TRASHFUTURE - I Identify as a Tech Company ft. Bryan Quinby

Episode Date: October 29, 2019

It's that time again! Bryan Quinby from Street Fight calls in to talk with Riley, Hussein, and Alice about America's favourite real estate company that called itself a tech company and so is psychotically overvalued because it's involved in the giant pyramid scheme that is the SoftBank Vision Fund... and it isn't WeWork. We also talk about a lot of other shit. Check out Street Fight here! https://soundcloud.com/streetfightwcrs We have a Patreon and signing up at the $5 tier will give you an extra episode each week. You’ll also gain access to our incredibly powerful Discord server. Sign up here: https://www.patreon.com/trashfuture If you want to buy one of our recent special-edition phone-cops shirt, shoot us an email at trashfuturepodcast[at]gmail[dot]com and we can post it to you. (£20 for non-patrons, £15 for patrons) Do you want a mug to hold your soup? Perhaps you want one with the Trashfuture logo, which is available here: https://teespring.com/what-if-phone-cops#pid=659&cid=102968&sid=front

Hi, everyone. It's me, your boy, Milo here, and you're probably thinking, why am I hearing my voice? Well, I'm not actually on this episode, but I did produce it because Nate is in New York. So I got to experience the hell that is Nate's life every week. And to be honest, I cannot wait to go back. But Riley asked me to put a little announcement at the start of this episode that if you're looking for the free Comey Book Club episodes, they're available on the Patreon feed, but you don't have to pay to access them. So like if you sign up to Patreon and put the RSS into your podcast app, or just go on Patreon, go on our Patreon page, you can listen to those episodes for free, but you just have to do

it via the Patreon. So if you're into your Comey Book Club, but you're not a patron and you want your free episode, then hit us up on the Patreon page and you can get those for free. Cheers, guys. Okay, one more time. I was thinking Mark there. Sorry. Yeah. So say three, two, one, Mark. And then when you say Mark, everyone clap. Okay. Three, two, one, Mark. Close enough. Yeah. Close enough for government work. Yeah, exactly. Milo Milo can produce it. Welcome to this week's free episode of Trash Future. I'm Riley. You may remember me from all the other previous shows. I'm in here with Hussein on the board. On the boards. On

the boards. I very rarely get to go on the boards. So this is like, yeah, it's like a kid being, getting their dad coming to work, whether you get to come to their dad's work and then they end up accidentally losing like a quarter of a million because they pressed like two buttons on the keyboard. It's a rare Hussein. Yes. Post rare Husseins. Everyone in our Discord, post rare Husseins. I was going to say final thing, like I am actually now on the Discord, so I'm going to like post some stuff. Finally. At last. We also have Alice phoning in from Glasgow. Hello. And we have street fights. Brian Quinby. Brian, how you doing? From Ohio, from just out of bed. From Ohio, from bed, the two most exciting

places in the entire world. Yeah, it's another, it's another transatlantic cast today and we got a whole ton of shit to get through. But I want to, I want to just start us out. I'm going to jump right in. I kind of want to get this out of the way at the beginning, right? A few days ago, crossing from across the channel from the continent, 39 people in the back of a refrigerated truck died because they suffocated. They were sneaking, they were basically coming in, sneaking in, smuggling and whatever. They were fleeing, you know, poverty and destitution. And then they died. And they died because of our insane fucking border policy. And it makes me very, very mad. It makes me very, very sad. And I don't quite

know how to handle it because it just keeps on happening in Europe, which is held up by America quite often as some kind of progressive paradise. Yeah. And I mean, this is unusual only in that it's a large concentration of deaths in one event, rather than the sort of steady trickle, which we used to Brian, this happens all the time in the Southwest of the US, right? Yeah. I mean, people do definitely die at the border. I don't, I, I'm so far away from it that like I'm kind of more divorced from it than even like somebody in Texas or something like that probably deals with it a lot. It's so it's very, it's like, it seems like it's happening in a far off land when you're up in Ohio. Of course. Yeah. Because

here it's like, we're like the size of Ohio. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Like it just like that whole part of the country is totally different than this. It's like, like, like honestly, like you guys have it right over there. We should be like five or six, maybe seven different countries over here. Oh, yeah. So it just feels it. I like, I feel the hopelessness. I the same way because it's just like, there's like, there's not an ICE detention center where I live to go protest or anything like that. Like if I want to do that, I have to get on an airplane and like go somewhere and do it. So it's and like, you know, this terrible thing is happening, but it's not like in plain sight necessarily. Me and Brett, me and Brett early, it could probably happen now.

Actually, we're talking about like just paying somebody like a shitty full time job rate to just sit outside and organize in front of a ICE detention center. That is a sick idea. You can probably like find someone on Fiverr to do that for you. Well, you could, I mean, we have so many people hanging around just like kind of hanging around the show that do artwork for us and stuff for $100 here, $200 there, whatever, where it's like, give you like $3,000 a month, you just go sit in front of the place and have people come to it. It's like the Andrew Yang policy, but better. So what's happened over here though, right? And is this one event, it's grabbed some headlines, but the way in which it's grabbed headlines has been

infuriating because it's all focused on three people who've been arrested on suspicion of people smuggling, which just assumes that like people smuggling just happens. It's not as though it's created by militarized borders that make it completely illegal to exist. These three guys just decided on a whim to like ship a bunch of people over in an airtight truck and like for no real reason. Right. That's how they report on fentanyl here, I think is the same way where it's like 35 people died in Ohio because some drug dealer was selling poison fentanyl. I don't think that's what happened. That's the reason why they do it is just to be like the Joker and be like an agent of chaos.

