Trash Tuesday w/ Esther Povitsky & Khalyla Kuhn - Bobby Lee's New Dream

Episode Date: February 3, 2026

BTS, BONUS CONTENT AND MORE! Only on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/c/TrashTuesdayPodcast     Thank you to out sponsors:Thank you Hers! Visit www.forhers.com/TRASHTUESDAY  to get a personalized, affordable plan that gets you We love BetterHelp! Sign up and get 10% off at www.BetterHelp.com/TRASHTUESDAY   Thank you Bilt! Join the loyalty program for renters at www.joinbilt.com/TRASHTUESDAY  We love HomeChef! Visit www.HomeChef.com/TRASHTUESDAY   for FIFTY PERCENT OFF your first box and free dessert for life MORE BOBBY!https://www.instagram.com/bobbyleelive/?hl=en  https://www.bobbylee.live/  https://www.youtube.com/@BadFriends https://www.youtube.com/tigerbelly   *Listen to Esther's New Solo Pod!* https://www.esthersgrouptherapy.substack.com *Visit Ebb Ocean Club & Holiday Shop* https://www.ebboceanclub.com/ for Khalyla’s reef safe and biodegradable hair products! FOLLOW TRASH ON SOCIALS: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/itstrashtuesday Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@itstrashtuesday  MORE ESTHER:TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@esthermonster Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/esthermonster/  MORE KHALYLA:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/khalamityk/ Tigerbelly Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/@UCIyIoM_Nd8HtY19fuR_ov2A   PRODUCTION:Studio Ten42: https://www.instagram.com/studioten42/ Guy Robinson: https://www.instagram.com/grobfps/ Arielle Jade (Editor): https://www.instagram.com/jade.rabbit.cce/ Elisa Hernandez Kohler: https://www.instagram.com/ellie.lianna/ Megan Clements:  https://www.instagram.com/egggymeg/ 

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That's homechef.com slash Tuesday for 50% off your first box. and free dessert for life. Home Chef.com slash Tuesday, and you must be an active subscriber to receive free dessert. You know, we have a Patreon. I think it's the funnest place to be. I think you guys are missing out

if you haven't already signed up for the Patreon. And every week when we do edit these episodes, we go, okay, you know what? I shouldn't have shared that. Guys, that's going to the Patreon. Okay? Patreon only. Because I'm too self-absorbed to cut it completely,

but it's got to be in a safe space. Limited audience. And if you join now, you will get instant access to a backlog of a year's worth of bonus content. So if you're just like, I got to have a really great weekend this weekend. Join us on the Patreon at patreon.com slash Trash Tuesday podcast. Mom, I actually really heard. You really crunched down on the toes.

I will crunch forever. Okay. Don't ever put your foot in my face again. I'll crunch it down on it so hard. I'm part Wolverine and part head of honey badge. Do you know that Esther's not over you and I? I'm not over you and I. Yes, you are.

No, I'm not. You say that. You're so, so, being so silly. It makes me so sad. Oh, my God. That's why I'm on Lexa Pro. It will help you sleep, though. It will help you fall asleep.

I know you're taking trashy. I don't know why you're saying that. Does it make you sleepy? It doesn't make me sleep. is in the way right now. That's why you're... But I've been on it for five years. In the way...

Ooh. Pregnancy. What is your view? What is your view? Of Kalila. Oh, God. Can we not go here? Please.

What are we doing here? Can I just know one thing? I've been watching Heeding rivalry, man. I've been jerking after that. Is that weird? Did you get boners watching it? Did you call it Heating rival? Yeah.

He did some of my favorite. Yeah. Well, you burnt through it in one day, right? Mm-hmm. Did it get you turned on? I never watched Brokeback Mountain. It just didn't interest me, you know? I know it was a great movie.

And in my mind, I'm like, do I have some sort of homophobia? And I don't like that. You know what I mean? I want to be a little, you know what I mean? Not be threatened or, you know, when I see men having sexual activities. Yeah. And then so when this, people were talking about this show, I was like, we don't want to give it a try. And I'm into it.

I think I'm going to watch Brokeback too eventually here. I think you should. It's so good. Yeah. Love is love, you know? I found Brokeback Mountain to be slow. It is very slow. but I think that's why I like it.

I think that, you know, Ang Lee, right? How did he relay? He has an accent. Okay, now he's hit. He'd, heat. You have to tease. He's more tender. What are you talking about?

Angli? Yeah. And Jake, you open. Do the tongue, do the tongue like three times like these, right? Then I zoom out, right? You buff. So if you bend the bop, right? Then I do cut, put on the jeep, right?

Then I do drone. Thrown down to your butt, right? And then, and now you calm face. That's Angley directing Roebuck Pound. Can you see yourself on the Asian hot guy character and heated rivalry? No, he's too hot. I think people would be like, I'm out. If it was you?

Yeah. I feel like if you were gay and you were openly gay, you would get so much action. Oh, my God. Of course. Why, of course? It would be a black hole down there. It would be like the Joker's smile. I mean, it would be ripped.

It would be ripped. Are you one of those guys where you feel like you wish you were gay? I wish I was bisexual, maybe. Yeah. Because there's certain male celebrities that I wouldn't mind. Dave, and every guy I've dated always say, always at some point tell me they wish that they were gay. It does seem more fun to be gay.

It's so hard to get action as a heterosexual. When you're like a little ethnic dude. It is. It's harder. It would just be easier to hook up and stuff, I think, if I was gay. Yeah, because I think that that's what Peter Kim was saying. He was like, you don't even need any kind of high hello or like whatever pleasant trees. It's just like eye contact at equinox.

At a spa and then you just get each other off. That's what he says. Yeah, like his husband, boyfriend. Husband. They're domestic. Yeah, domestic is very handsome. Really hot. And he looks like on Mars without like a space helmet.

That's not true. Is that cool? That's not true at all. There's no oxygen. His eyes start, you know what I mean? Right before he implodes. That's what, you know what I mean? That's what Peter Kim looks like.

Very funny guy. But I'm just saying that I think I'm in the same, you know what I mean? I allow it because I understand like when someone looks like me, I will talk about how ugly they are. Esther, you're cute. But I have, I'm insecure about having pale skin. I wasn't tall and blonde. But you're cute and funny.

But so are you. Is there a vibe here? Should I leave? No, no, no, no. You look like a cricket to me. I knew that was coming. The Super Bowl is... I don't know anything about it.

I do. Well, Esther, Esther has a sports corner now. Okay, tell me about it. So last night, Dave told me that there's two relevant girlfriends and wives of the Super Bowl. The recipient, whatever they are, for the Patriots, he has Cardi B pregnant. Stefan Diggs. Oh, you already know this? Yes.

That's her baby daddy. Yeah. So that's exciting. Cardi B is a Patriots fan. What do you call it? A wide recipient? And gay for May is what they're shouting in the Boston bars. What's his name?

Drake. Drake May. He's married to his high school sweetheart. She's like a normal looking woman married to a quarterback. The pressures of these athletes, right, to date hotties, I don't like it. Yeah. I think people should be able to date who they want to date. Oh, she's so cute.

She's cute. Yeah. She's cute. There's a soccer player named Declan Rice. Oh, yeah, Declan from Arsenal. From Arsenal. You know, people make fun of his wife. You know what I mean?

