Trash Tuesday w/ Esther Povitsky & Khalyla Kuhn - Jared Freid Knows Why You’re Still Single

Episode Date: September 8, 2026

BTS, BONUS CONTENT AND MORE! Only on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/c/TrashTuesdayPodcast    Jared Freid is on the pod this week, and he’s got dating advice for ALL of us. Luke Binkow gets open about not being able to commit, we conduct a deep dive into Bobby’s relationship patterns, and play Red Flag, Green Flag! Jared and the girls provide important dating insight for all the singles, AND the not singles! Watch Jared's NEW SPECIAL "Jared Freid: The Family Plan" RIGHT NOW ON NETFLIXMORE JARED!!https://jaredfreid.com/ https://www.instagram.com/jaredfreid/?hl=en https://www.netflix.com/title/82672875 https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/Walking-Red-Flag/Jared-Freid/9781668061800 MORE LUKE!https://www.instagram.com/luke.binkow/?hl=en   Thank you to our sponsors:Thank you to SKIMS -  Shop Everyday Cotton, and all of my favorite bras and underwear at http://www.skims.com/trashtuesday    #skimspartnerThank you to ASPCA PET INSURANCE - https://www.aspcapetinsurance.com/TRASHTUESDAY   The ASPCA® is not an insurer and is not engaged in the business of insurance. For terms and conditions visit: https://www.aspcapetinsurance.com/more-info/state-documents-and-sample-policies/. Products are underwritten by either Independence American Insurance Company (NAIC #26581), or United States Fire Insurance Company (NAIC #21113) and distributed by PTZ Insurance Agency Ltd. *Ebb Ocean Club is NOW IN SEPHORA* https://www.sephora.com/brand/ebb-ocean-club for Khalyla’s reef safe and biodegradable hair products!*Listen to Esther's New Solo Pod!* https://www.esthersgrouptherapy.substack.com FOLLOW TRASH ON SOCIALS: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/itstrashtuesday Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@itstrashtuesday MORE ESTHER:TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@esthermonster Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/esthermonster/ MORE KHALYLA:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/khalamityk/ Tigerbelly Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/@UCIyIoM_Nd8HtY19fuR_ov2A   PRODUCTION:Studio Ten42: https://www.instagram.com/studioten42/ Guy Robinson: https://www.instagram.com/grobfps/ Arielle Jade (Editor): https://www.instagram.com/jade.rabbit.cce/ Elisa Hernandez Kohler: https://www.instagram.com/ellie.lianna/ Megan Clements:  https://www.instagram.com/egggymeg/   See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Men with flip flops and jeans in Arizona. Like women in Arizona, the worst thing you could ever describe to them. They had such an association with douchebag and men and jeans with flip flops. I think that's such a sick look. I'm sorry, that's so dope. Hello to my most important favorite community, the slugs. I'm very excited to share with you guys that the movie that I, co-wrote and starred in Direc Store June is now free on YouTube and I would love it if the slugs could go in and comment

like it honestly the movie is doing so well on YouTube I'm so happy and appreciative that we finally found our audience of horses here on YouTube I've heard from so many people that and I do take this as a compliment they're like it's a comfort movie that they play in the background because it is such a vibe the music the dialogue all the weird guest stars you're going to see that you I'm just really proud of it. It took a lot to get that movie made and so I would love it if you guys would check it out. That's all. Say bye, Bernie.

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in the drop-down menu that follows. Author of the new book Walking Red Flag. That's right. I'm an author. Respect me as such. Is this your first book? Yeah. I think it's my first and only book. Okay, that's amazing. Welcome, Jared Freed. Thank you for having me. Thank you. New York comedy staple. that's right fixture and then we have our returning champion Luke

what's your last name again uh binko okay the binks oh the binks is cute he works at the comedy store he parked my car last weekend it was really nice

I liked that it was you what is the inside of her car do you judge people by the inside of their car no but I will say with your car and it's not going to be bad but you parked your car and I didn't know whose car it was

because I wasn't there and I was like fuck like who's fucking car is this Like I have to figure out because you don't really want to like you know there's no way to figure it out you don't really want to prove that you don't know whose car it is sometimes random people parking there and there was so much paperwork out that I just saw that it was like oh sag esther she is paperwork she is paperwork girl and I was like it was just like your name on like a huge letter but thing and I'm okay well that was easy I've never yeah so you just go to the bank and cash some check my car is my home office my restaurant my car is really messy. So I'm glad no one parks. That's so funny. So welcome back to our show, everyone. Your husband, we are from the same town, I think.

You're from Needham? Yes, we've had this conversation. Yes, I'm sorry. This is how I, like, reference you in general. Like, because when we first met years and years ago, you're like, Needham? Like, you, we brought, somehow my hometown came up. I remember. No, I remember.

And you're like, that's where, like, my guy's from. Yeah. I think you guys were recently dating. Yeah, I can't leave you're from there. And so I know what you... He's older. He's much older, yeah. Much.

He was my teacher. I know what you're going to say, which is that he's from Boston. He's a Celtics fan. Why would he name his son Bernard King? That's why I'm even bringing this up. So Bernard is a family name. It's his grandfather's name. And King just happens to be his last name.

Thank God. As a lifelong Pavitsky, I fucking deserve that. What a great name. Love Bernie King. Yeah. I love that older names are coming back. I love the round. All names are cyclical, you know,

but I like the round of names that are coming around for our age group. Like someone said their kids name Rose. I was like all the... Rose is a popular one now. It is a very popular one. But at the pediatrician's office the other day, there was a newborn,

and the little girl's name was Hilda. And I was like, that is so cute. A little witch. That's amazing. They totally outdid me. That's so good. I was like, you guys did it right. All the Golden Girls' names are coming back.

Yeah. What are they? Well, Sophia. Ruth. Ruth. Well, my brother's name is Harry and his wife's name's Ruth. Harry and Ruthie. They sound like an 80-year-old couple,

but those names would be back today. They live in the Chicago area in Morton Grove. Okay, neighbors with Skokie. When do you think the Linda's will swing back around? This is what I was actually thinking. Like, names also go extinct. Yes, they do. Because Linda's a very 80s name, right?

Or Pamela. Or Pam or Jessica. Karen's done. I was going to say Karen. Yeah. My mom's name is Karen. I think she's the last of her kind. You can't even introduce yourself as Karen anymore.

She doesn't use her name at Starbucks or anything. What is she's silly? My sister's name is Chase. She says Chase. She doesn't ever say Karen. She also has three friends and they're all named Karen. That is Luke. And she's from Chicago.

Your mom, how old is your mom? I'd rather not say. No, I'm kidding. She's like 60 something. I don't know. But I'm saying for that generation to take the note, like that's how bad it got Yes, yeah. Like, they take the note on nothing.

Your mom is like, I better change. Like, your mom making changes in her life in her 60s? Yes. Wild. 100%. That's how bad it got. Wait, I love your sister's name, Chase. Chase, yeah.