It's just like the adult version of the razor blade candy apple shed. It's like, oh, there are just some evil people out there doing evil things. And most importantly, it's not us. So like our home secretary, Preeti Patel, which for Americans would be, I think, are equivalent to like whichever member of the Burger King Kids Club Donald Trump has made Home Secretary in the US, Home Secretary, Minister of the Interior in the US rather, or whatever you guys call your people. It's like a combination of like Homeland Security, Attorney General, and Department of Interior. It's like Rudy. This is Rudy Giuliani. So what basically what they've done is their policies. That's this thing called the hostile

environment, which our British listeners are all about. But for Americans, it basically means that the border is everywhere. Like if you want to go to the doctor, you've got to prove that you that you have to you can be here legally. Our immigration police just exist all over the country. The landlords and immigration officer, which I'm sure they love doing to be to be perfectly honest, your banks and immigration officer. Every time you come in contact with the state, you're going to have to prove your nationality constantly. And like they send around vans telling people to go home if they're like here illegally, all that shit. It's wild. The vans don't happen so much anymore. It's more like letters. So they send you like polite letters being like,

we are going to deport you. There's a lot of we're watching you. The UK is a fucking snitch country. Yeah. Well, what I was going to say was that like, I saw like the converse of this, which was I saw like a bunch of like boomer memes on Facebook, which were people like defending the lorry driver who was kind of caught up in this on the basis that like, you know, that he wasn't actually people smuggler and he wasn't really doing anything. Like he wasn't aware that like there were people in his van and everything, which like, I feel like he's by the by base. It didn't really kind of, it goes back to Riley's thing, which is that I didn't really touch on the issue, which is, Hey, why does this keep happening? Because I was going to say that like I live

quite close to Dover or like my parents have quite close to Dover. So like I hear about these kinds of casualties and like deaths quite often through borders and stuff. But usually it's just like one or two people or you have those stories about like people who have been like seriously injured by like lorries as they're trying to kind of get into the UK. I think like the big, the gravity of this was that you were such like a high number and we hadn't really seen that. Like we haven't really seen a number like that before. Yeah. Well, not since 2005 anyway, where basically what happened was again, also like people from Fujian and China were just ushered on to a bay to go pick like scallops or

something. And then by their boss and then they're like, you know, semi slave driver boss just left them there to die when the tide came up. And like if the government just stopped, if the UK government just stopped its hostile environment policy or whatever the predecessor was, it wouldn't have happened. But it can't like this is the thing like it can't. Home Secretary, so Pete Pretty Patel tweeted, we're shocked and saddened by this tragic incident in Graves. Essex police have arrested. Of course you are. Essex police has arrested an individual. He must give them space to conduct their investigation. This is the same Pretty Patel who said that she doesn't need lectures on from the North London Metropolitan

elite dog whistle that on on on keeping a strong border on the country, right? So you got what you wanted. You're shocked and saddened because you got precisely what you wished for, right? Wanted boat. Look, you wanted to make this country so militarized around the border that it would just be you wanted to put machine guns on the on Dover that would just that would just fucking perforate French tourists just in case they were trying to claim benefits. I feel like fucking lesions. I feel like that's the natural conclusion because actually what you are, you know, for what it's worth, like this is actually, you know, this was genuinely the point. I think that when like the refugee crisis was kind of at its peak between like 2015 and 16 and you had

like 10, you know, up to hundreds of people dying in the Mediterranean every day and like a casual accepted answer was like, well, there's nothing we can really do about it all the way to like, you know, funding like the Libyan Coast Guard, which will send like these refugees to effectively death camps anyway. Yeah, or slave auctions. Depending. You know, the fact that like, like, like slavery has been like a huge issue in this country for like over, you know, over a decade and so much of this was done under like Theresa May as Home Secretary. Oh yeah, Brian, I don't know if you knew that, but there's a huge slavery problem in the UK. I didn't know. We have one of those too over here actually with our prisons. Huh, with how that keeps happening. I was actually

kind of refreshed there in a way. I know she's bad probably, the secretary, but for somebody to like be shocked and saddened about immigrant death is like kind of like, wow, that's like, we're not even at that level yet. You're not even doing performative regret. Yeah, we're still at like, well, they should have stayed in their home country if they wanted to live. So the U.S. is effective like the telegraph comment section as a government. So yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But also it's like Diane Abbott, the late labor shadow home secretary who could be really good on this has also totally fucked it. She said, our position is that if we were in power, there's a number of steps that need to be taken to make sure something of this can't happen again.

Now, the correct answer is dismantle the entire like fascist hostile environment completely and then create safe and legal ways to immigrate to the country. But she said the first step is to look at security at these smaller East Coast ports as the first step. You're supposed, look, if there weren't a lot of cops in this country, the BBC couldn't keep commissioning cop dramas. Speaking of the BBC, in fact, and this is sort of the capstone I'll put on this before we move on, BBC Question Time has decided that it's its main question in the day after this happened. The day after was they they proposed a question to the panel, would stricter border checks save lives, presumably by dissuading people from coming here entirely, as though we just they need to come

to our like suburban town centers and go to like go to what the club that smells like sort of vomit and stale WKD, you can't you just can't get it up Britain so fucking great. Well, the thing is, like if you die, like if you die in Songat, or the Mediterranean, or Libya, or the Sahara, it doesn't count. You don't really die. Whereas if you die in Britain, you die in real life. Yeah, it's like if you die here, then it's a new then it's a problem. If you die elsewhere, then the border policy is working. Because much like the US sort of seems to make its border policy to pander to people who sort of wake up every morning and check under their bed for MS 13. Britain's border policy seems to be pandering to guys who like go to the pub and

imagine how they would beat up Al Qaeda if they ever wandered into their town. I mean, as liberal as it that reform like that kind of reform talk is about as liberal as it gets here, you know, it's like there's there's people in like kind of our circles that are like open the borders. I don't give a shit who comes in here. And then like, the only normal people are like, well, we still need to like have like a 45 hour line to get into the border. And we got to like spray them with like pesticides and stuff like that before we let them in. Having like a reasonable pragmatic policy of only having like a 20 foot barbed wire. Yes, that's exactly what it is. Because like I just like every argument I get in is like, why do you even fucking care who comes here? Like, what is the big

worry of the people that are going to come here that are mostly like just coming here to either like be with their family or like work a job that's barely going to pay them? Like, what's the worst that they're going to do to you? And they never have an answer for that. Actually, I'll tell a funny story because because they won't hear it. My father, my father in law yelled at me one time when there was a story about an immigrant caravan coming into the country. And he was like, he was like, they're, they're going to bring fucking diseases. Those people, they don't get vaccinations. And the guy has fucking two grandkids that didn't get vaccinated because their parents are anti-vaxxers. So like that kind of thing is like, it is like such a weird fucking thing. Like

there's no real good reasons why the border just can't even just be open. You know, it used to be. It's like, it's all these things, right? Where as soon as you have something you can't imagine life before it, we didn't have these punitive border checks like what, 15 years ago, even we didn't even have a border to speak of 100 years ago. It was, it's psychically important to a lot of these guys, I think that somebody somewhere is suffering. Like, yeah, you can't overstate the importance, I think of that. Yeah, like, I'm doing better than somebody is like, I mean, I always thought that was just like a uniquely American thing where it was like, oh, no, no, no, no, we, we got, we got like every single person is like, well, yeah, I mean, I hate it that people suffer,

