. What do you mean? You're going to put your money in the news. I would put 10 grand on me. I'm bringing some Maori with me. And, We'll see how you get. I would drink with a bunch of Mary.

I would take on many Mary's. I would love to see it. Man, I'm telling you. Any kind of drink you want, except for beer. I don't drink just the hard stuff. Beer is shit. What do you like to drink? Yeah, I don't know.

Look, somebody stole my bourbon bottle and I had to steal some wine. I don't even drink wine. I don't even like this stuff, man. The bourbon got stolen today. It's a little thieving goes on in sunny, well. So you guys are still getting bourbon. You know what? We don't get bourbon anymore.

We can't get it from the. States because we don't we don't carry any fucking alcohol from the US now it's it's crazy it is no bourbon well there's a crazy person running the country oh one minute you're talking on the don't chump yeah it's things are a little different now but i tell you it's funny you're talking about that don't chump um i always look at him and i think what is that fake tan color he has on his head that orange because i don't know about you but i fucked a lot of strippers and i've seen all of the the fake tans that they have you know you go into their medicine cabs And normally the brands of the barley, the Caribbean, that the color.

But he's, I have to work, what is that brand color? And I worked that out. First I thought it was Dorito color, but it's not, mate. If you want to check what the color is, look at Umpa Lumpur. It's the same orange, man. Unpulipas. He doesn't do the white. You know who the Upa Lufans are.

Yeah, I do, man. Charlie. From that film. From that film with the Wonka, with the chocolate. The chocolate tractor. Yeah, man. That's a good, that's a good fucking film to watch when you're big. Big time.

It's true. It's kind of the same orange. I never thought about that. I never really thought about his orange color. He's the same color, man. Yeah. I guess we get to see him. I'm so much more.

I can just see it. Side by each. Umpa Lumpa and Donald Trump. But, mate, I don't know, but do we get, like, not allowed into America just for saying that? Fuck, I shouldn't have said that. Not that I'm going to be able to leave the country because of my criminal record anyway,

but just saying, you know. We might have a problem now getting into the America. We definitely. I think he watches everything, doesn't. That's what they say He watches fucking everything, man You don't want to fuck him over Kimmy Jimmel got fucked

Who did? Kimmel Jimmy Jimmel Jimmy Kimmel He got fucked over by him Yeah Yeah He's on a shit list

Man So what do you do I don't really follow politics much man But I tell you what There's You know I hate authority But there's only one world leader I think would back you up

In a fight in the Like in a You're in Okay Picture this Okay It's 3 AM You're in the car park of

McDonald's in Canada somewhere, and there's got to be a fight. And the coppers are coming with the tasers. There's only one world leader who's going to back you up, man. Yeah. Who's that? Who's that? I don't know enough from his politics. He's staunchy gets around with his shirt off.

He has martial arts. That's the guy I want to back me up. He'd take a taser. Putin. I reckon he would. Putin. He's supposed to be tough as fuck, I guess. But I don't know.

KGB, man. Yeah. He's had some training. Well, he's not on a war. I reckon he's that. Yeah. I didn't mean to interrupt you. But I reckon he's that staunch.

He walks through that Siberian snow in a G-string with a maxi bottle of vodka, and he could scold the whole thing. He wouldn't even, and he talks to him, right, and do doubly, do-d-d-d-d-l-d-a. You know, he doesn't even feel the cold. And I reckon he orders his dick to stay, like, half-stiff, even in that mad Siberian minus 30, and not get any shrinkage. Otherwise, it knows it's going to get thrown out a window of poison. And it salutes him every time he talks to it.

The doubler, do-d-d-d-d-d-d-and-a. And the dick's just saluting him. That's how staunch, I reckon. That's some trend Stanch. Do you use that word Swee's that word in Australia? Storantz. Okay. So you're saying he's walking around

with a chubby on like a half herd all the time. Is that what you're saying? I don't think he's allowed to get no shrinkage even in that cold. I think he's that tough. You know what? It's like animal behavior because chippanzis do that too, you know. When they want to get into a fight, they get a heart on and they're like,

come on, you see this thing? I'm not afraid. Because you can't get a hurt on when you're terrified, right? I've never seen that documentary. I want to see that one. Well, yeah, the apes and the gorillas do that. When are you watching that sort of stuff? I watch it in jail, man.