A lot of people say it's a boy's name, but me, I grew up with a sister name and I never would consider that a boys name. Chase is a hot girl's name. Yeah. Like a hot high school. Like, oh my God, Chase. Boys names on girls. Like, that's like cool girl in a coming of age movie.

That's what I'm going for. I name my daughter. Ace. So, wait, that's why I like Chase. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So obvious. Yeah.

Yeah. Are you single? I'm in a relationship. You are? Yeah. How long have you been in a relationship? Since I would say six months, seven months. She's gonna move in with me.

Whoa. We dated three years ago. And then I ended it. I wasn't ready to be in, like it was either move forward and we're together or end it now. it now. Was it a devastating breakup or was it like, okay, I get like, we are, I think we were at, we were at like a moment where I was like, we need to like, what are we doing here? Yeah. What were you doing? I was dating. I was also just concentrating on other things, you know. Were you a walking red flag? I was the walking red flag. Well, that's why I wrote the

book. You know, I think every guy is a red flag at some point to someone. You know, everyone, every person has red flags. When people think, well, my husband's not a red flag or say stuff like that, you're really setting up the dating scene to be like a miserable place because it's either your husband's a saint and everyone else that's single is a loser,

garbage, or we're all a little bit, not that, you know, not perfect. You're saying that like if someone says, like, I found the best guy, you're just, like, diminishing. Like, explain it more. I think they're lying. I think, like, well, I think they're,

not acknowledging that that guy that they found is right is the best guy for them. And they're finding them at the right time and the right moment. And I think whenever I've ended something with women, even my ex, it wasn't, let me go out and look for better. You know, it just wasn't, I wasn't ready for the responsibility of a relationship. And I was saying the, you know, the respectful thing was to go, I'm going to risk losing you so that I can be a better partner for whoever that's going to be. And that's like a really nice way of putting it.

but I think that's what a lot of the guy side of things get spoken for by women a lot of times So were you in a situation where basically you were given an ultimatum? No, I gave myself. I was like, it's time. It's time to make a decision. What are we doing here? And you're like, I'm just not sure.

And if I'm not sure, then I must end it because I'm being like disrespectful. And then what made you guys get back together? So then I'm like writing this book. It's two years of like, you know, trying to go through these stories of dating and the book takes you from getting dumped to getting dumped.

So it's like all the thoughts I had in my head of like first date, second day. You know, I have personal stories for everything along the way. And then when I was going through these stories, she would come up a lot of like reflections. And we just didn't talk. We, you know, because I was staying away because I didn't want to like be rude.

And it would hurt for me to talk to her. And then, you know, she kept her distance. And I would see her watch my stories and have a lot of feelings come up from that. She posted on Instagram like now two years and two and a half years later. And I went on my podcast and I was like, hey, have you ever like seen an ex post something?

You know, I like brought it up. And you're looking for the new boyfriend and wondering what. And I said it like knowing people listen to the show. You know, anything we say here, we know it gets listened to. Right. She had a friend come to her and be like,

hey, I think he was talking about you. I saw you posted the other. And so then she ended up reaching out to me when I was in town. He sent it. It was like a message in a bottle. Yeah. And then she was like, let's get coffee. So I had my show on Friday.

And then on Saturday morning, I was like, yeah, let's go on Saturday morning. We didn't. Now, had she not initiated that? I don't know, because I got the text and I literally, it wasn't like, and this is kind of like, the advice of the book is like, send the text, like, which is hard to take than it is to give, you know? So I got her text and I literally said, oh, fuck. Like now I have to do something because over the two years, I kept making deals with myself. Well, if I take a month off of drinking and stop thinking about her, then I'll know it was the drinking or if I, that's just my,

line is blown. I'm like if I had just, you know, if I get to the fall and I'm still, and I'm still getting annoyed by seeing her face. Like, what do I do? You know, so. I'm getting so physically uncomfortable. This is crazy. Why, why are you putting yourself through all these tests? Why wouldn't you just reach out if you're thinking about her so much? It wasn't so much. It was just like, kind of like, like flushes a little bit. A little bit. You know, and then you're like, because you doubt yourself, you know, like I think, especially when you end something. and I'm 41, maybe at 20, you know, when someone says, oh, my ex keeps coming back,

like that's them being weak. The ex coming back is them being immature. It's not them trying to mess with you and trying to dangle their love above. It can come off that way, but it's a weakness. Like I, at 41, I have 40, I, Jared, don't, you know, don't text someone that you don't know what you wanna do with this.

Don't, you know, don't bring. But I also feel like that is like the considerate move though, because unless there is intention behind that text to really sort of like, you know, get together and really chat about things. Like, don't send the text otherwise because I do think that a lot of, not all guys, but a lot of guys are very inconsiderate in that sense where it's like they just need to know that they still have somewhat some power over that person. And it's a very, it's an ego boost for them. And they go in and out. They go in and out. I've been that guy. So like I have been inconsiderate is like the best word for it. because it's like, you know, the power thing, I've never thought to myself when I've gone back to someone,

let me see if I have this power over them. That's not the way I've thought about it, even though it can come off that way. You have, again, moment of weakness where you go back to that person, then you go, uh-oh, I'm in this now. And I'm not sure. And I'm not sure again.

And that was really the thing I was really fearful of is like having that swish around in my stomach and going, oh, I've really fucked around with somebody. I come from a more positive place than maybe most, I don't think people want to, like, fuck with someone. Luke, hearing all of this as a young 20s, what do you think about what it's like to be an adult? Sounds a little rough.

I thought it would get better. I'm in a relationship, yes. She's great. Almost two years. Great. And you don't have to think about these kinds of things, right? Like, consideration and stuff? Consideration, like, of what?

Sorry. Do you think about the future? I don't really love to think about the future just because I feel like it kind of like trips you up sometimes like I'm thinking like we've had like discussions about like kids and stuff and like what we think about that but it's also like why deal

she's more of the like talking about kids or whatever future and I'm kind of like look man like what are we having for lunch he's literally like it's like I brought a 25 you know a 20 zero old version of any man. You know what I mean? Like he's not saying things that are surprising me.

Like her bringing it up, him being like what's for lunch? Like that's like the story of every, you know, and then let's say Luke and his girlfriend, they're not going to break up. I'm sure they'll live on forever. You guys are in love. I'll just say one thing. If you fumble that girl, truly, what a fucking mistake. He's so young.

He's going to fumble. He's going to fumble. No, no, have you seen her? Not going to fumble. He's so young. so fucking cool. And that's what I was like, Luke. Yeah, she's great.