And it's like, I think she's beautiful. Yeah, and he's also, he loves who he loves. It's like, but people rip on him. Like, why isn't your wife hotter? But it's like, why isn't she a supermodel? Why is she a real person? Why does he love her? Yeah, it's such a weird thing.

Like, she dated me. I'm a troll. You know, we had hair. And people would say like, how could you date this little guy? You know what I mean? Did you not believe that she was attracted to you? In the beginning, no. Because that's how me and Dave are.

Dave, like, doesn't understand why I would be attracted to him. Yeah. When I was dating Sarah, remember I told you I was we were holding hands on a beach. Yeah, in Hawaii. And these group of jocks came out and they go, you paid for her, did. And I nearly broke down in tears. That's so hard hurtful. That's such a core wound.

That's what happened. I remember when we were in Phoenix and we were outside of a restaurant, we were holding hands walking. and this young white guy was like visibly enraged by us being like lovey-dovey. Yeah. Like he was like looking back and just being angry

and telling his friends like just looked like he was gonna like punch someone over it. And we were like, what the fuck? This is so weird. How has that affected you? What do you, Larry King? What is going on here?

What? How has it affected me? Yeah. It's always been the driving force of Of my comedy, I think As a young person, I'm like, you know, people bully And, you know, they tease and, you know And I just was like, I have to get out of this

And I have to prove people wrong Do you still feel that way? Do you still feel like the person, you know, On your arm has to fit a criteria for like hot chick? And what does that even mean? Like, is that something that feels like a trophy to you? Well, I mean, I'm attracted to. I'm who I'm attracted to.

I mean, yeah. Yeah, you know, it's like, you know, they don't have to be like a supermodel, but it's like, it's just, sometimes I'll see a girl and go, oh my gosh, she's hot and my friends will go, she's not. But it's like, I'm attracted to who I'm attracted to. I just feel like that would be such a, like, horrible hit to self-esteem if someone's on the beach and it's like you paid for her. Like, that is, that's horrible. And it's racist, straight up. It's like the idea of an Asian. man, you know, getting with a white girl, a tall, gorgeous white girl is like, it doesn't compute

in their head because they obviously think of an Asian man as an inferior sexually in all ways. I do think it's a little gay when guys need to have like a supermodel only. I think so too. What do you mean? You're not into just like a real girl. Like it has to be like the extreme standards that your friends will like. Like that's like suspicious to me. It is gay because they, it's for other men to high five.

him it's not for him to it's not for him only he's doing it as a look at the price to impress other men not impress women so I think when I was younger I was like she's got to be hot but then it's like now I can I know when I go on dates I get bothered so easily you know what bothered by lately I had a date with this girl and I and she gets in the car she goes what's your Bluetooth on the car oh oh my gosh I go why yeah the first I know her and she goes I go why she goes I go why she We're playing my music. Oh, ew, that's, that's annoying.

And I'm like, and then she played Travis Rucker. What's his name? Darius Rucker. Darius Rucker. Yeah. All the whole time. What is that? Darius Rucker.

Darius Rucker. He went country. He's hooty and the blowfish, but then he went country. Yeah. Oh. First of all, the rule is if you're driving, the driver and whoever is car is the controller of the music. Do we not agree?

I agree unless it's like, I don't think the rules are that fast and hard. But for day one? But I think coming in, like, she came in too hot. Yeah. If you're dating a couple months, it's like, yeah, play your playlist. I don't care. You know what I mean? I guess you're right.

It's kind of nice, too, to be in the car and then see what the guy plays. Yeah, that's a little annoying. It's super annoying. Well, so then how did it go, like post that? Like, how did you get over it? Or were you like, oh, I already hate this girl? I tried to smash. That night.

After dinner? I tried. Yeah, yeah. It didn't bother me enough for me not to try to smash. And did it? Did you smash? No. We made out.

Oh, okay. It's super thin lips. I don't like thin lips, but- You don't like thick lips either because you make fun of my all the time. I don't like no lips is it? I just want an opening, you know what I mean? You like Muppets? You know what I mean?

Like, Burt? That's what I want. You know what I mean? Yeah, I try to hook up and then we made a little bit and then I never, and then she tried to text me and I never returned any. Wait, Tinks' theory. Oh my God. Okay.

So there's this influencer Tinks. She's really pretty. And she says, there's this. there's this thing called box theory. And men will either put you in the hookup box or the girlfriend box. And once you are in the hookup box, you can never. A man will never take you from that box to the girlfriend box. Is that true for you?

And she says that for women, it's different. Like women, you could be a girl will have a guy in the hookup box. She wants him in the boyfriend box. But with guys, hookup box, you're there and it's over. So when you first meet someone, are you like immediately like, she could potentially be my girlfriend. I know, I know immediately. Really? Oh yeah.

Once I meet them, I know this person is somebody that I would be in a committed thing with. Interesting. Yeah, but as soon as I meet them. Do you know as quickly like, oh, this person is just a hookup? Yeah. Yeah? And you don't think it could change? You could just, it's an instinctual thing.

You have to wait. It's not the initially, it's a, you wait for them to say like five things. Yeah. Like, you know, all I listen to is Taylor Swift. All right. Hookup box. I'm a Trump supporter hookup box. Like I dated a Trump supporter.

Full blown Trump supporter. How was it? I was six months I was able to do it. As a max. But then like one night she's like, yeah, it wasn't an interaction. They were just like there to protest. I was just like, I can't do this anymore. But she was so hot, I could do six months of it.

Yeah. I feel like hotness really overrides for men. But for girls, like hotness does not override like shit like that. I don't care how hot you are. If you are like, hey, it wasn't an insurrection. Yeah. I couldn't get my pussy wet, not even for a second. Yeah.

Sometimes I can go along with things. I can really transform. I don't know. What do you say, really? It wasn't? I'd like to learn other people's point of views, you know? I'll hear it. I tried with her.

Yeah. I go, why? And she said, well, my family is. What do you? My family is. Oh, Trump's a. Yeah, yeah. And then she said, which was crazy.

She was just like her stance, or that's a stance on immigration. was all of them out. You know what I mean? Like every single one of them. And get this. She was Mexican. Because yeah, the Latinos for Trump. Yeah.

Yeah. We talk about it all the time. So how did it end? Were you just like, hey, I can't do this anymore? No, ghost. Okay. Yeah, ghost is so fun. Ghost is so fun.

It's so easy. It's so much easier than like the confrontation. And what if they're like, hey, I haven't heard from you, nothing? Yeah, did she fall? I go, ooh. I'm a ghost. You're just on a ghost emoji. Yeah, yeah, just a ghost emoji.

I yeah I ghost and then after a while then she would send me photos or her flicking me off like this which is sad you know Were there ever? I don't think that's right I don't think but okay

what if on the first day you go into her bedroom she's like let's have sex and then you see two posters one of Christy Nome and one of Greg Bovino the head of ice or the guy who Stephen Miller

and Stephen Miller like would you still smash? Yeah I mean that would it would depend on her hotness. Yeah. If she was a 10, I could withstand a lot.

I mean, she's still in the only in the hookup category, but I could probably for a year do it. A year is a long time. That's like Jenna's story of like she got snuck into the barracks, like somewhere in the deep south. And they were hooking up and she looks up at the ceiling and she sees like a Confederate flag. Wow. Yeah.