You watch everything in jail. I know a lot of shit, man. A lot of shit. What do you get busted for? You know, look, I mean, what's your kind of... See, I'm always in for, like, fighting the coppers. That's always my thing, you know, like usually. But what's your, what are they busting you for?

We don't usually fight them. If you fight a cop down here, it's going to make things a lot worse. You're going to jail for a while. You've got to, you got to, just tell them to fuck off. You can swear as much as you want. You can call them anything you want. It doesn't matter. But the cops aren't that smart around here, man.

No. Well, you got city cops, right? And then you got RCMPs and they're different. The RCMP What's I say a and Bay stand for? The Royal Canadian Mounted Police. They didn't do with the hats and the horse. Yeah. They don't, they don't fuck around. You don't fuck with them. They don't

care. You can try to smooth talk them and they're just like, fuck you get in the car, you idiot. but the city cops They still have red jackets and that Yeah yeah they They don't A while not really

They got the horses For ceremonies and shit They do that when they want to show off I think You know look at us We're fucking tough But yeah They're the city cops

For the ones that are fucking stupid Especially the Sunnyvale Super city cops They're fucking dumb man And they'll put you in jail We go to jail like You know for a day or two mostly It's for stupid shit

But no more than three months At a time Because you know You're hanging around With a bunch of dudes for three months It's not cool That's a one one thing about jail. There's a lot of dumb people in jail, right? Yeah. And you got to deal with them.

But you can make money off them in jail? Do you guys, can you... The lack of chicks. There's a lack of chicks is a problem. It's a very big problem. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Are you allowed bringing chicks into your jail? Like, every now to, you know, what is that? We don't have that figure. I've seen that in movies. And every time I go to jail, I suggest it to them. I say, can we just do that thing that you see in the movies where there's a rooting in a, like a caravan? We call it a caravan. I think he's call a trailer. Yeah.

But no. Doesn't happen. I mean, look, you know, I have seen God, I sneak a bit of action in the visiting room. You've got to be quick, but there's, you know, the guards turn, you've got to get in quick. But it's possible. You know, just get it all ready and, you know, just come quick.

You got to be prepared. It's just not the same, though. There's a bit of an excitement to that, though. That's the only shitty part about jail, really? There's no chicks. No, no shit, man. But you can't get conjugal visits, though, every now and then.

No throwing you into trailers. You can and can't. Oh, yeah. In your country, you can do that. Once in a while, yeah. You got to be like married and shit, but, you know, there's ways around that as well. Because they're stupid. That's why.

Fucking out, man. I don't want moose to Canadian. It sounds good over the... What about smoking? I don't know. I don't like the idea. I don't like the idea of those cops with the big hats and the red jackets. Yeah.

And it's cold here, man. It can come in from far. We get a lot of snow in the winter, right? The winter's not great here. So we're kind of like Putin would come up here and fucking think it's great, I think. We do try to go to jail for a lot of the winters. Yeah. It's freezing cold, huh?

It gets like minus 30, minus 40. I don't know if that's... Minus fucking 30. No, it doesn't. Jesus. Minus 20. Oh, yeah, it does. It's been that cold, though.

Can you smoke wherever you want in Australia or do they have rules about that? No, look, I tell you, you know, Australia used to be the best place in the world. We used to hate authority. Like, it was part of the country's, like, you know, the thing we used to do. But now all these dicky governments come in. They've ruined everything, mate. You can't do nothing. Mate, I could go on and on, but I'll just get angry and, you know, like,

yeah. Don't move here, mate. Stay there because our rules are fucked. We're the most, we're getting worse and worse, mate. You know, if I could sneak out, I'd probably go to somewhere like, I don't know, Thailand. That would be good. I've heard Thailand's good and I heard they just legalized shit. So, yeah, it might be.

It's on the list. I would have been in a country where you can bribe a cop, I look that's that's more kind of country yeah see we're on the same page for sure yeah yeah you can do that in jamaica can't do that here you can bribe cops in jamaica oh yeah oh yeah man i've heard of people actually killing people in jamaica and then saying hey here's 200 bucks and they'll say just get rid of the body don't worry about it true true story geez all right i'm not that i don't want to kill anybody that's no fuck but you should be able to you know pay a cop off how much did I charge well i heard about

this one guy who he was attacked by this guy who had a machete. So he shot him. And he was in the bathroom at some bar. And then the cops were there. And this guy was like one of these military dudes. And he shot the guy and he was just like, hey, the guy came at me with a machete while I was taking a piss. And I shot him.

