Trash Tuesday w/ Esther Povitsky & Khalyla Kuhn - Stirring up Controversy w/ Justin Martindale

Episode Date: October 22, 2024

* Skimmmmmmmmmmmmms (WHISPER VOICE): SHOP SKIMS Bras at: http://www.skims.com/trashtuesday. Now available in 62 sizes (30A - 46H).  *KALSHI! FUN! A SITE to Place Bets on Whether Your Favorite Popstar will Win Album of the year + MORE. Listeners: Kalshi is giving a $20 bonus on their app for the first 500 sign ups. Dang!!  Visit http://kalshi.com/trashtuesday & download the app!!  *HERS: Start your free online visit today at http:// forhers.com/trashtuesday. That’s F-O-R-H-E-R-S dot com slash TRASHTUESDAY for your personalized weight loss treatment options.  Hers Weight Loss is not available everywhere. Compounded products are not FDA-approved or verified for safety, effectiveness, or quality. Prescription required. Restrictions apply. *SEE ESTHER ON TOUR: https://linktr.ee/EstherPTouring ________________________________________________________________________ This week we are still in our temporary stu w/ the hilarious Justin Martindale, we talk summer pop stars, high cholesterol, warm salsa, chopped salad, justin’s hot brother & why Khalyla thinks Esther would make the perfect Mormon wife.  More Justin! IG: https://www.instagram.com/justinmartindale/?hl=en YT: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCkD7ElmIzU6UekY-WTDIEVg Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLqE73YLSOO_z31osf1VzSAoy8fqiXk1S0   Chapters: 00:00 Justin Martindale is Here! 01:30 Popstar Check In  14:30 Esther addresses Soap-Gate 21:38 Hailey’s Smoothie Has Gotten Enough Attention 26:45 The 2009 film “The Brothers”  31:00 Food Nostalgia  39:00 What Are Food Non Negotiables? 52:00 What Are We Watching & Why is it the Mormon Show? ___________________________________________________________________ Listen to Trash: Trash iTunes Audio Feed: https://bit.ly/TrashTuesdayPod Trash Spotify Audio Feed: https://bit.ly/TTPodAudio Follow Trash: IG: https://www.instagram.com/itstrashtuesday/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@itstrashtuesday More Esther: TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@esthermonster Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/esthermonster/   More Khalyla:  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/khalamityk/ Tigerbelly Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/@UCIyIoM_Nd8HtY19fuR_ov2A    Production Team: Tiny Legends, LLC:  https://www.instagram.com/tinylegends.prod/ Stella Young: https://www.instagram.com/estellayoung/ Guy Robinson: https://www.instagram.com/grobfps/ Ariel Moreno: https://www.instagram.com/jade.rabbit.cce/ Edited By: Case Blackwell:  https://www.instagram.com/caseblackwell/

On this podcast, like a few weeks ago, I said soap is a scam and people got really upset. Are they really? Yes. Wait, like bar of soap? Like all soap. Not all soap. I know not, hashtag not all soap. I totally understood what you were saying, which is like you're overstripping your skin.

Exactly. And I think that like- You want a little bit of your bacteria. Some of it. Yeah. Yeah, you want your flora to thrive. Yeah. But I think why people were mad was not the soap thing.

It was the not showering for 10 days. Yeah, there's that. Oh. Yeah. Shop Skims Bra at skims.com, now available in 62 sizes, 30A to 46H. If you haven't yet, 30A to 46H. If you haven't yet, be sure to let them know we sent you.

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That's F O R H E R S dot com-R-S.com slash TrashTuesday for your personalized weight loss treatment options. ForHers.com slash TrashTuesday. Hers weight loss is not available everywhere. Compounded products are not FDA approved or verified for safety, effectiveness, or quality. Prescription required, restrictions apply. Hi, Justin Martindale.

Hi, Justin Martindale. Hello, how are you? Hilarious. Ladies. Comedian who we've been on line up, I've been on lineups with you for over 10 years at this point, at the Comedy Store every Friday. Yeah, we kick it, we say hi. We talk gaga, we're like, what's going on?

By the way, did you ever go to the Eras Tour? No. Ah! I'm a grown person, no, I didn't go. I'm not, no. Did you? I did. But so you have this, you have like a Taylor blind spot kind of,

like you're not. Ooh, interesting. Is it intentional blind spot? No, she's just, I mean, now that she's endorsed Kamala Harris, I'm like. But like as, as like an artist, I think it's kind of, she's just very like, I don't know, programmed I guess.

Like I just feel like they're, everyone wants to know her take on things. And I get it, like she's a nice person and she pays her bus drivers and all that stuff. But like, it's just, it's not me. I like a jam, a bop. Yeah. Like sad girl in the attic music. I like a jam, a bop. Yeah. I like sad girl in the attic music.

I was with you for a long time. I did convert, but I absolutely get your point of view. There's a lot of conversions. Like there's some people who have converted. Yeah. And the faith of a convert can be stronger than an original. So I'm not saying I'm that, but I'm looking at.

Because you go from a zero to a hundred. Yeah. In a very short amount of time versus someone who's been following her career since she was 14. Maybe, I don't know. I mean. She's got some songs that I like. Yeah, of course.

I have like, I have maybe two Taylor Swift songs that I really like. How are you feeling about Britney Spears these days? I think she's on math. Oh. I'm just gonna say it. Allegedly, we can say allegedly, right? Yeah, everyone says it.

She's like, her voice is like full like vocal fry to the point where I wanna like ride a Ferris wheel only to jump off of it. Like get out of the carnival bucket. Is she still with that boy fee? I don't think so, but she's just like, the vocal fry is just like, so I just saw she was in the V&A's and there was this girl named Sabrina. I think it's Sabrina carpenter or something. I'm like, oh you think you know, like

Oh, you mean song of the summer? She's like yeah, and she is kissing an alien and I thought that was weird because like why didn't you just use a girl? It's just weird. So I turned it off and I took a bath and and then on the carpet She said but my name and I forget sometimes that I'm famous because I'm like a bath and then on the carpet, she said, my name, and I forget sometimes that I'm famous because I'm like a mom and eee. And she did that and I'm like, and I'm out. And I am out. Wait, okay, a lot to unpack.

First, the first thing that comes up with me, like with Brittany, because I grew up at the church of Brittany. Sure. You know, I VHS recorded that Slave for You VMA performance. I watched it every day after school over and over again. Like, I just, she is God, right? And she's also the girl that like, I'm sorry,

is there anyone in this room that didn't want to be Britney Spears? Like. You didn't. Okay, maybe, okay. Wait, Kaila! How dare you betray. I'm sorry, I just, was a you know, so you brown immigrant Who just didn't necessarily connect but of course I loved her stuff

Yeah, just was you know, maybe more into Scott's tap and Creed see not everyone has to be Taylor Swift fan Right. I've been worse by the way because they kind of had a similar trajectory But it is just so- You were in your Creed era. I was in my Creed era. Someone needed to be. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha.

Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Oh my God. I just heard the news today. Oh, that's my Squat song. Oh man.

Yeah. That's a good one. We love this one, over. I think he's making a comeback too. Please don't shit on Scott's death. I don't know, he's doing something. I think he's doing something. He's always doing something. We love this one, over. I think he's making a comeback too. Please don't shit on Scott's death. I don't know, he's doing something. I think he's doing something. He's always doing something.

He's doing something, but I think it might be. Meth two? No, I think it's like, they're either going on tour again or I wanna say he's like doing Broadway or something like that. No way, that would be a great move. Something like that, I can't remember. I'm sick of Broadway being used as like, oh, a great move. Like it's for the kings and queens of the stage.

It's not for a PR switch up. So you're not happy about like the Ariana Maddox. Look, in a sense, does that make me feel like I'm one step closer somehow? Yes, by then letting novices run the stage. But no, then I think of the hard, bread and butter, Broadway people who are out there. The Patty DePone's, the Bernie Depp theaters.