but you know, they didn't work as hard as me. So it's good that I'm better than them. Yeah, I worked hard to get born here. But we've got, we've got quite a bit. So I do want to move on to something slightly lighter, allegedly lighter that might end up not being. So I've got, I've got a startup here. So I'm going to, I'm going to say the name and I want everyone to guess what they think it does. The name is Vaak. Vaak? V-A-A-K. Vaak. Vaak. Is it Klingon? Maybe. Vaak. Yes, Vaak. Plastics extrusion is what I think it does. Okay, yep. Brian, I like it. I like a guess that's actually like something because usually my fucking, no, usually my hog-ish co-host will say something along the lines of, oh, is it a movie from the 1990s? Is it a sex dildo company

that extrudes the sex dildos? Yes, exactly. So unfortunately, however, you're wrong. Is it, is it phrenology tools, but the company is based in Hamstam? Yes, it is phrenology tools. It is phrenology tools. It's based in Japan. Oh, damn. Okay. Vaak. Vaak. Okay. What's that phrenology deal? Vaak operates a human analysis platform with behavior recognition for prevention of blank. Hey, can I ask, are they the fucking psychos that are putting those necklaces on people that tell like when they're having conversations at work or like walking around and stuff? Do you know what I'm talking about? Like the metric thing? We did them. We did. We did. We actually did that startup already on a previous episode on a premium. No, Vaak just prevents one

thing. Miscegenation. There's probably not going to be a funnier guest than that. So I'm going to say this is now all the websites in Japanese. So I had to like find other other sources. So Vaak, you had to learn Japanese watching you and knows a crime is about to take place before it happens. It's minority report. Yeah, pre-cooked shit. It's minority report. But again, it's real and it probably doesn't work that well. So that's the surveillance thing that catches shoplifters before they do it, right? So yes, they've developed an AI software that hunts for potential shoplifters using footage from security cameras, checking for fidgeting restlessness in other suspicious body language. I was just in the store last night and I was high on drugs

and I was wearing a hoodie and a pair of sweatpants that were big hoodie. And I'm always fidgety. I'm like a fidgety guy. And as I was walking out, that news story popped in my mind that was like, they fucking are definitely that would think I was shoplifting for sure. Solidarity to the naturally suspicious person. Yes, I am. Because I can't wait to get tackled by a Tesco SWAT team because I miss a day of my meds and I'm just slightly twitchy than usual. For real, everybody I know, not my wonderful wife or my daughter, they're normal. But like every male that I know looks like a fucking shoplifter, like all my friends. You just have that vibe. Yeah. I mean, the worst thing is that when you

have the shoplifting vibe and then you get stopped or whatever on the time when you're not shoplifting and you're like, I wasn't even going to rob you today. I just I was just wearing big pants. That is actually a good day for me. Like I have a really good memory of that happening. I was like at a CD store and this guy thought I shoplifted an ICP CD. Very unbranded for Street Fight. Which I already had the CD like, so why should I shoplift it anyway? And he came and chased me out of the store and said, give me the ICP CD back and I was like, go and search me, dude. Go and search me and he searched me and he didn't find anything. So it was that satisfying. It's like, no, I already own it. You fucker. Yeah. I'm like the opposite

of that though. I feel like if I'm going to get searched, it better because I'm so. So the goal is prevention. If the target is approached and ask if they need for help, there's a good chance that that never happens. That's the idea. They recognize that you're about to step out to steal because you're just going in there and like not standing perfectly still with a resting heart rate of like 70 and then just and then you just get approached and said hello to. But they also work with police. So this is from from the famously uncorrupt Japanese. Yes. Well, this is from Press. They used it last year to successfully track down one person who shoplifted from a convenience store in Yokohama. And it turns out he was like just an 80 year old man who forgot. Yeah. Cool. Worth it.

This cost only 300 billion yen. Yeah. And it just they managed to just they basically used it just to harass the elderly. Yeah. Just it's literally that they did the the dark night thing where Bruce Wayne tapped everybody's phones and like Lucius Fox is like, no, we can never do this again. I resign. It's a huge civil liberties imposition. It's that but for like finding a guy who left the meter running slightly too long. I mean, what is like really honestly, what is the point of something like this when like, at least in America for sure, the supermarkets have all written off shoplifting as like a thing that they even care about anymore. It seems like I mean, there's like a veneer of like, hey, don't steal. There's cameras everywhere, you know. But like

they put no the the manned cash registers don't even run anymore. Oh, yeah. Most of the day. It's all self checkout. And like you read a news story every two weeks about how like, oh, you know, 60% of people steal from self checkout. So you know what, like just fuck it. You might as well just let people steal because people are paying for most of the stuff anyway. There's no like they've already written it off. Developing technology isn't going to like stop it from happen. We're they're lucky we're not like just walking in there and taking stuff and walking out. It's actually it's anarchism in action because we de facto pay what you want. And I also think like, I mean, they they have like gotten rid of the people that work at the

cash registers. Like in Columbus, Ohio, there's a while it's all over the country, a place called Kroger, where they used to like bag your groceries for you. And then there's a company called Aldi where like the whole thing was okay, so everything's cheaper at Aldi because they don't bag for you, right? They don't like get the carts and stuff at Kroger. They were supposed to put that with that's luxury, right? Like, I'm going to go in there. They're going to bag my groceries. They're going to put them in a fucking cart and they're going to take them out to my car for me. They got rid of all of that. And now I'm like not only like ringing up the groceries, but I'm bagging the groceries and I'm putting them in my cart and I'm taking them out to my car.

So fuck, you've saved so much money. You might as well just let people steal. You know, you're basically just tipping yourself at that point. Yes, but I mean, you're working for them. You might as well take a side. The brave politician, which doesn't exist, but that goes out and exists, that you deserve to be paid a wage for ringing up your own groceries will be a huge success. 100% of the vote. So Vak says, that's actually what emotional labor is. They want to install, they want to upgrade from just shoplifting detection, though, to murder and terrorism detection at airports, shopping malls and talks with government bodies in the U.S. Singapore and UAE to introduce the service. I'm going to be in prison. I'm going to be in prison now,

see, because I feel murderous all the time. Imagine just imagine like the UAE or Qatar with just cameras everywhere, just detecting someone who isn't either a citizen of the country or like on a seven figure salary and just tell just trebucheting them out of the out of the country. I mean, it's definitely like it definitely can't go wrong. And yeah, they definitely won't be a situation where someone will, you know, an enemy of the state who was definitely murdered will actually be considered to be fine because the tape is kind of played backwards. They'll play his entire life's tape backwards. Absolutely. Jamal Khashoggi walking backwards out of the embassy and then all the way to his house. I mean,