But she, I think, did she resume or not resume? She resumed for a little while. Yeah. And then got out of it. You girls can't do that, though. Why? I mean, hook up.

with a guy that's like has a fucked up believe. Why? I didn't know. Could you? I think I could. I know that's really shitty to say. You think he's hot Tom Hardy? You think he's hot Tom Hardy? Wait, oh Tom Hardy. Yeah. He's like the only hot one. So Tom Hardy he's so hot. He's the founder of the proud boys. Okay. No, I'm being real. But he's like I think you're just the light of my life. Yeah, that to me is like almost my king.

It's like, yeah. It's like beauty and the beast. It's like, oh, the beast thinks I'm pretty and he's not going to like rip my face off. But then I think that for me fundamentally like on I just couldn't feel safe. I don't feel like my physical body is safe around being around them. Um, if they feel as though, certain beliefs make me feel as though, okay, he might potentially like hurt me, hurt me. And that's why I could never. Yes. You're thinking steps further than I am in the moment.

And I, I understand why this is bad. but it's just a way that I feel that I see the hotness and the forbidden love. Romeo and Juliet danger. The forbidden love You are a little man. Why? You are. I always say this. But Dave's the most

undangerous man on earth. He's the sweetest guy I've ever met. I know, but he has his he's a contrarian. He's very argumentative. And he always tells me because I'm, when I was like really scared of mass shootings, he's like the most dangerous person to you in this world is me statistically. He's like, he's like, he's like, like he's the most likely to kill me because he's my partner.

Do you know that? You know that most cases of like homicide towards women are their partners, male partners. So he's always telling me that to like me. Yeah, that makes sense. You could have killed me. Yeah, you could have killed me. Hell yeah.

No, you could have killed me. You almost killed me. How did I kill you? Just like you're nagging. Just nagging, you know like, oh my God. What did I nag about? I think the one thing that like I think, think about is like walking the dogs like I'd be out there with the dogs for like 30 minutes

and like so-and-so didn't poo yet and she's like stay out there until they do right and I'm out there for like hours and I'm just looking up like I fucking hate this bit and you would walk on what twice a year no every day that's that's bullshit no every day when we were living in the small yeah every day yeah yeah what else does she naggy about I think you just thought it was disgusting toward the end you know what's a shock is that I didn't think you were disgusting in the beginning. How did I put up with it? Wait, how did you notice that she thought you were disgusting?

Like, what was it? She's like, stop scratching your foot. Yeah, I can hear it. I'm trying to sleep. Stop scratching your foot. And I'd just be like, you know what I mean, scratching my foot. Yeah, you know what pisses me off the most though?

What? Is that all these things that complaints that I had, he only chose to fix them after the breakup. That's not true. Now that like all these girls get the best version of him and I'm here like, do it's that really true. I don't think people change that much. No, he's changed so much.

What have you changed? Because medication. He's gotten his head right. My head's right. What's changed? A lot more grounded. You know, I, you know, I found a psychiatrist, therapist. I'm really doing work, you know, to better myself.

I was just like out of my mind, I think, when we were together at the end. Yeah. Like addressing the pornography and all that kind of stuff. You are addressing that? Yeah, because, you know, in my mind, I'm like, you know, why didn't this, work and then just kind of looking back and going these are certain some of the behaviors that I should have changed or addressed and I've been addressing them now because in my mind it's like if I'm if I ever find another coliola I want to be able to be better yeah you are already so

much better I mean I would say like even towards me like outside of the romantic relationship I feel like we're better now like I don't rip parts like you know I um no that's not that's not that's Not a crime. No, but with girls, like, before I would be like, I'm going to rip a fart in your face or whatever, you know what I mean? And now it's like, I'll lay there, right, when they're sleeping, and I'll clinch, and I'll clinch, right? And then I'll take my fingers, I'll spread it open and do it,

and do a slow leakage. Because if you do, if you get it all out at one time, you know what I mean, it takes over the room. But what you do is you, and you go, like a, you know, sort of a leakage. You know what I mean? Slowly, right? So it doesn't all come at one time. Or sometimes I'll even get up now and just leave.

Really? And rip it in the bathroom, yeah. That's good. Yeah. That was never a complaint of mine. Like, who cares? Fart? No.

And the other two weeks ago, like, he held me hostage in the bathroom because he wanted me to watch him poo. So nothing really has changed. Why did you do that? We just wanted to witness again. And he was like, look at my poo. You have to look at my poo. Did you have to stay here?

I did. It was funny. It was funny. We were laughing really hard. It was doing out for laugh. Yeah. When people hear that, he's a disgusting.

No, no, no, it was pretty funny. I do everything for laughs. I get it. I'm just thinking of like the point of view of almost, is that like a sexual thing? Is it kinky?

There's honestly, there's, he can do no wrong. I've seen it all. I've seen every single part of him. There's no inappropriate. What are other, like,

memories from the relationship where like, what are we talking about? Why do we always? I want to know stuff about you guys. Like, I'm just curious. It's funny to hear, like, the nagging and, like, the irritation stuff. Like, what else was there? I just want to say that the things that bothered me in the relationship, like, in my mind,

I was like, I want to get out of this, I guess, subconsciously. But in retrospect, it's like, I would take it now. You know what I mean? Because it's like, that's a small price to pay for not being lonely. If I had a time machine, I would probably tell myself, it's like, you know, it's not better out there. Wow. Yeah. But when you're in a long-term relationship, like we were in, you know, eventually you kind of

think, well, I'm famous. I think that too. And I can get out there and like, and it's like, it's not. And I did that and it's like, it's not that. That's not it. But do you think that like towards the end of our relationship as you were getting more and more famous as your career was really like getting up there? Was that a thought in your head where you're like, I'm really curious to see like what

else is out there? Yeah. And that's so human. That is human. I don't even fall. Fair. For that. Yeah.

Yeah. We've been in this for so long. It's like, how can you not be curious? Like, he was getting recognized more. I hooked up with a girl that like, so I don't know if you know this. I probably do. We were seeing each other. In the last couple of years, there was this girl that I was kind of like, I'm obsessed with, but like, oh, she's hot.

Followed her, whatnot. And I would have these fantasies of like. While we were still together. Yeah. Yeah. And then when we broke up, I did. And I remember hooking up with her thinking, this is bullshit. you know what I mean

like I hate this why what do you I mean I mean it was it was like it didn't feel our bodies didn't really you know what I mean it didn't feel right

also some of her beliefs in this she bothered me from the gecko and I was like is that the right word gecko gecko like the lizard or getco

or getco or gecko get go or gecko get go but she bothered me from the gecko and in my mind I was like it's not what

in my fantasy it didn't live up to that fantasy yeah But can I be honest, like I feel you said, I cannot get over you saying the thing of you walking on the beach with Sarah and someone saying you paid for that. Like that is such a core wound that I feel plays into everything that you're talking about. If people are looking at you your whole life and like you don't deserve a beautiful woman, like that's not for you. I can just see how that would build up in you.

And then you are getting more famous and more successful. Like I just see that all connected as like something that you're like a victim of. Why is it so serious? It's like, it's interesting. People want to talk about, tell me. Do people want to know about it? I don't know. I do.

Esther does. She's not over it. Oh. I don't know what to say. Yeah. You know, honestly, I think I'm done. I think I'm not going to die alone. No.

That's so dumb. I'm being real. Can I make a prediction? No, I'm being real. I think it's fine. How do you feel when you hear him say like? Oh, my God. Was going to die alone?