And the cop was like, okay, well, 200 bucks, you get rid of the body. So he gave him 200 bucks. 200 bucks. 200 bucks. 200 bucks. You have my choice. You had to get rid of this fucking guy.

This dead guy in the bathroom. That's cheap. You had to go throw him in the fucking jungle. Not as cheap. Well, it was cheap. That was like, that was probably about 15 years ago, so I might be a little bit higher now. It could be like 500 bucks in a box.

I'm telling you, if it's, if it's only that cheap, I'm organizing a bloody tour, tour thing with all my exes to go there because I'm sick of the child support, mate. It would be cheaper to pay the hit man for the, for the 200 per, I've got about 12 or 15 exes. You know, you're paying child support. I don't know.

Trial support for 12 or 15 people. Well, you know, it's a lot of money, mate. So I think this Jamaica thing would be cheaper. Well, yeah, I mean, it's easy to get someone to go on vacation to Jamaica with you. It's a good time. Probably pretty far from Australia, though, wouldn't it? I'm glad we've had this conversation, man. You've got my brain going.

I think I could get into a country like that. I know I can't get into some countries because on the criminal record, but this place, mate, if they're taking 200 bucks to knock people off, mate, a couple of bucks will get me full customs. They don't care, man. And you know what? Do you like Bob Marley? You go on his tour.

There's guys there giving you all kinds of weed. You're getting high. You're looking at Bob Merle's grave. Oh, it's fucking great, man. Sounds all right, man. I didn't know you did that. Yeah, man. I did that.

You can go swim with the fucking dolphins if you want. It's a dick of me, man. I didn't even know you could do tourism like this where there was Bob Marley and you can get people knocked off. What a top country, man. It's awesome. I'm going to have to save up a bit, but. And the women are beautiful.

It's fucking paradise, man. That sounds all right. You don't bullshit me, I, because fuck, that tease me about this shit, and I'm going to get it whipped up, and I'm going to Google it later, and it doesn't match what you said. No, man, and I could also,

I've got access to getting you some passports to get in if you're, you know, if you're fucking worried about that shit, but they'll let you in, man. They just want your money. I love this place, man. That is the truth is to you for this great information. Yeah, and there's another place. El Salvador is pretty nice, too.

That's a good place to go. Oh, yeah? Yeah, they're not fucking around there. It's nice. It used to be fucked. It used to be totally, Now they're cleaned up. You can go there, no problem.

Where's El Salvador? That's down by Costa Rica, you know, around that area. It's in the Gulf, I think. I've been looking at it, man. I've been looking at these places. I want to get the fuck out of here for the winter. I don't want to go to jail. I want to go somewhere hot, man.

Yeah, man. Winter sucks here. El Salvador. So I'm guessing that's in like South on America there somewhere. Yeah. He's right down South America, right up the top. That's fucking beautiful. beautiful there. Black sandy beaches.

It's fucking great, man. Really? Yeah. Sounds like... Is it which country? Which countries? Is it the country where the, with the Mexican hats? Or is it the one with the cocaine? Or the Nazis ran away? The cocaine.

It was full of cartel, I guess. I know some people. I know some people who can get in there. I do, man. Some political help. All right. So that's another one. There's two places you can go to.

We need to meet somewhere, man. It would sound like brothers from different countries. It would be great to hang out. We can meet somewhere in the middle. I think maybe Jamaica might be in the middle. No, no, no, no. It's not. No, we might have to go to Mexico, man.

Do you ever want to go to Mexico? I like the idea of that place because everyone thinks I am a Mexican because of my mustache. I had to, well, normally I have it like the full thing. But I went down on the cheek the other day, and I got a bit of crabs. So I had to kind of shave the crabs off. Oh, man. Don't tell. It's been trimmed at the moment.

You've had crabs. How long did it take for you to get rid of the crabs? They're nasty. I shaved them out quick. No, I was lucky because I went down and I felt them jumping and I just shaved it quick before they got to the top section. But unfortunately, I have the smaller moat.

This happened two days ago, mate. I don't know what it's like in your Sunnyvale, but our sunny veil, mate, the girls. You're lucky. You know what? They get up in your eyebrows and everything. I know a guy had it for like four weeks straight, he couldn't get rid of little fuckers.