If you fumble that, like, yeah, but I don't agree with that. I hear what you're saying. Yeah. Everything you're saying is true about her. She's cool and beautiful. Yeah. But no cool and beautiful

overtakes Luke's fear of being a successful man. Or the fact that he's 25. I think the thing that's the hardest, honestly, that I've dealt with with a lot of relationships, whether it's a romantic one or even just like friendships and stuff, is just the juggling of wanting to be a comedian and like knowing what you want your career to be, it doesn't have to be comedy

and constantly like this dread of anytime I'm doing something that doesn't feel like it's progressing my career, I feel like I'm like wasting my life and I'm like, what am I doing? This is literally, play this when you break up with a girl. No, that is. This is going to be what he says to the girlfriend.

But I'm not so, no, I'm not to be the ghost of Christmas future. But I, I'm, listen, if Luke got married to this woman and listen, again, Like, she's, I'm sure she's everything you say. Like, there is no doubt in my mind. But I'm hearing Luke, how old are you? 25. 25.

How long have you been doing comedy? Four years. Four years. He decided at 21 to make this his literal, all of us know, his religion. You know, comedy is who we are as people. The embarrassment, especially like, I would say as like a man, like the social and the what makes you kind of have value in society, you know. And again, these are societal things that I can't fix.

But like he's gonna have this moment where he's gonna have to say, do I wanna make comedy and the relationship my responsibility? Or do I wanna continue to make comedy the responsibility? And I'll believe in myself enough to think that maybe whoever I end up with when it can happen will be just as one, for me as the person I'm with now.

I'm okay so a lot is coming up yeah a lot a lot don't stress yourself out I'm lucky because my girlfriend's very supportive and we've had like a lot of serious discussions also where I've been pretty clear about like comedy being like my top priority but I think a huge issue though is that you know there's like so much guilt of like you know you'll be out to dinner with your girlfriend and you get a text like hey I'm doing a show you want to come pop in and do time on my show and it's like do I stand up and be like you have to get the bill I'm leaving like super. like I'm out of here.

Luke, let me give you some advice. Don't compare it to Superman. I think you're working this out. It's like you're a superman or Batman or it's loser man. You're kind of saying something that I believe to be true for a lot of men, which is they don't necessarily choose the right woman. They choose the right time. Yeah.

It seems as though you're saying like at 25, especially when you have this big dream you're chasing, you're putting everything on the line and that is like, you know, that's top of mind at all times that you cannot water a relationship properly until you're at a steady point in your career you have to have really a partnership not to say it can't happen i you know listen i wouldn't demean my own relationship to say it was only timing you know i hear what you're saying and i think it's a mix of everything like i think relationships it's a mix of logical and romantic like you have to have both everything luke's just said about the dinner and getting up i have felt that a thousand and one I have too.

Right. If it's not moving my career forward, I can't rest. Like, that was me, my whole 20s too. Like, I'm, like, getting trauma from hearing you say that. Okay, I think what makes me a little bit triggered is that, like, I will ride for a man and still water their relationship. Like, I am a multitasker. I think that I can do both, and I have done both, like, my whole life, even at a young age where it's like, I don't feel like I have to choose one or the other where it's like I can be a good. where it's like, I can be a good partner to you

and still get out there and chase my dreams. And using a career to kind of be like, I just don't have time for this is I feel like a cop out. I think the way. Esther, no. I really don't know what I'm, because I hear you and I think that is, it sounds true.

But I'm also like, I so identify with them. Yeah. But I also know that. You're right, because I don't know the, like, I truly don't know the trenches of early comic life. But that's said as a female, like, I could definitely be on the grind and also be in a relationship. You know, the people that, like, come to me for dating advice.

A lot of it socially, like, their parents, the questions they get are questions I don't get. Well, you know, are you seeing someone? And, like, the embarrassment of, like, having a relationship end. And the way they take it feels like a very, like, what they're dealing with on a social level. Like, when I go home for the holidays, It's not who are you seeing. Yeah. You know, as much seemingly.

The societal thing of Luke not making it. You'll make it. No, but that is, there's more, I know where you're going. I'm saying he's getting pressure on that. Yeah. In the way I think women are getting pressure on who are you seeing? When are you going to have kids? When are you going to get married?

Yeah. I can see that from the female side. I think it's harder because it's not as romantic from the male side. Like you're talking about a job. You know, I can understand where it's like, where it comes off as a cop-out. That's what I always go back to what Bobby says when he talks about his early 20s as a comic and not really getting mad TV into his 30s, right?

And he was like, if I couldn't afford it, like if I couldn't afford a meal in front of me, I couldn't afford a date, I just opted to not have a girlfriend. Like he had this whole idea. It's like he's very traditional. It's like if I cannot be an active provider or enhance her life, I'm not going to get into any relationship because I just cannot afford a relationship. Okay, that sounds like, oh, it's so sweet, but it's actually like a really huge to me, a red flag of like low self-worth.

Possibly. Because you shouldn't have to like, I get it. Like in society we want to be like, you have to be able to provide. But it's like, no, like everyone deserves to find someone. And like that to me sounds like he had low self-worth and he didn't deserve to feel that way. Right. Well, I mean, I'm with you. You're right about the low self-worth.

self-worth thing, but I also think that's like, that's what it is. You know, like, he's not even, like, from Bobby, like, I hear that and I'm like, totally get that. Yeah. And from Bobby, he's not even asking the woman to be a provider. Like, no woman's asking for that, too. Yeah. Like, that's why you get so many times when I've ended things or I've been with someone

or I've heard from women that, like, write in the podcast, he ended it. I said, I'm not even looking to be married. I'm not even looking for the next step. But that's why I'm always like, men are more emotionally. intelligent than they get credit for because we know the next step is coming. We know that a next step has to happen. Like, Luke 25, like, that's okay. But if it's 30, his girlfriend, who's cool and chill and awesome, what does she do?

She works in fashion. Works in fashion. So cool. 30. What are we doing? 30, she's going to start nagging me be a total bitch. Classic. Classic.

What are you auditioning for Rogan? Yeah, she's just going to turn 30 and start nagging my ass. What Esther, what you just said is, like, in a perfect world, you know, he shouldn't feel low southward. Right. Like, I agree with what you're saying, but like, and this is why, like, and I wrote the book, and I just went on this book door where I do think the dating conversation right now is like so men versus women. And, like, there's no male kind of talk because I think the male talk is being done. done by like really horrific people on the internet. It's a red, yeah.

You know, like the people on the internet speaking for men on dating. Yeah. Horrific. And they're not even people, they're not even in the dating pool. So it's like it's fun women talking about dating with the horrific men who are emotionally affected by dating content. So I'm here like I don't need to be a dating book, right? Like you guys said, my first book.

I wrote this because they were like, every 10 years like a straight guy writes. straight guy writes about dating and the book gets popular and whatever. I was like, well, I can be funny about dating. I've been funny about dating for, you know, however many years. I don't do this to be a dating guy. Yeah. And I do this because I want to be a comedian and it's something that I can't have it taken away from me.