Yes, or what about the chorus girls who are getting to dance class every day in New York City and they're lining up in the auditions. One of them needs to get a lead role and we're taking away from them, that's all, that's all. Then Michelle shows up from Selling Sun, so they're like, get her in here, she's playing Phantom. You know, and you're like, what?

How? I mean, that is true, like when I see like an, you know, an Eva Noblazada, I'm like, okay, that's pedigree, that's Broadway pedigree, right? And I know what you mean, but it is still, it's not to say that Ariana can't do it because she clearly is talented.

Totally, and I'm nothing, like full support, but I'm just saying there's two sides to every coin. You're a purist. I'd love to be, but I'd be lying if I didn't say that when Pamela Anderson was playing Roxy Hart, I didn't really wanna go see it. I mean, the reviews were god awful and I just didn't make use of my time that way, but like.

But that documentary though. Yes, the documentary. And now I wanna go see her movie, The Last Showgirl. I know. Which everyone was like, it got a five hour standing ovation. Why are we doing like 15 minute standing ovations? Why are we doing that?

It's all we have left. We have no other way to express love other than the like button. Oh my God. Danny, who's timing? I don't know, who is timing? Is there someone with a stopwatch? I will be damned if I am doing a six minute applause

after Transformers 3. You know what I mean? Like, let alone going to see that, but being like, mm. I've never seen ovations like this before. Is Sabrina Carpenter the closest we've ever come to like the next Britney? I would, ehh.

Because I'm really hard on the chapel rhone. Well yeah, but chapel's like the next Gaga. Yeah. That is true, but I feel as though, I don't know. She's just, I feel like she's the new like fluffy pop princess. So, okay, who else has been a fluffy pop princess in this way?

Charlie XCX, she's kind of, not fluffy pop, she's grittier, she's kind of like the Xtina. Yeah. And then, and then, like, Chapel, I mean, I just love her so much. That's the thing. Charlie XCX is the closest we've come to Xtina Stripped. Yeah.

That era, which we've all been chasing that era since the day it came out out and we've been failing. This is really sad to hear if you are ex Tina. What? She's really made like, you know, a very recent transformation. God bless those M-PIC, seriously. She is just, she had that genie in the bottle

and stuck it in her stomach and like lost all of it. Like she looks so good. Incredible. Like so good. Like you know what? You see like a big transformation, like weight loss thing, and you're usually like,

mm, but she looks better than ever. She should be the poster child because there are some Ozempics gone wrong, right? But her face looks great. Everything looks great. And you're like, fuck. Here's my bone to pick with Xtina right now and this is why I literally have tuned her out

and it's so immature and weird, but she started a Vegas residency. It starts at midnight. What are we doing? Like the moms, the lames, the nerds, we need a 7 p.m. show time. Okay, Christina, give one. Give one option per.

Have a Sunday matinee. Yeah. Sell popcorn. Give me a soda. Just grind on the floor before sundown. Like, yeah. I mean, that is actually really funny. Like, just a matinee where you can bring your kids

and you're just like. Yeah, they do that. Movie theaters, they do like one showing a week where it's like the lights are less, they have the lights up a little bit and you can like breastfeed and whatever. Really? Yeah, yeah, I have not made it to one.

Oh, I wonder, do they allow like creeps in there? Yeah, you're like, can I go? If you're going to creep out, not like, what there? That is interesting. Maybe the creeps are like mapping out the schedule of when it's mommy and baby time. It's probably really hard though to like stroll in there confidently just like a single man.

Yeah. To the mommy and baby anything. Or they're like, oh, my wife's in there. Hmm. You know. It's like, well, sir, you're dressed in a trench coat. Have a detective hat on. You can't come in here.

Damn, I should have worked out my wardrobe better. Have you seen any pop stars live lately or anyone that you're like, is amazing live? Any pop stars live. And do you, how do you feel about Chappell? I love her. Yeah. Like that's the thing, like,

and I'm not like anti-Taylor or whatever. It's just kind of like, it's not my thing. However, like over the summer, it was just like, I heard Espresso. And I didn't know Sabrina Carpenter. I was just kind of like, oh, she's like some Disney girl or high school music. Yeah, she was a no, but a Disney show. Yeah, yeah. So I was like, OK, whatever. And then Espresso came out. I was like, right.

Oh, right. I was like, this is so fun. I think we even like I saw you like at the store and I was just like Espresso came out, I was like, right? Right? I was like, this is so fun. I think we even like, I saw you like at the store and I was just like, Espresso? Right, we were like, yes. This needs to be covered. It was just like a fun, like late summer vibe. And then, then Chapel came out and I was like, oh, this is cool.

This is like rock and roll. It's like artistry, like, it's just, it's just some, it's substance. It's not just like this kind of gimmick, I guess. Yeah. And then like the girl can sing and then I respected her more cause she's like, I've been doing this for 10 years.

Like she's outside of a hot dog stand, like playing or piano, knowing care. No, those are my favorite videos to watch. Me too. Of her just in the park. Yeah. With no one watching her. Yeah.

And. Isn't it crazy how you go from insane person to successful pop star like that? It's just, there's no middle ground. You're either completely insane outside a hot dog stand annoying everyone or the most important person of our time. What is the difference though? Because they are talented, right?

It's really just whether or not someone's like, all right, here, let me pluck you. Yeah. But you guys, Sabrina, same thing. Okay, look, is it different? Yes, but there is a similar trajectory that I don't want to ignore when we speak on this. Sabrina has been in pop music for 10 years,

trying to make it, has had some success because she was on the Disney show, she had the like teeny bopper fame, whatever, but had no mainstream relevancy at all. And like, but you kind of knew who she was. I can't keep up with these kids. I feel like, like I'm like now at an age where I'm like, is this still okay to talk about?

Yeah. Wait, but I just kind of have to let that question go. I refuse to. There's an age appropriate discussion to be had. What else, who else would we be talking about? That's age appropriate. Scott Stapp. I don't know.

Scott Stapp. That's all we have. We are talking about. Maggie Smith. The new lead singer for Lincoln Park, a woman. I know. Wait, do you think that like the okay the kids who? This music is made for right like espresso is made for what people in their 20s when their teens

Do you think those fans are like wait? Why do old people was it like are they judging us like why are those old people liking the music that we like? I don't think so because I think that's why I love chapel a lot. Because it's refreshing. Because it's like all age, like all ages, it doesn't matter. And it's not like this, like, it's not over sexualized. I think that's really annoying to you.

And it's not like auto-tune. I'm so exhausted with just these like, just auto-tuned bots, just, you know, I'm going to the club and I'm humping the floor. And you're like, what? Like, give me like a bop with a story and like a bridge, a chorus, you know, something. I totally agree.

I am really, I am exhausted by auto-tune. I think we've overdone it. I think in general, like the whole world, whether it's like vape to cigarettes, auto-tune to real singing, like let's go analog. I feel, are we all feeling that? Yeah. Talk to me in person.

I don't want to do the long FaceTime or text. Let's get together, sit down. I don't know. I'm just, that's where my mentality is leaning. I think I'm just sad and lonely. my friend has a daughter and she's 12 And she was telling me that she just facetimes all of her friends because they don't know how to hold the phone to their ear Is it is their wrist loose is there no they just say they just face time their friends and talk to them on FaceTime Because they don't they don't understand the concept of like, hello? Like, so they're just like, hey.

I do sort of get that. Yeah, I'm not against it. I'm not a phone person either. If I am on a phone, it's on speaker cause I don't want the pimples. Oh. I thought that's the radiation. Oh no, I just kind of break out here

when I put like an object that I can use. I don't know you guys, radiation's like a really good substitute for filler. So it's like just really just like. Is that what you've been doing? No, everyone asked if I'm either on Monjaro or like getting Botox or fillers. Someone asked if I had a hair piece the other day.

It was extremely insulting. No, since the day I met you, you've already like had, you've already looked this way. Like you've always looked this way. You've always looked filled and hair done. Thank you. It's very, I don't know what your parents look like, but it works.