they did prevent him from shoplifting very effectively. How could this man murder someone else when his eyes are perfect? Like a perfectly separate from each other. So also any guesses as to who funds the company that wants to put cameras detecting every crime everywhere and all over every country? Soft bank. Same people who fund WeWork. Interestingly, WeWork, back when it was a company, used the same technology. Regular listeners of the show will know this to install cameras and motion sensors all around every single one of their offices to determine that people want coffee in the morning, but to do it using numbers. I sort of, I actually, WeWork makes me sad because they knocked down a very cool old

building in my city to build a WeWork. And now it looks like it's going to go out of business. This is true in London as well. So like I went running the other day and there's like a place in Aldgate East, which used to be like this old kind of chapel, this really like beautiful old chapel. And it's a WeWork now. And like what they've done, because you've got like these kind of very old stone walls and I guess like the city of London just won't let them, didn't let them knock it down, was that they've put like a thing of glass. They've put like a glass kind of, the glass panels around it. So you go in and this looks super, super weird. Yeah. But fancy. It's fancy. People like to work at a fancy place. So they put glass everywhere.

I was depressed because like it's not even open yet. And it's like in America, at least they are like basically any building that's older than like 15 years old, they knock it down and they put a co-working place in it or like a condo complex. So it was like real depressing to see that one of them's a WeWork. And it's like, damn, that one didn't even like need to be built. Really? Not no point. Not even. It's failing to deliver even on its stated aims, which we know are bullshit. But I do want to discuss this old standby of the show. A certain mired and controversy real estate for a mass creating is a tech company with a sky high valuation.

So as we know, on October 9th, nine days after WeWork shelved its plans for an IPO, the CFO of Compass, Kristen Ankerbrand, sent her staff a memo of talking points, talking about all the ways in which Compass isn't WeWork. It's not WeWork, everyone. That's always a good sign. That's a great sign. I love to get an email to all staff from the CFO that says, everything's fine. Stop comparing us to bubble. What bubble? We're just a normal tech company that doesn't have any technology. It's your barone sanitation strikes again. We're like a Sopranos tech company. We are Webistics. So she wrote, over the past few weeks, we have seen comparisons being drawn between Compass and WeWork

simply because we share SoftBank as our major investor. We have seen them through this network of cameras that we've installed and all. To be clear, our businesses are very different in terms of business model, capital structure, customers, culture, most importantly, and investments, which I think is very, very funny because we're going to go into what Compass is a little bit and spoiler alert, it's exactly the same. It's an identical thing. So the CEO, Robert Refkin said, there's nothing about what's happening at WeWork that changes what's happening at Compass. He had it that he hasn't even followed the office-based companies

failed IPO saying, I do not have any viewpoint on WeWork as a company. Diamonds, Kingship. What's a truck? Kingship. Yeah. So what is Compass exactly? It's a real estate agent. That's it. It's a real estate agent. And they make all their money by buying up brokerage firms all over the United States with high producing real estate agents at them and targeting the most expensive property in the country. And that's all they do. Huh. That sounds familiar to a certain other real estate company, which also buys very expensive buildings in major cities.

The difference is WeWork was a place to work, whereas Compass is a place to live. See, I thought it was like because Compass has fruit in their kind of free-flavored water, whereas WeWork has vegetables. That's like, you need your five a day from either your co-working space or your real estate company. To be fair, their business model is different, but it's only different in as much as a real estate broker versus an office space lender is different. But neither of them are technology companies. Not that being a technology company is a thing. So here is their mission statement. Everybody do hold on to something because this is a doozy.

Bracing myself. Compass is a real estate company with a purpose. Our mission is to help everyone find a tradwife real estate company. Our mission is to help everyone find their place in the world. See, I thought every time a company says that they're a company with a purpose, I think that they're going to be like, well, for each apartment that you rent, we're going to give them an apartment to a kid in like a third world country that needs food. So at least it's better than that. That's like the model. For Street Fight, we watch Shark Tank a lot. And it's like every low rent, small business idiot that comes walking through there will say like, so yeah, I'm making these nice flip flops. And each pair of flip flops I sell,

I send one to a kid in an African country that doesn't have flip flops. That's what I think when I think of a purpose, you know. However, I want to I want a real estate company that just doesn't have a purpose. And their mission statement is like, we're a real estate company that's going to fuck around and find out. We're not going to do anything. We're a real estate company that's going to make you fucking sign contracts. You just go in and it's one guy playing just playing PlayStation and smoking weed. But he said he's a tech company. So soft bank is giving him a billion dollars. So what's it valued at? So it's got more than 13,000 agents nationwide that it just acquires brokerages and acquires brokerages like locally. And so now it's valued

at 6.4 billion dollars, which is more than seven times the market cap of like the nation's largest brokerage conglomerate. That's way more agents, but actually relatively small in terms of like the other soft bank investments in terms of how much they're like supposedly valued. You tell me about numbers like, oh, actually, that seems pretty reasonable compared to a lot of the stuff I've read over the past few days. It's one of these things, right? We're just like, WeWork was valued at five times the size of his largest competitor. Compass is valued at like seven times its largest competitor. But that's just because soft bank keeps giving it money. It's almost like this is some kind of scheme. Yeah, a scheme, you know, what a Fonsarelli scheme,

a Fonsi scheme. Based on like a certain Irish architectural structure. Yes, indeed. So I want to get in the like, why can't I get in the part in a Fonsi scheme? Like that's what bothers me is like, I want a bunch of money too. And nobody's willing to just hand me a bunch of money. The original Ponzi guy was just a guy who was like, Yeah, give me some money and I'll make you some more money. I'm going to do it. Yeah, I'm going to start a Ponzi scheme. That seems like the best scheme. That's the real Horatio out of the ship. I think the thing I like about the Ponzi scheme is that you don't have to like make anything or do any work or anything like that. You just have to say,

give me some money. Plus, how often do you have a scheme? You know, let's know. One crucial thing about the Ponzi scheme though, is that you need to post on LinkedIn and Instagram a lot about how you're waking up at five in the morning and listening to Malcolm Gladwell audiobooks at double speed. And you have to do it in poetry form. Like this is something I figured out today, Instagram poetry. So last year, Compass sold $3.4 billion in homes and made a profit of nothing. It lost an enormous amount of money. This happens. So why? Well, because they're a tech company. Compass, they say. This is the head of investment soft bank describing Compass. Here we go. Are we ready? Are we ready for some horse shit?