I always have written a book and, you know, like you call me an author. Like, that's crazy. You know, like, I'm in that dating world too online. It's so fraudulent. It's such like hot takes and, and, you know, people trying to make money off of people. I want to make money off of doing stand-up, you know? Yeah.

Okay. I want to ask you something about this relationship because it's very fascinating to me that you broke up and you got back together and it seems like it's getting more serious. I would never give my story as the prescription either. No, no, no. So when you ended it, I believe you that you ended it because you were not ready to take the next step. But then when you're out in the world, did you come to this place of being like, I'm not going to do better than her?

No, that's, it wasn't, that wasn't the math I was doing. I was just like kind of unhappy. I was like, and then I was getting deeper with other people, you know, over the two years, I had a couple month things and three month things. And she kept coming to mind. And then I remember we got coffee that day and I was like, I was just so, and I was like, she was really happy. And I was really happy. She was happy. And like I could feel it.

You know, like I was like. Men like happy girls. Well, this is what me and my friends. It's bad for Aloha. Well, also. I have my, my partner's name's aloha and he couldn't have picked a bigger cunt. You were happy once. I met him.

He was happy once. The day he met me and then after that, it's, you know. Have you felt, though? Because I feel like I noticed, when I first started stand up, I was in college and I had a girlfriend at the time and I remember like a few open mics in. I instantly was like, okay, yeah, we have to break up. I want to fully commit to this. In my mind, I was like, oh, I can't manage having a girlfriend right now because I'm about

to like throw myself all the way into this like obsession. But then as time went on, I feel like dating actually, like casual dating, takes up 10 times the amount of time that having a steady relationship does. That's a very baseball player mentality. If you look at baseball players, they have longstanding high school sweethearts. It's like you cannot get there without that steady force in your life. Dating does take up a lot of time. But I think there's a point like you can do the opening stuff.

You can be charming for first few dates and get to a. point of like that I think when it takes up time from you know the being in a relationship takes up like you have to like explain yourself you have to like you know potential you know men are dated on potential that has to change girls when you're not dating on potential anymore and you're just this is the reality that's when dating as a comic specifically like yeah I got to get up from the table to do this this spot that doesn't pay yeah and comics don't even think about money like we think of like career. Like we think of like still doing it. Like I, you know, Kyle Canayne, I heard a quote from him through Lisa was like, you know, doing standup is the prize. I've always repeated that because like a lot of

us operate that way. We're not even doing this to be billionaires. Like we're not, that's not the mindset. The mindset of a comedian is to be able to do comedy. Like, oh, I want to go and have the show. I don't have to sell tickets. I want people to just be there and have fun. It's a very like, at its core i do believe it's a very like nice thing that we are mindset you know there's people we know you know there's comics that have their mindset is like they're like horrible and horrific you know but i think when a relationship gets involved in that it's just really hard yeah having dated a comic for 10 years at this point someone give me an olympic medal like it really is like so wonderful in many ways and i was so inspired watching bobby just absolutely like live in his dream of just you know going out there

but it's quite a challenge. Listen, I've opened for Bobby. I know the challenge. But I think it's like across the board, I think. Like because, I mean, Bobby is crazy like in his antics, his persona. But like Bobby at home, you know, can still be like very grounded and, you know, these things. And I think that just the job itself really is so unique. And I think that, you know, when you think of relationships within the comedy sphere,

it's its own very separate conversation that might not necessarily like apply to like to everybody to everybody else. I think the comedy culture is very, very anti-relationship. I think most comedians do not want you to be in a relationship. Like even like, I don't know, there's something about even crowds. Like there's something that I don't know, it feels like more appealing to be like, I'm single, my life sucks, blah, blah, blah. Like there's like date night comedy that's like different of like, oh,

my wife like people just kind of look down on relationships and comedy it's also it's a it's a it's singles tennis it's you know I've always said like it's it's it's really hard to force my dreams on someone else and make them have to like buy into something that they never like I can fail alone pretty easily I think that's what it was for me and this is because I too was a codependent partner where I couldn't leave his problems as his problems like His emotions were so labile and so up down and very rapid cycling where it was like, I didn't know if what he said on Tuesday is really what he means on Wednesday. And that's because when you have this type of career, it's like feast or famine. And one day it's a high the next day. It's a crash because something didn't go.

You know, it's not like a regular city job where you go in and you expect things. when he got bad news, I couldn't like, I had, I felt like I needed to like take that on. And it happened a lot. And also he got good news. And it was like dopamine, dopamine hit and then crash.

It was like so up down, up down because that's just the nature of being an entertainment, I feel, right? This episode is brought to you by Skips. So I've been on a cotton-only kick lately. And if it's not breathable and natural, I don't want it on my body,

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of this article from the New York Times, basically, it's about new dating apps that are like, they revolve around exercise. Okay. Okay. You? No, no, no, I'm not, I'm not saying anything about it. I'm just introducing it. Because I just know how she feels about like, I've seen her try to bargain with her Pilates instructor.

Okay, to get ready for their date, Nicole and DC stretched, hydrated, and each ate a banana. They were meeting for the first time, Just minutes before competing together as a mixed doubles team in high rocks, the popular fitness race. High rocks. I can't even know what that is. I did not know what that is. How do you not, that's a whole new thing?

It's the new CrossFit. Kind of has this whole like obstacleish kind of, yeah. Okay. For the next hour and 13 minutes, the couple ran lapsed by side and took turns doing rigorous strength exercises, signaling when they needed the other to step in at the end, flushed and sweaty. they exchanged numbers mutually impressed. At a fitness event like High Rocks, there's no faking it. Mr. Banks said a few days after the race, you're in fight or flight and you're just going with it.

And she agreed, you can't hide when you're suffering. You're huffing and puffing and you don't look cute. The couple met through Surf, the official dating app partner of High Rocks, and one of a slew of new dating apps designed to connect people who like to work out. And there's also Leg Day, which is another dating app where singles can meet while they're at this. same gym. There's a team which bills itself as the official dating app of wellness. Or cook. Just get Grindr at this point. You guys. This is for gay men and this is for men who hate fat women. Just literally have a thing on there. Just have an app that's called I hate fat people.

And they're like, yeah, come run laps with me. Okay, sure. Oh, yeah, you don't look cute when you're huffing and puffing. It's like, oh, really? He gave you his number. So it must have been fine. It's like, I'm not on the floor throwing up pissing my pissing my piss dripping down my leg. Like, there's no way. He's raising more and more gym bros. They're going to have gymbrose. Jim bro babies. Yeah, it's going to be scary. It's scary. This is scary to me.

I'm on the other side of this. Tell me more. I think it's great. Listen, I don't want to meet someone at High Rocks. Let me just put that out there. I think the premise is great. I think it is no shock that Luke can't believe this is a thing. At 25, you have large groups of people your age that are willing to go out at any time.