I don't either. No, it's just, I just moisturize, vitamin C. Like I just take care of my skin, my face. That's it. I's it. That's it. I've given up on skincare. I also like, I, on this podcast, like a few weeks ago I said soap is a scam and people got really upset.

They really? Yes. Wait, like bar of soap? Like all soap. Not all soap. I know not, hashtag not all soap. By the way. Hashtag all soaps matter.

Okay? Like. Like I, I just think that we over wash and there's too many products being thrown at us. It's like, you just need, and you don't need soap every time. This is just my political statement. I'm on board with it.

I totally understood what you were saying, which is like you're over stripping your skin. Exactly. And I think that like- You want a little bit of your bacteria. Some of it. Yeah. Yeah, you want your flora to thrive.

Yeah. But I think why people were mad was not the soap thing. It was the not showering for 10 days. Oh. Yeah, there's that. Yeah. Yeah. When you start naming the bacteria. Yeah.

Yeah. And petting them and feeding them. But they're so special. Look at my little cruder cooter. No, no, thank you. No, but I do bathe regularly for legal reasons. Because I'm a role model to my child now. What's the longest you've gone without a shower?

I don't know. Like, we should, it's not that crazy. Like I just, I do prefer baths. I'm not leaning more into showers in the summer, but you know, I'll bathe a couple of times a week. I'll definitely do that. I'm just not an everyday needs to be. Yeah.

A couple, a few, three to four, it depends what's going on. Am I just bed rotting for three days? Then I don't need a shower, okay? Okay, silence, I've been met by silence. I think a lot of people do relate to it. They maybe were not in the comments, but I've heard that many times.

And I'm like Euclid, which I think is also another type of mental illness, which is you can too. It is, I am the extreme end of it, which is also not okay, which is like I shower too much. And I don't think that's good for my skin either because I like really hot water I do love hot water shower. I'm like like three times a day. No way Yeah, and I cannot sleep if unless like if I've let's suppose I've had a really long day I fall asleep at 930 p.m. I will get up at midnight to shower and make sure that I'm like fully in my routine or else

nightmares nightmares nightmares Yeah, but it's it is a mental how do we solve this like how do we solve nightmares in general is there a way I'm like not doing well your head. I do I think I'm like not doing well. You're having nightmares? Do you have a lot of nightmares? I do, I think I'm like high stress. I think like the life changes I'm going through, it's like a lot. Are they real life nightmares or are they like, oh, you know, like so absurd that. That's hard to answer.

Cause mine is always like end of the world, like zombies, like post-apocalyptic, lots of chasing and murder and gore. That those are my nightmares. Wow, I'm not leaning that way. I though a lot of like, a recurring one, not recently, but like a lot of like, where you're on the plane and it's going down.

Do you guys ever have that? Oh yeah. I've had a couple of those. That means good luck. Don't you hate it when people say shit like that? Isn't it the worst? Like, oh no, like I had a dream, my teeth all fell out. That means money's coming your way. You know what that is.

That's untrue. No, it's terrifying. If you were to tell my mom, my Filipino mom that, that your teeth are falling out, she would tell you go straight to the sink, gargle, wash it out, because it means death. Take seven baths, yeah. Yeah, it's death.

Teeth falling out is death. I think a boat passing by is death. I'm like, okay, that's... I'm so sick of Yeah, it's death. Teeth falling out is death. I think a boat passing by is death. I'm like, okay, that's... I'm so sick of like, it's like, cause people will say these one things, like you're saying, or it could be like a negative thing, like, well, now you have to go do this. You're like maybe giving someone OCD.

Like that's the, which maybe is what your mom did to you. Totally. Like, and same, like it just, cause then my brain will like hang on to it And then I'm like or like chain letters remember those Remember those I'm so how old am I for saying the sentence remember those chain letters, but like if you don't know Someone explain them Justin. Well, it was like you would get a letter and it was like send this to five people And if you don't you'll die

And you're like ten years old and you're like, oh God. They still exist though, like on Instagram. Yeah, on Instagram, on TikTok, on Facebook. The youngins are always, like my niece and nephew, it's always like, post the last picture of your camera or else, like bad luck all summer. I'm like, I can't afford bad luck all summer and I don't wanna post that.

It's very stressful. But I was thinking about the opening sequence to Mommy Dearest because it's just a day ending in Y. Wait, the ice bath on her face? Yeah, I was thinking that for you. She has the water and she's pouring it on the ice and she dips her face in the ice cubes. I was like, I could do that.

I wish that that movie was just the opening sequence and then follow that through line. Like her self care, Joan Crawford's like, a 1950s movie star self care is, I wanna drink that up. She puts her face in an ice bath. She just does like all these like classic star. Just like the hardest bristle of a brush

and just dig under her fingers. Just like, ah. Yeah, just losing it. Like has like a seven nozzle steam shower and she's just like, oh, it's the best. Like that, that's how, if I could be, I would, but it's really hard because it is about a woman abusing children, but it's like

that first three minutes, that's something to aspire towards heaven. Because it has a color palette, it has like, it reminds me of like these, that trend that I'm seeing now where people are decorating inside of their fridges. What? No.

Yes. What? It's just another room in the house now. Yeah, it's just. It's interior decor before your fridge. Fridge aesthetic. What did we do? I want to do it.

Well, you can have like a Bridgerton themed fridge. How? Don't get me started. I know, I'm like do it. You can like, well you can have like a Bridgerton themed fridge. How? Don't get me started. I know, I'm like, ugh. But like, you have like antiques in your fridge and like live herbs and flowers and you just make the inside of your fridge cute. I needed to do research and I actually kind of know

what the perfect hot girl fridge is and it's like, it's like random jars that have been repurposed with the labels, like, they've torn off, obviously, obviously, and then like, it has like, carrot sticks in water, celery sticks in water, like in different jars. Not pickled? No. No, no, no.

And then it's just like, very obviously empty, there's a lot of blank space. Like Taylor. Yeah. And then there's gotta be some refrigerated supplements right okay, cuz like you're not if you're if you don't have supplements in your fridge You're ugly like go check your fridge. I don't know if I have any in my fridge I was talking about symbiotic stuff like probiotic. Okay. Yeah, usually you're like Yeah, you need like sea monkey water

Yes, you need H Sea Monkey water in there or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Must be lost, yeah. Yes, yes, yes. You need Hailey Bieber's like bacteria, yeah. Wait, did you see like Gary Brekka has a smoothie at Erewhon now? What, yes. Wait, what is it? It's just his amino complex and a bunch of like other things. I need you to tell me who Gary Brekka is.

Yeah, me too. Wait, really? I don't know who that is. Who is it? Is it somebody like I should. Yeah, me too. I really I don't know who that is Who is it? Is it somebody like I should know is it embarrassing? I know I don't know I think she's like I think I'm like, are you seeing a bodybuilder? Cuz you know all these like tough men know they're not he's not he's just a guy who he's just a guy He's a biologist, but he's sort of a really good like marketing guy Okay, like he's taking concepts that aren't necessarily new, but he goes on like,

Rogan and he goes on all these shows and he's basically telling us, if you wanna know one good snapshot of your health, you need to take this one test. But he sells a lot of products along the way and now he is just as relevant as Hailey or Sabrina Carpenter, because she has her short and sweet smoothie.

Of course. At Erewhon. Yes, it's actually better than the Hailey. What? What does that mean? You're like, finally. Finally someone took the crown off of Hailey. I honestly agree.

I haven't tried it. I never liked the Hailey. I love the Hailey. I like pop stars owning shit. I like, I don't want someone, I like pop stars owning shit. I'm so tired of people just being famous because like their mom is. I'm just like, what is it that you do successfully? If I had like curls on right now, they'd make that up.

I want that for you. What is it that you do? Like, you don't get to be famous just because your parents were. I think Haley aesthetically is the most, the smoothie is the most like, oh, I want that on a hot summer day. The strawberry drizzle.