No. Like when he's like, oh, if I could go back, I would say. like it's not better out there, like all these things he's saying. It's like heavy stuff he's saying. But we talk, right? It's not like I'm hearing this for the first time. I don't just love him. I'm devoted to him still as a friend, as an ex-partner.

I really deeply love him in that way. Do you feel that? It's unhealthy though. How much I love you? No, but I just know that I can call you 24-7 and you'll do things for me. I know. I know that you know that. Like he was in Pittsburgh the other day.

Yeah, like get me a doctor's appointment and she'll just do it. I need souls for my shoes. I don't know. And she'll go by, get me the best kind or, you know what I mean? I know. I am still very much at his back and call. To go to. And she'll make a list of restaurants like if I'm in a city.

I do. Yeah. But that's because. She'll make reservations and everything. But you know I do it with like love and, yeah. It doesn't seem like she's doing it against her will. It's like these are things she's doing because you're family and that's how she treats family. I don't just treat you that way.

I treat all of my family that way. Yeah, I guess you're right. Like you guys are, you do co-parent. like six animals or something right seven seven okay so don't kill one off he's still hanging on one of them is he's gonna talk about that rem he's hanging on he's comfortable right now I don't think so he's not here he is very much here good morning remy it's really bad don't talk about it's gonna make me cry I know I'm just saying it's you know I mean we got we got a we got it you got it you hate when I cry

I don't talk about it because I want to really like legit I'm just saying okay okay all right why are you doing that it's just so funny and sad I mean it's no eyes completely white like like moon eyes yeah yeah completely white cricket spine right shaking you know I'm not shaking I think I'm laughing because she paints a different picture of remi she's delusional I think compared to what you're saying yeah you haven't been around lately yes I he's been at my house I say how to remi all the time And it's just like, I just say, I'm so sorry, buddy. Remy still eats. He loves cuddles.

He knows who I am. I still blow dry him after his shower. Is he suffering? No, he's not suffering. He's on pain medication. He is very comfortable in his bed. And I give him kisses every single day. The worst breath I've ever heard about him.

Yeah. I don't know what that's going on. What age does the breath turn? For small dogs really young. Yeah. Like, small dogs have bad teeth. Yeah. And like different kinds of bad breath.

Yeah. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. And thank goodness, am I right ladies? Am I right gentlemen? We love therapy because we're messed up. And if you're here, no offense, you probably are too. And I know you didn't take offense to that because being messed up is beautiful. And you guys, Valentine's Day is coming up.

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You do? Yeah. And there's in the first season, there's this old man and, you know, he's about the past. And his kids are like sitting there, you know what, you know what I mean, trying to figure out, you know what to do? One doesn't want to. Exactly. Do you remember that? Wait, explain it to me.

I didn't like. He's like, the doctors are like, he's not coming back. Okay. And the daughter's like, we're keeping him on life support. And the son is like, the doctor's basically telling us there's no point. Like, we shouldn't do that. What the fuck are we doing? And they can't, they're fighting.

They're fighting over it. Yeah. And in my mind, I'm like, um, When I'm that age, no one's going to be fighting. Yeah, you're going to have a DNR, right? That's so you. No, I'll be in the hospital, right? And they're like, what do we do with this old Korean man?

Right? And they're like, well, there's nobody around. You know what I mean? Let's just turn it off. But this is like so how your mind works when you see that. But he's sitting there like, my children are fighting over me. No, he doesn't know. I'm a grateful man.

No, like, you know what I mean? Like, he has loved ones, right? For me, it's just going to be like, what, Santino's. Santino's not going to be there. I think you're going to outlive him. Yeah, he's got to call and go, you just turn it off. Jules. It's going to be me, Jules.

I don't think so. I don't know. You don't have faith in Jules. I think Jules. And you also don't think that you will have kids. Based on what I know now, it's, I mean, that's what it is. Certain men I've talked to, they've all explained who have become fathers. They have all explained to me that, like, in their early four,

40s, mid 40s, they're like, I've accepted that this may not happen, but then it still happens. I think your sperm works good still. It's very strong. Yeah. And it's dynamite. And all of them are. All of them are. Yeah, yeah.

That's not possible. No, they're all even. Yeah. You'll swim even. You know what I mean? And fast. In the right direction. Yeah.

In the right direction, too. No one's going backwards. Every time sometimes you'll have one that's dead. You know what I mean? Ooh. But here's the thing. I know a comment. who's, I can't say his name, but he's in the 70s, and he had kids in the 60s.

Whoa. His wife was crazy, and she's like in some sort of institution. So he is raising two now early teen teenagers. And I look at him and I go, oh, man, it must be so hard. But have you asked him, like, how much parenthood has meant to him? If it, you know. No, you can tell it gives him joy. Yeah.

Well, that's enough. Of course. In the 70s, do it alone. It must be hard. But the alternative is also hard. him not having kids to bring to a comedy club is also hard. Like, he has love in his life. We're talking about this, though, based on the pit, why would anybody want to become a nurse or a doctor?

I mean, that shows insane. Yeah. That's what you have to deal with? Because people, like, get off on saving people. They do? Yeah, haven't you ever met someone with, like, a hero complex? Oh, wow. It just seems so stressful.

It's really high stress. Like a spine coming out of an eye, you know what I'm in? And we got to, you know, and people are just running around. What do we do with Spine Eye? When you watch the pit, are you the kind of person that you can just stare and see it all? Or do you have to like cover your eyes? Some of that stuff. And I know it's prosthetics.

I know it's, yeah, but some of it you kind of look around. Like that one foot in the beginning? There's so much bad stuff. Yeah. And season two is rough too. I know Dave. I haven't started season two. Dave has to, he's like, oh, he can't.

You watch that show? I haven't yet. I'm not ready for anything that intense. I want I really soft, happy things. I think you could. Yeah. Yeah. It's a great.

The gore and stuff doesn't bother me. It's more just like it gets my head spinning into like bad territory. I'm easily, I'm very sensitive right now. Like after having a baby, but I think it'll get better. You don't watch anything anymore. I recommend things to you. You don't ever watch anything. When do I have the time to really binge, you know?

Like I don't, I can't. When the little one goes to bed? It's asleep. Why can't you go? Because I nurse to sleep and he sleeps right next to me. You have him the titty. I do. I try with the iPad, but it's.

like at some point you know do you watch things by yourself or do you need someone else there no i watch it by myself yeah yeah yeah i like uh watching you know by myself in my lonesome state on a tv just on an ipad alone in the dark i like that i never watches tv it's always ipad yeah you're an ipad kid i'm i have ipad kid i like it i like just you know huddling up my blankies do you have a snack yeah i have a snack jar now what's in it i have korean candies like chaco chaco Chaco pies. Love a chocolate. I love chocolate.

I love chocolate. I love chocolate. Macha. You know what I'm not into? And I don't know what the fucking hype is about. Dubai chocolate. Everything's Dubai. I'm with you.

It's a scam. It's a scam. Cones. You know what I'm over it. I'm over it. Who cares about Dubai chocolate? I know. It's just pistachio, right?

It's pistachio. I was never even bad hot pistachio die hard. I am so with you on this. I am. What is the hype about? It's a. good. It's good.

But it's like, I don't dream about it. I don't dream about it. It should not be as big as it is. The way that it's taking off is like freaking me out. Like, it doesn't make sense. There's so many. All nutty things have a phase.