And I think as you get older, you want to. to do your hobbies. You want to like have your life. And if someone's into the gym and into high rocks, they also want to date. And I think if you took it away from the fitness angle is like the douchey, like the gym bro, like what if everything you did also had a dating app? Because I like going to restaurants. What if Rezi, you know, and I'm looking up like a cool restaurant and then I was on there and I could choose like my apps that I would get and someone else. matches on my, you know, my, you know, is like, I'll get the pigs in a blanket. And now we're going on a, like, and that's a way to matches.

I think like the intent of like a dating app attached to your hobby is actually a good idea. What the hobby is I could talk shit on all day long. I don't agree. Okay. I don't think I want to meet someone who has the same hobbies as me. I don't think I want to meet someone who does the same workout as me for sure. But I also understand like the desperation of wanting to. find the right person for you.

But to me, I'm like, it icks me out. And I know I'm in like a place of privilege to say that because I'm not single. I think here's what I'll say is as I think at 39, my biggest problem with like meeting someone was like literally being like, I'm going to make a friend at 39. I never made a friend. Gross, right? Right. Like that's the last thing you want to do with 39.

But you're also, if you're single at 39, you're like, I want to find the love of my life, but I hate making friends. Those two are like against each other. I thought you both had this experience of being single at 39, which is really, right. But I came, I got out of that breakup with a completely different mindset because it was a slow breakup with a lot of therapy involved and someone to kind of guide us along, even though it's still very much hurt. But I got out of that breakup feeling very like, like I wasn't lacking with the whole self-worth thing. So I was like, even, and it was just interesting because I am a woman. And I was a woman in my late 30s.

I got out of it like everyone's going to want me. And I felt that way. I truly believed it. And I also moved that way. And it was true. Sorry to interrupt. Did you want everybody? No, no.

But that's my point. Yeah. So that's what she was saying. Like you and I can really relate because I had a big problem leaving the house. Yeah, because your life is good when you're 39 and single. Yes. And it felt my life was so peaceful. Right.

Like I loved. Like being alone. and having for the first, I hadn't been alone in so long. I had lived with a boyfriend, every single boyfriend I'd ever been in a relationship with since the age of like 17. But I think to your point too is that eventually I did meet my partner and fell in love with him because we both share this one hobby. And that one hobby was our very first unofficial date, which was diving and spear fishing. Yeah. And, you know, we went out as a big group, but at the very end of the day,

it was just him and I in the water, six hours, catching fish. And that to me was so incredibly bonding because it's like when, when would I have met him anyways in the wild? And under these pretense of like, we are on a date. Exactly. And I have to talk about my life. And now you talk about your life. I think there's an age where you get tired of the formalities of it all. And just like you said, the word you hear from a lot of people single above the age of like 35 is like protecting your peace.

Yeah. That's like a big thing. I was single a short time ago. I would always say the only thing that could ruin my life is a woman. You know, in the same way, only thing that could ruin your life was a man or being in a relationship. That wasn't meant to like be mean to women. It was just like, I've got my comfort. I've got my place.

I can handle my bills. Yeah. You know, you go, you know, when you're in your 20s and you're dating with someone, you're kind of like going through this struggle together, trying to figure it out together. I think when you're in your 30s and you have it, you've done it on your own. You're like, I don't want to rock this boat with someone that I don't really. So it's like when it comes to like a hobby connected to a dating app where it's like high rocks, that's not what I'm doing. But spear fishing.

Yeah. And it's simplest core. It's like an icebreaker. It is. And it also takes the pressure off because, but I will say this one thing about the high rocks. Like that is very high potential for me to get the ick, especially because when I went with Aloha to spearfish, He was daddy. He was a hundred times better than me.

He was a way more seasoned diver, way more seasoned spear fisherman. And he kind of like took me under his wing. And he was like, wow, you're actually an incredible diver. But let me show you like, you know, how I do it was like, oh my God. Like I love this. It's so easy for me to see how you guys ended up making a baby. Yes. Like I can't imagine how hot.

Like. I mean, yeah. Like the back. My baby Poseidon. My son's name is Poseidon. Just seeing you guys. making a baby. I can visualize it so easily. I know what you mean. Yeah. It's like the fact that he was good at the thing that you are good at and like, but he was better than you. Way better. So the

high rocks thing. It's like my question is you walk in there and you go on this date. There is pressure, I think, as a man to really be the superior athlete. Because if I'm seeing you piss your pants, like Luke said, if I'm seeing you struggling or breathing harder than me, I might not. Listen, I think that's okay. Yeah. We're playing a numbers game here. So with like the high rocks thing, there's going to be someone that you're going to go, look at this fucking idiot.

You know, like that's, right. This guy is really a try hard. He's trying to lift too much. His knees are buckling. The beauty of a dating app through the high rocks, and again, I'm sounding like I'm defending the indefensive. Anyone I've met involved with high rocks is a exhausting hang.

But I would say that it's, It's like when someone sucks on a plane and then you make eye contact with someone else on the plane and was like, you see that loser? You would hope that you would see that person at Hirox and that's who you would connect with is the other person that goes,

whether that's like lover or friend, you know, like you started, I think the apps, what they do is they take away excitement. The excitement that I think a lot of people need of like this chance encounter. And if you put the hobby first and then you had the app related to the hobby. I think it just gives you,

something to talk about like if I'm if I'm relating it back to spear fishing it was like aloha like hey what kind of fish is this like and he would text me back and in a non-romantic way and that was really nice for me if I had a question about like a wetsuit or a specific type of spear gun like it was just a way for us to connect that what didn't feel like there was any pressure because it was just information being passed between two people this is like me when I ask you questions about health yes we're just getting to know each other. You are a habitual overstepper though. Because if I don't answer you, like on the dot about do you think this is cancer, then she goes on and on and on. Why aren't you answering me? I'll wait. I'll be patient. Wait, Luke, I'm curious. So you would not do a dating app like this. I mean, honestly, surprisingly, I think the Rezi idea is actually a genius idea.

Someone who really likes food. I'm like, wait, that's actually awesome. I was always like pretty tough. Like I was someone who always was kind of on dating. apps for the majority of my dating life. And like it's funny. It's like, you know, it's an easy way to like do it and like whatever, especially in like college. It's like a way to have like a lot of casual relationships. I met my girlfriend on a dating app. You know, clearly it like kind of works. But I do think it's like a stupid thing. Like did you got you guys just got connected through friends. I assume you and Aloha. Yeah. So I went to a yoga class because the instructor was my friend. And I saw this man in the corner. The most inflexible man. fighting for his life, just sweating beads, just like in a really bad, like, he couldn't even do like a basic, like cross leg.

Well, it was my first class. Yeah. There was another guy who eventually like this gorgeous man who after class was like, hey, I love your teeth. And I was like, okay, weird. So I was getting hit on. And inflexible daddy over here was just kind of like, you know, didn't really like talk to me. And then that's how I met him at a yoga class while he was struggling. and because I thought it was really cute

that someone who was, you know, he wasn't afraid to do a really poor job. High rock style. High rock style. Yeah, truly. Origin story. Yeah, yeah. And he, and I really like that.