But the flavor profile doesn't hit me quite. Well, it is all looks. You're not wrong. Like the Haley one is all about. Just like Haley. Yeah. It's all looks because the actual smoothie, you taste it and you're like,

this is just a strawberry banana smoothie. And like maybe I'm getting a lick of strawberry syrup, but like what, that's not healthy. What is the flavor profile of Sabrina? How is it good? There's coconut cream, it's blue, it has spirulina. Okay. I'm pretty sure that's what makes it blue, right?

Is a spirulina. And it almost has like this pomegranate thing on top, but it is not as sweet. And there's actually like, you can taste different flavors versus just being like, oh, that's strawberry. Really? It's called short and sweet. I like it.

You want to impress me with a smoothie. That's what it looks like. Don't use banana. And I know that's very anti the show, but like- I wore this shirt. I don't know. A banana is a cheat code to a good smoothie. Like you're, this is, I have the same theory.

Because it just has that sugar in it already. It's got, you shake, it's sugar, creaminess. Fantastico. It's everything that like makes a smoothie good. Like give me an amazing creamy sweet smoothie without a banana, I'm impressed. I have the same feeling about like a restaurant that like has great burgers or great fries.

I'm like, they're all good enough. But if a restaurant can do like amazing broccolini or like. Same, I'm like, they're all good enough. But if a restaurant can do amazing broccolini or like- Same, I love that. Broccolini, I absolutely, broccolini, how can you fuck up broccolini? Okay, fair. But make broccolini taste like french fries or make Brussels sprouts taste-

Make it like crispy broccolini. Brussels sprouts is a little bit tougher to make you know well I think that's what I'm saying It's like if I'm spending my money if I'm getting in my car and driving there like make something healthy good Don't like I just am so over like pizza. I get it great pizza is amazing, but it's not impressing me that much I don't know am I wrong. It don't impress me. I know you should I over here. Give me the Shania look You think you can make a pizza

Documentary changed my life by the way the Shania one yeah, so good you realize how late in life She actually became Shania. I love that yeah, I'm really I'm getting late in life, and I need to become something new so I need We're talking about broccolini I need to become something new. So I need. We're talking about broccolini on the podcast. You're like, let's get lit you guys. I like crispy broccolini. But I think the Shania love story is like the ultimate,

like whoa. With Mutt? With Mutt. So they basically did like a partner swap where the man that she was with who helped her become or become Shania who she was with for what her become or become Shania who she was with for what, like over a long, long time, cheated with another woman.

And guess who Shania eventually married and who she is still with now, that woman's husband. That's gorgeous. Revenge. Right? That's gorgeous. And I mean, better looking too. Yeah. Cause Mutt was kind of a Mutt.

Are they two, are the two? Mutt was like, I mean, when your name's Mutt, it's like. better looking too. Yeah. Cause Mutt was kind of a Mutt. Are they two, are the two? Mutt was like, I mean, when your name's Mutt, it's like. It's hard. Yeah. It's a hard road ahead. Yeah. Does not have probiotics in the fridge. Are they still together, the alternate couple?

I don't think so, right? That would be something to pair with. I don't think so either, yeah. I don't think they're, I don't think they lasted, but Shania did. Yeah. Still the one I'll run to. I can't really know, I don't know they lasted, but Shania did. Yeah. Still the one I'll run to. I can't really know, I don't know if I'm hallucinating

if this is like someone in my family, like a great grandma or something, where like the husband died and then she married the brother. But I think that's common, right? Is that like, I think that's like a everyone's family. Yeah, wartime. I think that's like a- Yeah, that's like haunted mansion shit.

It's like from the 19th. I was gonna say like a Natalie Portman movie. I was like, was that? Yes, it was. I think that's like a- Yeah, that's like haunted mansion shit. It's like- It's like from the 19th. I was gonna say like a Natalie Portman movie. I was like, was that? Yes, it was. It was, right? And it's related to, it was called Brothers, and it was about people who were in the war.

Oh, right! And he came back, and she was like, ah! Yeah, that was a good movie. It was a wartime. Yeah. Okay, I can't imagine being attracted to my partner's brother or family member. It's tough, yeah.

Wait, you've been there? No. I'm like, it was really hard. But we did. Back in the civil war. After Dave's brother died, Dave and I did lock eyes and decide that this was what made sense. Wait, is that something you do clock though

when you're with someone and you finally meet their family and you're like, oh, this was the ugly sibling. Do you acknowledge it and just let that thought die and never say it out loud? Or do you share it with a friend and say, ooh, like the brother was actually surprised? Well, I have a hot brother. Wait, you have a hot brother? Yeah, no, like all my siblings are very attractive,

but my youngest brother, Paul, everybody's like, and I'm like, well, he gets it from me. Like I always have to like turn it about me. I'm like, well, yeah, you know, I'm the youngest brother, Paul. Everybody's like, and I'm like, well, he gets it from me. Like I always have to like turn it about me. I'm like, well, yeah, you know, I'm the oldest. He's the youngest. So yeah, cause he's like tatted up. He's got like sleeves, long hair, dark skin. He's got like a stash and he's like a diver.

You're like, I'm the blue. Wait, how old is he? Uh oh, wait, I'm taken, but how old is he? He's like, he's in his thirties. Yeah. Okay. I never want to meet him is he? He's like, he's in his 30s, yeah. Okay. Yeah. I never want to meet him. Yeah, yeah.

I never want to meet him. He's like half Hispanic. Oh. Are you? Do you want to see? No, I'm Hispanic by marriage. Show it to me on this eye. So they're my half siblings.

Just this eye. How many do you have? I have three siblings. Yeah, you'll- He's a diver. But he's married, so there's that too. Yeah, thank God. Also just tat up an arm and I'm in. Wait, really? Well, yeah.

I'm kind of anti. Not as much, but about five years ago, if you were ugly and put a sleeve on it. Are you gonna? Oh. Who's he? I just need to know his Instagram. Okay, got it.

I'll remember. She'll memorize that too. Beat it underscore nerd, I'll never forget it. That's crazy. He's gonna have all these followers, when this comes out, he's gonna be like, what the hell's happening? Your brother truly is a Latin man.

That is so cool. And then Don is. Yeah, he's a hottie. Wow, yeah, he's a hottie. Okay, now we've moved on from this, but I do need to go back and stir up controversy for just a quick second. Okay, let's go I tell me you've ever had a pizza that is better Than just a good old tombstone frozen pizza with cheese and pepperoni

Oh like at a restaurant like is there really a pizza that's that much better than a frozen pizza a good frozen pizza Mm-hmm. I just that's all that better than a frozen pizza, a good frozen pizza. I just, that's all, that's all. I think pizza is- Mic drop. So subjective because if you were to ask me my favorite pizza ever, it has to do with nostalgia and not the actual quality of- Oh my God, Pizza Hut lunch buffet.

For me, it's this thing called Mas Pizza. It literally is like, I don't even think they put real cheese on it. It's from the Philippines. You buy it by the slice and they give you one piece of like old ham. And the smell of it, the smell of like whatever synthetic thing they're putting there, it drives me wild.

It lights me up on the inside and I will eat that all day long. You're so right that nostalgia overpowers everything and can make things in the world so misleading. Like cause here I am, maybe it's just nostalgia that I think Tombstone is so good. Well, I mean, that's when everyone's happy. It's like, that's why the nineties are back and like the, the early two thousands and like music is, I feel like finally going into this era, like every song, if you listen to

every song right now, it's all, there is a sample of a song in it. Sabrina Carpenter, her song Taste with Jenna Ortega has Seven Wonders from Fleetwood Mac in it. And I'm like, oh, that's why I like it because it just has that like- Familiarity. Familiarity.

I'm like, why do I like this? I'm like, oh, she sampled Stevie Nicks. And I'm like, and I love Stevie Nicks. And that's why I probably like familiarity. I'm like, why do I like this? I'm like, oh, she sampled Stevie Nicks and I'm like, and I love Stevie Nicks and that's why I probably like her. Weight loss solutions are not one size fits all. Everyone deserves to have a weight loss plan that's tailored to their specific needs. So if you are struggling with losing weight and need extra help, it's time you check out HRS. HRS is changing women's healthcare by providing access to GLP-1 weekly injections with the same active ingredient as Ozempic and WeGubby, as well as oral medication kits. Weight loss by HRS is realistic, not restrictive, and is focused on giving you access to the

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You guys, I'm so psyched to be talking about Skims as always, but today we're telling you about the Skims bras. Okay? My favorite is the Skims Wireless Form T-shirt bra. This bra has no wire, but yet somehow gives me all the benefits from like the old, you know, wired bras I used to wear when I thought I was young and cool. I'm too much of a comfortable person now to wear those, but I want some support. I want some shape.