We had an almond phase probably one time in like chocolate bars or stuff. Peanut brittle. That was probably a phase. That was a phase. I do still like peanut brittle. But you wouldn't like reach for it if there's a bunch of options.

No. Number one is always going to be mochi. Anything mochi is my weakness. Mochi butter, mochi anything Mochi, just rice, rice, rice, rice, rice. Yeah. You're not, you're weird, you're a little bit on mochi. Yeah, I'm on Mitch Mochi a little bit.

I think nothing is better than, like, if something is based on, like, the smores flavor profile, so chocolate, Graham, and marshmallow will always get me. Did you like Rocky Road ice cream then? No, because I don't like chocolate ice cream as a base. I need vanilla. Wait, smores is half, quarter chocolate. But there's something about chocolate versus chocolate ice cream

where chocolate ice cream, like, I've never had it be right. That's so funny that, that this is the only thing we'll probably really agree on. I hate chocolate ice. He might love chocolate. It's different. It doesn't taste the same. They're not equal in any way.

What's your favorite ice cream flavor then? Let's talk about chocolate for a second. He likes mint. He likes mint. That's like Dave. Like chocolate mint. Do you have like a favorite one? Because Dave can rank them for you.

I'm going to say something right now. Probably controversial. Baskin Robbins. That's what Dave says. It's number one. That's what Dave says too. Chocolate ice cream. Number one.

Second would be Jenny's mint chip. Here's the thing. I don't even have a second. Do you know why? I refuse to try other ones. Dave's a portrayer of Baskin. All right. Why would you even try another one?

Do you like peppermint stick? No. No, no. I'll tell you why. When you go to these fancy places, they make the chocolate too thick, big. Like big chunks of chocolate. Where it's in Baskin-Robbins,

they're like little dots. They look like little dots in the sea of green, you know? Like little Venezuelan poets. Would you ever get multiple scoes? That's a terrible reference. Multiple scoops with a different flavor. Yeah, I do that.

They have to match, though. It has to. You can't just go blind and get three completely opposite. Well, yeah, I'm not going to get sharper with mint chip. Banana split, Baskin-Robbins. I do it all the time, okay? All the time? All the time.

And I'll take one bite of each and throw the rest away. Okay, so here's what it is. Mint chocolate. Okay. Then I'll do Rocky Road. You know what I love? Butter Peacon. I love butter peacon.

Wow, you're a classic man. classic man, dude. You're, and then I'll do a caramel sauce, a chocolate sauce, and a strawberry sauce. And you know what I tell Baskin Robbins is a guy behind the counter or woman, whoever's working there? Right? I go, I don't care where the sauce goes. You could put the caramel over the mint.

You can put the strawberry over the Rocky Rock and Row. Yeah, yeah. Whatever you, your preference, whatever, or whatever you feel, sir, you can do it. And I'll accept it. The artist. But there needs to be two fresh bananas with it, sliced. Well, no, it's one banana slice. Slice.

And number two, you got to put the nuts on there, baby. I'm a 1950s. You're a diner guy. I'm a diner guy. What is your diner order? If you and I go to swingers or DuPars, what's your order? It's always breakfast. I don't care what it is.

What? Yeah. Eggs over hard. Hard? I agree. I agree, too. Ah! Yeah.

Hard? Yeah. Real hard. Oh, I just, I've never. Okay. You know what it is even? Yeah, I know what it is even? Yeah, I know what it.

What is it is? It's hard eggs. How can you not know what over hard means? I don't know. What other options are there? Have you tried it? It would be funny if I didn't know. What's your favorite patty meldellie?

I don't never had one. Yeah. What? I don't like anything about petty melts. Because you know what reminds me of? That Hawaiian thing. What? The loco moco?

Yeah. How is the patty melt equal to locoma? I don't like brown beef. Oh, really? I only like, I'm raising my voice. I'm so sorry. I don't like ground beef. right in a hamburger situation.

When it's outside a hamburger situation, no thank you. What about it in tacos? Wait, but you know that's good. You got me, God. Fuck, that was a good one. Yeah, you're writing a hard shell. Old school like a Taco Bell situation. Okay.

Sour cream, chopped up lettuce. I'm a Taco Bell baby. We too. Ah, are you and I, baby? It's good stuff. May I suggest that you try the patty mel that Casals in Ktown. I love Casals.

I know, but you got to try the patty melt specifically. What is Casals? It's right by my elevated diner. It's right by my Korean spa. Yeah. Is it like a Korean establishment? I don't believe it. I don't think so.

No, it's a, it seems like an old-timey. You know that famous photo of that man sitting in that diner? It's a kind of circular diner. It's from an outside shot looking in. Yeah. Do you know what I'm saying? Yeah. You know what I'm saying?

for some reason? Nighthawks. Hopper. It has that feel. Yes, Cassel's actually does look like this. Really? Yeah. Has that feel. So even their hash brown, everything is just one or two steps up.

It's elevated. Really? How do I not move that? I wish I was white and I could go to a diner like that in the 50s. How was your day, Jimmy? Me too. You know what I mean? How was the factory?

You're like, oh, pretty good, Bill. You know what I mean? I'm going home to the wife. And you go home, right, when your suit, you put your grief brief, his down. Honey, I'm. I'm home, right? You slap her? How was your day?

Right? And I beat the shit out of her. No, no, no. You know, are the kids in bed? Yeah, Sally and Toby is in bed. I'm going to say, good night. And I go in, I kiss them in the forehead. How was your day, Toby?

Pretty good, dad. Right? And you go in there, you read a book in bed with your wife next year, and she's like doing something. I don't know what they do. She has her hair and rollers. And the end rollers. And a full face of makeup.

Yeah. Give me a valium, sweetie. And I take a volume. and they go and they do the day over again That's my dream I want to be in the 50s Yeah yeah yeah But being Asian, Korean

You can't even You can't win internment camp Oh my gosh They do this The barracks You know what I mean Get back in the barracks Yeah

Hey Jap They would say stuff like that Hey Jap We won that war buddy And you're like Oh fuck right And then like The colored fountain

Because we'd have to drink Out of the color fountain You know I mean So it would be a different A human experience Oh I see You don't think so? There's no other era, I think, that I would live in America being a Korean man.

I think 1970s would be my cut up. Anything below that? No, in the 60s, I could do it. Hate Ashbury. I think I could have done some stuff. Hey, do what going on? I think so. You know what I mean?

Having an Asian accent, but kind of be hippie. Oh, my gosh. Look at all the color is. I feel like the 70s would have really like accepted you just fine. Yeah. But before 65. It would be a terrible time for you and I. I could get away.

Yeah, you would date like a Mitch McConnell. I would like a politician. I would find a way. Yeah, you would. Scramble. I feel like you would too. No, there's no way. Being a small little Korean man, before 65, I think it would have been up.

But I feel like you would have been okay being the token. I would have danced for them. You would have danced like a monkey. Yeah, like this. And do a dance. Yeah, it would be bad. I want to go back to your plate. What's on the plate with the hard eggs?

Bacon, avocado. So hash browns. Oversooked too. Well done hash browns. Yeah, well done hash brown. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I also do one pancake. Only one.

Only one pancake. Well, with that kind of meal, you don't need more than one. Exactly. Thank you so much, Esther. Bacon? Sausage. Maybe a side of bacon as well. Yeah.