I like when someone is like, I probably suck at this and I'm probably going to embarrass myself. But I know this is maybe good for me to stretch. And I was like, this poor man. Do you like that because you would never do that? Because you don't like to suck at things. I like to suck at things alone. I like to then.

show up to like before I ever took my first yoga class I made sure that I had done yoga for three years at home But that's because I got beat as a child I was like a I just think when you see someone in person like there's like an instant connection usually with someone who like At least for me that I know I'm gonna like and like there was on the dating apps there's just so many like people sit down and it's like this date is over It's almost like what people talk about with auditions. It's like this is absolutely not instantly. There's nothing you could say and I think that that's something you cannot account for on dating apps is the fact that like there is a chemistry that you wouldn't know you'd have with someone like even on someone you would swipe left on yeah and even while this man was struggling and he was you know 20 steps behind this other guy who was hitting on me i felt like connect like i felt something for him

there was something that stirred within me they called that vulnerability maybe i mean he was struggling at something that he didn't mind that he was learning something new yeah and i think that was such like a positive thing I took from it because he's like a big burly very seemingly like in command person and he had no shame about him he's like here I am I'm struggling yeah just let us know how you guys feel about these they're red flags or green flag red flag green flag this is a man if you wears flip flops uh situational oh because it's like you're in Hawaii my man is we live in Hawaii outside of the beach are really in right now they are But knowing that is kind of weird.

Keep me out of it. Keep me out of it. Knowing about flip flops. Let's go outside of the beach. I, right now, I have to say green flag just because I am with a Hawaiian man. And also, we live in Hawaii. Like, if you're not wearing flip flops and you're wearing shoes on the beach, like, that's an ick. No, outside of the beach, though.

What do we think? Mainland. It's a green flag for me. It's fine. It's fine. What about, like, into a restaurant? Where, though, in L.A.? In, like, in Korea town?

Yeah, that's an ick. It just seems dangerous. It seems dangerous. Yeah, it's not smart city. Like when you're not supposed to wear flip flops, like when you work on a set, because there's like building stuff happening, like woodwork.

So it's like just not safe to me to have open. What were you wearing when the two times that you stubbed your toe or broke your toe? It was home barefoot. Well, the flip the flip flops thing is, it's funny to me that this was very much like depending on where you were in the country. Men with flip flops and jeans in Arizona.

Like women in Arizona. the worst thing you could ever describe to them. They had such an association with douchebag and men and jeans with flip-flops. I think that's such a sick look. I'm sorry, that's so dope. It's funny that most of the looks that millennial women are like put off by are like the Gen Z looks. Yeah. Like I, that's why I like, I feel lucky to be a millennial.

Like everything Luke wears would not fit my body type. Like I'm built like a tissue. box and he came in with like big baggy pants and a t-shirt. I feel so lucky to not be Gen X or Gen Z. They both are like the clothing for their generations just wouldn't have worked for me. You live in Florida. Yes. Do you own flip-flops?

Of course. I'm a big flip-flop guy. Wow. The hottest thing a guy can do is be totally okay that X exists. Yes. Like I think you have to like really go. Yeah, if you don't want to fuck me, that's cool. Of course you don't want to fuck me.

I so agree. If you have no fear of icks, you are the most fuckable guy. You're winning. I mean, that's why when I see the comments to the anything ick online from men, I'm like, this guy definitely doesn't talk to women ever. Like you can just tell. It's like a black light. You know, it's like if a cum stain. Yeah, define the cum stain of people.

If you talk about the ick and a man gets mad, you have found. a cum stain of a person. Like, that is, like, the best way to find an angry man because the ick is, like, a funny conversation. Like, the idea that every woman should want to fuck me for every reason I find to leave the house is crazy. That's it. But, and, like, I can also find it for women, too.

Like, there are women that I can't have fun with the it conversation. Where I'm like, oh, that's a miserable person. Like, when they're, like, rude to the waitstaff, I'm like, yeah, no one would like rude to the weight stuff. I know. That's not an ick. That's a turn on.

Like one of the funniest I saw was some girl who had taken a video of a plane during takeoff and she was like, I don't know why, but like the thought of my boyfriend being strapped in just going diagonally. Moving in a diagonal direction gave her the ick. And I'm like, that is so funny. The ick is only fun when one woman's ick is another woman's husband. That's the fun part of the conversation. If you can't have fun with it in that way, if you're going to tell a woman she should never date a man who does this one thing, you're an asshole.

If you're a guy who says, well, this is childish. You're a fucking loser. You know, like, it's like, it's pretty simple to me. It's weird when something's so simple to me, I'm like, man, I can't believe it's not that simple. To like, like, for a guy to, like, respond on an ick video is like the dumbest. I can't believe it. Telling on himself. I know.

If they stand still. at a concert? Ooh. What if they move too much? You know, they can go all ways. I feel like your generation stands a lot stiller than millennials. I feel like the millennials, like we know

how to genuinely watch a show, put our whole hearts into it. I think that the watched younger generation is a little stiffer. I've seen them. I'm like, you guys are stiff. To be honest, though, like when I took my baby daddy

to Siza, we weren't married yet. If he had been dancing. Right. Your baby daddy's throwing it back at Siza. I was dancing. It's like, I'll dance. You stand there. Yeah, but you're Princess Diana. Your Princess Diana gifted Charles of, on his birthday, I believe, of a video of her dancing. You're Princess Diana. Like, you want to be, I'm the prize, right? Right. Does a nod count? If I'm like bopping my head, I'm like, swing.

The dropping your head thing, I feel like is too much like you think you're like the king of this court. Yes. What about the hand up? What about like the frat flick where people go like that? Yeah, yeah. I mean, just like attempt to like show me that like you're in with, we're enjoying this. Yeah. Because if, I don't think you'd like it either.

If Dave was like arms crossed like, oh, what are we doing here? Well, no, he wouldn't. I mean, he was in a good mood because he knew that if he attended Cizzo with me, then he was going to get to go play poker later. because we were in Vegas. So he was definitely like happy. But yeah, I just sort of like a chaperone, like energy out of a man. I know you said that like when you broke up.

That's just obsessed with my relationship. Yeah. No, I can't think about it. You broke up and you're like, I don't want to reach out because I don't want to like mess with someone if I'm not sure. And myself. I mean, I'm being selfish, too. I don't know. I'm not trying to be a hero.

You said that you don't. When people do reach out, you don't think that they're doing it for their ego. You think that they're just like... I think it could be all things. I don't think it's necessarily has to be their ego. That's why I always like, you know, when women ask about ghosting, I always tell anyone who's been ghosted, break up with your ghoster. When you send a text that's like, hey, I'm ending this. I don't really feel, I feel turned off by this behavior.