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Um, like not a lot. What America did you grow up in? Not my America. Wait, frozen pizza? Not your America. Yet I haven't had a lot of frozen pizza. I've had, you know, slices from places, but not a whole lot of frozen food, I don't think. By the way, we always got tombstone,

but I remember like when you, you know when you're a kid and you go to a friend's house whole lot of frozen food, I don't think. By the way, we always got tombstone, but I remember like when you, you know when you're a kid and you go to a friend's house and then like their food, it's like, oh my God, your parents are on crack. Like you guys have ramen noodles. Like I remember discovering, and then I remember also like the fancier, like the DiGiorno.

DiGiorno was so good. Having that at someone else's house is like absolute the greatest. That's how I feel about like canned ravioli. Like Chef Boyardee is one of the greatest meals I'll ever have. I agree, SpaghettiOs. I've never really gone to SpaghettiOs.

Justin, join me. Join me. Now it's trash, turn the music. I, oh, no, I was like, I, okay. I can get, mine was the top ramen in the bags that were like four cents a bag, like those. Double up on those. I wish I could say the name of my favorite flavor,

but it would get me canceled. Wait, what, for top ramen? No regular ramen. Have you guys all converted to like the newer stuff, right? Like Bull Duck. No. The Carbonara one. What is this?

Oh gosh, it's like a whole new world. What do we do? How do we? Simon ramen. It's like a whole new world. What do we do? How do we? Simon, ramen. It's a ramen that you get at the store? Yeah, so like the flavors now, like they've, we're done with the, I can say it, the orientals.

Okay. The orientals. The noodles, the noodles. The blue noodles. We can let that go now because what's out there truly is like next level. Yeah. Okay, I'll need some links.

Time has passed. Yeah. You know what mine was? Was the chili lime. I like that one. That's fancy. The chili lime. Never the shrimp.

No one's buying the shrimp. You ever go to the store? I have eaten the shrimp. Yeah, we've all had it, but no one's like, like there's always boxes of just the shrimp at the store. Yeah, no one wants that one. It's so weird to me though that like this food is obviously like highly processed.

It was, I remember, 10 cents a pack. It's so cheap. So bad for you, but like so delicious. Not nostalgia. And nostalgia. I remember making like ramen noodles, like as a kid watching Saturday Night Nickelodeon. My parents went out to get drunk on a date.

You know, and we had a babysitter and she's talking to her boyfriend on my landline. You know, and it was just like, it was like the coolest thing. And then my parents would come home and they'd be like, hey. And I was like, oh, they had fun. And we were all in a good mood.

Like my dad paid the babysitter and then like we went to bed and it was fun. Yeah. And I got in trouble for eating two packets of ramen because I would double them up because I didn't think there was enough noodles in just one. Well, you're tall. You're a big person.

And then we would get like Little Caesar's pizza, which I was like, oh. We got that a lot too. I loved it. I didn't. But pizza how for- Slams every time. Pizza had Supreme all day. I loved it. I did it but pizza out for I say I am every time speech on supreme

Did the shaky's thing no cuz I think that's California. Yeah What he's came before Pizza Hut so I have a very big nostalgia for shaky What is shaky's like what's your order when you walk into a shaky? It's it's just in case I accidentally fall into one later. Wait, there is a shaky nearby here. They're everywhere. They close the one in West Hollywood. Oh yeah. Oh yeah.

And I always just thought that was like a billboard to wish people happy birthday. I know, that's all I think about it. It was like every time I drove by, they'd be like, happy birthday Wanda. And I'm like, oh, get it bitch. And I don't even know Wanda, but like. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha.

Ha ha ha. Are you, cause you're like a SoCal original, did you go to like, Kukuru? Or like, soup plantation? Yeah, soup plantation, yes. Kukuru's coming back. I think soup plantation is too. Can we say that?

I don't know. I don't know what they're going to change up at Soup Plantation, but I think the crappiness of it is what made it worth going to. Right? It's like you didn't like, what was it, that Boston Market? I never did Boston Market. Can I tell you the weirdest phenomenon about Boston Market though? Every time for as long, many years I went there,

every time, the macaroni and cheese would taste really good for three bites and then it turned disgusting and I don't know why. Cause it's like sponge. What about your spinach? It's just like sponge. Like it just, after three bites, I was like, this is repulsive, but I always got it

If I hear is there like a hotline I can call for this Okay, yeah, I correct Stella, but also I love it I love it where ace was born what about hospital Yeah, so there used to be a Boston market diagonal from there Oh, that would have been a really great after birth meal. Correct. Wow, I missed out. I was born in the wrong century. But like obviously the chicken was amazing, the mashed potatoes. The spinach. I never got the spinach.

I never went green when I was a child. Oh. Never. When did broccolini start? Broccolini started like five years ago. That's actually this year for me. That's like postpartum. Yeah, postpartum broccoli. They're also performing Cucuccella next year.

Postpartum broccoli. How are you doing on your organ journey? Okay, so I- You're eating organs now. No, I'm not, but I'm building up. Can I have yours? No. Please?

We need to do a trade off. You promised. You got to make it to the show. You promised. I need your kidneys. Wait, there's a smoothie at Erewhon that's with organs. Yes, so I'm wondering about that. It must be the powder, right? Like, they crack open the capsule, which when I first heard of that, I was like grossed out.

But the powder, the capsule's fine, whatever. But they're not putting like straight chicken liver in there or anything. Although. Would be good, though. Like, now that I've discovered I have high cholesterol, I'm like, do I need to cut back on organ desiccation? We need to have Gary Brekka on here to really explain.

Seriously. Stella, can you book us like a cholesterol expert? Cause I don't, my health insurance is sick of me. I felt so much better when you called me about your cholesterol. Really? Cause I have the exact same issue. Do you really?

So my HDL is very high, which makes me not as concerned that my LDL is a little elevated as well. Mine are all high. Your triglycerides are good though, I saw. Okay. She sends me her. She's a part of my care team. How's your cholesterol?

High cholesterol team. How's your cholesterol? I don't know. I look good, I'm fine. Yeah, no. I need to go get, I definitely need to go to a doctor like probably in January. Just because I just, I go get, I definitely need to go to a doctor like probably in January. Just cause I just, I'm like, I'm fine.

I'll go for a walk. Get your yearly physicals. Like I feel like I do skip years here and there, but then whenever I do it, I feel good about it. Like, let's do like slugs, get their yearly physical. Justin will lead the way. Yeah, let's do it. How many, what percentage of slugs have high cholesterol?

If you have low cholesterol, you can't listen anymore. You're not, we're not for you. And we're a young pod. Yeah, we're young with high cholesterol. Young, hot, broccolini crowd. Wait, I was gonna ask you guys, what is the one food that's make it break it for you? If you have it and it's bad, you're like,

I'm never coming back here again. Or like- At any restaurant. Any restaurant that you go to and you're like, you love say mac and cheese, like you said. Like if you went to a place and it had shitty mac and cheese, would you just be like, I'm done? Like what's the one food item

that you love getting every time and you know how it's supposed to taste and you know how it's supposed to feel texture wise? Honestly, like a chopped salad. Oh. Because, and those are hard to nail, believe it or not, but like an Italian chopped salad, when done right, I will move mountains to repeat that experience.

And I have. What is the ratio? The ratio, the dressing. Is the dressing super fresh? Is it finely chopped? Is there the right? Are you into finely chopped? Yes.