Yes. I want to hear the worst reason you could give somebody $6.4 billion. Do you think it's a valuation? They must, they would have given them probably some hundreds of millions for a certain percent, but. Oh, okay. Sorry, Mr. Business. Compass is building a differentiated end to end tech platform that aggregates across diverse data streams to support agents and home buyers through the entire process, well beyond the initial home search with disruptive technology and unique data advantages. Compass is well positioned for future growth in a sector that represents trillions in transaction volume. But does it mean anything? What do you think? What do we think that means?

It's just the luckiest fucking people in the world get to like write stuff like that and get him $100 billion. So I just, I mean, you've got to figure that's exhausting to write though. Like that guy's probably fucking miserable. He just doesn't mean anything. So I'm just sort of frantically gesturing at who's saying to talk into the microphone. Oh, I see. That's what you meant. Okay. All right. Okay. I'm gonna say, what are you telling me? What are these words? I just wanted to say one thing, which was like, the easiest way to make money, it seems, is literally what you just said about like, I know we have that joke about like, you know, oh, I identify as an attack helicopter, right? But what if you just said that I identify

as like a tech company? And then softback just has to give you like, I'm gonna do this. I'm gonna transition into being a tech company. I mean, that's like 90% of anything, right? Except for like, if it were, don't choose like show business. Like if you were like, just like, it seems like with these tech companies, you can be like, oh, you know, I got a like an idea for an app that like, informs you when you got to do the dishes. And like, but then you like write the thing out and you're like, we're trying to disrupt dish doing and like, you know, form a spot in the market, and they will give you $100 million. Like as long as you like, because you have to have an app, just don't choose show business, because that one, they make you write stuff.

Yeah. So right, you mentioned an app. I actually have the list of what Compass has done to make themselves a tech company as opposed to just a big real estate broker. And here's what it is. So since the how many just to so as since the end of last year, a 20 person AI team has launched four tools, including a predictive search feature for their website that suggests properties to customers based on their browsing history. It's Amazon, you bought a house, would you be interested in a second or one to a sleek feature called Compass Collections, which serves as a sort of Pinterest for property showings. So it's also got a vision board. Zillow, a kind of Pinterest, do you mean it shows up in Google image results and then it makes you log in and nobody ever

fucking does it? And there's also an online forum on how to improve their products and a couple of apps, neither of which work. Great. Oh my God. I think forums are really retro. Wish I would have gotten to tech. I wish I wasn't an idiot in school and just didn't do anything. And like, I wish I would have learned to code because I think I could be a 20 billionaire right now. Yeah. So you could still be an idiot. You just have to be a slightly different kind of idiot. It's probably also worth mentioning like a generic. It's probably also worth mentioning, but like the people who run these companies don't aren't even kind of like coders themselves, right? Like Newman isn't a coder. No, the guys who run Uber aren't coders. There's not any code

that's going. There's the amount of code that's like, there's not even coding. Yeah. It's just owning real estate brokerage and then saying, oh, yeah, we have a website. Fucking up at being a landlord, the easiest way to make it. It's incredible. Like these guys, like there's nothing anybody could be these guys. Like I was arguing. I was in an argument once with my father in law where I was talking about how nobody's as serves as much money as Jeff Bezos. And he's like, uh, you got to be careful when you start talking about taking money from guys like Jeff Bezos who worked really hard and innovated. And I was like, he, he invented a store. Like there was already stores. He's not charismatic. He's nothing like there's nothing

about the guy. And that's what like fucking drives me crazy about like all the, all the tech billionaires and stuff. It's like, they're not even like charismatic. There's, there's just nothing of, I don't want to be Elon Musk because he seems like a dipshit to me. You know, like we had more guy and stuff. It's like, who wants to be that, you know? Well, like I have a recurring thing about this that I like this better when we just had kings because at least then like you can believe that the guy was appointed by God and he has a fancy hat and stuff. Instead of being some dipshit and like a black t-shirt, like, like a guy that invented a flamethrower for fun is just a fuck you, dude. Fuck this guy. If you have a king,

at least he can cure fucking Sprocula. So now that we're talking about the kings, I want to move on because they're, why are we different from we work? Thesis seems to be mostly centered on their CEO and some of their internal policies. So in the October memo, she noted that all employees have to have compass, have to fly and coach and that any expense over a thousand dollars has to be personally signed off by the CFO. So, you know, the fact that like, because that's the major problem with we work, right? Was that Adam Newman had like a gold bathtub and flew everywhere in a private jet. It wasn't that it was a fundamentally unsound organization. What else does it say differentiates them? So this is what I find very funny.

The CEO, Refkin, said, people don't just work for money, they work for impact, so I understand how important culture is. It doesn't even... No, you don't understand anything then. It doesn't even make sense. People just work for money. Especially real estate agents. Real estate agents just do it for the love of paperwork. Is he just saying that like culture can't work if people don't work with the soul? What does he mean? My brain is like melting right now. He means don't look at our business model. Right. Like, okay, I'll say this. I don't just work for money. I work for like my own satisfaction and to make an impact and stuff, but I'm also a fucking podcaster for a living.

Yeah. Saying that to anybody that has a real job is so... That is like the fundamental problem with corporate America at this point where it's like... They're like, oh, the employees, we had a record year this year. I'll say this about my wife's company. They're like, we had a record year this year, so they hand them a t-shirt with the slogan of the company on it, and then they have like a Deerx Bentley concert for them where the guy sings songs about like the company. And it's like, nobody wanted that. At least in the mid-2000s, it was like T-Pain. Well, that's the other thing. Compass also sent all of its employees on buses rather than planes

to a three-week camping holiday in the Adirondacks. So that means I work in class. So we also... Back to the CEO though, because I love this. Did you say three weeks? I'm sorry. I don't mean to cut you off there. Did you say a three-week camping trip? I just strained you in the Adirondacks. Pamp Compass 2018 on Compass Real Estate's YouTube channel. Check it out. Of course, it was a fucking summer camp. Three weeks is a fucking month. I can't even tour for three weeks. We've gotten to the point where the capitalists are gulagging themselves.