They're not fun. You use this, there's a shampoo, qualata. Coilada shampoo. That knocks the little fuckers out for a bit. Doesn't kill them. They're still down there fucking making noise. But, you know, doing that. Did you ever take, like, a magnifying glass and zoom in on one a little bit?

I do think it. It felt like my face was like a, like a science. They got the pincers. They got these going. You get the magnifying glass they're looking at going, what the fuck? They're doing that, man. What they look like? What?

Like lobsters, man. No, like crabs. They actually look like crabs. It's fucked. Like actual crabs. Yeah, and they like stint, like, how would you get them on your face? Because I went down on a big bush, mate. You know, she hadn't shaved for fucking four years.

She went to jail just got out and the bush was mad, mate. It was like, you know, I'll tell you what, if she had been smoking near that bush, she could have started a bushfire and the Rangers would have to come up with a fire danger. It was that bushy, mate. It was like Michael Jackson in the fucking 70s, mate. It was big. All right. Well, if you got like an alcohol swab or something,

swab or something, that'll kill, that'll knock them out for a bit, all right? Any kind of alcohol? Spill some. No, lucky, man.

Seriously, as soon as they jumped, I jumped back straight away, ran to the cabin, got the shiver and just shaved them out. And that was it. It was a lot of the situation before, so, you know.

It could have spread real quick. They spread fast. And another thing, you get into a pool with someone has crabs, little fuckers float on the top and they're like this, ready to hook on to you.

So you can be an innocent bystander and get crabs. Does that happen to you? It didn't happen to me, but it almost did. Maybe. I actually got bitten on the dig, buy a crab, actual crab ones. No, that's another story. Not the little one. That's my worst nightmare.

That would suck. That's not good, man. There's a lot of crabs around here, both kinds. What do you, like, in Australia, like, so we have, like, a pub is like a local thing. Yeah. The main thing you go out drinking whatever is like the pub or the club. So the club is like maybe related to a football club or like rugby league club. They have a, you know, club like that.

Poker machines and stuff. Or there's a pub. What do you just have there? Like, is it similar? Yeah, we got lots of pubs. Pubs in. Nightclubs, I guess. Nightclubs.

They call the nightclubs and ones to stay open until like three or four in the morning. They're more like dance bars and hookup bars. Strip clubs. Okay. Here's a good question. And strip clubs there, do they take everything off or they just like the tops? No, they do here. You know what?

Most of the world don't. No. They don't do it. Down the states, nope. You go to a strip club, it's just the tops come off. And sometimes they have things over there. Girls and guys. Nipples.

Yeah, they got a task. You know what? I've got a bone to pick with America, man. Okay. Because back in the day, before they done this stupid pole dancing thing that they imported with the tipping and all that, the strip clubs in the Australia is to be different. They used to be like, they used to seriously get full nude. They used to, this is real, man.

Okay. The strippers used to actually pick someone from the audience and fuck up on the stage. No, they did. I swear this is true. This is how it used to be the old days. And then they put the pole in and the G strings and the tipping. The Americans ruined it for everyone, mate. I think they did.

I didn't know that. I had no idea that was going on down there. That's a whole different experience. That's, you know what? You'd see that over in France, I bet. Yeah, I've heard of people like banging. Definitely. There's definitely places in the world.

have live sex. Not around here, man. Not maybe. Maybe in Quebec. I heard it. Have you ever heard this? I looked on the internet. In Thailand, they said that the chicks shoot balls out of their pussies or something. Oh, yeah, they've seen that pink pong balls. That happens all over the place around here in Canada. Yeah. They do that. Oh, that's not.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. It's a knock. That's a good set. What's the point of that, man? You have to return or? It is a bit weird. It's showing off their. souvenirs. Their muscles down there, I guess. I don't know. Is it like a sports game?

If you get the game ball, you feel like a champion or what happens? I think you just get a... Oh, you grab one. It's just like, yeah, it's like the thing. You get it, you catch a ball if you go to a Yankees game or Toronto Blue Jays game. I don't really think it's the same, but... Well, no, I mean, you're not going to go home and show your wife the ping pong ball that you got and, you know, explain it. Put it in a glass case.

Or put it, yeah, you might want to put it in a glass case. I don't know, maybe get an autographed. I don't fucking know. It's just, I don't know. It's like Cirque d'Halee, I think. If you got a talent. You guys have traveled. And you guys have traveled all.