Or do you like bigger chunks? Finely chopped. Okay. Okay. Finally chopped. Got it, got it. Look at the panic in her eyes. The right meats, the right cheeses,

the right lettuces, radicchio. Like it has to be like bitter and. Pepperchini? Yes! Of course! How I'm. The right cheeses the right lettuces radicchio like it has to be like bitter and pepper Cheney. Yes In fact there was the perfect chopped salad at a restaurant in Hollywood called Delancey Which is like right where the old Arby's was all right, which also closed by the way. I know Yes, nothing survives there because it's like a war zone basically. But at one time it was peaceful. Whenever was that area peaceful? When I was getting my chopped salads there was peace.

It was like a Wild West set. Like is that where it is? That weird Wild West? No, it's a little, it's like near there. A little further east I think. But that is a really rough corner. But then I have this perfect chopped salad, now the place is closed, I can never recreate it

because I don't have artistic skill in that way. But then I go and I try to get a chopped salad other places, it's fucking disgusting, and I'm like, it ruins, it hurts every fiber of me. I don't know. You just flip the bowl, and it's like, oh my God. I scream, like, you'll be closed in six weeks. Yeah, why am I trapped?

Why am I trapped? What about yours? Do you have one? I mean, it's not as interesting, but if I go to anyone's home or restaurant. Wait, you found that interesting? I did. I did.

I think you're right. I think you're right about a chopped salad. I do think there are layers to the game. There's levels to it because it is more than just what's in it. It's the size,, I do think there are layers to the game. There's levels to it because it is more than just what's in it, it's the size. And I do think the ratio is important, which controversial take.

I don't think that overstuffed sandwiches are the better sandwiches. There are places where it's almost, there's just too much in it and people think that's the place to go to. And I don't, I think ratio is everything. Can I name names? Yes.

Like sals, fat sals. Overindulgent, I don't get it either. I'm like, I'm sorry, we get Dave and Buster's, what is this? It's for drunk people late at night. That's the conclusion I've had to come to. But here's the, there's two types of people. People who think that, oh, they will tell you,

oh, you have to eat here, it's really good. And when you go there, it's just big servings. Yeah. And it's big, big servings and they get bang for their buck And then there are people who are like here eat here and it's a smaller but properly portion Very high on flavor You're so right that and I will admit that I personally have been victim to Believing a food is better due to a big serving size like I am not I think we've all been there

Yeah, wait, what were you gonna say when I cut you off though about like when you go to someone's house No, it's very simple and I'm looking right at Stella when I say this like if you don't know how to cook rice I will never trust you Okay again. Yeah, then you know what Tell me right now how to cook rice. Okay, I will. Tell me right now in broad daylight. There's only one way to do it. By a rice cooker.

It will do it for you. It will do the math for you. Stella, if you fuck up a rice cooker rice, I think you're in trouble. Okay, but what if I think that you're just under watering everything every time. Cause it seems as though I saw the rice. That is the rudest thing you could say to someone. You're under watering everything, every time. Cause it seems as though I saw the rice. That is the rudest thing you could say to someone.

You're under watering everything. Under watering. Because with a rice cooker. Your skin is dry. Your plants are dead. You can't grow a broccolini. Because the rice cooker will do, even if you add too much water in a rice cooker,

it will steam it out and fix it for you. So it kind of corrects your mistakes. So I think your mistake is that you just are not- It's like a vagina self-cleaning? It kind of is. Self-correcting? We already know our vaginas don't self-clean. They've stopped self-cleaning.

It's really sad. I know. Sorry, Justin. Not like this. Okay, here's my like hyper anxiety brain bone to pick with the rice cooker. Do you know what I'm gonna say? Mm-mm.

It's Teflon. They're all Teflon. It's true. And look, do I have Teflon? Do I have toxins? Hell yes I do. Let's take my all clad bowls, I mean pots, and I'll show you how to do the finger method.

I'll show you how to do it. It's even easier than a rice cooker. Okay. It's fine. It's just a ratio. I know the finger method and it hasn't worked for me. I did the finger method once in high school, never looked back. I was like, no, nothing says it's a different.

But I mean, I guess if I go to a restaurant and the rice is not a certain way, I'm out. Do you like it like a little crunch or no? Like an al dente rice? It depends what kind of rice. Lovey and perfect. Yeah, different rice have different, like there's so many different kinds.

What's the go-to? You have long and separated, you have sushi rice, which is like, you know. Yeah, short. Yeah. Short and complicated. There's Calrose, there's Jasmine, there's long grain, there's just so many different kinds.

I love the Uncle Ben's rice. The, what are they, you know what I'm talking about? The microwavable orange packs. Yeah, the separated rice. Yeah, it is good. It's really good. I love all rice, but yeah, that is my make or break. What's yours?

See, mine is, mine is salsa. Oh! The perfect answer. Mine is salsa. You've done this before? I mean, I was thinking about it the other day, you know, because it's like, I grew up in Texas,

my mom would make fresh pico de gallo. I make a badass pico de gallo, which is, and I feel like if you go to a Mexican restaurant, the minute the salsa, first of all, have chips and salsa readily available. And unlimited. Unlimited, give me chips and salsa readily available. And, and unlimited, unlimited. Give me chips and salsa at all times.

I want to fill myself up with chips and salsa before my meal comes. I would rather sit on the floor, like rip the booths out, sell those, give me free chips and salsa. Absolutely. Absolutely. I don't need to be comfortable. If that salsa is terrible, I know the food's going to suck. I think you're right.

Absolutely. I mean, I feel like we could solve this Presidential election with a salsa cook-off Kamala makes hers Trump makes his and whoever has the best salsa wins Tour America. Yeah. Yeah, I mean Trump's will probably be like gold ketchup packets in a bowl and we like no it's salsa It's the best salsa. We're like it's Yeah, it's but but like- You do? Yeah, I feel like- With Trump salsa?

It's a little bit like, No. Almost like, you know, and that can screw you up. But she's well researched. Kamala's gonna have flavor. Yeah, cause she's part Indian. It's gonna be Indian,

it's gonna be Jamaican, little jerk in there. It's gonna be good. The only thing that will hurt her with her salsa is if it's warm. I hate warm salsa. Temperature warm. I love a good heat.

I hate like warm salsa. But what about room temp? Room temperature, not... Not like a, I don't know. I don't like, not cold. Maybe like a room temp. Not like, I hate when it's like hot salsa. I think you're being insane, actually.

Why? I think warm hot salsa is like, you know the blender just heated it up, like it's, or the tomatoes were just freshly roasted. Like, I think you're, you're like trash for this. This is low class. What? Why, because I don't like hot salsa?

Yes, I think salsa's shit. I like hot, I like spice. I heard you. Yes, yes. I heard you. You just don't agree with my temperature. It's really hard to find a hot salsa. Because they're gross. Who's trash now?

You're the only one, you're like, it's really hard. Are you scourging the city? Hey guys, it's Esther. Here's my top 10 places for hot salsa. I hope you have a lot of travel miles. Oh, but seriously, I think like if you're a Mexican restaurant, have a good salsa. I like a little bit of garlic as well.

Sure. Good garlic. Amen, sister. I just don't like a, I don't want it to be marinara sauce. Yeah, that's, you know what else? Like chunks of onions are really good for me in a salsa. I just don't like a, I don't want it to be marinara sauce. Yeah, that's, you know what else, like chunks of onions are really good for me in a salsa. I want chunky. Yeah, chunky.

Don't blend it. Like guacamole when it's like mush is so nasty. Like I want it like thick and fluffy and chunky. Yeah. It's a different experience. That's what guys say about me. But there's nothing more bougie and like high class that makes you feel like you were like

in the Gilded Age when they have like a guac person come over to the table. That is, but I feel like that's a gimmick. Of course it is, but for a minute there I'm just like, ahahaha. And they're like, they're like mixing it up at the table and like mashing up the avocados. I'm like, I am rich. Who invented that? Like what, do we know, like is there an origin story for the table side guac?