They're able to fucking actually... Just imagine telling your... Kissing your family. I gotta kiss my wife and kid goodbye and say, I'll be back in three weeks. I'm going to grab ass with everybody I work with out in the Adirondacks. I'm going to work. No, don't worry. I'm going to camp, but it's for the culture. It's fun. So here's the more about their CEO, which I love. On a drizzly day in mid-August, Refkin was dressed in a gray suit and white dress shirt with no tie. His uniform when he's not clad in his Compass swag. Where's your Compass t-shirt an agent called out as Refkin strode onto the 11th floor of

the company's headquarters at 95th Avenue? That's the Robert we know and love. Not love. Love is the wrong word. No, no. We have a deep love for this man because he wears a slightly different kind of shirt. Refkin's demeanor always softens when he stops to make small talk with the brokers. He doesn't want to seem arrogant or entitled one of the executives said. But I think it's so funny, right? Because they're all trying to be the opposite of the last thing that fucked up by changing the most surface level shit. So it's like. Yeah, it's going to flip back around the next guy after this implodes is going to be

another like Napoleonic massive ego. Now there's just like this $6.4 billion startup that's essentially a website that doesn't quite work is saying, no, no, no, don't worry. Our valuations are irrational. Our CEO is like a bus station guy. You see, he's I mean, have you considered that he's nice and that's worth $6.4 billion? What if he's cool? No, because I'm nice and I'm not worth $6.4 billion to know I will. I love the shirt thing because like I'm doing this thing about shock jocks on my feed. And like there is this like clip where like they all work in radio, you know, and like I found this leaked meeting of Howard Stern talking to his audience.

And he's fucking yelling at them because they don't wear Howard Stern shirts to work. Yo, in charge of a tech company, when? Oh my God, you know what? I'll send you. I'll send you the link to the meeting and you will definitely be like, oh my God, he is just a normal regular boss guy because he's getting he's giving a power point that he clearly made himself very uncomfortable, very like everybody that I've sent it to. Everybody sent it to has been like, this is 53 minutes long. And then they're like, I watched all 53 minutes twice. So I'm aware, Brian, you you have to roll in a moment, but I do have to leave in three minutes.

Yes. With these last three minutes, let us speculate. First, if Howard Stern was a tech company, he would clearly be saying like I'm disrupting soap by making a new engineered formula that you buy in an app. My company is worth $9 billion. I haven't figured out the recipe yet. What do you think he would do? I Howard Stern, what would he do? I mean, he would make a fucking fart app. Like I can guarantee he would be like, I've made this app that smells your farts. And because it has to have to do with farts, if he's Howard Stern, I've decided to make this app that smells your farts and then tells you what you if you're healthy, if your food has been healthy. And it's called like the fart man app. And I'm going to need

$7 billion to make it. It just it just works like Theranos. It just takes a tiny sound. It's an app in your phone. It doesn't even take in any of the actual physical gas released by your body. It just hears if you're farting and then just tells you whatever shit. Here's the sound and the sound of your fart. And if you hear the sound of your fart, you can tell if you have broccoli that day. That's the Howard Stern app. Thank you. So with that, Brian, thank you very much for hopping on for the first first two thirds of this episode. Yeah. And I apologize. I overslept. I know it's at noon. I am a piece of shit. It's all good. I owe you. Don't worry about it. It's a pleasure. I owe you all and thanks for

having me on. Yo, Brian, anytime and people can find you on Street Fight and they can also find you and Felix Biedermann on Shock Jocks. Yes. The Street Fight Patreon $5 level. We have a show called Shocktober where me and Felix analyze one Shock Jock every week for five weeks. And then people love it. People seem to really like it. I recommend it. It's very fun. And Mancow is a dipshit. Hell yeah. Tune in to that shit. Thanks, guys. Thanks a lot, Brian. Now for... Oh, right. I think we have time for one more article. Just the three of us. Reading series. Yes. So the podcast's favorite Labrador in politics has written an article again. And it's very short and it's very fun. Great. So here is what Matt Hancock, the health and social care secretary,

has written. Friend of the show, of course. Walking the dog or joining a choir can ease the pain. Did he do like existential pain? Well, my man, my man's been listening to XXXTentacion. Yeah. I think that's gotta be what it is. He's been thinking about that suicide shit. He's just like, no, not today. When we go to see our GP Hancock writes, we want them to help us feel better. When we go to see our shared GP on a big tandem bicycle. We all, the entire country rides a gigantic bicycle to go see the one GP that's left. Also, I just love the idea that Matt Hancock is kind of figuring this stuff out, stuff out as he writes it. He's like, okay, why do people want to go to see the GP to make themselves feel better? There we go. Okay, we're rolling now,

baby. You just go to your GP because your vibes are off. We want them to make the pain go away, to cure our condition and for them to help us feel ourselves again. Human condition. Sometimes that will mean we need medical treatment, not under the NHS as Matt Hancock runs it, of course. But as I've come to realize, the best medicine is not always found in the form of a pill or indeed anything behind the counter at a local pharmacist. Yeah, you have to get the light under the spoon. He's writing about vibes. He's writing about vibes. He's literally writing about vibes. He is basically what this article is going to say. Oh my God, Marianne Hancock. I'm saying it's even more. He wants basically to make the movie Patch Adams part of the UK's

medical strategy. Matt Hancock with crystals and orbs. Have you heard about astrology? We know, for example, that walking the dog each day can often breathe life and energy back into a person with a painful chronic illness. Let's not fund the treatment of any of this. What if they just got a dog? Also, it's factually incorrect. Also, talking to your microphone. No, but also like it's that's factually incorrect. Yeah, but he heard it, but he heard it somewhere. One of his friends said, don't forget Matt Hancock, it doesn't know better. He's got a lot of, yeah, he heard it from beyond the veil. He's got a lot of friends, I guess. So how the chance to meet people at a local community choir can offer relief to a person

with dementia or how a game of walking football can bring together people who are lonely. This is just, he just saw promoted tweets from like supermarkets. No, what he, this is like, yeah, it's the same as he's gone to like that stationary store in the UK called Scribbler, where they have like a collection of notebooks, which all have like inspirational so-called inspirational quotes on them, like the whole life, love, love thing, hang out with your friends every day is grind day, Prosecco for me, etc. Yeah, so I think with this is like, this is why Matt Hancock, like he's, he and Liz Trust will never be beaten as Instagram Tories, right?