But this has to don't want. You know what I go, you know, I'm going to say something, okay? What I miss about the old road? I don't know. Because you're rich now. And you go to nights places and before it was Denny's. No, no, no, no. Before when I was through the road.

When I was friends with you, we'd go to Denny's. Yeah, like I would fly in a day early to a city. Then in the morning I would have to do press because the tickets weren't sold. And I would just do like five or six places. And then I would ask whoever was driving me, tell me, take me to the best hometown practice spot. Like I'm not looking for something fancy. I want something like an old school legendary. diner right and then some of my experiences were just i just i just i'll never forget that's so special

like you're in the woods deep in in like the midwest somewhere and then it's just trees and this old little house that's a that's like a breakfast joint do you now fantasize about like your early earlier years yeah you romanticize it in comedy and do you miss that feeling i think he still has that feeling and that's the problem. I think that he still feels like he is that person who's not telling. I think I put myself emotionally in that spot. Yeah. It's like I was hanging out with Theo in Vegas last weekend

and seeing how big he's gotten because I haven't really hung out with him in public in a while. It was literally every other person knew who he was. And in my mind I'm like, I want to stay in the struggle. I like the grinding of it I like But you're not in the struggle You want to be

You want to be You want to be in the grind See that's why But I put myself in that situation I know probably not I kind of like love that he does keep himself there Yeah it's a good It's a good mindset to have as a creative person

For sure Yeah But I do I love it I agree But I do feel like he takes it a little step too far Where it's like Everything becomes about how he's

a failure. But I purposely do that so I could feel the struggle. Yeah. Because what is it like going, I'm great. I have everything. Probably pretty depressing. Yeah. Yeah, I don't want that. I agree. I mean, that's good. Can I say there could be more. Yeah. For everybody. I don't know. I don't know what's going to happen. You know, my mom says something. She doesn't say a lot of profound things, but one thing that she always says that really like sinks into my brain is she's like, I never want to have a life where, I don't have dreams. Like she never wants to be so rich and so successful and so content that like she stops dreaming because she's like dreams are so lovely.

You need it. You need hope. You need something to look forward to. Even if all your needs are met or all your dreams have come true, you need new dreams. You do. Yeah. Like the most depressed I've ever been is when I'm like, I did things that I meant to do and now what? Like you're special.

I understand. New dreams. Yeah. That's what it is. New dreams. What do you think you're new dreams? dreams are. I think maybe that's a part of my depression.

I don't know what it is really right now. I don't know what I want because it's like my agents will go, well, buddy, movies and televisions, TV is coming your way, you know. And it's like, I don't want that. You know, I think I came into this town wanting that and I did some of it, you know. And I'm like, I don't want, like, because I've, I've been doing this last year, I've been still doing smaller movies and like guest throwing on TV shows. And the last one I did, I was sitting in my trailer.

And it was like hours I was sitting there. They don't pay you much. And no one's going to see it. And it's like, what am I doing this for? You know, it doesn't feel as creative, you know? I think when you're shooting in a scene and you're really getting in the, it's fun. But it's like, I don't know if that's a part of my dream anymore. Yeah, it is hard to like,

shift when I because I relate to that too like when we all like packed up our bags and moved to Hollywood like we did have this certain idea and it is hard to let go of that idea even though so much has changed but also there might be something really good and healthy about doing those jobs for you where it's like yeah I am bored and I'm not the king of the castle here like I am you know on my tour like maybe it's good for you I think I'm willing to do what bert and Tom are doing which is just doing their own thing. And it's like, I'll do that. Yeah.

Me and Andrew have a couple of things in the work and stuff like that. But I just, I don't know if I'm necessarily wanting to like, like I have an audition in like four months. The last one I did, I was just like, I sent it in. And then the note was no. I mean, it's not happening. You know what I mean? And in my mind, I was like, I poured everything into this thing.

And it's like, not that I cared that I got rejected, but it's like, why, why am I doing this? Because even if I got it, you know what I mean? Then I'm like, then I got to go, I got to go to Canada or whatever for a month. Yeah. I'm going to do two episodes of tires coming up. That I'll do because it's like. Your friends.

And it's called. And then also they're my friends. Yeah. And it wasn't, I didn't have to beg for it. There's another project I just did that was pretty high elevated. It was like a couple of lines. Yeah. It was a pretty big deal.

And I did that because the star of the show, I signed an end. so I can't talk about it, but he's huge, and he's a legend. I have to do it. Yeah. So I'll do those. But again, they call and they go, do you want to do it, you know, but I don't know if I want to. So I don't know what my dream is right now. You know, here's what I'm doing.

I'm waking up. I'm doing whatever is in front of me. Hell yeah. You know, we lost a legend today, Catherine. Oh, my God. This one really hit me hard. It's hit me hard, too. I'm shocked.

She was so young. She was so good on the studio. Last year. Yeah, she just did the studio. She's good in every single thing she's ever done. Of course. The one thing that like consistently makes me laugh when I'm having a bad day is the scene of her in Best and Show of her. That's final scene of her walking the dog with the ankles.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And she's doing that little. Yeah. The ankle thing. If I'm having the bad day, nothing picks me up than better than that specific scene. And how many times have we watched that movie? I still watch it. I know.

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That's J-O-I-N-B-B-I-T-T-com slash Trash Tuesday. And make sure to use our URL so they know that we sent you. Home Chef is rated number one by users of other meal kits for quality, convenience, value, taste, and recipe ease. As the New Year kicks off, which for me, I love a grace period. Okay, New Year's is like January and half of February. I need to simplify everything. And that especially means dinner because dinner, why is it always stressful? Why is it always like no one can decide what to do?

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Go to HomeC Chef.com slash Trash Tuesday. That's HomeCheft.com slash Trash Tuesday for 50% off your first box and free dessert for life. Homecheft.com slash Trash Tuesday. And you must be an active subscriber to receive free dessert. You explain to me this banana thing. Thank you. I love bananas. Panas is the best.

And how many, you know, you've lived with me for a decade. There's always, what, two things, coconut water and banana in the house. Yeah. And I do that because it's good for the heart. And it's good for your mind and your body and it's fuel. Do you see that Christian explaining the banana is why God exists? Have you seen that?

No. Look how genius God is. The banana. You can easily hold it in your hand. It's peelable, right? Wait, this is propaganda that would have worked on me. And like, it's not, yeah, it doesn't. kind of cool. Yeah, that makes sense.

When you look at nature and symmetry. This is a God's design. It's perfect, which is for the banana is, but they explain the pomegranate. You know what I mean? It's like only see, you know, we got to pry it open. I can explain the pomegranate because it's like. Okay, explain it. Okay.

Taking time to break, to cut it open, carefully remove all the seeds annoyingly, that's like a meditative process that's good for the human brain. So you think God designed it like that? I think that God designed it not for humans. I think God designed it for proliferation of, like, other trees. Because with that many seeds and birds getting into them and then dispersing it. Okay, let's talk about every fruit then. Because every fruit is not, I was like this, every single fruit.

Every fruit is not meant to be eaten. The coconut. Okay. Is that a fruit? It's a tree nut. It's a tree nut? Yeah, I'm pretty sure it's a nut. I don't think it's a fruit.

It's not a tree nut. I'm still going fruit, but I think you might be right. It's a nut. Uh-oh. Controversial answer. What is it? A droop. A droop. A droop.