Cause it is so, you're right, that's the most luxurious experience I've ever had. Yeah. It's so- Mix it at the table. And then you don't, I don't see that anywhere anymore. If you go to- Asians have been doing that for years,

by the way, with Parachi, I just wanna say, where it's like a performance. But that's really just grilling meat. Yeah. And it's veggies. And then they turned it into a Benihana. Which by the way, Steve Ioki's family owns. Really? Did I know that? I only learned that very recently. What came first, like Steve Ioki or Benihana family? Benihana family. Right, okay, so he's just like a nepo baby at this point.

Legacy. Legacy, yeah. He's a legacy hire. Yeah. And I think that they just opened like an elevated Benihana. Shit, what are we doing here? They're calling it something different, but I do wanna try.

Where is it, is it in Vegas? I think it might be in Hawaii. I'm going there be in Hawaii. Ah, I'm going there next week, or no, I'm going there on Saturday. Wait, let me know, wait, wait. I'm like, of course I know. Send us a postcard. Wait, do you know which island it is? Oahu.

I'm going, I will go, I'm putting it in the itinerary. I will totally go for you and give you like a full. She was drooling, thinking about it. I'll do a whole Yelp review for you. And tell me how much better it is than the regular Benihana experience. Does, okay, I thought we saw, I've never had Benihana,

cause when I was living near one, I was very not an adventurous eater, but I always thought of Benihana as fancy. Is that just cause I'm like white trash or, oh, conversation over. Yeah. But is it- Take a seat, worms off.

Is it not good, Benihana? Is that not a starting? It's fun if like you're a kid and you're like, they do these, all these tricks for you. It's like a fun experience. But if you're going there for like, you know- Delicious. Yeah, it's just very-

It's not bad, it's fine. And they have like the rice and they toss all the rice on the thing. It's really fun. The only thing, it's gonna make me sound like such an asshole is I hate looking at the people across from me cause I'm having a blast and I'm with my friends and then I look over and you're like,

and you see like the family from like, you know, Ohio or something and they're like sweating and they've got their shorts on, shout out Ohio. But like, you know what I mean? Like, and they're, and they're just like, just like toad people and then they're like- Having their cultural experience. Right, and it's just one big ass table

that you're all sharing. And you're like, I don't know these people. You call them toad people. It is a little too intimate to share, of an experience to share with tourists from Ohio. And then you have that one person who just gets really excited at the onion ring tower. And they're like, ah, ha, ha.

And you're like, are you okay? Like, calm down. I think that it is still fun though. Okay. I know when Bobby and I used to just go just for the sake of, you know, like, well, but there's a bunny Hana here. Like why not?

You know? Where is it? Where? I think they only have them in like Ontario now. Like, you know, the Rancho Cucamongs, right? Those areas. Gentrified. What's it called Stella? We literally can't find, any of us can find it.

Oh my God, it's so bougie. It's a secret underground bunny hunt. I know, it's a speakeasy bunny on a- It's Steve Aoki. I think it's called Iokis. Yeah, that's the only thing I can find. It's like Ioki tepe. Yeah.

I think it's tepe. That's a- No, there's more to it. Is it just like a rave when you go, oh my God, that'd be fun. I've never been, you'll have to tell me. I'm gonna go check it out. Okay, Aoki Teppanyaki.

Okay, there you go, Aoki Teppanyaki. And it's in Oahu? Um. The Hilton Hawaiian Village in Wakihi. Wikes, yeah. And then we are going to, I'm just like texting. Yours new nails.

Click, click, click, click. What are y'all watching? Ooh, right now, Secret Lives of Marvin Martin. Of the Mormons? Yeah. I know, you are seriously, I wanna say, the 10th person this week who has been like, are you watching?

I've been getting DMs watch I'm getting DMS I'm getting like people are like are you watching this get into it and I think I will start what network I will Starting with you. Okay, Hulu. I'm going um I I think everyone's loving it a lot more than me. Okay Yeah, I mean I I do watch a lot of like the Real Housewives I've I it's so weird you don't know this about me, but I actually do follow reality TV like pretty closely That is weird. It is weird doesn't match the look, but I do that's fine But cuz you're very like you're get you're like Monica from

Salt Lake has anybody told you that that she kind of looked like Monica from do I really she was not reality von T's She's the one who married her grandfather? No, different lady from Salt Lake. But she's the one who was on for one season and she like came in, I loved her. And it turned out that she had like a, what's it called, like a Finsta account. But it was like trashing all of them.

She was like a troll account. I love that. And they fired her and I thought she was fantastic. Wait, they fired her for having a Finsta? Yeah. No, for trashing everyone, which is like, wait. Isn't that part of the culture of Real Housewives? Don't they want that?

Well, it gave them a great season, a great season. I'm calling bullshit that that's not why she was fired because that's like just, I've heard, we heard from Kathy Griffin that like They the producers like you better start shit or your yeah, it's like she probably just didn't do enough Oh, she was great though. She was like a single mom. She like four kids and I loved her She was like young too And I think that's what was is that all the other women were kind of like about her. Who gives a shit?

It's a troll account Oh with a Mormon wives thing I mean, yes It is a different take because they're trying to modernize their religion via this these girls But who are a part of this group called mom talk, right and basically what it is, it's like they're more open about sex They're more open about like alcohol and like, you know, just generally being human open about like alcohol and like, you know, just generally being human. But there's still so much weird cherry picking

when it comes to, yes, we like, one girl's like, oh, like I'm gonna promote this like vibrator brand. And then it's like no to drinking. Like no to drinking, no Pepsi, no Coca-Cola. But yeah, like I can, you know, say fuck and all that kind of stuff and cuss like a sailor and you're like, wait a minute. But I will say what I love the most is that

they're so messy and they are, I love when religion shows its face where it's like, yes, you are just, you're the same kind of pigs we are. Yeah. But they have different addictions too. Like they might not be drinking soda and booze, but they found loopholes.

So yeah, laughing gas. So when they all go to get Botox, they all have their little laughing gas parties. Which is not a thing. I feel like that's going to be me. Like I'm going to be sober, but I'll get like an epidural every once in a while. That's exactly who I thought about.

I was like, wait, Esther's sort of following this Mormon trajectory of finding loopholes without drinking alcohol. Yeah, yeah, I just have, that's what they do. They keep having babies to get their epidural high. Oh, interesting. So weird. It's like cutting. It's so weird.

I am, I just start a chimp crazy. Is that the same makeup the Tiger King? Yes. Yes. I recommended it to Sarah Tiana. She was on stage last night. She goes off on the whole show like on stage. I was like, I was the one. Remember, I am the one.

I am the blueprint. It's so good. How far are you? Not far enough. Okay. Only like halfway through the second episode. Yeah. So it's like four. And it's like, it gets like kind of, it gets like sad.

It's already very sad. Yeah, you're just kind of like, oh my God, but like it ends great, okay? But like, you're just kind of like, ooh, like these people are just, the something is off. There is a snappage in the medulla oblongata. And so that's a good docu-series to watch.

I loved Perfect Couple. I, I'm at last episode. Have you told Esther about the dance break every episode? Every, so the beginning of the episode is like a mamma mia. There is a flash mob. What? Nicole Kidman is doing a flash mob.

Why? How is that happening? It's so weird, but I like it. I do too. And the is doing a flash mob. Why? How is that happening? It's so weird, but I like it. I do too. And the song is a banger. Meghan Trainor sings it. Love Meghan. Oh, it's so good. I'm actually on, are we watching?

Oh no, it's like are we watching it? I will be recreating it on the beach of Hawaii. That dance, that dance. I think you'll get a lot of easy recruits there. Oh absolutely. It's good. It's a flash mob Esther, come on. With Nicole Kidman.

With Nicole Kidman, Leif Schreiber and Dakota Fanning. We're not worthy of this. I know. Wow. Yeah. I had no idea that like. And that girl Megan from White Lotus. Yes.

Who is the best. Oh I love her. I know. I need to like, she used to be more things so I can remember her name Megan Yeah, yeah, yeah, I can't call her that girl Megan from white lotus and the guy from Midsommar Midsommar no Midsommar is that yeah Wait the Florence Pugh movie Yes, that one. Did you call it Midsommar?