They go back to text you again. That's the first text they see. That's the last text they received. So now you're adding like a little bit of a barrier for like, explain yourself. You're coming back here? Our last text, whether you want to admit it or not, was me ending it with you and telling you your behavior sucks. You have to add, I'm not saying it's the biggest barrier. We have to like look at the fat part of the bell curve.

Like most people, not all, but most people will look at that and go, hey, the reason I'm back is, or I apologize for how this went before explanation. So like I think a lot of people who have been ghosted, their fear is that this person has some sort of ability to lie to them that they've never experienced before. Because when you're ghosted, you go, oh my God, how would I not know that that person was going to like fuck and then leave? Like you're like questioning your own judgment. Judgment. So you, so when people get so scared of like the person that goes to them because they're like, well, if they could do it once, why can't they do it again? So that's why like breaking up with someone and letting them know like, you know, like, you know,

hey, what is this? Is it your ego? You know, if you come back. I want to ask you about a specific situation, which is someone that I know, my sister. Yeah. Every time she moves on to someone new, this ex, it's like somehow he senses it and he comes back.

And then once she's like, okay, then he like rits himself. Like he's like, eh, you know, shit's on her again. And it's this cycle over and over again. I'm like, what are you, what's your opinion of that? Like every time she moves on, he suddenly wants her. It sucks. First of all, I feel bad that that's happening.

But like, I would question like how they have such easy contact with them. How is the door available to them? How much is your, and I'm not trying to blame that. I do, she's the victim in this scenario. But I would say like, what are our strategies that were different this time? to communicate to this person who's actively hurting her every time she moves on. Men need to have like the head cut off. Like you got to shoot for the heart because he might be operating in a world and I'm not,

I'm giving him empathy, which may be not deserved. But he might be operating in a world where he might not know the gravity of what he's doing. I think he does. But I think you bring up a good point. It's like, why does she keep letting him in? And that's the whole, that's my lifelong issue. Well, why isn't he blocked on everything? That's what I ask myself.

Right. Every time I've talked about dating, it's been with women. You know, I don't go on like all-male podcasts and be like, you know, what this dating shit? Like, it's always been a debate, a discussion. Are men outside of like these really awful red pill bros able to kind of sit and have these like meaningful, long-drawn conversations about dating without like, with like true vulnerability? I think they can. But I think it is not. not practiced. Like the conversations that I'm always a part of are very much like brunch time conversations.

Like they've been had. Like the podcast that I'm on where I'm talking about dating and relationships, like, I could tell I'm dealing with people who have had these conversations before. Before, yeah. Like even Luke, when he was talking about like, I'm just worried about we're going to get it for lunch. Like that's so funny to me because it's like he spoke to the whole vibe I would have in my 20s. Yeah. And I was in relationships in my 20s thinking.

thinking just like him, oh, I could be in a relationship. I want, my parents were married. I want marriage. I want kids. I think a lot of men are like, know they want the thing out here, but aren't really,

are more flippant about the stuff that gets them to there. Yeah. I have a question? Yeah. Have you ever had your heart broken? I've had my heart broken. Yay, two men talking about relationship.

I know. We're so psyched. I've been like, I've had like that bodily feeling. of like like man I can't make this work that like like I had a I remember like I was trying to date this girl and I'm like like like felt like sand falling through my hands and I was like what am I missing and you're just not they just don't like you you know and you have to like kind of that's a bummer deal with that but that's okay

you know like that feeling I was just a rejection in general and I know we've all gone through it but like it really is like in the moment you're You're just like, how I ask? I do think that maybe Ben could benefit from that because I've had my heart like ripped out. Right. Someone was very in love with like coming out of high school and stuff. And I think that's what made me appreciate the fact that like you got to treat other people properly. Right.

You were a little hard right now and you were talking about someone else ripping your heart out of your chest. I'd slap you. Really? I was in high school though. No, no, no. I don't think she is kidding. Yeah. No, it's because I'm like, you mean I'm not the first person you've absentee.

Absolutely been head over heels. That's so honest guy. And really, I am just kidding. Look at a man. It opens up and they trash him. They're all full of shit, man. Why won't these men open up? Well, if you were my guy, had slapped me.

I don't know, but really. I'm not kidding. It would elicit a jealousy in me. Like my, you know, not so healthy self would be like, I can't believe I'm not the first and last girl he's fallen in love with. It's like that very childish part of my brain. It's so weird. Because you're such a, like, the.

queen. It's like when I look at you, I'm like, you should be able to hear any of that and be like, like, yeah, right. I do. And that's that that's exactly how I respond. Like, I am so poker face in my, in how I execute and how I carry myself is very much like that where it's like, okay, tell me more, tell me more. And everything that he's telling me, oh, she was gorgeous. She was this. And I'm like, oh, cool. Yeah, that must have been really tough. But if you don't think that there's a fire burning somewhere inside me, of course, there's, I'm human. And there's still. a little child that exists there that was like wounded for whatever reason. But I've been therapists and I know that I cannot behave that way in real life.

So I'm just going to listen. And I'm going to listen and take my intel and get to know this man for exactly who he is without interfering. And I'm going to execute in a healthy way because I want a healthy relationship. But yeah, I'm a jealous bitch. Are you kidding me? I'm like, with a fuck. And now I'm starting looking for her Instagram.

I'm like, who is this fucking bitch? You know? So it's like we all have that. And there's a part of me that's just made peace that she'll never leave, but I can't act that way in real life. Yeah. Yeah. So she can come. She can't surface.

Right. You can feel it. You can feel it, but just not act on it. I said it because also it's like, I wouldn't be able to have a good relationship if it wasn't for that experience, right? Like I was that guy before that happened. Self-centered, selfish, leading people on, right? But then if someone breaks up with you because your own actions, because you're an asshole or not a good partner, it does actually force you to do some. introspection at some point it took many years you know you have nowhere else to go but like inward

and say like how in the fuck that I really like fuck that up yeah it's also if you if you're having like short-term relationships I think like what the dating apps kind of like encourage is like oh I'm gonna have a gonna date people like going a few dates and see what happens yeah going on a few dates is not like opening up you know you can kind of like repeat the same thing you did for the first few dates That is so true. Over and over again. And that's when you can go, I'm not really there yet.