Imagine someone called you a droop. It's a droop? That's an actual thing? I've never heard of that. It's a type of fruit, not a true nut. But it was legally classified as a tree nut by the FDA. So I have the white man's view. Okay. It's a nut.

Okay, let's call it a fruit. What about strawberries versus blueberries? Oh, blueberry. Blueberry. Blueberry guy. Better for you, I think. It is better for you. Yeah.

But a good strawberry. But when they're bad? I know. That's the thing with fruit. It's so inconsistent. But strawberry ice cream is one of my top five. I would never do a fruit ice cream. That is a crazy choice when you could be doing vanilla's and chocolate.

Fruit all for me. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. What is going to get, you're outrageous and out of control? Why? You don't like fruit ice creams? No, but why would I do my fruit when I could just do my fruit as like a snack and then do my dessert as like cookie dough ice cream? Doesn't not as, not for me. I would, I would pick a...

What did you eat a cookie? Good point. Eat a fucking cookie then Or eat just cookie dough Why does it have to be an ice cream format? Well that's just to me It changes the element Yeah

One element changes whatever it initially was And to me it's just We're wasting a healthy treat We're wasting our indulgent moment On something that like It's just like a healthy thing Strawberry ice cream isn't healthy Yeah we've accepted that

Yeah it's got cream, sugar You know what I mean It's I don't even know if there's real strawberries In strawberry ice cream Like the flavor There doesn't need to be The flavor profile of strawberries, I can have that at breakfast with my yogurt. And it's like, oh, that was like a healthy meal.

I'm not going to have a chocolate chip cookie for breakfast and be like, oh, that was like a healthy meal. No, I'm going to indulge when I'm indulging. I'm going to go all the way. I'm going to get the brownie Oreo earthquake Sunday from Dairy Queen. I'm not going to get like a fruit Sunday. What about like a strawberry shortcake with little breadcrumbs in it? Ooh, nice.

You're deceiving your own mind. All right. And you're arguing a point that you can't be argued. That's not true. Yeah, yeah. How do you not at least see what I'm saying a little? Because the proof is in the pudding, right? You go to Baskin Robbins.

Like a lot of, there's a lot of fruits in the game. Yeah. And I'm just saying I think that's a waste. You got mango. Strawberry. Yeah, but like white people ice cream, mango ice cream is really bad. You got to go like magnolia. You know what?

The proof is in the pudding. Okay. Because when you go to Baskin Robbins, what are the three flavors you get? Mint chip, butter, piquon, Rocky Road. I don't see a fruit insight. I see chocolates. I see pecans. I see.

Look at me right now. Banana split. In your face. You're adding that. It's in the name, guy. There's got to be fruit in there, guy. There's got to be fruit in there. Yeah.

And I also said strawberry pouring, the sauce. That sounds honestly like way too much going on. I don't want to say it earlier. Because you don't have the kind of senses I have, guy, right? There's a lot going on in my tongue senses. Right? I can process 50 different flavors at one time. You're too desensitized.

What do you mean? You're a purist. Your tongue needs like 80 different like flavor profiles to feel something. Because he smokes. Because I smoke cigarette. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I'm trying to keep my tongue like it just needs like a couple things at a time. Yeah, yeah.

You're a simple person. You're not complex. Like, do you ever go to wanderlust? I love Wanderlust. Yeah. Oh my God. That's a fun. That's a fun.

You would hate it, but you would hit Wonderland. I don't love Wanderlust. It's never going to be my first choice. My first choice is a place where you can get a vanilla soft serve cone dipped in chocolate. Go to McDonald. Dairy Queen, of course. Yeah. What do you think of that?

You belong in the 50s. Yeah. I think you're a basic bitch. And I'm sorry for saying that to get my friend. I'm not offended. I stand firm in my beliefs. I think that Wonderless has just a lot of like Asian flavors is why. We like it because it has all of the hits.

It has like the Korean stuff. It has the Vietnamese. Okay, what, what, what, what? What's your problem? My problem? No, no, no. It's fine. I just, the argument, it's like sweet things are sweet and delicious.

And they can be so simple and it can be just as good as all these crazy things that you guys are doing. Yeah, but the vanilla thing doesn't thrill me. Nothing like there's not like a molecule in my body that goes, woo wee. You know what I mean? There's like, it's so plain. I understand it. It's delicious. and I can have it, but it's not like, wow, I'll, you know, I'm thinking about this.

I think I need a little bit more. Okay, I have another question. Is it ice cream oriented? No, but it is food oriented. It's about burgers. Do you feel like a burger is like pretty much good everywhere, right? No, absolutely not. That's the craziest thing I've ever heard.

How can you get a cheeseburger in it not just be like? There's so many factors that you're not. The bun has to be not stale. soft, but here's another thing, can hold the pressure of the actual patty and the stuff that's in the middle. I would argue that if it's capable of holding the pressure, then it's too much bread. All right, so you want it to fall apart? Well, I'd rather that than be like eating just bread and barely tasting the meat. You're just being argumentative, I think. I'm just... Here's what I like. You asked me. Okay. Okay. You asked me. Okay. Okay. The bun, right?

Lightly buttered. It has to be, you know what I mean? Buttered. on both sides. You're so obsessed with bread being buttered. I like thin patties. Smashed or just thin? Smashed? I'm fine with it. A cheese, right?

Thinly sliced regular onions. Not a lot of lettuce. Like the thinnest of tomato slices, right? And then sometimes I'll do a little round of Tabasca a little bit inside the... Pickles? Pickles too, yeah, yeah. But not every place does that.

McDonald's doesn't have that. No, but you're telling me a McDonald's cheeseburger isn't delicious? Yeah, that's why. God. I wanted to punch you in the face so bad just now. That was, oh my God. You invoked something in me. I would never hurt you.

I would never hurt you, okay? I would never physically assault you. That was fucking, wow. Smug. It was smug, gross. Okay? It was just like. You've never had a Big Mac, a whopper?

No, no, no, stop. Stop. This is amazing. You work with her? It's just my opinion. I think that, like, would I rather have a high-ho burger versus a McDonald's? Wouldn't you? Yeah.

Yes. Yeah. I'm not impressed when a restaurant is, like, amazing at a burger. I'm more impressed when a restaurant, like, shows up with, like, oh, my God, these carrots and these Brussels sprouts are so delicious. Like, that to me is hard to do. Like, okay, do you guys like Hillstone? Yeah, of course. Do you?

Houston's? Houston's, to me, is like a Morton. Morton's is so boo. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Anytime someone tells me to go to Morton's for their steak, I'm like, what is happening? Do we not live in L.A. with choices? Okay.

That's insane what you said. What's your favorite steak place? I'm a big boa guy because they have the snow, the snow beef. What's that? Certain type of cow. Yeah, it's a certain type of cow. It's from Hokkaido. Yes, from Haikido, right?

And I'm telling you right now that meat is like butter. It melts right in your mouth. But here's the thing. My argument is like, is it really hard. It's hard to fuck up Wagyu. I've bought Wagyu for the house. And it's tasted exactly like Boa. It's not like this.

Yeah, because I have. It's not. Can I tell you? No, I have a Wagyu dealer in, in Hawaii. Oh, you know what? I'm leaving. I do. I do.

I do. I do. Oh my God. That's pretentious piece of shit. It is pretentious. But I do. have a guy who sells it from his car and he specifically, I said, what do you have? A caviar dealer and a wagu dealer.