Midsommar? What's the hell is this? Yeah, Midsommar. It's Midsommar. I know, but it's fun to call it Midsommar. Wait, did you really, is that how you pronounce it? I don't know. I think you probably got that from me,

because that's how I pronounce it. No, but it's spelled S-O-M-M-A-R. It's spelled mid and then S-O-M-M-A-R. Yeah, no, that too. But it's Swedish. Just erase that and call it Midsommar, and it's like, no, that's spelled Midsommar. It was really bougie.

Her boyfriend is in that perfect. Oh, yeah. He's the ticket. He's the brother who sleeps with us. Yes. And I was I was like, who was that guy? And you see his D in Midsommar. You do. Yeah. If it was real or not. But yeah, it's great.

And then, of course, Selling Sunset. Oh, I've I've I've watched all of the first season of the OC one. Oh, OC is kind of boring. Yeah. I'm like, like Oppenheim, Sunset, OG. Wait, there's one that I really think you will like love. What? It's Pop Star Academy.

Okay, I watched the first five minutes and was like, these girls look like they're 12 and turned it off, but if I'll go back. Because they're a legit group now. They are? They are, and I only found this out because Jules is like, oh my God, you're watching Cat's Eye? I'm like, what's Cat's Eye?

She's like, those girls. Really? Okay, I'm in. Wait, what is this? I don't know. It's on Netflix, Pop Star Academy. So basically in Korea, there is a machine, right? That is, that creates all of these groups

and they're always gonna make it huge because they just have the perfect formula. There's like 15 of them, pick one. Right, so they've now brought that whole system to America and they've done like a casting of girls from everywhere, from like Belarus to Argentina to Hawaii and they create this group, but then the girls go through like a survival show

which then the fans get to pick which girls make it. Get out of here, it's like Hunger Games pop stars. Yes, but these girls are so incredibly talented but the most talented ones don't always make it. Which is really. So is the moms in the back like. Thank you for the recognition that I will need always make it. Which is really. So is the moms in the back like. Thank you for the recognition that I will need in the future.

Oh yes. One of the girls on there has a dance dad. A dance dad? Like dad was a dancer? Dad, no dad was the one who like pushed her to dance. Dad was the one doing that. The greatest show I've ever seen in my life. I will never, this is my most transformative

experience in TV making the band 3. Danny McCain. Yes, watched all of it. So this is giving me like, oh maybe this has tastes of that show. Except for the weird missions that they sent a lot of like the girls on. But like like, Lori. And when they don't make it, drones fly overhead and shoot them out of the village, yeah. So. Lori and Gibson, shouting and screaming at young dancers on the treadmill, to turn their speed up higher,

that is what built me. Like, I am that, that's my childhood. Then you were like, Pop Star Academy, because it's so technical. And for me, like a so technical and I'm watching it I'm a layman. I'm watching it and I'm like, wow, that was incredible And then you hear him saying that was trash you guys are working hard enough Oh, yeah, yes, yeah, so good broken hips USA. Yeah

Wait, is that the is that the the one who is like her mom was it? Yeah Wait, is that the one who But like I yeah I'm just just for short girls. I don't know that's honestly Kamala is kind of a short girl. She's five five so. Is she a short girl? Kamala Harris is too short to be a Dallas Cowboys cheerleader. Pass it on. We need short girl fall. That's what we need. Because you're right, because they just cannot keep up with a kick line. I disagree. I disagree. Well, no, I think I agree with you, but I'm just saying, I think that's their reasoning, right?

It's because it doesn't look uniform when the girl is down here. That's what we have the Rockettes for. This is an outdated system. Short girls can kick high. It won't, the audience will not be that upset if one girl's, I'm just, I think we should end the show here. Also, you're not gonna like Pop Star Academy then.

I already worried because they're all tall. Because I do think that the favorites are always the taller girls. Of course, always. This is why I'm a fucking comedian and not a ballerina. But I used to think, same in gymnastics, where they used to shit on the tall girls who would Qualify for the Olympics and then point her out and look at how awkward she is because she shouldn't be here She's five five instead of like or 11 really okay, so I'm in the wrong business

You could have been a gymnast damn it, but I was too scared. Yeah, I don't blame you. It's so scary trust However, I will say that gym gymnast are like the Olympics this summer, I was glued. I loved every bulge, every just like muscle in the leg, like guys and girls, like just, I loved it all. And I loved watching the women's and the men's gymnastics because it was just like, how the hell do you do this? Like the one kid who's like blind and had to wear the glasses and did the pommel horse.

I'm like, get out of here. He's on Dancing with the Stars now. I know. So cute. I know, and I really hope he wins. Cause you know, I like a good like blind ballroom. I love a blind samba, you know what I mean? He's not really blind.

He's just cross-eyed a little bit, like me. Well, right, but I'm also like, now take them off and do it. Like, that's what I mean. If you can take your glasses off of the pommel horse, like, do the samba blind or whatever. But like, I was going to say, like, that's what always scares me. It's like, you see these, like, athletes in their shape and they do all that, and then they interview them and they're like, I was gonna say like, that's what always scares me is like, you see these like athletes in their shape and they do all that and then they interview them and they're like, well, how did you think the event went?

They're like, I thought it was really good. You're like, oh no, like what is that? It's like the tiniest like, the tiniest squeakiest voice. You're like, wait, no, oh, the illusion's been ruined. It's so true, haven't you always said this, like a hot person, like they have everything to lose by opening their mouth. This is why I swear to you,

They need to be quiet. dating sites are not for me because a voice is my number one thing. Okay, as straight women, allegedly, are you guys getting, are you guys witnessing and seeing Instagram turning into Craigslist misconnections? No.

Is that like in your algorithms at all? No? No, I wish it was, that sounds so fun. It's literally like, like single dads being like, I'm just looking for a wife for my girls and they don't know where I can find one. And then they'll do like a TikTok trend and I'm like, oh no.

Or like guys being like, why am I always single? I got this empty chair here and my dog in the back of the truck. Hit me up. And I'm just like, is this what we're doing? It's insane insane it's a bold move very bold so not that long ago I dated a guy who I thought was very aesthetically handsome and I think that he hit the marks in terms of like he was

excellent at something which is also one of the things in my criteria you have to be excellent at one thing but I really tried to override my hatred for his voice. And I tried- His rice cooking was incredible though. Yeah. The rice cooking was actually okay. So I was like, check there. And I tried, I was like,

Kaila, don't be shallow, don't be shallow, don't be shallow. But I swear to you, like I was embarrassed for him to open his mouth in front of my friends. Because it just, and I feel really, like just a little measly. But okay, on the flip side, but then I met his brother who would have really,

I didn't meet his brother, but I heard his brother on the phone, deep, beautiful voice. So I'm like, why don't you punch that frog out of your throat, dude? Or go to war and die so I can marry your brother. Yes! All right.

I'm outta here. That's it. We have to go. Justin, where can people see more of you? I'm addicted to you. I'm so lucky I get to see you every single week at the Comedy Store. You always, by the way, whether you bring me up

or I bring you up, after, you always say the funniest shit about me. Oh yes, it's all out of love. I know, it's so good. He roasts me so hard, it's so good. Where can we see you? We love you. Well, you can find me on my podcast called Just Saying. The Just Saying podcast with Justin Mardale.

It's on the Comedy Story Network, iTunes, YouTube. The Just Say It podcast with Justin Bardale. It's on the Comedy Store Network, iTunes, YouTube. And yeah, you can catch me on, as a regular on Jeff Lewis Live on SiriusXM. We love you, Justin. Come back soon. Of course, have fun. Slugs, we'll see you next week with a brand new episode.

And I think I'm gonna be on tour in Austin, so you can get tickets at the link in the description. Well, mommy, she's doing it. I think. That's so sad, thank you. Well, mommy, she's doing it! I think. That's so sad, thank you. You're like, she's so brave. All right, we love you guys, we'll see you next week. We love Justin.

She's so brave. ["The Last Supper"]