I haven't been many places, man. I only been like, honestly, I was in Thailand once, but when we went there, it was a whole thing. A friend of mine was smuggling some dope. Oh, fuck. It all kind of got involved in that. I didn't get to enjoy the, you know, the good things that was there, you know? That's what work does, man. You can't be working all the time.

You gotta have those times where we're relaxed and not de-stress, right? That's what I'm trying to retire. How are you making money right now? Same old thing? Well, you know, look, I mean, I don't know what I can say on the thing here, but, you know, like,

if you ever heard the ACDC song Dirty Deeds done dirt cheap? Yeah. Oh, yeah. That's probably what I put as my job description. I like that. Yeah. That's good. I like Frankie, man.

Yeah, me too. I wish we could do business. We got a lot of fucking disson. between us. There's got to be something we can do. There's got to be something we can do. You know, I have a lot of connections in that. But, you know, I think where my strength as, well, not that I do a lot of business,

but, you know, if there's a problem, usually I can think on a problem to wait to fix it. You know, like I can work like an idea on my brain. That's what I'm known for in our son, you know. Yeah, me too. Me too. Me too. Well, not, no, not you.

You're not the problem solving. man. I wouldn't say that you're solving anything. A lot of people think I'm the smartest one. I don't know. That's not true. You know, look, I mean, there's one thing I can tell straight away out of the two of you. I think where me and you, Blonde, is we're like the Fonzie's of our area. Look, if you know that show. Oh, me. You're talking about me.

No, me. Him? Yeah, no, you. Yeah. The black T-shirt, of course. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you know what? It says it all. The Fonzs. Did you watch the Fonds growing up?

Oh, fuck. Of course, mate. Of course I love the Fons. I see Fons in you and, I don't know. I like to become the Fons of Sunny Bell. Thanks for the compliment, man. You know what? I see it in you too.

You know, I grew up. The Fons was one of the biggest influences of my life. Because he was cool. And he didn't fuck around. And he got the ladies. And he was a gentleman most of him. That's it. That's it, man.

Now you're talking. Move a bike. Fucking jump the shark. He did everything. Thanks, man. Frankie. He looks more like the Ritchie Cunning. of your area.

Fuck, man. Richie Cunningham on lots of doing. You have no idea. Lots of drugs. Someday we will get together and you will see it. That's probably like

Richie Cunningham. You're like Richie Cunningham. Did Richie Cunningham grow dope? I reckon if No. I reckon if the, if Happy Days was done like in like the modern era,

Richie would be stoned all the time. Oh, fucking rights you would. Foggs would be hooking him up. Yeah. You know what? I can deal with. that. We should all, we should do like modern day happy days, boys.

You know what I mean? We just need to pull out. We need to, we need to fucking connect and we need to get fucked up and. We need a Chachi. Who could Chachi be? We're going to have to do this again for sure. All right, we'll talk more about that. We've got to go. We got some shit to deal with right now.

But fuck, Frankie, man, it's been great talking you, brother. Fucking right. This is good. We've got to do this again. I've always felt like I would love you's Canadians. I never met many, but after this conversation, use our brothers from another mother's. And, fuck, yeah, like, any time

you need something I can send over, you want to fight a kangaroo, come over and I'll fucking find, I don't know, I'll fucking find one. So, yeah. Awesome, we're doing it. Thanks for having me and cheese to use and go Canadian. We'll have to do this again.

And I'll tell you, don't let that fucking Donald Chuck change the name of the lake. I've seen something on the internet. Don't fucking let him, mate. He's getting too fucking big. Yeah, don't get him going on that. I don't understand it. It makes no fucking sense.

Yeah, man. Nah, we didn't even name it. You know what I mean? Fuck. It's fucked. All right. All right, my brother. Cheers, Frankie.

Cheers. Keep drinking. Love from Canada or Canada. We'll be talking again soon, my friend. Australia, mate. Don't come me because there's too many coffers. Okay, all right. We'll still go.

We're going, man. We're still going to go. All right, cheers, brother. If you got any ideas or comments about Parac after Derek, you can write us, at padstuff at trailer park boys.com. That's P-A-D-S-T-U-F-F at trailerparkboys.com. Nice spelling, man. Was it right?

Yeah. Nice.