Yes, and he sells caviar too and he was and he texts me and he says, hey, here's what I have. I'm sorry, we're not cool. We don't know any, you know any wagu dealers. But it's to your argument. To your argument. What's his name. Actually, I don't know. Exactly, you lied.

He's a Korean guy. What a line bastard. Oh my god. I'll tell you right now. It's called meetluxhawai.com. He has the best wagu and he drives to you and delivers it and he tells you exactly what's imported what's coming in what's not tell me i don't have a fucking wagyu dealer okay what that's the text between me and my wagyu dealer and i picked it up from the back of his car his name's emerson

great thank you we'll get back to you shortly and put in an order do you have by chance any caviar exactly that's what it says here okay right so yeah when did you need it by i can only bring it in smaller portions like one ounce at the moment not large tins i can see if i can add it to my next on the 20th. It's Japanese white sturgeon caviar from Miyazaki. How much does that run you? It's too much.

How does that sound? Look at the kind of life she's living right now. This is insane. I know. Tomorrow, unfortunately, but I'll order for the 20th as well. Oh, so she's ordering two. How much is that? It's a lot.

It's a lot, but it was for a big Christmas party. Give me a price. It's in the hundreds. If we're a small little tin. I'm tired of hot girls, man. Are you going to start dating what? No. Hot girls? You're obsessed with hot girls.

You're on TikTok. I don't know who needs to hear this. No one. No one needs to hear this because you, I don't care what you think. Stick around and you hear what they have to say. No, I don't. Here's another thing on TikTok where I just super swipe. Once I see it, the slow art reveal. Oh, yes. I have seen those. And I go, fuck off. Short right then. You have to wait 30 seconds for you to turn it around. Yeah. It's never good. Never have they turned around

Oh, that's a masterpiece No, I can do that No, no, do it quickly What do you like when you see on TikTok? What do you stick around for? My algorithm is fucking weird. Yeah. There's this teacher's award.

I don't know why it's in my algorithm But it's like, this year's 2024, Milken Award goes to Frank Hofstadter from Springfield High School. And they're in the audience They're like, me, right? And then, you know,

they get $25,000 check. And all the kids clap, right? And he's just super proud. And in my mind, I'm thinking like, he's a great teacher. I think his algorithm would shock you. I'm shocked. Not that they're weird. It's actually wholesome and moving.

He likes watching things that make him cry. Yeah, I love milk and award. He likes like reunions of long lost sisters or long lost family members. He likes when, oh, military coming home to their children. Yeah, it's called Hope Corps. Hope Corps. I love Hope Corps videos. But then I also have ones that you don't even know about,

which is like people's dying moment, last dying moment. Yeah, some of the shit that you send me pisses me the fuck off. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. What is that? Like there's some videos, I don't know if they're real or not, but it's like, you know, a doctor telling, a doctor telling parents that their daughter was in a car accident. Oh, no, yeah.

That's crazy. What the fuck? No. And their reaction, and I'll react with them. I'll go, you know what I mean and I'll kind of cry with them you know he has also this tragedy porn addiction yeah it's tragedy porn so like if there's like a Korean fairy with X amount of people that died yeah yeah yeah yeah go down a rabbit hole and like feed me more and more like horrible tidbits

that I didn't want to hear over a span of a week I'm looking fun I do want to go back to food for a second okay good let's go back to something normal you can tell I'm very pregnant and hungry this episode this is it eight months I'm but yeah you After you're done with this one, you're going to have more? I really want three to four children. Why? But Dave said we're stopping it too, and I can't do pregnancy again. It's too hard.

It's too hard on your life. Yeah. And you're done? Yeah, I think so. Yeah. I don't know if she is. I think so. My face isn't even healed.

You already know. It's like this has been hard, a hard transition for me. It's unbelievable because I knew both of you without babies. Yeah. I'm the same, though. There's a little change. You're a gutter at one point. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, you were. I know. Late nights. You were there with Tony. You were there too because you were also in the gutter. You eat his butt hole. I didn't eat his butthole. He ate my butthole.

Remember this right. Imagine Tony Hinchcliffe eating her butthole. You walked in on us once. I think so, yeah. Oh, wow. Yeah, in the comedy store office. You walked in on something. Yeah, yeah.

And something that's burned into my psyche. Yeah, it's weird. Life goes on. People change. Well, I think because for girls, we know how really it gets for us where the clock, the window will close. And I think that's why.

Yeah, I mean, I don't like the fact that it closes. Yeah. I mean a mistake. I agree. You should be able to be 60 and still have babies. I agree. What's menopause all about? We'll find out.

I feel like I'm probably not far. No. Right. What is it, though? Is it you lose? What do you lose? lose with menopause? Estrogen.

Extrogen. Yeah. To use the hormone. Can you inject estrogen? Yeah. So basically that's a whole big thing now where we've been scaring women for decades about hormone support when they enter menopause. And so these women, they're called the forgotten generation.

We've had, because a lot of things are available to men, right? You guys can get your tea, your testosterone. And if a man has a problem, there's a solution always. But with women, they've largely been left behind and said, But if you use these things to make you feel better in menopause, it will cause you cancer. And they're now saying, that was a lie. It's a fucking blatant lie. And we lost all these women to horrible symptoms of menopause.

I know you don't need to know this. I do. I do. Like every woman that I know, basically that has gone through menopause, like, because you lose your estrogen, like, it is true. Like, you'll get dry down there. But then all you have to do is everyone uses this estrogen cream. Good as new. Yeah, but what, but do you lose sexual thoughts when you're on menopause?

I think you can. I think like everybody's probably has a different experience with menopause, but I can imagine like I don't, you know, even in postpartum, like, it's hard for me to think about sex. Yeah, I've already, I've already lost. Right. Wait, you guys don't think about it? It comes and goes. Yeah, it comes and goes. It comes in waves.

Like right now, I'm not thinking about. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Do you think about it all the time? Oh, yeah. Really? And your dick still works like all the time really good.

or do you need support? Yeah. It's unbelievable. Like, you know, I see older comics. I can see David Spade, right? And we talk about, you know, are you still? Like, yeah. We do.

It's incredible. But even older dudes, I go, like, you still? I am good. You know what I mean? Do you still have feeling? Yeah, sure, but, you know? And it's like, incredible. I think you lose it at 75.

I'm unfortunately able to report that you don't. Oh, yeah. I don't think you necessarily lose it at 75. I think some... The average, though. I googled it. My parents are still going. Men typically experience a gradual decline in sex-derived libido between ages of 60 and 70.

The only thing I know, my aunt who's 95, she has a boyfriend who's also 95, and they just hold hands in bed. They don't fall. No. Yeah, yeah. They couldn't. They could not. Their hips, I think. I do think that if you stay healthy, you should be fine for a long time.

Even if it went away. I'd be fine with it. Yeah. Because it's like every waking moment you think about it. It's always there. What about when you're sitting here with us? Never. No, because I took my riddle in, so I'm kind of very focused.

Well, I guess it's time to say goodbye. I never know if Bobby likes me or not. Ow, that's my, ow, Bobby. Oh my God, I'm so sorry, Esther. That really fucking hurt. I'm sorry. Why did you say sorry to me? Because we're interrupting.

you. Oh, I don't care. I'm sorry. Thank you so much to our guest, Bobby Lee. He is my best friend, and he is Kalila's ex-boyfriend. My ex-lover. And we'll see you next week with a brand new episode.