And for the record, I am absolutely about tracing gender dysphoria with Prosecco. I mean, it is both a treatment and also the end state because then you can be a very basic white girl. Just a few weeks ago, a study from the Wildlife Trust added to the weight of evidence that doing activities outdoors can help alleviate symptoms for people with anxiety and depression. Why does that sound euphemistic? What are you doing? It's great because it means that instead of funding mental health care and parks, we can just cut the funding in half for both and then one can do double jobs. Right. Well, actually, you know, I was reading this and it kind of,

I see where it comes from in the sense, not in the sense that like it's like legitimate, but also that this is an argument that like lots of the kind of, I guess, for lack of a better phrase, like the IEA kind of people like to talk about. I mean, we'd like to do it under the guise of like, well, you know, the left love to talk about, you know, the left love to talk about how much they hate corporations, but they seem to love big pharma, especially when it comes to antidepressants. So they kind of like draw this false equivalence between like criticizing, legitimately criticizing like pharmaceutical companies, not for the creation of pharmaceuticals, but like for like

the absolutely absurd charges that are like placed on them or like the massive like price inflation or things that are designed to like marginalize poor people. And they just like take it to a whole like just a whole other level of, you know, what we're proposing like natural solutions, like going out for a walk. But this also ignores like a second problem too, which is that like the people that they're talking about, like, you know, a lot of the time they live in, you know, they live in kind of really like torn down towns. They live in like really hard to live in sissies, right? That's true. So a lot of these people who have like chronic illnesses might be like living in a council house and they've never been off their estate.

Right. How the fuck are they going to go to an AOMB? Right. Or like the parks. How are you going to get a dog? How are you going to get a dog if your landlord like isn't going to let you do it? How do you kind of even like take a walk in like a park or a playground when it's like privately owned and you're not allowed to go into that space, right? What about like... What if your GP was the park? So this is like, and he can write about this as like someone who comes from his perspective or like one of his friends, because like they live in middle class, count like countryside,

right? They literally could go... Oh, good. That's a good thing. I don't need to go to the GP. I live on an estate. I can just walk around the grounds of my estate. Yeah. Just pick some medicinal herbs and do some parkour. Yeah. And that's right. Like it's the thing. It's like, this probably isn't even wrong. Like I'm sure that like getting out into the community and hanging out with people probably does help. Yeah. Yeah. All of this shit's right. It's just you can tell it's so transparently cynically deployed. Yeah. And like not to do more Marianne Williams and stuff, but the crisis of vibes in this country, right? Like you're not going to be able to

fucking join a choir if you're so beaten down by austerity or the hostile environment everywhere or the police, any number of things. It's just going to totally take away those options for you. If you have a zero hours contract, if they call you in the middle of your choir practice, oops, looks like it's depression again this week. But not even the practical barriers. I mean, just in terms of vibes, right? Like if you get off work and it's like you're one day off and you're just exhausted, you're not going to fucking go and join a male voice choir. So today he says, I'm launching... You get a podcast like normal people. Today, he says. And you deal with your depression that way.

I'm launching the National Academy for Social Prescribing, the realization of a long held ambition of mine to ensure people have access to a huge range of options to improve their health. Although fucking... This is a thing, right? GP's talking about prescribing alternative therapies like getting a dog or joining a choir is a thing that is known in doctor circles as shit life syndrome because you can't prescribe away something like unemployment. It's literally a thing used to like deride Matt Hancock's own policies and he just looks at it because he has the brain of a Labrador and is like, wow, this is awesome. I mean, it's basically like a few steps away from like him proposing mindfulness as like a legitimate strategy. There's only a few steps away. That

just literally is that. Which they absolutely will do if you try and get psychiatric treatment on the It goes back to what you're saying, which is that in theory, he's not wrong, right? Like even most doctors, even kind of most mental health activists kind of say that actually these things can really help because medicinal prescriptions, they kind of only resolve a few problems, but they're not kind of... You kind of need these societal changes, which is why whenever we talk about mental health and well-being, what we actually need to be talking about more is, well, how do we kind of create a society where people aren't like so reliant on medication and stuff like that? Right. Or even just a society with less arbitrary cruelty and venality.

You know, I'm just thinking about this. I was thinking about this like on the way here, which was like he's also just talking to white people. Like let's be quite frank here. Like he's talking to either he's talking to white people and when you're a person of color, especially a person of color who is poor and is kind of more, you know, subject more to like state surveillance, you know, policing. We spoke, if you go and hang out with your friends and you get put on a watch list. Right. Yeah, that's gang activity. You become a minor gangster. I love like trying to go to the cinema with my friends of an accidentally ending up in like a in a deportation center. Don't worry, Diane Abbott is considering closing one of those.

Right. That's actually how MS-13 started was people wanted to go and see a movie. So like if you're kind of, you know, so if you're in a government that's like actively like restraining people from living their lives and then kind of telling people that, hey, the only thing that you need to do to like help you feel better is to live your life. It's sort of it kind of like cancels each other out, which I'm sure he's aware of, but it's like, yeah. I'm not touching you. I'm not touching you. Yeah, I'm not stopping you from joining this quite. The GP just writes, you know, they scribble on their prescription pad and they just give you the prescription pad and they've just written live, laugh,

love and tell you to frame the piece of paper. Literally, though, this prescription pad is the prescription. All we can afford to give you is this piece of paper. That's the other thing. I want to go fuck you, Matt Hancock, fund my vagina. I want to go back fund this pussy, baby. I want to go back to what Matt Hancock said, which is it's a long held ambition of mine to ensure people have access to a huge range of options to improve their health. What he's doing is he's giving everyone a huge range of options at the expense of any depth in any of the ones that work. No, are we going to give you doctors? No, but we're going to give you several apps and instruction to go get some fresh air, suggest you get a dog and then I don't know them.

It's it's choice. You have a choice of these trivialities kind of indicate, but like the medicinal like root is a legitimate one that everyone has access to taking. What he's doing is restricting people's choices. It's like, well, we're going to take away the choice that could help you the most. But what we're going to do instead is give you a bunch of options, which will help you the least. Yeah, you have choice because that's more things and like, you know, abundance is, you know, look at, look how abundant, like look how great capitalism is. Look at all the stuff you get. None of it works, but there's so much of it. You can use two apps to meditate and you can walk in this small little square outside your estate.