I can pack it up. You know, I can move on to something else. And it's just funny that, you know, guy brings up, you know, getting your heart ripped up. And like, I just think the, the male side of this is like, I think it's a difficult thing to get into as far as having, in a public way, in a letting the commenters weigh in. way it's like you're always seen as a guy as like especially if you end things and if you've

ended relationships you're seen as this like guy looking for more sex yeah and you're not seen as like you know what the match wasn't right for me and I'm not at the right time and I need to take a minute and maybe I could only handle being in a one year relationship rather than being in a long standing future with someone yeah this is really important to hear though because I have a son And, you know, prior to having a son, I was on that camp of like just men ain't shit, men ain't shit, men ain't shit. It's like all men, all men. No one is absolved. And now that I have a son, I'm like, wait, this can't be true. Like the way I've been feeling, the way I've been thinking, like there are incredible men in my life. And I've just repeated the same mantra of men ain't shit. And I don't want my son to, you know, feel that way and so i also don't like the not all men people yeah do you know what i mean like i hate that guy that's like not all men like i just think everyone is like you know shades of gray you know like and and you know that and i listen i did the dating the the book tour and everything mostly women

coming out it's you know men generally think they're doing okay with dating men generally think like that is interesting because i always feel like not surprising there's this whole anti-man thing happening but it's like we never truly want to stop learning about men because it's like we do want to make a peaceful pack at some point I believe this like that's why I brought it I brought up during the book talk I brought up like a a thread of this woman who I didn't even know who she was but it was like hey men you know grow a beard when you don't have a chin like come on already and I'm like I get it like you know beard is a male contouring like I've seen the bit before I get it.

I get why this is like fun internet fodder. And to come back to like what I was saying in the beginning, like, the only guy that's like angry at that is like a really fucked up dude. Like, you know, like the only guy that, like I saw that I rolled and I was like, no. Move right along. Yeah. You know, but I. So when it comes to like what's the dating conversation on the internet, it's like,

the only people you're hearing from are like emotionally affected dudes. And it's like, you know, where I'm like, okay, well, all my friends are. douchebags who also got married and had kids and have lives that everyone wants. I'm sure Aloha. I'm sure Dave. I think these guys are great guys, I'm sure. And I'm also sure they're not online responding to, you know. Oh my God.

That would be an ick. If I saw just Aloha commenting on the beard thing, I'd be like, we have to break up. Dude, are you out of your fucking mind? Yeah. That's the thing. I'm like, those are guys that would be my friends. You know, and I'm like, okay, well, that's not really represented in the conversation. Right. That is true. That's a really good point.

You know, I remember we first started this podcast and I got so much hate. Truly, I was like the star of the hate. Like it was so great. And I literally was like, should I quit? Like, am I ruining it? And you said something really insightful to me that I'll never forget. You're like, Esther, most people who listen don't comment. They buy a ticket to the live show. They buy a sweatshirt. And that's it. Yeah, they move on.

But the people who like hated me were. so loud that I thought that that was the whole. Yeah, that was it. Yeah, it's easy to get swept in in believing that that is all men. Because those are the men commenting on the internet, you know? You know, those quiet people also go to the comments. Oh, what are people saying? I'm quiet people.

I read all the comments because that's, I actually pause the video and I just, or let the video run and I just read comments as I'm watching. Let me see what the crazies are saying. And, you know, it's, it's like to go back to what Bob, was saying with the legacy media like it's kind of fucking annoying that like the only way we find those quiet people is if those angry people exist like yeah it's like it's like fossil fuel it's like this horrific thing for the environment is needed to make all these wonderful things go so funny it's like do I have to make this thing like I have a special coming out that I'm like

really proud of it's not like I just watched some of these special on Netflix, I'm like, what the fuck is this? Like, it's like being mean to people in the crowd and like, it's not even personal. Like, they're not even talking about things in their life. I did, like, mine's a one hour story about going to the beach with my parents. Like, I love to. Sounds amazing. It was fun.

It was my dad asked me how much I weighed while we were at the beach. I love it. Almond dads are really under-talked about. Underrepresented. I have almond parents. A good, tag team of almonds. Oh, my God. Do you have siblings?

I have a younger brother. So this story was a two-minute story that I was like, well, I like, I like, I liked that people connected to it. And like I was, and then I was like, oh, let me talk about my mom, let me talk about my dad. It turned into an hour special about going to the beach with my parents and vacation with my parents. It's coming on when this comes out, I think. Oh, my God, I'm excited to watch that.

But I'm like, who's going to want this? No one's going to comment. No one's going to be angry from this. Maybe you could get some anti-Semitic people to watch. I hope. I can only hope. It shouldn't be that hard. Yeah.

I don't even mention being. I used to have Jewish people going to the show. They go, do non-Jews get it? I'm like, I didn't even, they were laughing. What are you talking about? So I'm like proud of it, but I'm like, you know, in this world that we live in, I'm like, who knows? You know, like there's not, you know,

I don't feel the need, I even say it in the special. I'm like, I only tell stories that are true and I only make fun of people I've met. I like that. Me too. And it's like my comedy bylaws. Anyone else can do what they want, but like. I like those bylaws, right?

Like so many people make fun of people I'm like, you don't know that person. If you can't fuck with them. If you don't fuck with them, don't fuck with them. On that same note, like, only I can make fun of my mom. If you come from my mom or anyone else in my family, like, if you agree with me, if I'm shitting on my mom and you start to agree, like, I'll beat you up. I know that vibe so much.

Like when someone, like, I had someone after a show, they, I did the stuff about, I have like stuff about my mom and I'm like, talk about her. And then this woman goes, I get it. You know, she came up for a picture afterwards. She goes, I get it. You know, like, I have horrific parents too. And I'm like, well, hold on. My mom, how dare you call my mother?

Horrific. I was like, I love them. I hang out with them every week. What are you talking? Horific. And she's like, I don't talk to them anymore. I'm like, hold on. You've gone to step too far.

Like. I love my mom. But I only I. That's my right is reserved. We can go forever. This is a blast. Jared. I appreciate you guys having me.

I'm game. We have so many more. I'll be back. Okay. That's like the every time I talk to someone I'll like when are you gonna be here again? I'm like I don't know it just happens yeah but I like you guys have to watch Jared's special get his book walking red flags what else? Watch the special on YouTube Netflix Netflix oh my god I'm excited it's called the

family plan it's all Netflix have comments when you said comments I was thinking well I'm like I don't know if I get anyone going to threads to be like oh I see You know, like, the Hinchcliffe special is going to be popular because everyone hated so much. Like, that's crazy to me. Like, isn't that like a, aren't we living in hell? Or you could have people like me who, like, I cannot consume anything other than, like, positive things right now. So a day at the beach sounds about right. It sounds so perfect.

No, but the fact that his parents think he's fat, that's where I'm like, I'm in. A parent calling you fat at the beach is mine is where I need to exist. He goes, how much do you weigh? I go, why? He goes, no reason. I was like, literally I told this story. It happened in 2018. And then I didn't, I tried to talk about it and it never worked.

And as we know, when something doesn't work and you're like, well, I guess I just won't fuck with that. And then I had no material. And I was like, I got to try this. And then I had a joke about how I vacation with my parents still at 40. And I was like, oh, my dream. We love this. Yes. Yeah, you're a good son.

Well, I talk about how we look weird. you know so then I had that opening joke and I was like okay now I have an opening we look weird is so funny that's your

that's goals for me vacationing with my 40 year old son you guys thank you slugs and see you next week with the grand news thank you guys

so