What we've done is we've replaced the entire country's prescription service with Kickstarter. So you just back a pill that you think will help you. Matt Hancock has had had a meeting to launch a very interesting new mindfulness startup and he had a meeting with like this, this very promising company. You might have heard of it. It's called Softbank. So we want every person in England to have access to these kinds of services over the next few years, you know, because you don't, because all the people who don't currently have access to parks will have access to parks when a GP tells them to go for a walk in the park over the next few years even, right? Yeah. So, you know, take a train in two buses

and talking to the mic and like make sure your kid has like, you know, because also, you know, also this is, you know, the people, like a lot of people who are subject to this are like single parents, right? So what do you do if you're kid? What do you do when you're, you know, you know, when your kid's at school and you have to work multiple jobs and, you know, what do you, what do you do with obesity? How do you, your GP prescribes you a diet to lose weight and you live in a food desert? What good is that going to do? Well, I mean, I don't know, gains maybe? I guess it's, it's just, it's, it's all Instagram. So Matt Hancock is actually aiming to get everyone jacked. They're trying, they just, like I said, these people just look at promoted

Instagram stories from fitness influencers and like book summary services and like, I don't know, Jordan Peterson's daughter and they're just like, we're going to make all of our policy based on that. I like how we've gone from a headline, which is quite affable, right? Like, walking the dog or joining a quirk and ease pain sounds like fucking like local news, right? And we've stripped away some less here and it's actually quite evil. What? No. What? No. That's not our idea. Just a bit of trivia here, but you know Jordan Peterson's daughter is dating Andrew Tate. Yes, I did see that because you showed me. It was like two in the morning and I was just like, I just got into this weird hole and I was like, what? That's crazy. I think, look,

they're probably going to have a great time in Bishop's Stortford. Right. Just two slabs of jerky just banging off each other. Well, I just like the idea that Andrew Tate can't stop going to prevent like awful suburban London towns and just hating the UK because Hamel Hampstead sucks. So Hancock goes on and what I think is probably the most egregious line of this article, patients have the right to expect care from the NHS that treats them as a person, not a medical condition. So translating, patients have the right to expect care from the NHS that does not treat their medical condition. Yes, but they will see your whole person. They'll be your friend. They will check your vibes. It is prescription vibe check.

Oh God. Yeah, I didn't even know what to say about that because also this is like, like if you've got an actual like medical problem, if you've got like a medical issue that needs to be dealt with and like the way that you deal with it, if you know, if you're kind of able to like medicinally, then like treating you as a person means treating you as a human being, i.e. this human being needs to have this medication if they are going to like live the best life that they can. I want to be well. But it's expensive. It's expensive to do that. Yeah. It's really expensive. But walking in the park is free. It's free. Especially if like you have a mortgage and you live in. That's for now. I can't wait for us to hire a bunch of like Italian doctors who all

of his prescription is like, hey baby, a smile is free. I mean, you hire an Italian doctor and he prescribes you to see Palli actually the clown. I mean, this type of advice Matt Hancock is giving out is like it kind of really just does apply to like mortgage owners in Hemel Hempstead where the only frat when it comes to walking in a park is getting punched in the face by Andrew Tate. And arguably, you don't know whether that's going to happen. Oh, it slays me every single time. That's that's why that's why you need the dog against Andrew Tate. Look, we have an immigration policy that keeps letting in these like incredibly insane violent kickboxers. We have to deploy the gunboats to stop Andrew Tate.

The current terrorized English commuter town outside of like it. That's that's what Diane Abbott should be announcing is a hostile environment for one guy for just one fucking dick. We keep the same number of immigration officers that just all following him around in like a Macedonian faith. So this is like 60 a 60 cop buffer between him and everyone else. Keeping keeping keeping the country's like 23 year old coked up shit he'll save from getting their shit kicked in by one psychopath in a BMW. He drives, I think he drives a Ferrari now.

Oh, god damn. Oh, special guy. Special special guy. I needed that. That was cathartic. All right, I think I think that's that's that's all you get for this week. Oh my goodness. Just the image of Andrew Tate's Ferrari in a 60 mile long convoy with every single immigration enforcement van in the country. That's the type of future that the liberals want. And that is the type of future that the liberals will get like after the general election.

Labor generally has been very shitty on the hostile environment. Like I remarked a couple of times that like Diane Abbott, like for being pretty really, really good in almost every other area, just really kind of fucks it when it comes to the hostile environment. So we need to somehow shift labor's policy to just protecting the country from Andrew Tate. All right. So I think now it falls only to me to retroactively thank Brian Quinnby from Street Fight once again for coming on to thank you all for listening to remind you that we also have a Patreon. It's five bucks a month. You can subscribe to it. Y'all know what it is. And Alice, when do you have another episode of So There's Your Problem coming out?

Oh, soon. Yeah, just so keep one eye on Do Not Eat's YouTube channel. And as always, Close Dungavel and Yall's Wood Immigration Removal Centers. Indeed. And we also are going to have some live dates coming up, but those have been a little bit in flux recently. So do watch this space for some live shows. Yeah, we're waiting on the European Council to tell us how long until the live show. Yeah, anything else? Any more for anymore? Buy my book. Please buy my book. That's it. Yeah, buy the book, please. Obviously.

But don't buy it from Amazon. No, don't do that. Buy it directly from the publisher. Let's put a link in the description for that. Buy it from Waterstones, maybe if you have to, because they're bad too, but you can find a good indie bookshelf. If you go into Waterstones and you see a short angry bald man punching over bookshelves, get out, especially if you're in high brooms. In the vegan section. It's not high brooms, it's three brooms. Or really, it's just high brooms. Three bridges, high brooms with a field. You're just going to name more and more out the London suburbs.

Yes, I am. Yeah, just oh, if you're in Sydney and watching and you see a tiny bald man trying to crash a Ferrari, then do you watch out? Like if the next time I'm in Milton Keynes, I'm keeping my head on a swivel. Yeah, you should. All right. Yeah, you watch your fucking sex. All right. Oh, that's the problem with HS2. It's going to give Andrew Tate a wider birth of London

can you do that? Oh, no, we have to stop HS2. That's my cross. That's my cross. Well, hasn't like been finished yet. They're afraid because they're concerned that Andrew Tate could expand to Oxfordshire. This is right. It's like one of those. I take one of those Syria Isis maps of like who holds power where Andrew Tate's face pushing further and further out. Epsom traffic.

We have to arm and train the moderate rebels and Hemel Hempsteads. You have to arm and train just the guys in Hemel Hempstead who work as like junior estate agents and play on the fruit machines at Weatherspoon. No one's going to understand any of this. There you go. Good. This is literally just for us. Classic. It's a classic trash heap.

Okay. All right. Okay. We really do have to go now. Thank you all for listening. You know what to do. Subscribe to shit. Go to other shit. Do do things.

Make some plans. Have some fun. And I always forget to do this. Our theme song is called Here We Go. It's by Jin Sang. You can find it on Spotify. It's really good. You should listen to all of his tunes.

I found it from a Simpson wave playlist and I've just been listening to all of his shit ever since. Jesus. Anyways, I will hear from all of you soon. Oh, and tune in for our bonus this week. It's the Halloween Spooktacular that we recorded last week with the ghost of James Midway. Later, everyone. Bye.